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Natasha and YN had been together for a decade. They shared a stable and happy life alongside little Sophia, their four-year-old daughter, and were planning to expand their family soon. Everything seemed perfect until the unexpected arrival of a man shook the entire family structure. Natasha fights to reclaim her family while facing all the new developments in her life.
Warning:
This story describes very delicate subjects such as manipulation, abusive relationships and explicit violence. If you do not feel comfortable, do not read!
After several consultations and medical follow-ups, Sn and Natasha were leaving another clinic after going through the fertilization process once again. They met two years after Natasha joined SHIELD. At the time Sn was participating in a scientific research project and when Sn wasn't helping with the research, she was attending to agents who arrived injured from missions. It was during one of these appointments that she met the woman of her life. After much conversation, Natasha asked Sn out on a first date, Sn asked Natasha out on a second, and the rest is history.
Today, there would be a party at Stark Tower celebrating the Battle of Sokovia. They would be introducing the world to the newest members of the Avengers team: Wanda, Pietro, and Vision. Sn hadn't gone to the last party because she was traveling for work, so this time Tony obliged her to attend. Not that she didn't want to go, as she had been talking about this party for days with Natasha, and according to her, this party would be good to relieve the tension and anxiety she had been feeling during the treatment process. Holding hands, they went to the car to head towards their house, which they had bought right after the wedding proposal, two years before Sophia, their firstborn, arrived in the world.
"I still can't believe the life I have. I have the most beautiful wife in the world, I live the happiest life in the world with a sweet and loving daughter" Sn said with a smile on her face, leaving a kiss on her wife's cheek. "I am so lucky" a huge smile filled Sn's face, and Natasha began to smile as she leaned in to leave a chaste kiss on her wife.
.
Sophia was more energetic than ever, arriving from school recounting all the events of her day. The nanny would arrive soon, and Natasha was trying to get her to take a bath while Sn finished dinner for her and the nanny. After almost an hour, they left Sophia watching a cartoon on YouTube while they started to get ready. Natasha put on a red dress and did light makeup. Her hair was down with its natural curls. Sn put on tailored trousers, a crop top, and a blazer over it. Natasha looked and rolled her eyes with a smile on her face upon seeing the younger woman's cleavage. The nanny arrived, and they left for the party at the tower. Arriving there, the couple found all their friends. Sn finally met Wanda, the girl Natasha had talked about so much in the last few days, talking about her powers. Sn initially didn't like the witch very much because Clint told her about the incident between her and Natasha. After the Sokovia mission, Natasha spent some time disconnected from the world, only with her wife and daughter.
"Wanda, this is Sn, one of the team's doctors. Sn, this is Wanda, the newest Avenger" Tony said while hugging Sn by the shoulders. Sn gave a gentle smile and a friendly look to the witch, who looked shyly at the brunette in front of her. "Nice to meet you, I'm finally meeting the girl my wife hasn't stopped talking about these past few days" Wanda blushed at the comment and smiled at Sn. "Nice to meet you too. The team always talks about you and Sophia" Sn burst out laughing when she saw Natasha rolling her eyes. "That's my cue to go to the bar" the redhead said with a smile. "I'll go with you" the brunette accompanied her wife, their arms intertwined. "You are trying to torture me just because I can't drink" Sn grumbled next to her wife. "If you see it that way."
Sn sat down on a chair while Natasha went into the bar and started preparing a drink for herself. The two kept a conversation about the night and how much they were enjoying the party.
On the other side of the room, Tony Stark was talking to an old friend, OtĂĄvio, a major businessman who came from a traditional family. It was his first time at a party with all the Avengers gathered. Tony hadn't seen his friend for almost a decade because when OtĂĄvio's father died, the heir moved to Tokyo to take over one of his father's companies. OtĂĄvio and Tony were leaning against the railing on the second floor of the large party, which was in the direction of the bar, when OtĂĄvio saw her for the first time. Lust took over his gaze, and Stark noticed his intention and interrupted the moment. "She's off-limits." "I didn't say anything." "Your look doesn't fool me, OtĂĄvio. She is a married woman." "And where is her husband who isn't accompanying her?" "She is married to the woman in front of you, and together they have a four-year-old daughter, so you can take all thoughts out of your head." His gaze remained for a few more seconds until Tony rolled his eyes and moved away from his friend, leaving him there. Carefully, OtĂĄvio positioned his camera discreetly and took a photo of the woman in front of him.
As the party progressed, Maria appeared at the bar and started talking to Sn and Natasha. Hill was the couple's wedding godmother and consequently Sophia's godmother. In the middle of the conversation, Natasha kissed her wife and announced that she was going to look for Clint, leaving Sn and Maria talking about the treatment the younger woman was undergoing to try to have another child. After a few hours of conversation, people ended up leaving the party, leaving only the team and a few people close to Tony, consequently OtĂĄvio, who only needed a highly calculated chance to introduce himself. The team was sitting in a large circle. Sn rested her legs on her wife's thigh. She was sitting next to Wanda, with whom she was currently talking, while Natasha was talking to Clint and Laura. Tony started clapping to draw the conversation circle's attention. When everyone's attention was given, he introduced OtĂĄvio to everyone around him. OtĂĄvio looked into everyone's eyes, giving a gentle smile, but when his gaze reached Sn, he looked intensely at the brunette until she diverted her gaze, slightly uncomfortable, but gave the man a polite smile.
.
It was Saturday when Natasha woke Sn with a kiss on the forehead. "Good morning, my dear."
"You're waking me up early on a weekend." "Sorry, love, but Maria called, and we need to go on a mission that leaves in three hours. I have to go." Sn slowly opened her eyes and pulled Natasha by the neck so they could lie down hugging. "How long will it last?" Sn asked while leaving affectionate pecks on the redhead's shoulder. "I don't know yet but as soon as I have an answer, I'll let you know." Natasha moved away from her wife and only got closer to kiss her lips. "I love you, Nat. Be careful." "I love you much more. You know I'm the best; I'm always careful."
Around 9:30 AM, Sn decided to get up. Sophia was still sleeping next to her in bed. Still yawning, Sn went to the kitchen and started preparing breakfast for her and her daughter. It had been a while since Natasha had gone on a mission. Usually, missions didn't last more than two weeks, but that was enough for her and the four-year-old little redhead to miss her dearly. Sn woke up her daughter, and the two had breakfast together.
At lunchtime, they went to the mall to do some shopping. After going into several stores and buying new clothes and toys, as they were leaving the mall and heading towards the parking lot, Sn accidentally dropped a shopping bag. As she bent down to pick up the bag, a masculine hand entered her field of vision and picked up the bag. They looked at each other, and the man gave the brunette a gentle smile. "OtĂĄvio, correct? You're Tony's friend." Sn stated the obvious as she stood up. "I am, yes, and you are?" "Sn." "Thank you for helping with the bag." "It's nothing" OtĂĄvio said, widening the smile on his face. The two stared at each other and broke contact when Sophia started complaining, asking to go to lunch. "Thank you once again, I need to take this young lady to lunch." "Seriously? What a coincidence, I was going to lunch right now. Where are you two going?" "We're leaving the mall and going to her favorite restaurant. I brought her to have lunch here, but she ended up preferring another place." "Can I join you two?" "You don't have to, I really don't want to bother you" Sn said with furrowed brows and a confused expression. She couldn't understand how a man she had practically just met was wanting to have lunch with her and her daughter. For a few seconds, she wondered if he knew she was married, and not just married to anyone, but to Natasha. "I apologize if I made you uncomfortable, I just thought it would be nice to amicably take you to lunch" OtĂĄvio said, his smile faltering for a few minutes. "I really just wanted to get to know my old friend's friends more. A lunch wouldn't hurt." Sn was a kind-hearted woman, and sometimes a little naive, who couldn't see people's ulterior motives, but it would be difficult for anyone to see ulterior motives in the gestures and the way OtĂĄvio was addressing her. He knew how to win someone over in an unusual way. From the moment he laid eyes on the brunette on the night of the party, a fire appeared in his soul, a feeling known to him. Sn would be a battle he would fight without fear of any consequence. He would step over anyone and do anything to have her. Sophia was starting to get restless and was tugging on her mother's purse to try to get attention. "I accept."
This was the worst mistake Sn ever made in her life.
At the restaurant, Sophia was eating distractedly while OtĂĄvio and Sn were talking between bites. OtĂĄvio was looking at the child with a false look of affection that he could make anyone believe was real. "She has a twinkle in her eyes just like her mother." Sn looked at the man in front of her who was still looking at the little girl. She smiled awkwardly at him but replied politely, "The only thing she has that looks like me, because I think she's a mini-Natasha." He felt a huge urge to roll his eyes at the mention of the redhead but gave a little laugh that was capable of making any woman fall for him instantly. "How long have you two known each other?" Hearing this question, Sn's smile grew. She loved telling people her love story. "I met Natasha right after I joined SHIELD. I had just graduated from medical school but built a good resume over the years I was studying, so I was called for a research project" she paused to drink some water. "So you're a nerd?" "I wouldn't say nerd" Sn said with a laugh. "When I wasn't in the lab, I helped take care of the agents who came back from missions. On one of my shifts, I met Natasha, the love of my life, and the rest is history."
"That's a beautiful love story, it would make a movie, especially with the busy life of the great Black Widow."
That night, Sn and Sophia were watching a princess movie when the house door opened. "Mommy!" Sophia quickly got up and ran towards the redhead who had just entered the house. "My princess, I missed you so much." Natasha picked up her daughter and started leaving kisses all over the younger one's face. Sn, watching the scene, felt great happiness witnessing it, because the thing she loved most in life was seeing her wife with her daughter exchanging affection. These moments showed her that everything in her life was perfect. She had the perfect wife and the perfect daughter and would never tire of it.
The night continued with the three of them on the couch watching Snow White. When Sophia fell asleep in the middle of the movie, Sn and Natasha started talking about their day.
"So you bumped into Tony's friend at the mall, and he invited you two to lunch?" Natasha was trying to understand the situation. She couldn't comprehend the reason for the lunch. Natasha wasn't a jealous or possessive person with her wife, but she saw the look OtĂĄvio gave Sn on the day of the party, the lingering look. It was like he was taking in his wife.
Sn nodded her head. "Yes, it was a very casual lunch. OtĂĄvio was very friendly and nice, plus Sophia loved him."
Natasha sighed, trying to feel a little relieved, but not completely.
"It's okay, I just wanted to understand. On the day of the party, he gave you such a strange look, and now he bumps into you at the mall. A businessman like him shouldn't have time to go to the mall."
"He said he was going to lunch, my love." "Yes, I know." Natasha had a serious expression on her face. "I don't think this is something to worry about, Nat. Like I said, he was respectful the whole time and interested in getting to know Sophia." The serious expression remained on Natasha's face. "I trust you, my love. But I want you to be careful. OtĂĄvio might seem friendly, but I don't want him getting too close."
Sn smiled and hugged Natasha.
"I'll be careful, my love."
It was almost a family tradition to go to Central Park on Sundays. The little redhead would wake up excited and run to her mothers' bed; she was always the first to wake up on Sundays. Yn was not a morning person and always grumbled. Natasha always laughed, every Sunday was the same, and this one would be no different.
After getting all the necessary food for the picnic, the family walked calmly to the spot where they always stayed. Yn spread a blanket on the ground, and Natasha started arranging things. Sophia clapped happily at the moment and left a kiss on Natasha's cheek. The redhead's heart warmed with the child's gesture, and she left a kiss on her head. "I don't get one?" Yn asked with a fake pout. "Mommy is jealous, Mommy is jealous," Natasha started laughing at the situation while the brunette rolled her eyes playfully. "I love you, Mommy, you don't need to be sad," little Sophia tried to reassure her mother. The rest of breakfast continued calmly, with lots of laughter and stolen kisses from Yn. As time passed, the three decided to take a walk around the Park.
As always, Sophia was enchanted by everything. "Mommy, can we have one?" She asked, pointing a finger at a dog passing by with its owner, looking at Natasha. "That's a very important decision, my love; Mommy and I have to talk about it." "It's okay, Mommy, I'll wait," said the little redhead understandingly. "That's out of the question," Yn whispered to Natasha, and the redhead nodded in agreement. "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy," Sophia started shouting in Yn's arms while jumping frantically. "Mommy, I want to see the ducks up close." Yn looked a little relieved after her daughter's shouts and handed her to her wife as they walked hand-in-hand toward the ducks. "Look, Mommy! Look!" The child said happily, pointing at the animals. "I'm looking, my love," Natasha said with a smile on her face. Sophia turned to Natasha and leaned towards her ear. "I want a duck, Mommy," she whispered as if it were a secret. "Please, talk nicely to Mommy." "Since when do we keep secrets in this family?" Yn approached. "She has a request for you," Natasha said. "I was telling Mommy that I wanted a duck." "But don't you already want a puppy?" Yn asked, mimicking Sophia's voice. "They could be friends," the little redhead said with a smile as if she had just created the most brilliant idea of her life.
After the short break for the ducks, the three continued walking through the park, talking about everything. At lunchtime, they returned home, and the Sunday continued like any other Sunday in the Romanoff household. Sophia was quite tired after playing in the park, jumping in the pool almost all afternoon, and still having energy to play with her toys in the early evening. Natasha loved all of it and was more than happy waiting for her next child. Fifteen years ago, she would never have imagined the life she had, and she couldn't be more grateful for it all. After dinner, Sophia took a bath, and Natasha carried her to bed, where the girl finally fell asleep.
Yn was sitting in a chair near the pool when Natasha approached with slow steps and a half-smile on her lips. The brunette was staring at a point in the pool. "It was a busy day with Sophia," Natasha said as she took her wife in her arms, who let out a small yelp of surprise. "I will never get tired of this." "Neither will I, my love," the redhead kissed her wife slowly, who immediately reciprocated. The two were already sitting on a small sofa in the house's leisure area. Yn had her face buried in Natasha's neck and was leaving small pecks there. It was an intimate moment that they wouldn't trade for anything; they wished these moments could last forever.
On Monday, the couple's routine returned to normal:
Taking a shower together
Making breakfast
Waking Sophia up
Getting Sophia ready for school
Having family breakfast
On the way to school, Sophia sang a children's song while Natasha drove. The school was close to Stark Tower. After dropping Sophia off at school, the two headed towards the tower, where Yn was working on a neuro research project, which was her area in medicine. Natasha was going to use the tower's gym with Steve and Tony. The tower was a little busy because, in a few days, the Avengers and some people who worked there would move to the Avengers Compound. Natasha was the only one who wouldn't move to the compound because of Sophia's school. Tony and Yn talked and opted to let the research continue at the tower since Stark was financing the entire project.
Natasha was at the gym while Yn was already in the lab. In the gym, Steve tried to strike up a conversation with the concentrated redhead. Tony was running on the treadmill when Natasha caught his attention. "Did you know your friend accidentally bumped into Yn at the mall?" Upon hearing that, Tony tried to shrug it off and keep going on the treadmill. "Don't pretend you're not listening, Stark." "I saw the way he looked at her on the day of the party. Whatever he's planning, he'd better stop." The redhead spoke as she got on the treadmill next to Tony. "Relax, Romanoff," he said, rolling his eyes. "Octavio isn't crazy enough to try to steal her from you." She stared at the man next to her. "I didn't mean to imply that, but you are saying it," she said calmly, but the truth was her heart started beating faster. A nervous current spread over her body with Tony's words. "I'm just saying, I'm sure it was just a coincidence that he ran into her at the mall," he tried to lighten the slightly tense mood. "He asked her out for lunch." "Did she go?" "With Sophia, she said it was just a friendly thing." "Don't you trust your wife?" Natasha turned her gaze back to Stark. If a look could kill, he would already be dead. "I trust Yn with my life; I don't trust your friend." Tony took a deep breath, turned off the machine, and left the gym without saying anything. Natasha rolled her eyes at his attitude and looked at Steve, who was on the other side of the gym but could hear everything with his super-soldier hearing. He gave her a smile while she just looked at him and concentrated on running.
Maria Hill was in Washington reviewing the final details before calling Natasha and sending the redhead on a two-week mission to Europe. Apparently, a small threat was forming, and she was going to ask Natasha to investigate more deeply. She knew the redhead would go unnoticed even as a famous Avenger, as she was still a master of disguise.
Natasha received the call and went to the lab where Yn was working. She knocked on the door and entered. The brunette was reading a book while taking some notes. "My love, can I have a moment?" Yn took off her glasses and walked toward her wife. She left a kiss on her cheek and a peck on her mouth. "Maria called me from Washington." Natasha interlaced her arms around Yn's waist. "A mission, I imagine." Yn interlaced her arms around Nat's neck. "It's not two weeks until I get back. It's a mission where I need to investigate undercover in Europe." "Two weeks, Tasha?" Yn made puppy dog eyes as she looked at her. "Don't look at me like that, I'll be back before the test." "When are you leaving?" "I need to be in Washington by lunchtime tomorrow." "Then we still have time." "Time?" Natasha asked with a smile on her face, already knowing her wife.
At lunch, Yn didn't leave the lab; she only sent a message to her wife saying she would meet her in the late afternoon and that she already had her lunch with her. In the afternoon, Natasha read the mission files and picked Sophia up from school. With Sophia in her arms, she entered the tower's kitchen, where Yn was already waiting for her daughter and wife. She stood up as Natasha put Sophia on the floor, who ran into her mother's arms. "Hi, my love, Mommy missed you so much." "Me too, Mommy." "How was school?" "It was fun, Mommy, I played a lot with my friends."
Since Natasha was traveling early in the morning to Washington, she took her wife and daughter out to dinner. She made a reservation at Yn's favorite Italian restaurant. They spent the evening talking. Natasha explained to Sophia that she would have to take a short trip but would return as quickly as possible to be with her daughter.
Natasha put Sophia to sleep while Yn took a shower. The redhead entered the room as Yn was coming out of the bathroom; the towel was still on her body. Nat passed her wife and went into the closet. Yn took a deep breath, already knowing the long night they would have. When Natasha returned, she was wearing her sleepwear. From behind, she put her arms around Yn's hips and left kisses on her wife's neck, who shivered at every moment. She guided her to the bed where Natasha laid Yn down and got on top, leaving kisses. Yn had her hands on Natasha's back; the two were in a hurry, needy, and in love.
Early in the morning, when the redhead woke up, she made breakfast and, before leaving, said goodbye to her wife and left a kiss on her daughter's forehead.
When Yn arrived at work, as she entered the elevator, she came face-to-face with a familiar face.
Upon entering the elevator, Yn noticed OtĂĄvio was in it. "Good morning, sunshine." "Good morning, OtĂĄvio," she said with a gentle smile. "Did you come to talk to Tony?" "Yes, and also to see the tower. Do you think you could show me around?"
She looked at the watch on her wrist and then at him. "I can take you up to Tony, but I need to get to the lab." What he really wanted was to take her out of there right then, lock her up in his Tokyo home, and never let her have contact with Natasha and Sophia again, but he knew he had to be patient. He would have to wait for the right moment for Yn to finally be all his. "That's fine, your research is more important anyway." "You're being dramatic. I just have to start early today. I have to pick up Sophia from school since Natasha is on a mission." Upon hearing that Natasha was not in New York, OtĂĄvio's eyes lit up, and he tried to hide the smile forming on his face. "Sophia, I miss her." "She really liked you." The elevator chimed, and they got out. To Yn's delight, Tony was waiting for the elevator. He looked surprised to see his friend and Yn together. This wasn't right, and he was already starting to perceive OtĂĄvio's ulterior motives. "Great, Tony is already here." "Until next time, OtĂĄvio." "Bye, Bella. Good work." She gave a gentle smile and went on her way to lock herself in her lab.
With each passing day, she felt she was getting closer to a result. She was dedicating her life to a project to undo brainwashing in agents who had managed to escape Hydra's clutches, but for that, she needed to study mind control, and that was what she was deeply immersed in. Tony always helped her on some nights when she needed to stay late. She discovered methods to quickly control people's minds using only a serum, but what she needed to know was how to undo that control. If she could find a way to reverse all the damage caused, it would greatly boost her career, the only thing missing to make her life complete. She sat down and started reading and reviewing all the notes she had taken the day before.
At lunchtime, a knock on the door startled her, and she quickly got up. When she opened the door, she saw it was OtĂĄvio with two bags. "I noticed you didn't show up in the kitchen for lunch, so I decided to bring lunch to you," he said, already walking into the lab. She looked at him and opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came to mind. "Do you have time for a little lunch? A break would be good." "Of course, but can we eat somewhere else?" They went to the complex's kitchen, which was empty. "Looks like we have the place all to ourselves."
"So, OtĂĄvio, how is your day going?" she asked, opening her food.
"It's been good so far. I talked to Tony about some business in Tokyo." "Oh, I see. Do you plan on staying here long?" "There are certain matters keeping me in this city right now. As soon as I can resolve them, I'll go back to Tokyo," he said, looking into Yn's eyes. The matter he needed to resolve before he could go back was Yn herself; he would only return to Tokyo with her on his jet. "I hope everything works out for you."
At 2:40 PM, Yn left her lab with her purse and car keys, already rushing to pick up Sophia from school. When she got to the garage, she tried to start the car, but it wouldn't turn on at all, which she found strange since the car was less than two months old. She looked to check the gas and realized it was empty. The brunette took a deep breath because she was already running late to pick up her daughter. She got out of the car and walked towards the garage exit to try and catch a taxi. "Need a ride?"
"Are you really everywhere?" "Sorry, I just wanted to help," OtĂĄvio said, laughing. "I need to pick up Sophia from school, but believe it or not, my car ran out of gas." "Come on, I'll take you."
OtĂĄvio dropped Yn and Sophia off at home, promising to send someone to drop off the car, already fueled, later that day. As an excuse, he asked for her phone number and immediately sent a message, which she replied to politely and friendly.
That evening, Natasha called Yn, a quick call due to the time difference. They talked about Sophia and how Yn couldn't wait for Natasha to return so they could do the test together. They said goodbye, and Yn went to try and sleep.
Around nine o'clock at night, the doorbell rang. She suspected it was the car. The regret was immediate because all she wanted was to stay in bed. Yn was wearing sweatpants and a tank top. She put a hoodie over it to be dressed more comfortably in front of whoever was delivering the car. Not so much to her surprise, the person at the door was OtĂĄvio. He had the key to the car that Yn's wife had given her a few months ago, an Audi A5. She didn't need to change cars since her old one wasn't even two years old, but one night Natasha saw Yn on the couch researching that specific car. He handed the car key to Yn, who walked out of the house and headed towards the car to park it in the garage next to her wife's Corvette. "You didn't have to deliver it personally." "But I wanted the opportunity to see your beautiful face one more time today." Yn blushed, embarrassed, and was looking for a response. She didn't know if it was an innocent flirtation or if she should distance herself from him. "I think your words are a little inappropriate for my situation." OtĂĄvio tried to disguise the distaste he felt upon hearing this. "Your situation? Married to the Black Widow and having a daughter with her?" She stopped in front of the car and gave a gentle smile. "Thank you once again for today." He smiled with a charm that would make any girl swoon. "No need to thank me. I like your friendship. I apologize if I crossed a line with my words." "No problem, I think I interpreted it wrongly." They said their goodbyes, and Yn got into the car and drove towards the garage.
On another continent, Natasha's cell phone emitted an alert announcing someone's arrival at the house. Her security system was the best she could have. She opened the cameras on her phone and had an unpleasant surprise. In their conversation a few minutes ago, Yn had not mentioned that the car was with OtĂĄvio. Seeing the scene, Natasha's heart raced, along with a bad feeling, but she knew she could trust her wife. They had been through so much together and were expecting their second child.
OtĂĄvio and Yn continued to see each other throughout the week. Be it for a quick breakfast, lunch, or a small afternoon snack. They were getting closer and closer. Yn was so innocent and believed it was just a friendship. She felt nothing more than that, as she was madly in love with her wife. He saw it all as a game, a game he was going to win.
Natasha tried to control herself not to mention what she saw through the cameras. Sophia missed her mother and started crying every night before bed. Sometimes Natasha couldn't call because of the mission, but when she could, she would sing to her daughter and tell stories. Thus, the two weeks soon passed.
Natasha returned in the early morning, a day earlier than planned; she wanted to surprise her wife. With her, besides the documents she would need to review before submitting them to Maria, she brought a bouquet of flowers along with a box of her wife's favorite chocolates. The clock marked 3:45 in the morning. The redhead left the documents in the office and went upstairs with the gifts for her wife. Upon entering the room, she was greeted by the sweetest scene of her life; her heart warmed, and a smile took over her face. Sophia and Yn were sleeping, hugging each other. She quietly and carefully walked to the closet and put on pajamas. She lay down next to the loves of her life and fell into a peaceful sleep after two weeks of sleeping unaccustomed.
Yn woke up to Sophia's screams. The mother quickly sat up in bed, startled, and calmed down when she saw Sophia jumping on Natasha. "Mommy! Mommy!" "Mommy's mommy is here!" The three of them were smiling. Yn rubbed her eyes and stretched before snuggling into her daughter and wife. The small family hugged, and Natasha pressed kisses to Yn's head.
Today was Saturday. Natasha had the idea to take her Corvette and spend a family weekend at their beach house in the Hamptons. The house was a gift from Tony Stark when they got married. They went once a month and usually spent a few weeks there during their vacations.
After a very hectic breakfast with the little girl, they packed their things and set off on a nearly two-hour drive. Sophia ended up falling asleep early on the way. Natasha glanced at her wife, who was almost asleep. She ran a hand over her wife's arm. Yn looked back at her, unbuckled her seatbelt, and placed a kiss on her cheek. "I missed you so much," Yn says with a smile. "You have no idea how much I want to show you how much I missed you." "Natasha!" The brunette scolds her wife. "Sophia is in the car." "I'm not saying I'm going to show you here in the car."
Throughout the trip, the subjects kept changing. "The doctor called yesterday and said my body is ready for a test." Natasha looked at Yn with sparkling eyes. "Do you want to stop at a pharmacy to buy one?" "There's no need, I brought five; I bought them yesterday." "Five?" Natasha asks with surprise. "Yn says with a little laugh. "To avoid the risk of a false result." "I miss you being pregnant with Sophia," the redhead says, recalling the moments she went through almost five years ago. "I was a big hormonal mess."
Yn would cry over anything, no matter how simple. Natasha would go out late at night with Yn to fulfill her pregnant cravings. The first time they went out late was the day Yn suddenly woke up crying with a desire for a strawberry milkshake with French fries. Natasha woke up a little startled upon hearing the younger woman's crying; she thought something was happening to Sophia in her womb. They went to the nearest 24-hour diner at 2:30 a.m. on a Monday night, but Natasha never complained because she loved every detail of Sophia's process.
When Yn found out she was pregnant, they both took a break from work for a while and returned when Sophia was eight months old. It took a lot of research to find a nanny Natasha could trust; in fact, Amanda still works as Sophia's nanny today. The couple had all the support possible. Yn's mother always came to visit her daughter, even though she didn't support their marriage, which still made Natasha uncomfortable.
It took about four months for them to decide on every detail of Sophia's room. The name itself was decided a week before the birth: Sophia Helena Romanoff. They were in doubt between those two names. Yn had the idea to unite them. Natasha chose Sophia, and Yn chose Helena. Sophia's room was like any baby's, very delicate with pastel tones and some drawings on the wall. It had a crib, two rocking chairs for the mothers, a dresser, and a baby pink wardrobe. Every detail was chosen with care and happiness. Natasha had never in her life imagined going through such special moments as these, and now everything was about to start again.
They arrived at the beach house. Natasha carried Sophia, who was still asleep, while Yn brought in the bags. After settling into the house, leaving Sophia in the guest room, they went to their own room. Yn took five pregnancy tests out of her bag and kissed Natasha on the mouth. "Nat, I'm so nervous." "Don't worry, my love, everything will be fine." "I know, but what if it's negative?" Yn was feeling frustrated. "We'll try again," Natasha says, trying to calm her wife. Yn went into the bathroom and completed the whole process. Natasha waited in the bedroom, pacing back and forth. When the younger woman came out of the bathroom, Natasha felt a nervous current run through her body. "Yn says, taking a deep breath. "I have to wait at least ten minutes." "Nat, I'm so nervous, try to distract me somehow." Natasha let out a laugh, trying to ease the nervousness she was feeling herself. "Do you remember our first date?" The redhead asks Yn, who looked at her with sparkling eyes. "How could I forget?"
Natasha was looking for any excuse to go to the medical wing, including a simple back pain caused by a training session. Any reason was valid for her just to be able to spend a few minutes with Yn. Yn treated her like a human; she was one of the few people Natasha talked to during work. She saw beyond the wounds, she talked about deep things during some sutures or mandatory blood tests by S.H.I.E.L.D. On any given Tuesday, Natasha entered the medical wing with supposed terrible pain in her back, but Yn quickly realized it wasn't that serious. Since the movement was slow, Natasha spent some time there, and one thing led to another. When she realized it, she was asking Yn to the movies. The truth is that Natasha had never entered a movie theater accompanied; every time she went, she saw couples, and she hated it but secretly wanted it for herself. They went to watch Star Wars; the screening was packed. During the movie, their hands met when grabbing popcorn. Yn was grateful the lighting didn't show the red mess that was her face, what she didn't know was that Natasha was the same way. After the movie, they went to dinner at a Japanese restaurant and talked about everything. Yn was still a little startled and incredulous that Natasha had asked her out; sure, they always flirted, but this was totally different.
When Natasha dropped Yn off at her apartment, their first kiss happened. Yn turned to give Natasha an awkward hug. After the hug, Natasha brushed some strands of hair from Yn's face. They stared at each other for a few seconds as they leaned in. Natasha started the kiss, and Yn reciprocated. In less than a minute, the brunette was in Natasha's lap. After the warm kisses, Yn got out of the car and gave Natasha a smile. After that night, they had lunch together every time the redhead wasn't on a mission.
Fifteen minutes passed.
Yn's heart was beating too fast. Natasha could not hide her wife's nervousness. They went into the bathroom. The redhead picked up the first test, and her face fell.
Negative.
"Negative," she says with a tight voice. Yn immediately grabs the four remaining tests. "I don't believe it," she says, crying. She immediately grabs Natasha and starts sobbing into her chest. The redhead hugs her wife as if she would never let go. She still hadn't understood the final result, but the sobs only increased and fed the worst. After a few minutes, Yn pulls away from her wife and gives Natasha a broad smile. "We're going to be moms again!" The redhead's eyes began to shine with tears of emotion as Yn hands the four tests to Natasha. "Pregnant," she whispers to the test with a radiant smile.
Everything would repeat itselfâthe best moments of their lives. More memories, more love.
The calm before the storm.
They returned to New York early Tuesday morning. They still managed to drop Sophia off at school and went straight to the Tower. The move had already been completed. Stark Tower was now exclusively for the task force operations commanded by Maria and for some research. Yn would still have to stay there because of her research and her work as a doctor, taking care of some agents, though she was not the only doctor on site. When they arrived at the Tower, they saw several agents trying to adapt. When they went up to the private floor, which few people had access toâthe area that was formerly the Avengers' kitchen and loungeâthey found Maria.
Maria was sitting, drinking her coffee while reading some documents, and Tony was lying on a distant sofa. "I need to talk to you," Tony shouts to Yn. "Good morning, Stark," Natasha says. "Good morning, Romanoff," Tony rolls his eyes. "Now I need to talk to your wife."
Yn greets Maria with a hug, kisses her wife on the mouth, and goes over to Tony, who is already walking towards the elevator. They talked about the research for a while, but Tony was more restless than usual. Yn was giving her life to this research, and Tony helped however he could. He didn't want to state the reason for his concern. He was worried about Octavio getting closer and closer to Yn. With Natasha's return, he hoped that would stop. The problem isn't Yn; he's concerned about his friend who is taking advantage of the false friendship and Yn's innocence in believing people. Tony knew this wouldn't end well, but he couldn't do anything.
Still in the kitchen, Maria and Natasha were discussing details and strategies for the continuation of the task force. Maria was a little bothered by the things she had observed in recent weeks. It wasn't anything involving the task force; it involved her friend and the newcomer in New York. Maria wasn't stupid; she observed how Octavio looked at Yn. She observed how Yn was naive and looked at him in a totally different wayâjust a friend looking at a friend. She was reluctant about whether to tell Natasha or not; she didn't want to get involved in a possible couple's argument, especially now that they were trying to have a second child. "You're going to tell me what's going through your head right now," Natasha said, a good observer, realizing that Maria was a little different. "I'm just thinking about some things; it's nothing important." The redhead narrowed her eyes and stared at her friend. "Are you sure?" "I'm sure." They continued talking for a few hours until the conversation was moved to Maria's office.
Across town, Octavio was shopping. In recent weeks, he had carefully observed every detail about Yn. He knew she wouldn't accept the gift he had just bought, a Tiffany necklace, one of Yn's favorite brands. He decided to save the necklace and wait for the right moment to give it to her. Right now, he just wanted to have lunch with her, but he knew Natasha could arrive at any moment; after all, the two weeks had passed very quickly for his taste, but he had taken enough advantage to spend time with Yn. As he leaves the store, he gets into his sports car, wondering if Natasha has already arrived in New York, and before reaching the Tower, he stops at a chocolate shop and buys a box of chocolates with strawberries, Yn's favorites.
At lunchtime, Yn was totally immersed in her conversation with Tony. The two were in Yn's office/laboratory; they were working non-stop, reading and taking notes. Natasha was going over important information with Maria. Agents were leaving for their break.
Octavio arrives at the Tower; his access was granted, one of the only non-employees who had access to the important floors. He got into the elevator and pressed the button for Yn's lab floor. With the box of chocolates in one hand and lunch in the other, he knew that after a weekend, she didn't like to go out for lunch and returned to the lab as quickly as possible so as not to waste time. He gets out of the elevator and notices that the door is locked. The one who opens the door is Tony, who immediately looks at Octavio with an irritated gaze. "What are you doing here?" "Is that any way to receive an old friend?" "Octavio, I didn't expect you here right now," Yn says, not taking her eyes off the book. "Lunch break, come on, I brought your lunch," he shouts to Yn. "Since when do you bring lunch for a married woman?" Tony says, still staring at his friend. "My friend always forgets to eat lunch, so as a good friend, I bring lunch to her daily." "He's spoiling me," Yn says as she gets up and walks towards the door. "I'm having lunch with you guys today," Stark says, and Octavio rolls his eyes.
They take the elevator to the kitchen, and Octavio hands Yn the box of chocolates that she loves so much. She feels a little awkward but accepts it. When they get to the kitchen, she sits down and takes out her cell phone, calling Natasha. "Tasha, I'm waiting for you in the kitchen for lunch." "I'll be there in a minute," the redhead replies, and Yn hangs up. Tony gives a small smile while Octavio tries to control the anger he is feeling. They maintain a healthy conversation until Natasha arrives. The smile on her face is replaced by a serious expression. She stares at Octavio and then at Tony. "My dear, I ordered your favorite food earlier; I believe it's arriving soon," Yn says, getting up from her chair and giving Natasha a hug. "Thank you, dorogoy." "Octavio brought lunch for him and Tony; I'll wait for ours to arrive." "I brought some for you," he says. Natasha looks at him again. "What are you doing here? Do you work here?" "I'm just visiting two friends," he says, putting a smile on his face.
Natasha and Yn sit on the sofa waiting for lunch to arrive. Yn lies on Natasha's lap while eating the chocolates and strawberries. Natasha's blood boils knowing who gave that to her wife, but she politely controls herself. By this time, Octavio had already left the Tower, and Tony had gone to Pepper. The two of them were talking and planning how they would tell the family about the pregnancy. It had been a few years since Natasha had managed to forgive and reconnect with her parents and sister. Yelena always visited the couple's home and brought gifts for Sophia. There were weekends when Melina came with Alexei to New York and took Sophia to stay with them. Besides this family, there was the Avengers family, since Yn did not have contact with her parents after marrying Natasha. They never accepted her sexuality, and few were the times Yn's mother messaged her asking about Sophia.
The food arrived; they ate lunch, continued their day, picked Sophia up from school, and went home.
Natasha couldn't help but notice how Octavio looked at her wife. She was uncomfortable, from the encounter at the mall, the footage of him dropping the car off for her, and the brief mentions on the calls when she could talk to Yn. She was jealous, and a simple box of chocolates made her almost explode. She trusted Yn, but she did not like Octavio.
Sophia was already asleep, and they were in their room. Natasha checked her phone one last time before bed.
"Party tomorrow at 9 PM at the new Avengers compound."
She shows Yn, who gives a small laugh, kisses her wife on the lips, and snuggles closer.
Yelena was in New York taking care of some business when she decided to show up at her sister's house early in the morning.
The couple's daily routine remained the same, except for the fact that Yelena was going to pick up Sophia from school and they were going to hit the road for the Avengers compound. Important figures would be at this party, but they didn't care. Natasha drove her Corvette while Yn slept in the passenger seat. She knew Octavio would be at the party and would do everything to keep Yn out of his reach for the night. She had already noticed his intentions, but her wife was too naive to realize. Upon reaching the entrance of the compound, Natasha woke up Yn. Wanda was waiting for them in the entrance hall with a smile on her face.
Wanda gave them a complete tour of the compound, she even showed them a small lake behind it that was a few minutes walk away, everything was perfect. Tony spared no effort or expense in building the place. The three walked back to the compound and entered the recreation area where the party would be held, all the Avengers were gathered, even Clint, who was retired, he was with Laura. Yn hugged Laura, and they got lost in conversation for a few minutes. Laura was one of her wedding bridesmaids, and she was desperate to give her friend the news, but Natasha wanted to wait until night.
After speaking with all the Avengers present, Natasha and Yn went to Natasha's room. After lunch yesterday, Yn noticed some strange actions and attitudes coming from Natasha, the redhead wasn't talking much to Yn. Yn, on the other hand, became nervous and afraid that she was giving up on having another baby, despite it being a little late for that decision. Their weekend was so good, and then, all of a sudden, Natasha changed.
"You're acting strange," Yn told her wife. "Strange?" "You've been acting strangely since yesterday afternoon. You might be the best spy in the world, but I'm your wife, and I notice." "You notice my change, but you don't notice the intentions around you," Natasha said calmly. "I don't know what you're talking about," the brunette was starting to get restless and got out of bed.
"That's what I'm talking about, you don't notice the things around you."
"I knew it, I knew it, you don't want to have the baby with me anymore." Natasha's eyes widened when she heard this. How could Yn think that? She knew that a family was everything Natasha wanted in life.
"The baby isn't the problem, and you know that."
"Natasha, whatever it is, just tell me. I don't want to fight with you here and now."
"He is the problem, Yn!" she took a deep breath before looking at her wife. "I can't get the way he looks at you out of my head. I can't get the security camera video of him at our house, handing you the car, out of my head." Yn frowned and stared at Natasha, wanting to say something but not finding the words. "I can't understand why he has lunch with you every day while I was away, why he brings you lunch and small chocolate gifts."
"Nat, you're jealous," Yn said, still with a strange expression on her face. "I'm not jealous, I'm worried, worried about him trying to take you away from me." Yn approached Natasha and left a chaste kiss on her lips. "That will never happen, my love. Natasha, you have no idea how much I love you." Natasha wrapped her hands around her wife's waist and rested her head on her shoulder. She knew her wife would never do anything to destroy the family they had. Throughout her life, Natasha had faced many difficulties, and it was still a mystery to her why she was loved by someone like Yn.
They stayed in the room for the rest of the day until the party started. Natasha's chest still held an agony, a strange feeling that everything was falling apart. Perhaps it was a sixth sense or a very good instinct, which was true. That night, many hearts would be broken because on the way to the Avengers compound was Octavio. He was accompanied by a woman, the woman who that night would ruin the life of whoever Octavio commanded.
The two spent the rest of the day lying in the room, talking about the future. Yn was doing everything to prove to her wife that she would never leave her, and Natasha was realizing this, her heart was gradually calming down. Closer to the time of the party, they took a shower and went to get ready. Natasha was wearing a dark blue silk dress, with her hair perfectly waved. Yn was wearing a long black dress with a bare back, her hair pulled up in a French twist. They stayed a little longer in the room, waiting for half an hour past the scheduled time for the party.
As time passed, they went downstairs and greeted all their friends. Natasha's eyes quickly found the person she would be keeping an eye on throughout the party. Octavio was at the bar with a brunette girl wearing a black dress and loose hair, she hadn't drunk anything, and Natasha noticed that the girl next to the man had some traits similar to Yn's. He was saying something in the woman's ear and had his hands on her waist.
"Love, what do you think about telling them now?" Yn whispered in the redhead's ear. "I think it's perfect."
"Yn and I have something to share with you tonight." All the Avengers' eyes were on the couple. Yn had a shy smile, and Natasha was grinning from ear to ear. "I'm pregnant!" Yn announced. Everyone started smiling and congratulating them. Maria hugged Yn, and Laura hugged Natasha, followed by Wanda, Clint, Tony, and Thor. Tony grabbed a bottle of champagne from the center of the table where they were, shook it, and popped it in the air, celebrating. Everyone around looked on curiously but then ignored it. He handed a glass to Yn, but Natasha snatched it from her hand instantly and rolled her eyes.
Clint and Natasha were talking. He told her that the Avengers family was growing bigger and bigger and that he was proud of the woman she had become, that he felt great pride in her. Natasha's eyes were shining, but she blinked quickly, and of course, her best friend noticed.
On the other side of the room, Octavio carefully observed the celebration and approached with Livia in his arms. "Good evening, Avengers," he said, approaching everyone, especially Tony. Natasha stared at him quickly, and Yn gave him a smile. "I came here to wish everyone a good evening and join my great friend." "Great, we're celebrating good news," Tony said, his voice already slightly altered due to the drink. "We're going to have another Romanoff baby running around the compound," "Lady Yn is pregnant!" Thor completed Tony's sentence. Octavio's smile faltered for a few seconds, something Maria, Natasha, and Clint immediately noticed. He approached Yn, hugged her, and whispered in her ear, "Congratulations, I'm happy for you." Finally, he left a kiss on her cheek. He approached Natasha and extended his hand to the redhead, complimenting her and wishing her congratulations. The atmosphere in the room quickly became heavy, and Tony tried to break the ice. "Aren't you going to introduce us to the beautiful lady next to you?" The girl smiled at the team and nodded shyly. "This is Livia, a great investor and friend." Everyone greeted her.
As the night went on, everyone was drinking wildly. Natasha didn't drink much to support her wife's pregnancy. Octavio was getting stranger and stranger and approaching Yn throughout the night. There was a moment when Natasha distractedly grabbed the glass that Thor was drinking from, she noticed the strange taste but ignored it because she was in a circle of friends, nothing bad could happen. At most, it was just a weird mix from the team. After half an hour, she felt everything spinning around her. Yn asked if she wanted to go inside, sensing that her wife was acting strangely. She was staring at Octavio a lot and touching Yn possessively. The worst thing was that she was still drinking, no longer Thor's drink, but a whiskey. After a few more minutes, she got up to go to the bathroom. Yn got up to accompany her wife, but she refused and asked Maria to stay with Yn. The younger one found the request strange but let it go and stayed with Maria anyway. Octavio was talking to Steve, so Natasha didn't care. She just needed to go to the bathroom to wash her face.
She arrived at the bathroom and immediately saw people making out and rolled her eyes. She approached the sink, took a deep breath, and washed her face. Her vision was getting blurry with every moment, and she could only think of Yn. How she loved Yn. When she finished washing her face, she turned towards the door. When she looked at the door, Livia entered. Her hair, which was loose before, was now in a bun similar to Yn's. Natasha's vision was blurry, trying to see who was in front of her, she immediately confused her: "Yn, I need you, Moya lyubov," Livia smiled diabolically and approached Natasha. She didn't waste any time and immediately kissed the redhead, who returned the kiss sloppily. "Your smell is different," Nat said, breaking the kiss. Livia groaned and kissed her again. Natasha was no longer thinking clearly at that moment, she pinned the brunette against the wall and started sucking on her neck violently while trying to lower the strap of her dress.
Ten minutes had passed, and Yn was starting to get restless and decided to go after Natasha with Maria. Octavio was still observing Yn, and his heart was racing in his chest. If his plan worked, Yn would be his tonight. They went down the stairs of the place where they were and went to the bathroom. Octavio excused himself from the conversation he was having with Steve and walked calmly across the large ballroom, following Yn and Maria.
Yn knocked on the bathroom door, but no one opened it. Carefully, she opened the door and immediately came face to face with the biggest nightmare of her life. Livia was groaning uncontrollably in Natasha's hands. A wave of shock descended through Yn's body, her eyebrows furrowed, and an expression of horror formed, her hands began to tremble. Maria walked in right after and was speechless. Natasha continued fucking Livia against the bathroom wall and biting her body.
"Natasha?" Yn said with a choked voice. No response was given, so Maria walked with heavy steps towards the redhead and pulled her by the hair. Livia was startled and screamed. "Shut your mouth!" Maria yelled, pointing her finger at the brunette. She turned to Natasha and shouted, "What the fuck is this?! What are you thinking?" Livia started dressing quickly, and Natasha shot a furious look at her friend. After a few seconds, she realized the situation and looked at Maria in shock, then turned her head to Livia, who was fixing her hair. "Sorry, I just... well, I'm leaving now," the brunette said and walked out the door and into a waiting car.
"No, no, no, no, no," the redhead started crying, and Maria still stared at her with a look of disappointment. The brunette looked towards the door to see how Yn was but found no one, so she got up, running after her friend, leaving Natasha crying on the bathroom floor.
Yn was running clumsily out of the compound. Her breathing was out of control, and sobs escaped her. Octavio was running after the brunette. When he finally caught up with her, he grabbed her by the waist and started saying sweet words. Her body was going limp, and she let herself be carried by him. He carried her bridal style and took her to his car. He left a kiss on her forehead and took her out of the compound area. She was still sobbing in the passenger seat and saying nonsensical things. But the important thing for him was that he had gotten what he wanted so much.
Maria was running all over the ballroom, bumping into drunk people dancing. She couldn't find Yn, so she quickly went up the stairs, calling Clint and Laura. They noticed the worried expression on Maria's face. "Clint, I need you to go to the bathroom and help Natasha, now," she ordered in a voice she only used with agents in her task force, he immediately realized it was serious, so he ran off. "Laura, I need you to help me find Yn." The ex-agent agreed, and the two immediately started searching.
In the bathroom, Clint found Natasha crying on the floor. He locked the bathroom door, approached his friend, and pulled her into his lap. "Hey, hey. I'm here," Natasha looked at him with red eyes, still crying. "Clint, I ruined everything, one minute I was with her, and then it wasn't her," she let out a sob. Clint started comforting his friend, even though he didn't fully understand the situation. "Don't tell her, don't let Maria tell Yn, please." The archer began to understand what had happened and sighed. "It's going to be okay, it's going to be okay."
Maria and Laura couldn't find Yn anywhere at the party. Laura went to look for Clint. Maria went to the security room to see if she could find anything on the cameras, she did. She saw Yn running out of the compound, falling once but getting up quickly, Octavio ran after her, picked her up, and put her in his car.
At that moment, Natasha was already in her room, still crying and saying that she didn't know, that she was too drunk. Maria entered the room and walked up to Natasha. "Do you have any idea what that drunk head of yours just did?" "Now she's with him, he took her." Hearing this, she got out of bed but almost fell to the floor. "No, no, I need to go after her now." "You won't do anything now, you'll wait until you're sober to solve all your problems."
On the way to New York, Yn was starting to calm down. Octavio was stroking her knee, which was currently raised.
"I don't understand, almost ten years together, and she does this," "She did the one thing I can't forgive," "My mother suffered for years because of this, she knows what I went through in my childhood because of it," Yn's voice was still trembling. "Some people never change, especially someone with a past like hers," "Natasha's not like that, maybe she was just too drunk," "Octavio, I need to go back to the compound now, I need to talk to her."
Octavio took a deep breath to avoid getting stressed and answered Yn in a calm voice, "I won't do that. This is unforgivable. She cheated on you, she betrayed your trust, she destroyed everything you had," "Yn, I can take care of you." The woman's mind was racing, her chest was hurting, all she wanted was to go back to the compound to talk to Natasha, but she heard Octavio's words: this is unforgivable. Natasha Romanoff had truly broken her heart.
She thought about Sophia, how their daughter would be with all this. She was just a child. "You can stay at my place for a while," "If it's not too much trouble, I can really rent a hotel room for the night," "I won't take no for an answer." "I'm thinking about Sophia," "Does she have someone to stay with?" "She's with Natasha's sister."
During the drive, Yn ended up falling asleep from exhaustion. Her phone was still vibrating with missed calls from Maria, Laura, and Clint. Octavio grabbed the phone and threw it out the window. Tomorrow, he would come up with a decent excuse for the woman beside him. At the moment, he was only focused on getting to the airport before anyone found out where he was taking her. Upon reaching the private section, he drove to where his jet was located. With a bribe, they didn't ask who the woman with him was. He carried her inside and laid her comfortably in an armchair. They were going to Malibu, where he had a mansion. His intention was to go to Tokyo, but he couldn't leave the country yet without Yn freaking out because of her daughter.
She woke up when he put her in his bed. "My beautiful one, you sleep very soundly."
"Where are we?" "My house in Malibu. You'll stay here until everything is resolved. Don't worry about Sophia, she's in good hands with her aunt," he said with a voice exuding authority. She rubbed her eyes lightly and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry for dragging you into this mess," "Yn, I just want to show you what truly makes you happy." Octavio approached and left a kiss on Yn's forehead, a tear rolled down the woman's cheek. "I know it hurts now, let me heal you." Yn opened her eyes and looked at him. He sat on the bed and placed a hand on Yn's jaw. Her heart rate increased, and she shook her head, denying him. "I need you, you don't understand, but one day you will understand." He closed the distance, connecting their lips and kissing her. She let out a frustrated sigh and tried to pull away. "I can't, I'm sorry, I can't do this to," "Can't do what she already did to you? Don't be a naive girl, she doesn't want you, she cheated on you, cheated on you pregnant with her baby, she doesn't care about you." Yn sighed, and another tear fell, but Octavio didn't care. He kissed her intensely. After a few seconds, she began to reciprocate. Octavio began to take off his clothes and tore Yn's dress from the back, leaving her only in pantiesâShe looked at him with a confused expression. The brunette left kisses all over Yn's body, touching his member, he fit it in and began to push. A moan of pain escaped the brunette's lips, but soon this pain was replaced by pleasure. A melancholic feeling, she began to cry as he pushed violently inside her. He left a kiss on her lips and bit her ear, he left her all marked, either with hickeys or his hand squeezing different parts of her body. When he was about to come, he pulled out of her and came all over her body, spreading the white liquid with his fingers all over the woman's body, even on her face. "I'll do everything to make you feel good," "You're mine."
After all that, he took her to the bathtub, and they took a bath. He gave Yn comfortable clothes, even though they were large on her. She managed to sleep once more.
Before lunch, he woke up to a call from Tony. "What did you do?" "Tell me it's a lie that you took Yn with you" "It's a lie," "Octavio, I'm not ready for your jokes now, what the fuck did you do?" "Tony, I didn't do anything, the one who did something was the little widow, ask her what she did," "You son of a bitch, where are you?" Natasha shouted in the background of the call, an irritated but frustrated scream. "Natasha, I'm taking very good care of your future ex-wife." Octavio hung up the phone and lay back down with Yn, who was still sleeping.
At the compound, Natasha called Yelena, telling her to take care of Sophia for a few more days because she had some important matters to resolve. When she woke up, she immediately explained everything that came to her mind to Clint and Laura. Maria was already in New York, preparing for a major mission for her task force. Natasha explained that she got drunk and couldn't tell the difference, that the girl was very similar to Yn. The three immediately considered the possibility that all this was planned, a girl with the same features as Yn. A quick search showed that she was from California, she wasn't Octavio's friend but an escort he hired.
She needed to know where Yn was. Clint located her cell phone, and the location was still near the compound, with a quick satellite search using Stark technology, they discovered it was in the middle of the road, already broken.
When Yn woke up, Octavio brought her breakfast in bed, pampering her the whole time. She felt terrible about everything, felt destroyed by the betrayal and for sleeping with Octavio. He showed concern the entire time. When they finished breakfast, he told her about the call with Tony, of course leaving out some details. Yn took Octavio's cell phone and sent an audio message to Tony saying that she needed some time away from everything, she only asked for a week for herself and that she would come back to see Sophia.
Yn spent the rest of the day in bed, with various feelings swirling through her body. She felt betrayed, she felt like almost ten years of her life meant nothing, she felt angry at herself for letting Natasha go to the bathroom alone, angry at Natasha for doing this to her, and angry at Octavio for bringing the girl as his companion to the party. Despite everything, she felt disgusted with herself for getting even, she had promised Natasha that Octavio was only a friend, she felt like an idiot for having sex while pregnant with someone else. Tears slowly streamed down her face, she closed her eyes tightly trying to clear the events from her mind, it was all too much for her.
Octavio was on the balcony sitting in a chair observing the view. He was satisfied with his deed. When he first saw Yn at Tony's party, he knew she had to be his, he didn't care how. He wasn't afraid of Natasha and took advantage of the opportunity he had. Following her, manipulating her with subtle questions about her daily life or personal life, slowly trying to win over Sophia. Now he had a destroyed Yn in his bed, just the way he wanted her so he could rebuild her in his own way. He stood up from the chair and walked to the bed, lay down next to the brunette and hugged her. Yn's body stiffened at the touch. "I only want to make you happy," Octavio whispered while stroking her. "I can make you so happy," a kiss was given on her neck, "I need to process all this, it's too much," he rolled his eyes and Yn took a deep breath. "Processing a betrayal must not be easy," another kiss on her jaw, "Especially an unexpected one from someone who never gave any signs, a selfish person who doesn't think about her daughter or the baby in her wife's belly." He turned Yn's body toward him and brushed the hair from her face. "I can help you with the divorce papers, I have the best lawyers in the world at my disposal," "I can't divorce Natasha, we have Sophia," "You can and you will," "I'm pregnant, she always wanted a family and I can't take that away from her."
He pulled away from her and got out of bed, fighting not to lose his patience. "Haven't you realized yet that she already destroyed all that last night when she slept with another woman?" "It was you who brought her to the party, who was she?" Yn began to raise her voice, her tone was distressed and desperate. "Now I'm the one to blame?" "When are you going to understand that I'm saving you from her? You should be grateful," he walked back to the bed where she was already sitting, he pulled her by the arms and brought her right in front of him. Yn blinked hard to hold back some tears and he squeezed her cheek with one hand while the other held her neck possessively. "Tomorrow my lawyer will file the divorce papers," he kissed her hungrily.
Yn spent the rest of the week in Malibu, he bought her a new cell phone where she talked every day with Sophia, who was now with Melina. She would have to return in a week and a half for a doctor's appointment. The divorce papers were almost ready, she wanted to talk to Natasha but Octavio said it was better for her to only talk when it was time to fight for Sophia's custody. Octavio had other plans, he didn't want any child getting in the way of his life, so he would try his best to make Natasha get full custody of Sophia and would try to get rid of the child Yn was carrying.
On the other side of the country, Natasha was still trying to contact Yn. She was notified by her lawyer that Yn had already filed for divorce. Yelena had to travel and Melina came to help with Sophia. They always overheard Yn's conversations with her daughter and the lies that she had to leave on a business trip, which the child didn't find strange since Natasha was always traveling for work. Yn had blocked Natasha's number after Octavio said it would be better for her, it was part of the healing process. The redhead was having a mix of feelings, anger at herself, guilt, sadness. She knew Octavio was behind all this but still had no way to prove it and despite all this she knew she was guilty for lowering her guard and cheating on her wife in a party bathroom.
News of a supposed breakup was spreading, gossip sites posted rumors of infidelity on Yn's part, others on Natasha's part, and some that the redhead had cheated on her pregnant wife. The Avengers' public relations team was trying to hush up the case and was slowly succeeding with stories from Tony related to charity.
When Natasha went to the compound or the tower, Melina stayed with her granddaughter who asked if something had happened because her schoolmates commented that her mothers were no longer together. Melina quickly steered the conversation to another topic. During the calls, Sophia asked Yn when she would return because she missed her mother so much.
Everything was still so confusing and relative for Yn. She returned to New York accompanied by Octavio after a week and a half of the incident. Natasha found out immediately when Melina called, informing her that Yn was at the house waiting for Sophia to return from school, stating that she was in the room she shared with Natasha packing her things. Melina noticed the tired look, the same look Natasha had been trying to hide all these days, she also noticed the look Octavio had for Yn, a look of possession.
In less than twenty minutes Natasha arrived at the house, entered quickly and saw Octavio sitting on the sofa and Melina in an armchair reading a book. She ran towards the man and climbed on top of him, first slapping him and then choking him. "What the fuck are you doing in my house?" He tried to break free from her grip but all his efforts were in vain. Melina left the book on the central table in the living room and crossed her legs, observing the scene in front of her with a subtle smile. Yn came down the stairs and was startled by what was happening, she ran toward Natasha and shook her, awkwardly trying to get her attention. Feeling Yn, Natasha released Octavio but not before delivering a final punch to his face. The redhead turned to her wife slowly, afraid of what might happen next, Yn pushed Natasha and went toward Octavio who was trying to catch his breath. Melina rolled her eyes and left the room, going to the house's garden.
After Yn practically begged, Octavio left her alone with Natasha for them to talk. Yn began to speak, she said she was at the house to pick up her things and resolve the issue of who would stay with Sophia during the days until final custody was resolved. She felt a pain in her chest, despite everything she wanted to throw herself into Natasha's arms and cry. Natasha was trying to be strong and maintain her composure. "Yn, forgive me," she said, trying to control the tears that threatened to fall, "I know what I did is unforgivable but all I ask for is a second chance," "You destroyed our family, Sophia will have to grow up without us together. We have a baby who won't have the experience of knowing what it's like to have a united family," "Please, Yn," "I need to heal and he is helping me." Natasha wanted to scream at Yn, to show her that he was manipulating her life but she couldn't without causing an exhausting fight.
After almost an hour and a half of conversation, they decided that Natasha would stay with Sophia during the week, Yn would pick her up from school and she would stay with her daughter on weekends. They talked about how to tell their daughter about everything, they would do it together after school. Octavio spent a good amount of time subtly manipulating with small, broken conversations so that Sophia would only spend the weekend with her mother. They also talked about the appointments, that Natasha would accompany her to all of them. With tears in their eyes, they said goodbye, the chest pain was present in both, despite everything Natasha would not give up on the family she fought so hard to build.
Yn's bags were taken to a penthouse with a beautiful view of Central Park. She would live with Octavio, it wasn't what she wanted but it was what Octavio said was best for her. She took her car from the house's garage and drove to her daughter's school, she was alone after a long time, since she had time before Sophia got out, Yn pulled over the car and started crying, remembering the conversation she had with Natasha who in a few weeks would be her ex-wife. She hated herself for still loving Natasha and trying to get over all this by going to live with Octavio. She picked up Sophia from school and took her to a small diner where the two stayed for hours talking.
After a lot of talking, Yn drove to the house. She was emotionally preparing herself to tell her daughter. Natasha was waiting in front of the house with a smile on her face. They went inside and sat in the living room. Natasha asked how her daughter's day was before changing the direction of the conversation. Sophia started crying when Natasha explained that Yn would no longer be living in the house but that the two of them would be together on weekends. Sophia, still crying, asked Yn to stay this night and watch a movie with her. The brunette agreed while Natasha took their daughter to take a bath.
In the middle of the movie, Yn's cell phone started ringing. She sighed a little when she saw who it was. She delicately took Sophia out of her arms and went to the kitchen to answer the call. "Where are you?" Otavio asked with a slightly elevated tone of voice. "Sophia asked me to stay for a bit. I promise I won't be long." "I want you to come home now." "But I'm with my daughter. I swear I won't be long," she started to become a little apprehensive. "Remember who really cares about you and doesn't hurt you," his voice came out strained with false compassion. "I'm leaving here."
Yn walked to the living room and saw a scene that warmed her heart, even though she was still hurt by Natasha. Sophia was sleeping in Natasha's arms. She started to tear up. She walked up to her daughter and left a kiss on her forehead. Natasha watched Yn's every move intently. "You don't have to go, we can fix things," she pleaded as a supplication. "Natasha, please, we already had this conversation earlier." The brunette let a tear roll down her face while the redhead continued, "Look into my eyes and tell me you don't want me." With that, Yn walked out the door and allowed the real tears to fall.
Melina entered the room minutes later. She looked at her daughter who was crying silently with Sophia in her arms, a scene that had become quite common lately. She picked up her granddaughter and took her to her room. Natasha allowed herself to completely break down when she was alone. All she wanted was to fix things. She wanted to hug her wife, who was no longer hers. She wanted to have everything back. Everything was happening so fast. Melina returned to the living room and hugged her daughter. Despite years apart, she was truly trying to be a maternal figure to the redhead. The elder realized that Yn was being manipulated. She had heard the call because she was sitting in the pool area, which is near the kitchen.
When Yn arrived at her new home, she was greeted with hot kisses. She could taste the drink on Otavio's lips and it sent a shiver down her body, one that was not good at all. Yn was going through a whirlwind of emotions, and all she needed was to lie down and rest. He led her to the bedroom where they had a beautiful view of Central Park. Her mind raced to the Sunday mornings, days that would no longer be complete. The kisses continued, and Yn tried to push him away and protest, but he was quite strong. After the third attempt, all she could do was accept the situation and look at it from another side, a side where he was helping her forget the pain Natasha was causing. But this did not prevent the tears from falling down her face. The smell of the drink was strong. An order was given and she obeyed with trembling hands. "Take off your clothes." The rest of the night passed in a blur: drink being thrown on her body, the grip on her neck, slaps on the face, and punches all over her body. It was different, it was violent.
The weeks went by and Otavio proved to be a caring man. He gave kisses, bought flowers and chocolates, and listened to Yn in everything. Subtly, he controlled everything. This made Yn feel loved in some way, but at night she felt dirty, but she didn't complain because she felt she owed it to him. She returned to her job at the tower. The agents stared at her with pity and others with a look of judgment. Maria tried to talk to her, but the answers were vague because Otavio always said that she didn't need anyone else when she already had him.
To keep an eye on Yn, he started picking up Sophia from school with her. The little girl didn't like him at all. He went crazy on appointment days because he couldn't enter the room with Yn and Natasha. During the appointments, Natasha tried to find out everything and capture details of Yn's life. They maintained a respectful atmosphere when they were together. When Sophia returned from the weekends, she tried to get some answers with the questions she asked. Sophia didn't like Otavio. For her, her mothers separated because of him, which was not untrue.
Three months passed. Yn became more depressed with each passing day, even having days when she couldn't get out of bed. Natasha was not radiant either. She still took advantage of the opportunities when she was alone with Yn, which was very little. She and Otavio somehow always ended up arguing and she had to control herself to avoid a physical fight. Otavio paid a magazine to post some details of the separation. To the world, Natasha Romanoff cheated on her pregnant wife and businessman Otavio Harrison was picking up the pieces of a broken heart. Every week that passed, he tried in some way to make Yn lose the child, either during sex or in moments that went unnoticed by her, such as putting a dose of medicine in her juice or vitamin. But he always took care so that Yn wouldn't end up dying with the child.
The divorce papers took no more than two weeks to be finalized. Natasha would keep the house, an apartment in Los Angeles, and a house in Norway. Yn would only keep the house in the Hamptons, which was her only request. They would divide the money, half for each, and both would help with the children financially. It took three months for Otavio to finally lose patience and take Yn to get Natasha to sign the papers. He left his girlfriend at their old house and waited outside. Sophia was at school.
Natasha seemed a little surprised by the presence of her wife and put a smile on her face, but when she saw Otavio in the car, her smile quickly disappeared. Yn entered and sat on the sofa. "We need to talk." Natasha sighed, already having an idea of what was coming next when she started pulling some papers out of her bag. "You are avoiding this, Natasha," she said, handing the papers to the redhead. "No, Yn, No." "Natasha..." "When are you going to realize that I still love you and that this is nothing but manipulation?" The redhead got up from the sofa and started walking around the room. "Nat, don't make this any more complicated." "It still hurts my soul," Yn said, letting tears fall. "You cheated on me, you destroyed our life." "Is that what he tells you every day?" "It's still true." "You didn't deny it," Natasha replied with an elevated voice. She was nervous and what she was about to say would destroy Yn even more. "Yn, I swear if I sign these papers, I will take Sophia from you. I will want full custody of her and our unborn child." The brunette got up and widened her eyes. "You wouldn't do that." Yn started crying even more, and Natasha tried to be strong. "I would, and if I do, I will win." "Natasha, you can't take my children from me." "I will protect our children from him." With that, Yn walked with heavy steps towards the door. Before opening it, she turned. "I want these papers in a week." "As soon as those papers are signed, you will no longer see Sophia on weekends." "You can't take that right away from me." With that, Yn opened the door and left the house, slamming the door with a force she never imagined, leaving Natasha crying in the living room.
Yn ran crying to the car. Otavio was genuinely concerned but happy to know the reason for the crying. He tried to calm his girlfriend, saying that he had a great team of lawyers and that Sophia would stay with her, as would the coming child.
a/n: requested on wattpad; love this concept but ill be honest, i donât love the way this turned out. part 2 might take a while lol
summary: stripper!Y/N, customer!nat; nat keeps coming back for more, lust turns into something deeper; Y/N kinda has a double life; your stage name here is ruby so donât let that confuse you lol, youâre still y/n privately
warnings: i know nothing about strippers/lap dances so those scenes might be atrocious âïžđ, suggestive topics, alcohol
word count: 9.3k
part 1, part 2
â· â· â· â· â· â· â· â· â· â· â· â·
It's not Natasha's idea. In fact, she fights tooth and nail in order to not go â when Tony suggests 'hitting the club' right after a mission, she recoils a little â, but it's hopeless. She's the only woman on the team, and now, she's being peer pressured into going to a strip club.
She's never been. Not for pleasure, that is, though missions have forced her to go a few times in the past. It just never appealed to her in that way. She doesn't see the purpose of sitting still for god knows how long, unable to touch, only allowed to look. Hooking up with someone always made more sense to her. But the pushier everyone becomes, the more she starts to consider it.
She could use an opportunity to wind down. Destress a little, just lean back with a drink and watch. It's no commitment, after all. She'll be back home in a couple hours.
"You're so uptight", Tony tells her. He's holding up a small mirror and cleaning the cut on his cheek. A minor injury he sustained in an accidental collision with a building. "Never been to a bachelorette party?"
"What do you think?", Natasha says, cocking her eyebrows.
"How sad. You haven't lived 'til you've tugged at a g-string."
"Guys, stop pressuring her", Steve says. "Not everyone is comfortable with objectifying young women. They're people too, you know."
"Snoozefest", Tony mutters. He glances at Natasha and wiggles his eyebrows. "You going? It'll make your little heart happy, I swear. Almost saw the gates of heaven the first time I went."
She tilts her head at him. The mission was hard â she can feel every muscle in her body ache. It'd be nice to think about something else for a while.
"They have alcohol?", she asks him to clarify.
"As much as your heart desires."
Natasha rolls her shoulders, her hands smoothing down her thighs. She's still wearing her suit, and she's all beaten up from the mission. Her head is pounding, her reluctance is clear, but she's tired in every sense. Finally, she sighs.
"I look rough", she says, getting up. "I'll have to, you know-"
"You don't need to look presentable", Tony says, glancing at Steve. "What about you, golden boy? You coming? Last time, you were blushing like a schoolboy."
They pull up in front of the strip club half an hour later. From the outside, the club is unassuming â a black building with a low-lit neon sign, complete with a bouncer out front and cigarette smoke in the air. Ubers stop on the side of the road to let groups of people, mostly men, out.
Natasha doesn't know what to expect. Despite having been to a strip club and even getting a full lap dance in the past, she doesn't know what it's like when the strippers themselves are the distraction. During her missions, she never focused on the dancers or the woman grinding on her lap. She was always too busy trying not to die. There's an obvious difference.
Inside the club, a bass thrums and alcohol flows. There are dollar bills everywhere â on the floor, the stage, wedged into bras. Perfume lingers in the air, not fully masking the smell of sweat. She keeps her hands in her pockets and her eyes on the ground. This is out of her comfort zone.
"VIP?", Tony yells. She glances at him and frowns. "You know. Extra one-on-one time."
She shrugs, then shakes her head. He nods and immediately leads them to the main stage. Behind her, Steve sighs. He's dying on the inside.
Beaded curtains, lights dimmed everywhere except for onstage, plush couches and armchairs. Glossy black stages scattered across the room, each complete with a chrome pole in the middle. Spotlights follow the dancers. Someone's pouring them drinks already â whiskey on the rocks, as far as Natasha can tell. Her instinct is to hightail it out of there.
"You look so tense", Tony says, snipping his fingers and plopping down into one of the armchairs. "Relax. Nothing you haven't seen before."
"You do this a lot?", she asks, sitting down as well. She runs her palms down her thighs, this time almost self-consciously. Black jeans, a leather jacket and a simple shirt. She wasn't sure how formal she wanted to be, so she tried to hit that golden mean.
The look he gives her says everything she needs to know. After ending things with Pepper, he's been here almost every weekend. Unlike Steve, who's shifting in his chair and scratching his neck. This might be his biggest nightmare come true.
Natasha tries to focus on the dancers, but her instincts run deep. She analyzes her surroundings instead â a bar in the back, a DJ booth in the corner. Bartenders in skimpy outfits run around, serving drinks and snacks. Everything is either neon red or black. She doesn't pay attention to the stage at all. Only when the DJ announces a dancer with the stage name Ruby does she snap out of it.
The bass drops. She looks at the stage, which is right in front of her this time. The dancer that's now gripping the pole is the first one who managed to catch her eye.
It's everything about you. The deep red lingerie set â bra, thongs, garters. The glitter body oil. The way your eyes find Natasha's.
You don't pause for her, but you stare right back. The stranger is intriguing. Never have you seen someone so desperate not to look while also staring like it's the last time they'll get the chance to.
Natasha grips the armrests of her chair and averts her gaze. You raise your eyebrows in response â is she chickening out already? â and twirl around the pole. You try to ignore her and instead climb a little. Hooking one leg around the pole, you let yourself drop.
For a split second, it looks like you're about to hit the ground. Natasha's breath hitches for some reason. Before she can jump up, though, you catch yourself just inches from the floor.
It took less than a minute. Natasha's hooked. She doesn't even hear the whistles and cheers around her. She watches you crawl across the stage, hips swaying, her focus never wavering.
At some point, you look up again. The light catches your eyes, and â maybe accidentally, maybe not â you look at her.
The moment passes way too quickly. You go back to the pole, lean against it with your thighs spread, slowly slide down it. One hand drags down your own body and your chest arches. Natasha swallows hard.
Right as your hand is about to dip between your inner thighs, an elbow knocks the air out of her. Natasha flinches and her head whips around. Spotting Tony, she shoots him a glare.
"Enjoying yourself?", he asks innocently.
Her cheeks flush slightly. An assassin, trained to keep a straight face even during the most intense situations. She's lied and tricked her way out of the hands of some of the most dangerous people on the planet. Yet, she's sitting here and blushing.
She shifts in her seat. "What's your issue, Stark?"
"I swear, I've never seen you this happy. Just wait 'til you get your first lap dance, you'll combust with euphoria."
She bites her tongue and keeps quiet. Her eyes flicker to the stage again â people are tossing dollar bills now. Some are even tucking them into your garters. One guy, hair oily and suit fitted, stares way too long. She pretends not to care.
Natasha doesn't know what's so intriguing. You're no different from any of the other dancers. She can acknowledge a pretty face, yes, and a nice body as well. She can see you continue to find her eyes in the middle of the room.
It's your job, however. You tease the audience, make them want more. Even lap dances are nothing else but controlled edging. Nothing about it is real, and she's spent too many years entertaining the things that are fake. She's not real, and neither are you. It's all business, all a strategy to make money.
Tony leans over and nudges her side. She briefly closes her eyes to compose herself.
"Jealous?", he asks, his voice sarcastic. "She's not up for purchase. Those times are past, I think."
Next to them, Steve nearly jumps off his chair backwards when a stripper walks up to him. Without his knowledge, he got ordered a full lap dance â and so did Natasha. Tony grins as two women come walking up to them, but neither of them is Ruby.
There's no telling what she would've done if it had been you approaching her. Maybe she'd have gotten the lap dance. Maybe she'd have stayed. But she's not interested in what's about to go down, so she grabs her whiskey, tosses it back and then gets up.
Outside, the air is cold. It contrasts with the heat of her skin. Natasha closes her leather jacket and stops by the trash cans to fumble for a cigarette. She rarely smokes, but tonight is calling for some nicotine.
Just as she's lit the cigarette between her fingers, a door closes nearby. Without thinking, she looks to her side â and nearly freezes. It's you, still in your lingerie set but with a coat thrown over your shoulders. Before you can spot her, she ducks behind a trash can.
When she looks up again, you're gone.
. . .
'The red one' â that's what Tony keeps calling you.
It's been days. Natasha's been keeping herself busy with her standard tasks. Training, debriefs, meetings, missions. It's life as usual. Still, something stays in the back of her mind. It smells like whiskey and cigarette smoke, thrums lowly like a bass.
She's trying not to think about what happened at the strip club. Nothing did happen, to be fair; it seemed like a regular night. All that happened is that she locked eyes with you once, and that somehow, her brain managed to interpret way too much into that one, way too brief moment.
It wasn't even an interaction. It was eye contact of the least intimate kind. But something about it made her believe you stared back. She's not dumb, however, and she knows you'll likely stare at anyone who pays you some extra attention. She can imagine it'd get you better tips, after all.
In the end, Natasha's nothing special. She's well aware of that, and trying to convince herself that this woman â Ruby â maybe did see something special is just delusion at its finest. So instead of listening to her instincts and going back to the strip club, she puts on her protective hand wraps and walks over to the punching bag.
The gym is empty for once. It's early in the evening, and everyone's either scattered around the building or out and about in the city. Natasha throws a few jabs at the punching bag before following with a cross. Twenty minutes later, she's sweaty and out of breath. Red baby hairs stick to her damp temples.
She doesn't stop. She's convinced she'll be able to stop herself from going back to the strip club. Deep down, she knows it's just a matter of time before she heads out again. She's always been obsessive, even if she'd never outright admit it.
So, at 6:47pm, Natasha makes her way to her car. She's wearing the same attire as the first time she went.
The moment she pulls out of the driveway, you step into the backstage area of the strip club.
You shrug off your coat and put it on one of the hooks right next to the door, simultaneously toeing off your boots. Elle, a coworker, walks in right after you and takes off her clothes as well.
"Hey", she says, to which you shoot her a brief smile. "Looking tired. You good?"
"I'm fine", you brush it off. "Midterms are next week. You know the drill. Haven't been sleeping enough."
"I can tell", she comments. You both make your way over to the racks of costumes, where you look at the different sets of lingerie to find what you'll wear tonight. "Bad for you, good for me. If you're slacking, the tips will end up in my wallet tonight."
You let out a short, forced laugh. You grab one of the red sets â a sparkly one this time â and decide on matching fishnets as well.
"You don't need those. Not with that one rich regular that keeps booking you. When's the wedding?"
Elle smirks and cocks her eyebrows. "You know the rules. No inappropriate relationships with customers."
"Well aware." You put some body oil on, rub it all over yourself to coat every inch of visible skin, then get into a pair of stilettos. Right on time â your boss comes in to call you up.
The club is more crowded than usual, thanks to it being a Friday night. Music is thrumming, people are getting lap dances. At the bar in the back, a woman orders a vodka sour. Her red hair is braided and stands out against the black leather jacket she's wearing.
It's familiar. She's familiar.
You try to ignore her. Your set is about to start, after all, and distractions usually end up affecting your performance. You can't risk your tips â you've got more than enough bills to pay.
Her eyes, however, stay glued to you. She sips on her drink, drums her fingers against the surface of the bar. Whenever you look, she averts her eyes. You notice it happening, even as the crowd of people surrounding the stage start tossing tips at you.
You force yourself to focus on your performance. Elle said it best â when you slack, it affects your tips. You can't risk that, not at the moment, not with the amount of responsibility you have. You hook your knee around the pole, lean back and arch. Dragging your body down the pole, you sprawl out on your back.
People whoop. Natasha clenches her jaw and quickly orders another drink. You're lifting your hips with the beat, one hand trailing up your stomach. She's cursing herself for ever showing up here again.
When she looks at you again, you're on your back with your knees folded beneath you. You get up in one, fluid motion, and your eyes immediately catch on the redhead at the bar. You stare one, two seconds too long, then turn back to the audience. Your lips part like you're about to smile, and Natasha's heart thumps against her ribs.
The performance ends. You get up, collect yourself, and blow a quick kiss before disappearing backstage. In total, you were onstage for about four minutes. To Natasha, it felt like forever. It still wasn't enough.
She stays rooted in place for a moment, clutching her empty drink and sweating. Finally, she jumps up and pushes past crowds of people. Some ignore her. Others complain or tease her loudly. She doesn't pay attention to either, as all she can focus on is the regret pooling in the depths of her stomach.
There's no reason for her to have returned to this place. Nothing about it should pull her in. It smells like alcohol and old sweat, mixed with the expensive perfumes of a specific group of people she'd rather not encounter unless absolutely necessary. Not even you, no matter your looks or performance, no matter how enticing or subtly flirty â not even you should make her seek out this place actively.
As Natasha leaves, she tells herself that this will find an end. She's staying away from the club from now on. Deep down, though, she knows it's only a matter of time.
. . .
It's no use. Natasha returns, and she keeps returning. Once, twice, until people start noticing. Soon enough, the bartender knows her order. The bouncer out front greets her by the fake name stated on her fake ID. She has her own little seat at the bar, her own armchair she occupies every now and then.
You notice, too. You lock eyes with her more often than you thought you would. Your curiosity grows each time you spot her in the crowd. You learn her habits â where she sits, what she orders, when she leaves. The moment your performance ends, she's ready to storm out. You never consider stopping her.
At some point, you're not the only one who notices her. Your boss thinks she's a stalker, but you brush that idea aside immediately. Elle, on the other hand, finds it amusing.
"It was about time", she tells you one night. You're outside, walking down the sidewalk towards the bus stop. Your car broke down two days ago, and you haven't managed to save up for the necessary repairs. "I'm telling you, it's like a rite of passage. You're not really one of us until you've gotten your own stalker."
"She's not a stalker", you correct her. You then hesitate. "Is she?"
Elle shrugs and glances at you. There's still some of that shimmering lipgloss on her mouth. "I don't know. You ever see her anywhere outside the club? Like, around your neighborhood?"
You shake your head. You've never seen her anywhere else â it's club only. Despite not needing it, you find reassurance in that fact.
"I feel like she avoids me, actually", you add. "She storms out early each time. She stays, like, five minutes total. It's odd."
"She leaves right after your performance", Elle says. "I noticed that as well. Wonder why she doesn't approach you."
There's an unofficial rule in the club â no going out with clients, no sexual favors, nothing exceeding the boundaries set by your boss. If it's not part of one of the bookable packages, you're not allowed to do it. You doubt the redhead is aware of that, though. Not many customers seem to be, at least judging by how often you and your coworkers have been hit on by greasy men.
You reach the bus stop. Shrugging, you reach for your phone and open the MTA app.
"Maybe she knows."
Elle snorts and gives you a pointed look. You roll your eyes and take a step forward when you see your bus in the near distance.
"You know she doesn't", she says. "None of them do. You think they care 'bout rules? Or boundaries? Hell, they're letting strangers ride them half naked."
"We don't 'ride' them", you interject. The bus stops, its doors slide open, and you get on. Luckily, your favorite seats â all the way in the front, close to both the driver and the door, are free. "It's a lap dance."
"You know what it looks like in their heads, though. They start coming by every weekend, then almost every day. You think they're aware of the difference?" She shakes her head. "Hell no. That's why they turn into stalkers."
"Again", you say, irritated, "she's not a stalker."
"You just say that 'cause she's a woman."
An unfair double standard to point out, but at the same time, it's a rational one. You roll your eyes and nudge her.
"You've seen the statistics", you point out. You quickly decide to change the subject â being reminded of stalkers and crazy customers never ends well for you. The nightmare-induced sleepless nights afterwards aren't something you can afford right now. "How are things going with Chris?"
Your plan works. The moment you mention her situationship slash boyfriend, her entire attitude changes, and she forgets all about the woman at the club.
You, however, don't. Elle keeps rambling, and you drift off. Only when the bus makes a halt at the stop in front of your apartment do you force yourself to snap out of it and get off. There's someone waiting for you at home, after all.
. . .
They notice. Natasha isn't sure how they manage that, but they do.
Maybe she should've been more careful. At the same time, she's not sure how â she's mastered stealth. She keeps everything private and locked down. She knows how to appear like everything is the same, even when it definitely isn't. Yet, the team figures it out.
"Told you you'd like it", Tony says, not bothering to be quiet about it. She doesn't react. "It's a treat, isn't it?"
"No idea what you're talking about", she says smoothly, pouring herself a cup of coffee.
"Strip club", he says. "You love it. That's why you keep coming back. What, you thought I wouldn't find out?"
Everyone else â Clint, Bruce, Steve â being in the same room as them only makes matters worse. Steve looks disappointed in her, like he just caught his daughter sneaking booze into her room. Clint just stares, unsure what to make of this. Bruce has gotten up to leave.
Natasha exhales, her fingers drumming against the countertop. Her eyes flicker over to him. "You're tracking me now?"
"No", he says, eyes lighting up. "That's not a bad idea. But no, I'm not tracking you. The owner told me. Nice lady, I think I made a friend."
"You don't have friends", she says flatly. She grabs her coffee and turns around. He raises his eyebrows.
"How sweet." Leaning back against the counter, he takes a sip of coffee and watches her sit down. "What's her name? Candy, Cherry? Or wait, is it the red one?"
It's like a trigger word. Suddenly, the only thing on Natasha's mind is you â red lingerie, garters, body shimmering and a little smirk on your lips. She clenches her jaw and leans back, dragging one hand down the side of her face.
"Shut the fuck up", she finally says. "You dragged me there. This is on you."
"You wanting a stripper is on you, though", he points out. "You could be less creepy about it, you know. At least book a lap dance instead of just staring like a horny idiot."
"Bad idea", Steve interrupts him. "It's their job. Don't let yourself engage with this...fantasy you have. It'll only make matters worse for you."
The word 'fantasy' probably describes this best. Natasha still doesn't know what she wants, or why she's this drawn to you. She could have anyone, so why fixate on this random woman?
"You're ruining the fun, Rodgers", Tony scoffs. He leans over the table and gives her a look. "At least give it a shot. Maybe it'll help you cool off."
"Oh, stop it."
"You know it's true. Get it out of your system, Romanoff. She'll get you all worked up, maybe you get to cop a feel or two-"
She shoots him a warning look. He grins, not bothered in the slightest.
"You're just scared", he finishes, tossing an apple into the air. "Big, bad Black Widow. Can't even get a fucking lap dance anymore."
She shakes her head. Footsteps can be heard as he walks around her. His hand clamps over her shoulder, and her grip on her cup tightens.
"It's just one lap dance", he says, almost like a threat. "I know you'll go back. You've been going back all this time. It'll happen anyway, so why fight it?"
Even years later, Natasha wouldn't be sure why he was so adamant about this. Maybe just to be a dick â as he tended to be â, or because of some unknown conspiracy.
Unfortunately, he ends up being right. Nobody likes being proven wrong by Tony Stark, especially not Natasha. She still ends up at the club, though, and it's just a few days later.
Her plan is to do exactly what he said â get it out of her system. That's what she usually does when she sees a woman she's attracted to. Have her in any way she can, whether that's a one night stand or a quick hookup behind a bar. This time, she's booking a VIP room to get it done.
The bouncer greets her by the fake name she gave him. The bartender nods at her and already holds up an empty glass to show he'll make her a drink. Elle, just about to leave the stage, spots her come in through the door.
"Redhead", Elle says, panting when she reaches the backstage area. You look up. "Redhead's back. Your stalker-"
"Not a stalker", you cut her off. Your friend waves a dismissive hand.
"Whatever. She's back. For you, I'm betting."
You don't argue. Instead, you grab your lipgloss and try to stay as composed as possible. You're called up next, so you check your appearance in the mirror one more time before stepping out.
It's the same as always. You perform and give it your all. You pretend to pay attention to the audience â reacting at the right moments is key, just like staying focused on the actual show is. Not looking at the woman in the back is a challenge. You can feel her eyes on you, though.
The song comes to an end. People whoop as you crawl towards the edge of the stage, dollar bills ready in their hands. They're tucked into your garters, thrown on the ground, stuffed into your bra. You give everyone a quick smile, nose scrunching, before turning around. All the redhead gets is a brief glance.
Backstage, it's bustling. Other girls run around as they get ready to be called up. Your boss is bawling someone out in the corner. Elle, about to go to one of the private rooms, salutes you.
"Good luck", she says, getting up. You give her a confused look. Before you can ask what she means, she's slipped into the dim hallway.
In the end, you don't have to ask. The floor manager, Katrina, comes running over, blonde locks bouncing, and pats your shoulder as she guides you to a less busy corner of the room.
"You just started your shift, right?", she asks. The moment you nod, she keeps talking. "A woman in VIP 2 booked you for one session. Said her name was confidential. It's all up to you, but-"
Your curiosity is immediate. You straighten up a little, head tilted and arms crossing in front of your chest. It's not the first time someone's booked you for a lap dance, but you have a feeling this one's a little different.
"VIP room?", you say. Her head dips in confirmation. "What does she look like?"
"Red hair", she says. "Black jacket. She's been a regular for a couple weeks now, maybe you've seen her before."
You have, obviously, but you don't feel the need to reveal that. Instead, you turn around and walk over to the rack of costumes. Lingerie and bodysuits in all colors of the rainbow, some sparkling, some adorned with lace. You stare at the fabric, contemplating silently.
Stalker, is what Elle keeps calling her. Whether that's true or not you can't tell. You've seen her around too many times, watched her leave right after your performance, noticed her avoid you. It's odd, and it's intriguing.
"Any specifics?"
Katrina taps one of the lingerie sets. "The red one", she says, taking a step back. "You have ten minutes."
It's the same lingerie sets you wore when you first saw her. Red, sparkling, leaving little to the imagination. The bra pushes your cleavage up, the body oil makes your skin smooth all over. Hair open and falling over your shoulders, you push open the door and step out.
Natasha's in the VIP room. It's dimmed, sensual, a bit quieter than the main area. Bead curtains separate the space. The lighting is red and low. She feels like she's dying, but at least the plush loveseat is comfortable.
Both of you consider cutting this short, though for very different reasons. You don't know what to expect from this woman who's been coming to the club to watch your performance specifically. Natasha fears that being this close to you, and alone with you, might just pull her deeper into this lust-fueled mess she's gotten herself into.
But then, it's too late. The curtain is pushed aside and you step in, making Natasha look up. Your eyes meet, and you immediately switch back to the professional side of yourself.
"Hey, pretty", you drawl, closing the curtain behind you without looking. "You look like someone I should take it easy on."
She stares at you, her arms crossed over her chest. She tries convincing herself that this is for the better â that it'll be over soon, and from that moment on, she'll be able to stop fixating on you like this. Just a quick lap dance. Get it out of her system, wind down, leave the club once and for all. Maybe she'll hook up with someone who's actually attainable.
"Very considerate", she says, shifting slightly. "What do I get if I survive?"
You hum, circling the loveseat. Your fingers trace the backrest, barely grazing the back of her neck. Natasha stiffens. She tries not to let it show, but her skin is aflame and heat is shooting through her like a 9mm shotgun. It's desire, lust. It expires easily. Or so she thinks.
"I'm sure you have something in mind", you say. Your fingers run down her arm as you step in front of her again, and she exhales quietly. "What's your name, gorgeous?"
Natasha hesitates. She's been using a fake name ever since coming here the first time. Logically, she should also do that with you.
"Natasha", she says. You give her a wicked little smile at that, but your heart is pounding.
"Very fitting", you mumble, slowly moving to straddle her lap. Music has started playing, the lights seem to be pulsating. She uncrosses her arms and puts her hands down next to her thighs. "I'm Ruby. Pleasure to meet you."
You keep some weight in your legs, just so you're not fully sitting on her thighs. Instead, it's a slight grinding motion, with your hands resting on her shoulders. It's enough to drive her insane. Every scenario she can imagine where a girl would sit on her lap like this, she'd buck her hips a few times.
No touching, she reminds herself when her fingers twitch. There's music â muffled, playing in the main area of the club â but it's quiet enough for her to hear every breath, every slight shift of your knees on the couch.
"You look so tense", you mumble, noticing her stiff posture. "What's the matter?"
Your hips shift, and her thighs flex. You smile and trail your fingers down her chest, tapping gently. She's putting on a soldier front â eyes locked, jaw clenched, trying her best to look unaffected. You haven't seen this look in many customers before. You don't mind it.
"I don't usually do this", she finally says, hands balling into fists. She's still trying not to put her hands on your waist.
"I don't mind, baby", you say. You lean in, almost like you're going to kiss her, and trail one hand down to the waistband of her jeans. Her hand twitches. "Touching's extra, pretty girl."
Her mouth opens, but the music dips, and so your grinding slows down. Natasha feels hot all over. When you cup her jaw to make her look you in the eyes, she starts losing ground.
"...fuck", she mutters, throat bobbing and an exhale slipping through her nose.
"Don't hold your breath", you say, pulling away just when it gets heated. You turn around to straddle her knee backwards. "I want to hear you. It's a bit of a reward."
At this point, Natasha's thoughts are running wild. She's starting to understand why people enjoy this â it's like slow, controlled edging. Everything feels dialed up. She can feel your heat through her clothes, smell the body oil you put on, the subtle scent of vanilla. Her whole nervous system has lit up. Blood is rushing, her muscles twitch, and there's this urge to touch you she can't give into.
She can't even see your face now. Instead, it's the curve of your back, your hair spilling, your ass grinding into her thigh. Humiliation and desperation roll into one when her eyes flicker downwards. You feel her staring, and it only makes your pulse spike even more.
"Eyes on me", you say when she looks away. You glance at her over your shoulder, watching her bite the insides of her cheeks. "Don't get shy now. You asked for this, didn't you?"
Natasha almost combusts. This time, her hands actually leave the plush fabric of the loveseat â her thumb nearly grazes your thigh â before she remembers the rules. Only the stripper is allowed to touch.
"You like testing people, huh?", she mutters, fingers curling into the seat of the couch.
"It's my job, pretty." You get up and turn around, putting your hands on her shoulders again. You drag your chest down her front, making her go face to face with it. She nearly groans. "You're not doing too bad. This is your first time?"
"How'd you guess?", she replies, shifting. A half lie â it isn't her first time, but it's the first time she booked it for pleasure instead of business.
"There's something special about you", you coo, tipping up her chin. You're close enough to kiss, but you pull away last second. You go back to straddling her lap instead, immediately rolling your hips. "Don't know what it is."
Natasha forces a dry smile. "How many people have you said this to?"
Way too many. You tilt your head but don't say anything. Your hips press down harder against her, and she almost lets a moan slip.
Everything you do is part of your stripper-persona. You know that, and so does Natasha. She lets herself believe otherwise, anyway, even if it's just for a brief moment. Lust battles rationality, and unfortunately, it's winning at the moment.
She looks at you, her mouth dry and her blood rushing through her body. You're gorgeous â she doesn't know which part of you to look at first. Before she can decide on one, though, the session ends. You finish with your lips ghosting her jaw, then you slowly pull away. She's left behind stunned and no less aroused than she was earlier.
"You're very professional", she manages to say. You glance at her and smile faintly.
"Is that a good thing?", you tease, one hand already pushing aside the curtain. She shrugs. "Don't answer. I think I can guess."
"Don't know about that", Natasha mutters. You wink at her and leave, the curtain swinging behind you. Your scent â vanilla, body oil â lingers all over her.
Her plan was to get it out of her system. Unwind. Nothing more, nothing less. Instead, you've managed to imprint yourself into her brain like you just hot branded her.
Natasha shouldn't think this, and she tries not to. It's not like she's proud of it, after all. But as she steps out of the club and into the colder night air, she knows she'll be back.
. . .
Two days. That's how long she lasts before in your chair again. And from that moment on, it happens time after time.
It's never the same. The more often you see her, the more you start switching up your costumes and performances. The only things that stay the same are your perfume, the body oil you use, and you. And as her visits become more frequent, the more you'll be able to predict when she'll show up again.
Four times. That's how often she's booked you for a lap dance so far â you specifically. You start subtly asking your colleagues about her, but none of them seem to know about her. Only Elle does, but you avoid talking to her about Natasha.
The fifth time happens on a Friday night. Natasha returns from a mission and goes straight to the club. She doesn't acknowledge the looks exchanged by the team at all â she has one goal, one thought stuck in her one track mind, and the judgmental glance directed at her by Steve doesn't faze her at all anymore.
She's a regular now. To you she is, at least. The moment Katrina taps your shoulder, you know what's going on.
"Natasha?", you ask, already grabbing your favorite lingerie set. Her favorite, too. You've noticed the way she stares at it.
"VIP room 6 today." Katrina raises her eyebrows, the look on her face almost wary. "Been seeing quite a lot of her lately, haven't you?"
You shrug, but silently, you pray she won't keep pushing. Clubs reserve the right to deny people service for whatever reason. If Katrina gets a bad feeling about Natasha â even if it's unjustified â, she might be asked to not return.
"It's stress relief", you lie. "Did she request anything?"
"Only you", she says, taking a step back. "Be careful, alright?"
"I know what I'm doing", you mutter, reaching for your usual perfume. You get changed, apply everything as usual, and then make your way to the VIP room.
When Natasha looks up, she pauses. Something's different. You look more tired than usual, so much so that you can't even conceal it with makeup. You raise your eyebrows at her and try to hide it, anyway. Not everyone needs to now you were kept up all night.
"Look at that", you hum, stepping closer. "My favorite customer."
She tilts her head. At this point, you've both found a rhythm, and it shows. But Natasha is worried even though she doesn't want to be, so by the time you get off her lap again, she hesitates.
"You alright?", she finally asks. You're already on your way out. Usually, you wouldn't pause for a customer, but for some reason, you do this time.
"I'm good", you lie. "Don't worry."
"I'm not worried", she quickly retorts. You freeze, and she finds herself regretting her way too sharp reply. "I don't know. You seem off."
You bristle at her words. She's tiptoeing that line between professional and personal, and you're being tugged along. You've dealt with this kind of behavior before â handsy customers, overly confident men, flirty remarks that definitely went too far. But you don't mind her going too far for some reason, and that only makes you push her away more.
"Oh, I'm sorry", you bite back, pulling the curtain aside. Beats clack quietly. "Hope it didn't affect my performance. Have a nice night, Natasha."
"No", she says, getting up right as you leave. "I didn't..."
You don't turn around. There's this little voice in her head telling her to follow you, but she knows all about the club's â and the dancers' â boundaries. She won't overstep them. Not any more than she already has. Instead, she grabs her wallet and makes her way outside.
It's a mistake on your part. Your shift has ended, it's late, and you need to get back home before you get a phone call from your sister again. You tighten the coat around your body and step out through the side door, unknowing that Natasha is right across from you.
You stop and stare. She's leaning against her car, arms crossed and staring at nothing in particular. You wait for too long. By the time you even start questioning whether you should leave or approach her, she's already spotted you. It takes her a minute to say something, though.
"I crossed a line", Natasha says. "I'm sorry."
"You did", you say, not bothering to sugarcoat it. You feel bad about it, anyway. "It's nice you asked. I guess."
She gives you a brief smile. "You're sure you're okay, though? You seem tired."
You hesitate. How much can you tell her? How much do you want to tell her? She's a customer, after all. Boundaries exist for a reason. You've started to question those, though, especially when you consider how often you see her at this point.
"I'm just busy", you say. "Really busy. I feel like I can't catch a break right now. Should get better soon, I hope."
"Let me know if I can do anything."
"Tips help", you tease, trying to distract her from how the mood shifted. It'd always been easy between you â heated, flirty in a not quite professional sense. But the closer she's getting to you, the more anxious you get. You're not in a place in your life where you can deal with this.
"I feel like I've contributed quite a bit of those", she replies, smirking faintly. You raise your eyebrows at her. "Come on. You see me all the time. I bet I'm the one who got you that coat. Looks new, too."
Despite everything, you laugh. It's a sound that cuts through Natasha's skin in the best way. She shuts up immediately, her eyes fixated solely on you.
"If you like me that much, why not book a private session?", you say, tilting your head at her. She scoffs, cheeks flushing. "Hey, if you can cross lines, then so can I."
Natasha rubs the back of her neck, green eyes darting down. She stares at a cigarette butt to try and hide the look on her face. She's suppressing a smile.
"I apologized", she says. "Whether I meant it is a different story."
"Alright, hotshot."
"Only for you."
That makes you both pause and, to your disappointment, snap you back into reality. You're outside in near freezing weather, with only fishnets covering your legs. You're standing there, laughing (and flirting) with someone you should ignore outside the club. And the worst part is that you're liking it a lot more than you should.
You shift and exhale, your breath visible in the cold weather. It's getting late as well. You need to go home.
"Thank you", you say, then gesture awkwardly. "For this, I mean. It's nice you checked in."
Natasha nods, already turning around to open the car door. "Least I can do."
You smile and step away, but you watch her for a beat longer than you should. You can't help it.
"Goodnight", you say. The next words follow without thinking. "See you."
You wait until she's pulled out of the parking lot. Once she's gone, you take a bus home. Not much happens, which is a relief â the streets of New York City are always unpredictable, but especially at night. But you make it to your apartment safe and sound, and when you open the door, you can hear the tv play.
Sighing, you walk into the living room. The tv is on, cartoons are playing and your daughter is wrapped into a blanket. Next to her, your sister is dozing.
"Grace", you whisper. Her head whips around and she gasps. "Why are you still awake?"
"Mommy", she just squeals, scrambling off the couch and running straight into your arms. You pick her up and kiss her cheek. "You're cold."
"Yeah, I'm cold. It's freezing outside, bub."
On the couch, your sister stirs. She rubs her eyes, looks up, and then almost shrinks with guilt. Grace's bedtime is 7:30. Considering it's past midnight now, she definitely messed up here.
"Why is she awake?", you question her next. "She has daycare tomorrow!"
"I'm sick", your daughter promptly says. She makes grabby hands and you give her your hand, which she presses to her forehead. "See?"
"You are warm", you admit. "Mel, why is she not in bed?"
Melanie shrugs and gets up. "She was in bed. Must've slipped out when I nodded off."
"I'm sick", Grace insists. "I want tea, mommy."
You look at her and soften. You know she's probably just looking for an excuse to stay up â but you've been seeing so little of her you can't even blame her. Sighing, you kiss her cheek and carry her into the kitchen.
A cup of tea and a few saltines later, you tuck her into bed. She gives you a defiant little look, but you cup her face and kiss her forehead.
"All comfy?", you ask, patting the blanket down to straighten it. She nods her head.
"Yes. I'm comfy. Do I have to sleep?"
"You do", you insist. "It's way too late, honey. You're sleepy, I can tell by your yawning."
Grace pouts, but ultimately surrenders. Curling into her blankets, she closes her eyes.
Turning to stripping wasn't a choice. Not fully. You are working towards a future by being a college student â but to support your present, you needed to find something else.
It doesn't pay great. The tips are mainly what keep your ship from sinking. But your shifts are doable, there's not much thinking happening, and on good nights, you earn more than you would in any of the other jobs you considered.
Does it fulfill you? Not really. It's only a means to an end. Something meant to get you to a point in life where things get easier. But now you met Natasha, and you have the feeling that quite the opposite is about to occur.
. . .
"You never told me what you do", you say, getting off her lap and tucking your hair behind your ears. She smooths her hands down her thighs. "I mean, unless that's confidential too, Fanny."
Natasha flushes slightly, her eyebrows raised in silent warning. "Who told you about that?"
"What, you thought I wouldn't find out about your fake name?" You grin and lean over the back of the loveseat, tilting your head to look at her. She rolls her eyes. "You know, I could get you kicked out for that."
"I highly doubt that."
"Yeah, I probably couldn't." You pause and study her. "But seriously. What do you do?"
Natasha doesn't understand why you're suddenly so interested in her. She has no idea that this interest isn't sudden, though â it's been building up from that very first night she entered the strip club, from that very moment your eyes met hers from the main stage.
"Guess", she finally says. You frown and pinch her arm. "I can't just tell you."
"You know what my job is, though."
The look you get makes you grin. It's rare that you get along this easily with a customer, or that you stay a few minutes extra after just to chat. Honestly, you don't remember ever doing that. She's the only one.
Unfortunately, your smile lowers her defenses. She clenches her jaw and picks at her jeans. Despite her pretty public persona, not everyone knows who she is. She likes it this way. She's revealing it to you piece by piece.
"Security", she mutters, looking at you. "Contract work. That kind of stuff."
You scoff, and she can tell you don't believe her. Not fully, anyway. Her answer wasn't a lie, but it was vague enough to make you skeptical.
"Like, a security guard?" You squeeze her bicep and she falters. "Oh wow, I had no idea you're ripped."
Natasha gives you a deadpan look, not saying anything. You laugh, your face way too close to hers, but quickly stop when someone pushes the curtain aside. You look up to see Katrina, who's staring like she just witnessed a warcrime.
"Hey", you say, dumbfounded, and straighten up. "I'm sorry, we were just- I mean, I was finishing up. We're done here."
"The session ended ten minutes ago", she tells you. You exhale quietly. "The next customer is waiting. Do you mind?"
"Sorry", you apologize, stepping around her. Natasha jumps up to follow you out of there. "Won't happen again, Kat."
"It better not", she calls after you. With a shake of her head, she starts freshening up the room for the next session.
You slip through the hallway, making your way past coworkers and customers. Natasha is still behind you, her eyes fixated on you like you're a moving target. Before you can walk into the backstage area, though, you stop. She looks up and flushes.
"Restricted access", you tease. She glares at you. "You know, looking where you're going helps."
"I was distracted."
"Oh, I know. You always are." You tilt your head and smile. "See you Friday?"
Natasha narrows her eyes at you. Not waiting for a reply, you shoot her a smile and let the door fall shut after you.
Friday. She doesn't want to wait until Friday. She doesn't want to keep this up â this whole thing of pretending that she can keep this professional. It isn't working.
She hesitates for a good moment, then she storms out of the club and makes her way around the building, spotting the back door. The area is barely lit, but she can still see you exit a couple minutes later.
You look more like yourself again. A coat, knee high boots, hair loosely clipped back. You look up and spot her. Suddenly, she's less convinced she can do this.
"Hey", she says. You raise your eyebrows at her.
"Everything alright?"
"Yeah", she says, tucking her hands into her pockets. She's sweating already, and judging by the way she's floundering, she might chicken out after all. "I just think...what's your schedule again next week?"
"The same as always", you say, digging through your purse. Natasha spots a small picture book for kids and frowns, but you quickly push it back inside. "You know my schedule doesn't change."
"Right", she says, dumbfounded. She rubs her temple. "Alright, uhm..."
Natasha doesn't remember the last time she asked someone out. In addition, she's never asked out a stripper â and she has no idea how to go about that. You give her a look that's both confused and amused.
"Yeah?"
"Thank you for tonight", she finally says. "I enjoyed it."
You nod, stepping closer. She stays rooted in place, her heart beating faster the closer you come. For a moment, you just stare at each other, then you exhale softly and step aside. She has to force herself from deflating visibly.
It's a defense mechanism. You can tell you've been getting too close, and if you don't draw a line, you'll end up cracking. You can't allow yourself to let someone into your life like this â not when so much depends on this job. You can't afford to let Natasha disrupt your precarious balance of a life. And yet, she already has.
"Good night", you say. This time, it's final, and you turn around and leave.
. . .
There are three different layers to a strip club. They're similar in some ways, and drastically different in others.
The main floor is where fantasies exist, but always stay out of reach. It's merely a performance, public and untouchable, but it lays the groundwork for everything else.
The VIP rooms are more intimate, but still operate with fantasies â nothing more, nothing less. Lines blur, things start to feel real, and you're tricked into believing there might be more. Natasha hasn't dared to go further than this yet.
Then, there are the private rooms. They're hidden all the way in the back, with actual doors instead of beaded curtains separating them from the rest of the space. People who book these rooms want the kind of fake intimacy that feels raw. They're not interested in letting a fantasy stay a fantasy.
In the end, it all depends on the dancer. The customer doesn't have much of a say at all. There are security cameras, of course, as well as a concealed second entrance to make sure someone can intervene at all times. And usually, what's fake stays fake â but when you hear Natasha booked you for a private room, you can feel the line between professionalism and real intimacy blur more and more.
Your thighs cage in her hips. Cupping her face, you push yourself off her lap and roll your hips down against hers. You're both out of breath at this point, sweat dripping down your neck. What you're doing isn't even physically demanding, it's just that you're constantly holding back from wiping away that blurred line entirely.
There's more weight to the dance this time. It feels less like a performance. Noticing that makes your head spin.
"Not so different from the VIP rooms, huh?", you mumble. Her fingers brush your thighs. "You can almost pretend it's real."
"'Pretend'?", she replies. You raise your eyebrows at her. "Maybe I don't have to do that."
You let out a quiet laugh, pretending her words didn't faze you. Your thumb brushes along her jaw, from one ear to the other, until it eventually stops at her chin. You glance at her lips and exhale, then push your thumb against them.
It's highly unprofessional. You both know it. But your heart is beating way too fast, and the way you've been leaning against her with your full body weight almost crosses that line as well, so your inhibitions are lowered.
You lean in, press your lips against hers, and let her taste the lipgloss on your mouth. It's flavored. For the first time, she lifts her hands and grabs your thighs. Your hands move down her chest and start toying with the buttons of her blouse. Your hips roll down against hers.
Natasha feels your tongue slip between her lips. When she stills, you finally realize that you've fucked up badly.
"Shit", you whisper, pulling away. She's trying to catch her breath. "You actually kissed me back."
The panic you're feeling is evident. Up until now, you had control. You knew what you were doing. You were staying professional despite the cracks appearing in your polished reputation. But now, you've done the one thing that could get you fired and make you lose everything. In addition, you're making her believe there could ever be more â which isn't the case.
There are two ways that you could go about this. Either you tell her that it's all a mistake, or you make her believe it's all part of the performance. Part of a test too, maybe. You picked the latter.
Natasha frowns and sits up. She puts her hand on your back â just a light touch, meant to ground herself in reality.
"What?", she asks, taken aback. You give her a teasing smile, but your heart is racing in your chest.
"Didn't think you'd go through with it, champ. Are you that easy?"
It's all damage control. You're trying to save that last bit of professionalism left in you from evaporating completely. If you let her see that, despite the rules and ethics of this place, you've still developed feelings that definitely cross a line, you'll never live it down.
She blinks at you. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"It's part of the performance, dummy." You pat her cheek and slide off her lap. She scoffs. "Who do you think I am? A prostitute? I'm not going to fuck you just because you paid for the private room."
"You're insane", she says, forcing her face to stay neutral. You tilt your head at her. "Why in the world would I think of you like that?"
You shrug and grab your high heels, which you slipped off while climbing onto her lap. Your heart feels like it's about to jump out of your chest.
"There's one rule, Natasha", you say, putting on one of the heels. "One that's important for you. It's not touching the dancer. So either you see me as something you can buy, or you're starting to actually like me. Guess what? Both are unacceptable."
You don't listen to her. In fact, you don't even let her talk. Instead, all you hear is the door falling shut behind you.
Summary: Natasha Romanoff, learner of New Yorkâs most infamous mob, goes on a night out looking for a little stress relief.
Warnings: Minors DNI, Smut, fingering, oral, unprotected sex, Natasha has a dick, dry humping, strip club, erotic dancing. Daddy kink. Choking kink. Praise kink. Overstimulation. Slight dub con I think. This is mostly filth Iâll be so honest.
Natasha Romanoff, one of the more well known gang leaders in New York city, understandably has a stressful life. She can deal with it, has become so well adjusted to it she barely takes much notice anymore.
But on certain days tension will not leave her body, her mind refusing to quiet. On those days, Natasah becomes more snappy than usual, her tolerance for mistakes nowhere to be found. It made her own life harder, along with the lives of anyone whoâd be brave enough to be in her presence.
To combat this, Natashaâs right hand man, Clint, had suggested she and her gang have a weekly âdestress outingâ. His pitch was that it would improve work relations and morale. A happy worker is a productive worker, heâd said with a smirk. Really, he could just see how tightly wound up his friend was and wanted to help. That and he also thought it would be fun. Two birds, one stone.
Usually they would go to Natashaâs favourite spot, the wandering widow. Tonight however, when the group of thugs arrived at the well frequented venue, they found it closed. Natasha did her best to contain her frustration, finding the thought of missing her one time in a week to actually destress, quite distressing. Funny, she thinks to herself, but finding no murmur in it at all.
Tilting her head back she lets out a groan, prompting her right hand man to whip out his phone for a quick google search. Thankfully he found a five star strip club, no less than a ten minute walk away. No one wants to be dealing with a cranky Natasha for the next week. They begin the journey with little to no complaints, seeing as this particular club, the bittersuite, comes with the promise of added services if only the right price is paid.
Natasha enters the building ahead of the group, leading them inside with practiced confidence. In one quick moment she takes in everything in her surroundings, the bar, the stage, the booths pressed against the back walls, the music to fit the atmosphere. Everything seemed perfect for the night they all had in mind.
As she scans the room her dark green eyes land on you, scantily clad in black lace lingeries, the bra fitting perfectly around your breast, covering you enough to keep you just under the line of modesty but still having it be revealing and alluring. Your matching panties leave little to the imagination, shaping your ass heavily, black heels to complement the look.
Natasha feels her mouth water, letting her eyes drift over you and swallows hard. Clint nudges her shoulder and nods towards a booth in the back, close enough to the stage they can see, far enough away they wonât be bothered. She nods her approval and follows the man to the booth, temporarily losing track of you.
It isnât hard to find you again in the packed room, your charming smile and laugh paired with your sparkling eyes drawing Natasha in more than she thought she would be. She watches you as you move throughout the room working the crowd as you go. She orders herself a drink, sipping away as she follows you with her eyes, readily ignoring anyone else around her.
You seem genuinely interested in the people youâre talking to. Friendly, open posture, polite smiles, even a hint of genuine laughter.
Itâs the way you squeeze a person's forearm every so often that lets Natasha know most of it is an act, a facade all in the effort of getting more tips while performing. She has to applaud you on your efforts, seeing for herself, even across the room, that youâre very good at what you do.
The music for your intro starts and Natasha watches with keen interest as you bid your goodbyes to the people youâre speaking with and make your way up to the stage.
You move confidently to the beat of the music, with the skill and beauty to back it up. Each and every pair of eyes in the room is glued to you, the way your body sways and grinds to the music.
About half way through the song you make it down on your hands and knees on the stage, pausing for a second to flash a smile at the audience before dipping your chest towards the stage, revealing more of your cleavage to them.
An audible groan sounds around the room, your eyes snapping up when you hear it. Coincidentally, or fated by the gods, your eyes lock with those of a red haired gang leader sitting in the back booth.
Sheâs stunning, possibly the most beautiful woman youâve ever seen. Her wavy red hair rests hotly around her shoulders, a stark contrast to the plane white shirt left all but half open covering her body. Your eyes trail to her pants clad legs before moving to her face, revealing green eyes swimming in lust.
She notices the look of pure awe on your face and smirks, lifting her whisky glass to you.
You keep your eyes on hers as you drop your chest slowly toward the stage, lifting your ass teasingly in the air before sliding the whole way down and kick rolling yourself into a standing position to finish out the performance.
The song ends and Natasha watches as you make your way off the stage, a cute blush adorning your face as cheers and wolf whistles are heard throughout the whole room. She watches as you make your way towards a blond woman, her arms open and waiting for you to step into. You hug her and take a step back, keeping yourself at a respectful distance.
Her eyes stay fixed to you as the woman flirts with you, as you act all shy and affected by her words. Natasha can tell itâs all fake, just more of you trying to earn your money, working for it, so she allows it, until the blond woman leans in the whisper in your ear and gestures towards the back room.
Now that Natasha canât have, not after you made her as hard as you did. No one else would be touching you tonight but her, sheâd be making sure of that.
She stands, downing the rest of her drink in one go and making her way swiftly toward you. You donât flinch when you feel her hand on your back, nor do you pull away, you simply flick your eyes toward her, an easy, sultry smile sliding onto your face when you see her.
You keep your body angled toward the blond woman and you can see that clearly pisses her off. But Carol is one of your highest paying clients and youâre not about to fuck that up for this woman, no matter how hot the red head is.
She slides her arm around you, leaning in close enough for you to hear her mumble hotly against your ear. âThat was quite the performance, sweetheart.â Natasha takes note of your body language and smirks, finding your self assurance amusing, she knows youâre still playing the game, still working the room.
âHow about an encore, just the two of us.â She suggests boldly, not caring who hears her, or for the blond woman who seems to be annoyed by her words.
âActually.â The blond buts in, Natashaâs jaw clenching at the interruption.. âY/n and I were just about to-â
âY/n.â Natasha cuts her off, her eyes never leaving you. âWould make more money with me in an hour than she would with you in months.â
This catches your attention, your body turning slightly toward Natasha as you level her with a look of pure curiosity.
âHow would you even know what I pay her?â Carol interjects, annoyance and indignity clear in her voice.
Without hesitating Natasha pulls a cool million out of her pocket, flashing it to not just Carol but to you too. You see the large amount of money and feel your knees go weak. That could set you up for months.
âWell? What do you say, sweetheart?â Natasha asks, keeping the wad of cash clear in your view, a teasing smirk on her face.
You turn to Carol, your eyes pleading for understanding. âIâm sorry.â You say, a hint of shock in your voice. âI canât pass this up.â
Carol scoffs and walks away angrily, knowing she canât compete with Natasha financially.
Natasha smirks and wraps her arms around your waist, pulling your body flush with hers, a lustful look in her eyes. âSmart choice, sweetheart.â
You smile up at her, your eyes narrowed slightly at her cocky confidence. She may have the money to get your attention but that doesnât mean sheâll be any good with your time.
Feeling the sudden need to knock her down a few pegs you gently lean up to press a kiss to her cheek and trail your lips across to her ear, missing the way her eyes flutter shut for a second as you whisper.
âSee that body guard over there?â Natasha nods, her eyes now locked on the body builder of a man standing next to the exit door. âIf you stiff me heâll break your legs, he wonât care that youâre a woman.â
Natasha swallows, the idea of broken legs not a pleasant one, but still, she wouldnât never take what youâre offering and leave without paying.
You pull away from her then, a teasing glint in your eyes. âHeâs a real feminist like that.â
Natasha takes a deep breath, trying to quickly regain composure as she smirks. âIf you feel even half as good as you look then I say money well spent, sweetheart.â
You smile, skeptically, at the older woman and blush. She really has a way with words. You just hope sheâs got the skill to go with it. That, and you really hope you didnât just ditch one of your best paying clients for someone who wonât pay their debts.
Carol was a mediocre fuck at best, but at least she always payed well. You take the red heads hand in your own and turn towards the back rooms, pulling her along behind you as you go.
You nod to the bouncer guarding the door, his eyes scanning Natasha and looking to you for another nod of approval before opening the doors for you both. Once inside your designated room you lead Natasha inside and lock the door.
You turn back to the red head, already sitting on the bed with a tent in her pants and smile. âCome here baby.â She gently commands, patting her lap.
You make your way over to her slowly, an intentional but subtle sway in your hips as you go. Your eyes glance down at the bulge in her pants, bigger than youâve seen in a while. Your mouth waters. Maybe tonight you wonât have to fake an organism.
Your eyes move up to her green ones, the smirk on her face doubled in size as she clocks where your eyes had been.
She pats her lap again, this time reaching a hang out for you to take as she guides you onto her lap.
Her mouth waters at the weight of you on top of her concealed bulge. Her hands fall to your hips and her head to your shoulder as she guides your hips over her hard on, her hips ever so slightly lifting to meet yours as she groans.
You fight the urge to laugh, a poor attempt you realise she stills lifting her gaze to meet yours with a quizzical look.
âIâm sorry.â You say, somewhat sincerely. âI just- I didnât think youâd want to use our time in here like this⊠with you coming in your pants.â
Natasha releases a breath, one of her hands coming up to move a stray piece of hair from your face. âOh baby.â She whispers. âIâm going to have you in every way imaginable. This is just the start.â
Your breath catches in your throat. Usually when clients asked for your time in a private room they just wanted to cum. Once, maybe twice, rarely ever a third time. It hadnât occurred to you that she might have any better stamina than the other people you took back here. But apparently you were wrong because judging by the way sheâs looking at you right now sheâs going to be fucking you till the sun comes up.
âPlus.â She adds, quietly. âI have no shame about how badly I want you. You make me feel desperate.â She says, her eyes drinking in your half naked body as her hands run over your warm skin. âUnravelled.â
Her hips start to pick up their movements beneath you again and you canât help but rock against her on your own this time. She smirks. Her hands return possessively to their place on your hips, guiding you. âHmm, thatâs it baby.â Natasha groans, her fingers digging into your skin as your arms wrap around her shoulders. âJust like that. Take what you need. Good girl.â
Your own moans and whimpers fill the air as you chase your release. You canât remember the last time youâve been this close to an orgasm, the realization makes you desperate, your movements picking up on the older woman's lap. Natasha gives one harsh thrust up and comes in her underwear, the sight of her coming undone beneath you triggering your owe release. You come, hard, on her lap, the outline of her cock pressing deliciously into your pussy as you grind down.
The sound of laboured breaths fill the room, your body slumped over Natashaâs as she tightens her arms around you, pulling you closer. She waits until she feels your breath even out before lifting you off of her, urgency clear in her strength as she maneuvers you onto the bed, your back pressed against the sheets and her muscular body between your legs.
Her mouth latches onto the delicate skin of your neck, a gasp leaving your lips as she bites down. âNo marks.â You whine, feeling her growl against your pulse. Her mouth moves down your body, taking each of your nipples in her mouth and delighting in the feeling of you squirming beneath her, the sounds you make music to her ears.
She slides your panties off gently, as if revealing a gormet meal. Her lips wrap around your clit, sucking gently. Your body reacts instinctively, without your permission. A pitiful whine passes your lips, your back arching off the bed, hips rising toward her mouth for more. Your thighs threaten to close around her head, but her strong arms pull them apart. âBe a good girl, y/n.â She says between licking and sucking your clit. âJust lie there and take it for me.â
Your orgasm sneaks up on you much faster than the first, your body still alight with fire from the first time you came in the night. Natasha purposefully neglects your entrance, only teasing the dripping hole a few times before refocusing her efforts on your bundle of nerves. âPlease.â You gasp as she teases you again, her tongue flattening over your entrance, tasting you from the source but refusing to dip inside. âOh, god. Please.â
Natasha chuckles, her mouth parting from you long enough to tease. The sight of her, between your legs, pupils blown wide and lower face glistening with your arousal is enough to have your breath catching in her lungs. But then she opens her mouth and you're not sure youâll ever breathe right again. âDaddy wants to see you cum just like this, baby. All desperate and aching to have your hole filled. You can do that for me right?â
âYes.â You pant, with little thought to the word or what it means. Natashaâs hand slides up your body, slow and deliberate, her eyes dilating further as she watches you arch into her feather light touch, only for you to whimper as she takes your nipple between her fingers and pinches roughly. âYes, who?â
You squirm beneath her touch, the pain moulding with pleasure in a way that has your brain short circuiting. âYes, daddy. Iâll be good for you.â
Natasha only hums her approval before dropping her mouth back to your clit, one arm holding you against the mattress while the other plays with your tits. You come with her mouth on you, moans of âdaddyâ crashing with curses and pleas.
Natasha doesnât allow you a moment of peace before you feel two of her fingers dive into you. Her body is hovering over you, eyes locked on the way your face screws up with overstimulated pleasure. You cry out, hands flying to her shoulders in an attempt to stay grounded. âJesus- fuck!â You scream, her maddening pace meaning your barley over one organism as another builds.
âI thought this is what you wanted, baby?â Natasha teases, voice filled with faux innocence. Her fingers curl inside you, finding that specific spot as her palm drags messily over your clit. âDonât you want to cum on daddy's fingers?â
Your thighs shake on either side of Natasha's body, your muscles tensing as you gasp for air. âI do!â You sob, pulling Natasha down to your lips, hers hovering just above you. Just enough to feel them graze over your own. âPlease daddy. I want to cum for you.â
Natasha smiles, a chuckle passing her lips as she drags them over your neck, barely touching the skin there. âI can feel you shaking.â She laughs. âIs it that good?â
âYes!â
Natashaâs teeth clamp down on your shoulder, the harshness of it sending a jolt straight to your core. âYes daddy! It feels so good. You feel so good!â
Natasha moans against your skin and you watch as she hastily fumbles with the belt on her pants pulling it and her trousers down skillfully with one hand and grinding her hard on against your ass. The sight of her, desperate and grinding just under where she needs to be while she has so much power over you pushes you over the edge, your vision blurring as you let out a guttural moan, nails digging into the womanâs back.
Natasha takes time to look over you, flat on your back for her, panting and spent. Your hair is a mess, your body covered in sweat, your pupils blown wide as you watch her rub herself against you. Itâs all of ten seconds later before sheâs lunging at you, covering your body completely with her own as she lines herself up with your pussy.
âFuck Iâm going to take you for myself. No one will have you once Iâm done with you. Youâll be mine. Only mine.â
Natasha pushes herself inside and you cry out, not used to such a delicious feeling. âWait-â
A firm hand is placed over your mouth, stopping you from speaking and all but cutting off your air supply as your eyes widen in shock and arousal.
âIf the next words to come out of your mouth arenât âDaddy pleaseâ Iâm going to spank you so hard you wonât be able to sit for a week.â She growls.
You moan against her hand and nod, tears filling your eyes as she removes the offending limb and places it on your hips using is as an anchor to push into you deeper.
âPlease, Daddy.â You beg, unsure of what you're asking for but you're so certain it feels good to beg for whatever it is regardless.
Natasha slides herself fully inside of you, letting out a sigh of relief and kissing your temple. The gentle act surprises you, considering how rough sheâd been only seconds ago. âYou feel like heaven baby. Are you okay?â She asks, her eyes meeting your own as she waits for an honest answer before doing anything else.
You nod, your own voice failing you. âNo, baby.â Natasha says, thumb tracing over your bottom lip. âDaddy wants to hear you say it.â
You whine, words seeming so far out of your grasp. âPlease.â You beg, lifting your hips to hers and fighting against yourself to do it again when Natasha buckles above you, a load moan falling past her lips and her head falling into the crook of your neck. âGood girl.â She grunts, moving her hips to slide out of you, leaving only the tip inside before sliding back in and bottoming out in one thrust.
âDaddy.â You whimper, nails digging into her shoulders. Natasha sighs, the warmth of you surrounding her pulling her into a state of bliss sheâs not used to. âMy good girl.â She growls, feeling something altogether feral take over her. âOnly mine.â Her pace picks up, her dick sliding into you in a way that draws out both her pleasure and her own, ensuring you feel every inch, every twitch, every possessive pump of her inside you.
âWhen Iâm done with you, youâll belong to me do you understand.â She growls, one hand sneaking between your bodies to rub circles around your clit. You cry out, back arching off the bed, every sensation becoming too much.
âNgh- daddy plea-â
âShhh. Baby just let daddy use you. Let me have it. All of you.â The noise that passes your lips is altogether foreign to you. You sound broken. Desperate for reprieve and so much more all at once. Itâs shattering. Itâs beautiful.
Natasha moans, her hand moving from your clit to your throat, holding you down. âJust take it sweet girl.â She grunts, feeling her climax closing in. âGod- Iâm gonna cum in you. No one will ever touch you again. Youâre mine.â
You nod along to yer words, mindlessly agreeing to anything she wants, everything, so long as she doesnât stop. âDaddy Iâm gonna come.â You whine out, feeling yourself clench around her.
âGo on baby.â She pants above you, her grip on your throat tightening, her eyes locked on the way your own roll to the back of your head. âCum around your daddyâs cock like a good little slut.â
You do, you cum with her cock buried inside of you, feeling her spill into you, her thrusts not slowing, drawing out the pleasure. Itâs not until you whimper and try to push her away that she stops.
Natasha pulls out of you slowly, mindful of your oversensative pussy. You whimper at the empty feeling it leaves you with and Natasha is on you in seconds. She rolls you to be lying down on top of her, your face pressed against the soft of her chest, her arms holding you close as she whispers to you.
âYou such a good girl, baby.â âYou did such a good job for me.â âShh Iâve got you, your okay.â
You lie in her arms for a while, feeling your body get heavier and your eyes begin to close as she runs her hands over your back soothingly. âSleep, sweet girl.â Natasha mumbles, placing a kiss to the top of your head.
A/n- This has been sitting in my drafts for far to long, perfect or not it is definitely time to get it out of the drafts. I am genuinely half asleep doing this last read through so please excuse any nonsense.
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But to my surprise after I went through Steph's instagram page I found out Calvin was indeed her dog. Which put my mind at ease after thinking she probably cheated on her boyfriend with me and that's why she ran away.
I wanted to give her space to think about everything and maybe come back but she never did so I took the matter into my own hands and next time I spotted Beth between the other girls I asked for Steph's address. I was pleasantly surprised that she and Steph actually lived together not only with them and Calvin but another dog named Mile.
So that is how I found myself on a cold Friday night standing on the steps in front of their apartment building, holding the raspberry croissants in one hand. It wasnât the same ones obviously but I knew the way of love was through the stomach for everyone if we like it or not. And I wanted to make it up to her anyway.
I took a deep breath in and rang the bell next to the door, making sure I looked composed and not too nervous. I was prepared for Beth or Steph to open the door but when the door opened I was met with another woman who I had never seen before. She was tall and looked just as confused as I was.
âHey, can I help you?â She had an accent so she totally wasnât from around here: âI..um, I am here to see Steph?â I asked hoping that Beth didnât give me some random address and now this woman is going to think I am weirdo.
âOh yeah sorry, I just never seen you before you are y/n right? Come on in.â She let me into kind of a big apartment, as I took my shoes off and followed the tall woman further into the living area I couldn't help but notice all the photos on the walls. They all looked like memories from all around the world.
âStephs room is right at the end of the hall.â She pointed towards the only door at the back.
I turned to her: âThank youâŠâ I looked at her hoping she would understand I was waiting for her to introduce herself.
âOh yeah I am Viv, Beth's girlfriend.â I smiled and nodded, Beth mentioned she had a girlfriend but not that she lived in this apartment as well.
âIt is nice to meet you, hopefully Iâll get to know you more.â I said, my feet already moving towards the bedroom.
âYeah, me too. Go easy on her.â She said, making me frown. Oh so she knows knows
âI will donât worry.â She smiled at me and suddenly I was in front of the door.
STEPH POV:
I was lying on my bed with Calvin, practically just staring at the ceiling. I missed y/n, but I didnât know what to say to her. I knew running away from the best kiss of my life was stupid and as soon as I stepped outside I wanted to go back and kiss her once more. But is it possible to like a person this much after two days of knowing them? I could not tell you. Beth assured me that it was okay to like someone right away. She called it destiny or something about y/n putting a love spell into the pastry she makes.
My stomach growled as I thought about her baking skills. Back in the kitchen as I was watching her work and explaining things to me I couldnât focus on anything other than her beautiful face, her perfectly toned arm muscles and her voice. God, her voice was like heaven to my ears. I never felt anything like this for a woman before, maybe it was because I was with my fiancee for too long to discover this part of myself.
A knock on the door broke me from my daydreaming and woke Calvin up too because he was immediately on his feet walking towards the door.
âCome in.â I thought it was either Beth or Viv asking if I wanted something to eat but I quickly sat up when I saw it was the baker who I had a hopeless crush on.
âHey, um. I am not good at this thing, but I wanted to say I am sorry about the other day. I should push you that far and umâŠI baked you these so you could taste them when the first time wasnât the best one.â I didnât know why or what she was apologizing for.
I smiled still nervous at her: âIâŠyou want to take me out on a date? I have never been with a woman before. You have to know that and I donât want to hurt you and just you know if it doesn't work out.â I stopped talking when she placed the paper bag she was holding on the bed, putting her hands carefully onto my hips: âSteph, I don't care if you've never been with a woman before, we can go as slow as you like. A date after a date. Kiss after a kiss. I wonât leave.â
I chuckled: âThat was so corny.â She laughed as well and shrugged her shoulders: âWhat can I say, pretty girls do that to me.â
âYou think I am pretty?â I whispered, pulling closer to her. She rested her forehead against mine. She looked me deep into eye: âI think you are beautiful." And she kissed me softly, slowly like we had all the time in the world.
A bark from Cavlin made us pull back from one and another, making us chuckle. Y/n crouched down in front of him as he licked her palm while she pet him: âWhat do you say Calvin can I take your mom on a date?â
Instead of answering he hopped onto the bed and put his face into the paper bag almost pulling out the pastry that was there.
âOh no, boy. Those ones are not for you, but I will come up with some pastry for dogs, okay?â Y/n said as she pushed the now half open paper bag into my arms: âI want you to taste one.â
I smiled and sat down next to her on my bed, our legs hanging from the end. I took the red croissant out and took a big bite.
âOh my god, they are amazing.â I nearly moaned as she laughed: âSo is it true what they say?â I looked at her weirdly about what she was talking about.
âThat love goes through the stomach.â She smirked but I shook my head: âNo,you just make the pastry of love.â
(Also sorry for the waiting I was finishing up my school so I didn't had much time to finish up.)
I quickly went to grab my charger and plug it in patiently waiting for my phone to wake up again. I was so eager to text Steph back even if it meant to admit that I did stalk her a little bit.
âBut you should have seen her face, she got so sad after I told her. She looked like she was really looking forward to it. You should text her.â I rolled my eyes at her: âAnd how am I supposed to text her I donât even know-â I was cut off by my phone lighting up with a notification from instagram. I usually turned it down but for some reason I opened this one. I was a new follower alert, nothing extraordinary but I stopped when my eyes landed on the name: âHoly shit!â I said as my phone nearly slipped from my hand.
Beth looked at me like I was crazy: âWhat is it?â I turned my phone screen her way and let her read the nickname: âWell, I guess she found you before you got the chance to complain one more time.â Beth laughed as she walked away with Mile following closely behind.
y/nTorres: Hey, sorry my phone died. I am not stalking justâŠ.admiring.
I read the message and I could feel myself blush. I never got this feeling with a girl before, yet alone flirting with one. I took a deep breath in and decided to answer.
stephcatley: well, I am glad. I was just thinking about you. Sorry that I had to cancel our plans but Calvin needed me.
Y/N POV:
There it was. Calvin again. I didnât know if it was her boyfriend, kid or some sort of animal. I was intrigued to find out but I stopped myself, what would she think of me if I just thought that she was single and her partner was an animal.
y/nTorres: I hope he is okay. We can always reschedule our plans
stephcatley: Yeah he is fine, we just went for a quick check up. And as for the plans I would like to try again.
Okay so check up, great that did not help me at all. I ran a hand through my hair and
sighed.
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The next day when I woke up I had my phone still in my hand. I must have fallen asleep while talking to Steph. She was very funny and we talked for hours about my pastry and about her football career. From her messages I could feel her love for the sport and her club. I always liked people who had a specific passion for the job they do.
I did not tell her about me having tickets to her dame today and maybe I should not even go, it could seem that I am too eager to see her, which of course was true. I talked to Vanesa over the phone on my way to the stadium telling her all about Stephs and Is conversation.
âI am telling you Calvin is either her child or her dog.â Vanesa tried to ease my nerves about Steph having a boyfriend.
I sighed: âI will talk to her about it, maybe if I get a chance to see her, where are the seats you said again?â
âRight next to the entrance onto the pitch, people call it a tunnel I think. Anyways I have to go have a nice game experience.â She replied and hung up on me. God this girl had even less idea about football then I did.
I put my phone into my pocket and started walking towards the stadium, it was bigger than what I expected and also more crowded then I imagined. I took a deep breath in, scanned my ticket and went to find my seat.
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The team Arsenal played against was quick but I could see the arsenal girls being quicker, sharper and overall more prepared than the other team. I couldnât believe how much fun I was having, between cheering and clapping when Beth scored to just being mesmerized by Steph herself. She looked anything but nervous, she was focused on the game, on the players in front of her. She looked great. Her sharp features were clearly visible as the sun shines onto her.
âFirst time here?â A woman next to me asked. I looked at her and frowned about how she found out: âYou have the glow about you. You know the one where you see the game live for the first time.â she chuckled as I did the same.
âYeah, first time at any football game actually.â I confessed.
âYeah, now it makes even more sense, you are not even wearing any merch. Are you here just for fun or to see someone specific?â
âOh, umâŠâ I didnât know what to say. Truthfully I was there to see Steph but we donât know each other well enough for me to say that: âI am just here toâŠadmire the view. I am new to London, so I am here to experience it all.â The woman didnât look convinced enough but let it go as the final whistle was blown. All the fans started to hurry towards the barriers so they could probably get to meet their favorite players or maybe just to get a photo.
As I looked at the crowd I decided not to wait for Steph to walk towards the stands and maybe got the opportunity to talk to her due to the mass of kids in front of me. I quickly snapped a few photos and one of Steph sent it to her with praise of a great play.
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Steph Pov:
We were celebrating in the locker room when I finally sat down after our game against Aston Villa. I had a few messages from y/n that I decided to look at. To my surprise it was a photo of me from this match which was weird. We talked almost the whole night last night and she never mentioned going to our match.
stephcatley: You definitely are a stalker now. Why didnât you tell me you are coming? I would've found you in the stands.
y/nTorres: It was a surprise for me too, like I said, I never saw a football match. And to your other questionâŠthere were so many younger fans who wanted to meet you, I got scared I would get lost.
I chuckled at her response, she was probably around 175 cm tall she definitely wouldn't get lost. We exchanged a few more texts before I got pulled towards the middle of the locker room for the after match analysis, but not before agreeing to our baking session later tonight.
I took a deep breath in and knocked on the door. Beth helped me pick up my outfit which was just classic blue washed jeans with a white short tee. I stood there for a few seconds before she opened the door greeting me with her warm smile.
âI love the lights.â I said pointing towards them, she looked at me and nodded: âYeah, it was my best friend's idea to put them like this. The shop shines even at night, she said itâs like my soulâŠstill shining. I donât know about that but, it was cute of her to say that.â
I smiled at the comment, her best friend was definitely a great person: âWell from what I've seen so far, she is right. So what are we baking?â
âFollow me, I will show you.â She took my hand and like last time she led me towards the back of her kitchen.
After she closed the door I was immediately met with a bunch of ingredients. Such as fresh raspberries, big blocks of butter and one big bowl of dough.
âHope you donât mind, I already made the standard dough but we are going to make one more for this donât worry.â
I smiled putting my hair up into a messy bun: âAll good, I canât say I know much about baking so it is probably better than you did it before.â
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Y/N POV:
Her saying that she was not a great baker made me frown: âWell, you are here to learn so come on.â
I walked towards the stove where I placed a big pot: âFirst we are going to make as I call it hot raspberries.â
She looked unsure about what I was talking about so I walked towards her taking her hand: âHere take this apron, we donât want that white shirt to get red. That is the first step.â She nodded and quickly put it over her head and made a nice bow at the back.
I took her hand again and led her towards the pot: âIt is simple, we just pour the raspberries into the pot and let them cook.â
âThat simple?â
I chuckled: âWell we have to stir it so it does not burn.â She laughed and carefully started putting the raspberries into the pot. It was so cute to watch her being so careful about not hurting the berries even though it wouldn't do anything if she just threw them in.
âNow we just stir?â She asked, pulling me away from my thoughts. I nodded, handing her the ladle.
I was standing close to her now as we both watched the raspberries turn into thick liquid. We were occasionally talking but for the most part she was focused on her job.
âNow that it's done we turn off the stove and let it cool down for a bit.â She looked at me: âAnd until then we are going to do what?â
I sighed: âWe are going to collect the flour from the back.â
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We successfully made the raspberry dough without making much of a mess, and now she was just watching me roll it out.
âNow itâs your turn with your red one to come here.â I motioned for her to get in front of me.
âHow do I do that?â She turned her head my way as I took her hands into mine slowly placing them onto the roller. My hands were covering hers as was also my body.
I gripped her hands and slowly started to move them, rolling out the dough: âYou have to do it carefully but also you canât be too gentle.â I tried to explain to her but I could feel her focus more on my face than the activity in front of us.
âWhat?â I asked, looking into her eyes as her head was turned my way. Our faces were a few centimeters away.
âI really want to kiss you right now.â She breathed out. It took me by surprise but I didnât pull away from her. Instead I closed the small gap between us slowly kissing her lips.
They were soft and she tasted the leftover raspberries she ate while we were baking.
The dough was quickly abandoned as she turned in my arms placing them around my neck pulling me close to her as mine slipped around her waist.
I turned us around and pulled her up onto the other side of the kitchen placing her against the cupboard earning a small moan from her.
She deepened the kiss, slipping her tongue into my mouth as we fought for dominance which I quickly won. The only sound in the room was our heavy breathing, I didnât know what had gotten into her but I knew I had to stop it before it turned into something more.
When I pulled away we were both trying to catch our breath, I looked at her softly but I could see some conflict in her eyes. As I didnât want to make her uncomfortable I slowly put her down onto her feet.
âIâŠum. I am so sorry. I donât know what got into me.â Steph started apologizing and putting the apron I gave her down. I frowned: âHey, itâs okay I didnât stop you either.â
She shook her head: âNo, I canât do this,you know IâŠ.I have to go.â
Someone might hate me for what I say, but France was the better team tonight and the offside wouldn't change a thing. Yeah it would probably be 2:2 both teams would secure one point. But let's be realistic for a second, regardless the bad var call, England didn't play like the defending champions. And I say this as a England fan.
pairings: alexia putellas x sister!reader, alba putellas x sister!reader, juju watkins x reader
summary: if there was one thing you could bet on, it was your sister disappointing you
warnings: angst and technically no resolve
notes: literally have nothing to say for once
Heartbreak is different for everyone.
Some people remember it as the moment their first love let them go. Others trace it back to a friendship turned sour, a betrayal they never saw coming. But you⊠yours came earlier, quieter, and crueler in a way only family could manage.
Your first heartbreak came the day you realized your sisterâyour hero, your first best friendâwas slipping out of your life.
Alexia Putellas, your older sister, your protector, the person you used to believe had hands strong enough to hold the sky up for youâstopped looking at you the same way.
You had always adored her. Idolized her. From the day the adoption papers were finalized and you walked into that house clutching Jaumeâs hand and wearing shoes two sizes too big, Alexia had taken one look at youâquiet, wide-eyed, scaredâand declared you hers. Her sister. Her shadow. Her reason.
She used to take you everywhere. Practices, matches, gala dinners, even press conferences. Sheâd beam every time someone asked who you were. âMy little sister. My little bear,â sheâd say, with a proud hand on your shoulder like you were some priceless gem. You clung to her like a lifeline. Back then, you didnât speak much, barely at all, but Alexia always understood. She didnât need your words to know how you felt. She could tell from your breathing, your posture, the way your hand would grip hers just a little tighter when the world got too loud.
You were always in her camera rolls. On her mind. In her heart. She would tell you stories about your fatherâhow he loved you, protected you, how he would be proud of all three of you. Every night, she made sure you fell asleep to that certainty. You believed her. You trusted her. You believed she would always be in your corner.
But something changed.
It wasnât sudden, but it was steady. And unlike most tragedies, this one had a timestamp. You could track the moment everything cracked and never quite healed.
You were ten when you told her. âI think I like snowboarding more than football.â
It had taken everything in you to say it. You knew what football meant to her. You knew what it symbolized in your house. Football was not just a gameâit was legacy, pride, identity.
Her silence afterward was deafening. She didnât say she was disappointed. She didnât have to. The look in her eyes said it all: something had died in her.
From there, the decline was slow but sharp. She stopped waiting for you after school. Stopped inviting you to her games. Stopped asking if you wanted to train together, or offering to watch your videos, or posting about you on her story.
When you quit football altogether at eleven, it was like youâd ripped out her heart and stomped on it.
And she made you pay for it.
Not in overt cruelty, Alexia was too proud for that, but in distance. Cold, cutting distance.
The house changed. Dinners were quieter. She spoke to you like you were a stranger. And when she did talk to you, it was usually to correct you, dismiss you, argue.
But nothing compared to that night at the dinner table. You were twelve and freshly selected for the Youth Olympic Games. The youngest athlete in your division. You shouldâve been celebrated. You shouldâve been hugged, held, supported. Instead, you were scolded.
âWhat do you mean? Mami, sheâs 11 years old.â Alexiaâs tone was full of disbelief. Not the good kind. Not the âIâm so proud I could burstâ kind. Noâhers was sharp, judgmental, disapproving.
You tightened your grip on your fork. âIâm 12,â you muttered. The words dropped like lead. The fact that she didnât even remember your age? That stung worse than anything.
She waved it off. â11, 12âno difference. Mami, sheâs a child. Why is she going to Switzerland alone?â
You could feel Eliâs worry rising. You didnât need to look at her to know her eyes were scanning your body for signs of collapse. Your leg was already trembling under the table. Rage was a fire youâd learned to contain like second nature.
âAlexia, amor, calm down. Itâs for snowboarding andââ
âPlease.â Alexia scoffed. Dismissed you like a tantrum.
That was it. That was your final straw. You stood so suddenly the chair legs scraped violently against the tile.
You met her eyes. The eyes that once used to protect you. Now they just pierced through you like daggers. âI am going to compete in the Youth Olympics, Alexia,â you said, voice calm and final. âThis is a huge opportunity for me and I will not allow you to take it away from me.â
Alexia stood too, her body stiff with disbelief and something crueler. âIâm looking out for you, Bear,â she snapped. âThereâs no substance in snowboarding like there is in football. This is a waste of time and moneyââ
âOkay, La Reina,â you spat. The title hit the air like poison. You didnât cry. Not then. You saved your tears for the quiet of your room, where you curled up in a ball with your boarding gloves pressed to your chest like armor. You didnât cry because she broke your dreams. You cried because she made you feel replaceable.
Seven years later and it still haunts you. You barely talk now. When you do, itâs formal. Stilted. She still sends birthday texts. Still posts the occasional âFeliç aniversari a la meva germanaâ on her story. But you know itâs for show. You know she misses the idea of you, not the you that exists now.
Sheâs never watched one of your competitions. Never reposted a podium photo. She didnât even come to your Olympics qualifier, even when you sent her a VIP pass.
And you⊠you pretend it doesnât bother you. You tell the press youâre close. You wear a smile so well they call you grĂ cia viva, living grace. But your mom sees the truth. Eli always sees the truth. Poor Alba, caught in the middle.
You donât hate your sister. Thatâs the part that hurts most. You love her. You still love her. But maybe heartbreak isnât always a person walking away. Sometimes itâs them standing right in front of youâcold, distant, unreachableâwhile youâre screaming on the inside, âWhy wasnât I enough?â
The 2022 Winter Olympics were supposed to be the moment everything made sense.
You were seventeen. Young, yes, but a veteran in your own way. You had grown up on freezing slopes, in and out of physio, bruised ribs and broken collarbones, frostbitten fingers wrapped in tape. Youâd missed birthdays, school dances, holidays. You gave up comfort, gave up home.
But you got here. To Beijing. And not just as a participant, no, you came as one of Spainâs youngest medal hopefuls. The snowboarding world knew your name. âThe kid with the velvet landing.â âThe girl who dances in the air.â âPutellasâ younger sister.â
You had always hated that one. Still, for once, you let yourself hold onto the hope that maybe she would be proud of you.
You hadnât asked Alexia for anything in years. Not really. After everythingâafter the Switzerland fight, after she stopped replying to your training updates, after she missed your junior world debut, you had learned to stop expecting.
But this was different. It was the Olympics. Your Olympics. You asked her a month before, when she had dropped by for dinner. She was already halfway out the door when you said her name, your voice barely above a whisper. âWill you come?â
She blinked, brows lifting. âTo what, Bear?â
âMy⊠final. In Beijing. They qualified me.â You swallowed, looked at your hands. âI mean. You donât have to. But. Iâd like it.â
She hesitated. Her phone buzzed in her hand. You could tell she was weighing the question like a burden. You almost told her never mind. Almost spared yourself the ache.
âOf course,â she said with a small smile. âI wouldnât miss it.â
You nodded fast, pretending you werenât holding your breath. Pretending you didnât care as much as you did. You waited until she left before curling up on the couch and sobbing silently into a pillow.
For the first time in years, she was going to see you. Not as her sister. Not as a mistake. As an athlete. As someone who made it.
You bought her a pass. You reserved the second-row seatâdead center, right behind the glass barrier where she could see the entire pipe.
You even got her a lanyard with her name on itâAlexia Putellas, gold letters on red, with a little heart drawn in black marker. You didnât tell anyone about the heart.
You told your coach she was coming. Your teammates. You were practically glowing all week. You woke up early for training. Landed every trick like your bones were made of fire and ice and every breath felt like flight. You were ready.
The day of the final arrived, and Beijing was frigid and unforgivingâbut you didnât feel the cold. Not with your nerves humming like static beneath your skin.
You checked your phone again. Nothing.
She must be flying in today, you told yourself. Or sleeping. Or offline.
Alba wrapped you in a hug before you took off for the start platform. Eli whispered, âWhatever happens, weâre proud of you.â
But you only looked at the seat. The second-row, dead center. Still empty.
You forced a smile. They called your name. The announcers said it slowlyâdrawn out, reverent âRepresenting Spain⊠the youngest finalist in the competition!â
The crowd roared. You dropped in and everything disappeared. You soared, spun, flipped through the air with a grace that made people gasp. Back-to-back 1080s.
You stuck the landing so hard it felt like the ice cracked beneath your board.
The stadium erupted. The commentators lost their minds. One of them shouted, âWe are witnessing history!â
You looked up. At the second-row seat. Still. Empty.
You didnât cry right away. You waved, you smiled, you stood on the podium as Spainâs anthem played and the gold medal was placed around your neck. The announcer called the trick âThe Putellas 1080ââyour name immortalized in sport.
And still⊠her seat was empty. You got off the podium and disappeared into the locker room. Alone. You collapsed on a bench and stared at the lanyard still clutched in your pocket like a fool. Thatâs when you cried.
Not because of the win. Not because of exhaustion. Because you felt like a little kid again, hoping for someone who never shows.
You opened your phone. No texts. No calls. Nothing. You opened Instagram. Her story was at the top. A boomerang. Brunch. Mimosas. Her teammates. Laughter. Sunglasses. Barcelona.
Not even a caption. Not even a âGood luck.â Not even your name.
Alba tried to call her, three times. Eli texted: âShe just won gold. Where are you?â
You didnât text her. You just stared at your blinking cursor, then locked your phone and put it face down.
She didnât forget. She just didnât care.
So you stood there, with a gold medal around your neck and tears in your eyes, wondering how a person could fly so high and still feel like theyâd fallen all the way down.
Because your sisterâthe one who once tucked you in, who once promised you the worldâdidnât show up for the moment that was supposed to prove you were worth something too.
And that seat stayed empty.
Just like her promises.
You chose USC for a lot of reasons. The scholarship was goodâfull ride, top-tier training facilities, a snowboarding coach whoâd been following your career since you were fifteen. But it wasnât just about athletics. It was about starting over. A new coast. A new country. A new version of yourself.
Spain had started to feel like a closed room. Every street corner felt like a memory, every look a reminder of who you were supposed to be. Here in LA, you could finally breathe. You could walk onto campus and just be you. Not Putellasâ sister. Not the girl who quit football. Not the disappointment.
Just⊠a kid with a dream and a couple of gold medals in a box under their bed.
You moved in late August, when the sun was brutal and the air felt like it was trying to melt the sidewalks. You were sweating before you even stepped out of the cab. Alba came with you, of courseâEli too. Eli cried three times before you even got your keys. Alexia? Nowhere. She said sheâd come.
She said it weeks ago, back when you finally built up the courage to tell her over video call. You had been bracing yourself for the sigh, the eye roll, the dismissive âWhy not stay closer to home?â But instead, she smiled. A real one, you thought. âUSC,â sheâd said. âThatâs amazing. Iâm proud of you.â
You almost believed it. She promised sheâd fly in for the move. She even asked what kind of bedsheets you liked. You didnât think sheâd show up with a care package and balloons or anything, but⊠you thought sheâd be there.
At least long enough to help you carry your snowboard bag. At least long enough to say goodbye. You waited. All morning.
You held off unpacking your posters, your photo frames, your books. You checked your phone. You kept it on loud even though it buzzed with welcome emails and suitemates messages and boring orientation reminders.
You texted her. âWhere are you?â No reply.
Alba watched you spiral quietly. She didnât say anything until after lunch. Thatâs when she touched your shoulder, voice careful. âCariño⊠I think sheâs not coming.â
You didnât answer. You opened Instagram again. There it was. Her story. A new post. A brand launch. She was in Madridâposing in a silk suit, glass of wine in hand, tagged in a hotel you couldnât pronounce.
The caption read: âSurround yourself with people who show up.â
You stared at it until your eyes blurred. Until the words started to feel like a personal attack.
âSurround yourself with people who show up.â You couldnât make that up if you tried.
Alba nearly dropped her phone when she saw it. Eli muttered something in Catalan under her breath and left the room, too furious to stay.
You didnât cry. Not right away. Not when your suite mate introduced herself. Not when you put your shirts in the tiny wooden drawers. Not even when Alba hugged you goodbye and whispered, âIâm so proud of you. Be great.â
No, you waited. You waited until the door shut and your new roommate left for dinner, and the quiet of your new life settled over you like a weight.
You sat on your bed, knees pulled to your chest, and finallyâfinallyâlet yourself cry.
You werenât asking for much. You werenât asking her to be your coach. You werenât asking her to make you a jersey or fly your flag. You just wanted her to be there. Just once. For you.
But againâagainâAlexia Putellas found something more important. Again, she chose to miss it. Again, she disappointed you.
And this time, you had no choice but to unpack without her. You hung the photo of you on the podium by your desk. Right next to your calendar. Right above the lanyard from Beijing you still kept in your backpack.
And in your head, you rewrote her caption,
âSurround yourself with people who donât lie when they say theyâll show up.â
Because you were done holding your breath for someone who never came.
Youâre nineteen now.
Youâve learned how to wear medals like armor and let applause drown out the ache. Youâve learned to accept silence from the one person who used to promise the world. And youâve learned how to be alone, even when surrounded by cameras and podiums and screaming fans.
Youâve never lost before. Not like this.
The crash happens during a training run for the World Championships. Youâre in the best shape of your life. Youâve won gold at every X Games since 17. People are calling you unstoppable. A phenomenon. A machine.
You go up for a switch backside 900. A trick youâve done a thousand times. A trick you could land in your sleep. But snowboarding doesnât care about confidence. Gravity doesnât care about your reputation.
You rotate a little too far. Land a little too flat. Your board catches on the lip, your body folds in half, and something snapsâloud and unforgiving. Then everything goes black.
You wake up in the hospital. Lights too bright. Pain everywhere. Your knee is bandaged to hell. Tubes and IVs. Ice packs. Morphine drip. The doctor says the words like theyâre reading the news. Torn ACL. Partial meniscus tear. Ligament damage. Out for the season. Multiple surgeries. Long recovery.
You nod. You say thank you. You feel nothing, just numb. Until Eli bursts into the room and grabs your hand like sheâs anchoring herself. Until Alba shows up hours later, eyes swollen from crying, holding your favorite hoodie and a bag of cut fruit like itâs going to fix your bones.
You let yourself cry then. Not because youâre scared. Not even because it hurts. But because you were asking for her. You didnât ask for much. Not a parade. Not a plane full of roses. Just a visit. A text. A FaceTime call. A sign.
You knew Alba would come. She always does. She took off work without hesitation. Was at the airport before your coach finished calling her. Eli packed everything she could think ofâchargers, your favorite chocolate, that stupid necklace you always wear when youâre nervous.
But Alexia? Nothing.
Eli texted her. Multiple times. Alba sent the X-ray. The hospital name. The room number. Even added, âSheâs asking for you.â
And stillâno call. No reply. No anything. Later that night, drugged up and sore and barely holding yourself together, you open Instagram.
Her storyâs at the top. Sheâs at the Barcelona v Real Madrid Champions League match. VIP box. Grinning. Waving to the camera. Arm around a player you donât recognize.
Not even a âGet well soon.â Not even a mention.
You stare at the screen until your eyes blur. You delete her contact. You donât hesitate this time.
The press gets wind of your injury quickly. The next day, theyâre asking about rehab plans, timelines, and of courseâthe question you knew was coming.
âHas your sister reached out?â
You smile. Clean, robotic, and controlled.
âSheâs busy,â you say. âI donât need her.â
They print that quote in bold. Everyone thinks itâs about strength. They donât realize itâs about grief.
But that night, while the meds fog your brain and your leg throbs with every heartbeat, you whisper into the dark, voice cracking like glass, âWhy am I never enough for her?â
Thereâs no answer. But then you turn to the side, and Albaâs still sitting in the corner chair, curled up with a book, glasses perched low on her nose.
You reach for her hand. âThank you for coming. For always coming.â
She puts the book down and takes your hand without hesitation. Her lip trembles.
âCariño,â she whispers, leaning in. âI will always be there for you. No matter what. I donât care if youâre snowboarding or dancing or doing nothing at all. I love you because youâre you.â
She kisses your forehead like youâre five again. Like you havenât spent the last decade learning how to pretend you donât need that. You cry quietly. And she stays right there.
Rehab is brutal. Your leg hates you. Your body feels foreign. There are days you canât even sit up without feeling like somethingâs tearing inside you. You stop checking your phone. Stop responding to people. You live in sweatshirts and oversized joggers.
But then, thereâs her.
You meet her in physical therapy. JuJu Watkins. Womenâs basketball. Same school. Same injury.
Youâre both limping around on crutches when you first cross pathsâboth pissed off, both exhausted, both trying not to show how much it hurts.
You donât talk much at first. You nod at each other across the room. Commiserate in silence. Trade glances during the ice bath when neither of you are brave enough to scream.
Then one day she tosses a stress ball at your head. âYou look like youâre one bad playlist away from throwing your crutches at someone.â
You laugh. For real. After that, things shift.
She starts waiting for you after sessions. You eat protein bars together on the curb. She makes you playlists. You make her snowboarding memes. You watch old competition tapes together and she actually asks questions. Not about Alexia. Not about your gold medals. Just you.
Thereâs something unspoken between you. You donât kiss. You donât hold hands. But sometimes she rests her hand over yours when your knee is shaking too hard. And sometimes she lets you lean into her when youâre too tired to stand.
And in the quiet, you realizeâthis is the first time in a long time someoneâs shown up without being asked.
Someone who doesnât owe you anything. Someone who sees you. All of you. Broken and bitter and trying anyway.
You donât say it. She doesnât either. But some nights, when the pain wonât let you sleep and the silence starts clawing at your chest, you text her.
And she always replies. Always.
Alba calls you three times before you pick up. The first time, you let it ring. The second, you stare at the screen, thumb hovering over âDecline.â By the third, youâre sitting on the edge of your bed, phone pressed to your ear, your voice flat when you say, âHola.â
Thereâs silence on the other end for a second. Then the sound of Albaâs breathâshaky, like she ran to find a private place to call. Like sheâs been crying.
âMi amor,â she says softly, like her heart is breaking. âDid you see it?â
Alexia had done an interview with a local magazine, basically telling the whole world you donât talk much and have gone your separate ways.
You donât answer. âIâm so sorry,â she whispers. âI donât know whatâs wrong with her. I donât understand why she keeps doing this. Why sheâwhy she said it like that.â
You clench your jaw. You can feel JuJu moving around the kitchen in your dorm apartment, pretending sheâs not listening but staying close. Just in case.
You press your palm to your forehead, digging your fingers into your temple, like maybe you can press the ache away. âItâs fine.â
âNo, itâs not,â Alba says. Her voice cracks. âItâs not fine. You donât deserve that. You donât deserve her saying that about you, not after everything youâve done, not after everything sheâs missed.â
You swallow the lump in your throat, the one thatâs been building since you read the quote the fourth, fifth, sixth time, just to make sure you werenât imagining it. "She's doing her own thing. We're in very different worlds. I don't really follow snowboarding."
âShe didnât even try,â you murmur.
âWhat?â Alba asks, but youâre not even talking to her anymore. Youâre staring at your reflection in the dark laptop screen, hollow-eyed and motionless.
âShe couldâve said something. Anything. She couldâve lied,â you say. Your voice is quiet, but itâs full of something hot and bitter and rotting. âShe couldâve said she was proud. That weâre close. That she believes in me. But she didnât even pretend.â
Alba doesnât interrupt. You hear the sound of her sniffling quietly, trying to keep it together.
âI always told myself she was just⊠bad at showing it,â you go on. âThat maybe she was proud and just didnât know how to say it. That she still loved me even if she didnât show up. I believed that. For years.â
A pause. And then, with a voice so small it doesnât feel like yours, âI donât think sheâs my sister anymore.â
Itâs the truth. The ugliest, rawest truth youâve ever said out loud. The moment you say it, it shatters something in you.
You hear Alba gasp softlyâlike the words physically hit her.
âI thinkââ you stop. Take a breath. Try again. âI think she decided a long time ago that I wasnât worth it. That I ruined her dream of having a little sister in football. And sheâs been punishing me ever since.â
Alba doesnât speak for a long time. You think maybe sheâs crying again, and it makes you feel sick. You didnât want to hurt her. Sheâs the only one whoâs always been there. She didnât deserve the fallout of Alexiaâs silence.
âI donât know what to say,â Alba whispers eventually. âBut sheâs wrong. She is so wrong. You are the bravest, strongest, most brilliant girl I know, and if she canât see that, then sheâs not just a bad sisterâsheâs a fool.â
You nod slowly, tears finally prickling at your lashes. Not from grief this time, but from exhaustion. From being so tired of trying.
âYou donât have to prove anything to her anymore, cariño,â Alba says. âYou never did.â
You donât answer.
Instead, you say, âI should go. My kneeâs starting to throb.â
âOkay,â Alba says, soft and warm. âBut promise me youâll eat something.â
âI will,â you lie.
âPromise me youâll let JuJu take care of you a little.â
âIâll try.â
Alba laughs a little, watery and heartbroken. âI love you. No matter what you choose do, okay.â
âI love you too.â You hang up.
You donât move for a while after the call. You just sit there, breathing through the tightness in your chest. The space around you feels sharp. Like every corner is pressing in.
JuJu comes into the room without asking. She hands you a hot water bottle and a protein bar and sits down next to you, close but not crowding.
âSheâs never going to be who you need her to be,â JuJu says after a while, voice low. âYou know that, right?â
You stare at the wall. âI know.â
âAnd it sucks.â
You nod.
Then she says the first words that feel like a wound getting dressed, âBut itâs not your fault.â
You break then. Not loud. Not dramatic. But your shoulders tremble and your fingers curl tight around the blanket and the first tears fall without warning.
JuJu doesnât say anything. Just wraps an arm around you and holds you like she knows exactly what it feels like to grieve someone whoâs still alive. Because thatâs what this is. Itâs not a sister anymore. Itâs just a memory of one.
Itâs been one of those days. Youâve just finished your second rehab session of the day, your leg screaming after two straight hours of pool resistance work, hamstring bridges, and endless banded squats. Your quad is on fire. Your hip clicks when you walk. Your knee is stiff, swollen, irritatedâjust like your mood.
You didnât sleep last night. Youâd had another nightmare: the one where youâre mid-air, about to land the trick, but your knee gives out before you touch ground. You wake up just as your body slams into ice.
Your usual ride flaked, your Lyft app refused to work, and JuJu had a Nike shoot, so you dragged yourself to rehab on a campus bus, limping through the rain. Your hoodie is soaked. Your brace itches under your joggers. You didnât eat breakfast because you were too nauseous from the pain meds and the lingering ghost of the dream.
Now you sit in the USC sports medicine lounge, earbuds in, your phone dead, your soul heavier than your gear bag. Youâre trying to summon the will to get up and walk the fifteen minutes back to your place.
You close your eyes. You count to ten. You fail to move. And then, your Apple Watch buzzes.
Olga RĂos:
âIâm outside. Come down.â
You blink, frown, then stare. You havenât seen Olga in over a year. Not since Christmas in Mollet. Not since that long, painful dinner where Alexia barely looked at you, and Olga was the only one who asked about your season. âTell me about Aspen,â sheâd said, smiling, genuinely curious. âI saw your run. That second 900? Insane.â
You shuffle to your feet. You grab your backpack and limp toward the entrance of the building, wondering if this is a prank. Some twisted hallucination conjured up by pain and regret and too many electrolyte tablets.
But no. There she is.
Standing in the rain, hood up, drenched in a designer coat and sneakers that donât deserve puddles, holding two steaming coffee cups like itâs nothing. Like flying thirteen hours across the world just to check on you is a regular thing.
You stare at her. She smiles. âYou gonna open the door, or should I stand here and slowly drown?â
You push the door open, dazed. âWhat⊠what are you doing here?â
She shrugs, stepping forward to wrap you in a hug so gentle it nearly breaks you. One arm low, careful not to touch your brace. The kind of hug that says, I see you. I know you hurt. I came anyway.
âI had a break in work,â she says. âAnd I missed you.â
She pulls back and hands you a cup. âItâs your favorite. Oat milk, extra shot, sugar on the bottom.â
You stare at the cup like it might dissolve in your hands.
âIâve been following your recovery,â Olga adds quietly. âAlba told me everything. The surgery. The pain. The nightmares.â
Your throat tightens. Your eyes sting. You havenât said those words aloud to anyoneânot even JuJu. You just nod.
âI wanted to come sooner,â she says. âBut I didnât want to push you.â
âYouâre not pushing,â you whisper.
She smiles, brushing your damp hair behind your ear. âGood. Now letâs go get lunch. You look like you havenât eaten anything that wasnât blended into a smoothie in weeks.â
That actually makes you laugh. The first real laugh in days.
You find a small cafe near campus, half-empty and playing old Spanish ballads over the speakers. You sit across from Olga in a booth by the window, your knee up on a chair, brace still wrapped tight, and for the first time in weeks, you donât feel like a burden.
She asks about your rehab, your strength progressions, your PT goals. Not just, âHowâs it going?â but real questions. She doesnât flinch when you talk about the pain. She listens. She holds space. Sheâs not there to be impressed, sheâs there because she cares.
Halfway through your salad, you set your fork down. And then, very quietly, you ask, âDoes she ever talk about me?â
Olgaâs smile falters.
âSometimes,â she says carefully. âBut never the way you deserve.â
You stare down at the wilted arugula on your plate.
âShe says sheâs proud,â Olga continues, âbut she never tells you. She says youâre dramatic. But I think she just⊠doesnât know how to love someone who didnât follow her path.â
You nod, slow and tired. You donât have the energy to pretend it doesnât matter.
âSheâs not a bad person,â Olga says gently. âBut sheâs a bad sister right now. And you deserve better than silence.â
You whisper, âI just wanted her to come to the award ceremony. Or say something. Anything.â
âI know.â
âShe didnât even text me on my birthday.â
âI know.â
You pause.
âI didnât even want a present,â you whisper. âI just wanted her to remember.â
Olga reaches across the table and takes your hand. Her grip is soft, but steady. Unshakable.
âWell, I remembered,â she says. âAnd next year? Iâm making you a cake. A huge one. With gold icing and little fondant snowboards and one of those stupid edible trophies. Deal?â
You sniff. A tear escapes. You laugh. âDeal.â
Then, Olga leans back, eyes sharp now, teasing. âNow tell me about this mystery girlfriend youâve been pretending isnât your girlfriend.â
You nearly choke on your drink.
âIâsheâs notâwhat?â
âJuJu,â Olga says, smirking. âCome on. Youâve posted her like five times and you never post anyone. You blush every time she texts. Iâm not blind.â
You bury your face in your hands. âOh my god.â
âSheâs cute,â Olga says. âI approve.â
You groan. âFine. Weâre⊠weâre dating. Kinda. I think.â
Olga grins like a cat. âWell, I want to meet her.â
You blink. âNow?â
âSheâs done with the shoot, right?â
You stare at her. âYou planned this.â
She winks. âA little.â
Fifteen minutes later, JuJu walks into the cafe, wearing grey USC sweats, curls pulled back, sneakers soaked from the rain. Her eyes go wide when she sees you and Olga sitting together.
âOh, damn,â she says. âYou werenât kidding.â
You stand and hug her, your brace squeaking against the seat. âThis is Olga. Alexiaâs girlfriend.â
JuJu offers her hand. âNice to meet you. Iâve heard⊠not a lot, actually.â
Olga laughs. âThatâs probably wise.â
They talk. Easily. Effortlessly. JuJu is respectful and calm. She doesnât try to impress. She just is. And somehow, thatâs enough. Olga likes her. You can tell.
And as you sit there, watching the two of them talk over shared churros and coffee, your chest feels lighter.
Because someone showed up for you. Because people love you in real time. Because youâre not alone.
And maybe your sister never asks how you are. But her girlfriend does. And for the first time in a long time, that feels like enough.
The barbecue is held at your grandmotherâs house in Mollet. Long tables covered in bright cloth, kids running around with juice boxes, cousins you havenât seen in years hugging you and saying things like, âLook at you! Olympian!â or âI saw you in El PaĂs, you were amazing.â
You smile. Youâre polite. You take pictures. You let your aunts kiss both cheeks. You help Eli carry trays from the kitchen even though your knee still stiffens after sitting too long. But youâre walking now, no crutches. Just the brace. And thatâs enough to make you feel like maybe, finally, youâre okay.
Youâre okay because youâre back. Youâre in talks with Nike for your own snow gear line. You just finalized a Gatorade dealâyour own custom flavor on shelves by in a month, Persimmon Rush. You and JuJu are something soft and steady and unspoken. Youâre healing.
For a moment, you even forget to worry about her. Until you hear her voice. Alexia.
She shows up late. Walks in with sunglasses on, one arm slung around Olga. She greets everyone like a queen, smiling, laughing, tossing her hair back like itâs nothing.
You try to keep your distance. Youâve had enough battles.
But of course, the moment you start talking with your uncle about the Nike line, you feel her standing behind you.
âSo,â she says, cutting into the conversation with a smirk. âNike, huh? Theyâre making snow goggles now?â
You blink. Slowly turn. âTheyâre launching a womenâs snow line. Iâm consulting on the design.â
She shrugs. âWell, I guess theyâll sell at least one pair.â
Itâs a joke. Probably meant to be harmless. But it hits you like a freight train. You feel it in your chest, in your jaw, in the old bruises sheâs left behind for years without even touching you.
You smile, tight-lipped. âRight. Because snowboarding isnât a real sport.â
âI didnât say that, Bear,â she counters quickly, sipping from a glass of wine. âBut come on. Even you know you couldâve gone far in football.â
Your hands freeze around your plate. Everyone else starts drifting away. They know that tone. Eli pulls a chair for someone. Your uncle suddenly remembers he has to check the grill. Only Alba stays close, watching you with wide, worried eyes.
âI did go far,â you say, steady. âJust in a different sport.â
Alexia shrugs. âYou were a great footballer. You had everything. And then you threw it away for a mountain and a board.â
You feel like youâre 12 again, standing at that dinner table with your fork clenched in your hand.
âI didnât throw anything away,â you snap. âYou just couldnât stand that I didnât want to be you.â
âBeing me wouldnât have been so bad.â
âNo?â You laugh, cold and sharp. âThen why did it feel like dying every time you looked at me like I disappointed you?â
Her eyebrows rise. âDonât be dramatic, Bear.â
And thatâs it.
You step forward. Voice rising. âYou werenât there when I moved into college. You werenât there when I won gold. You didnât even text me after I got won the ESPYâsâ
âI had games,â she says, arms folding.
âYou werenât there when I tore my ACL, Alexia.â
That makes her pause. âYou what?â
âYou didnât know,â you whisper, eyes burning. âYou didnât even know.â
âIâno one told meââ
âEveryone told you. Alba called. Mami texted. Iâm positive Olga told you. They sent you the scans. You were too busy at a menâs match posting selfies to notice.â
Alexiaâs jaw clenches. âThatâs not fair.â
âNo, whatâs not fair is being a teenager crying in a hospital bed wondering why her sister doesnât love her anymore.â
Olga moves to say something, but Alexia snaps, âYouâre twisting everything. Iâve supported you.â
âYou posted LucĂa for the award I won. You literally chose a teammate over your own sister.â Your voice cracks, rage and hurt bleeding through now. âHow many medals do I have to win before you give a damn? Fifty? A hundred? Or does it not matter unless Iâm in cleats?â
âYouâre wasting your potential,â Alexia says, almost yelling now. âYou couldâve been one of us. You had the talent. You had the name. And you threw it all away.â
And thatâthatâis the last straw.
Your voice drops. Dead calm. âIâm the most decorated snowboarder in Spanish history. Soon to be the most decorated in the world, I have eleven gold medals, two world records, and the goddamn Olympic Committee named a trick after me before I turned 20. And all I ever wanted was for my big sister to say âIâm proud of you.ââ
Alexiaâs mouth opens, but no sound comes out.
âInstead, you gave me silence,â you say. âOr worseâindifference. I spent half of my life waiting for you to care. I am done.â
Alba steps in, wraps an arm around your waist. Sheâs already crying. âLetâs go, mi amor. Letâs call JuJu.â
You let her guide you away. Youâre shaking, heart pounding, eyes glassy. Your hands tremble so hard you nearly drop your phone.
Meanwhile, Olga pulls Alexia into the side yard, away from the rest of the family. Her jaw is tight. Sheâs fuming.
âWhat the hell is wrong with you?â Olga demands. Her voice is low, lethal. âYou want to talk about wasted potential? Look at yourself.â
Alexia blinks, still stunned. âSheâshe blew up. Sheâs acting like a bratââ
âStop.â Olgaâs eyes narrow. âWhenâs the last time you even talked to her? Do you know how old she is?â
âSheâs⊠nineteen?â
âShe turned twenty last month.â
Alexiaâs stomach drops.
âDid you text her? Call her? Post about it?â
âI didnâtâshe didnât say anythingââ
âShe didnât say anything because youâve trained her not to expect anything from you!â Olga shouts now, voice cracking. âDo you even know how many medals sheâs won? Do you know what that award meant to her? That injury almost ruined her. She couldnât walk, Alexia.â
Alexiaâs breath hitches.
âShe cried over you. She begged for you to show up. And you couldnât even say her name in an interview.â
âI didnât meanââ
âExactly,â Olga cuts in. âYou didnât mean anything. Thatâs the problem. Sheâs your sister, Alexia. Not a failed version of you.â
Thereâs silence. Cold, stinging silence.
And then, finally, Alexia whispers, âI didnât know she was hurting that bad.â
âYou didnât want to know.â
And for the first time in years, something shifts behind Alexiaâs eyes. Not defensiveness. Not pride.
Regret. Real, bone-deep regret.
Olga sighs and looks away, her voice soft and bitter. âYou shouldâve fought for her.â
And AlexiaâLa Reina, unshakable, untouchable Alexiaâdoesnât say a word.
Because deep down, she knows. She didnât just lose her sister. She pushed her away.
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You spent your childhood drifting through foster homes, with nothing but a worn photo of two little girls and a note on the back: Your sisters, Alexia and Alba. You never imagined that at 25, after starting a new job, you'd meet them, through your boss who was your sister's girlfriend.
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Olga barrels through the hospitalâs automatic doors, breathless, her duffel bag still slung over her shoulder from the airport. Her eyes are wide with panic as she spots the group slumped together in the waiting room Alexia sitting forward with her elbows on her knees, Alba pacing back and forth, Eli quiet and pale beside her, and Patri⊠a wreck, tear-stained and motionless, like she hasnât breathed since the ambulance doors closed.
âIs she okay? What happened?â Olga blurts, her voice sharp with fear as she drops her bag with a loud thud.
Four pairs of eyes lift to her, but no one answers right away. Alba is the first to find her voice, raw and clipped. âWe donât know.â
Olgaâs face falls, her chest rising and falling faster. âWhat do you mean you donâtâ?â
Alexia cuts in, quiet but with an edge of exhaustion that speaks volumes. âShe stopped breathing. Our medical team got her back, barely. Then⊠her heart stopped again in the ambulance on the way hereâ
âThey had to resuscitate her twice,â Eli murmurs. Her voice is small. âThey wonât tell us anything else yet.â
Patri stays silent, eyes locked on the floor, hands clenched in her lap like sheâs holding herself together by threads. Olga looks at her, then back at the others, swallowing hard. âSo weâre just⊠waiting?â
Alexia nods. âWeâre just waiting.â She leans back in the chair, blinking quickly. âShe was fine. She was fine last night.â
Olga sinks slowly into the seat across from her, shaking her head in disbelief. âShe hides it when sheâs not okay.â
Alba kicks the chair leg in frustration. âWhy does she do that?â
No one has an answer.
Only the ticking of the clock on the wall and the occasional call over the hospital intercom fill the air now. Each second drags like an hour. Every time a nurse walks by, four heads snap up in desperate hope but no one comes for them yet.
A nurse steps in finally, clipboard in hand, scanning the room. âIs there an Olga RĂos here?â
Everyone turns. Olga jerks upright like sheâs been shocked, her voice caught in her throat. âYes yeah. Iâm Olga.â
The nurse offers a small, reassuring smile. âSheâs fine. Sheâs asking for you.â
Olga stares for a second, like sheâs not sure she heard right. Patriâs breath audibly catches, Alexia slumps forward in visible relief, and Alba covers her face with both hands as her knees buckle slightly. Eli lets out a shaky laugh thatâs more of a sob.
âSheâs ok?â Olga repeats, already crossing the room.
The nurse nods. âSheâs a little disoriented, and very tired, but stable. The doctor will speak to you all soon. Right now, she just wants to see Olga.â
Olga glances back at the group, stunned but steady now. She gives a slight nod, a promise to come back with more then follows the nurse down the hallway, her pace quickening with every step.
The room is dim, quiet but for the soft beeping of the heart monitor beside your bed. You look pale, lips cracked, skin clammy, but your eyes flicker open the moment Olga steps in. Relief softens her face instantly.
She crosses the room quickly, gently brushing a hand across your forehead. âYou gave us quite the scare there.â
Your voice is hoarse, almost too quiet to catch. âIâm never going to have sex again.â
Olga freezes, blinks. âWhat?â
You sigh, eyes closed again. âI finally sleep with Patri and I fucking die twice. Sheâs never going to touch me again.â
Thereâs a beat of stunned silence, then Olga makes an incredulous sound part groan, part laugh. âThatâs your biggest concern right now?â
You slowly turn your head to look at her, managing the faintest smirk. âIt was so good.â
That does it Olga lets out a laugh, covering her mouth with one hand as tears prick her eyes again, this time from sheer emotional whiplash. âJesus Christ, you are unbelievable.â
You smile faintly, a little smug despite the IV in your arm and the oxygen tube across your face. âI know.â
She sits on the edge of the bed, brushing your hair back again. âYouâre insane, but Iâm so glad youâre still here to be insane.â
You blink up at her, voice softer now, stripped of sarcasm. âIâve missed you.â
Olgaâs expression shifts gentler, warmer and she exhales like sheâs been holding her breath for weeks. Her hand finds yours on the blanket, squeezing it. âIâve missed you too,â she says, her voice thick with feeling. âAnd clearlyâŠâ she gives a pointed look, half amused, half exasperated, ââŠthereâs a lot to catch up on.â
You give a weak chuckle, trying not to wince. âYeah⊠turns out nearly dying twice in one night adds a few bullet points to the agenda.â
Olga rolls her eyes with affection. âStarting with âsex nearly kills meâ at the top of the list?â
You grin. âRight above âOlgaâs dramatic hospital entranceâ.â
She shakes her head with a smile, but her thumb gently brushes over your knuckles. âI really thought we lost you,â she says quietly. âDonât do that again.â
Your eyes meet hers, and for once, you donât deflect. âIâll try not to.â
Olga tucks your blanket a little higher, more out of instinct than necessity. Her voice is soft but steady. âYou want to know whoâs here?â
You nod faintly, eyes heavy but curious.
She sits back slightly. âAlexia hasnât left the waiting room since you were brought in. Albaâs pacing like sheâs trying to wear a hole in the floor. Patri looks like she hasnât taken a full breath since the ambulance came. And Eli landed back in Barca got Alexiaâs voicemail and come back the second she heard.â
You bite your lip, overwhelmed. âCan you⊠Can you get them? Just⊠not all the chaos, I canât do the noise right now.â
Olga rises, smoothing her hands down her thighs. âGot it.â She leans down, pressing her hand once more gently to your shoulder. âLet me do the talking first.â
She steps out into the hallway, and within seconds, the low buzz of anxious voices hits the air. You canât hear the words, but Olgaâs tone is calm, measured.
âSheâs fine,â she announces, âBut listen to me sheâs exhausted. Sheâs not ready for tears and drama and shouting, okay?â Her gaze flicks between them. âSo if you canât keep it calm, stay out here. She asked for you, but she needs peace.â
Thereâs a collective nod, a shared breath of relief, and then the door creaks open softly, and one by one Alexia, Alba, Eli, and Patri slip inside. They move quietly, careful not to disturb you. You lie there, eyes closed, looking peaceful but fragile, as if youâve drifted back to sleep.
Alexia steps closer first, her usual fierce energy softened by worry. Alba lingers near the doorway, glancing nervously between you and the others. Eli stands beside Patri, who is already holding back tears, her gaze fixed on you with a mixture of relief and fear.
None of them say a word at first they just watch you, as if afraid that even a whisper might shatter the fragile calm in the room.
Your eyes flutter open, still heavy with exhaustion, but you manage a weak smile as you see Alba sitting beside you. Her soft grin is the first thing you focus on, and the relief in her expression is impossible to miss.
She lets out a quiet breath of disbelief, then says with a playful edge, âAll this⊠just because I wouldnât watch Shrek with you?â
Your smile pulls a little wider, voice raspy but laced with teasing as you murmur, âHi, Ogre.â
Alba groans, tipping her head back, but she doesnât argue. âYou died, so Iâm letting that one go,â she mutters, pretending to be annoyed but you can see the glimmer of affection in her eyes. âOne time pass. One.â
Alexia stifles a chuckle nearby. Patri presses her fingers to her lips to stop herself from crying again. Even Eli wipes her eyes, mouthing, Ogre? to Alexia with a confused smile, but for a moment, itâs not about what happened itâs just the quiet joy of seeing you awake.
Alba gently brushes your hair back from your forehead. âYou look like shit,â she says softly, but her voice cracks, betraying how close she is to crying again. You give her a tired smirk, and she leans in to press a kiss to your temple. âNext time just text me Shrek and Iâll come running, okay?â
You nod, your throat tight.
Eli is next, holding your hand carefully like you might break again. âI was so scared,â she whispers, her eyes glassy. âYouâre not allowed to do that again, alright?â You squeeze her fingers as best you can, and she smiles through her worry, pressing a kiss to your knuckles before stepping aside for Alexia.
Alexia leans over you, her brows furrowed in a mixture of concern and relief. âYouâre tougher than I give you credit for,â she says, trying to keep it light, but her eyes are red from crying. âBut please⊠donât make me say goodbye to you like that again.â
You manage a whisper. âDid I at least look dramatic?â
Alexia huffs a shaky laugh, wiping her eyes. âYou were always the main character.â
Then itâs Patriâs turn. She doesnât say anything. She just walks up to your bedside and sits, leaning down pulling you gently into a quiet, trembling hug. Her arms wrap around you like she needs to make sure youâre real.
You feel her tears wet your neck before you hear the soft sound of her breath hitching.
âIâm sorry if I scared you,â you murmur into her shoulder, your voice the most fragile itâs been yet.
She pulls back slightly, her hand brushing your cheek, eyes red and filled with so much emotion it almost knocks the air from your lungs again. She gives a watery laugh, shaking her head as she wipes her face. âShut up and rest,â she whispers, and kisses your forehead.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
Inside the room, it's quiet just the low hum of machines. You're propped up slightly in bed, your hair messy, skin pale, but your eyes full of warmth as you look at Patri, whoâs seated beside you with one leg tucked under her, her fingers idly tracing soft patterns along the back of your hand.
You're smiling at something she just said a rare, genuine smile that even through the glass looks like it could bring the sun up.
Outside, Alba stands at the window, arms loosely folded, watching the two of you with a kind of wonder. Thereâs a gentle smile tugging at her lips. âAre they back together?â Eli asks from beside her, quiet, not wanting to disturb the moment even from here.
Olga glances at her mother-in-law, then back at the two of you. âErm⊠not sure,â she says, brow furrowed in thought. âShe hasnât really said anything.â
Alba, still watching, murmurs, âShe didnât stay in our room last night.â Eli raises a brow, glancing her way. âShe, um⊠had her episode in Patriâs room,â Alba explains softly, looking a bit uneasy remembering the panic of it. âSo I assumed she stayed with her. So maybeâŠâ
Inside the room, Patri brushes your hair behind your ear with a tenderness that makes Eliâs chest tighten, and you reach for her hand again, holding it like itâs your anchor. She leans closer, murmuring something that makes you chuckle breathless, but real.
âI donât think they ever really stopped being together,â Olga says finally, quietly and no one disagrees.
Patriâs fingers tighten slightly around yours as she looks at you, a soft kind of nervousness in her eyes not the panicked kind from hours before, but something far gentler. Her smile lingers, quiet and shy, the kind you rarely see from her.
âI have a question,â she says, voice hushed like itâs a secret between just the two of you.
You match her smile, head tilting just a little. âOkay.â
She hesitates not out of fear, but out of the weight of wanting to get it right. âWhen youâre better,â she says slowly, carefully, âcan we try again⊠properly? No second-guessing, no half in, half out⊠just us?â
Your smile softens further, your tired eyes holding hers, and your thumb brushes against her hand as you nod once. âYeah,â you whisper. âIâd like that.â
The tension Patri carried for weeks finally loosens in her shoulders. She leans forward, resting her forehead lightly against yours again, the same way she did the night before. âNo dying this time,â she whispers with a playful nudge of her nose against yours.
You grin faintly. âNo promises.â
Patri laughs gently, pressing her lips to yours. âAm I that good in bed that I made your heart stop?â
Your reaction is instant a full-on belly laugh that bursts out of you with no control. It shakes your body, catching you so off guard that it turns into a coughing fit.
Patriâs smile drops in an instant, panic flashing across her face. âHeyâhey, no, noâbreathe, cariñoââ
Your hand flails weakly in protest as you try to calm the coughs, still half-laughing. âIâm fineâjustâoh my godâyouââ you manage between gasps.
The door slams open and suddenly Alexia, Alba, Olga, and Eli come rushing in like a SWAT team. âWhat happened?!â
Albaâs eyes dart from you to Patri. âWhat did you do to her?!â
Still coughing, still laughing, you wave a hand again. âNo, no, stop, Iâm fine, I swearâPatri justâmade a joke.â
Alexia narrows her eyes, hands on her hips. âWhat kind of joke makes someone nearly die again?â
You wipe your watering eyes, trying to breathe through the last cough. âA very confident one,â you mutter, grinning toward Patri.
Patri, blushing and flustered now, just holds her hands up. âI didnât mean to kill her, okay?â
Olga presses a hand over her face to hide her smirk. âSheâs definitely feeling betterâŠâ
You make steady eye contact with Patri, a soft smile tugging at your lips. âThe first half was true,â you say quietly, voice low and honest. âSecond half⊠not so much.â
Patri raises an eyebrow, a smirk playing on her lips. âOh really?â she teases, her voice dropping into that flirty tone that makes your cheeks warm. âGuess Iâll just have to change your mind about the second half.â
Before you can respond, Alba lets out a dramatic groan from where sheâs leaning against the windowsill. âOkay, ew. Can you flirt when Iâm not in the room?â
You both glance over at her. Youâre trying not to laugh, and Patri just grins even wider, entirely unbothered. âNo promises,â Patri says without breaking eye contact with you.
Alba throws her hands up. âI almost preferred when she was unconscious.â
You giggle, wincing slightly at the lingering tightness in your chest. âBe nice. I technically died, you know.â
Alba crosses her arms with a sigh. âAnd came back just to gross me out with your romantic drama. Amazing.â
âAdmit it,â you tease her gently. âYou missed me.â
She huffs. âYeah, well. Maybe a little.â
Patri leans in with a soft smile and whispers, âFor the record, I missed you a lot.â
You glance at the clock on the wall, frowning slightly. âYouâre going to be late for your flight,â you say quietly, eyes finding Patriâs.
She falters, her expression clouding instantly. âIâm not going,â she says almost too quickly.
You reach for her hand, squeezing it gently. âGo. Iâll be fine. Youâve been excited for this trip with Cata and Pina for months.â
âThat was beforeââ
You cut her off softly. âPlease go on the holiday. Youâre only gone a few days, and Iâm stuck in here anyway. Iâm fine. I promise. Please go.â
Patri searches your face, visibly torn. She leans in and kisses you, slow and searching. âYouâre sure?â
âYes,â you whisper against her lips.
She kisses you again, longer this time and thatâs when Alba grabs her arm with a theatrical sigh. âOkay, kissy, she said go and sheâs sure. Off you go. I donât need to see you macking on my little sister like that.â
Patri pulls back, laughing. âI always thought it would be Ale whoâd hate that.â
Alexia is standing nearby, arms crossed, giving Patri a hard stare. âI do. I just have to show restraint. Iâm your captain, not just your friend.â
You smile weakly as Patri grabs her bag and gives you one last look, before she finally walks out the door but as it clicks shut behind her, the silence settles, heavier than expected. Your smile fades a little.
Olga takes the seat beside you, watching the door, then looking at you closely. âThis isnât you testing her, is it?â she asks gently.
You turn your head to her, surprised. âNo,â you say, voice steady but soft. âIâve done that already. She should go. Sheâs paid for it, been looking forward to it⊠no point in her sitting here with me, watching me nap and complain about hospital food.â
Olga places a hand over yours. âStill. Itâs okay to admit you didnât want to let her go.â
You lean your head back against the pillow, blinking slowly. âI didnât but itâs selfish to make her just sit hereâ
Olga squeezes your hand gently, her eyes soft. âYouâre braver than you think, you know.â
Eli leans against the doorframe of your hospital room, arms crossed but her expression soft. âWe need to check out of the hotel,â she says gently. âAlexia booked new rooms for us closer to here, so weâre moving over.â
Alba, whoâs been perched at the end of your bed flicking through her phone, looks up. âIâm going with her. Weâll grab everyoneâs bags and check out.â
You nod slowly, swallowing the lump rising in your throat. âYou donât have to do all this,â you murmur, your voice slightly hoarse. âReally. Iâm okay. Youâve all done so much already. You should go home, get back to normal. Donât put your lives on hold for me.â
Eliâs expression shifts, firm and maternal in a second. She walks further into the room, stopping at your bedside. âWe are not going home without you, cariño.â
Alba stands and crosses her arms, echoing the same stubborn look Alexia wears sometimes. âYeah, shut up. Weâre not leaving you, I've already told work I need to take some time off this week.â
You let out a soft, tired laugh. âYouâre all impossible, you know that?â
Eli smiles, brushing her hand over your blanket like a mother smoothing down a childâs covers. âWeâre family. That means when one of us goes down, the rest of us pitch a tent and wait it out.â
Alba adds, with a grin, âAnd if you think Iâm missing the moment you finally spill all to Olga about Patri, you're crazy, again, all very dramatic so you didn't have to tell me on the drive home.â
You throw a crumpled tissue at her, laughing even though your chest aches a little. âGo get the bags, Ogre.â
Albaâs face scrunches, but she lets the nickname slide again. âYou nearly died, Iâll allow it.â
Eli leans in and kisses your forehead before heading toward the door. âWeâll be back soon. Rest. No escaping.â
As they leave, you stare up at the ceiling for a moment, overwhelmed by both guilt and gratitude. You hate being the reason theyâre all rerouting their lives but you also know now that no one here is leaving you behind.
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Youâre sitting up in bed, tray balanced awkwardly in front of you. The hospital food some unidentifiable chicken with overcooked rice and a side of something pretending to be carrots sits mostly untouched. You try to force yourself to eat, poking at it with the fork like thatâll make it more appetising, but even the smell is making your stomach churn.
Olgaâs lounging in the chair by the window, scrolling on her phone, but you can feel her eyes flicking over to you every few seconds.
âEat something,â she says finally, not looking up.
âIâm trying,â you mutter, forcing a bite and immediately regretting it. You push the tray away slightly and rest your head back on the pillow. âUgh. Thatâs enough. Iâd rather die again than eat another fork of that.â
Olga snorts softly, putting her phone down. She looks at you, more serious now. âYou scared the hell out of us, you know.â
You nod slowly, eyes closed. âI know.â
Thereâs a long pause. Then, carefully, she asks, âWhatâs going on with you and Patri?â
Your eyes open again, and you look over at her. âWhat do you mean?â
âI mean⊠I walk into this room and the first thing you say to me is about sex with her,â she says, a small smirk playing on her lips. âThen I see the way she looks at you and the way you look at her when you think no oneâs watching.â
You sigh, your head tipping slightly to the side on the pillow. âItâs⊠complicated.â
Olga lifts an eyebrow. âDoesnât look complicated. Looks like two people who love each other and donât know what to do with it.â
âShe was so scared,â you say quietly. âI saw it in her face. I did that to her.â
âShe chose to love you,â Olga replies. âYou donât get to decide whether or not she can handle the worst parts of you. You just let her be there.â
You blink a few times, the sting in your eyes familiar now. âShe went on her holiday. I told her to go.â
âAnd she didnât want to leave you,â Olga says gently. âThatâs not nothing.â
You nod slowly, fiddling with the edge of the blanket. âI love her, O. So much it scares me.â
Olga gets up and sits on the edge of the bed beside you, her hand brushing over your hair. âThen donât push her away just because youâre scared. That girl looked like sheâd fight death itself to bring you back.â
You smile weakly, eyes glossy. âShe kind of did.â
Olga smiles back. âThen donât make her fight alone next time.â
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Youâre standing in your hospital room, slightly hunched, one hand gripping the IV pole while the other clutches the three sizes too big of joggers Alexia brought you to keep them up and some semblance of modesty. Electrodes are stuck across your chest and sides, wires snaking out in every direction, some looping to machines behind you, others being adjusted by your consultant whoâs murmuring quietly to a nurse. A blood pressure cuff inflates on your arm as another device beeps steadily.
Olgaâs sat in the corner chair, brow furrowed, arms folded tightly across her chest as she watches the scene unfold. âYou look like a cyborg,â she mutters under her breath, half concerned, half amazed. âAre you sure theyâre not trying to turn you into a machine?â
You give her a tired smile. âIf they are, itâs not working. Still very much falling apart.â
Just then, the door swings open and Alexia walks in, holding a drink tray with Alba trailing behind her carrying snacks and Eli following with a clean hoodie folded in her arms after you were sick on it this morning and it was your favourite that you definitely hadn't stollen from Patri.
They freeze in place. The silence stretches as their eyes move slowly over your body, landing on the scars that cross your chest and stomach, harsh lines of pale tissue evidence of too many surgeries. Albaâs jaw tightens. Eliâs face softens with a kind of quiet grief. Alexia looks stunned, guilt immediately washing over her features.
âIââ Alexia starts, but then falters. âSorry. We didnât mean to walk in on, this. Weâll come back.â
You shake your head immediately, voice hoarse but sure. âItâs fine. Honestly. I lost all my dignity the second they made me pee in a cardboard bowl while someone charted the colour.â
Alba lets out an awkward half-laugh as she steps further into the room. âThatâsâŠgross, thank you for sharing.â
âI aim to overshare,â you say dryly, nodding to the consultant who gives you a small smile and continues scribbling on his clipboard.
You ease yourself to sit on the edge of the bed, the wires shifting with you. âYou can stay. Iâd rather you did.â
Alexia gently places the tray on the windowsill, her eyes not leaving yours. âYou didnât tell us it was like this.â
You shrug, fiddling with one of the wires. âDidnât want to scare anyone.â
Eli steps forward, placing the hoodie down at the foot of your bed. âYou didnât scare us,â she says softly. âWe just didnât know.â
âI know,â you reply, quietly. âBut now you do. So⊠no going easy on me later.â
Alba sits down beside Olga and exhales slowly. âYouâre kind of a badass, huh?â
You smirk faintly, pulling the oxygen mask slightly straighter from your nose. âTook you this long to figure that out?â
The doctor glances up from the monitor and gestures toward you gently. âAlright, Y/N, I need you to stand again.â
You nod, already bracing yourself, hand clutching the IV pole as you ease off the bed. Every movement feels heavier than it should, your legs weak, your chest tight but you do it without complaint.
You wince as you feel the familiar cold burn of contrast dye being pushed through your IV. It snakes through your arm with a pressure that makes your eyes wet, your jaw clenched against the sting. You donât cry, but itâs close.
âYou know the drill,â the doctor says quietly, like itâs routine for both of you now.
You nod again, stepping slowly onto the treadmill positioned near the machines. Wires are draped from your chest, taped down in places, the beeping from the monitor already louder as your heart reacts to just standing.
The consultant turns slightly to address the others in the room Alexia, Alba, Eli, and Olga his tone calm, clinical, but not cold.
âSheâs had this test before, but weâre doing it again now that weâve had a second cardiac event,â he explains. âThe dye we just administered helps us track the blood flow through her heart in real time. What Iâm looking for now is whether there's a disruption, a narrowing, or a delay anywhere in the cardiac pathways that couldâve caused her heart to stop this morning.â
Albaâs face tightens at the word stop, and Alexia's arms are crossed over her chest, jaw clenched.
âSheâs being monitored very closely,â the doctor continues, gesturing toward the large screen nearby with a scrolling display of your heartbeats, sharp peaks and valleys, erratic but functioning. âThis part doesnât last long. She just needs to raise her heart rate slowly enough to simulate stress. We watch how the blood moves. Any interruption or stutter, and weâll see it.â
You look up at them from the treadmill, pale but focused.
âWeâre ready whenever you are,â the doctor says gently.
You nod once, tighten your grip on the bars, and start walking. Your feet hit the treadmill in a steady rhythm, arms gripping the side rails loosely as you focus on your breathing, your heart thudding in your ears. The machine ticks up gradually, pushing your pace gently, nothing too fast just enough to mimic the stress of daily movement, but within minutes, you feel it.
The tightness in your chest creeps in without warning, sharp and familiar. Your breath shortens, itâs like your lungs have shrunk to half their size. You blink rapidly, trying to clear the sudden wave of heat washing over your body, your legs falter.
The nurse monitoring you stiffens, eyes jumping to the numbers on the screen. âStopping the treadmill,â she says quickly.
The whirring halts and the belt slows. Before you can even take a step down, your knees nearly buckle.
âDoctorââ the nurse calls sharply.
Heâs already moving, in two strides, heâs at your side, helping the nurse ease you into the nearby chair. You slump into it, hunched slightly forward, one hand clutching your chest, the other gripping the armrest like it might ground you. Your face is pale, your lips losing color.
âIs this what happened this morning?â he asks, kneeling to your level.
You try to speak, but your breath is coming in shallow gasps, and your eyes are wide and terrified and are answer enough.
The doctor doesnât hesitate. He gently lifts the oxygen mask, placing it firmly over your nose and mouth. âItâs fine,â he says steadily, his voice calm in contrast to the rising panic youâre feeling. âTake a minute, Y/N. Donât fight it. Just breathe.â
You nod weakly, tears pricking at your eyes not from pain, but from fear. You can see Alba in your periphery, frozen, hand to her mouth. Alexiaâs fists are clenched so tightly at her sides her knuckles are white. Eli is whispering something rapid and low in Spanish to Olga, but you canât look at any of them now. You close your eyes behind the mask, focus only on the slow, cool hiss of the oxygen, and try to hold on to the sound of the doctorâs voice.
âYouâre okay,â he says again, gently. âJust breathe.â
You're trying to catch your breath, the oxygen mask pressed tightly to your face, when a sudden jolt punches through your chest. Itâs not pain exactly itâs deeper than that. It's a loss, a flicker, a switch being flipped.
The heart monitor beeps once, high-pitched, then silence.
Alba is the first to notice. âSheâs notâsheâs not breathing.â
The doctor snaps his head toward the monitor, eyes narrowing.
âSheâs in arrest! Code blue!â he shouts. âGet the crash cart!â
The room explodes into action. âEveryone out, now!â a nurse orders, already pulling gloves on, voice sharp with urgency, Alexia doesn't move no one does frozen in place, âI said out!â
Eli grabs her daughterâs arm and pulls her back as more staff rush in, the crash cart squealing against the linoleum. Albaâs face is frozen, tears spilling over. Olga stares, unblinking, before the nurse physically ushers her out too.
The door slams shut behind them, through the tiny window, they can only watch. You're motionless in the chair, your head tilted back slightly, mask dangling. Two nurses pull you onto the floor.
âStarting CPR!â someone yells inside.
The doctor begins chest compressions, fast and firm, counting under his breath as another nurse preps the defibrillator. The machine charges with a rising whine. Gel pads are applied.
âClear!â
Your body jerks violently with the shock. Outside, Alexia slams her fist into the wall. Alba buries her head into Eliâs shoulder. Olga is pacing, eyes wild, whispering a prayer under her breath.
Inside, the team works tirelessly, determined. âStill no rhythm,â a nurse calls out.
âAgain. Charging! clear!â
Another shock, the family canât hear whatâs being said, but they know. Theyâve done this before, they know what it means when everything goes quiet again and theyâre praying this time ends differently.
Olgaâs hands tremble as she scrolls through her phone, her thumb hovering over Patriâs contact. The hallway is thick with silence, broken only by the hum of the fluorescent lights and the quiet, erratic pacing of Alexia. Alba is curled in a chair, her knees drawn to her chest, Eli gently rubbing her back in a way thatâs more about keeping herself grounded than comfort.
Olga finally taps the screen.
The phone rings once. Twice. Three times.
âHola?â Patri answers, her voice light and muffled by background noise, waves, wind, laughter far away.
Olga swallows the lump in her throat. âPatri, you need to come back.â
Thereâs a pause. âWhat? Why? Is she okay?â
Olgaâs voice cracks. âNo. No, sheâs not. She had another cardiac arrest. It doesn't look good.â
The sound on Patriâs end goes silent instantly. Then, in a whisper, âIâm on my way.â She hangs up before Olga can say more.
Almost immediately, the door swings open, the doctor steps out, his scrubs streaked and damp with effort. His face is taut, his eyes grim.
âWeâre taking her for emergency surgery,â he announces, looking around at the gathered family. âThereâs been further complications with blood flow around her heart. Weâll know more soon but right now, itâs critical.â
Alexia stiffens. Alba covers her mouth.
âSheâs being prepped now. As soon as we know anything, weâll update you.â
Then motion the doors burst open again and nurses wheel you past quickly, monitors buzzing, IV bags swinging. You look... lifeless. Your skin pale and waxy under the bright hospital lights, tubes snaking from your arms and mouth. Your chest rises only slightly with the mechanical ventilation.
Alba turns away, unable to look. Eli gently touches Alexiaâs shoulder, and for once, she doesnât shrug it off. Olgaâs hand grips herself like itâs the only thing keeping her from sinking into the floor and falling apart.
Patri is thousands of miles away and youâre disappearing down a hallway none of them can follow.
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Your eyelids flutter open to sterile white light and the quiet beeping of machines. Thereâs a weight in your chest tight, foreign. Your throat burns, dry and raw, and as your eyes adjust, panic flickers through you when you realise you canât speak. The breathing tube is there, steady and intrusive.
You try to move, but your limbs feel heavy, your head woozy.
Then you see her Patri, sitting right beside you, eyes glassy with unshed tears, a soft smile trembling on her lips. She leans forward the moment she sees your eyes are open, taking your hand gently, her thumb running slowly over your knuckles.
You blink at her, overwhelmed, confused then a flicker of guilt hits you hard. Sheâs here. You remember her holiday, her excitement, the way sheâd lit up when she talked about it.
Tears prick your eyes, a muted frustration swelling as you weakly shake your head, your brows furrowed in a silent apology.
She squeezes your hand quickly, gently. âHey, hey,â she whispers, voice low, calming. âNone of that. Itâs okay. Iâm here.â She shakes her head immediately. âI didnât miss anything. Youâve just⊠been sleeping, princesa. Three days.â She smiles like itâs no big deal. âYou gave everyone a scare, but youâre doing better now, okay?â
Her other hand brushes your hair gently back from your damp forehead.
âRest, mi vida. Just rest.â
The room is dim, the soft rhythmic beeping of the monitor grounding you in the moment. Your body feels like lead, but your eyes stay locked on Patri who sits curled in the chair beside your bed, her hand never leaving yours.
She shifts slightly, brushing your hair back again with gentle fingers. Her touch is soft, delicate, like sheâs scared youâll break under too much pressure. You canât speak, but your eyes track her every movement, trying to say the things your mouth canât.
âTheyâve gone to the hotel,â she says quietly, glancing to the door like she half expects one of them to reappear. âEli looked exhausted. Alexia and Alba took her to rest. Theyâll be back soon, though. Everyoneâs just⊠waiting. Hoping.â
She turns back to you and sees the way youâre watching her, the way your eyes havenât left her face for even a second, her expression softens even more.
âI can keep talking,â she offers gently, a smile just barely curving the corners of her mouth. âNot sure Iâve ever done so much of it without being interrupted.â
You try to smile but itâs weak, your mouth barely cooperating, still, she sees it.
Patri leans closer, pressing her forehead gently to your temple for a long, grounding moment. âYou scared the shit out of me,â she whispers against your skin. âBut Iâm here, Iâm not going anywhere.â
Her thumb traces slow, reassuring circles over your hand again as she sits back, her gaze steady. You watch her like sheâs your lifeline because right now, she kind of is.
She speaks again, quiet but steady. âI'll never leave you Y/N, I've got you, we'll get you through thisâ as she strokes your hair, her fingers threading gently through the strands like sheâs memorising the feel of you, you blink slowly not from tiredness, but from how overwhelmed you are, with love, with gratitude and she knows. She doesnât need you to say it, she just keeps holding your hand, keeps talking softly, keeps being here.
The door clicks open softly and in walks your doctor, clipboard in hand, a warm but professional smile on his face. Patri straightens in her chair, her hand slipping gently from yours as she moves aside to give him room. You watch him carefully, your body still heavy, throat sore, and chest aching in a dull, distant kind of way.
âGood to see you awake,â he says, voice low but clear as he steps up beside your bed. âWeâre going to do a few checks, alright?â
You nod weakly, eyes flickering between him and Patri, whose fingers hover just beside your arm like sheâs not sure if she should touch you or stay out of the way. You want her to stay close, she always seems to know how to ground you.
The doctor lifts your gown with careful hands, checking the keyhole incisions along your chest and torso. The antiseptic stings slightly, but not nearly as much as the raw tenderness surrounding each site.
âMinimal bleeding. No signs of infection. Healing well,â he murmurs mostly to himself before glancing up at you. âNow for the breathing tube, youâre strong enough to come off it now.â
Your heart beats a little faster not in fear exactly, but with the anxiety of whatâs coming Patri leans in, brushing your hair back again as the nurse helps prepare.
âYouâll feel some discomfort,â the doctor warns kindly. âTry not to fight it.â
He gives a nod to the nurse, and with gentle but firm precision, he starts to remove the tube. It scrapes your throat on the way out, making you gag hard. Your eyes water instantly, chest spasming in response Patri is there immediately, holding your hand again, whispering soothing words you canât quite hear over the wheezing, coughing, and your own pulse rushing in your ears.
You gasp, your first full breath without the aid of the machine and it feels awful and amazing all at once.
âThere we go,â the doctor says calmly. âBreathe slowly. Deep, steady breaths. Youâre doing great.â
Your throat burns, your eyes sting, but youâre breathing on your own now.
And when your vision steadies, the first thing you see is Patri, eyes wide and glistening, a shaky smile pulling at her lips as she whispers, âYouâre incredible.â
The room is quieter now. The doctor and nurse exchange a few more notes in hushed tones, then offer a quick smile before stepping out, the soft click of the door closing behind them leaving just you and Patri alone again.
Youâre still adjusting to breathing fully on your own, your throat raw, chest aching from both the trauma and the surgery. But Patri stays with you through it all her fingers laced with yours, thumb brushing soft lines against your palm like itâs the most natural thing in the world.
She leans in a little, her other hand finding your cheek, gently cupping it. You turn into her touch like instinct, like oxygen.
You nod faintly, trying to swallow. âScared myself,â you rasp, voice like gravel and smoke.
Patri lets out a quiet, shaky laugh and leans closer, her forehead brushing yours and then, without warning, her lips find yours soft, slow, careful, but filled with all the panic, relief, and love sheâs been holding back.
The kiss isnât perfect itâs clumsy and tentative with the breathing tube just gone, but itâs real. She pulls back just enough to look you in the eye.
It was the first day of my new coffee shop and bakery opening and I was beyond excited to serve every pastry that I made this morning. It was always my dream to open one of these places in London so being here and arranging everything was the best feeling ever.
I was sitting behind the counter reading a book while waiting for the first customers to arrive. I carefully dusted every table, chair and shelf which had books in it for people to grab and read in the shop or just as a decoration.
It took maybe about ten minutes before the doors to my shop opened and the ring above the door signaled that someone walked in. I looked up from my book carefully placing it near the register and smiled at the four girls that just walked in.
They were talking to each other while taking in the entire place. One of them seemed too excited when she spotted I had fresh pastries as well.
âOh my god Steph look at those croissants we have to have them.â I heard her say to the other girl as they approached me.
âHey, welcome in, what can I get you?â I asked with a smile on my face.
The brown hair girl, Steph I assumed, smiled at me: âHey, can we get two lattes, one flat white and one green tea to go please?â I nodded: âIs that all?â
âOh and four of those please.â She pointed to the chocolate croissants behind the glass.
âOf course, will you want them to go as well?â I asked as she nodded and went to get me her card but I stopped her: âNo, itâs on the house. You are my first customers.â
âWell, thank you but I will pay anyway.âShe smiled but yet again I didnât let her: âNo, like I said, itâs in the house. You can sit down anywhere you want. I will call you over when your drinks are ready.â With that I turned away from her but I caught the glimpse of her putting paper money into the tip jar I set onto the counter next to the register.
I rolled my eyes smiling and started to prepare their drinks and put the croissants thoughtfully into the paper bags.
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âHere is your order.â I said as the other blond girls walked towards me collecting the items.
âYou have it very pretty in here.â the tall blond girl said to me with a smile which I quickly returned: âThank you very much. Come back any time.â
âWe definitely will. You are the new best place for hang outs after training.â I didnât know what they were training for but it was great to hear them saying they are going to be returning again.
âWell, I hope your training is going to go great today. Have a nice day.â
âYou too.â With that the group walked away closing the door behind them. I exhaled the breath I didn't know I was holding until they left.
After I cleaned the counter and the coffee machine I sat back down and returned to my book waiting for the next new people to discover my place.
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âEnjoy your drinks and have a lovely rest of the day.â I said as I handled the drinks to the last customers for today. I walked them out and turned the sign on the door signaling to the people that itâs closed. I locked the door and began to sweep the floor and clean the tables.
I was in my own world listening to the soft jazz music playing from the speakers around the cafe, when I heard a knock on the door. I turned around and went to say that we are closed but then I saw who it was. It was the brown hair girl named Steph from the morning.
She waved at me and then frowned as she read the sign on the door. Her mouth fell open as she went to apologize but I quickly unlocked the door: âHey, do you need anything?â
âSorry, I didn't see the sign, I just wanted to buy one more croissant, but I won't bother you when you are already closed.â She rambled as I chuckled softly and opened the door wilder: âCome on in.â
Her cheeks turned a bit pinker as I closed the door behind her, locking it again, turning her way and motioned for her to follow me towards the back: âI am sold out, but I have two more saved, come with me.â
She slowly walked behind me as I let her towards my kitchen where I baked this morning. I walked through the door while looking back making sure she was following me.
I opened the cabinet next to the fridge and pulled out two chocolate croissants which I put there this morning, making sure they were kept fresh.
I handed them to her: âHere, all yours.â She carefully took them from my hands, our fingers brushing softly against each other.
âUhm, thank you. How much for these?â
I waved my hand: âYou already paid for them with the tip you put in the jar.â
âBut, that was for the morning order.â
I smiled: âLike I said THAT was in the house.â
She blushed a little: âOkay miss stubborn. How do you do them? They were so good. All of us were amazed by the taste.â
âItâs a secret.â I said while I leaned on the counter. It was now her time to chuckle: âLet me guess, the main ingredient is love.â
I laughed: âWell, of course it is one of them. But it might be that they were baked in the morning so they were still nice, warm and fresh.â
âWait, you made them this morning before you opened? When did you wake up?â She sounded like she didn't believe me.
âI wake up around four am to prepare everything and I open at six thirty so they have time to cool down as well.â
âYou want to do that every day?â
I smiled and nodded: âBelieve it or not, I do enjoy the process. It is a part of why I opened this place, and I don't have to travel here. My apartment is right above this place. So when I put them in the oven I go back to sleep for a while and then come back here to check on them.â
âThat is truly amazing. I admire you for thatâŠâ She looked at me like she was searching for my name.
âY/N.â I stuck out my hand for her to shake, which she did: âI am Steph.â
âNice to meet you Steph.â She smiled at me as I did the same.
We talked some more before her phone rang and she had to go home. I walked her towards the door letting her out: âI can teach you to make something if you want.â I offered it to her because she seemed sincerely interested in what I do.
âWait, for real?â
âYeah, of course. Come here tomorrow if you have time around this time and I can teach you how to make these.â I pointed towards the croissants in her hand.
She smiled: âOkay, thank you. And thank you for these.â and just like that she was gone. Leaving me wondering while I suddenly missed her presence.
As I was placing them behind the glass showcase I heard the first customer walk in. It was the same blond girl from yesterday who came with Steph but this time she was alone.
âGood morning.â I said as I placed the last sfogliatella onto the plate.
âGood morning, uh, you are killing me with those pastries. They look so good. If I have another one before the training my coach is going to kill meâŠunless I bring her one as well.â I laughed softly as I cleaned my hands with a towel I had near me.
âThey are nice and fresh, I just took them out from the oven like half an hour ago.â I explained as she nodded.
âThey look lovely, I will take four to go please. Oh and three lattes with it.â
I nodded and added everything to the register: âCash or card?â She pulled out her card making me nod and added it to the terminal letting her pay.
âIt will be with you in a minute.â I said and quickly started to work on the coffees.
âAlso, Steph asked me to tell you that she has to cancel the plans you two had? I am not sure what but she has to go with Calvin for a check up.â she said to me, making me pause a little and pursed my lips. Who the hell is Calvin?
âYeah, okay. Thanks for letting me know.â I said as I handed her the coffee, now taking out a box to put the pastries in.
âI am Beth by the way.â
âI am Y/N. Here is your order. And say to Steph I said Hi." I handed her the box.
She nodded: âI will. Thank you. Have a nice rest of the day y/n.â
I sighed: âYou too BethâŠyou too.â
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The day felt longer after I got the news that Steph had to cancel our plans. I was so excited to show her how to bake. I even brought fresh raspberries to make some raspberry croissants. But I didnât let the disappointment show. I served the other customers with a smile on my face even though I was feeling a bit down.
After I sweeped the floor again and arranged everything, also making sure I locked the door I went upstairs to my apartment. I flopped down onto my coach and let out a sign, taking out my phone to answer some of the texts I had there since the morning.
One of the texts was from my best friend Vanesa:
Girl, you won't believe what I have!
I sighed and answered with a bunch of question marks.
Tickets for tomorrow's Arsenal women's game.
I rolled my eyes and smiled. She wasn't even in London, not alone a football fan.
Since when are you IN London and ARE a football fan?
I waited a few minutes for a reply and in the meantime I started to make some pasta with pesto for dinner.
Well, I am not but hey, you can take the Steph girl you told me about yesterday.
I huffed and texted her back:
I don't have her number and she canceled our plans for today. I am also not that much into football. I don't even know who plays for them. It would be embarrassing to invite her for something I have no idea about.
As I took the pesto out of my fridge and placed it next to me I heard notification from Vanesa pop up.
Well, here. Look at their instagram and just go alone or find a friend! I sent you the tickets to your mail.
You are unbelievable. But I have to pass. I want to explore the city a bit.
You are so stubborn! But okay, be my guestâŠI am still going to send them through.
I rolled my eyes and put the pasta into a bowl. I love Vanesa with all my whole heart but she can be a pushover sometimes. She definitely got the tickets for me to make a move on Steph, but I didnât even know she liked me. We saw each other onceâŠokay twice but still.
As I ate my pasta I let my eyes wander to the link for the Arsenal womens instagram she sent me. I clicked on it and was immediately met with hundreds of photos from their games and training. I put a handful of pasta into my mouth as I scrolled through the photos.
As my eyes land on Steph. I nearly choked on the pasta as I inhaled some air quickly. I grabbed the water I had on my table and took a sip.
It was a photo of Steph, Beth and the other two girls they were with yesterday.
Oh my god. Not only Steph knew about football more than meâŠshe was indeed a footballer.
I pursed my lips as my finger pointed onto the photo, hoping that she was tagged in the photo. And of course she was. I opened her profile, took a deep breath in and gave her a follow.
Great, now I am going to look like a stalkerâŠ
But to my suprise, a few minutes later she followed me back.
stephcatley: stalker much?
I pursed my lips and was going to answer when my phone screen went black.
You spent your childhood drifting through foster homes, with nothing but a worn photo of two little girls and a note on the back: Your sisters, Alexia and Alba. You never imagined that at 25, after starting a new job, you'd meet them, through your boss who was your sister's girlfriend.
Word count: 9k
â ïž This comes with a warning đ
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The phone rings only once before Patri picks up like she was already holding it, like maybe she still keeps you the only person set to ignore the do not disturb she always has on, even now.
Her voice is cautious but soft, immediately alert. âY/N?â
You donât speak at first. You try, but your throat is too tight, your voice caught somewhere between panic and exhaustion. All that comes out is a shaky breath.
Thatâs enough Patriâs voice lowers, gentle but steady like the ground beneath you just got a little more solid. âHey. Itâs okay. Iâve got you. What do you need?â
You still canât explain it. Canât bring yourself to shape it into words you donât even know what you need, but your voice finally cracks through the pressure. ââŠCan you come over?â
Thereâs no hesitation, not even a beat. âYeah. Iâm already grabbing my keys.â You hear the clink in the background keys, door, a muttered âVicky, Iâll be back laterâ then her voice returns, quieter now, but somehow more certain. âIâm on my way. Donât worry, okay?â
You manage a whisper. âIâm scared.â
That silence holds for half a breath not because she doesnât know what to say, but because she wants to say it right. âI know, but Iâm coming. Iâve got you, cariño. Just hang on a little longer.â
She doesnât ask for details, she doesnât push, she doesnât need to. She heard it in your voice something broke loose inside you and started flooding out, and all she cares about now is getting to you.
You hang up without saying goodbye, knowing sheâll be there.
And she will be, because no matter how messy or distant things have gotten, sheâs always shown up when it counted and tonight, you didnât need her to fix anything. You just needed her.
The knock comes quicker than expected sharp and urgent. You barely got the chance to sit down again after your panic call.
You call out, voice low but steady now, âItâs open.â
The door swings open with more force than necessary, and Patri storms in like she was ready to fight off an intruder keys still clenched in her hand like a makeshift weapon, eyes wild and scanning.
âY/N?â she says quickly, stepping fully inside, breath just a little uneven. âWhat happened? Are you okay? Where are you?â
You step out from around the corner, a little sheepish, and point toward the ceiling near the window. âThereâs a spider.â
Patri stares at you for a long, stunned second jaw slack, chest still heaving slightly from sprinting up the stairs like her life depended on it. She blinks. âA⊠spider.â
You nod slowly. âA big one.â
Thereâs a pause where you swear you can actually see the tension in her body trying to process whether to be furious, relieved, or amused. Patri exhales through her nose, visibly trying to remain composed but the twitch at the corner of her mouth gives her away, âYou sounded like someone had broken in.â
âWell technically, the spider did,â you say weakly. âIt certainly wasnât invited.â
She closes her eyes for a moment, shaking her head, and when she opens them again, the panic is gone, replaced with dry amusement.
âI left Vicky mid-sentence and ran four red lights.â
You bite your lip to stop the laugh bubbling up. âSorry?â
She gives you a long look, then slowly, dramatically pulls off her jacket and tosses it on the back of a chair. âWhere is it?â she asks, squinting toward where you pointed.
âCeiling. Top right corner. It moved once.â
âIâm risking my life for this, you know.â
âYouâre very brave.â
Patri grabs a magazine off your table with unnecessary determination and marches toward the window.
You stand behind her at a safe distance like the coward you are.
âYou owe me so hard for this,â she mutters but sheâs smiling now, and despite everything, itâs the softest sheâs looked at you in days.
Even though youâve clearly ruined her night and interrupted whatever plans she had, she handles the spider without complaint, because she always shows up even when itâs just for a spider and a scared voice on the phone.
Patri lifts the magazine gently, the spider inching along its edge like it has no idea itâs just narrowly avoided a death sentence.
You flinch instinctively, keeping a solid few feet of distance between you and her. âKill it.â
She glances back at you, eyebrows raised. âNo. Iâm not killing it.â She starts toward the balcony.
âItâs just going to come back in,â you protest.
âIt wonât.â Her voice is firm, like sheâs the spokesperson for all spider-kind. âItâs more scared of you than you are of it.â
You scoff. âI doubt it.â
She shoots you a look over her shoulder, opening the sliding glass door. âOh it is,â she says. âItâs seen how crazy you are.â
Your jaw drops. âExcuse me?â
She carefully taps the magazine so the spider drops down onto the balcony floor and scurries away. She straightens and turns to you with a smug smile. âHonestly, if I was that spider, Iâd need therapy after this stunt.â
You narrow your eyes, arms crossing. âYou didnât have to come, you know.â
She shrugs, stepping back inside, letting the door slide closed.
âBut I did.â Then, softer, âYou sounded scared.â
You pause, caught off guard again by how easily she shifts from teasing to gentle.
She sets the magazine down and walks past you toward the kitchen. âYou got anything to drink that isnât poison, I can take for the road that was such thirsty workâ she reappears with one of your cold diet cokes from the fridge.
You watch her for a second, then finally exhale, the tension in your shoulders loosening as her presence settles the apartment back into something that feels like safety, even if she just called you crazy.
You follow Patri to the door, your hands fidgeting with the hem of your sleeve, nerves still humming slightly not from the spider anymore, but from her.
She moves slowly, like sheâs waiting for you to say something. At the door, she turns halfway, her body angled toward you. âThanks⊠for coming,â you say, voice quieter than you mean it to be. âI know itâs stupid.â
Patri shakes her head gently, her expression soft. âIt wasnât stupid. You called, I came. Thatâs it.â
You offer a small, lopsided smile. âStill. Thank you.â
For a second, neither of you move. The distance between you is small, but the silence makes it feel bigger. Then she meets your eyes fully, really looks at you, and something shifts.
Patri leans in slowly, giving you time to move, to stop her, but you donât. You stay right where you are as her lips press against yours soft, steady, familiar in a way that makes your chest ache. Itâs not long. Just enough.
When she pulls back, you see the flicker of panic in her eyes regret, maybe, or restraint. Her brows knit slightly, and she whispers, âIâm sorry.â
You swallow, your heart beating in your throat. âItâs okay.â
She nods slowly, holding your gaze one last second before turning and stepping out the door. You watch it close behind her, the quiet settling in her absence but the feel of her kiss lingers, like a warmth on your skin youâre not ready to brush away.
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The sky is bright blue and clear when you pull up, the engine humming low as you double-check the playlist and the coffee in your cup holder. The streets are mostly empty, the city not quite awake yet a perfect quiet before three hours of Alba. You were driving Alba and yourself to Huesca for the Copa del Reina final
She appears in the doorway dragging a small suitcase and a very large iced coffee, dressed like sheâs about to be snapped by paparazzi, sunglasses too big, hoodie too low, leggings and a tiny, perfectly curated frown.
You roll down the window. âWow,â you call, grinning. âYou really went full celebrity on me.â
She gives a mock bow, then gestures to the back of the car. âPop it. Iâm not lifting with one hand. This coffee is more important than life right now.â
You laugh and hit the release. She throws her suitcase in, then climbs in the passenger seat without a word.
For a minute, thereâs only the sound of your playlist starting up soft, low, safe. Then, after taking a long sip of her drink, she speaks, âSo⊠this is weird, huh?â
You smile without turning to her. âExtremely.â
âGood,â she nods. âAs long as we agree.â
20 minutes in.
The tension eases the further you get from the city. Alba has her feet on your dashboard, despite your protests, and she's already made three comments about your music taste being 'worryingly moody.'
You countered by switching to a girl group ballad from 2008 that made her grimace, but she didnât skip it.
Somewhere past Terrassa, she glances at you and says, âYou nervous?â
You blink. âAbout what?â
âSpending this long alone with me. Talking. Potentially sharing snacks.â
You raise an eyebrow. âOh no, Iâve emotionally prepared myself. I even packed backup snacks in case you start gatekeeping the good ones.â
She snorts, nodding slowly. âSmart. Very little sister of you.â Thereâs a beat. Then she adds, a little quieter, âFeels weird, doesn't it? Like⊠we missed the whole part where we were supposed to fight over clothes and annoy each other during puberty.â
You glance at her, then back at the road. âYou say that like youâre not incredibly annoying.â
She grins but thereâs something else in her voice when she adds, âI just⊠Iâm glad weâre doing this.â
You let the silence sit for a moment before replying. âYeah. Me too.â
An hour in.
The mood shifts again. Sheâs leaned her seat back, one leg tucked up beneath her, scrolling through your music and making quiet commentary.
âPatri text you yet?â she asks, eyes still on your phone screen.
You glance at her, caught off guard. âYou have my phone you tell me.â
Alba nods slowly, like she knew the answer already. âHave you spoken to her at all?.â
âLittle bit,â you reply, carefully, eyes on the road, "Nothings changed"
âYou sure?,â she murmurs.
You shoot her a look. âWhy do I get the feeling everyoneâs been having secret conversations about my love life?â
She gives you a slow, too-innocent smile. âBecause they have.â You groan. âBut donât worry,â she says, patting your arm. âOn this trip, we talk about us. Not your tragic dating life.â
You snort. âFine, but Iâm gonna need another coffee if Iâm gonna survive your version of sibling bonding.â
âDone,â she says, already pointing ahead. âNext town, we'll stop for food. You get coffee, but if you come back with fruit, I will abandon you on the side of the road.â
You grin, despite yourself and as the kilometres slip by, so does the awkwardness.
2 hours in
The sunlightâs turning gold, casting long shadows across the dashboard as you pull into a parking space just off the main road. You both have greasy paper bags of Burger King in your laps, the car filled with the comforting smell of fries and warm bread. Alba already has mayo on her hoodie and no shame about it.
You unwrap your burger slowly, watching a few birds circle lazily overhead through the windshield.
Alba takes a big bite, chews, swallows, then looks at you. âYou miss her?â
You pause your fingers still holding half the bun mid-air.
She doesnât push, just watches you with that too-serious look she gets sometimes, the one that reminds you sheâs seen more than she says.
You sigh, set the burger back on the wrapper in your lap, and lean your head against the headrest. âYeah,â you say, finally. âI do.â
Alba doesnât say anything for a moment, just crunches on a fry and nods like she expected the answer but wanted to hear it from you.
âIs it the sex thing?â she asks casually, and you turn to glare at her. âBecause Ale saidââ
âOh my God,â you groan. âDo you all have like a group chat or something? Y/Ns sex watch party 2025?â
Alba laughs, nearly choking on her drink. âDonât flatter yourself. Itâs more like Drama Monitoring Services.â
You shake your head but youâre smiling now, even as your stomach tugs at the topic. After a moment, you say, quietly, âI think she wanted me, but she didnât know how to want me in the way I needed.â
Alba leans back, sipping her drink. âAnd did you ever tell her how you needed to be wanted?â Youâre quiet. âYeah,â she says, shrugging. âThatâs what I thought.â
You look over at her, frowning. âWhat, are you a relationship expert now?â
âNope,â she grins. âI just donât want you to keep pretending she broke your heart when you handed it to her with the manual missing. I reckon the first chance you get, just fuck her, solves all the issues thenâ
You stare at her, floored by the honesty, then laugh not because itâs funny, but because it hurts in that true kind of way. You nod. âI actually miss her.â
âThen do something about it,â Alba says, brushing salt from her fingers. âOr donât, but donât sit in this car acting like you didnât feel loved just because it didnât end with fireworks and lingerie.â
You stare at the horizon for a moment. âWow,â you murmur. âYouâre kind of wise.â
âI contain layers,â she says, deadpan, then immediately drops a fry in her lap and yells âShit!â
You both burst out laughing, "Alba the Ogre"
"huh?" she turns her head to you and the expression on her face is like you've sprouted a second head
You glance over. âShrek.â
She frowns. âIâve never seen that.â
You slam the brakes, figuratively, but the gasp you let out is nothing short of betrayal. âYouâve never seen Shrek?!â
Alba looks confused, even a little defensive. âNo? I donât know, it just never looked that good.â
You turn to fully face her in your seat. âTake that back. Right now.â
She raises an eyebrow. âItâs an ogre movie. With a donkey.â
âThat ogre movie is a cinematic masterpiece. It has layers, like onions and parfaits, and you won't even get that reference because you haven't seen it.â
Alba laughs. âYouâre actually upset.â
âIâm furious,â you say. âI donât even know how weâre related right now. What were you doing in 2001 when the world changed forever?â
"l was four,â she says flatly.
âAnd failing at life, apparently.â You shake your head. âThereâs romance, thereâs action, thereâs Eddie Murphy singing about waffles. Alba, I canât explain Shrek to you. You have to feel it.â
She looks at you, amused. âYou want to put it on in the hotel later?â
âI want to put it on right now,â you say. âThis road trip is cancelled. Weâre going home, you canât be trusted.â
Alba grins, finally a little sheepish. âFine. You can show me, but only if thereâs no singing along.â
âNo deal,â you say immediately. âI will be singing, loudly and you will be emotionally moved by Hallelujah when it plays, or Iâm leaving you at a petrol station on the way home.â
She rolls her eyes but smiles. âYouâre insane.â
âAnd you,â you say with great drama, âare culturally bankrupt. I was one when that movie came out and even I've seen it, you have no excuseâ
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You and Alba make your way through the crowds at Huesca stadium the Barcelona fans loud already, your matching sunglasses doing little to hide the fact you both look slightly road-weary but buzzing. Alba walks ahead of you with the practiced confidence of someone used to navigating stadiums, but you can tell even sheâs excited thereâs a bounce in her step that wasnât there earlier.
You finally reach the family section, flashing your passes at security and he waves you through, you spot Eli first, seated near the front, scanning the pitch like sheâs mentally coaching from the stands. Sheâs dressed casually, but her whole posture is alert, focused, maternal. Probably nervous.
Then she looks up and freezes, her eyes land on you and Alba together, side by side, and for a second, her mouth actually falls open in a silent, stunned kind of happiness. She stands immediately, hands over her chest like she needs to make sure sheâs not imagining things. Alba grins and waves, you offer a small, awkward one of your own.
âMi niña,â Eli breathes, moving to greet you both at the aisle. âWhatâwhat are you doing here?â
âWe thought weâd surprise you and Ale,â Alba says casually, like itâs no big deal, but you can hear the warmth behind it, the meaning. She throws an arm around your shoulders and squeezes.
Eliâs eyes flicker to you, wide and glassy. âI didnât thinkââ
You shrug a little, trying not to make it a big emotional moment, but your voice still comes out quieter than you expect. âAlba said she wanted company and, I wanted to see Alexia play.â
âSheâs going to be so happy,â Eli murmurs, then steps in and hugs you both tightly, one arm around each daughter. âThank you for coming.â
You sit between them once you're settled Eli to your left, fussing with her sunglasses, and Alba to your right, bouncing her knee with silent energy. The pitch below is alive, the players warming up under the late afternoon sky, and you spot Alexia easily in the distance, her ankle still taped up but dressed in full kit, talking with teammates near the bench.
âShe doesnât know either of us are here?â you ask quietly.
Eli shakes her head. âShe thought it would just be me. Iâm sure sheâll spot you both soon.â
You nod, feeling a little strange nervous, even, not in a bad way. Just unfamiliar, like being part of something youâve spent your whole life picturing.
Then Alexia jogs toward the touchline, glancing up at the crowd probably looking for Eli. She finds her first, then her gaze lands on Alba and then you.
She stumbles mid-step and breaks into the widest, stupidest, most gleeful smile youâve ever seen her wear. Itâs not cool or composed at all. Itâs just joy.
She waves frantically, mouthing something thatâs probably âWhat the hell?â at Alba, then pointing at you with mock offence. You smile right back.
Alba leans in and says quietly, âWorth the drive?â
You glance back at Alexia beaming like an idiot on the sideline, then over at Eli, whoâs wiping her eye subtly like she isnât. âYeah,â you admit, voice low. âIt really is.â
After warm-ups, as the players begin drifting toward the tunnel, Alexia peels off from the group and jogs over toward the family section her eyes locked on you like she's half afraid you'll disappear if she looks away.
She slows just before the barrier, cheeks still flushed from movement, her ponytail bouncing slightly as she beams up at you. She glances at Alba first, offering her a quick high five and a mouthed âhello,â before her gaze shifts back to you.
"You came," she says, almost in disbelief, eyes scanning your face like she still canât believe itâs real. Then, softer, "You okay? You look⊠tired."
You swallow the lump in your throat, not from her concern but from how seen it makes you feel. Even with the chaos of the final, even with her ankle not at a hundred percent she still noticed. You force a small smile and shake your head, brushing it off. âIâm fine. Itâs just the drive.â
Alexia studies you a second longer, not totally convinced, but she doesnât press. Instead, she leans a little closer across the barrier, grinning.
âI canât believe youâre here,â she says again, eyes crinkling at the corners. âDonât leave at halftime, yeah? I need to show off in front of you.â
You scoff gently, crossing your arms. âFocus on the final, not showing off.â
She gives you a wink, backing up. âSame thing.â Then she turns, jogs backward a few steps, and just before disappearing down the tunnel, shouts, âSave me a drink at the after party!â
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The stadium is electric drums pounding, cheers echoing from the stands, a wave of blue and red cascading over the crowd like a tide of pride. You watch from the family section as the final whistle blows, and Barça players collapse into one another, elated, exhausted, victorious.
Alba nudges you hard in the side. âThey did it,â she says, grinning wide, almost like a kid.
You nod, eyes already on Alexia sheâs somewhere in the middle of the huddle, half-laughing, half-crying as her teammates drape themselves over her, shouting, singing, celebrating. Her hair is stuck to her forehead with sweat, her ankle still lightly taped under her sock, but she doesnât care.
You feel your breath catch as she steps forward. She takes the Copa de la Reina trophy in both hands, shares a moment with her teammates getting them fired up, and lifts it high into the air.
The lights hit it just right gold gleaming, confetti beginning to fall and she throws her head back and roars, primal and full of joy. You feel it deep in your chest, that pride, that strange, soft ache that says youâre part of this somehow, even from the sidelines.
Eli claps loudly beside you, tears in her eyes, and Alba is on her feet cheering, but your eyes never leave Alexia and hers even through all the noise, the lights, the photographers manage to find you.
Just for a moment itâs brief, but you see it that soft flicker of recognition, a smile not just for the crowd or the cameras, but for you.
You smile back, eyes stinging a little, your voice too full to shout but your heart is louder than any noise in that stadium.
You step down onto the field beside Eli and Alba, your pass still hanging around your neck, the noise somehow both deafening and muted as your eyes scan the sea of jubilant players and there she is, Patri.
Laughing, arms flung around a teammateâs shoulders, bouncing on the balls of her feet like the win has filled her up with helium. Her hair is wild from the match, cheeks flushed, and she looks alive. Radiant, in that unfiltered way joy makes people beautiful, she doesnât even know sheâs glowing she never does.
You freeze for a second, because your heart traitorous, familiar, honest flutters the moment you see her. Sheâs still in her kit, socks rolled low, mud spattered on her thighs, and she hasnât seen you yet, but Eli nudges you forward gently.
You step forward slowly, the sounds around you going a little soft again as Patri turns, she sees you, stops mid-spin and for a second the world seems to slow. Her eyes widen just a little, like maybe she wasnât expecting you, or maybe she didnât let herself hope to. Her grin falters not because sheâs not happy, but because sheâs surprised in a way that hits deep.
Then it returns full force, bright and unguarded. You donât even realise youâre walking toward her until your feet are already carrying you forward and sheâs doing the same steps hesitant at first, then more certain with each stride until you're meeting halfway, just like muscle memory, like itâs always been this simple.
Neither of you says anything, you just fall into each other, arms wrapping tight like this is the only place either of you has exhaled in weeks. Your face tucks into the crook of her neck, and her cheek presses against yours, both of you clinging a little too hard but neither pulling away.
You feel her breathing and for a second, the noise of the stadium falls away completely. She smells like grass and sweat and whatever bubblegum sheâs been chewing during the match. Her fingers grip at your back like sheâs afraid if she lets go, sheâll wake up and itâll all have been imagined.
âWatch those hands, Guijarro!â Alexiaâs voice cuts through the moment, teasing, smug and loud from behind you.
Patri groans without lifting her head. âFor once, Ale, can you not?â
You turn your face enough to glance back over your shoulder, where Alexia is grinning from ear to ear, leaning against the barrier with her arms crossed, ankle clearly wrapped up still, smug as hell. Eli is beside her, pretending to scold her but very obviously holding back a laugh.
âI will not be silenced,â Alexia declares, mock-offended. âMy little sister is out here getting felt up by one of my oldest friends. Iâm just protecting the families honour!â
You bury your face in Patriâs shoulder, muffling a laugh as she mutters, âSheâs the worst.â
âShe really is,â you whisper back.
Patri eases back just enough to look at you, her hands still resting on your waist, thumbs rubbing small circles through your jacket. âyou doing okay?â she says, eyes searching your face,
You nod and because sheâs Patri, you manage a real smile. âYeah. Better than when you found me cowering because of a spider.â
She laughs, rolling her eyes. âI will never forget the sound you made.â
âIt was a very aggressive spider,â you insist.
âSo aggressive it needed a panic call and a professional footballer on emergency duty?â she teases.
âExactly,â you say, and you both dissolve into quiet laughter.
The movement makes the medal on her chest clink softly. You reach out and straighten the ribbon, letting your fingers brush the cool metal.
âIt looks good on you,â you murmur.
She raises a brow. âThe medal or the sweat and grass stains?â
âBoth,â you admit, cheeks warming. âBut mostly the medal.â
Patriâs grin softens. âStay proud of me for at least twentyâfour hours, okay? Iâm going to be milking this.â
You tap the gold circle once, then glance toward the family section where Alexia is still lobbing snarky comments your way. âI should go over before she tries to moonâwalk on that ankle just to get attention.â
Patri nods, but catches your hand before you step away. âOne condition,â she says, tone mockâstern. âYou promise we have a drink together at the afterâparty.â
You arch an eyebrow. âWater counts?â
âNope.â
You roll your eyes with exaggerated exasperation, but your fingers squeeze hers. âFine. One drink. Maybe two if no spiders are involved.â
âDeal.â She lifts your joined hands briefly, sealing it with a gentle squeeze before letting go.
You start toward your little family, feeling her eyes follow you, and for the first time in what feels like forever the buzz in your chest isnât panic itâs something bright, brandânew, and almost dizzyingly hopeful.
Alba watches you approach from where sheâs leaning against the barrier, her arms crossed and her eyebrows practically reaching her hairline. As soon as youâre close enough, she nudges you with her elbow, her grin slowly spreading. âWell?â she asks, eyes wide and unmistakably smug.
You glance back toward Patri, whoâs still being tackled with hugs and cheers from teammates, medal swinging around her neck, then back at your sister. You raise a brow. âWell, what?â
Alba practically bounces on the balls of her feet. âDonât do that. You just hugged her like the final scene in a romance movie. What did she say? Did you say something?â
You scoff and shove her gently with your shoulder. âShut up.â
Alba bursts into laughter, hands raised in mock surrender. âIâm just asking! You have that weird happy face you only get when something good happens.â
You roll your eyes, cheeks warm despite yourself. âYouâre worse than her.â you jerk your thumb to Alexia oblivious talking to Eli.
âYeah, but Iâm the one youâre stuck with for the drive home,â she says, winking. âAnd I want every detail.â You groan.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The music thumps low and warm through the venue, the kind of bass that vibrates gently through your chest without demanding too much attention. Youâre leaned casually against a high-top table, half-laughing as Cata Coll animatedly mimics her reaction to a goal-line clearance, and Claudia Pina is mid-eye roll, clearly not buying the dramatics.
Youâve found yourself oddly comfortable here, chatting with them theyâd made it easy. Youâd spent time with them before, back when things with Patri were simpler, lighter. They hadnât treated you like an outsider then, and they werenât now either, despite everything.
Cataâs halfway through a joke when your eyes lift and you see Patri weaving through the crowd toward you, a drink in each hand. She's changed out of her kit now, dressed down but still radiant with that post-win energy that clings to her like sunlight. Her eyes are already on you, thereâs something unmistakable in the way she looks at you warm, focused, a touch nervous, like youâre the only person in the room that matters.
Cata notices, so does Pina, you see it happen the flash of recognition between them. Pina glances at Cata, one brow raised. Cata, with the subtle awareness that only close friends have, clears her throat softly and shifts her weight. âWell,â Cata says lightly, brushing her fingers against your arm with a grin, âWeâll go harass the DJ or something.â
âYeah,â Pina smirks, already stepping back. âDonât let her spill that drink on you. Sheâs got a history of that.â
Before you can respond, theyâre already slipping into the crowd, leaving you with a quiet exhale and Patri, now standing just in front of you, holding out one of the drinks.
You take it, your fingers brushing hers. She smiles, a little crooked and uncertain around the edges. âYou didnât say what you wanted, so I guessed.â
You raise the glass. âGood guess.â
Thereâs a beat, the space between you hums with something unspoken but thick and alive like static before a storm. âHey,â she says softly.
âHey.â
Patri studies you, her expression tightening with quiet concern as her eyes trace over your features. âYou okay?â she asks, voice low, nearly drowned out by the music. âYou look kind of pale.â
You let out a breath, deflecting with a soft scoff as you tilt your drink. âItâs the lighting,â you murmur, glancing up at the ceiling like itâs personally responsible. âTheyâre trying to set a mood, I guess, dramatic shadows and poor complexions.â
Patri doesnât look convinced, but she lets it go, smiling softly instead. âYou look good, but I already knew that.â
You raise a brow, your lips twitching into a smirk despite yourself. âYou flirting with me now, Guijarro?â
She shrugs, stepping just a little closer. âMaybe. Is it working?â
You pretend to consider, gaze lingering on her lips for just a second too long. âMight be.â
The smile she gives you is real, warmer now, more confident. The noise of the party fades to a dull throb around you both, like the rest of the world has respectfully stepped back.
You donât realise how close youâve gotten until your forehead is pressing gently against hers, your eyes slipping shut as your breath slows. The contact is soft, familiar, intimate. âI miss you,â you whisper, the words tumbling out without warning, fragile and honest. âI miss you so much.â
Patriâs breath hitches and then before you can say anything else, before your doubts can crawl back in she leans in and kisses you.
Itâs not rushed or desperate. Itâs steady, sure, her hand finding the side of your face like sheâs afraid you might drift away again. The kiss deepens just slightly enough to taste the longing behind it, the weeks of silence, the ache of missing something that once felt like home.
When she pulls away, barely, her forehead rests against yours again. You swallow, nerves catching in your throat as you glance at her lips, then you hear Alba's voice, the first chance you get, just fuck her. You shift, your voice low and hesitant.
âDo you, uhâŠâ You clear your throat, flicking your eyes up to meet hers. âDo you have a room of your own orâŠ?â
Patri blinks, startled, her breath catches audibly not in a way thatâs uncomfortable, but like someone hearing something theyâve been hoping for but didnât expect to come. âIââ she starts, her voice a little higher than usual. She stops, bites her lip, recalibrates. âYeah. I do.â
She watches you carefully now, her confidence from earlier dimmed by the sudden gravity of what youâre asking. Thereâs a flicker of nervousness in her eyes, but itâs softened by warmth, by care. She steps closer, almost hesitantly, like she doesnât want to spook you.
âAre you sure?â she asks, quietly. âYou donât have to, just because of tonight, or the moment. I want you to want it⊠not feel like you have to give anything to restart us.â
You nod slowly, gaze steady on hers despite the pounding of your heart. âI know. I wouldnât have asked if I didnât want to. Iâm⊠nervous, yeah, but it's you, you're all I want.â
Patri exhales slowly, visibly moved. She brushes a hand along your arm, fingers barely grazing your skin. âOkay,â she says, her voice almost a whisper. âThen letâs go, but only if you hold my hand the whole way, I'm nervous to.â
You offer a small, nervous laugh, and she smiles wide, taking your hand in hers like itâs the most natural thing in the world. Neither of you says anything more as you walk out hearts racing, hands locked, the moment finally, tenderly, unfolding.
The hallway to the lift feels longer than it probably is. You and Patri walk side by side, hands clasped tight but swinging gently between you, as if neither of you wants to draw attention but neither of you can let go. Your footsteps echo softly against the sleek floors of the hotel corridor.
Neither of you speaks, itâs not awkward just weighted. Like the space between words when something big is about to happen.
When you reach the elevator, Patri presses the button with her free hand. The chrome doors reflect a version of you both that somehow looks braver than you feel.
The silence in the lift is thick you feel the warmth of her hand pulsing in yours and dare a glance her way. Sheâs looking straight ahead, but thereâs a tiny smile on her lips like she knows what you're thinking, like sheâs thinking it too.
The numbers above the doors light up one by one too slow, then too fast.
She leads you gently down another corridor, her roomâs near the end, a quiet corner. Her hand finally slips from yours just so she can get her key card out. The little green light flashes, and the lock clicks open.
She glances at you, just once, checking in, you nod itâs subtle, but itâs everything. Patri pushes the door open and you both step inside.
The room is warm, soft lighting. A faint trace of perfume in the air hers. Itâs not overly fancy, but itâs quiet, calm. She places her key card on the dresser and turns back to you.
Patri doesnât move quickly. She just looks at you for a long moment, her eyes flickering between yours, like sheâs trying to memorise the shape of your face, the emotion behind your eyes. Then she steps closer, close enough for her hands to find your waist gently.
She hugs you first, slow, firm, grounding, her arms around you arenât possessive, theyâre comforting. Her cheek rests against your temple for a second, and you feel her exhale softly. She smells like her shampoo, something faintly citrus and clean, and you close your eyes without meaning to.
Her hands start to move, not rushed, just exploring the curve of your back, the dip of your waist. She traces careful lines like sheâs learning you with her fingertips. She pulls back a little not away, just enough to see your face.
âYouâre sure?â she murmurs, eyes asking more than her words ever could.
You nod once, her lips brush yours feather-light, a question.
When you donât pull away, she kisses you again, a little deeper now, but still gentle, still measured. Her hands pause every few moments, as if to say 'This is your moment. You can stop it anytime.' She gives you all the space in the world to step back, but you donât.
You move with her, into her and in every quiet pause she leaves, you choose to stay.
Your hands find her shoulders and you guide her gently, steadily, until she sits at the edge of the bed. Patri looks up at you with a mix of awe and curiosity, her breath catching slightly. You donât give her much time you step between her knees, hands sliding along her jaw as you lean down and kiss her slow, purposeful, with more pressure now, more intent.
Her hands rest at your waist, hesitant at first, then holding you tighter as the kiss deepens. You move your hips, just slightly, not rushed a slow, instinctive motion that draws a soft sound from her throat.
The heat builds in the spaces between kisses, in the way her fingers spread across your back as you move to straddle her. In the way your body presses closer, seeking more of her, more of this.
You pause for a second, foreheads resting together, both breathing a little harder now. Her thumbs brush under your shirt, tracing the bare skin at your sides, a silent ask for permission, and you don't stop her.
You kiss her again this time, with no hesitation.
Patriâs arm wraps around your waist with purpose, steady and sure, and in one smooth motion, she stands, effortlessly lifting and turning you. You barely have time to react before youâre laid back on the bed, your head hitting the soft pillow as she settles gently between your legs, her body fitting perfectly against yours.
She pauses, her weight balanced carefully so as not to press too hard, her eyes searching yours in the quiet dimness. Her hand brushes your cheek, her voice soft but steady as she asks, âLights on or off?â
Thereâs a flicker of hesitation in your chest not because you donât want her, but because itâs vulnerable still, you manage a quiet, âOff.â
She nods instantly, no questions asked, no judgment in her gaze just understanding. She reaches over and turns off the lamp. The room is bathed in darkness, except for the faint light spilling in through the hotel door from the corridor.
Then she leans back down, her lips brushing yours again, softer now, slower patient. Like she knows this moment matters. Like sheâs ready to show you, without a word, just how much she cares.
In the hush of the darkened room, your breaths start to sync, slow and uneven, charged with anticipation. Patri doesnât rush, her hands move with respect, fingertips ghosting over the hem of your shirt before she gently pulls it up, pausing only when itâs lifted over your head. Her eyes adjust to the low light, and even in shadow, you feel her taking in every inch of you like youâre something sacred.
You reach for her next, fingers fumbling slightly as you tug at the edge of her top. She smiles faintly at the nerves in your touch and lifts her arms to help you, letting the fabric slip away. She looks so calm, but you catch the subtle shift in her breathing the flutter in her throat that matches your own heartbeat.
Her hands are back on you, slower now, trailing over your sides, memorising the lines of your body with soft, steady pressure. Her thumbs brush just under your ribs, pausing for the slightest moment when they pass over the faint ridges of a scar the first she found of many, but she doesnât stop. If anything, her hands linger, almost like sheâs grounding herself to you. Proving she's not repulsed by your history etched on your skin with your scars.
When she unclasps your bra, itâs with a softness that tells you sheâs waited for this not just the intimacy, but the trust. You shiver as it falls away and she presses a kiss to your shoulder, then to the center of your chest, right where your heart beats, like she knows how hard itâs worked to bring you here.
You help her with the rest of her clothes, your hands firmer now, more certain, guided by want and the need to feel her fully overtaking your nerves to a distant memory. Every layer removed between you is like shedding hesitation until there's nothing left but warmth, skin, and closeness.
She leans in, her forehead resting against yours again, your bare bodies brushing in quiet tension. âStill okay?â she whispers.
You nod, breath catching. âYeah,â you manage, voice thin but sure. âI want you.â And with that, the space between you disappears Patriâs hand moves with care, exploring your body. Thereâs no rush only a quiet, deep patience in the way she touches you, like sheâs listening to every breath you take, every shift in your bodyâs rhythm.
Her fingers trail slowly down your torso following your biggest scar like a road map down to your centre, a soft path of heat following her motion. When she reaches the curve of your hip, your breath hitches, a tremble running through you that you canât hide. She pauses, her eyes lifting to meet yours in the dim light.
âStill okay?â she asks, voice barely above a whisper.
You nod, lips parting on a shaky breath. âYeah. Donât stop.â
When her hand finds the most sensitive part of you and runs through your folds, the feeling is overwhelming not just the sensation, but the intimacy of it, the way she touches you with both confidence and care. Itâs like every nerve in your body lights up at once. You curl closer, your hand gripping her wrist lightly, not to stop her, but to feel anchored.
You kiss her in another silent 'I'm ok', Patri watches not just your body, but your face, the way your lashes flutter and your jaw tightens as you react to her. Her expression is full of focus, awe, and something deeper, affection, even love.
She kisses your neck gently, letting her lips trail up to your ear. âYouâre beautiful like this,â she murmurs. âLet me take care of you.â
Patriâs touch is slow, reverent more about connection than urgency. She watches your face, learning every reaction like itâs a language only she wants to speak fluently. Her fingers move with gentle precision, exploring with a tenderness that sends waves of sensation through you.
You tense slightly at first not from discomfort, but from the vulnerability of it, but sheâs patient, her other hand stroking your side in calming circles, her mouth close enough to whisper affirmations only meant for you.
âYouâre incredible,â she murmurs. âI'm so hot for you right nowâ
When her fingers ease inside, your breath catches, and her gaze never leaves you. She moves with intention, every movement measured, listening to the subtle cues of your body. Thereâs nothing hurried, nothing careless only the deep, growing rhythm.
You cling to her, your body finding its own rhythm against her hand. The way she touches you firm, slow, knowing makes you feel understood in a way words could never capture. You can feel the pressure building, pleasure winding tighter inside you with every stroke and the whole time, sheâs there present, grounded, entirely focused on you. You cup her face forcing her lips to yours, you kiss her with the passion you could never voice, your tongues brushing, you pull your lips back as your forced to gasp her name with the sensation she was creating deep in your stomach,
You breathe in through your mouth "Patri" you say on the exhale and Patriâs hand moves with more purpose, fingers pressing deeper, tracing firmer paths that ignite sparks along your skin. Her grip tightens just enough to make you shiver, sending heat pulsing through every nerve ending.
Sheâs no longer gentle as she learns you can take it, but still deliberate, her touch demanding and fierce, matching the fire building inside you. You arch off the bed slightly, each movement sending a new wave of pleasure crashing through you. As your breathing grows heavier, she shifts, lowering herself until her lips graze across your chest.
Her mouth closes around your nipple gently at first, her tongue teasing, her lips warm. Then she deepens it, the suction on your nipple sending a jolt straight through your core as her fingers don't let up. The combination of her touch and the heat of her mouth pulls a your first moan from your lips.
You're wrapped up in her the way she moves, the way she focuses on every part of you like you're something to be treasured and devoured at the same time. It's overwhelming in the best way, and you feel your body start to tremble as everything she gives builds toward the edge.
Her other hand grips your waist firmly, holding you steady as her fingers explore with raw, urgent rhythm. The tension coils tighter, pleasure and desire crashing through you like waves, relentless and fierce.
She leans in, her breath hot against your ear, voice low and rough. âYou like this, donât you?â
You canât hold back the answer, your body craving every stronger, rougher stroke she offers, your trust in her fuelling the wildness between you. "Harder, please" you beg, "Harder, faster, 'm gonna cum"
Her fingers move with a steady, commanding rhythm, each stroke driving deeper into you, making your pulse race and your breath hitch. Patriâs eyes lock onto yours, dark and intense, as she watches every reaction, every shiver she pulls from your body.
Her touch is fierce but careful, a balance of strength and tenderness that sends you spiraling higher. The heat between you is electric, raw desire mixing with a deep trust that wraps around you both.
You reach out, tangling your fingers in her hair, pulling her closer, craving every moment, every sensation. Patri responds with a kiss, her movements gaining urgency, never letting you forget just how much she wants you how much she needs you to feel this too.
The world narrows to just the two of you, the quiet hum of the room fading away beneath the storm of sensation youâre both creating, into the late hours of the evening.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The early morning light spills gently through the thin curtains, casting a soft glow over the room. Itâs quiet, still except for the sound of Patriâs soft, steady breathing beside you, but your body feels wrong.
You blink slowly, your head heavy, skin hot and clammy. Sweat clings to your chest, dampening the sheets. Something tightens in your gut as a wave of panic rolls through you.
Carefully, you peel the covers back, not wanting to wake her. You spot one of Patriâs t-shirts tossed over a nearby chair and pull it over your head, the familiar scent of her comforting for just a second. Your legs feel unsteady, but you manage to stand, one hand gripping the edge of the bed for balance.
You take a step then another but the world tilts sideways, you stumble, bumping hard into the wall with a dull thud.
The noise jolts Patri awake. âY/N?â she calls out, voice hoarse with sleep but laced with worry. She sits up quickly, blinking in confusion as she sees you slumped against the wall, pale and drenched in sweat, your chest rising in quick, shallow breaths.
Sheâs out of bed and in an instant beside you, her hands on your arms. âHey, hey whatâs wrong? Are you okay?â
You shake your head weakly, throat tight. âI donât⊠I don't feel ok. Patri I'm scared.â
Patri's eyes scan you, alarm settling on her face. Your body sags against her, drained, Patriâs grip on you tightens just as your knees buckle and then you go completely limp in her arms.
âNo, no, no Y/N!â she cries out, trying to hold you up, but your body slips from her grasp and crumples to the floor.
The sound of your body hitting the ground sends Patri into full panic.
âÂĄAyuda! ÂĄPor favor! Help! Someone!â she yells, her voice cracking as she drops to her knees beside you, cradling your face. âWake up please wake up,â she whispers, checking your breathing with shaking fingers.
Your skin is hot to the touch, your breaths shallow, moments later, the door bursts open Cata and Pina are the first to arrive, both in sweats and half-awake but alert the second they see your body on the floor and the fear on Patriâs face.
âWhat happened?â Cata rushes forward, already pulling out her phone. âIâm calling emergency services.â
âShe just collapsed,â Patri breathes, barely holding it together. âShe was hot clammy and then just⊠she fainted. I don't think she's breathing!"
âI'm calling for help,â Cata says firmly, stepping back into the hallway to make the call.
Pina looks between Patri and your unconscious form, then bolts. âIâll get Alexia.â
She sprints down the corridor, "Pina?" Mapi asks coming out her hotel room door, "What's going on?"
"Get the doctor, Patris girl has stopped breathing!" Pina gets in front of Alexia's door and bangs on it, not waiting before pushing it open. Alba is inside, sitting up already, hair a mess, clearly startled. Alexiaâs rubbing sleep from her eyes, confused by the sudden intrusion.
Pinaâs tone is urgent, short of breath. âYou need to come. Now. Itâs Y/N.â
The look on Alexiaâs face changes instantly sleep disappears. âWhat happened?â
âShe collapsed, she's not breathing.â
Alba is already throwing on a hoodie. Alexia doesnât even pause to grab her shoes. âWhere is she?â
âPatriâs room,â Pina says, already leading them out. Alba and Alexia follow without a word, hearts hammering, fear overtaking everything.
Patri barely hears the footsteps pounding down the hall she doesnât lift her head from where sheâs knelt beside you, one hand gripping yours tightly, the other stroking damp strands of hair off your burning forehead.
Then Alexia drops to the floor beside her. âCome on you, wake up for me, Y/N,â Alexia murmurs, her voice cracking, her hand gently touching your cheek. âHey COME ON, please.â Thereâs real fear in her eyes now, seeing you like this, so still, takes the air from her lungs.
Alba stands just behind them, wide-eyed, her arms crossed over her chest like sheâs physically trying to hold herself together. She sees the way Patriâs face is streaked with panic and guilt, and the tension sheâs been carrying all trip suddenly breaks, sharp and loud.
âWhat did you do?â Alba snaps, stepping closer. âWhat did you do to her? I trusted you with her!â
Patriâs head lifts sharply, her eyes glassy. âI didnât, Alba, I didnât do anything! I swearââ
âShe was fine when I left her yesterday,â Alba shoots back, voice rising. âShe was fine! And now Iâm being woken up because sheâs on the floor not breathing?â
âI didnât know she wasnât feeling well,â Patri pleads, barely keeping it together. âShe didnât say anything, not really. She just got up and then-â
âDonât yell,â Alexia says firmly, turning to Alba without looking away from you. Her voice is strained but steady. âNot now. Not while sheâs like this.â
Albaâs mouth opens again but then closes when she sees Alexiaâs face, her jaw clenched, her hand still resting on your cheek, fingers trembling.
The room falls silent, only the distant voice of Cata on the phone in the hall filling the space.
Alexia leans closer. âCome on, hermanita,â she whispers to you, voice cracking. âDonât scare us like this. Wake up. Mami just got you back you can't go now, not like this"
The hallway erupts in noise as the Barcelona medical team rushes in, led by the team doctor. The moment they see you on the floor pale, motionless they drop their bags and spring into action.
âMove back.. now!â one of them orders, already kneeling beside your body. Alexia and Patri are both frozen until someone physically pulls them back. Alba stumbles a few steps away, hand clamped over her mouth.
âSheâs not breathing,â one doctor says quickly, pressing two fingers against your neck. âNo pulse.â
âStarting compressions!â
The room explodes into urgency. "Has someone called an ambulance?"
Pina answered the only semi composed in the room, "Cata is onto them"
Patri gasps audibly, a sharp sound of shock as tears fill her eyes. Her hands tremble uncontrollably at her sides. Alexia grips the edge of the table beside her so tightly her knuckles turn white, her chest heaving with the weight of watching.
One medic is performing chest compressions, counting under his breath, while the other breathes for you.
Alba canât look away, her knees buckle, and she grips the doorframe for balance. âPlease,â she whispers. âPlease noâŠâ
They pause only briefly, two fingers coming to your neck âStill no pulse. Resume compressions!â
Patri turns away, burying her face in her hands. âNo, no, noâŠâ she whispers like a prayer.
Alexia watches, her eyes rimmed red, face pale, and her voice finally breaks through the rising panic in the room. âY/N, pleaseâŠâ she chokes. âDonât do this. Donât go.â
Your PR team thought that joining Love Island could be an easy way to grow your popularity as a singer but in reality, nothing about it turned out to be easy: the constant drama, the fighting, and of course, living in the villa with Alexia Putellas, who wasnât going to quit until she had you. ⥠inspired by @lovelettersfromluna's love island fic
tags/contains: islander!Alexia, drama & some comedy, reality TV, love triangle, bombshell!Patri, all-sapphic love island, around 13k+ words
a/n: everything in orange is the Love Island narrator (reference if u're not familiar) and everything indented is commentary or cut scenes
masterlist ⥠the alexia playlist series
âËâĄâĄ It's Love Island: Girl's Getaway â the first ever Love Island where it's all 100% girls and no dudes. Here, the girls are hot and the drama? Even hotter. This season, absolutely no one is gonna play it straight.Â
Get it? Cause theyâre gay.
âËâĄâĄ You're an up-and-coming singer. While you found success as a songwriter for several big popstars, writing hit love songs for the likes of Ariana Grande and Dua Lipa, you're yet to make it as a singer.
Why? Cause you've never really been in love. How could you sing about love if you've never experienced it? It was much easier to write a song for someone else: slipping into someone elseâs story, their heartbreak, their fairytale. But when it comes to putting your own feelings into a melody... it never felt quite right.
So, your PR team decides that the perfect way for you to get that experience â just enough exposure to get you more comfortable singing about love â and well, also to get more followers was to join Love Island. (Your introduction song was Silk Chiffon â Muna, a song that you actually co-wrote.)
âËâĄâĄ Your introduction video was cute, kinda wholesome compared to everyone else's introductions. And while everyone else came into the villa with hot, intense energies, you brought something softer. Your energy was disarmingly gentle and genuine.
And that somehow worked in your favor. All the girls seemed drawn to your authentic energy. On the other hand, you felt intimidated. Everyone was hot, tall, and model-like. You wondered how you could possibly get coupled up if everyone else looked straight out of a Victoria's Secret catalogue.Â
âËâĄâĄ Ahh, our first set of girls are standing tall and looking confident... or secretly regretting their shoe choices. I can't tell.Â
They know the drill for the first coupling: if the new girl is your type, step forward.That new girl can now choose among all the girls who stepped forward or if they wanna be naughty, they can steal someone else's couple.
âËâĄâĄ You partnered up with the first girl â another musician from England. Her name was Cassie; she had beautiful, soft features that contrasted her tattooed body. She was hot, definitely. Maybe even someone you'd go for outside the villa. But still, something held you back. You werenât completely sold.
Even so, you stepped forward almost right away.
You couldnât really explain it. Maybe it was the rush of adrenaline. Maybe it was the fear of being left behind and stuck with someone who wasnât your type at all. It probably came from both. Either way, your reaction was quick, and that anxious quickness was mistaken for certainty.
Cassie beamed as she walked over to stand beside you. She whispered that sheâd felt something the moment she saw you. That she was glad youâd chosen her.
You smiled, but something about it didnât sit right. You felt stupid, like you'd accidentally promised something you couldnât follow through on. You didnât mean to lead her on. You were just trying to survive the moment.
âËâĄâĄ That's a pair that looks like they'll make beautiful love songs together... or if things go south, weâre looking at enough breakup songs to rival Taylor Swiftâs career. A win for me and my sing-along shower playlist either way!
âËâĄâĄ You didnât fully regret partnering with Cassie as the other girls walked in. Sure, you were a bit hasty with your decision but she definitely was the best choice for you. She had this gentle, genuine energy about her, and she was undeniably attractive with her indie rockstar vibe. She definitely seemed more your type compared to the others.
You were almost sure that you made the right choice⊠until Alexia walked in.Â
(Alexiaâs entrance song was Beso â Rosalia.)
âËâĄâĄ We try not to rank our Islanders but we certainly did this time cause we saved the best for last!Â
It's boots off, bikini on for this beautiful babe with the double Ballon d'Ors. Whew, that's too many Bs! And what comes before B? A â as in A-lexia! Let's see if our Catalan Captain can score girls as easily as she can score goals.
âËâĄâĄ It wasnât arrogant or boastful, but there was something about her that made it clear she was sure of herself. Perhaps it was the way she walked and carried herself. It just exuded confidence.Â
A small smile played at the corners of her lips as she took in the room, her eyes scanning each girl... until they landed on you.
Her gaze felt intense, almost intimidating. It felt like they were studying you. You bit your lip, unable to look away, as her smirk grew, her eyes still locked on yours.
âËâĄâĄ You didn't step forward for Alexia.Â
Maybe it was because Cassie was standing beside you, her presence grounding you, making you hesitate. Or maybe it was the thought of competing with everyone else who had already stepped forward for Alexia. Either way, something held you back.
You found Alexia insanely attractive and interesting but something was stopping you from stepping forward.Â
Alexia raised an eyebrow at you, but said nothing. Instead, she shifted her focus, pairing up with Savannah, the Instagram influencer who was the only one left uncoupled.Â
âËâĄâĄ Alexia and Savannah â that seems like the perfect power couple to me. She won the World Cup, the Ballon d'Or and every other trophy a footballer could dream of winning. And Savannah... well, she endorses tummy detox tea on Instagram!Â
âËâĄâĄ After the initial coupling, it was clear that Cassie was already falling hard for you. She couldnât stop talking about how drawn she was to you, how you were exactly the kind of person she had hoped to meet here. You tried to show the same enthusiasm, to return her feelings, but something held you back. You couldnât go all-in, not when you could feel Alexiaâs eyes on you and Cassie all the time.Â
Even when Savannah was practically throwing herself at Alexia, lying across her lap, playing with her hair in the most flirtatious way, Alexiaâs gaze still seemed to find its way back to you. It was unsettling and intimidating, and no matter how much you tried to focus on Cassie, it was becoming increasingly difficult to ignore.
As much as you wanted to confront Alexia, to figure out why she seemed so fixated on you and Cassie, you were too shy and non-confrontational. Besides, you didnât have enough to go on, no reason to bring it up. It felt like you were reading too much into something that could have been nothing at all.
âËâĄâĄ You also hit it off instantly with Jade, a part-time dog sitter and part-time voice actor. She was effortlessly cool and laid-back, and she reminded you a lot of your best friend outside of the villa. When Cassie was urged by the producers to chat with the others, Jade found her way over to your sofa lounge.
"So, you guys already seem like the couple to last," she said casually, adjusting the strap of her red bikini as she stretched out beside you. "I'm jealous cause I donât think April and I have that connection yet.â
You nodded sheepishly, feeling a bit awkward, especially knowing just how unsure you were of your feelings for Cassie. "Yeah⊠but itâs really only been a day.â
Jade immediately noticed something off, hearing the tension in your voice. "Hey, you good?"
You bit your lip and looked around before leaning closer to the brunette. "What do you think that girl Alexia's deal is?" You asked quietly.
"Alexia? The football player?" Jade looked confused. "Why?"
"I don't know.â You shrugged, trying to act casual even if it has been all youâve been thinking about for the past hour. "She seemed to be looking at me and Cassie a lot and it just... it just felt odd, y'know?"
Jade scanned the room quickly, her eyes narrowing as she looked for Alexia. When she didnât spot her, she shrugged, seeming to consider your words. "Maybe sheâs jealous? Her and Savannah? They donât make sense together, while you and Cassie... well, you two are already tough contenders."
You hummed, unsure of what to make of Jadeâs observation. "You really think so?"
"Could be," Jade replied, giving a little shrug. "I mean, sheâs pretty intense, and you two... well, you're kinda vibing. It's hard not to notice. A lot of people are not here for love but for the game, and well, she might be one of those people. Do you have any other reason to think so? You think sheâs into you or Cassie?â
Jade looked more intrigued, a certain sparkle in her eyes. You paused. You were pretty certain that Alexiaâs eyes always found yours but then again, you might have been reading too much into it. She might have actually been into Cassie. âI donât think Iâd be her type,â you responded. âYou think Cassie is?â
Jade shook her head. âNah, I just seriously think sheâs jealous of your bond.â She said, settling beside you. âJust focus on Cassie right now. Alexiaâll have to deal with Savannah until she finds someone more interesting.â
âËâĄâĄ It had only been less than a day but Cassie was incredibly romantic already: picking flowers from the garden to put in your hair, massaging sunscreen on your back, even putting food on your plate for dinner. You two practically just mer each other a day ago but the way she acted was akin to someone who's been in a relationship for months.
You knew that things move fast in Love Island; you watched several seasons across most the franchises in preparation... but even that couldn't prepare you for Cassie. She seemed like those U-Haul Lesbian stereotypes you always heard about.Â
But you figured that if Cassie was this into it, she must be seeing a potential with your coupling. So, you tried to play along, holding her hand and even cuddling up to her whenever you had the chance but you couldn't completely focus on her.
Not when Alexia was constantly staring at you two.
âËâĄâĄ You couldn't sleep well your first night in. Mostly because Cassie was smothering you. You never were a fan of cuddling and Cassie was an absolute koala bear in bed, clinging on to you like you were the last eucalyptus tree.Â
By the time the first rays of light peeked through the villa, you were wide awake, feeling the sleepiness still hanging over you. You blinked your eyes a few times, trying to shake it off, and gently slipped out from under the covers so you wouldnât wake Cassie.
You threw on a patterned bikini, smoothed on a bit of makeup to freshen up, and slipped out for a quiet early morning swim
âËâĄâĄ You werenât expecting anyone to be up yet. The lights usually came on at 9 am so everyone was still fast asleep, tucked in sheets or cuddled up with their partner.Â
The villa was quiet, the air still cool, the sky just beginning to turn from gray to gold. It felt serene; the perfect time to get an early morning swim session in without having to socialize with anyone else. If you could completely forget about the camera and crew lingering around, it would be an introvertâs dream.
But there she was. Alexia Putellas.
Alone outside, mid-squat with dumbbells on both of her hands, her body steady and focused. She was wearing a black sports bra and matching shorts, her hair scraped back into a ponytail, the light catching on the fine sheen of sweat across her chest and shoulders.Â
You subconsciously slowed down your walking. Alexia immediately noticed you. A lazy smile sprawled on her face as she caught sight of you, her eyes scanning your body.Â
âGood morning, guapa." She greeted. "Didn't sleep well?"
You shook your head. "Just an early riser," you lied, not wanting to show signs of incompatibility with Cassie. "You?"
âAthleteâs schedule⊠kinda just used to waking up this early.â She reached for her water bottle, took a sip, then glanced toward you again. âWanna join me?â
You gave a soft laugh and shook your head. âIâm more of a pilates and morning swim girl. I donât really do weights.â
âPity,â she said, pausing. âStrong legs can help when youâre running from things.â
You blinked, trying to process what she was implying. You narrowed your eyes. âWhat are you trying to say?"
Alexia chuckled under her breath and picked up the weights again. âNothing, just fitness advice.â
You turned, ignoring her odd comment, about to keep walking toward the pool, when her voice stopped you. âSo,â she said, adjusting her grip on her weights. "Why didnât you step forward?â
You froze for half a second before slowly facing her again. âSorry?â
She looked at you fully now, the expression on her face unreadable. Calm, composed, maybe a little amused. âYesterday. Everyone stepped forward for me. Except you.â
âExcept me and Cassie,â You corrected as you furrowed your eyebrows together. You scanned her expression, trying to figure out why she was suddenly bringing this up as your first one-on-one conversation. "Why? Did I hurt your ego?"
Alexia chuckled at your banter. "Ooh, never thought you were the feisty type." She commented. "But seriously, I don't really care for all that. I just... was curious about you."
You licked your lips, suddenly aware of how dry they were. âI guess⊠I didnât want the attention. Everyone already wanted you. I was already in a couple. It just didnât feel worth the chaos.â
She tilted her head. âSoâŠit was about everyone else.â
Your brows furrowed. âWhat?â
âYou didnât step forward because of them. Not because of me.â A smile played on her lips, subtle but undeniably present.Â
You blinked at her, thrown away by her statement. âWell, yeah. What does it matter?â
Alexia paused, then lowered the weights again, slower this time. âIt doesnât. I was just curious.â
Then her eyes locked with yours. Still quiet. Still unreadable.
âSo, even if you didnât step forward, you still want me. Is that right?â She asked. You felt your breath catch. The way she said it wasnât arrogant. She sounded⊠genuinely curious. Like she wanted the truth to your attraction. It felt mildly invasive, just enough to make you flush.
Something in your stomach stirred. You looked at the ground before returning your gaze back into Alexia's hazel eyes. God, why is she so intense?Â
Before Alexia could prod you to answer, a chirpy voice chimed in.Â
"Good morning, darling!" It was Savannah, clad in a tiny white bikini with her bleached blonde hair in a messy bun. She headed immediately to Alexia, ignoring you completely. She wrapped her arms around the Catalan from behind and pressed a kiss to her cheek. âMissed you in bed.â
Alexia didnât move away. But she didnât lean in either. Her eyes remained locked with yours as if she was still expecting an answer even with Savannah there. You didnât say anything; you just walked toward the pool, the heat rising to your chest, your stomach turning from the interaction.
You felt Alexiaâs eyes on you the entire time.
âËâĄâĄ Well, that question seemed heavier than the Barcelona captain's weights. Could Alexia be looking to strike a chord â or a nerve â with our musician?
And as for Savannah. I could say that that was definitely an offside, and by offside, I mean that Alexia wants Savannah off her side.
âËâĄâĄ You spent the rest of the day trying to focus on Cassie.Â
Something about your interaction with Alexia just made you want to avoid her at all cost and just focus on Cassie. You tried to reciprocate her sweet gestures: cuddling by the pool, sitting on her lap, spoon feeding her breakfast.
It was enough to convince everyone that you were already a solid couple. Maybe even enough to convince yourself.
âËâĄâĄ After lunch with everyone, you decided to settle by the pool, sunbathing and trying to get some time alone from the rest of the Islanders.
Jade slithered to you. âYou wonât believe what I just heard,â she said, a playful and excited lilt to her tone.
You lifted your sunglasses slightly, giving her a curious look. âYeah?â
Jadeâs grin grew wider as she perched on the edge of your sun lounger, glowing from the joy of gossiping. âAlexiaâs been talking smack about you and Cassie.â She said in a lower tone.
Your stomach did a strange flip at the mention of Alexiaâs name. âWhat about us?â you asked, trying to keep your voice casual.
âSo, we were sitting around the kitchen, right? Me, River, and April. Just talking about which couples we thought would last. And when we all agreed it was you and Cassie,â she recounted, nodding along as she narrated. âAlexia⊠well, letâs just say maybe you were right about her yesterday. She does have an issue..â
âWait, what did she say?â You sat up now, pushing your sunglasses from your face to the top of your head.
âShe kinda implied that you and Cassie were just faking it for the cameras,â Jade said with a low voice. "Not her exact words but she said something about preferring couples who aren't all for show, like, actually in love and not for the cameras.â
You froze, unsure of what to think or say. You tried to not seem fake, genuinely trying with Cassie but it felt like she saw right through you. âDid she say why she thought that?â
Jade shrugged. âNo but she just said she didnât think you two were as strong as you seemed.â
You paused, looking at the pool and trying to think it through. Jade looked at you and furrowed her eyebrows. âYou seem bothered.â
âWell, yeahâŠâ you paused, considering maybe what you said to her had something to do with it. But then again, you didn't really give anything away. âI mean, I donât know. Itâs just that AlexiaâŠâ
You paused your statement as you see Cassie walking towards you, with two smoothies in hand. She flashed you a grin, but when she saw your expression, it faltered. âHey babe, whatâs going on?â She asked as she sat by your feet, handing you your drink.
You sighed, taking a long sip of your smoothie. Jade decided to fill in Cassie for you. âAlexia thinks you're faking it for the cameras,â she explained. âWe all thought you two were the couple to look out for but she really wasnât convinced.â
Cassieâs face instantly tightened, her lips pressing together in irritation. âSeriously? She said that?â
âRight in front of everyone,â Jade said, too pleased with herself. âLike it was no big deal too, as if it was an established fact.â
Cassie let out a small laugh, but it wasnât a funny one. She seemed annoyed. âI donât get it. Why does she care so much about us?â She scoffed. âIâm not worried about her opinion. If anything, she should worry about her own relationship.â
Jade chimed in again, her voice dripping with amusement. âYeah, and itâs not like sheâs paying attention to Savannah anyway. Poor girlâs practically throwing herself at Alexia and getting nothing in return.â She shook her head. âI just donât know what game sheâs playing cause sheâs not responding to Savannahâs advances but she also isnât making an attempt to connect with anyone else at all."
"Yeah, she hasn't pulled anyone else for a chat." Cassie rolled her eyes. âI think sheâs just here to stir the pot."Â
You stayed silent, sipping your drink.
âËâĄâĄ Well, well, well, looks like troubleâs already brewing in paradise, and we havenât even introduced the snake and the apple yet. And by apple, I don't mean the fruit. I mean, Apple â our new bombshell.
âËâĄâĄ Last time on Love Island, the islanders paired up, and the couple on top of the Villaâs Billboard Charts? Singer-songwriter Y/N and band guitarist Cassie. But not everyoneâs a fan.
âThey just seem so always on,â Alexia said in the recap clip. She shrugged. âI just donât buy it. It seems too posed. I donât think theyâre really into each other.â
And things are about to get even hotter in paradise with our new forbidden fruit, Apple. Will everything stay sweet and peachy or will she leave everyone feeling a little rotten?
âHi! Iâm Apple,â The girl with the atrociously orange fake tan and long lashes said in her introduction video. âIâm a hairdresser so you know Iâm great at scissoring.â
âMy type? Iâve always had a thing for tall girls with tattoos, so if youâve got ink and a little bit of height, I'm sold. In other words, I want Cassie.â
âIâm not here to make girl friends; Iâm here to steal girlfriends.â
âËâĄâĄ The bombshell, Apple, invited Cassie on a date. As soon as Cassie left, the whole villa practically rushed to your side, offering reassurances, comforting you with words like, "Cassie would never go for someone else," and "She only has eyes for you."
Despite their well-meaning attempts, you couldn't shake the uneasy feeling that stirred in your stomach. You werenât all in with Cassie yet but a part of you felt a bit upset by it. If Cassie ended up liking Apple, youâd end up out of a couple and that could mean being the first to go home.
"I'm fine, guys. Really. I just need some alone time to clear my head," you reassured them, before heading out to one of the more private day beds.
As soon as everyone was off your back, gathered in the kitchen to gossip about the new bombshell, Alexia followed you. You could see her make her way to you â dressed in a tiny bikini that showed off her muscles. She looked absolutely stunning but you were too distracted by the new bombshell dilemma to take it all in.
"Are you seriously worried?" Alexia asked, raising a doubtful eyebrow as she sat by the foot of your bed.
âA bit but I donât know,â you sighed, fiddling with your water bottle. âI trust Cassie. And, well, if she likes this new bombshell, then at least itâs early days. But yeah⊠I do feel a bit off.â
Alexia tilted her head slightly, humming as she looked you over. She moved closer to you, sitting by your side now, her strong arm brushing against yours and the side of her leg knocking yours. Suddenly, your mind was divided between Cassie and Alexia whose proximity was making your cheeks flush.
âCassie seems really... popular, huh? She's everyoneâs type. Tall, pretty, good girl with that bad girl vibe.â Alexia said in an indecipherable neutral tone, breaking the silence. âCan't really blame Apple for making a move, right?"
You raised an eyebrow, keeping your tone steady. "Yeah, okay. You donât have to rub it in."Â
Alexia chuckled. âSorry, just pointing it out.â She said before pausing, letting the awkward silence linger for a moment. âI just remembered that yesterday, you said you didnât step forward for me because you didnât like the idea of competition.â
You looked over at Alexia, unsure of her point. She turned towards you, locking eyes. Her hazel eyes looked warm, practically glowing under the light of the sun. You felt your heart thump faster at the intensity of her gaze.
âWhatâs your point?â You said under your breath.
Alexia averted her gaze. âMy point isâŠâ she paused. âHow are you going to handle the competition when it comes to Cassie? Especially with Apple in the picture.â
You stayed silent, turning to remove your gaze from her. Alexia paused, sneaking a look at your expression, trying to read you. âAnd Iâm sure sheâs not the only girl in this villa interested in Cassie.â she added. âJust weird to me how you didnât want competition when it came to me but you donât seem that worried about Cassie.â
âËâĄâĄ You entered the confessional hut, ready to rant.
âGod, I really wasnât bothered that much by Apple since I know Cassie, and I know Cassie is not the type to be easily swayed.â You ran a hand through your hair. âBut Alexia â GOD. Sheâs actually pissing me off. Sheâs always in our business and I never really knew before but now, I know.â
You groaned. âSheâs obviously into Cassie! Thatâs why sheâs been trying to throw me off the whole time, staring at me without any care for who sees. Sheâs just trying to get into my head.â
âËâĄâĄ God, these clueless lesbians frustrate me. She wants YOU, girl! Get a hint!
âËâĄâĄ You were trying to cool off from your interaction with Alexia by joining Jade and April for some yoga when one of the other islanders Heather exclaimed loudly. âI got a text!â
Everyone rushed towards her, excited as to your first challenge.
"Islanders, itâs time for a game of âWho Did It?â The rules are simple: Weâll read out some juicy confessions, and you have to guess which islander did it. When you think you know, kiss the person you think is guilty!" Everyone is buzzing with excitement. âApple and Cassie are already waiting for you in the garden so hurry and get ready to smooch.â
âËâĄâĄ Once you were in the garden, you were grouped into two, partners split up into two separate groups with the bombshell Apple hosting and reading the confessions. Cassie gave you a smile and a wave from where her group was, not able to say anything more but you could tell she was pleased to see you. That seemed like a good sign that she was still in it with me.
But more than seeing Cassie again, you were actually more pleased that Cassie and Alexia were in the same group so they couldnât kiss each other. With your suspicion about Alexia liking Cassie, the last thing you wanted was to see them kissing.
âËâĄâĄ The game began, and your team was up first as the guessers. Everyone seemed to play it safe, kissing their own partners instead of taking a real guess. You werenât one to break the pattern, and honestly, you didnât want to kiss anyone except Cassie.
âThis islander has hooked up with a famous popstar,â Apple announced. The others gasped and murmured. You scanned the room, your gaze landing first on Cassie, who shot you a cheeky shrug and a playful grin. You were about to step toward her when your eyes met Alexiaâs. Her expression was unreadable, like she was watching you closely. It felt like she was waiting for you to make your way to her.
You paused, shaking off the thought. Donât even think about it; sheâs just trying to get to you.
You walked up to Cassie, cupping her face before pressing a soft kiss on her lips. The group egged you on, urging for more, and Cassie pulled you into a deeper kiss, her arms wrapped around you. It felt nice, but you couldnât shake the feeling of Alexiaâs eyes on you the whole time.
"Well, thatâs a winning kiss!" Apple grinned. "In more ways than one: Cassieâs clearly a great kisser, and Y/N got it right. It was Cassie!"
âËâĄâĄ Your group had just scored 2 points, and now it was the other teamâs turn. Cassie was first up.
âThis girl claims that one of her talents is an amazing porn voice.â Apple announced, fanning herself with the prompt cards as she made a shocked expression.
The room instantly erupted with knowing glances, and it was clear to everyone: it was Jade, the only voice actor in the villa.Â
You shot Cassie a playful eye roll, half-smiling, then nodded subtly toward Jade. Go for it, you signaled her with your eyes. Without hesitation, Cassie leaned in, her lips finding Jadeâs in a quick, soft peck. Jade turned to you, mouthing an apology, but you just laughed it off. You werenât bothered by the harmless kiss; after all, it was barely more than a peck, and it was Jade.
Everyone settled down after a few teasing comments about your partner and your best friend kissing which you just rolled your eyes at. Once everyone was back to their spot, it was Alexiaâs turn.
Suddenly, you could feel your body tense up for some reason. Apple cleared her throat, ready to read the next confession. âAwe, did this confession get lost? Itâs so cute.â She teased, pouting. Just by her reaction, you knew it was yours. âOkay, so this islander got ghosted after her first attempt at sexting.â
Everyone cooed and chuckled, poking fun at the most innocent confession said so far. You felt your cheeks flush, unsure if it was because of the other Islandersâ reaction or Alexiaâs unwavering gaze on you. You bit your lip, looking at your feet.
Alexia smirked as she walked towards you. You could feel your breath catch in your throat as she came closer. You looked up at her, meeting those intoxicating hazel eyes. You swear you stopped breathing for a moment. Alexia put a hand on your face, thumb grazing your cheekbone for a moment. It felt like forever â just you two standing closely as she cradled your face and she scanned your eyes.
Your feelings were starting to become confusing and your mind was filled with incoherent thoughts. You never fully considered ever being attracted to Alexia; you knew you found her attractive but maybe you suppressed it so much, trying not to overcomplicate your feelings. Maybe it seemed doable then but with her right in front of you, staring at you with those intense eyes and her hands on you so tenderly â it just felt like you were coming undone.
And before you could even fully process your thoughts, she was kissing you.
You couldnât help but feel your eyes flutter shut as you melted into the warmth of her kiss, your hands holding on to her strong arms for balance as she held your waist with them, holding you flush against you. Alexia kissed you with the perfect balance of gentle intimacy and firm yearning. A satisfied sound escaped your lips as you felt her tongue enter your mouth, warm and firm but not imposing. It would be a lie to say that that was not one of the best kisses you ever had.
You didnât even realize how long you had been kissing until you heard the groupâs whistles and teasing shouts. Blinking your eyes open, you pulled back, your breath coming a little faster than usual. You looked away from Alexia, a bit embarrassed at your eager reciprocation of that kiss. You feel like you just got exposed.
The girls beside you jokingly elbowed you and teased you. Apple chuckled. âNot as innocent as we thought, huh?â
You avoided Alexia and Cassieâs gaze the entire game.Â
âËâĄâĄ Yikes, did an Argentinian goat arrive in the villa? Cause things just got Messi.
âËâĄâĄ While everyone's all smiles after letting their lips loose during the challenge, there's one thing tighter than our Islandersâ bums: the tension between Cassie, Alexia, and Y/N.
âËâĄâĄ In the confession room:
You were slumped on your seat, hands dragging down your face as you groaned. âIâm literally an introvert thrown into the middle of a telenovela. This is like my worst nightmare,â you muttered, peeking between your fingers. âI hate drama. I avoid it like the plague. And somehow? Iâm smack in the middle of it.â
âËâĄâĄ Look at the bright side, Y/N. You could write a song about this drama. Let's call it "Snogging Another Girl In Front of My Partner." Sounds like a banger to me!
You exhaled, eyes drifting toward the floor as you tried to piece it all together, eyes focused away from the camera.
âI like Cassie. A lot. I mean, I picked her on day one, and Iâve intended to put all my eggs in her basket. I really thought we were just... solid. But then thereâs Alexia. And at first, I thought she was just... I donât know, staring because she fancied Cassie? Or maybe she was bitter that things didnât click with Savannah and she was just salty watching Cassie and I actually get along.â You sighed another time.
âBut after that kissâŠâ you trailed off. âI donât know. I really donât know.â
Cassie looked mildly bothered, arms crossed as she sat on the edge of her seat in the confession hut. âI mean, yeah. It bothered me,â she admitted, glancing away for a second. âWe were doing so well. Like, I actually thought we were one of those couples that figured it out early. That we could just chill and ride it out to the end, win the whole thing.â
She huffed out a sigh, then looked straight at the camera. âBut seeing her kiss Alexia? Iâm not stupid. Thereâs clearly something there, something to be worried about. I just donât know how worried I should be cause it might just be a one-time thing like, it might just be a challenge kiss⊠or I might actually be losing my girl.â
The reel cut to you again. You looked genuinely conflicted, fidgeting with the string of your bikini bottom. âI really canât figure out Alexiaâs feelings too. Sheâs so confusing.â
Alexia looked effortlessly composed in her reel, reclined casually with one leg crossed. âI like Y/N.â She said nonchalantly with a shrug and a calm expression, unbothered by the whole drama. âSheâs with Cassie now but that doesnât change things for me. Itâs not really that complicated to me. I like her and that's really all that is to me."
âËâĄâĄ Iâm not a geometrist but I know a love triangle when I see one.Â
âËâĄâĄ âSheâs obviously into you,â Jade said as you two waded in the pool while everyone was working out together âBut like⊠youâre with Cassie.â
You groaned, dragging your fingers through the water. âI know. But I canât help feeling⊠conflicted, I guess.â
Jade tilted her head, brows raised. âBabe, the fact that you're even doubting says a lot. Maybe youâre not as all-in with Cassie as you thought⊠and I saw the way you kissed. That just kinda sealed the deal in my head that you might really be into Alexia.â She held up her hands quickly. âAnd genuinely, no judgment from me. Iâm just saying⊠maybe itâs time to widen your palette. Try the Spanish cuisine.â
You gave her a look as you splashed her with water for the innuendo. âJust this morning you were telling me Cassie and I were endgame. Now youâre basically shoving me into another girlâs arms.â
Jade laughed. âWell, thatâs back when I thought you two were satisfied being the boring couple that wins it all in the end with minimal drama and conflict but now⊠now that there's a ridiculously hot Spanish football player eyeing you like sheâs ready to devour you.â She shrugged. âSo now, I say explore, live a little.â
You shook your head but considered her words for a moment. Jade could tell she was getting to you, shooting you a smile. âItâs Love Island, babe. Donât force yourself to fall for the first girl you couple with.â
âËâĄâĄ After dinner, Cassie took your hand and pulled you aside, leading you away from the fire pit and into one of the quieter corners of the garden. Her grip was tight, her expression guarded, and you could already feel a knot forming in your stomach. You knew a difficult conversation was about to happen and you never liked having to deal with confrontation.
 âI justâŠâ she began, her voice barely above a whisper as she rubbed her thumb over your knuckles. âI feel like weâve been solid since day one. Like we actually found something real here.â She paused, swallowing hard. âAnd then now with AlexiaâŠâ
You paused, not saying anything, focusing your gaze on her thumb drawing patterns on your hands. Cassie let out a shaky sigh. âSheâs not just anyone either. Sheâs this big-time athlete who everyone wants. I just feel threatened cause sheâs like everything Iâm not.â
You couldnât help a quiet chuckle, trying to lighten the mood. âWho everyone wants? You want her too?â you teased gently, wrapping an arm around her and idly playing with the hair on her nape.
Cassie let out a breathy laugh, but her eyes didnât soften. âNo, but seriously, babe.â She reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and looked at you intently. âCan you just⊠tell me the truth?â
A tension hung in the air as Cassie moved closer to you. âRight now, right here. Are you all in with me? Or are you just leading me on?â Cassie sighed. âCause I donât want to be blindsided in the next recoupling. I need to know what you feel now.â
You froze.
It wasnât a hard question. Not really. But the answer stuck in your throat like a stone. You wanted to say yes, to promise her, to kiss her and make her feel safe. But you couldnât force it. During the first few days, you felt bad leading Cassie on, making her think you were sure of her from the first coupling.
This finally felt like your chance to be honest. You bit your lip and tried to muster the strength to say something but you couldnât even manage to keep eye contact, averting your gaze.
âY/N?â Her voice cracked.
You looked up for half a second and she saw it in your face.
Cassie exhaled sharply. âUnbelievable.â She whispered before she shook her head. She dropped your hand like it disgusted her. She stood up and walked away, running off to the other girls to rant.
You didnât follow her. It felt horrible to hurt her like that but you thought it was better than to keep leading her on.
âËâĄâĄ Alexia was sipping on martinis with the other girls when Cassie stormed into the dining area. âWhat got into your panties, rockstar?â She said teasingly.
Cassie was practically turning red, annoyed with the comment especially after everything that happened. âFuck off, Alexia.â
Whatâs an all-girl season without a little catfight? Come on girls, claws out! Itâs girl fight time.
âOh, I got on her nerves.â Alexia whispered to Jade, nonchalantly sipping on her cocktail.
Or not⊠Alexia seems too unbothered to even engage Cassie in an argument.
Everyone rushed to Cassie, comforting her and asking her what happened. Alexia stayed put, eyes wandering towards the direction of where Cassie came from. She finished her drink and swiftly got up, heading to where you were.
âËâĄâĄ âYour puppy dogâs making a fuss over there,â Alexia said as she walked toward you, a slow, smug smile pulling at her lips. âWhimpering to everyone like she hurt her paw.â
âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â You shot back in a low tone, not really in the mood to joke around.
Alexia shrugged as she lowered herself onto the daybed by your feet, facing you, casually resting her hand on your calf, fingers brushing your skin with a sense of familiarity. âI donât know⊠you tell me what that was about.â She raised an eyebrow, her tone playful but with an underlying seriousness. A moment of silence took over before she spoke up again. âSo⊠I take it that chapterâs closed?â
You hesitated, not knowing if you were comfortable totally just ending your chapter with Cassie. While you couldnât deny the chemistry you had with Alexia, you also werenât so keen on the kind of drama youâd have to deal with if you chose to be with Alexia instead.Â
Alexiaâs fingers lingered on your calf, looking at you intensely with her hazel eyes. âWhatâs going on in that head of yours?â She asked in a low and serious tone. âLooks like youâre still deciding whether you want to keep pretending.â
You snapped, finally meeting Alexiaâs gaze. âPretending?â You half-laughed, trying to act casual. âWhatâs there to pretend?â
The Catalan just shrugged back at you and raised her eyebrows. You groaned at her expression, feeling like Alexia was just playing a game to confuse you or drive you insane. âIâm not in the mood to play this game right now. I'm serious."
Alexia didnât respond right away. Instead, her eyes locked onto yours, and the playful edge in her expression disappeared. She bit her lip and leaned in slightly, pausing for a moment. âAlright, if you want serious, Iâll be serious,â she said, her voice now low and steady.Â
You met her gaze, your breath hitching at the sudden intensity. âIâm serious about you,â she continued, words hitting harder than you expected. Suddenly, your heart was racing in your chest.
Her eyes never wavered, never leaving yours. âThat kiss wasnât just a game. You felt it too.â she said in a deliberate tone. âI know you enjoyed my kiss more than hers.â
You scoffed, shaking your head. âYouâre so full of yourself.â
âMaybe,â she said with a small shrug and a smirk playing on her lips. âOr maybe I just know how to read you.â
She leaned in, slowly closing the distance. Her hand lifted, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. Her touch stayed, fingers brushing the side of your neck. Her palm was warm against your skin.
âI know youâre trying to be angry,â she said quietly. âTrying to act like that kiss and this⊠feeling you have for me doesnât mean anything. But underneath all that⊠I know you want to kiss me again.â
Your lips parted, ready to fire back, to call her arrogant, to drive her away. But before you could speak, her lips were on yours.
All the tension, the frustration, everything⊠just gone in an instant. Whatever bit of confusion and apprehension you had in your body melted away as you wrapped your arms around Alexia, deepening the kiss. You knew how this show went; there was going to be tons of drama making your way. But right now, none of that mattered.
All you could focus on was her lips on yours.
âËâĄâĄ While Iâm definitely cheering for Alexia and Y/N, the other islanders look ready to flash them a red card.Â
One of the islanders, River, shook her head and rolled her eyes after Cassie recounted your conversation.Â
âYou know what, you dodged a bullet, Cass.â She said as she put a hand on Cassieâs shoulder. âLike, obviously Alexiaâs been into her from the start but Y/N is shady. I bet sheâs just putting on this whole innocent girl act.â
Apple nodded. âSheâs definitely sneaky. I wouldnât trust her.â
âËâĄâĄ In the confessionals:
âI definitely had my eyes on Y/N when I first entered because she just seemed so different and meek but Iâm seeing that maybe thatâs just a facade.â River told the camera, shaking her head as she played with her rings. âI donât know. I donât trust her.â
Apple flipped a lock of hair from her shoulder to her back and rolled her eyes. âI donât care about her. I just know I want Cassie and she just handed me Cassie on a silver platter.â A playful smirk grew on her face. âSo, maybe I should thank her.â
Your best friend Jade sighed, crossing her arms. âI think everyone is going to regret acting like this because this is fucking Love Island.â She said, looking exasperated. âItâs not Friend Island or Commit-with-your-first-couple Island. Thatâs just not the game!â
âËâĄâĄ Your magical moment with Alexia was short-lived because you were still coupled up with Cassie, which meant you still had to sleep in bed together. You were initially worried but realized that this meant Cassie was going to let you breathe tonight and not suffocate you with her cuddles. So, even if that meant it was awkward as fuck sharing a bed with her, it was still a win for you.
âËâĄâĄ Despite having the best sleep in the villa youâve had so far, you still woke up earlier than everyone else. You looked over to Alexia and Savannahâs bed which only had Savannah now sprawled on the bed. A blush crept across your face at the thought of having a moment alone with Alexia while everyone else was asleep.Â
This time, you decided to put on a bit more makeup and wear a cuter bikini before heading out to the pool area. As soon as you walked out to the open area, you heard a low wolf whistle. âOh guapa.â You looked over to Alexia who was in the middle of a mat workout.Â
You walked over to Alexia who had now stood up and was quick to wrap her arms around you, pulling you in closer, putting a kiss on your cheek. âGood morning,â she cooed. âYou slept well?â
âMmhhmm,â you said as you enjoyed the sensation of Alexia peppering kisses on your jaw and neck. You giggled and pushed her a bit away, feeling incredibly flustered by the feeling of her lips. âWell, someoneâs in the mood.â
She smirked, a hand still wrapped around your waist. "Yeah, I've been wanting to do that ever since I saw you but Miss Emo Popstar was always in the way."
You chuckled but rolled your eyes. "You're actually so mean."
She chuckled. "Hmmm, but you still have got a crush on me," she teased, leaning in to plant another kiss on your cheek. âSo, are you going for a morning swim? Or do you want to have a little talk first?â
âHmm, a talk sounds great.â
âËâĄâĄ Alexia and you sat in one of the morning day beds, a cautious distance between the two of you. While the conversation started off a bit awkward and stiff, it eventually flowed naturally and after a while, you two were laughing and relating pretty well with each other.
Alexia talked about her career, her ACL injury, her doubts after her injury. Her eyes sparkled whenever she talked about football; it was obvious that she was passionate which drew you in even more since you felt the same way about music. You told Alexia about how you got into songwriting, being an introvert who had massive stage fright, but how you were trying to come out of your shell now as a singer, forced to be in the public eye.
âSo, Love Island must be you stepping out of your comfort zone,â Alexia said, hazel eyes scanning yours.
You nodded. âYeah, itâs a huge pressure for someone who never really liked having attention on them but also⊠cause Iâve never been in a long-term relationship before.â
Alexiaâs jaw dropped. âAre you serious?â
You nodded. âIs that like a red flag or something?â
She chuckled and shook her head. âI think thatâs cute actually.â She said, smiling. âHow old are you again?â
â23,â you said, ready to get defensive. âAnd I know Iâm younger but I swear, I can be mature.â
Alexia laughed. âDonât worry. I can tell.â
You bit your lip and nodded nervously. âDoes my age bother you?â
She shook her head. âDoes my age bother you?â
âNot at all,â you responded.
âGood,â she hummed. She put a hand on your thigh, which sent electricity through your body. It felt like all doubts and apprehension you had about Alexia just fizzled away.
Everything felt just right.
âËâĄâĄ It had been just under a week, but the Love Island setup made it feel like time moved in slow motion. With no phones, no books, no music, not even a deck of cards, your entire world had shrunk to this villa and the people inside it. You spent nearly every hour of the day talking to Alexia, Jade, and the other Islanders, caught in this strange bubble where real life felt far away.
And while it was kind of nice to feel disconnected from everything else, it also gave you way too much time to think. Especially about Alexia.
Youâd had crushes before, sure. Situationships. Passing things. But this? This felt different. With Alexia, it was like something had clicked and short-circuited at the same time. She made you feel something new and intense, something you didnât have a name for yet.Â
And the worst part was you couldnât escape it. You lived in the same space, shared the same room, breathed the same air. There was no time apart. At least not completely.
But it wasnât just the feelings that were getting to you. It was everything else too. The way half the villa looked at you like you were a villain for how things ended with Casey. Like youâd personally gone out of your way to break her heart on live TV, as if it was just out of spite. Never mind the fact that this was literally the point of the show. That you were all here to explore connections. Some people had already made up their minds about you being the villain, and it stung more than youâd like to admit.
It was all getting to you. You thought you mentally prepared yourself for the drama but maybe you lacked in preparing to actually have to deal with all these intense emotions paired with having to fight against losing your mind over other peopleâs perception. It was too much.Â
So, the next day, you decided a little space was what you needed to clear your head.
âËâĄâĄ âI GOT A TEXT!â
Jadeâs voice cut through the chatter, echoing through the villa.
You pulled yourself off the flamingo floatie, dripping as you stepped out of the pool, and made your way to the kitchen. Everyone started to gather around. You could feel Alexia watching you, but you didnât look at her. You couldnât. Not right now.
Jade held up her phone, grinning. âThe public has voted for the Islander who needs a spa day,â she read dramatically. âAnd the Islander who got the most votes is⊠Y/N.â
You blinked. For a second, you werenât sure if youâd heard right. Then everyone turned to look at you. You smiled genuinely, unable to hide your excitement despite the annoyed look from Casey.Â
âThat was exactly what I needed,â you said, voice quieter, more vulnerable than usual. âEverythingâs just been so overwhelming lately. I think I forgot how intense this would actually be. I know not everyoneâs happy I got it. Iâm sure Casey and Savannah have something to say. But honestly? I donât care. I think the public saw how rough itâs been for me, and Iâm really grateful for that.â
Jade paused, wiggling her eyebrows playfully. âAnd she gets to take any islander out with her on her spa date.â
A few people oohed under their breath. All eyes flicked toward Alexia.
You met her gaze for just a second. She wasnât smiling. She didnât look surprised. Her expression was calm, maybe even unreadable. But that only made your heart beat faster.
You hesitated. You wanted to choose her. You really did. But the truth was, she was part of the reason you needed this break in the first place. Your feelings for her were getting too loud, too heavy, and you needed to breathe before they swallowed you whole.
You looked away. âI pick Jade,â you said.
âËâĄâĄ In the confessionals:
âI like Alexia. I seriously do,â you said, pouring your heart out to the camera. Without the privilege of a therapist, you were starting to treat the camera like one. âBut thatâs exactly why I need space from her. Like itâs not even her fault; I just⊠canât deal with these feelings right now. Itâs too much.â
Casey sat cross-legged, arms draped over her knees, clearly trying to play it cool. âShe left me for Alexia, which whatever, thatâs the game. But then doesnât even take her on the date? It just makes it feel like she doesnât really know what she wants.â
Jade grinned at the camera, bun wobbling on top of her head. âIâm not surprised, to be honest. Sheâs like my best mate here so I think I know her best and I can just tell that with everything going on, it makes sense sheâd want a break from everyone.â She smiled. "Well, everyone except her bestie, of course."
Alexia had her arms crossed but she had a serious expression. âIt would be a lie if I said I didnât want her to pick me,â she said simply with a shrug. âOf course I did. But I get it. Weâre all going through a lot. Iâm not worried though. This wonât be the only chance we get for a date. Iâll have my moment with her. I know I will."
âËâĄâĄ Looks like the Spanish captain is playing the long game. And even if she didnât get the date, she has something else thatâs rarer in this villa⊠emotional maturity.
And speaking of a lack of emotional maturity.
âËâĄâĄ Apple sat cross-legged on the sunbed right beside Casey, sunglasses perched on her head as she glanced toward the villa. âI genuinely canât tell what game sheâs playing,â she muttered to Casey. âSheâs either faking the whole sensitive act or sheâs just really bad at being honest. Either way, itâs getting old.â
Casey scoffed, shaking her head before taking a sip from her water bottle. âShe left our couple, didnât even look back, and now wants space from Alexia too?â She rolled her eyes. âItâs like she gets off on confusing people.â
Apple leaned back, lips curling into a smirk. âShe doesnât seem genuine at all. And honestly?â She tilted her head. âShe's just a dramatic mess. Itâs good you got out of that couple sooner than later."
Unbeknownst to them, Alexia had walked out from the kitchen and paused just behind the sun beds. She couldnât control herself after overhearing the conversation.
âYeah, good for all of us,â she commented cheekily as she walked into their line of sight. âCould tell she never really was in it with you.â
Casey furrowed her eyebrows. âSeriously, why are you even in this conversation?â
Alexia raised her brows, unbothered. âMaybe because youâre talking loud enough for the entire villa to hear. If you want privacy, try whispering.â
Casey stood up, pushing her sunglasses onto her head. âAlexia, can you just learn how to back off for once?â
Alexia let out a low, dry laugh. âWhen have I ever crossed your boundaries? Because from where Iâm standing, itâs you and your little group that canât stop running your mouths about Y/N.â
Caseyâs jaw tightened. âYou donât know what youâre talking about.â She retorted, trying to hurt Alexiaâs feelings. âIâve got a solid group of friends here and itâs not my fault they stick by me.â
Alexia shrugged. âMaybe instead of turning bitter and questioning her character, you should be asking each other why she didnât want to stay with you.â A playful smile grew on her face.
Casey straightened up her posture, eyes dark. âYou better watch yourself.â She said as she stepped closer to Alexia, looking her in the eyes as if she was in a stare down before a boxing match.
Alexia didnât move. She just put her hands up, slow and mocking, with a teasing smile on her face. âYeah, sure.â She chuckled. To further annoy Casey, she gave her a cheeky wink before walking away. "Don't hurt yourself, Casey."
âËâĄâĄ In the confessional:Â
Alexia chuckled. âCasey wants to act tough and all,â she said, an amused lilt to her voice. âSomeone needs to remind her that sheâs a skinny musician and Iâm an athlete. I wonât fight her because Iâve got integrity and because I donât think that would be fair for her.â
âËâĄâĄ You just returned from your spa day with Jade which helped you get the necessary time away from the drama in the villa. But you didnât expect to return to the villa with the tension even higher than ever.
Alexia was quick to greet you and pull you aside for a talk which, while daunting, meant being away from the other group's tension.
âËâĄâĄ âI know why youâve been distant and avoiding me,â she said once you were both seated, her voice quiet and thoughtful. Her finger idly traced along her bottom lip as she looked at you, waiting.
You glanced down at your hands, fiddling with your thumbs. âHmm?â
Your voice came out smaller than you meant it to, and of course, the flutters in your chest were back. They always showed up when she was near.
Alexia reached out and gently took your hands in hers, stopping your nervous habit. The touch was light, but the way she looked at you made your stomach twist in the best way. Her eyes met yours, steady and soft, and for a second you forgot how to breathe properly. Something about those hazel eyes.
Alexia didnât continue her statement but you knew what she meant instantly. She took her hand in yours, thumb rubbing against your hands. A silence took over between the two of you. It was that kind of loaded silence that just made your heart beat faster.
Alexia broke the loaded silence. âSo, if there was a recoupling tonight, can I trust you?â
Even after avoiding her and struggling with your feelings, you didnât hesitate to nod. âYeah, of course.â
âYeah?â Alexiaâs eyes practically lit up.Â
You locked eyes with the Catalan. You suddenly felt unfair with her, being so avoidant the whole day without having a chat to explain to her what was going on⊠but here she was, being understanding and patient.Â
Maybe it was her age but she was clearly more emotionally mature than anyone else in the villa, including you. It just felt like it was time for you to learn from her.
Instead of answering her, you delicately put a hand on her cheek, thumb touching her cheek as you leaned into her. You paused, taking one last moment to gaze into her eyes, before making the first move and capturing your lips with hers. The kiss was gentle and soft at first until Alexia put a hand behind your neck, deepening the kiss. It was the kind of kiss that made you feel weak in the knees and light-headed.
Suddenly, everything just felt right.
âËâĄâĄ And as expected, the recoupling happened that night. Since it was the first sapphic version of the show, it was being done differently. Instead of girls picking guys or guys picking girls, it was now all left to the public as to how everyone would couple up. For this particular recoupling, they voted on which islanders get to go first. Theyâd seen your drama with Alexia and Casey. They saw the other islandersâ drama. It seemed like they knew best what line up to follow.
Luckily, you went first and there was no doubt in your mind. You stood in front of everyone but your eyes were fixed only on Alexia.Â
âWhile things have been difficult the past week and Iâve tried to keep my distance because of my avoidant habits,â you started, your voice a little shaky, but warm, âthe islander Iâm choosing has always been patient with me. Sheâs shown me how serious she is with me, even when Iâve made it hard.â
You glanced down, biting your lip for a second before looking back at her.
âAnd Iâm finally ready to show her I feel the same, and that Iâm ready to go all in.â
You took a breath. âThe islander Iâm choosing is⊠Alexia.â
Alexia immediately walked towards where you were standing and she didnât hesitate. Her hands cupped your face as she kissed you deeply. The islanders erupted into cheers. Well, most of them. Casey and Savannah barely clapped.
But that didnât matter. For the first time, it felt like the pairing was right. Like you were exactly where you were supposed to be.
âËâĄâĄ The next days (and episodes) really went by smoothly for the two of you. The drama between you and the other islanders was soon forgotten as new drama emerged. Now, you and Alexia were getting along well with your bond growing stronger each day. At times, it felt like you two were just on vacation, relaxing, without a care in the world. Things were going well, and for once, you let yourself believe that everything was falling into place.
âËâĄâĄ But as always, Love Island is never about smooth sailing. As things were finally settling into a comfortable rhythm between you and Alexia, the producers had to rock the boat.
âËâĄâĄ âI got a text!â You exclaimed from the kitchen where you were making a coffee, your voice cutting throughout the villa.Â
Everyone approached you, murmurs swirling around, excitement hanging in the air. No one had entered the villa in a while, so they were eager for any sort of news about a potential bombshell.
You opened the message aloud, and as soon as the words left your mouth, the room fell into stunned silence. âI donât wanna step on anyoneâs boots, but Y/N, you definitely caught my eye. I hope you donât mind me stealing you away. Get ready for our date in 10 minutes. #GoalGetter #NoSuchThingAsTeammates.â
The reaction was immediate. Shouts, gasps, and excited chatter filled the space. It was clear that the mystery person was likely another footballer⊠and judging by the wording of the message, she was probably someone Alexia knew well. Everyoneâs eyes were suddenly on Alexia. Though she seemed unbothered, you could see a furrow in her brow, her mind obviously working overtime behind those steady eyes. She wasnât too worried yet⊠but she could feel that things were about to shift in the villa.
Before you could say anything else about the date, you were quickly whisked away by the other girls, all chattering excitedly as they helped you get ready.
âËâĄâĄ You nervously fidgeted with the hem of your skirt as you walked to the designated date place which was a nice Spanish restaurant. You bit your lip, not knowing who to expect.
As you walked towards the restaurant, a tanned girl with dark brown hair stood with a smile on her face. She was effortlessly dressed in a cream linen top and shorts; it was a casual look but it looked so effortlessly charming on her. She greeted you by reaching out to place her hand gently on your arm as she gave you a kiss on the cheek. âHey, you look amazing.â
A blush crept on your cheek, feeling intimidated by the girl. âThank you,â you responded. âYou look stunning too.â
You two sat in front of each other as a waitress swiftly came to drop off a couple of drinks. âIâm Patri, by the way.â She said as she extended her hand to shake yours. âIâm so glad you decided to join me.â
Patri and you had the typical exchange of niceties and question-and-answers. You were trying to carefully skirt around her text message, unsure if it was an appropriate time to ask her about it. But without prompting, she brought it up. âSince you didnât ask...â she chuckled. âIâm teammates with Alexia. We both play for the same club and for Spain.â
You nodded. âYeah, I got that from the text. I was just kinda scared to bring it up.â
She smiled. âScared? Why?â
You shrugged. âWell⊠I thought that if I knew for sure it would seem like a bigger betrayal for me to be on a date with her friend.â
Patri laughed, shaking her head. âOuch⊠betrayal is one way to put it.â She said, raising her eyebrows before taking a sip of her red cocktail. She paused. âBut really⊠the way I see it is, this is Love Island and Iâd be doing her⊠and well, you and me⊠a disservice if I didnât choose you out of courtesy.â
âCause even if you and Alexia got together first, I donât really want that to stop me from getting to know you.â She locked eyes with you, brown eyes full of sincerity. âYou were truly the only girl who caught my eye in that villa.â
The intensity of Patriâs gaze caused a blush to tint your cheeks pink. You bit your lip as you subconsciously tucked a hair behind your ear, diverting your gaze to the table. âWhy even me? Iâm genuinely so boring,â you responded, reverting to your self-deprecating ways as you grew conscious.
Patri chuckled. âWell, I think youâre obviously gorgeous, like, completely my type. And, you seem kind and genuineâŠâ she paused, âAnd well, it would be wrong of me not to mention that I already was a fan of your music before I even knew you were in Love Island.âÂ
Your eyes widened. âNo way!â
âYes, your latest singleâs actually in our locker room playlist; Iâm shocked that Alexia never recognized your name from our shared playlistâŠâÂ
You smiled at Patri as she continued to hype your music up, clearly a fan. It was cute and charming seeing her a bit fangirl-y over you. Something about being with her just felt⊠different from being with Alexia.
God, Iâm in trouble.
âËâĄâĄ Patri was nothing like Alexia.Â
While Alexia was more reserved and intense, Patri was extroverted and playful, making you laugh a lot and joking around. Patri was also touchy in a different way. Her touches were lighter, more subtle like brushing against your hand when she passed you something or feeding you a chip. It was playful and lighthearted. You couldnât help but feel at ease with her.
She made you feel completely different than Alexia did.Â
With Alexia, there was always an undercurrent of intensity, a sense that things were never quite simple, that every moment between you was heavy with meaning. But with Patri, it felt different. There was an ease, a simplicity that made you forget the complexities of everything around you. She made you feel like you didnât have to think too much, that maybe you could just be.
The date went by so easily, once the initial nerves had settled. You had a drink, then another. The alcohol helped loosen you up, but it was more than that. It was Patriâs presence and her effortless charm that made everything feel like it was falling into place. You laughed more than you had in days. It felt like you were both just going along with the moment, no expectations, no overthinking.
Before you knew it, you were kissing her.
You didnât even know how it happened at first. You figured it might have just happened after she joked about how good of a kisser she is but there was no way of knowing for sure. It just happened without a second thought, without the usual self-consciousness you usually felt on a first date. There was no thinking or analyzing the consequences; it was just you two having a good time.
Patri held your cheek as she deepened the kiss, locking lips before slipping her tongue into your mouth once you parted it. You hummed in satisfaction as you locked lips. Once she pulled away, you could feel your eyes flutter.
She giggled. âSo, was that good?â
âThat wasâŠâ You bit your lip, feeling giddy for a moment before suddenly remembering that you had Alexia nervously waiting for you in the villa. You cleared your throat, trying to shake off the giddiness that had taken over you just moments before.
Patri chuckled. âWell⊠too bad itâs time to go back to the villa,â she said. âIâd love to kiss you more.â
You smiled, trying to revert back to your more easy-going self early on the date but now all you could think about was how to deal with Alexia.
âËâĄâĄ When you returned to the villa, you could just feel the energy shift. Even if you and Patri had a good foot of space between the two of you, your chemistry together was just palpable. The cameras zoomed in on Alexia who might initially seem calm to any onlooker but the cameras did a good job of capturing her slightly clenching her jaw and raising her eyebrows. She wasnât exactly pleased to see that it was indeed her teammate and good friend who got in between the two of you.
âËâĄâĄ Is it just me or does Alexia look like she had just been benched? Not too happy about Patri scoring this time!
âËâĄâĄ Later that afternoon, Patri pulled Alexia aside to have a chat in the quiet corner of the villa. Without looking too much into it, youâd think nothing was off or wrong with the teammates but a closer look would tell that there was obviously some tension.
After the two caught up with each other on what was going on outside the villa, Alexia cleared her throat. âUh so⊠out of all the girls, huh?â She said with a half-laugh, intending it to sound casual but the edge was obvious in her tone.
Patri chuckled, seemingly unfazed but there was a fleeting hesitation before she responded. âIâm sorry, Ale. I genuinely didnât want any drama between usâŠâ she said with a calm voice. âBut Iâm here for love too and Iâd be lying if I chose anyone else to go on a date with. I have to put myself first.â
Alexia nodded, her lips pressed into a thin line. She didnât say anything immediately, and for a moment, it felt like she was weighing her response, carefully measuring each word. She met Patriâs gaze, her face unreadable.
âThereâs nothing to apologize for,â Alexia said finally, though her voice was quieter than usual. âI get it. You didnât choose her to start drama or hurt me; I know you and you arenât that kind of person.â
Alexia paused. âBut even if you didnât mean to, you have to know that that offended me. It did hurt.â
Patri opened her mouth to say something, but Alexia raised a hand, cutting her off. âItâs fine. Iâll get over it. I always do; it's the captain's duty to be the bigger person, right?â
For a long moment, neither of them spoke, and the silence seemed to stretch, heavier than before. Patri looked at the distance, not wanting to look at Alexia due to intimidation. She sighed. âLetâs just play it out,â she said, still averting Alexiaâs gaze. âJust like a friendlies match.â
Alexia chuckled and rolled her eyes.
âËâĄâĄ Is it just me or is Alexiaâs demeanor nothing but friendly?
If I were Patri, Iâd go running the opposite direction. RUN FOR SAFETY, PATRI!Â
âËâĄâĄ Confessional:
Patri sighed and shrugged. âI know Aleâs probably pissed, but what can I do? I chose the person I was most attracted to,â she explained with animated hand gestures. âIf her girl wasnât interested at me, Iâd stand down and back off⊠but she seemed interested. I canât just cower away just because of my respect for Alexia.â
In contrast, Alexia was more reserved, arms crossed. âI signed up for this, so I shouldâve known something like this would happen,â she shook her head. âDoesnât mean itâs easy. But thatâs what I get for playing the game.â
âI just feel like my trust is getting tested,â she looked at the camera now, eyes serious. âMy trust in both Y/N and Patri.â
âËâĄâĄ Later, in bed with Alexia, you could easily tell that something has shifted between you. It was just how silent Alexia was and how her gaze seemed harder, more guarded in a sense. You sighed, feeling a wave of regret.Â
âAlexia,â you whispered, trying to meet her eyes in the dim light.Â
She hummed, locking eyes with you. âHmm?â There was no softness or warmth in her voice or her gaze; she seemed so distant even if she was just right in front of you, cuddled up under the same duvet.
âAre you mad?â You asked, swallowing hard before biting your lip as you slowly moved closer to her, gently holding on to her arm for some physical contact. Your touch was almost tentative.Â
The entire day, you didnât really get to have a proper conversation. When you tried to talk to her about it, she brushed you off with a casual wave of her hand and a half-hearted, âItâs fine. Itâs all good.â But you knew better. You could see it in her eyes. She was obviously bothered.
This was nothing like what had happened with Cassie. With Cassie, there had never really been a real connection or spark so it felt easier to consider being with Alexia while still being paired up with Cassie. Now, you were with Alexia and the bond⊠is just different. Thereâs an undeniable chemistry and spark between the two of you but the pull you felt toward Patri was also undeniable.Â
With Cassie and Alexia, there was really no competition; Alexia was the clear winner even when you hadnât known it yet. But with Alexia and Patri⊠it was just different.Â
âShould I be mad?â Alexia asked after the long pause between you two. Since you didnât get a chance to talk about what happened during your date, you never really got to tell Alexia that you kissed Patri but of course, being Love Island, the news got around fast and reached her instantly.
You sighed. âMaybe,â you responded, being vague about it. You paused, trying to move closer to Alexia, perhaps seeking some sort of comfort that all was fine even if you had slipped up but the Catalan offered nothing of the sort, remaining still and unmoving.Â
Alexia sighed. âI just wanna know if youâre in it with me.â She said with a steady but low tone. âObviously, I still like you and I am getting feelings for you but if you donât feel that anymoreââ
âI still feel that way,â you interrupted. âI still like you.â
She hummed in response. âAnd Patri?â
You hesitated, trying to piece together a proper response but nothing seemed like it would sound right. âI think I like her too.â You responded, being honest. âI canât lie to you. I think while most my eggs are in your basket right now, I donât want to not consider Patri and just close the door on that possible connection.â
Alexia nodded, eyebrows furrowing. âNo, I get it. I canât expect you to be just tied to me. Itâs early days and itâs Love Island after all,â she responded, trying to sound mature.
You nodded thankfully, thinking it was all settled but when you leaned in for a kiss, Alexia stayed unmoving, not meeting you halfway or leaning in. You paused and just bid her good night before turning around, facing the opposite direction.
âËâĄâĄ The next morning, you woke up with a sense of guilt already settling into your chest. You thought maybe, just maybe, preparing breakfast would be a way to make things right with Alexia. The idea of quietly fixing things before the day began felt like a small gesture, something simple you could do to start mending the distance between you. But when you opened your eyes, she was already gone.
You looked around the dim room to see that most of the other islanders were still fast asleep in their beds, tangled in their sheets with their partner. The only other bed that was empty was Patriâs. You sighed, pulling the covers off of you to get up, deciding that a morning swim could help you clear your head.
Once you headed outside, you immediately noticed Alexia and Patri working out together, chuckling as if nothing was wrong between the two of them. You hummed, thinking that maybe the drama could be quashed by today and that there would be no issue with you considering Patri as an option while still partnered up with Alexia.
âGood morning, guapa!â Your typical morning greeting sounded different coming out of Patriâs mouth. You smiled at the two footballers, waving at them before heading over to the workout station, trying to act like you didnât have a million questions running through your head.
Alexia seemed warmer and less tense. She gave you a familiar comforting smile and something about it just put you at ease. It felt like her way of comforting you that everything was okay. You responded with a weak smile back.Â
âMorning,â you greeted her. âYou got out of bed early?â
Alexia shrugged casually. âHad to get a workout in,â she explained. âYou upset I left the bed without saying good morning?â
Patri chuckled softly at the question. You just gave the Catalan captain a small, tight smile and an eyebrow raise. Alexia tilted her head slightly and hummed at the response. âIâll make it up to you then,â she said with a playful lilt to her voice before walking over to you.
Before you could even react, Alexia was right in front of you. Her hand snaked around your waist, pulling you close as she captured your lips with hers, kissing you deeply and passionately. Your eyes widened at the sudden display of affection. It was obviously her trying to stake her claim right in front of Patri.
 Okay, so sheâs still bothered, you thought to yourself.
Patri let out a dry laugh, also taken aback by the sudden blatant display of possessiveness but she didnât say anything. After Alexia pulled away, you bit your lip and felt your cheeks flush from embarrassment.
âUh⊠Iâll go make coffee now.â You said, turning at your heel to walk away from the scene quickly.
âËâĄâĄ âShe did what?!â Jade exclaimed as you recounted to her what happened that morning. Her eyes widened and she looked incredibly scandalized. âDamn, Alexia really must be jealous of her to be doing all that in front of Patri. Itâs like those Alpha Wolves or whatever when they implant on their mate or something.â
You couldnât help but laugh at Jadeâs weird reference. âI mean, it was hot but also, I just felt kinda bad for Patri.â You said. âShe seemed a bit offended by it even if she hadnât said anything.â
Jade looked at you quizzically, raising an eyebrow. âWhy would you feel bad? Are you trying to tell me that you actually are considering Patri?â She asked. âJust yesterday you said that even if the date with Patri was fun, you think you were sticking with Alexia.â
You groaned, sinking into the lounge chair. âI know⊠but I just canât ignore the spark I felt for Patri too. I have to consider it too cause there is something there.â
Jade let out a sigh, leaning back as she crossed her arms. âCanât believe Iâm best friends with the messiest girl in the villa,â she joked but there was a subtle tone of concern in her voice. "I'm not looking forward to reading what people online have to say about you, love."
You playfully pushed her shoulder. âJadeeee, just help me.â You groaned. âIâm so lost right now."
âGirl, what do you want me to do? I canât choose for you.â Your friend exclaimed, shaking her head dramatically. âIâm just saying you gotta choose quick cause I just can sense that someone is going home soon. And it could be you or one of them if you donât choose ASAP.â
You sighed. You knew Jade was right. With Patriâs entrance, someone was bound to leave the villa soon and that decision might be left to you if the cards werenât in your favor.
âËâĄâĄ Later that day, Patri pulled you aside to talk, her voice calm, but you could sense the seriousness in the tone. âI know youâre still figuring things out,â she said, leading you to the daybeds. âBut I just really want to have a chat to see where your headâs at.â
You nodded, sitting down beside her on the daybed, leaving a decent amount of space between the two of you. Patri sighed. âSo, I know that you really are emotionally invested with Alexia already but⊠I want to know if your door is still open for me, like, do I still have a chance to get to know you and to be considered by you?â
You hesitated, taking a beat to think. Before you could respond, Patri spoke up again. âHey, I know we kissed andhit it off already the other day but if youâve made up your mind and you really want to stick with Alexia, I wonât be mad,â she reached out to take your hand into hers, causing you to meet her gaze. âIâd actually prefer if you let me down now than later.â
A part of you just wanted to take the easy route, tell her that you were definitely going to stick with Alexia and that youâd appreciate being her friend. It felt like saying anything else other than that would paint you in a negative light, probably counterintuitive to the intention of your publicists to get you good press.Â
But part of you just felt like taking the easy route was such a dishonest way to go. Even if PR was a main reason as to why you entered Love Island, finding love was also a big reason you agreed to it. You wanted to experience all the aspects of love and relationships, and doubt was one of them. It felt like doing yourself a disservice to just do an easy cop out.
âI havenâtâŠâ you paused to look into Patriâs eyes. âI havenât completely counted you out.â
A smile grew on her face. âYeah?â
You nodded. âI mean, Iâm not saying for certain that if there was a recoupling, I would choose you. I still have feelings for Alexia.â you paused. âBut, I wonât not consider you. Iâm still open to getting to know you.â
Patri nodded. âThatâs enough for me.âÂ
You smiled back at the Spaniard. She reached over to you, tucking a loose strand behind your ear. âSo, if you wanna test out the waters between usâŠâ she looked into your eyes. âCan I test it out with another kiss?â
You paused, looking around to see if there were other islanders nearby but with the coast clear, you meekly nodded. It felt wrong to be cozying up to Patri like this and letting her kiss you even if it had just been a couple days since you met her when with Alexia, it felt like there was more hesitation with you at the start of your relationship. But if you wanted to fully consider both options, you had to do something to test it out.Â
Patriâs hand moved to your neck, cupping it gently before pulling you in closer to her. She captured your lips with hers, slowly moving against yours. It started off gentle before it grew more passionate, more insistent. Unlike your first few kisses with Alexia, Patriâs kisses didnât feel like butterflies or fireworks. It felt more like a warmth forming in your stomach. It was intense in a different way.
Once you pulled away from the kiss, you sighed deeply, biting your lip.
Iâm in big trouble.
âËâĄâĄ You planned to have a sit-down dinner with Alexia later that night. Just the two of you, with no other islander around, no distractions or interruptions. You two skirted around the discussion long enough and you needed to completely clear the air with her, be honest and let all your feelings out. With the recoupling looming, it was pertinent that you discuss your own confusion and struggle but also to comfort her that even with Patriâs arrival, she was still the first person in your heart at that moment.
It was a good plan, something that could have helped you two a lot. But that plan? Officially out the window.
Just as you were preparing to pull Alexia aside for it, Jade got a text. As soon as you heard the notification sound, you knew it was too late. It was recoupling time, and you had to make up your mind quick.
âËâĄâĄ The group gathered by the fireplace, the flames crackling in the background as everyone stood in a loose circle, eyes darting nervously around the room. Sophie, the host, arrived with that look on her face. Before she could even say anything, you knew someone was going home.
Your stomach churned and you absentmindedly shifted from foot to foot, anxiety taking over you. Even as Sophie spoke, all of it turned into garbled nonsense in your ear; you were too caught up in your own thoughts to process it. Suddenly, Sophie was calling your name.
âSeems like Y/Nâs in a daze,â You blinked, snapped out of your thoughts, and immediately felt a flush of embarrassment. You hadnât even realized how much youâd zoned out. When you met Sophieâs eyes again, she was smiling, waiting for you to speak. âY/N, itâs your turn to choose.â
You gulped, stepping forward, settling beside Sophie and looking back at the group.Â
Immediately, you locked eyes with Alexia who gave you a weak smile. Your connection with her was undeniable; it felt solid. Even when she first walked in the villa when you were coupled with Cassie, something about her drew you in instantly. It felt like there had always been an invisible thread pulling you toward her. And the things she made you feel â butterflies, fireworks, the dizzy ecstasy you felt with her â was something you have never felt before. Her kisses felt like revelations and her touch always felt intimate, filled with a warmth and intensity that seemingly no one could ever replicate.Â
Having known Alexia longer, youâve also gotten to know her pretty well. You knew her quirks, her habits, her nuances; youâve accepted most parts of her already. Maybe it would have been an easy choice to choose her again.
But then, your gaze shifted to Patri, standing at the other side of the group. She gave you a wider smile, visually less tense than Alexia. While you only knew Patri for a few days, there was also a spark between the two of you. While it wasnât as intense as your initial connection with Alexia, there was something about her that made you feel at ease; it felt easier to be open to Patri, less intimidating. There was no tension with Patri. It all felt like calm waters with her.
So, maybe you were wrong and maybe Patri was the easier choice; after all, she got you to open up to her on one date in contrast to the initial pull-and-push you felt with Alexia. Coupling up with her would also give you a chance to explore that small spark, see if itâs worth it. But then that choice could come at Alexiaâs expense. What if the connection with Patri was just a new type of excitement over someone new and you send Alexia home for nothing?Â
Then again, what if you choose Alexia and never get a chance to know Patri? What if the spark you felt with her was worth exploring, but you wouldnât ever know unless you took that risk?
You took a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart. All eyes were on you now, anticipating your decision. It was a big choice to make but you knew the clock was ticking and no amount of hesitation was going to save you from having to make this decision.Â
âThe person I choose to couple up with isâŠâ
a/n: aaaa! bit of a dramatic series of events, isn't it? i hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it. i included a poll below on who you guys would choose if you were in that position. while i feel a lot of you would be picking alexia, idk maybe some of u would choose patri!
anyway, releasing the other fics in the playlist series soon so i hope you all tune in!
You spent your childhood drifting through foster homes, with nothing but a worn photo of two little girls and a note on the back: Your sisters, Alexia and Alba. You never imagined that at 25, after starting a new job, you'd meet them, through your boss who was your sister's girlfriend.
Word count: 11k
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The office is still when you arrive, early sunlight filtering through the blinds, casting soft gold stripes across the floor. You set your bag down, plug in your laptop, and sit for a moment in the silence just breathing.
Youâre not sure what today will bring, youâre halfway through replying to an email when you hear the click of the front door.
Olgaâs balancing two coffees and a paper bag from that little place she knows you love but never ask for. She glances at you, eyes scanning your face for something sheâs clearly already read in your posture. She sets everything down at your desk before heading to her own without a word.
You blink at the coffee then the croissant and spot the note under the napkin.
Eat. I know you probably havenât yet.
â O x
Your throat tightens, sheâs typing already, a headphone in one ear, hair still a little damp from the shower, clearly focused on her task, but she glances at you just once over the rim of her screen, a soft kind of check-in that doesnât require words.
You tear off a bit of croissant, begin to chew. âThanks.â
She doesnât look up, just murmurs, âYou donât have to thank me.â A beat passes. âYou look rested.â
You smile a little. âI laughed a lot last night.â
That gets her attention, she looks up, really looks at you. Thereâs warmth there but more than that, a calm relief âWith them?â she asks and you simply nod. Olgaâs mouth curves into a quiet smile. âGood.â
You take a sip of coffee. Then ask, âYou okay?â
She pauses before answering, âI am now.â Olga smiles softly. âI like when you laugh,â she says, like itâs not a big deal, like it hasnât just quietly set your whole morning aglow.
You look down, cheeks warm. âI like when you donât pretend to be scary.â
She laughs under her breath. âIâm terrifying, donât ruin the brand.â
You laugh too and just like that, everythingâs a little easier.
Thereâs so much behind that, and you both know it but neither of you push. You both work, emails, graphics, campaign planning it's ordinary, comforting and through it all, thereâs a thread of something stronger than routine. A kind of bond forged in chaos and kept alive by every moment like this.
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Wednesday mornings always carry a certain energy. Alexiaâs energy.
She arrives like a breeze that leaves the door open behind her, a reusable cup in one hand and her gym bag slung over one shoulder. Sheâs already halfway into a story about training before she even rounds the corner into the main office. ââand then Mapi slipped, blamed the floor, but literally no one else had fallen all morning,â she grins. âSheâs going to be unbearable about it all week.â
Olgaâs smile is soft, automatic. âTell her I said to be careful. Iâm not designing another injury post.â
Alexia chuckles, then her eyes find you. âHey, you.â She gives you that now familiar smile, something warm, tentative, like a thread trying to strengthen itself between two people still learning how to be.
âHey,â you manage your voice doesnât match hers, not quite. Youâre smiling, but your hands twist your pen a little tighter than they need to.
Alexia drops into one of the spare chairs near Olgaâs desk, bouncing slightly with excitement. âSo, mamĂĄâs doing dinner Friday. Proper dinner tablecloth and all and no oneâs allowed to cancel, Iâve decided.â
Olga smiles again, but it flickers. Sheâs looking at you now. You nod faintly. âThatâs⊠nice.â
âYeah,â Alexia says brightly. âItâll be all of us. You, me, Alba, MamĂĄ. Maybe even a little cava if we behave.â
You laugh softly, but itâs quiet, your eyes drop to your notebook. Olga catches it. Sees the way your shoulders donât quite settle, the nervous twitch at the corner of your mouth. So she jumps in ever so gently.
âY/N,â she says, casually, like sheâs only just remembered. âDidnât you say you had plans with Patri that night?â
Your head snaps up, eyes flicking to her. Olgaâs face is calm and neutral, but her eyes are soft and searching. You pause long enough that Alexia notices. She looks between the two of you, something cautious knitting behind her eyes. "Erm..." You swallow. âI⊠might. I donât know yet.â
Alexiaâs smile falters just a fraction. âOh. Okay. Well, if you can make it, it would be⊠good.â
Thereâs so much in her voice that you canât carry today. You nod. âIâll let you know?â
Alexia nods too, just once. âYeah. Sure.â
She rises again with that same energy she walked in with, but it doesnât quite bounce the same. She kisses Olga on the lips, waves to you, and disappears in a rustle of fabric and keys. In the silence you let out a breath you hadnât meant to hold, Olga doesnât look at you right away. She starts typing, deliberate, before saying gently, âYou donât have to go if itâs too much.â
You nod, then shake your head. âI want to.â She looks at you, turning her chair to face you, âIâm just scared.â
Olgaâs voice is soft. âI know.â She's up from her chair mug in hand, you go back to work, but not before she reaches over just briefly as she passes and gives your wrist the gentlest squeeze.
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Patriâs cart has only three things in it, and youâve already done two laps of the supermarket. âI swear we passed the tortillas like five times,â you mumble, toeing along behind her as she backtracks, again.
âThatâs because I wasnât sure if I wanted soft or crunchy,â she says, barely glancing at you over her shoulder, then adds with a grin, âAnd now Iâm sure I want both.â
You shake your head, watching her compare packets like sheâs making a life-altering decision.
The cart squeaks when you push it after she abandoned it in the middle of the aisle. She doesnât notice, or maybe she does and has no regard for anyone else to engrossed in her tortilla choosing.
You trail her into the next aisle, a row of cereals on one side and a wall of jams and spreads on the other. You lean your elbows on the cart, watching her scan labels. âIâm supposed to go to dinner with them Friday.â
She turns halfway, a box of oats in her hand. âYour sisters?â
You nod. âAlexia invited me like itâs the most normal thing in the world.â You pause. âIt probably is.â
Patri doesnât say anything right away. Just gives you a soft look and sets the oats into the cart like theyâre breakable. âYou going?â
You shrug. âI donât know. I want to.â
âYou donât sound like you want to.â
âI do. I justââ You blow out a breath and push the cart forward a little. âIt feels like if I sit at that table, Iâm saying yes to something Iâm not sure I know how to be part of.â
Patri turns, leaning on the handle in front of you, her expression gentle. âYouâre not saying yes to knowing how to do it. Youâre just saying yes to trying.â You meet her eyes, uncertain, she smiles, softer now. âThatâs all theyâre asking of you.â
You blink fast and look down. âIâm scared I wonât be what they want me to be.â
Patri steps closer, brushing your hand with hers. âMaybe try being what you want to be. Let them figure the rest out.â You nod slowly, the weight of it still heavy but less suffocating in her presence. She pulls you forward by the cart, just enough to make you walk again. âNow help me pick salsa. Iâve been burned before.â
You smirk. âYou mean that time you cried over a medium?â
She gasps. âIt lied to me!â
You laugh and somehow the aisle feels a little lighter, like maybe youâre already figuring out how to do this. You cuddle up beside her, "What about extra mild for the sensitive midfielder?"
"You're pushing your luck"
You tap her ass as you move away back to the cart, "You love it"
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Your phone buzzes on the kitchen counter, screen lighting up as you close the fridge door with your foot. You almost ignore it, assuming itâs Patri asking if you want to come over after training, but it isnât.
The notification makes you stop.
New Group: Hermanitas đ
You stare at the name for a second before opening it and thereâs a wave of messages already waiting.
Alexia: i was talking to alba earlier đŹ
Alexia: we were thinkingâŠ
Alexia: if it helps you feel more comfortable maybe you could bring Patri to dinner? and iâll bring Olga too?
Alba: only if itâs not weird tho
Alba: like if it makes it worse then ignore us đ
Alexia: but also you know
Alexia: less pressure maybe
Alexia: more wine
Alexia: more distractions
Alexia: less weird staring from our mamĂĄ đ
Your hand rests on the counter, reading the messages once, then again. You know what Alexiaâs doing. You can feel it in every word the careful way sheâs reaching, the way sheâs making it about options and comfort and not forcing anything. Itâs not subtle, but itâs kind, even if it's clearly been orchestrated by Olga.
You thumb out a reply before you can think too much:
You: i think that sounds⊠actually really nice, thank you đ«
Alba: ok but like
Alba: not weird couple stuff in front of me
Alba: iâm still adjusting đ
Alba: I now know how Alexia felt with me
Alexia: youâre the worst
You: đ no promises
You surprise yourself⊠you're not dreading dinner. Youâre looking forward to it, even if it is just a little bit.
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Patriâs apartment is a mess of hair tools, half-dried laundry, and open drawers by the time you settle in front of her mirror again. She stands behind you, toothbrush in her mouth, watching you fuss with your hair for the fourth time. âYou look fine,â she says, the words muffled through foam.
You glance at her reflection. âYouâre saying that while youâre foaming like a rabid dog. I canât take you seriously.â
She smirks, rolls her eyes, and disappears back into the bathroom. You breathe out, reaching for your earring the second one shakes in your hand. You're not even sure why youâre this nervous, itâs not your first dinner with them, but itâs the first where youâre walking into a place that didn't feel neutral ground. Youâre walking in with Patri, with someone who knows you, there's something terrifying about being known by two different parts of your life at once.
Patri returns a moment later, drying her hands, already dressed loose black trousers, simple white tee, chain necklace. No fuss, just her, effortlessly cool, your comfort zone. She steps up behind you again and rests her hands on your shoulders, you meet her eyes in the mirror.
âYou okay?â she asks, quieter now.
You nod. Then shrug. âMostly. Just⊠donât want to mess it up.â
She leans in, presses her lips to your cheek. âYou wonât.â You turn your face just a little, catching her mouth halfway, and kiss her back, slow and gentle. She smiles into it, âBesides,â she murmurs, lips brushing yours, âif anyoneâs going to embarrass you, itâs definitely going to be me.â
You laugh. âI donât doubt it.â
She grins and grabs your jacket from the bed, holding it up for you. âCome on then, baby sister. Letâs go meet the wolves.â
You narrow your eyes as you slip your arms in. âDonât call them that. Theyâre already protective enough.â
âOh, Iâm counting on it,â she winks.
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The house smells like garlic and roasted peppers. Thereâs music playing low from a speaker in the kitchen, and Albaâs already poured a glass of wine youâre not sure youâre ready for.
You and Patri arrive five minutes early, but somehow the house is already loud with conversation and laughter. Olga greets you first with a soft smile and a one-armed hug. Sheâs calm tonight, tucked close to Alexia like always, her presence grounding. Alexia, on the other hand, has her game face on smirk locked in place, eyes full of mischief.
She sees Patri step in behind you, and with all the dramatic flair of a footballer taking the pitch, she plants her feet, throws her shoulders back, and juts out her chest. âSo,â she says, voice teasing, âyouâre the girl dating my little sister.â
Patri just rolls her eyes, already used to her long-time teammateâs antics. âDo I need to give a what are my intentions speech before or after dinner?â she fires back.
Alexia lets out a laugh and drapes her arm around Olga, grinning. âJust know if you break her heart, youâre benched for life.â
Alba mutters from the kitchen, âI said Iâd do worse.â
You make a strangled noise in your throat. âYouâre all terrifying.â
âWeâre family,â Olga says sweetly. âItâs basically the same thing.â
Everyone laughs even you and somehow that breaks the tension enough for the dinner to feel real. You sit beside Patri who, despite herself, leans her shoulder into yours once the foodâs been passed around. Alexia takes the opposite end of the table, but you catch her watching you sometimes not suspiciously, not protectively, just curiously.
Patri reaches for your hand under the table once you squeeze back, âYou okay?â she whispers, leaning close.
You nod. âActually⊠yeah.â
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Plates are nearly clean, and a third bottle of wine has been opened. The room is buzzing with a warmth not just from the alcohol, but from the laughter, the low music, the way things feel possible tonight.
Alba leans back in her chair, eyeing you over the rim of her glass, âSoâŠâ she begins, drawing out the word like sheâs testing the water. âYou and Patri.â
You feel your cheeks warm before she even asks anything else. Patri quirks a brow and gives her a mock warning look. âDonât start.â
Alba ignores it completely. âNo, seriously. Iâm just curious. Like, how did that even happen? Youâre so quiet, and PatriâsâŠâ She waves a vague hand. â...Patri.â
Patri pretends to be offended. âWhat does that mean?â
âLoud,â Alexia offers from across the table, grinning.
âFearless,â Eli adds, smiling into her wine.
âAnnoying,â Alba finishes, smirking as she looks back to you.
You laugh softly, your fingers brushing against Patriâs on your lap beneath the table. âWe met in a bar, actually.â
Albaâs eyes widen. âSeriously?â
Patri nods, shrugging casually. âShe spilled her drink on me.â
You cringe. âIt was one drink.â
âShe was so awkward about it I had to buy her a replacement.â Patri nudges your shoulder. âI didnât even know your name, but you blushed so hard I thought your face would combust.â
Olga grins. âThat tracks.â
Alexia sips her wine. âDid you know who she was?â
You shake your head. âNo. I mean, I knew the name Patri Guijarro because a friend of mine goes your games, but not her face. Not in the moment though, I was too busy apologising to death.â
Alba laughs, then tilts her head, suddenly more sincere. âSo⊠is it serious?â
You look at Patri, Patri looks at you and sheâs the one who says it. âYeah. It is.â
The table goes quiet for a moment, but not tense just still Alba smiles then, a bit softer. âGood. Because if you hurt her, I will absolutely ruin your life.â
Everyone laughs even Patri, even Alexia, even you but there's a weight to it too. A sincerity beneath the humour. You glance at Alba. âI don't doubt that.â
Alba meets your eyes and nods. âYeah. I can tell.â
Alexiaâs talking football with Olga at the other end who looks bored to death, and clearly sheâs only half-listening, her eyes flicking over to your side of the table every so often.
Patriâs watching you, her cheek propped on her knuckles, eyes soft and full. Then she says it, casual but laced with a kind of wonder, "Itâs funny, you know⊠I saw you every week in that bar for weeks and couldnât build up the courage to speak to you."
You turn to her, a smile already pulling at your lips, the kind that happens without trying the kind only she gets from you. "I know," you say softly, amused. "Your friend Salma told me. Weeks before I spilled that drink on you."
Patriâs eyes widen. "Wait â what?"
You laugh and lean in a little, like itâs a secret meant just for her, "Salma told me youâd been coming in just to see if I was there⊠but that you didnât have the guts to talk to me." You lick your lip, "We had a bet going"
"A bet?" Patri sat up
You nodded, "How long it would take you to make a move, I won"
"How much?"
"100 euro"
Patri nodded seemingly impressed, "Nice"
"I bought that jacket of mine you think I haven't noticed you've stole"
"Can we rewind" Olga waves her hand about, "Patri, you were nervous of Y/N?"
Alba snorts into her wine. Alexia, clearly now fully listening, makes a loud, mock gasp. "Patri Guijarro, nervous?!"
Patri groans, sliding down in her chair as she mutters, "Iâm never going to live this down."
You nudge her knee with yours, still grinning. "Hey, at least I spilled a drink on the right girl."
Olga, watching the way you look at each other, murmurs just loud enough, âYou really did.â
Patri smiles like she doesnât quite know what to do with herself. You can tell by the way her fingers brush yours again featherlight, like a question she's already sure of the answer to.
Alba looks between you two, then sighs dramatically. "Gross. I want it. But gross."
Alexia raises her glass. "To nice jackets, accidents, and overly dramatic footballers."
You raise yours, laughing, the glasses clink.
You notice Eli had made her exit part way through the conversation, as you moved through the home after excusing yourself, the laughter softened into background noise, the sound of wine being poured replaced by the scrape of cutlery being cleared and stacked. You slip into the kitchen without really thinking about it, drawn by the clink of plates and the low hum of the tap running.
Eliâs at the sink, alone, she doesnât look up when you step in but you see the way her shoulders tense, the slight hesitation in her hands as she rinses a dish and places it gently in the rack.
You hover for a moment, "Do you want some help?"
She glances sideways, caught off guard, but nods, "If you donât mind drying."
You grab a clean towel and take your place beside her. The silence is thick but not heavy, just careful. You dry slowly, matching her pace.
"Dinner was really good," you say. "The potatoes especially. Who made them?"
Eli lets out a quiet, almost embarrassed laugh. "That was me. Itâs Alexiaâs favorite. She always insists I make them whenever we do family dinners."
You smile, placing a plate down gently. "I get it. They were incredible. Comfort food."
She nods, focusing on the next dish. "She used to help me peel them when she was little. Always ended up with more potato on the floor than in the pot."
You glance at her hands older now, but steady. You wonder if they were the same hands that once buttoned your baby clothes, even for just a few short moments. You want to ask her everything. Why she didnât try to keep you. Why she never tried to find you. Why it feels like sheâs afraid to look directly at you now, but you donât. "I do that too. Fidget when Iâm anxious. You were doing it at the table your hands, they kind of⊠circle each other." She pauses and looks at you. "I thought it was something I picked up at the childrenâs home. But now I wonder if itâs just... you."
Her eyes shine not quite tears, not yet, but there's weight behind them. Emotion pressed down, for now. She swallows, "You noticed that?"
You nod, "I notice a lot of things. Especially things that feel familiar."
She doesnât say anything for a moment, just places the mug down, steadies herself, "Thank you for helping."
"Anytime," you say and mean it.
"Would you, would you maybe be open to us spending time together, just you and I?"
You nod, "I would"
Eli nods just the once, "Ok" You don't plan anything with her in that moment but its seems it was enough for her in that moment.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The night air is cooler than you expected, brushing against your skin as you and Patri walk side by side, hands almost but not quite touching. Sheâs quiet, too quiet, you glance over at her a few times, but she keeps her eyes ahead, jaw tight, her pace just a bit too quick for it to be casual.
Finally, you say it. "You okay?"
She stops, not dramatically, just stops.
You turn to face her, brows furrowing, the quiet suddenly louder between you. "Whatâs going on?"
She shifts her weight, runs a hand through her hair, "Alexia and Alba talked to me."
You freeze. "Okay...?"
She looks at you now, finally but her expression is unreadable. "About us. About⊠how we havenât slept together."
Your stomach drops, "Whatâhow did that evenâ"
"You told them," she cuts in. "You told them something private. Something personal. About me. About us."
"It wasnât like that," you say quickly, voice shaky. "It just came up. They were being, sisters. Asking questions. I didnât mean toâ"
"But you did," she says, voice rising. "Youâve known them five fucking minutes and you're already telling them things that are really fucking personal?!"
Your eyes sting, you take a step back, "It wasnât malicious. I was just⊠trying to connect. Everythingâs moving so fast and Iâ"
She laughs once, bitter and breathless. "Yeah, well, I feel like an idiot now. Standing here, finding out from your sisters that youâre apparently frustrated with how slow Iâve been.
You wince. "Thatâs not what I said. Patri, I care about you. I wasnât complainingâ"
"You embarrassed me." Her voice breaks a little. Not loud. Just raw. "You made me feel small." Your mouth opens, but nothing comes out, she shakes her head. "I thought I was being respectful. Thought I was giving you space. Turns out I was just giving you something to joke about with your new family. She's my friend man, I've known her years, she's my fucking captain!"
You feel the tears hit before you even realise theyâre falling. "Thatâs not fair," you whisper. "Youâre twisting this. I didnât mock you. Iâve never mocked you."
But Patri is already turning away, "I need to go."
"Patriâ" She doesnât look back. Youâre left standing under a flickering streetlight, your breath catching in your throat, the sound of her footsteps fading fast into the dark.
You donât know how long youâve been walking not really. The air stings your face now, dried tear tracks tight against your skin, footsteps slow and aimless.
Youâre still trying to catch your breath when headlights glide up behind you, soft and golden. A car slows and a window rolls down.
"Hey!" Itâs Alexia, her voice is too casual, too cheerful like she doesnât know the world just came crashing down on top of you. You glance over. Sheâs in the driverâs seat, Olga sits beside her in the front, and Alba peers out from the backseat, concern etched into all their faces. "Thought Patri was walking you home?" Alexia calls.
You stop walking, you feel everything in your body lock into place, your jaw, your spine, your fists. "She was" You give them a look turn and start walking again.
You heard her car start up again and she pulled back along side you, "Y/N Stop, talk to-"
"Are you serious right now?" you snap, your voice slicing through the night. "You thought this was a good time for a chat?"
Alexia blinks. "Wait, whatâ"
"Of course you thought it was fine!" you yell. "Because everything is always fine for you, isnât it? You get to be the golden girl the football star, the daughter Eli kept, the sister everyone loves."
Olga opens her mouth like she might say something, but one glance from you silences her.
"You and your whole perfect family keep blowing my life apart. You just waltz in like I should be grateful. Like I should fall to my knees because I finally have a family who want me now that Iâm not an inconvenience anymore."
You see Alba flinch in the back seat, her eyes wide, but youâre not done. You take a shaking breath, stepping closer to the window, to Alexia.
"Do you even know what itâs like to spend your whole life wondering why no one came back for you? To look in the mirror and not know a single damn thing about who you are?"
Alexia looks dumbfounded, "What have I done?"
âDonât play dumb,â you snap, your voice rising fast. âYou told her what I said. About us not sleeping together. That was private, Alexia. That was between me you and Alba.â
You shake your head, stepping closer.
âYou embarrassed her. You humiliated me. And for what? A laugh? Some bonding moment with your actual sister at our expense?â
She opens her mouth guilt written all over her face but youâre not interested in apologies.
âHow am I supposed to trust you after that? You donât get it, do you?â you say, eyes blazing. âIâve never had people. Never had someone to protect my secrets, my heart and I let you in. I let all of you in and in five minutes, youâve already broken something that meant something to me.â
No one says a word, even Alba who usually has something snarky or sharp on hand is silent. Olgaâs lips part, but you look at her, and she falls quiet too.
âYou and your perfect, shiny family come crashing into my life like youâre doing me a favour,â you go on, voice cracking now. âLike you saving me from loneliness excuses the fact that I was abandoned in the first place.â
You suck in a breath, barely holding it together.
âDo you even understand what itâs like to grow up not knowing why you werenât wanted? To find out years later that the people you needed werenât dead, or missing they were just living their lives without you? Cast aside, not spoken of again like you didn't matterâ
Alexia flinches and then you deliver the final blow.
âI wish I never found out you were my sister because the reality of knowing you is worse than not.â
You see her shoulders drop, like the airâs been pulled out of her, Olgaâs hand subtly reaches for hers, grounding her but youâre already walking.
Toward the alley just ahead dark, narrow, the kind of space a car couldnât follow through.
âY/Nââ Alexia calls behind you, voice softer now, please in her tone, but you donât stop.
âJust leave me alone.â And then youâre gone.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The locker room hums with pre-training chatter. Boots clatter against tile, lockers slam, and the familiar sounds of music and laughter bounce off the walls. Alexia sits on the bench, tugging her boots on, her mind only half in the room. Her phone buzzes against the metal beside her, she glances down at the screen.
Olga đŹÂ Incoming Call
She frowns and quickly answers. "Hey, whatâs up?"
Olgaâs voice is tight. "Has Y/N texted you? Called? Anything?"
Alexia straightens. "No. Why?"
"She didnât show up to work this morning," Olga says, voice quiet but tense. "I figured maybe she needed space, after⊠everything last night, but sheâs not answering her phone. Iâve text, called and getting nothing."
That gets Alexiaâs full attention, she stands, moving toward the corner of the locker room for privacy. "Youâre serious?"
"Dead serious," Olga says. "Iâve never known her to just⊠not show. And after how upset she was"
Alexia bites her lip, eyes scanning the room instinctively. She spots Patri sitting on the far bench, quietly tying her laces, her shoulders a little stiffer than usual. "Iâll ask Patri,"Â Alexia says quickly, she lowers the phone slightly and steps over. "Hey,"Â she says gently. Patri looks up, wary, "Have you heard from Y/N today? Olga says sheâs missing work and not answering."
Patriâs expression doesnât change much, but something flickers behind her eyes. She shakes her head. "No. Havenât spoken to her."
Alexia waits, but itâs clear she wonât say more. "You sure?"
Patri doesnât flinch, but sheâs quiet, measured, "Yeah. I'm sure."
Alexia nods slowly, uneasy. She steps back toward the corner and lifts the phone again. "Nothing to Patri either," she tells Olga. "Sheâs not getting involved, though. I think they argued."
Olga sighs through the line. "I shouldâve gone after her last night. I shouldâve made her come in the car. She looked⊠broken."
Alexia closes her eyes. "She told me she wished sheâd never found out I was her sister."
Thereâs a pause, "We need to find her, Ale. I'm worried."
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The sun has dropped behind a massive rain cloud by the time training finishes, casting a golden haze over the city.
Alexiaâs untying her boots when she hears Patri behind her âHeard from Y/N?â
Alexia turns, heart lurching with the same dread that hasnât left her chest all day. She shakes her head. âNo. Nothing. I keep checking my phone, Olga's been sat outside her apartment door all afternoon waiting for her to come home with Albaâ
Patri nods slowly. Then quietly, without ego or drama, âI know where sheâll be.â
Alexiaâs brows pull together. âWhere?â
âCome on. Iâll take you,â Patri says. âWe can grab dumb and dumber on the way.â
The car is silent as it snakes through the city. Patriâs at the wheel, Alexia riding shotgun, and Olga and Alba sit in the back, Olga clutching her bag like itâs holding her together.
No one really speaks. The weight of it all, the fear, the guilt, the silence between people who care too much and said too little fills the space.
They pull up outside the aquarium. The lights inside still glow faintly as the storm draws in, and itâs quiet, save for the gentle sound of the sea nearby.
Olga leans forward from the back seat. âWhy here?â
Patri shuts off the engine. âShe comes here when sheâs overwhelmed. Told me once that the jellyfish calm her down. She used to sneak into the computer room after hours at the childrenâs home. She'd watch videos of them, said the water made her feel like she wasnât trapped anymore.â
Alexiaâs heart twists, of course sheâd run to the sea when everything on land felt too heavy.
Inside, the space is quiet just the soft hum of filtered water and the rhythmic pulse of ocean light refracted through glass.
They walk slowly. Past reef tanks and luminous tunnels. Itâs Olga who spots you first.
Youâre seated on the floor in front of the jellyfish exhibit. Legs crossed, arms hugged around your knees, face illuminated in shifting blue light. The world has been too loud, too confusing and here, it's just water, movement, breath.
You donât hear their footsteps at first, but something in the air shifts that makes you look over your shoulder, Alexia is already walking toward you.
She doesnât say a word, doesnât ask if she can, she simply lowers herself to the floor beside you, close but not touching.
You're both quietly watching the tank, then she says softly, eyes on the jellyfish âPapa liked the jellyfish too.â
You blink. She doesnât look at you.
âHe used to bring us here when we were little. Me and Alba. He said they looked like they were dreaming, like they floated between worlds.â
Her voice wavers a little. Still calm, but deep with memory.
âAfter he died⊠I couldnât see a jellyfish without thinking of himâ
You say nothing, but your shoulders relax just a fraction, your fingers uncurl slightly on your knee Alexia finally turns her head toward you.
âIâm sorry.â
You glance at her. She holds your gaze now.
âI shouldnât have told Patri what you said. That was yours and I shouldn't have brought that up with her, it was out of line, I want to treat you as what you are, my sister, but I need to remember how overwhelming it is for you, I don't know how to make this okâ
A long pause, then, you murmur, âNeither do I.â
Alexia breathes in slowly as she nodded, her voice is quieter still, âBut I want to try. If you'll let me.â
You barely register there was someone behind you until she speaks, âCan I⊠have a minute with her?â Patri asks, glancing briefly at Alexia, who nods and quietly gets up, giving you space.
Youâre not sure why, but your stomach twists as Patri kneels in front of you slowly, like you might shatter if she moves too quickly. Gently and without asking she reaches for your wrists. You flinch, pulling back sharply. âI didnât do anything.â
Your voice is more defensive than you meant it to be more ashamed that she needed to check. Patri exhales, sitting back on her heels. She doesnât say anything right away, just watches you. Not accusing, not angry just worried. âOkay,â she says softly. âOkay. I just⊠had to check.â
You wrap your arms around yourself and look away. You feel small again, like every bad part of you is suddenly visible, impossible to hide. âYou should go,â you whisper.
She blinks. âWhat?â
You look at her then, voice cracking just enough to betray whatâs underneath. âYou should go. You deserve better than this than me.â
Patri frowns, confused, hurt. âY/Nââ
âYou do,â you cut in, firmer this time. âYou deserve someone better. Someone more⊠I donât know. Attractive. Confident. Normal. Not this boring, broken mess.â
The silence that follows is painful, but Patri doesnât storm off. She doesnât argue or try to fix you with some perfect line. She just swallows, eyes glistening slightly, and whispers, âYou donât get to decide what I deserve.â
You canât look at her, you stare at your hands. The sting of your words still hanging between you both.
Then, more quietly, she says, âCan I ask you something?â You nod, not looking at her, âDid it really bother you that much⊠that we havenât had sex?â
You pause, then shrug, not because you donât care, but because you donât know how to explain it not properly. Patri waits. She always gives you space like that, but this time, she deserves an answer. âItâs not you,â you say quietly. âI know itâs not you.â
She turns toward you slightly. You can feel her attention on you, even as you keep your eyes on the shifting water.
âItâs me. Itâs how I see myself. How I feel in my own skin.â You take a breath, then another. You hate the sound of your voice when itâs this vulnerable. âI know youâre being respectful and I love that about you, I do, but sometimes it makes me feel like⊠like somethings wrong with me, like Iâm not good enough. Not sexy enough. Like youâre waiting for something better to come along.â
You finally turn your head to look at her, your voice barely a whisper:
âI want to feel wanted too.â Thereâs a long, deep quiet, "you didn't always make me feel like that"
Then Patri shifts a little closer, her eyes gentle but burning with conviction.
âYou have no idea how wanted you are,â she says. âYou think Iâm holding back because I donât want you?â She shakes her head. âIâm holding back because I do. So much it scares me.â
You blink fast. Her hand reaches for yours slowly, letting you be the one to close the space. You do.
âDonât ever think for a second itâs because I donât want you. I do. All of you. Exactly as you are.â
You lower your head placing with the laces on your shoes to keep you busy, then, Patri speaks again, her voice low but honest.
âI havenât⊠initiated anything because when we do spend the night togetherâŠâ
She hesitates, not out of shame, but to be careful with her words.
ââŠyou wouldn't even get changed in front of me.â
You feel your cheeks burn, gaze dropping again. Sheâs not being cruel itâs not judgment. Just truth.
âSo I figuredâŠâ she continues softly, ââŠmaybe you werenât confident in yourself yet and I didnât want to push you or make you feel like you had to do anything just because I wanted to.â She swallows âI wanted you to want it and the only way Iâd really know that⊠is if you were the one who started it.â
You nod slowly, the sting behind your eyes returning again, "You were right to be mad" You raise your eyes, "But I don't want you to forgive me because you think something happened to me, you need to go be mad"
"Y/N" She watches you stare back into the tank for a moment, before getting to her feet and leaving you behind.
"Well?" Olga asks
Patri sighed, "I think she just broke up with me"
"What?"
Patri shrugs holding her car keys to Alexia, "I'll walk home, take care of her make sure she gets home ok" and just like that the best thing you'd had in years walked right by you like you weren't even there.
The jellyfish glowing and silence holding the weight of everything said and unsaid clogs your mind, until the faint echo of footsteps draws your attention. You glance over as Alexia, Olga, and Alba approach slowly, uncertainly, as if afraid to disturb something fragile.
No one speaks at first, they just stand there, the soft glow of the tank casting bluish light over all of you, reflecting in eyes that still hold exhaustion and unsaid things.
Then, Alba breaks the silence. "They're funny-looking little things, aren't they?"
She squints at the jellyfish drifting behind the glass, her voice casual, even light, but you can hear the intent beneath it she's trying. You blink at her, then turn your gaze to the tank again.
"They donât even have brains," she adds, frowning. "Just⊠float around bumping into stuff, somehow still alive."
"Sounds familiar,"Â you murmur, standing up and leaving them behind, you know they're following you, but you've always been good at switching people off to you.
You move slowly toward the massive shark tank, the water dark and swirling with sleek shapes gliding silently through it.
Olga stops beside you, her eyes wide with awe. âI never realised sharks were so... graceful,â she says, watching the shadows move.
You smile softly, stepping closer to the glass. âTheyâre incredible creatures,â you begin, your voice steady and sure now. âMost people think theyâre just mindless killers, but sharks have been around for over 400 million years. Theyâre apex predators, but they play a vital role in keeping the oceanâs ecosystem balanced.â
Olga leans in, clearly impressed, âWow, I had no idea. You really know your stuff.â
You shrug, a little shy but pleased. âIâve always been fascinated by them, their senses, how they detect electrical signals in the water, their social behaviours. Itâs like they have this whole world we barely understand.â
Olga's gaze lingers on you for a moment longer, her smile soft, "You broke up with Patri?"
"I don't want to talk about it"
"Ok" Olga nodded, "Do you want us to take you home?"
"Only if you drive and I can sit in the front"
You caught the smile Olga tried to hide, you were aware how childish you sounded but she didn't need to find it funny.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The market buzzes around you the sounds of bargaining, the rustle of paper bags, the scent of spices and fresh herbs hanging in the warm air. You spot Eli before she sees you, carefully choosing tomatoes with the same quiet intensity youâve seen in the mirror when youâre trying to steady yourself.
You walk up slowly, offering a soft, âHi.â
She looks over seemingly genuinely pleased to see you, âMi niña,â she says gently, setting down a tomato and reaching out to give your arm a squeeze. âIâm glad you came.â
You fall into step beside her, letting the noise of the market fill the silences between you. Itâs not awkward just tentative, like youâre both learning a rhythm neither of you ever expected to need.
A few stalls in, while sheâs weighing peaches, Eli glances at you âAlexia told me what happened,â she says quietly. âAbout what she and Alba said to Patri.â
You swallow, suddenly fascinated by the uneven cobblestones beneath your shoes. âI didnât mean to hurt Alexia's feelings,â you murmur.
âI know you didnât.â Eliâs voice is steady but carries that tired weight, the one that lingers after sleepless nights. âAnd I want to say this to you, they were wrong for telling her. That was your story, your trust you put in them and they didnât protect it, they want you to be their sister but they need to act like one towards you to.â
You blink at her, taken aback by the unexpected validation. She picks through some herbs as she speaks, almost absentmindedly.
âIt's a hard situation, we're all trying to learn and navigate through something we have no idea how to deal with.â
You nod, throat tight Eli gives your hand a gentle squeeze.
"It just needs some communication and boundary setting I think"
The conversation dips back into quiet as you both drift toward a stall selling fresh pastries. Eli eyes a tray of cinnamon-coated ensaimadas, then glances at you with a little conspiratorial smirk.
âThey say the calories donât count if youâre with company,â she says.
You chuckle. âWho says that?â
âMe. Just now.â She shrugs like sheâs daring the universe to disagree.
You both laugh, and itâs real light, unforced. A moment you never imagined having with her, and yet here it is, folded in between fruit stalls and spice jars.
Eli hands you a warm pastry and takes one for herself, nodding toward a bench shaded by a canvas awning. You both sit, elbows brushing, the market humming around you like background music.
After a beat, Eli speaks again, softer this time, âI want you to know something.â You glance sideways at her, she doesnât look at you yet just picks gently at a bit of sugar on her pastry. âIâm not trying to be the mami I gave up the right to be. I know I donât get to come back into your life and just⊠pick up where we didnât even start.â
You look at her then properly. She finally turns to meet your gaze.
âI just want to get to know you, as you, not the baby I lost. Not the girl I couldnât raise. Just⊠the person you are now.â
Your chest tightens, but not painfully more like something protective inside you loosening, just a little.
She adds, quietly, âI want to be your friend. If you'll let me.â
You nod, swallowing past the lump in your throat. âIâd like that,â you say. âI think I would really like that.â
She smiles this time with her whole face, eyes shining just a little and two strangers who were never meant to be strangers sit and share sweet pastries in the quiet. After you finish your pastries, Eli doesnât rush to stand, instead, she stretches her legs a little, brushing crumbs from her lap.
âDo you like flowers?â she asks casually.
You blink, then nod. âYeah. I mean, I donât know a lot about them, but⊠yeah.â
She smiles and tilts her head toward a nearby corner where a small flower stall is almost bursting with colour. âCome on then.â
You follow her, and she walks with purpose not fast, but steady, as though she knows this exact route by heart. When she reaches the stall, she speaks easily with the older man running it, switching from warm Catalan to Spanish as needed. Itâs clear she comes here often.
She gestures to a cluster of sunflowers. âThese were your fatherâs favourite,â she says, almost casually but you notice the tremor in her voice.
You glance over, heart quietly thudding. âHe had good taste.â
She chuckles softly. âHe really did.â Then she looks at you, eyes soft. âYou have his eyes, not the colour, in the way they move. Always watching people, thinking.â You feel yourself blush faintly and look away, unsure how to respond. She buys a small bunch sunflowers and white carnations and pays before you can even consider offering, âCome on,â she says gently. âThereâs a little bench up by the fountain I used to take the girls to after shopping.â
You follow her again, the bouquet tucked gently under her arm, and as you both sit again, Eli pulls out a little plastic water bottle from her bag and carefully places the flowers inside.
You watch her quietly, something twisting deep in your chest. A strange feeling. Not pain exactly just the ache of unfamiliar comfort.
After a beat, you ask, softly without looking at her, âDo you miss him?â
She doesnât hesitate. âEvery day.â
You pause. âMe too. And I didnât even know him.â
Thereâs silence. But itâs full rich and sad and okay, eventually, she reaches over and gently touches your hand. âIâm proud of the woman youâve become,â she says, voice trembling slightly. âEven if I had no part in making you her.â
You donât cry not exactly, but the tears sting a little, and when she opens her arms, you donât even hesitate.
You lean into her and, it feels like maybe something broken got stitched back together, even just a little.
After the fountain, after the tears, and after your arms had finally let go of each other, Eli tilted her head and smiled at you gently.
âWe should do something completely superficial now,â she said, swiping at her cheek with a tissue and handing you one too. âLetâs go buy something neither of us needs.â
You blinked, caught off guard by the suggestion. âClothes?â you ask, half-laughing.
âClothes,â she confirms, already rising and adjusting the bouquet in her bag like itâs simply a companion now.
You both end up walking to a quieter side street, tucked away from the usual tourist mess, into a little boutique thatâs airy and bright and smells like lavender and fresh linen. Itâs the kind of place you wouldnât usually step into too polished, too elegant, but Eli seems at home, offering a polite wave to the woman behind the counter, who beams at her like theyâre old friends.
âYou really know everyone, donât you?â you say under your breath.
âItâs a gift,â she replies, grinning.
She doesnât rush you. Instead, she browses lightly, then subtly starts holding things up against you. A pale green sundress. A deep blue blouse. A soft cream cardigan.
You roll your eyes but secretly itâs nice, someone seeing you like this.
âWhat about this?â she says eventually, holding up a long wrap dress, black with little embroidered constellations scattered across it.
You pause. âItâs pretty.â
âItâs you,â she says simply, then adds with a little wink, âAnd it would drive Patri mad.â
You flush, laughing. âOkay, now itâs weird you're trying to dress me up for a woman didn't show any interest in me like thatâ
âIâm observant and I have daughters who gossip like theyâre paid to do it.â
You turned back to the mirror to look at yourself in the mirror as you held the dress against you, "Then you probably heard me and her are over because of it"
"I heard. Surprisingly from Olga, not like her to gossip," Eli adjusts the fabric on your dress fussing like any mother would making sure you were holding up correctly, "It's a shame"
You hold your eyes in the mirror on her, "Is it?"
She hums, "I saw the way she looked at you, she cared for you"
"She didn't fancy me, she didn't want to-"
"Sex is not everything my dear, you want to find a woman who is your best friend who makes you laugh without trying because if you marry a dull woman who is great in bed, its not going to be great when you're bed bound with them and unable to" She stopped fiddling, "And you can have a lot of fun before you get to that part teaching them how to do it with your best friend"
You genuinely laughed, "Since you put it that way"
"Plus since my daughters love to gossip with there friends in my ear shot, from what i've heard, you wouldn't need to teach Patri a thing"
"Oh really?"
Eli nodded with a hum, "Really"
Eventually, you try on a few more things. She waits just outside the curtain, tossing in little comments now and then that are actually kind
When you finally step out in the constellation dress, she stills.
Her face shifts proud and quiet and a little sad all at once, âYou look beautiful,â she says, not trying to oversell it. Just honest.
"You sure?"
She nods, "It's a little long but I can hem that no problem"
You look at yourself in the mirror. It's been a long time since you agreed. âOkay,â you say softly. âLetâs get it.â
As you change back, she pays for it, despite your protests, and when you step back out, she hands you the paper bag with a little smile.
âEveryone deserves to feel lovely in something once in a while. You especially.â
You leave the shop arm in arm, the sun warming the cobblestones, the weight in your chest just a little lighter.
You donât talk about the past anymore that afternoon. Instead, you get iced coffees, walk back to her home, and people-watch. You tease her about how nosy she is. She tells you youâre too guarded.
You donât correct her.
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The door creaks as you push it open with your hip, a to go caffeine free coffee in one hand and the weight of a not quite healed argument still clinging to your shoulders. The office is quiet, too early for the usual hum of conversation or clatter of keys, but as you turn the corner, that hush is cut by the unmistakable sound of Olgaâs sigh echoing dramatically through the space.
You glance up to find her seated at her desk, legs swinging slightly, head tilted back like sheâs been trapped in the worst kind of purgatory, early morning admin with nothing to entertain her.
Beside her, slumped far less dramatically, is Alexia. One foot propped on a chair, hair tied in a messy low bun, her face is unreadable as she scrolls idly through something on her phone. She doesnât even look up.
Your eyes linger on her a second too long before you catch yourself.
âMorning,â you say cordial but clipped.
Olga perks up immediately, flashing you a grin that feels about five percent mischief and ninety five percent cautious optimism. âThere she is. Look at you, up early, looking fresh,â
You donât answer that. You just give a polite smile, one corner of your mouth barely twitching up, and move past them to your desk.
Alexia finally looks over, her gaze lingers. She opens her mouth like she might say something but then shuts it again.
You pull out your chair, setting down your bag, then your drink, then the stack of papers youâd been meaning to sort through since last week. You focus on that, not on how still Alexia has gone, not on how the silence between you stretches taut like a wire.
âYou two still not talking?â Olga asks with a huff, clearly talking to you but looking at Alexia.
You donât respond, Alexia does, her tone dry. âApparently not.â
You look up at that, sharp, eyes meeting hers, she doesnât flinch, she never does. âItâs not about talking,â you say simply. âItâs about trusting.â
Alexiaâs mouth tugs into something like a grimace, but she doesnât push it further. Olga watches you both like a spectator at a tennis match, sensing sheâs stepped into the tension without a helmet.
âRight. Cool. Love this vibe,â she mutters, sliding off her chair. âThink Iâm gonna go make a very strong coffee and pretend this office isnât emotionally suffocating.â
She wanders off, muttering under her breath, you and Alexia are left in the silence. You shuffle some papers, she crosses her arms and still she doesn't say she's sorry. You donât ask her to and maybe thatâs whatâs worse than yelling. The not knowing if the bridge will be rebuilt or just left to rot quietly, unspoken between you.
The tension in the office doesnât fade as the morning drags on. If anything, it lingers. You keep your head down, earbuds in, pretending to focus on an old training report that doesnât need reviewing. But every so often, your eyes flick across the office, watching Alexia pacing back and forth like a caged animal.
Sheâs been restless since you got here, more than usual, it would be comical, her muttering under her breath, grumbling about the chair being too low, the air conditioning being too cold, and her phone battery mysteriously disappearing even though sheâd definitely charged it last night, if it wasnât so deeply, pointedly irritating.
Olga clearly thinks so. âAle,â Olga finally groans from her chair, chin on her folded arms on the desk, âif you sigh one more time, I swear to god Iâm going to glue your mouth shut with glue.â
Alexia, perched by the window with her injured ankle propped up on a small chair, whips her head around. âIâm just bored, okay? Iâm meant to be training. This sitting around doing nothing shit is torture.â
âOh, I hadnât noticed.â Olga drags out the sarcasm like it physically pains her not to be dramatic. âYouâve only rearranged the pens on my desk three times.â
You fight the small smile that tugs at the corner of your mouth. You donât want to find this funny, you donât want to enjoy anything about Alexia right now, but her pout is so real and so unintentionally childish that you canât help it.
Alexia glares at Olga, then sighs, again, deliberately and leans back in the chair like sheâs being punished.
âI just feel useless,â she mutters. âEveryoneâs training, everyoneâs doing something, and Iâm⊠sitting here. Waiting to heal.â
That flicker of guilt stings in your chest. You know the feeling stalled, stuck, waiting for something inside you to stop aching. Olga speaks âMaybe you shouldâve thought about that before deciding to take on a five a side match against literal children.â
âThey were talking shit,â Alexia mumbles defensively.
âThey were nine, Alexia.â That earns a short, begrudging chuckle even from you, thereâs a pause and then Olga, not bothering to lower her voice, says, âYou know, this would all be more tolerable if you werenât also in your feelings about the whole Y/N thing.â
You freeze, Alexia doesnât, she just exhales sharply and glares at Olga. âCan you not?â
âWhat? Itâs the truth.â Olga props herself up on one elbow, expression flattened with that all too familiar tone of blunt affection. âYouâre moping. Itâs annoying and Y/N is literally right there trying to work while you do it.â
You donât look up, you click something at random on your screen ad you hear Alexia shift. âIâm not moping,â she says too quickly.
âYou are and you screwed up and I know you know that and I know you want to fix it, but you donât know how to do that without being defensive or emotionally constipated.â
You finally glance up, just in time to catch Alexia looking completely murderous, but she doesnât deny it.
Olga shrugs. âLook, Iâm team you two work it out. I am, but either do something about it or stop because I swear to god if you reorganise those pens one more time, Iâm going to scream.â You stifle a laugh behind your hand, Alexia throws a stress ball at her, it bounces off Olgaâs head with a dull thud. âYou throw like you injured your arm not your ankle,â she mutters, catching it lazily.
Alexia doesnât respond. You keep your eyes on the screen even though youâve reread the same sentence four times and absorbed none of it.
Then, finally, she moves tentative steps with her good leg, crutch under one arm as she hobbles the short distance across the office toward you.
Olga mutters something under her breath probably a sarcastic prayer or warning but neither of you acknowledge it.
Alexia stops just short of your desk, eyes soft but cautious. Like someone approaching a skittish animal. Like she knows one wrong word and youâll bolt. âCan I talk to you for a sec?â she asks, voice quiet.
You don't look up right away, you feel her hesitate, but she doesn't walk away. She waits, like Patri used to, but less sure of herself. You sigh when she doesn't give up, close your laptop lid, and glance up expression blank, but not cold.
She shifts her weight awkwardly, adjusting the crutch. âI know youâre still upset with me,â she says, with no forced emotion. âAnd I deserve that. I do.â
You stare at her a beat longer than necessary. Then finally, you exhale and softly, almost without thinking you ask, âHow long are you out for?â
Itâs not forgiveness, but itâs not nothing either. Alexia blinks at you, surprised. Then her shoulders loosen a bit. âThree weeks, maybe four. Depends how it heals. Sprained it playing five-a-side with the neighbours' kids,â she adds, half-smiling, a little self-deprecating.
You hum, barely amused. âHeard they were nine.â
âOne of them did a roulette nutmeg and called me abuela. I panicked.â You donât laugh, but the corner of your mouth twitches, she notices but she doesnât push. âIâm sorry, Y/N,â she says quietly, no speech, no excuse, just that. âWhat I said to Patri⊠it wasnât mine to share. I know that now.â
You nod. Just once. It's small, but it's acknowledgment, âYou didnât mean to hurt me,â you say, your voice calm but not warm.
Alexia shakes her head, eyes a little sad. âNo, but I did.â
That hangs between you both for a second, it isnât a full olive branch accepted but you didnât break it either and thatâs something.
âSoâŠâ she starts, way too casual for someone who knows sheâs about to prod at something delicate. âYou and Patri. Still broken up?â
You keep your gaze forward, flipping aimlessly through your paperwork, even though nothing on it matters. âYeah. Seems itâ
She nods like she expected that. Then, âBecause you didnât have sex?â
You close your eyes for a second, then nod slowly and you were still not looking at her.
Alexia doesnât miss a beat, âWhy did you not just sleep with her then?â
You blink and blink again, then turn to her with the slow, painful precision of someone trying not to yell in a hospital zone. âOh wow, Alexia,â you say, voice dry as desert air, âthat never occurred to me at all.â
She has the decency to wince a little but doesnât back off. Classic Putellas. âI just meantââ
âWhat? That I shouldâve sucked it up and gone for it? Pretended Iâm not completely terrified every time someone sees me without clothes on?â
She pauses and you keep going, not angry exactly, just exposed.
âI didnât not sleep with her because I just didn't feel like it. I didnât because I couldnât look at myself in the mirror, Alexia. I didnât because I was scared sheâd look at me and change her mindâ
Alexia is quiet now. The kind of quiet that means sheâs finally listening instead of trying to fix it with a one-liner and a shrug.
You sigh, shaking your head, rubbing at your temple. âI didnât need someone to sleep with me. I needed someone to make me feel like I could be seen and still be wanted. She barely showed she wanted me clothed so you can only imagine how I thought she would be when I wasn'tâ
Thereâs a beat and then, gently quiet in a way she rarely is, âShe did want you. She does want you.â
Alexia stares at you like sheâs genuinely baffled, her brow furrowed in that intense, earnest way she reserves for both Champions League finals and your emotional wellbeing.
âYouâre beautiful,â she says, like itâs fact, like it's obvious, like it physically pains her that you donât agree. âWhy do you not see that?â
You blink at her, deadpan, then gesture vaguely at her elevated leg, wrapped in ice, her sock rolled halfway down and a grimace still lingering from earlier. âYou have an ankle,â you reply, dry as ever. âWhy donât you just use it?â
Her mouth opens slightly, stunned into silence for a second before she bursts into a begrudging laugh, head dropping back against the wall behind her. âOkay, fine,â she mutters, smiling despite herself. âPoint taken.â
You allow yourself the smallest smirk before glancing back at your notes, the moment settling between you, you look up just in time to see Alexia limping over, dragging the chair beside your desk.
She plops down beside you with a sigh, resting her ankle on another chair, and then fixes you with a look that already makes you brace yourself. âOkay,â she says, âthis is going to be an awkward conversation, considering you're my little sisterâŠâ
You immediately groan, putting your pen down. âDo we have toâ
âLet me finish,â she insists, holding up a hand like sheâs the adult in this sibling dynamic, which somehow makes it worse. You cringe, already regretting whatever impulse let her get within ten feet of you, âPatri thought you were sexy.â
You squeeze your eyes shut like itâll block out her voice. âStop it.â
âNo, no, listen, before we even knew who you were, she used to go on about you all the time. Always bragging about how attractive you were. Like, stupid obsessed.â
You peek at her, horrified, âAre you done?â
âNot even close,â she says brightly. âShe showed you off like a proud dog mami, Y/N. I mean, full-on âlook at her, isnât she perfectâ vibes. Sheâd find any excuse to bring you up and not just about your face either, which, yes, she liked, weirdly.â
You groan again, sinking into your seat.
âShe loved that you were funny when you let yourself be. Said you had this dry, clever kind of humour that made her feel like she had to earn your laugh.â
Thereâs a silence then, not heavy, but not nothing either.
Alexia shrugs, âIâm just saying, it was never about you not being enough. If anything, I think she thought you were too good for her"
You donât say anything for a second, then, quieter, âShe still left.â
Alexia nods, softer now, âYeah, but maybe she was just doing what you asked her to doâ
You glance down at your hands, the silence stretches a little further this time, then Alexia clears her throat and leans back.
âOkay, Iâm done being the emotionally available big sister. This ankle is killing me and Iâm bored again.â
You huff out a small laugh despite yourself. âYouâre the worst.â
âIâm the best,â she corrects, kicking her good foot up onto your desk. âAnd I deserve snacks for this emotional labour.â
You slide a granola bar across the desk toward her without looking.
âTake it and never speak again.â
âYouâre welcome,â she says, grinning.
Alexia starts absently fiddling with your pens, spinning one between her fingers before clicking it three times in rapid succession like sheâs testing the exact frequency that will break your brain. Then she lines them up not straight, of course, but just off enough to trigger every urge you have to fix them.
You stare at her, âCan you not?â
She grins, âIâm stimulating the creative environment.â
You reach out and unceremoniously shove her foot off your desk, âStimulate a job. Somewhere else.â
"Can we stop saying stimulate" Olga muttered as she shuddered at the word
She dramatically recoils like youâve just committed a war crime.
âViolence against the injured? Disgusting.â
You glare. âItâs no wonder Albaâs always angry. Growing up with you? Iâd be furious every day of my life to.â
Alexia smirks, unfazed. âShe is and she still texts me first every time she needs to vent. Thatâs the power of charm.â
You roll your eyes and start fixing your pens back into their proper place, muttering under your breath. âMore like the power of shared trauma.â
âTomato, tomahto,â she sings, now tapping out a rhythm on the edge of your desk with another pen like a toddler whoâs discovered percussion.
You shoot her a look that promises death, âYouâre lucky youâre injured.â
âI know,â she grins. âItâs the only thing keeping me interesting this week.â You sigh, long suffering, and reach for your headphones the only line of defence you still have. âIâll tell Alba you said sheâs angry, by the way.â
âI said always angry, not just angry. Thereâs a difference.â
She laughs like sheâs won something, and somehow, you suspect she kind of has.
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You spent your childhood drifting through foster homes, with nothing but a worn photo of two little girls and a note on the back:
Your sisters, Alexia and Alba.
You never imagined that at 25, after starting a new job, you'd meet them, through your boss who was your sister's girlfriend.
Wordcount: 15.8k
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Youâre two months in, and youâre still not sure how Olga Rios manages to be everywhere at once.
Sheâs answering emails while editing a reel. Sheâs sketching out a content calendar with one hand and handing you a matcha latte with the other because she remembers that you donât do coffee, and that still surprises you a little.
Her loft-office smells like lavender and old books, even though the work is anything but quiet. Thereâs a gentle hum of creativity in the air half Spotify playlists, half the occasional bark from her dog, Nala, who has her own Instagram account with better engagement than most influencers you know.
You sit across from her at a wide wooden table covered in sticky notes, open laptops, two ring lights, and exactly one succulent thatâs definitely fake but somehow not thriving. Sheâs got that kind of energy, Olga. She makes things grow, unless you're fake.
âYouâre getting faster,â she says without looking up from her screen. Her voice is warm, honeyed, soft in the way that makes you want to lean closer, like sheâs letting you in on something. âThe captions today? I liked them. Youâre starting to sound less like a brand, and more like a human. Thatâs good.â
You try not to grin too much, but itâs hard not to. Praise from Olga is never handed out like candy itâs measured, genuine, and usually comes with a Post-it note suggestion five minutes later, but when she says somethingâs good, she means it.
You glance at your own screen three drafts open, analytics humming in a separate tab. You're starting to notice patterns, pick up her shorthand, even anticipate when sheâs about to say, âWe can do better.â Youâre getting the rhythm now. It feels like learning a dance. Awkward at first, but now... now youâre finding your footing.
âDo you ever sleep?â you ask, half-joking, because sheâs been up since six and somehow still looks like she floated here on a sunbeam.
She laughs, a soft, melodic thing that fills the loft. âOnly when a campaignâs not launching. So⊠not often. But I love this. I love seeing things come to life.â She sips her tea, eyes crinkling at the corners. âAnd I think youâre going to be really good at this.â Something about the way she says it makes your heart lift. A couple of month in, and youâre already certain, this isnât just an internship. This is the beginning of something.
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Itâs a quiet afternoon, the kind that settles like soft dust. The usual buzz of Olgaâs workspace is muted no clients calling, no urgent edits, just the rhythmic clack of keys and the occasional sigh from Nala, curled up under the table like she owns the place.
Youâre working side by side on a campaign for a small bookstore thatâs trying to grow its online presence. Olga is fine-tuning the carousel post for tomorrow, and youâre adjusting the tone of the captions trying to thread that fine line between charming and trying-too-hard. Itâs nice. Peaceful, even.
Olga breaks the silence without looking away from her screen. âDo you have anyone in your family who loves books like this?â
You pause. The cursor blinks in front of you. The question is soft, casual, not meant to dig but it hits something that feels like hollow wood. âIâŠâ You swallow. âI donât know.â
Olga looks up immediately.
You donât say anything else at first. The words stall. Itâs not that you havenât talked about it before itâs just that people usually donât ask, not really.
She tilts her head slightly, brows gently furrowed. Her voice lowers. âHey. You okay?â
You nod automatically, out of habit. But then, without quite meaning to, you add, âI didnât grow up with a family. I was left at a childrenâs home when I was a baby.â
The air in the room shifts not heavier, exactly, just⊠slower. Softer.
Olga doesnât gasp, or overreact, or flood you with sympathy that feels too bright and uncomfortable. She just sets her phone down and gives you her full attention.
âIâm sorry,â she says. Quiet. Real.
You shrug, though it feels awkward. âItâs fine. I mean, itâs just⊠how it was. I don't really think about it much now. I just⊠didnât have anyone to ask questions like that about.â
Olga nods slowly, like sheâs letting your words settle inside her before responding. Then, gently âWell, just so you know any time you want to say, âMy 'mentor' once told me this,â you can go ahead and start with me.â
You let out a soft laugh, surprised.
She smiles, warm and a little wistful. âI know itâs not the same. But youâre not on your own here, okay? Not while youâre working with me.â
For a moment, youâre not thinking about metrics or content calendars or trending audios. Youâre just sitting across from someone who sees you not just as an assistant or intern, but as a person.
The knock on the door is light but confident. You barely register it at first lost in the middle of scheduling posts for a new client who sells handmade ceramic earrings until Olga perks up with that unmistakable sparkle in her eyes.
She glances at the clock, then at you. âThatâll be Alexia.â
You blink. âAlexiaâŠ?â
Before she can answer, the door swings open and there she is.
Alexia Putellas. That Alexia Putellas.
Even if you donât follow football religiously, her face is familiar. The captain, the icon, the Ballon d'Or winner. The kind of person whose highlight reels show up on your feed whether you asked for them or not. And now sheâs in Olgaâs office, wearing a simple hoodie, black joggers, and the kind of calm confidence that doesn't need to shout to be heard.
She smiles when she sees Olga, and everything about Olga posture, eyes, even the way she exhales shifts in the softest way. Like a house when someone finally comes home.
Olga stands, brushing a strand of hair from her face. âAle, this is the one Iâve been telling you about.â
You freeze. Alexiaâs gaze lands on you, kind and curious. âSo youâre the apprentice,â she says, her accent smooth but clear, the kind that could make any sentence feel like a secret. âOlgaâs been bragging.â
You blink again. âSheâshe has?â
Olga shrugs like itâs nothing. âOnly a little. Maybe a lot.â
Alexia steps forward and offers her hand. âItâs really nice to meet you. Iâve heard youâre doing great work.â
You shake her hand her grip is strong, grounded and try not to look like youâre meeting a living legend, because you are. But sheâs also incredibly down-to-earth, her presence somehow both intimidating and totally easy to be around.
Olga comes around the desk and gently bumps Alexiaâs shoulder with hers. âShe only comes here to raid my snack drawer and steal my playlists,â she says, teasing.
Alexia grins. âAlso because I love you.â
Thereâs a beat of warmth between them that you feel rather than see, like watching sunlight fall through a window. âDo you want me to go?â you ask, half-joking.
Olga laughs. âNo way. Ale's just here to say hi before training. Youâre family now. Might as well meet the boss.â
Alexia raises an eyebrow. âIâm the boss?â
Olga winks. âIn football, yes. In here, you just eat all my almonds.â
You watch them and feel something shift inside you again like the quiet redefinition of what âfamilyâ might look like. Not always blood. Sometimes it's someone who believes in you. Someone who shares their space with you. Someone who brings light with them, just by walking through the door.
You glance at your screen, then back at the two of them.
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You invite Olga over to work because it feels normal now. Familiar. Safe, even.
Itâs late almost midnight. Youâve both been bouncing between drafts for a new campaign and clips from a client shoot. Nala is curled up on your bed, half-snoring, and thereâs the comfort of shared silence between you, broken only by the occasional sound of keys or a soft âWait, this transitionâs betterâ from Olga.
She gets up to stretch, as she often does when sheâs been sitting too long. Paces a little. You barely notice her eyes scanning your bookshelf until you hear her voice. Low. Surprised. ââŠWait. What?â
You glance over. Sheâs holding the small, slightly curled photo thatâs been with you for as long as you can remember. Youâve had it since before you could read. Two little girls. One smiling, the other not so much.
You never knew their names. Never knew why the photo was with your things. It was just⊠always there. Something old, something yours, but now Olga is frozen, staring at it. âWhy do you have this?â she asks, but the softness in her voice is already cracking.
You sit up straighter. âWhat do you mean?â
She turns the frame toward you, her eyes sharp now. âThis is Alexia. And her sister Alba. This photoâs from when they were kids. Iâve never seen this before, how do you have this?.â
Your mouth opens slowly. âWhat?â
She steps closer. âDonât play dumb.â
You shake your head, heart beginning to pound. âIâm not. I didnât know who they were. Iâve had that photo since I was dropped off at the home. It was in a box with my baby things, I never even knew there names.â
Olga stares at you like she doesnât believe you.
âI swear,â you say, voice trembling now. âI never knew. I didnât know.â
But she isnât hearing you. Not fully. Her jaw clenches. âSo you mean to tell me this is just some random coincidence? You had a photo of my girlfriend and her sister, and you never knew?â
âI didnât know!â you say louder now, trying to push through the panic rising in your chest. âOlga, I didnât. They were just two girls in a picture Iâve had it since I was a baby! One of my foster parents told me they were my sisters once but I could never see the resemblance but I, I don't know I just could never throw it away, it was left with me for a reason, I couldn't-â
âYou expect me to believe that?â she snaps interrupting, eyes suddenly fierce. âYou knew who Alexia was. Everyone does. You had the photo, you applied for this job, and you never once thought to say a word.â
Your breath catches. âI didnât even connect them to say something. Please why would I lie to you?â
But sheâs shaking her head, stepping back, betrayal flashing in her eyes. âI trusted you. I let you into my space. My life. And now I find this?â
She turns, grabs the frame, and holds it tightly like sheâs afraid it might disappear. You stand, reaching toward her helplessly. âPlease, Olga. Iâm not using you. I didnât know. I swear to you.â
But her voice cuts through the air like glass. âDonât say another word.â
She storms toward the door. âOlgaâplease!â
Her hand is on the knob already. âDo not tell anyone about this. Not Alexia. Not anyone. I mean it.â And just like that, sheâs gone door slamming behind her, the photo still clutched in her hand.
You stand frozen in your tiny apartment, the silence left in her wake louder than anything you've ever heard.
You donât remember sitting down. Just that suddenly youâre on the floor, legs folded awkwardly beneath you, and the room feels too still.
The candle you lit earlier is still flickering on the desk, scenting the air with warm vanilla, like any normal night, but everything has changed.
The photoâs gone. She took it.
You wrap your arms around yourself, unsure if youâre cold or just empty. Your hands are shaking. Your chest feels tight, like someone filled it with wet sand. You canât stop replaying the last ten minutes Olgaâs face, the anger, the betrayal in her voice. The way she looked at you like you were a stranger. Worseâlike a lie.
âI didnât know,â you whisper, to no one. Your own voice sounds small, cracked open. âI didnât know.â But the silence doesnât answer. It just presses in around you.
You donât know how that photo ended up with your baby things. You never questioned it. It was just⊠part of the mystery of you. Youâd imagined a hundred stories for it as a kid. A fantasy life you were left out of. Two unknown little girls you'd prop up when you had tea parties alone, two faces you talked to when no one else would listen but it never felt real. Not like this.
You wipe at your face and realise youâve been crying without noticing, not loudly, just slow, quiet tears that slip out like steam from a cracked mug.
You try to work. To check a calendar, finish a caption, edit a reel, but everything blurs. Your fingers hover over the keys, useless. More tears come. Not steady, but suddenly rising without warning like waves. You press your hand to your mouth, like that might stop the sob thatâs already too far out to swallow back.
You donât know what hurts more: the fear that she wonât believe you or the feeling that she already doesnât, and underneath that, a newer, stranger thought creeps in:
What if the photo really does mean something?
What if you're connected to them in some way you never imagined?
You donât know how to hold that. You donât even know if you want to.
The night stretches long and quiet. You cry again, not always with sound. Sometimes just with breath that shakes too hard, or thoughts that spiral too fast. You think about messaging Olga. You almost do, but what would you say that you havenât already begged her to believe?
Eventually, curled in bed, your chest aching and eyes sore, the exhaustion takes over.
You fall asleep and as your breathing evens out in the dark, the photo lives somewhere else now, in her hands.
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You shouldnât go in to work, you know that.
You didnât sleep more than a couple of hours, and when you looked in the mirror this morning, your reflection startled you, pale, red-eyed, shadows under your eyes like bruises that havenât fully bloomed. You look like someone whoâs been crying on and off for eight hours, because you have, but not going in make it look like you had something to hide, and you loved your job.
So you pull yourself together barely. Tie your hair back. Splash water on your face. Avoid your own eyes as you grab your bag and head out the door.
The walk to Olgaâs office feels longer than usual. Everythingâs sharp, the sound of your own footsteps, the brightness of the morning, the hum of people who donât know your world just came apart. You keep your head down.
When you get there, the door is already unlocked, she was here already, you step inside slowly. Olgaâs at her desk. Laptop open, headphones around her neck, Nala curled up on the rug at her feet. She looks up instinctively when you enter.
For a moment, nothing moves, then her eyes scan your face and she sees it. The red around your eyes. The way your shoulders hang. The hollow tiredness you didnât have to fake.
Her mouth parts slightly, like she might say something, but she doesnât. Instead, she looks back down at her screen.
You nod stiffly, not that sheâs looking, and cross the room to your usual seat. Every movement feels brittle. Too careful. You place your laptop on the table as quietly as you can, like noise might crack whatâs left between you.
You donât speak. Neither does she.
The silence is different today. Not the peaceful kind. Itâs tight. Pressurised. You can feel her not looking at you, can feel her tension radiating from behind her screen like heat.
Your stomach twists. You open your laptop. Try to focus on the client folder. Everything blurs.
You canât stop thinking about the way she stormed out. The photo in her hand. The fear in her eyes. The disbelief in her voice.
And now, sheâs right there but she may as well be a hundred miles away. You steal a glance at her. Sheâs typing something. Her jaw is tight. Her ponytail is a little messy, like she didnât sleep well either.
You want to say something. Apologise again. Explain again. Beg if you have to, but the air around her says not to.
So you sit in the quiet. Trying to work. Trying not to cry. Trying not to lose the one place that ever felt like it might become home.
Youâre halfway through pretending to work when the door clicks open behind you. Your heart stops, you know that sound now. You know who it is before she says a word.
âHola,â Alexia calls out gently, cheerful but quiet, as if sheâs stepping into a place where someone might be asleep or upset.
You stay frozen for a half second too long, then shift your body slightly in your chair. Not enough to seem rude, but just enough to make your back the most visible part of you.
Donât make eye contact.
Donât breathe too loudly.
Donât be more than necessary.
Olga looks up, and the change in her voice is immediate.
âAleâŠâ
Alexia steps in fully now, holding a brown paper bag and a takeaway cup tray. âYou were tossing all night,â she says softly, âso I figured you could use some sugar and espresso.â She walks over, places the treats beside Olga with care. âI got that oat milk one you like. And a croissant, because I know you never remember to eat when youâre stressed.â
Her voice is so easy. So full of quiet affection. It makes your throat tighten. Olga stares at the bag for a moment before letting out a breath you didnât know she was holding. She smiles, faint but real, and says, âThanks.â
Alexia leans down and kisses her cheek. Itâs a small, domestic gesture. One that wouldâve felt sweet yesterday.
Now itâs a stone in your stomach.
They talk for a minute, low and warm too low for you to hear clearly. It sounds like a small exchange about sleep, and schedules, and if Olgaâs eaten yet. You keep your eyes fixed on your screen, even though the words are swimming and nothingâs going in.
Then Alexia shifts, you feel her glance in your direction. âHey,â she says kindly, and you can hear the smile in her voice. âNice to see you again.â
You muster every scrap of civility you can find and turn your head slightly, just enough to meet her eyes for a breath of a second.
You smile a tiny, exhausted curve of your mouth and lift your hand in a half-wave.
She nods back, just as polite. Just as unaware. âBueno,â she says, brushing her hand against Olgaâs arm. âIâll leave you both to it.â
Olga doesnât look at you as Alexia turns to go. She just murmurs a soft, âThank you,â
"How do you take your coffee?" Alexia stops at your desk, she swallow as you look up at her, Olga watching intently.
"I um. I don't drink coffee"
"How come? Don't like it?"
"No.. I um, I can't have caffeine at all.. I um, its complicated but I have a heart condition so I-"
"My papa was the same," she nodded and your heart pulled, Olga must of sensed it and she spoke
"Amor, Y/N and I are very busy"
Alexia held her hands up, bid you both a goodbye, Olga eyed you before she watches her leave.
The door clicks shut. You exhale through your nose, slow and quiet.
Olga says nothing. She unwraps the croissant with deliberate care, and takes a small bite, her eyes still on the table, on her work, on anywhere but you and the silence that follows is full of everything neither of you are ready to say.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
Olga doesnât go straight home after work, she drives in silence. No music. No podcast. Just the low hum of the road beneath her tires and the sound of her own pulse in her ears.
She drives, to a quiet cul-de-sac on the outskirts of Mollet, where the streetlights buzz low and orange, and the houses are tucked behind tired gardens and climbing vines. She parks without turning off the engine at first. Just sits there, heart tapping a steady, uneven rhythm behind her ribs.
Eliâs car is in the driveway. Sheâs home. Alone. Just like Olga knew she would be. Olga takes the photo from the glove compartment. Itâs still in its cracked, worn frame. She hasnât looked at it since that night in the apartment. She doesnât need to. She remembers it perfectly.
She breathes in. Breathes out. Kills the engine.
Then knocks on the door, it opens almost immediately, Eli answers the door in slippers and a cardigan.
The house smells the same as always lavender, old wood, something faintly sweet in the kitchen. A candle flickers on the sideboard. Family photos line the shelves, birthdays, holidays, the girls growing older in frames that havenât moved in years.
They sit in the living room. Olga perches on the edge of the couch, she doesnât take off her coat, her fingers are tight around something in her bag. Eli watches her closely now, concern pinching the corners of her mouth.
âI have to ask you something,â Olga says, voice steady but low. âAnd if itâs nothing then we never have to talk about it again. Iâll forget it. Weâll both forget it.â
Eli nods, cautious. âOkayâŠâ Eliâs brow furrows. âWhat is it?â
Olga doesnât speak. She just reaches into her bag and pulls out the frame. Holds it gently in both hands and turns it around. Eliâs breath stops halfway through her chest. The change in her is instant so small and devastating youâd miss it if you werenât looking for it. Her hands freeze on her knees. Her face goes white, then pale-blue cold, like all the warmth was drained out in an instant.
Her lips part, but no sound comes. The silence says everything. Olga watches her. Doesnât blink. Eliâs hand, which had been loosely curled around her teacup, goes limp. Her entire face drains of colour not just pale, but hollow, like a piece of her just dropped through the floor.
Olga doesnât move. She watches the shift. The silence that thickens around it.
âWhere.. Where did you get this?â
Olga doesnât answer, she just says, âYou know who this has come from donât youâ
âIâve not seen that in twenty five years,â Her voice catches, âAfter.. Afterâ Olga nods once, jaw tight. Her throat burns with questions, but she asks none of them and still, Eli presses gently, almost begging, âOlga. Please. Where did this come from?â
âItâs true isnât it,â Olga whispers. âYou have another daughterâ
Eli closes her eyes. A beat. A breath and then, very softly, very brokenly, âYesâ Olgaâs throat tightens. Eliâs voice is barely there. âWe left that with herâ
âI donât understand how you could do it!â Eli sits frozen on the couch, hands clasped tightly in her lap. She looks older than she did twenty minutes ago. Like every word being spoken is peeling something back sheâs kept buried too long. âYou gave up your own daughter,â Olga spits, gesturing wildly to the photo still lying on the coffee table like itâs cursed. âAnd just carried on like she didnât exist? How?â
âI didnât carry on,â Eli says, voice low and shaking. âDonât you dare think it didnât break me.â
âThen why?â Olga demands. âWhy didnât you fight for her? Why didnât you tell anyone?â Olgaâs voice cracks, sharp with disbelief, her hands clenched at her sides. Sheâs standing now, breath short, pacing Eliâs living room like sheâs trying to outrun what she just heard. She hadnât planned to stay only to ask one question, but the answer shattered everything.
Eli is curled forward on the couch, her hands white-knuckled in her lap, her eyes wide and shining. âYou donât understand what it was like,â she says quietly, pleading. âShe was born with a heart condition. We didnât know what it was at first, she was so small always struggling to breathe. She couldnât even cry properly with out her lips turning blue.â
Olga stares at her, hollowed out. âSo you gave her away.â
âI thought sheâd get help,â Eli whispers. âWe couldnât afford the surgeries. We didnât have insurance or savings, I wasnât working at the time. My parents wouldnât help. We thought⊠we thought someone else could save her. I loved her enough to let her go.â
Olgaâs breath catches, just for a second, because she knows Eli means that. And still, itâs not enough. âShe grew up in multiple childrenâs home,â she says bitterly. âWith no one.â Eli flinches like sheâs been slapped. âYouâre the one who taught Alexia how to be gentle,â Olga says, voice shaking. âYou tell everyone family is everything. You cry at Christmas commercials, for Godâs sake. And now I find out that there was another child and you just⊠gave her up?â
Eliâs eyes are glassy. Her face is pale. âYou think that was easy for me?â she says, hoarse. âYou think I didnât wake up every night for years hearing her cry even though I hadnât seen her since she wasââ
âDonât,â Olga snaps, tears brimming. âDonât make yourself the victim in this. I think about her alone every night now,â Olga goes on, tears clinging to her lashes. âI see her sitting in that place, wondering why no one ever came back for her. Why her parents the people who are meant to love her unconditionally let her go.â
âStop,â Eli whispers. âPlease, stop.â
Olga stares at her, breathing hard, voice strangled. âAnd you never told Alexia. Or Alba.â
Eli looks down at the floor like it might save her. âThey were so young they didnât need to know, have that burden.â
âYou gave up your baby,â Olga says, gesturing to the photo on the table between them. âYou let her disappear into the system, and you never looked for her. Never even told your daughters they had a sister.â
âI didnât let her disappear,â Eli says, voice shaking. âShe was born sick. Her heart Olga, she needed something me and her father couldnât give her! We did what we thought was best for her!â
Olga stops in her tracks, eyes wide with pain. âSo you just gave her away and pretended she never existed?â
âShe wouldâve died if Iâd kept her!â Eli cries. âWe couldnât afford treatment we thought a hospital might place her with someone who could help. It wasnât abandonment, it was the only mercy I had left to give her.â
Olgaâs voice rises. âAnd youâve told no one. For twenty-five years. No one.â
Eliâs hands shake now. âBecause I didnât want this. This moment. This shame. This wreckage.â
âWell, itâs here now,â Olga whispers. âShe grew up in a childrenâs home, Eli. Alone. She had no one, she doesnât understand the meaning of family, I donât even think sheâs ever felt what itâs like to be loved. Do you understand that?â
Eli explodes raw, desperate. âLeave it alone!â The words come like a slap, louder than anything yet. âJustâshut up!â she screams. âYou donât understand what it cost me! You donât get to stand there judging when you werenât there!â
The front door slams open. âWhat the hell is going on?â Albaâs voice slices through the room like lightning. Sheâs standing in the doorway, flushed from running, alarmed and out of breath. âI could hear you both shouting from the street.â She looks from Eli, who is crumbling in her chair, to Olga, whoâs barely holding herself upright. âWhat the hell is going on?â
Olga turns away, shoulders hunched, face blotched with tears. Sheâs trying to breathe, but she canât steady herself. She just shakes her head, mutely.
Eli goes silent, too. Like she forgot anyone else existed. Her face folds in on itself caught red-handed by her own daughter. âWhy were you yelling at her?â Alba asks, stepping in, confused and suddenly afraid. âWhat did she do?â
âShe didnât do anything,â Eli croaks out, broken.
âThen whatâ?â Albaâs voice wavers. âWhy is everyone crying?â No one answers.
Olga breathes in sharply through her nose, sinks onto the armrest of the sofa, her shoulders shaking, barely holding in the sobs now.
Alba doesnât understand what this is, what it means but something in her bones tells her exactly what to do. She pulls her phone from her pocket, thumb trembling as she finds her sisterâs name. She steps back into the hallway and presses the call.
Alexia answers almost instantly. âAlbs?â
Her voice is warm, calm, but Albaâs isnât.
âAle,â she says quickly, âyou need to come to mamĂĄâs. Now.â
âWhatâs wrong?â
âIâI donât know, but Olgaâs here, and sheâs crying, and mamĂĄâs⊠somethingâs wrong. I think itâs big mamĂĄ was screaming at her I heard her from the streetâ
Thereâs a pause. Then, âIâm on my way,â Alexia says, sharp and sure. Alba hangs up, heart pounding, and returns to the living room where the air feels too heavy to breathe. Olga is quiet now, face buried in her hands. Eli sits motionless and Alba stands between them, caught in the middle of a secret she doesnât yet understand only knowing that whatever it is, her sister will make sense of it.
The knock is soft, but the tension in the room makes it sound like thunder. Alba leaps to open the door, her heart in her throat. Alexia steps inside, face creased with concern, eyes sharp, already scanning the room like something in her gut told her this wasnât just a misunderstanding.
Sheâs still in joggers and a hoodie, her hair tied back loosely, eyes sharp and searching. She takes one look at her sister and then scans the room freezes when she sees her mother, crumpled on the sofa. Her gaze lands first on her mother, whoâs slumped on the sofa, visibly shaken, hands clasped tightly in her lap like sheâs bracing for something else to hit. Then her eyes flick to Olga standing stiff and silent by the window, her back half-turned, her coat still on.
âOlga?â Alexia says gently, walking toward her. Olga doesn't turn. Her arms are crossed tight, like she's holding herself together by sheer will.
âWhat happened?â Alexia asks again, slower now, as her eyes dart back to her mother. âIs someone hurt? Whatâ?â
She steps closer, reaches out, instinctively placing her hand on Olgaâs arm but Olga flinches. Not dramatically. Just enough and then she pulls away. Alexiaâs breath catches. She stares at her, confused hurt.
âOlgaâŠâ No response.
Alexiaâs eyes flick between them again her partner and her mother, both visibly wrecked.
âWill someone please tell me whatâs going on?â she says, louder now, tension rising in her voice. âMamĂĄ? Olga? Talk to me.â Still, no one speaks.
Olga finally moves. Slowly, she reaches for the door, her hand trembling just slightly. âI need some air,â she mutters, almost to herself.
Eli rises instinctively. âOlga please, waitââ
Olga stops, her hand still on the doorknob. She turns slowly and whatâs on her face is something Alexiaâs never seen before. Grief. Betrayal. Disgust. âI canât even look at you right now,â Olga says, her voice hollow, strained. Her eyes fixed on Eli, who seems to shrink under the weight of it. âYou are not the person I thought you were.â
Alexiaâs breath hitches, heart pounding. She looks at her mother, sees the quiet devastation spreading across her face, and sheâs suddenly terrified. âWaitâOlga, pleaseâjust⊠what happened?â Alexia pleads, reaching after her again, but the door opens and Olga is gone.
Silence crashes back in. Alexia stands frozen, her hand still in the air, her heart breaking without knowing why. She turns to her mother. âMamĂĄ,â she says, voice trembling. âWhat did you do?â
Eli doesnât answer, she sinks down slowly, like the weight of those words took her legs out from under her. She covers her mouth with her hands, eyes spilling over with silent tears.
And Alexia stuck between the two most important women in her lifeâfeels the walls close in, a thousand questions pressing against her chest. Alba looks at her sister, whose hands are balled into fists at her sides. Alexia is staring at the door, stunned, shaken, sheâs never seen Olga like that. Never seen her walk away and whatever happened here, whatever broke her, Alexia knows it isnât just something they can fix. Itâs something that changed everything.
The cool night air hits Olgaâs face like a slap sharp and biting. She walks until the porch ends, then stops, clutching the railing with both hands, trying to breathe past the chaos inside her.
She hears the door creak open behind her, soft footsteps following.
âOlga,â Eli calls gently. âPlease. Just come inside. Letâs talk, mi amor.â Olga doesnât turn. Her knuckles are white on the railing. A long silence stretches between them.
Then quietly, without venom, only pain Olga speaks. âPlease tell me⊠their father at least knew.â
Eli stands still behind her, silence falling heavy again. Then a nod.
âYes,â Eli whispers. âHe knew.â
Olga finally turns, slow and rigid, her eyes burning. âAnd he still let her go?â
Eliâs voice cracks. âHe didnât want to. God, Olga, he held her all night the day she was born. He cried like Iâd never seen before, he just he knew we couldnât give to her what she needed. We didnât have the money, or the support. We thought it was the only way she had a chance. Giving her up broke him Olga, he was never the same after that day, his spirit, his health, everythingâ
Olga presses her lips together, shaking her head, tears gathering again. âThey lost him when they were barely out of childhood, god Alba was a childâ she says hoarsely. Eli nods, tears now running freely. Olga blinks through the tears. âSo you gave away your baby and because of that, you think it eventually killed your husband.â
Eli swallows a sob, covering her mouth, Olga turns away again, shoulders rising and falling, behind her, Eli stands on the threshold exposed, crumbling and inside the house, through the windows, Alexia is still watching, not understanding everything, but beginning to feel how deep this fracture runs.
The living room is too quiet when they step back inside. Eli gently closes the door behind Olga, whose eyes are red and raw. She doesnât move far from the entryway. Her arms are crossed tightly again, a self-made cage.
Alexia is still standing, tense, waiting. Alba sits curled up in the corner of the sofa, chewing the inside of her cheek, a nervous habit from childhood.
Eli breathes in deep like the confession sheâs about to make might crush her lungs if she doesnât hold herself steady. âSit down,â she says softly, looking to both daughters.
Alexia hesitates. âMamĂĄ, what is this?â
âPlease,â Eli says. âJust⊠sit.â Reluctantly, Alexia lowers herself onto the arm of the sofa, her eyes locked on Olga on the way she trembles. Sheâs crying again, and that frightens her more than anything. Eli moves to stand in front of them, hands clasped like sheâs in church, waiting to confess. âI never thought Iâd have to say this out loud,â she begins, voice shaking. âI thought I had buried it deep enough that none of you would ever know.â
Alba shifts uncomfortably. âWhat do you mean?â
Eliâs lips tremble, but she goes on. âYou had a sister. A younger one, she was born 3 years after you Albaâ
The silence detonates. Alba blinks. âWhat? You⊠youâre joking, right?â she asks, glancing at Alexia and then back to Eli. âIs this some weird joke orâ?â
âNo,â Eli says. âItâs not a joke.â
Albaâs face falls. âNo. No, that canât be true. I donât rememberââ
âYou wouldnât,â Eli cuts in gently. âYou were just a toddler, Alba. We, your father and I, gave her up. She was born with a heart condition. We couldnât afford the care she needed. We thought it was the only way sheâd survive.â
Alba stares at her, blinking hard like the words wonât compute. âNo,â she whispers again. âNo. Thatâs notâyou wouldnât do that. Youâre not like that.â
âI did,â Eli says, her voice cracking. âWe made the only choice we thought we had.â
Alba suddenly covers her mouth, her eyes wide and brimming with tears. She makes a small, broken sound as if something inside her just split clean down the middle.
Alexia, meanwhile, is still too still, she stares at her mother, jaw tight, eyes sharp with disbelief. âYou lied to us,â she says, flat and cold. âOur whole lives.â
Eli looks up, stricken. âAlexiaââ
âYou let us grow up thinking we were the only ones. Thinking that Dad died with no secrets. That we came from love. From honesty.â
âYou did,â Eli pleads. âI loved you every day of your lives.â
Alexia stands suddenly, shaking her head. âBut not her.â
âNo,â Eli whispers, ashamed. âNot like I should have.â
Alba sobs now, curling into herself on the sofa, shaking. Olga breaks down again. She tries to wipe her face but canât stop the tears. âI didnât want this,â she says hoarsely. âI didnât want to be the one who broke you. Iâm so sorry.â
Alexia looks at her, confused, wounded. âYou knew?â
Olga opens her mouth, but no sound comes out. âI found out by accident,â she finally manages. âI-IâGod, Alexia, I didnât want to know.â
Alexiaâs eyes narrow slightly, not in cruelty but in disbelief. She looks like someone just pulled the rug from beneath her entire identity.
And still, Alba cries softly in the corner, whispering, âA little sister... we had a little sisterâŠâ And across from her, Olga thinks of you. Alone in your apartment. Crying into the quiet, not knowing that the truth is finally breaking wide openâand that itâs going to change everything.
The room feels heavy, thick with silence and unsaid things. Alba sits on the sofa, knees pulled close to her chest, eyes fixed on the floor. She doesnât cry anymore just quiet. Unreachable, curled inward, eyes fixed on the floor, refusing comfort when Olga cautiously reaches out.
âNo,â Alba murmurs, voice barely audible. âNot now.â Olga pulls back, defeated, sitting down quietly a few feet away.
Alexia, however, is a storm, pacing, fists clenched, voice rising, âHow could you know and say nothing?â she snaps at Olga, eyes burning. âYou found out and just kept it to yourself? Do you have any idea how long we lived in the dark? How much this changes everything?â
Olga meets her gaze, her own eyes shining with tears. âI didnât want to say anything until I was sure. Until I spoke to Eli and confirmed it. Like you, I had a hard time believing it myself.â
Eli steps forward, voice pleading. âAlexia, please. Olga didnât keep this from you to hurt youââ
Alexia was now directing her frustration at her mother, firing questions at Eli with a mix of desperation and anger.
âWhy didnât you tell us? How could you keep this from us for so long? Why didnât you try harder? What about Dad, did he know everything? Did you ever try to find her again? Whatâwhat was her name?â
Eli swallows, unable to meet any of Alexiaâs eyes. âIâI donât know,â she admits finally. âWe⊠we thought it was better to keep it quiet. We gave her a name but the home just called her âBaby Girl.â Itâs probably been changedâ
Alexia stops pacing, stunned by the silence, the gaps in answers.
Eli has tears pooling again. Alexia looks at Olga, whose face is streaked with fresh tears. Then Alba remains silent, distant, lost somewhere inside herself. The room is fractured everyone aching, separated by secrets and grief, caught in a web of loss no one can untangle yet, and Alexia canât see her family healing from this.
The room is heavy with silence. Alba hasnât moved from her place on the sofa, arms wrapped tightly around herself. Sheâs staring into some unseen distance, tears dried on her cheeks, her expression blank.
Alexia still stands, breath shallow, torn between betrayal and sorrow.
Then, quietly, she moves.
She walks over and sits down beside Olga, not saying a word. The weight of her presence is everything and nothing at all. Her shoulder barely brushes Olgaâs. The contact is light, but to Olga, itâs enough to keep her breathing.
âI need to see her,â Alexia says suddenly, softly. âI need to know she was real.â
Her voice cracks on the last word. Eli blinks, startled. âWhat?â
âA photo,â Alexia says, turning slowly to her mother. âDo you have one? Anything?â
Eli stares at her daughters one silent and broken, the other just barely holding herself together then nods. She disappears into the hallway. For a long while, the only sounds are Albaâs sniffles and the soft creak of the floorboards as Eli moves in the other room. Then she returns. In her arms is an old, battered shoebox edges torn, the lid soft with age.
She kneels in front of the girls and opens it slowly, like unsealing a grave.
Inside theres a small bundle of ultrasound scans, worn at the corners, black-and-white ghosts of a baby not yet born. A tiny, creased hospital card with faded blue ink:Â "Baby Girl Putellas Segura."Â Her weight. Her length. The time she arrived. A white card stamped with one perfect footprint and one tiny handprint, pink and curled like a blossom. And then the photos.
There arenât many. The first few show Eli and her husband in the hospital room, holding a swaddled newborn between them. They're smiling, tentatively, cautiously, but with something fragile and full in their eyes.
In the next few, the smiles are gone. Eli looks down at the baby with red-rimmed eyes. Her husband kisses the babyâs forehead, his face twisted into something halfway between a smile and a sob.
In the last photo, Eli is no longer holding the baby. She is standing by the hospital bed, arms wrapped tightly around herself. Her husband has one hand on her back, but his other is empty. They both look like people trying to memorise the little girl on the bed before itâs taken away.
No one speaks. Olga covers her mouth with her hand, tears falling silently, the pain was radiating from the photos.
Alexia reaches forward, touching the photo gently with her fingertips, like sheâs afraid it might disappear. âShe looks like, us,â she whispers. âHer nose. The shape of her eyes.â
Eli nods, wiping her face. âI only looked at these once,â she says. âThen I put them in a box. I never looked at them again. I couldnât.â
Alexia glances at her mother eyes still confused, still hurt but quieter now. âShe was real,â she says, mostly to herself. âShe was ours.â next to her, Olga presses her hand against her chest, trying to breathe through the ache.
Alexia holds the photo delicately, as though it might crumble if she breathes too hard. Her thumb hovers over the image her parents, younger and terrified, their arms newly empty.
She glances sideways. Alba hasnât moved. Sheâs still curled in on herself, her chin on her knees, her arms wrapped tight like a shield. Her eyes are open but empty, staring into the middle of the floor, if sheâs heard anything, itâs impossible to tell.
âAlbaâŠâ Alexia says softly. No response, she turns more fully, holding the photo just a little closer in Albaâs direction. âDo you want to see her?â Her voice is quiet, careful. Not pushing. Just offering.
Alba doesnât answer. For a long moment, she doesnât even blink, but then her eyes flicker, just barely, toward the photo in Alexiaâs hand. She doesnât reach for it. Doesnât move, but that one glance is enough to crack something.
Alexia sees it. She leans a little closer. âShe looks like you,â she whispers. âWhen you were little.â
Albaâs lower lip trembles. Her breath shudders out of her like it physically hurts to take in air. âWhy didnât she get to stay?â she says finally, voice fragile and small.
Eliâs breath catches in her throat. She opens her mouth to answer but no words come. Olga whispers for her, âShe was sick, your parents did what they thought was best for herâ
Alba turns slowly toward the photo, then reaches out, her hand trembling as she takes it. She looks at it for a long time and then, in a barely-there voice that cracks in the middle, she whispers, âShe had Papa's chin.â
It breaks Eli. She covers her mouth, sobbing quietly, and Olga gently moves to wrap her arm around her. Alba doesnât cry. She just keeps looking, at the baby, at the past, at the sister she never got to love.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
You sit on the floor of your apartment, your laptop closed on the coffee table, long forgotten. The untouched sandwich from earlier is still in its wrapper, resting near your elbow. You havenât moved much since you got home. Havenât wanted to.
The apartment feels emptier than usual. Not just quiet but hollow. Like something inside you cracked open when Olga left, and now the silence has a place to live.
Youâve replayed that moment over and over. The look in her eyes when she saw the photo. The way she snapped. The disbelief. The accusation.
Youâd tried to speak, to explain, but she wouldnât let you. Wouldnât hear you. She thought youâd used her. That youâd known. That the photo meant something youâd kept hidden, but you hadnât known. You still donât know.
That picture had always been a strange little mystery to you. Left in the file the home had when you were a baby. Just two smiling girls, a sense of something warm and long-lost. Youâd stared at it often growing up. Not because you knew who they were but because they felt like a possibility. Like maybe, once, someone had loved you and now that photoâs gone. Torn out of your hands and taken into someone elseâs truth.
You wipe at your eyes again, but they wonât stop watering. Your throat aches from holding back sobs that keep forcing their way through.
You donât know whatâs happening.
You donât know what to do.
You just keep sitting there, waiting for a knock that might never come. A message. A clue. Something, but thereâs nothing. Just the faint hum of your fridge and the quiet ache in your chest.
Itâs almost midnight by the time you stop pacing your apartment. Your hands shake as you hold the phone. You scroll past a few names none feel right. Not now. Not after everything.
Then your thumb hovers over hers.
Patri đ
You havenât told anyone about her. Not even Olga. It was easier that way kept things uncomplicated. Casual. Hidden, but now⊠nothing feels simple or safe.
You press call.
She picks up quickly. âHey,â she says, voice warm and soft.âEverything okay, you never call this late?â
You donât answer right away. Your throatâs too tight. âCan you come over?â you manage. âPlease?â
She hears it. Whatever's in your voice. âIâm on my way.â
You donât move from your spot near the window until you hear her knock. When you open the door, she doesnât ask questions. She just sees your face red-eyed, exhausted, cracked wide open and steps in with arms that donât hesitate.
You fall into her without a word. Her hand runs gently down your back, grounding you.
Minutes pass before you pull away, wiping your face with your sleeve. âIâm sorry,â you whisper. âI just⊠I didnât know who else to call.â
Patri nods, patient. âYou can always call me. You know that.â
You sit on the couch. She sits beside you, close but not crowding you. Waiting. You breathe in deep. Out. And then, âI thinkâŠâ You pause, heart hammering. âI think Alexia Putellas is my sister.â
Silence. Patri doesnât laugh. Doesnât flinch. Her brow furrows, but her eyes stay soft.
You look down at your hands. âThere was this photo. Two girls. I had it my whole life it was left with me when I was dropped off at the children's home. I never knew who they wereâ You shake your head, tears rising again. âOlga saw it and lost it. Thought Iâd known all along it was Alexia and her sister. Took the photo. Stormed out. She hasnât answered my messages. I donât know whatâs happening. I donât even know if Iâm going crazy.â
Patri takes your hand in both of hers. âYouâre not crazy,â she says softly. âAnd even if it sounds impossible⊠it might not be.â
âI donât want anything from them,â you say quickly. âI didnât even know. I just⊠I want to understand. Why I was left. Who I was before I was just⊠no one.â
Youâre crying again, but you donât try to stop it now, Patri squeezes your hand, steady and sure, you donât say anything, but when you lean your head on her shoulder, itâs the first moment youâve felt even a little less alone.
Patriâs fingers thread gently through yours, her thumb brushing your knuckles. Your eyes are swollen, throat raw, barely holding it together. Then, in the quiet, she leans a little closer. Her voice barely above a whisper, warm and solid against the chaos inside you. âYouâre not no one to me.â
It stops your breath, you lift your head just slightly, eyes meeting hers. Thereâs no pity in her face. No fear. Just quiet certainty.
âYou hear me?â she says again, firmer now. âYouâre not nothing. I donât care if you donât know who you were before. I care who you are now and I see you.â
Your eyes fill again, but this time, the tears feel different. Not jagged or spiralling just full.
You nod. A small one. But itâs real. âThank you,â you manage, your voice breaking.
Patri leans in, gently presses her lips to your forehead. âWeâll figure this out,â she says. âTogether. Okay?â And in that moment, just for a heartbeat, you believe her.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The sun creeps in slowly through your curtains, tracing thin golden lines across the floor. You barely slept, but with Patri beside you, the night didnât feel quite as endless. She stirs first, brushing a strand of hair from your face. You open your eyes to find her watching you, soft and steady.
âCome on,â she says gently. âIâm taking you to breakfast before we face the world.â
You want to protest, you donât look like yourself, your stomach is a knot, and the idea of being in public right now feels impossible but sheâs already pulling the covers back and reaching for your pre hung up work clothes like itâs not up for debate.
You sit across from her, both of you nursing hot drinks. Patri tears a croissant in half and sets one piece on your plate without asking after you said you didn't want anything.
âYou donât have to talk,â she says, watching you. âJust eat something. One small normal thing before everything gets⊠complicated again.â
You nod, barely able to hold her gaze, but grateful, after a few bites that were dry, tasteless in your mouth, you whisper, âWhat if she never forgives me?â
Patri doesnât hesitate. âThen she doesnât deserve to be in your life." You blink at her. âSheâs hurt,â Patri adds, softening. âI get that, but if she canât believe you, if she wonât even try to, then thatâs on her. Not you.â
You glance down at your coffee. âIt just⊠it meant something working with her, i thought I finally had⊠something that made sense.â
Patri reaches across the table, hooks her pinky around yours. âYou do,â she says. âYou have me and Iâm not going anywhere.â
You nod, holding onto that, even if everything else is spinning, this feels real. When you check the time, you realise it's almost time to head in. Patri downs the rest of her coffee and stands.
She pulls you up with her, smooths your jacket at the shoulders, and presses a quick kiss to your temple. âYouâve got this,â she whispers. âText me when youâre done. No matter how it goes.â
You nod. She squeezes your hand once before heading toward the training facility down the block. You turn toward the office. Stomach heavy. Heart heavier but not quite as alone.
You donât know what she saw exactly, but in your gut it doesnât matter whatever flicker of healing youâd just started to believe in crumbles under your feet.
She looks up, your eyes meet, her expression doesnât shift. No relief. No kindness. No fury either just something unreadable, and somehow thatâs worse.
You almost step toward her, almost say her name, but the shame wraps around your ribs like wire. The same helpless, spiralling thought churns, Iâve made it worse.
You lower your eyes, quicken your pace, and cross the street without another glance back, by the time you reach the office door, your hands are shaking again.
The walls have started to ease back up, the ache in your chest back in full force and the photo, the truth, all of it⊠still just out of reach.
The office is cold when you step in, or maybe itâs just you. Either way, you donât take off your coat.
You slide into your desk, boot up your laptop, and stare at the screen without seeing a word. You hear her before you see her, the soft click of the door, the measured steps. She moves past without a glance. You hold your breath.
She settles into her chair, the rustle of fabric as she crosses one leg over the other, her keys clinking gently on her desk. Then after what feels like an entire hour folded into thirty seconds "How did you meet Patri?"
Her voice is calm, almost too calm, you glance over. Sheâs not looking at you, her fingers are gently tapping her mug, as though itâs just any other morning.
You swallow. âI, umâŠâ Your throat is dry. âI met her in a bar. A few weeks ago. After work.â
You watch her profile, trying to read her, but she gives you nothing.
âShe didnât know who I was,â you add. âTo you. I didnât tell her. At firstâ
Silence, you brace for something accusation, coldness, anything, but all she says is, âDo you love her?â
The question stuns you, not because you hadnât thought about it, but because you never expected her to ask. âI donât know,â you say honestly. âMaybe. Itâs a bit early for that yet. We've not even had sexâ
Another beat of silence. Then Olga nods, just once, like sheâs filing it away somewhere.
You sit there, confused, the tension still knotted in your chest, but she doesnât push. Doesnât snap, just sips from her mug and opens her inbox like this conversation never happened and somehow⊠that quiet is the most painful sound of all.
The silence between you stretches thin but neither of you moves.
You pretend to work, Olga pretends not to notice your shaking hands. Then she speaks, her voice soft. Measured. âI spoke to Alexiaâs mami.â
You freeze, your cursor blinks on the screen, forgotten.
You turn slowly, but sheâs not looking at you. Her eyes are locked on the mug in her hands, fingers curling tight around the ceramic like she needs to anchor herself to something.
Your voice barely makes it out. âYou did?â
She nods once. âYeah.â
You wait. The silence stretches again, heavy with everything she hasnât said yet. âI showed her the photo,â Olga continues, still soft. âThe one you had. She went pale. I didnât even have to ask anything. I knew just by her reaction to the photo.â
A breath shudders out of you. âI didnât know,â you whisper. âOlga, I swear to youââ
âI know,â she cuts in.
Your eyes snap to hers, she's finally looking at you and in that look is a whole storm grief, disbelief, pain, exhaustion.
âYou were just a baby,â she says quietly. âLeft with a photo and nothing else.â
You blink back fresh tears. âThen itâs true.â
Olga nods, slowly. âThey gave you up, because of your heart, because they couldnât afford the care you needed. Yourââ She pauses, breath catching. ââyour father⊠he knew. He died when Alexia and Alba were teenagers.â
You cover your mouth with your hand, the ache in your chest pulsing to life again.
âThey loved you,â Olga says. âYou were their baby. I saw the pictures. The scans. A card with your footprints. They held you. Smiled with you.â She swallows hard, and now itâs her turn to look away. âBut they left the hospital without you because they thought that would give you the best chance in life.â
The room is still. The weight of twenty-five years settling over your shoulders like fog.
You whisper, âWhat was my name?â
Olgaâs voice trembles. âThey didn't get to name you.â
You close your eyes, it doesnât feel real and yet it explains everything.
Olga stands. You watch her cross the room slowly, quietly, something reverent in the way she moves as if sheâs carrying something sacred and she is.
She reaches into her bag, then gently places the photo frame down on your desk in front of you. The same one that had once been your only clue to anything real. It feels heavier now.
âThey know,â she says, barely above a whisper. âAlexia. Alba.â
You stare at the photo. Two little girls. You touch the glass. Your fingers donât shake this time, but your breath catches.
âI didnât want to say anything until I was sure,â Olga continues. âUntil I had the truth.â
âAnd now they know.â You say it aloud. Like youâre testing it. Like it might disappear.
Olga nods.
âThey didnât before?â you ask.
She shakes her head slowly. âThey had no idea. Eli kept it from them all this time.â
You stare at her. âWhat did they say?â
Her lips press together for a moment. âAlba was⊠broken. She didnât believe it at first, then she just went quiet, typically her.â
Your chest tightens.
âAnd AlexiaâŠâ Olgaâs voice trails off, her gaze dropping. âShe was angry. Confused. At Eli. At me.â
You wince. âAt you?â
Olga meets your eyes. âShe didnât understand why I didnât tell her soon as I found the picture. Why I didnât come to her the second I suspected.â
You nod slowly, taking that in.
âI told her I needed to be sure,â Olga says softly. âI owed that to everyone.â
Something cracks in your chest at that. You look down at the photo again, then whisper, âDo they⊠want to see me?â
Thereâs a pause and then âYes,â Olga says. âThey do.â
You look up at her. You nod, blinking fast. You stare down at the photo. Your throat tightens as you try to find the words that donât sound like a betrayal of how much this means, how much it changes. You swallow hard, your voice barely there. âI need time.â
Olga doesnât speak, so you glance up half-expecting disappointment, or worse, pity, but thereâs none, she just nods. âOf course,â she says gently.
âI justâŠâ you start, then stop. Try again. âItâs a lot. Iâm still trying to believe itâs real.â
Her eyes soften, her shoulders releasing tension you didnât realise sheâd been holding. âYou donât owe anyone speed,â she says, and again, that name hits different. Warmer now. Anchoring.
You nod slowly.
Olga walks back to her desk, sits quietly, like sheâs giving you both physical and emotional space. No pushing. No pressure.
Just⊠waiting.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
Patriâs apartment smells faintly of rosemary and whatever candle she always has burning. Itâs quiet except for the soft sound of her socks on the wood floors and the occasional clink of mugs as she makes tea without asking like she already knows you wonât have the appetite for anything more.
Youâre curled on her couch, legs pulled to your chest, the familiar soft throw blanket wrapped tight around you. The photoâs not in your bag anymore, but it may as well be itâs burned into your thoughts.
Patri walks over, hands you a mug you barely manage to hold, then settles beside you without touching close enough to feel, but not crowding.
You stare down at the tea. âI have family.â
The words barely leave your mouth. They feel surreal still, like youâre saying them for someone else. Patri doesnât speak. She waits.
You exhale shakily. âPeople Iâm related to. By blood. Iâve never had that before, never even let myself imagine what it could be like.â
She glances at you, softly, kindly.
You keep going, voice fragile. âThey want to meet me. Alexia. Alba. My sisters.â You taste the word, and it stings and warms at the same time. âBut I donât know if I can do it.â
Patri tilts her head. âWhy?â
You blink hard. âBecause Iâm not who they think they lost. I grew up different to them. I have⊠pieces, but they donât fit right. What if Iâm a disappointment? What if they only want who I couldâve been, not who I actually am?â
The tears come quick this time. Quiet and raw.
âI donât know how to be someoneâs sister. I donât even know how to be someoneâs daughter.â
Patri shifts closer, gently, until your knee brushes hers. She doesn't reach for your hand just gives you space to fall apart without pressure.
When you finally look up at her, eyes glassy, voice cracking, you whisper, âWhat if I ruin it just by showing up?â
She leans forward then, soft but certain. âBaby,â she says slow, âYou ruin nothing by existing. If anything, youâre the one thing that might put something broken back together.â
You donât reply, but you lean against her, and when she wraps her arms around you, you let yourself fall into the quiet. Not healed. Not ready, but no longer alone.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The bedroom is dim, lit only by the soft glow of the city outside filtering through sheer curtains. Alexia is already in bed, lying on her side, scrolling idly through her phone. Her hairâs a little damp from the shower, and the covers are pulled up around her shoulders like sheâs cocooning herself from the day.
Olga steps in quietly, brushing her teeth finished, sleep tugging at her limbs but her thoughts too loud for rest.
She climbs into bed slowly, careful not to disturb the peace too much.
Olga hesitates, settles on her side to face her, elbow bent, cheek resting against her hand. âI need to tell you something,â she says softly. "It's been eating me all day and I just need to off load it to someone"
Alexiaâs eyes flick up from her phone. âWhatâs wrong?â
âNothingâs wrong,â Olga assures quickly. âJust⊠weird and you have to promise not to freak out.â
Alexia raises a brow. âThatâs never a comforting preface.â
Olga gives her a tired, warning look. âIâm serious. No confronting anyone. No speeches. Just⊠listen.â
Alexia sets her phone down. She shifts onto her back, sighs dramatically. âFine. I solemnly swear. Go.â
Olga stares at the ceiling for a second. Then âMy assistant, the one you met at the office⊠sheâs the girl Patriâs been seeing.â
Alexia blinks. âWait. What?â
âShh,â Olga hushes quickly, placing a hand gently on Alexiaâs arm. âYou promised. No freaking out.â
Alexia sits up a little against the headboard, clearly working through it. âWait. Your assistant is Patriâs girl? She's the one who everyoneâs been speculating about in the locker room for weeks?â
Olga nods slowly. âYeah. I saw them this morning. Having breakfast together. Just⊠looked like a date.â
Alexia stares at her, mouth open slightly. âAnd youâre just telling me this now?â
Olga shrugs. âI didnât know until today. I wasnât spying. I was just... walking. Processing.â
Alexia laughs once, disbelieving. âDios. Patri and your assistant. Thatâs⊠wow.â She pauses. Then narrows her eyes. âIs she even Patriâs type?â
Olga gives her a flat look. âYouâve met her once, and all you said was she seemed âtoo polite.ââ
Alexia shrugs, but sheâs smiling now. âPolite and dating Patri? That girl must have hidden layers.â
Olga hums. She rests her head on Alexiaâs shoulder, a little quieter again.
After a beat, Alexia asks, âIs that all? Or is there a reason you brought it up now?â
Olga closes her eyes. âThereâs more to it⊠just not for tonight.â
Alexia tilts her head, trying to read her. âOkayâŠâ
Olga squeezes her hand gently. âJust donât mention anything at training. Let Patri have her privacy.â
Alexia rolls her eyes. âYou act like Iâm the drama.â
Olga just smiles, eyes still closed. âYouâre the captain and the drama.â
Alexia laughs softly and presses a kiss to Olgaâs forehead. âFine. Iâll behave.â
But even as they settle into silence, you linger in Alexiaâs thoughts just a little longer than before.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
Youâre mid-call, headset on, trying to sound confident while walking a particularly demanding client through a social rollout calendar. Your laptop is open, filled with colour-coded chaos, and youâre scribbling notes on a pad beside you.
Patri is lounging, because thatâs the only word for it, in the visitorâs chair next to your desk. Sheâs got one ankle lazily hooked over her knee, phone in hand, sunglasses perched on her nose even though youâre indoors. She hasnât said a word in ten minutes, just keeping you company like some smirking silent bodyguard.
You flick your eyes toward her for a second and she just wiggles her eyebrows. You try not to laugh but the door clicks open.
Olga strides in, crisp and purposeful, folders tucked under her arm and a cappuccino in hand. She looks up, clearly expecting her usual quiet workspace and then spots Patri.
She stops Patri glances up from her phone, sees her, and grins âHola, jefa.â
Olga narrows her eyes. âPatri.â
You freeze mid-sentence on your call. ââYes, weâll have the draft by Friday, absolutely. Thank you, Iâll follow up with the design team. Okay. Bye now.â
You click off and rip off the headset, slowly swivelling toward Olga
Patri shrugs, completely unbothered. âHad the morning off. Thought Iâd escort your best employee through their incredibly stressful workday.â
Olga glances at you, unamused. âIs that true?â
You give her a tight, sheepish smile. âI didnât know she was coming.â
Patri snorts, Olga sets her folders down on her desk, sipping her coffee. âWell, now that youâre here, maybe youâd like to help sort through thirty Instagram DMs from a dog food sponsor who doesnât understand what a brand kit is.â
Patri puts a hand to her heart, mock-wounded. âThat sounds horrifying.â
Olga deadpans, âWelcome to my life.â
You try not to smile but fail miserably, and Olga catches it her expression softening just for a second.
âFifteen more minutes,â she says to Patri. âThen sheâs mine again.â
Patri gives you a wink. âIâll take what I can get.â
Olga rolls her eyes and turns back to her desk, but not before you catch the tiniest smirk twitch at the corner of her mouth.
The office quiets again after Patri leaves she kisses your temple before she goes, murmuring something only for you, and you hold onto the warmth of it like a tether. But it fades fast once the door closes behind her.
Olga doesnât look at you right away. Sheâs working or pretending to. You sit for a while. Typing. Staring. Breathing. Trying to decide if the knot in your chest will ever untangle itself.
You think about the photo. About the scans in the box. About Eliâs face when she realised who you were. About Olga saying your sisters know now. That they want to meet you.
You think about what you said to Patri and then, softly, âOlga?â
She looks up immediately, her eyes are calm, steady gentle in the way only someone whoâs known heartbreak can manage.
You clear your throat. Your hands tremble a little in your lap. âI thinkâŠâ You hesitate, then push through. âI want to meet them.â
Olga doesn't move for a second. Then she slowly exhales, and something loosens in her shoulders. Not relief something quieter. Respect, maybe. Care. âOkay,â she says, her voice low, warm. âIâll let them know.â
You nod, once. It still scares you. Youâre still not sure who youâll be to them or who theyâll be to you. Sisters. Strangers. Something in between, but youâre ready to try and maybe, for now, thatâs enough.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The home Olga and Alexia share is quiet and vast, tucked away, the kind of place with balconies full of trailing plants and old tiled floors. Olga brings you up the driveway, but she doesnât say much. Just walks beside you, shoulder brushing yours once or twice, letting the silence be whatever you need it to be.
You stop in front of the door, your hands are cold, you didnât realise you were shaking until you saw the key tremble in Olgaâs hand. She glances at you. âTheyâre all here.â
You nod once. Like if you say anything, youâll turn around and run Olga squeezes your shoulder gently. Then opens the door.
The flat smells like coffee and lavender. Eliâs sitting at the dining table. She rises when she sees you, hands twitching like she wants to reach for you but she doesnât. Not yet. Behind her, Alba leans in a doorway, arms folded tight, guarded and uncertain. Her expression is blank but her eyes are anything but, and then thereâs Alexia.
Sheâs sitting on the sofa. Casual, almost too casual hoodie sleeves pushed up, hair tied back, one leg bouncing anxiously. She stands up when you come in, and for a second, nobody breathes.
This is it. Youâve imagined this moment so many times and never, not once, like this.
Alexia speaks first. âHi.â Just that. One syllable, but her voice is soft.
You nod. âHi.â
Olga touches your back gently, guiding you toward the sofa. You perch on the edge, knees close together, hands tight in your lap.
Alba stays back.
Alesia sits back down and studies you like sheâs trying to make sense of whatâs right in front of her and still canât believe it. âI didnât know,â she says. âUntil last week, I didnât know.â
âI didnât either,â you whisper.
You look at her really look at her. Sheâs familiar in ways that donât make sense. The shape of her nose. The arch of her brow. The curve of her mouth when she frowns like yours in the mirror.
Eli clears her throat. âThis is yours,â she says quietly, and sets the shoebox down on the table in front of you.
You donât open it yet. Youâre too afraid of what it is will make real, and you really didn't want to cry in front of these people.
Instead, you look at Alexia again and then to Alba, whose jaw is clenched, whose arms are still crossed like armour.
âIâm not here to take anything,â you say, your voice shaking. âIâm not trying to force myself into your lives. I donât even know how to do this. I just⊠I wanted to meet you.â
Alba looks away, Alexia doesnât, she leans forward and when she speaks again, itâs quieter. âI donât know how to do this either,â she says. âBut I want to try.â
Your breath hitches. You nod. Once and when she reaches out, you let her take your hand and time passes in silence, Olga offers you a drink, and the only noise is clanking of glasses in the kitchen,
Alexia hasnât let go of your hand even when Olga puts your drink on the coffee table in front of you.
It rests between hers, light but sure, a quiet anchor as you sit across from her on the low coffee table. She doesnât look like a football legend right now. She looks like someone trying not to break apart a thousand different ways.
Olga sits beside you right beside you. So close her thigh presses against yours, one of her hands resting on your back as if sheâs afraid you might suddenly vanish.
You feel both of them, like weights you can lean on. Eli sits a few feet away, silent, hands clasped in her lap. Her eyes are rimmed with red, lips pressed in a line. Alba leans against the far wall, arms still crossed, distant but listening.
The shoebox sits unopened on the table. Alexia breaks the silence first.
âSoâŠâ she starts, glancing between you and Olga, âYou work for my girlfriend. Thatâs wild.â
You blink, a little startled by the shift but youâre grateful for comfortable small talk. Itâs a rope thrown into the storm. You nod. âYeah. Almost three months now.â
Olga leans in just enough for her temple to graze your shoulder. âSheâs brilliant,â she murmurs. âTakes her job too seriously, though.â
You roll your eyes, a small smile tugging at your lips despite everything. âSays the woman who once scheduled tweets from the bathtub.â
Alexia barks a laugh genuine, caught off guard. âShe would.â
âShe did,â
"I did" you and Olga say in unison, and for a beat, it feels like a normal moment between friends.
Then silence creeps in again, you fiddle with the hem of your sleeve.
âYou guys are close,â Alexia says softly, looking between you and Olga.
You nod. âSheâs been⊠I donât even know what Iâd call it. Kind. Patient. The first person who made me feel like I wasnât just⊠passing through.â
You feel Olgaâs fingers tighten briefly at your back. A silent Iâm still here. Alexiaâs expression softens. âI get that,â she murmurs.
You look at her carefully. âIs that why youâre⊠so good to Alba?â
She looks over at her little sister still silent, still watching and her whole face changes. Itâs not obvious, not loud, but itâs there the sharp tenderness, the unspoken devotion.
âSheâs mine,â Alexia says simply. âAlways has been.â
You nod slowly, your throat tightens, and suddenly you canât speak Olga shifts beside you, gently leaning into your side, just enough to steady you.
You donât say anything more, neither does Alexia, not right away, but somethingâs changing in the room. Not resolved not fixed but thawing.
Across the space, Alba watches it all with unreadable eyes and Eli quiet and still presses a hand to her mouth, as if afraid her emotions might spill out and ruin this fragile moment.
You look at your sister, she smiles at you. Small. Real and you smile back.
Itâs quiet again now, not the awkward kind itâs something else. Something rawer.
You feel Olga still beside you, warm and steady. Alexia hasnât moved far either, perched on the sofa her fingers tap silently against her knee, like she wants to speak but knows this moment isnât hers.
Youâre looking at Eli. She hasnât looked at you once. Not really. Not since you walked through the door. She sits rigid in her chair, her body folded in on itself like sheâs trying to be smaller, her hands twist in her lap, restless and unanchored. Her lips are pressed together like sheâs keeping a dam sealed with sheer will.
You watch the way her thumbs rub over one another.
You do that.
You watch the way her brow creases when sheâs thinking too loud to speak.
You do that too.
It strikes you all at once not in your chest but in your gut, like something old and invisible pulling taut.
Youâre hers you always have been, your voice, when it breaks the silence, surprises even you. Soft. Uncertain.
âYou look like you need a hug.â
Her head lifts, slowly, slowly, she meets your eyes.
Everything in her face is shaking. Guilt. Hope. Fear. Regret. Love, too but buried beneath years of silence and sorrow.
Her mouth parts, but no words come out, the others donât move. Not Alba. Not Alexia. Not even Olga.
You donât push her, you just let the words sit in the space between you Eli swallows. Her eyes fill before a single tear escapes. Her hands go still and then quietly, brokenly âI doâ
You stand placing your bag down, she seems surprised by your action but she stands and when you take steps forward she meets you halfway.
She hugs you like sheâs terrified youâll disappear again, her arms wrap around you, trembling, and your face presses into her shoulder. You breathe her in lavender and something warm beneath it. Something familiar you didnât even know you missed.
Her whole body shudders as she quietly cries, you donât say anything, you just hold her back, you donât know what youâre forgiving. There was nothing to forgive for you, you donât know what still needs to be mended, but in this moment, youâre not lost. Youâre held.
The security buzzer goes, you swallow as you and Eli pull away at the same time, "I'll get it that, that'll be" Olga stops herself she knew Patri was coming for you, but she didn't know whether you wanted everyone knowing.
You nod with a little smile, you look to Alexia, "I take it you know"
She nods, "She talks about you a lot, I just didn't know, you were, you, until yesterday"
Patriâs car pulls up as the door is opened just as the sky softens into twilight you stand near the door, jacket pulled around your shoulders, feeling the air shift as the visit comes to a close.
Olga helps you gather your things gentle, wordless, still keeping close like sheâs afraid too much space might crack something in you. Alexia lingers near Patri's car they have a quiet conversation you don't catch, her arms folded but her expression soft, uncertain when it turns back to you. Alba follows behind at a distance, watching still wary, still processing, but here that was something.
Eli hasnât said much since the hug. Sheâs been quieter than ever, her movements slowed like the emotion has worn her thin, but sheâs remained close, watching you with eyes too full for casual conversation.
You hold the letter in your hand for a long time before you finally turn to her.
Itâs folded neatly. Ink smudged in one corner from where your hand trembled. You hadnât planned to give it to her but there were too many things you couldnât get out in front of everyone. Things too complicated. Too raw. And you wrote it for that circumstance.
You step closer. Offer it with both hands. She looks down at the paper like it might burn her fingers.
You speak quietly, for her only. âI didnât know how to say it all. So I wrote it instead.â
Eliâs hand reaches out slowly, like sheâs afraid if she moves too fast youâll vanish again. She takes the letter her fingers press around it like itâs fragile like you are.
She nods, eyes shining, lips parting but she doesnât speak. Just holds it close to her chest.
"Ready to go babe?" Patri smiles, "Pina and her sister are already there"
You nod and turn, your eyes meet Alexiaâs, she gives you the faintest smile, then steps aside to let you go. Olga brushes her hand over your back as you move past her, a silent Iâm proud of yo and as you walk around Patri's car to get in, Alba finally looks up.
She doesnât say anything but for the first time, she doesnât look away.
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The front door clicked shut behind you, and with it goes the last of the tension you carried into this house hours ago. The echo of your presence lingers in the room, the kind that doesnât fade easily. The kind that changes things.
Eli stands where you left her, still holding the letter like itâs made of glass.
Her eyes donât lift from it Alexia gently steps toward her. âMami?" but Eli barely hears. Her lips move, soundless.
âI canât,â she whispers finally. âI canât read it. I donât know if I can take what it says.â
Olga watches her closely, her fingers curled around the hem of her jumper, but she doesnât interrupt. Sheâs already said what she needed to say today.
Alba, who hasnât said a word in what feels like forever, finally pushes off the arm of the couch. Her voice is soft, a little raspy.
âDo you want me to read it to you?â
Eli looks up, startled, Alba doesnât smile. Doesnât flinch. She just holds out her hand. Eli hesitates for a moment, eyes searching her daughterâs face. And then, wordlessly, she presses the letter into her youngestâs palm.
Alba walks to the center of the room and sits down on the couch, tucking one leg beneath her. She opens the paper carefully, smoothing the creases with tender fingers.
She clears her throat as everyone takes a seat and begins.
I don't even know where to start with this I feel for years of my life I always wanted this moment, the opportunity to have my say, so this probably won't flow or make much sense but I'm going to vulnerably honest and true to myself.
I never blamed you, growing up I never resented you, disliked you, or hated you for the decision you made. I would always wonder what I did wrong. Why I wasn't good enough. The reason you couldn't keep me and love me like parents should, I was always focused on me and my short comings, I never spoke or thought negatively for the decision you made.
I saw everyday the pain giving a child up caused, I heard my carers talk of the despair and sheer pain they would witness when children were removed from the care of their parents. I would hope you didn't ever have to feel that because it wasn't a choice you had made but I understand the gravity of the decision that was made to leave me at the hospital for you and your husband.
I obviously now know the reason for your decision, and I think it's important for you to know, I did get that help I needed and that you may be interested in the journey that took. I had five surgeries before my second birthday, to try and mend the heart I have, I spent the first three years of my life living in the hospital you left me at, before I was discharged to my first foster family but I had very complex medical needs and they couldn't deal with that so I was moved on. I moved I think 5 times before I was 10 and deemed fit enough to live in a communal home where I stayed until I was 12 but then I needed to move again due to my age to what they call a half way house until I was 18.
Tangent lol, back to the heart, its never going to be a fully working healthy heart, I can't eat certain foods I can't have certain drinks and I work everyday to just be the healthiest I can be to give my heart the best chance of being able to sustain me and make the need for a transplant stayed off for as long as possible. That's a case of when and not if.
Olga explained to me of the passing of your husband, I am truly sorry for you Alexia and Alba's loss, I couldn't begin to imagine the pain it caused to loose such a big part of your lives.
I'm not here to ask anything from any of you, I don't know what any of us want from what we've learned, or what any of us expect to happen.
I just hope that this doesn't affect the relationship you have with your daughters because even before I learned what I know now, from the stories I heard from Olga you sounded like such a warm loving tight nit family. It may not be my place to say but I hope it doesn't change what they think and see of you, you are still the mother they know and love that hasn't changed because they learned of me. You are still that same person, and if anything it just shows what strength you have to make the hardest decision a parent can make along with your husband and carry on and raise two amazing people.
I hope you can begin to heal and most of all forgive yourself for the decision you made all those years ago.
You made the right decision, for me and for your family.
I wouldn't be here today without the decision and sacrifice you made so,
Thank You
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Youâre not expecting her.
The quiet of the office is a comfort today, Olgaâs out in meetings, the afternoon sun is casting soft shadows across your desk, and the rhythm of your tasks is keeping your mind anchored. Or at leas distracted.
Then the bell above the door chimes, you glance up.
Alba lingers awkwardly by the entrance, her eyes scanning the space like she might still change her mind. Sheâs dressed simply jeans, oversized tee, hair up in a messy knot and something about her posture makes her look younger than she is. Vulnerable.
You stand slowly, heart thudding. âHeyâŠâ
Alba walks in a few paces, stopping near the front counter. Her hands are shoved deep in her pockets. âI know Olgaâs not here,â she says quickly, like a disclaimer. âI waited. I didnât want to⊠ambush or anything.â
You nod, unsure what to say yet. Sheâs clearly nervous, more than you thought she would be from the stories you'd heard of her from Olga.
âI justâŠâ She exhales through her nose, avoiding your eyes. âI wanted to talk. To you. If thatâs okay.â
You gesture gently toward the small seating area. âOf course.â
You both sit, but she perches on the edge of the chair, like sheâs ready to bolt. She doesnât look at you, not directly, but her voice is soft and unfiltered. âI donât know how to do this,â she admits. âIâve been all messed up since we found out. Itâs like everything I ever knew just cracked and now I keep wondering what it means. For me. For us.â
You nod, letting her speak without interruption.
âI guess I justâŠâ She finally glances at you. Her eyes are rimmed red. âI want to get to know you, because out of anyone it's really not your fault, but I donât know where to start.â
Your voice is quiet but steady. âMaybe we donât have to know. Maybe we just try.â Alba blinks. You smile, just a little. âWe could⊠start with dinner? No pressure. No heavy talks unless you want to. Just two people who might be something to each other, seeing what that feels like.â
Alba gives the tiniest laugh, almost a scoff at herself. âI havenât felt this nervous about dinner since my first crush in high school.â
You grin. âShould I be flattered or terrified?â
She laughs again, fuller this time. âMaybe both.â
You reach for your notebook, tearing off a corner and scribbling. You hand it to her a small list of places you can eat in the city and your phone number"
âPick one. You text me when you're ready. No pressure. Just⊠dinner.â
Alba looks at the paper in her hands like itâs more than just ink and names. She nods slowly. âOkay,â she says, quieter now. âOkay.â She stands after a moment, lingers at the door again like sheâs debating something. Then she turns back. âThank you. For not making it harder.â
You offer her a warm, careful smile. âWeâve both had hard. Iâd rather try something else.â
She nods and then sheâs gone.
đ§âđ§âđ§âđ§
The restaurant is quiet and tucked away one of those cozy little places with exposed brick, warm lighting, and waitstaff that treat you like family. Youâre early. Youâd rather wait than arrive to faces youâre not quite sure how to greet yet, but you donât wait long.
Alba arrives first.
She spots you at the table and offers a small, shy smile as she slides into the seat across from you. Sheâs dressed casually, but there's something softer in her eyes than the last time less guarded.
Youâre about to say something when you hear a familiar voice at the hostess stand. âAlba!â
Alexia. Your heart stutters. You werenât expecting her. Alba glances at you, a half-smile creeping in. âI may have⊠invited someone.â
Alexia arrives at the table with a warm grin and no hesitation at all as she kisses both your cheeks like sheâs always done it. âHi,â she says, taking the seat beside you. âI figured, three sisters is better than two, no?â
Itâs strange how easy the word sisters rolls out of her mouth. You blink at her, then at Alba, then you smile. âYeah. I guess it is.â
The conversation starts simple, menus, drinks, Alexia teasing Alba about how she always orders the same pasta everywhere she goes. You laugh when Alexia makes a terrible pun in Spanish that Alba groans at. Youâre hesitant at first, still watching the way they interact like a spectator, until Alba nudges your arm and mimics your confused face when you try to translate the joke. You burst out laughing.
It surprises even you.
A bottle of wine appears. Glasses are poured. Somewhere between the bread basket and the main course, something shifts. Itâs light, natural, unforced.
You find yourself talking, not deeply, not yet, but honestly. Sharing silly work stories, how you met Patriâ
âOkay, wait,â Alba cuts in, grinning now, fork paused mid-air. âYouâre the secret girl Patriâs been sneaking around with all this time?â
Your face heats instantly. âIt wasnât sneaking,â you say through a laugh. âShe just wasn't exactly wanting it announcing it to the locker room.â
Alexia shakes her head, amused. âPatri is awful at subtle. She was glowing at training after she met you. G-L-O-W-I-N-G.â
You laugh, covering your face for a second. âOh god.â
Alba leans in slightly, her tone playful but with an edge of sincerity. âJust so you know⊠if she hurts you, Iâll kick her ass.â
You snort into your wine.
Alexia raises a brow. âAlba, Patri is my teammate.â
Alba shrugs, utterly unbothered. âDonât care. I like her, but blood is blood.â
Youâre laughing now, genuinely, shaking your head. âIâll be sure to tell her sheâs been warned.â
Alba points at you with her fork. âDo that. I want her scared.â
Alexia mutters something about drama queen, and Alba throws a breadstick at her. It misses, barely.
Youâre still smiling, Alba leans back in her seat, glass in hand, her grin a little wicked.
âSoâŠâ she begins slowly, eyeing you over the rim of her glass, âhowâs the sex with Patri?â
Alexia nearly chokes on her wine.
You blink, stunned, heat rushing to your cheeks. âAlba!â
âWhat?â she laughs. âIâm curious!â
Alexia looks horrified. âYou canât ask her that!â
âI just did,â Alba smirks.
Youâre giggling now, one hand covering your face as you try to recover. âGod, okay, um⊠we havenât⊠actually done that yet.â
Albaâs face flickers with surprise. âReally?â
You nod, a little shy but honest. âYeah. Sheâs been⊠really respectful. Which is kind of adorable.â
Alexia leans back, visibly relaxing. âThatâs sweet. Patriâs always been a softie underneath the sarcasm.â
You bite your lip, then laugh quietly. âIt is sweet. But sometimes I just⊠want to be disrespected, you know?â
Thereâs a moment of silence, Alexiaâs eyes go wide, Alba hollers with laughter and you shrink back slightly, eyes darting between them realising who they are to you as your face burns. âOh my God wait. I canât talk like that in front of you, can I?â
Alexia makes a strangled noise, waving her hand like she needs to shut her ears. âNo. You absolutely cannot. Your my baby sisterâ
Alba wipes a tear from her eye. âToo late.â
You all dissolve into laughter, the kind that makes your ribs hurt. The kind that breaks through walls you didnât even realise were still up. You glance at them Alexia still slightly horrified, Alba grinning like she won the lottery.
Alexia rests her chin in her hand, watching the two of you with a soft, content look on her face. âYou know,â she says, her voice quieter now, âI really didnât know what to expect when I found out. I was angry. Hurt. But right now?â She looks between you both. âThis feels right.â
You meet her gaze. âIt does.â
Albaâs smile isnât wide, but itâs real. Thereâs still so much to say, still so much to feel, still so much to learn, but for now, thereâs wine, warmth, and the first real night where you donât feel like a stranger.