my deeply personal, serious ARFID post is sandwiched between perfect preparation arc posts and I feel that sums me up as a person
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@wordsfalloutmymouth
my deeply personal, serious ARFID post is sandwiched between perfect preparation arc posts and I feel that sums me up as a person

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poll
can a smell have speckles. in the most literal sense possible
yes
yes (has this synesthesia)
no
what the fuck are you talking about
synesthesia rambles under the cut
i know I got sound spatial synesthesia (associating sound with a location/movement) and I kind of lump what is probably sound-texture with it. Which I probably should start differentiating more because if I talk with others who have sound spatial they don't talk about textures much. I was just lazy to get another label lol
mirror speech im pretty confident in being right in. But it's been fainter recently
What's interesting is that I think the textures I experience with music, I also get for emotions/pain. Been noticing it more recently because of migraine related brain fog, but it feels like a texture to me, as do other emotions. just as impossible to describe as the textures of sound though, which is annoying
i also think I got the textures and spatial locations for smells? this one im the least sure about tbh. It doesn't vary based on smell much, I just get this sensation of weight and a physical presence
But I find it interesting how all my probable types/known types of synesthesia are linked. Like I knew this and have seen it in others but it's more fun to see it in myself
it would also explain why it's hard for me to describe pain and feelings. besides the obvious autism. though the correlation between autism and synesthesia is crazy already so whatever
gonna consult some synesthesia friends about this but wanted to ramble it out on my own first. Since I've been thinking a lot without reaching any conclusion or serious consideration
who else thinks primarily in concepts and not words or pictures or anything

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my sister has the qifrey being a tree and memory wiping spoiled but not WHY or that ollrugio ASKED qifrey to do and that this is to keep qifrey from not being a tree. So she's pissed at him and her theory is that qifrey wants to deal with "the tree condition" himself and not get help. and I'm like "hmm guess you'll find out. haha doomed yaoi" (clawing at the floor this is evil)
she STILL hasn't gotten through it yet (I think she's read to them entering the great hall and not much else) and I made a comment that olruggio is my favorite adult but I also gotta kill him and she says "oh well I'm sure it's not as bad as anything qifreys done"
Let me tell you, that got the worst expression out of my expressionless ass. like I was fighting to not make a face because ohhhhh boy she's not ready. get on with it or I'm gonna start yapping about spoilers. gonna grab a random chapter and not shut the fuck up
Sometime, somewhere
I learned in my political science class that all major famines in the 20th century and onward have been caused by oppressive groups or political situations restricting access to food, NOT natural causes like crop failure
This is literally the point that Indian economist Amartya Sen made that won him the Nobel prize in economics. As a child, he survived one of the several Bengal famines that were organised by the British colonisers in India. He developed his theory on famines, which is that they were more about distribution of food rather than production or availability of it
I'm not fully sold on this theory myself, but interesting thought experiment, hear me out: The pact between Olruggio and Qifrey as a parallel to The Pact of conspiracy to hide magic from non-witches.
Not as a 1:1 analogy, because that would imply a level of trust and benevolent intentions that the knight's moralis & pointed caps absolutely don't have with outsiders.
But the parallels are there: The removal of memories to prevent forbidden magic, to prevent a secret coming to light with potentially destructive and deadly consequences.
And these parallels do make me wonder about the pointed Cap Conspiracy Pact: A pact implies at least two parties: The pointed caps and who? The royals? We know that the healing witches fought against the pact, but what if there was a party or group that gave up knowledge of magic willingly? I think it would be interesting to see a parallel to olruggio giving up his memory of the silverwood voluntarily to protect someone else.
Or is the pact between the original three sages among themselves? The current three sages seem to know something the other's don't - and the ominous comments about cold winds and "preserving magic" imply a hidden threat.
Like the entire story and our main characters are rightfully critical towards pointed cap society, and I agree with those sentiments.
But it would add an interesting layer of nuance if it turned out that The Pact was actually protecting the continet from something worse than "people could potentially misuse magic for war"

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Somthing that I think is honestly really funny , is how the brim cap SOLD the book to Coco.
Like not only was he setting this kid up for the horrors , but he also took her fucking money ???
Like Why ?????
Flew into a blind rage and made this after reading this post.
I’m dead 💀
I made a pocket-sized Tartah crochet with removable hat
Hat detail and I hid the magnets under his spiky hair
He floats
“the intrusive thoughts won” “that’s psychotic” “i’m so delusional haha” “narcissistic abuse” “the weather is so bipolar” SHUT UP!!!!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!
attempted to use curl products and my sister predicted exactly how my hair would turn out. fml bro this is embarrassing
also. I do hate how much curly hair routines are tied to gender. "Curly hair girl" is a Thing now and even if we're ignoring trans and gnc people, there's men with curly hair too. they deserve to care for their hair properly too.
But it just sucks because I'm trying to finally take care of my hair and part of the reason I procrastinated so long is being slammed into my face at every turn

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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attempted to use curl products and my sister predicted exactly how my hair would turn out. fml bro this is embarrassing
some old csm childhood au doodles!