Words by Andy.

September 1st, 2017:

July 24th, 2017:

July 11th, 2017:

July 10th, 2017:

J.I.D, The Never Story (2017) Best Tracks: “Never,” “Lauder,” “D/Vision” Weakest Track: “Hoodbooger” Rating: 7.4/10

I quit my adult job today. I’m going to road trip across the country. I don’t know what I’m trying to find, or even yet, where I’m trying to find it. It may already be here or within myself (as I’m sure I’ll eventually realize) but I want to live out the young adult cliche and find that out the hard way. I want to experience shit and actually experience it, not just stumble on an internet tab of it. The apocalypse is near and the burning flesh of reason is in the air. Fuck it, why not.

July 6th, 2017:

June 30th, 2017:

Jay Z, 4:44 (2017) Best Tracks: “The Story of O.J.,” “Legacy,” “Smile” Weakest Track: “Kill Jay Z” Rating: 8.8/10

I’ll be honest: when I heard that Jay Z was possibly putting out an album a month ago, I didn’t care. When I heard that Jay Z was definitely putting out an album a few weeks ago, I didn’t care. When the minutes trickled after learning that the album had actually gone live, I still didn’t care. It’s just how I felt. Kingdom Come jaded me, Blueprint 3 hurt me and Magna Carta tarnished my ability to ever trust again.

Yet, we live in an age where opinions fly as fast as the wireless connectivity that transmit them, and as many with connection to the human race quickly heard, the word had come in: J-Hova was back.

So I listened. And listened. And listened more. This process reoccurred not continually through the whole album, but through every single song. It was like watching a movie and re-watching it just to realize how much shit you missed, and there was plenty. The wisdom, the wordplay, the ripe vulnerability and the punchlines to match — they were peak Jay, albeit in an entirely new form. The legend was not just back, but powerful enough to make you forget that JT is probably still out there somewhere adorned in his Barney’s suit and tie.

So, to commemorate this grand moment in rap music, I can only do one of the things rap fans loved to do the most before RapGenius made it all too simple: decode the fuck out of fire ass bars. And so we begin.

– – –

“Y’all on the ‘Gram, holdin’ money to your ear. There’s a disconnect, we don’t call that money over here.” – “The Story of O.J.”

Let’s begin with what is arguably one of the most iconic bars rapped since SahBabii famously pondered the health-conscious, “How you suck dick, but don’t eat string beans?” At first glance, the lyric seems simple enough. Compared to Jay Z’s wealth, your Instagram photo of you purposefully gazing at the floor like a thot with a stacked bundle to your ear is pitiful. Not only does Jay not admire it, he also refuses to call your wrinkled paper money. He’s rich, you’re on Instagram. Point taken. cNow, let’s look into the actual pose described itself. Why is the unnamed flexer holding the cash stack to his ear? Well, because as the age old proverb goes, you got to pick up when the money is calling. Maybe for fear the money’s service will be busy later? Who knows. Nonetheless, herein is where Jay Z makes his message clear, primarily by going full “hold up, I’m about to enter a tunnel, my reception is really bad” levels of I can’t hear you. There’s a disconnect, both financially and in terms of hypothetical cell phone reception. At this point, Jay is so far into the tunnel of real wealth, he is now unavailable to literally call that money. Let it be known that vain cash bundles hold no place in Jay Z’s metaphorical contact list. 

“Drug dealers and abusers, America likes me ruthless. My therapist said I relapsed, I said, “Prehaps I Freudian slipped in European whips.” God sent me to break the chain.” – “Smile”

With all honesty, these might be my favorite lines of the whole album. There’s so much to unravel here yet the message is so clear, which is Hov’s M.O. to a T. In these lines, Jay counters his portrayal in the white media as a criminal by reaffirming the reality that he’s earned his overwhelming success through music and a tight business acumen, and all with instinctive ease, or as he refers to it, “Freudian slips,” a term coined by famed psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud describing moments or words spoken by accident that reflect ones subconscious desire. Creating classic albums, founding and running a major label, landing Beyonce, developing an entertainment conglomerate, creating an artist-friendly streaming service, landing Beyonce — all these came to Jay intuitively from his desire to succeed, along with his desire to break apart the chains of structural racism (as represented by European whips) and the obstacles he endured. And he made it all look easy. You see that? That’s god-level poetry.

“Slappin’ out of the toy, the separation is clear. In my rear-view mirror, objects is further than they appear. Oh yeah, I was born with a pair, Playin’ for high stakes. Norman caked, he looked up and out of the Lear.” – “Smile”

There’s two very important innuendos to break down here. cTo begin, we have to call back to Drake’s 2016 dud Views and pick apart a small shot tucked in “Weston Road Flows,” a couplet that reaches with the sentiment: “You number one and I’m Eddie Murphy, we tradin’ places / Look in the mirror, I’m closer than I really appear.” With a track-record for subliminally calling out Jay (debatably the greatest of all time), there’s no confusion as to who that line was for. So, Jay being Jay, clears up the misinformation with two simple retorts: 1) the separation is VERY clear and 2) you’re still far as shit. In this way, not only does Hov want Drake to know he’s in fact not Eddie Murphy, but he wants him to know he’s probably also not Dave Chappelle, Chris Rock or even Kevin Hart. He’s Katt Williams or something, you know, somewhere in a separate caliber kickboxing children.   cAs for the second part, well this deserves recognition for being just about the most middle aged reference I’ve ever heard in a rap song, sans all the corny dad jokes Kanye’s been dropping since “so many Aunties, we should have an Aunty team.” In this impeccable confection of words, Hov lets you know he has balls, and as such, plays for high stakes. The reward? Well, he (referring to himself as ‘Norman’) made a shitload of money and is now looking out of a Lear jet — a play on the name of iconic television producer, Norman Lear, the man responsible for shows like Sanford and Son, All in the Family and practically every other ’70s sitcom you watched on Nick At Nite when you stayed up too late. It’s a punchline so deeply representative of Jay almost being 50 and old as hell, yet he flaunts it while simultaneously letting you know he’s still rich and talented. Genius.

“Marcy me, streets is my artery, The vein of my existence, I’m the Gotham City heartbeat” – “Marcy Me”

It’s no secret that Jay Z will go to any length to put on Brooklyn’s Marcy Projects. He shouts the project building out in every record, and even goes out of his way to distribute toys throughout the houses every Christmas. To Jay, the Marcy projects are what Gotham City is to Batman. In his eyes, it his duty to protect the name and legacy of the place he called home. It’s sacred to him (hence the ‘Mercy Me’ flip).

Yet, at the same time, this acknowledgement works both as a statement of intrinsic love for his old tenements and also as recognition that the Marcy houses very much so represent his darkest days. No matter if the streets flow through him like veins and arteries, as they are what gave him life, the play on vein/bane/Bane is left purposefully enough to fuel the Batman analogy. Those same buildings he knows and love were the same that gave him his first job peddling crack and acted as a backdrop for the reoccurring violence he faced growing up. Like Bane to Batman, the houses could’ve very much presented him with untimely death, as they did with timely strength.

June 29th, 2017:

June 28th, 2017:

Fred Thomas, Changer (2017) Best Tracks: “Brickwall,” “Mallwalkers,” “Oval Beach” Weakest Track: “Changer” Rating: 7.3/10

In the last moments of album opener, “Misremembered,” thirty-something year old singer/songwriter Fred Thomas exclaims, “When the controlled burn that you call your 20s is finally extinguished, you know you still need someplace to go.” Then, the track closes and the words “there was something I was trying to say” repeat in frustration until the last second.

There’s a scalding nature surrounding the perpetual uncertainty of seeing time slip. That uncertainty of wondering whether your actions are enough, or how much enough is really enough, or if -- most disheartening -- whether that “enough” even exists.

And yet, the clock still passes.

On some mornings, I may wake at, let’s say, 7:23am. It’s early and I’m comfortable with that. By 7:24, I’ll let myself know that one more minute is more than enough time to get a comfortable grip on my day. And then, at 7:25am, I’ll gaze at the clock and suddenly gain a fleeting appreciation for superstition, reminding myself that odd numbers are, in fact, actually kinda strange. At 7:30am, I’ll find my fingers contorted in 90 degree angles refreshing apps on a cracked iPhone until I eventually realize it’s been 7:34 for eight minutes now. At that stage, I’m racing against shower beams and punching pillows and blankets searching for sets of keys poached by dirty jeans hiding behind an open door. I am now late and time has entered the ether.

More often than not, I worry that, everyday, I create a reality that exists like a macrocosm of my rushed mornings. I worry that, that quiet neglect will engulf my opportunities like an avalanche of misdirected hours. I worry that one day, my years will countdown like contrite clocks gliding towards 7:34am, and after all is said and done, I’ll wake up realizing I can’t remember what I actually had to say.

June 27th, 2017:

i knew distance back when it once went by the name, "home." 

back before 

Darien Deleon (Age: 24)

June 26th, 2017:

June 22nd, 2017:

Vince Staples, Big Fish Theory (2017) Best Tracks: “Big Fish,” “Rain Come Down,” “Yeah Right” Weakest Track: “Love Can Be…” Rating: 8.4/10

June 21st, 2017:

June 19th, 2017:

2 Chainz, Pretty Girls Like Trap Music (2017) Best Tracks: “Bailan,” “Saturday Night,” “Rolls Royce Bitch” Weakest Track: “Door Swangin’” Rating: 7.5/10

Tragedy and consistency don’t coalesce in productivity under any circumstances -- or at least that’s what I’ve taken away from the past few days. Inhibited judgement leads to bad decisions, bad decisions lead to train wrecks in the form of bent hoods and broken headlights, and those, well those lead to a major shift in priority management and life direction (for the time being, I have to add honestly). I guess a wake-up call was needed, all before the sound of simple regret ultimately fizzled under court room gavels and empty pockets. I don’t condone my behavior as of late, and my 7am self and 7pm self are still perpetually at war on a day to day basis. Time heals all wounds, they say. For now, the Pharrell-produced “Bailan” definitely helps.

tired of my desires seeking nourishment after long nights out;