wingsCathiethings

Besides the deep grief and pain of loss, there’s a lot that has to happen after a loved one dies. It’s just plain rude that the world continues on as if everything is normal, when your entire life has been turned upside down. There are always the well-meaning who spout platitudes regarding your agony, although truthfully, I have been spared much of that; my friends and my church have been…

The next few days were, of course, a blur. I couldn’t believe the funeral home called me that night, but there was nothing for which to wait. Our son and I went in the next morning, Sunday, and made some arrangements: the obituary, the newspaper notices, the day for the services. So much texting, trying to accommodate various needs and wants. Hector had told people he just wanted to be cremated,…

I am glad I was there when he passed. They let us have his family and close friends come into his room. If you’ve read my other posts, you know what a hard time it was for me to get in to see him by myself. And then I had to ‘suit up,’ with gown, gloves, double mask, and more gloves. If I had wanted I could have used a hair covering as well (I didn’t). And that was after three weeks of his…

I stopped writing because I was spending so much time and effort into texting, trying to keep family and prayer warriors updated. I stopped writing because it was getting so intense: the crisis leading to the tubes in his chest, the next crisis leading to the heavy push to “pull the plug” for him. I stopped writing because I was exhausted, and ashamed to be so weak. Mentally, emotionally,…