Wilted Words

“My depression is a shape shifter; one day it is as small as a firefly in the palm of a bear, the next day, it’s the bear.”

“You were afraid of the monster in your closet, and I was afraid it had already climbed into bed with us.”

“The way cotton candy falls to its knees at the suggestion of rain is the only thing I’ve found to describe remembering, after you’ve just been happy, all the things that make you less alive.”

“The consistency of hurt is what makes it so comforting.”

“I’m so tired of talking about my depression as someone else: a ghost that haunts me and I am afraid of the seance.”

“I have clawed my way to ‘okay' and it will just have to do for now.”

“Do you ever sit on the end of your bed and listen to the world spin?”

“Someday I’m gonna have a child. She’s gonna have eyes like mine and such small hands. Just like she’ll need me alive then, she needs me alive now; I can’t say goodbye before I’ve had a chance to say hello.”

“I am learning that the difference between a garden and a graveyard is only what you choose to put in the ground.”

“The way cotton candy falls to its knees at the suggestion of rain is the only thing I’ve found to describe remembering, after you’ve just been happy, all the things that make you less alive.”

“My last birthday, I was surrounded by people who loved me, and the loudest thought in my head was still, ‘They wouldn’t even be sad if you died.‘”

“The trees teach me how to break and keep on living.”

I’ve always liked quiet people: You never know if they’re dancing in a daydream or if they’re carrying the weight of the world.

She…makes me wish I could right wrongs, instead of poems.

Because it was always safer in another’s arms than it was my own head.

Please don’t expect me to always be good and kind and loving. There are times when I will be cold and thoughtless and hard to understand.