no angel

he’s in a weird place where everything is blissful yet uncertain at the same time – with the way they were acting around each other, people would’ve assumed that they were a couple, but that was far from what they were. every time lucas tries to even ask them about it, he’d always be brushed off or it’ll somehow be a long conversation, yet, the answer was still unclear. lucas loved spending time with them and he wanted more, was he being selfish? he’s frustrated and he doesn’t know what to do – so he decided that he’d do something about it. staring at the coffee in hand, lucas pressed his lips together. “i wanna ask you something,” he exhaled, “one of my teammates decide that it’d be funny to set me up on a blind date.” lucas looked at the other, “will you be mad if i went?”

“have you ever wondered,” rian starts, spinning her pencil between her fingers. “what if santa claus actually catches and eats naughty kids instead of giving gifts to good kids?”

at the life update, miles is somewhat relieved; he still felt lousy, like he couldn’t really breathe properly. he thinks that he ever dared to cough or sneeze, his appendix might pop out of his abdomen. miles knows that really wasn’t how basic human anatomy worked, but anything could happen. truly. he’d thought he’d be able to dance through life without running into a near-death experience, but here he was. “kinda shit,” he rasps. it takes him another minute to realize that yisoo—someone he hadn’t predicted he’d ever see again—was there, peering at him. beautiful as always, his hazy mind supplies. “i’m fine. don’t worry.” at least the physical pain will pass, unlike the wound that he had inflicted on himself when he carelessly let yisoo slip away. 

‘i prefer you permit yourself to be weak than to break down because you overworked yourself entirely. however, just make sure that somebody knows and you are not alone. i am worried you may break down somewhere and nobody is there to help. you know, my situation is what it is now because my mother did not have it in herself to talk. she just swallowed, pretended and things went terribly wrong so i try to make sure you all feel comfortable but it does not have to be me. just make sure to ask for help if you need it, okay? you work hard, to admit weakness is no share.’ simo replied with the hint of a smile, it was difficult sometimes but with the years, he managed to have more faith and trust again, to be patient. 

“I’m not? That’s news to me. You laugh at my jokes, right?” he chuckled. “Right?” he asked again hesitantly now. Jules brought out a cheesy side from him as well, but he was sometimes a little self-conscious about it. “Okay pad thai, milk tea with grass jelly…” he repeated as his fingers tapped across the screen and put in her order. For himself, he got a Thai iced tea and a pad see ew. Three months. That was a long time, and the concern only etched deeper into his features despite Abe’s attempt to try and be cool about it. He never thought he’d be the jealous type but he was less worried about Jules and more worried about the ex. “Oh. Oh uh that’s good. It’s just work, right? That’s good,” he muttered, words repeating as though he was convincing himself. “I will miss you though for those three months. Are you going far or can I visit from time to time?”

“i do it out of the kindness of my heart.” she replies, though her smile indicates that she isn’t serious. people who do not know her well might find her humour too deadpan sometimes, but her playfulness is well acknowledged by those around her. even though he tries to conceal it, it is more than obvious that he is concerned about the entire arrangement. to be fair, she cannot blame him at all for the thoughts that may already be running wild. she would be worried herself if she was in his place. “of course it’s just work.” her hands wrap around his as she offers a smile of reassurance. “i will miss you too.” ah, the conversation only gets more tricky from here. “well, half of it will be in the country, half of it will be out of it.” this doesn’t make things any easier, does it? “i’ll buy you all the souvenirs and facetime you so often that you’ll get sick of it and not want to pick up.”

‘a puppy could not spoil you the way i do and you know it,’ he chuckled, amused how she seemd to play along. jojo was relieved to see her being so relaxed about all of this, he worried she would take it personal and possibly be upset. the last he needed was also risking to lose one of his closest friends and he liked to believe they had grown close over time. jojo was not one to ask questions and accept the secrets she kept to herself, there was no need to know everything about one another. his expression was more thoughtful if thinking more of his brother. ‘my father thought of me as too soft so he took my brother who was a stubborn kid. i was ten and he six when they divorced and we were strictly forbidden to see. when i turned of age, i tried but our father cut it off. then, when chanhee was 18, he was already gone by the time iw as able to find him. he doesn’t live at a space but adores to travel around. nothing i judge him for but it never changed, i miss him. even we were just childen to me, he’s my brother.’

All Benz could do was laugh, his nerves beginning to get the best of him the closer Minjun was. It wasn’t a big deal. They had shared the same bed before. Before their relationship status became a wreck and they had a bit of a falling out. “Irresistible charms. Maybe that explains it.” He gave a playful roll of his eyes, smirk adorned on his lips as he turned onto his side to face the other. “Just don’t murder me and we’re good.” Benz contemplated moving closer. “I’m glad we’re talking again. And… I’m kind of glad your dates haven’t been going well.” He bit his lip, feeling a mixture of embarrassment yet satisfaction. “Does that make me an asshole? I feel like an asshole.” 

“Yeah, I mean-” sure. Of course, but it doesn’t have to be the reason, does it, or is she really that blind to herself? Ah, that was the problem for looking after girls who didn’t know how to look up from their own two feet, an ease to the way she stands, waiting for Ashley to catch up. In more ways than just getting dressed to leave, but, hey - she’s got the time. Instead, she holds the door, she can play the gentleman too when she wants to, her hands pocketing within her jacket, and this, well, THIS MUCH is easy to carry. “No, not really I don’t really know what I want to do and why. I’m studying business, but I don’t really care if that’s what I do or not in the end. Most of why I know him is because he knows a lot of people in my program, and he’s always coming to the bar that I work at. You should come sometime.” she’s ready for moments like this, it seems, a card in her back pocket, a crooked grin to wear at her edges. “I’ll give you a few free drinks. Just eat well.” 

The streets bleed from domestic, to commercial. Sookhee keeping easy pace despite the prettier heels, the bag that she wears on from class. “Yeah? LET’S GO THEN. Do you drink a lot? Or…” a shift, she studies her from beneath the darker fan of her lashes. “What do you usually do in your free time?” tell me more about you.

       valerie had been expecting the follow-up question, but a chunk of her still wishes for ashley to drop the conversation entirely. perhaps, she’d feel a bit better if she sees less of her. the more they hang out—whether it be with their friends or completely alone—the blurrier the lines get. it was easier to pretend to be fine when there had still been a concrete wall between them, but when valerie found herself chasing after ashley’s touches and craving for more, she knew that she was reverting to her old self: stupid and hopeful. “no. i’m tired and my head hurts.” she lies again, but it sounds more believable this time—maybe. “you?”

“I—” Haeri raised a finger at him as if to scold him but quickly dropped her arm back down. “I’m not that much older than you. Brat.” She should have seen that one coming though, given the joke she was insinuating. “Mm… finding a date through work probably isn’t the best idea, yeah.” Grabbing her phone off the table, she quickly called in an order for chicken before returning to the conversation. “You could always try the way of those cheesy shows. Bump into someone on the sidewalk. Buy someone else’s coffee. Get a dog.” She smiled. “I’d offer to be your wingman. But after everything I’ve done for you, and you call me a sugar momma…” 

Benz managed to roll his eyes with a tiny smirk at the wink thrown in his direction. “If that’s true, I don’t know why you’re complaining about the date you just got back from then.” He tried to keep his tone light because he knew Minjun was only messing around. But being called a weirdo wasn’t exactly heartwarming. Benz felt like he was digging himself into a hole by admitting out loud that he missed the other. Yet he was kind of surprised to hear those same words reciprocated. All he could do was nod, and once Minjun left to shower, Benz took care of the cookies and set his tablet on the nightstand, burrowing under the covers. Turning the bedside lamp on, he scrolled through his phone until he heard the other. “Oh, so now you are the murderer? Are we roleplaying?” Benz smiled, setting his phone on the nightstand as well. “But I can’t seem to stop myself from inviting you in. What’s that say about me?” he lifted the covers back and patted the empty side of his bed.

       the first thing miles sees when he wakes up is the glassy panels of the hospital ceiling. perplexed, his hazy eyes dart around the familiar-yet-unfamiliar sight of the emergency room. for a few seconds, he wonders if this is what heaven was like, but when he sees yisoo’s face staring down at him, he vaguely catches her mouthing the word ‘hospital’.

     getting mugged in the middle of the street isn’t a cool way to end up in the emergency room, but there’s always a silver lining: miles can finally accurately describe the pain of a stab wound. it’s not the instantaneous, blinding kind of pain like he had initially assumed—it was gradual, as if the adrenaline had given him a temporary buff that stopped him from feeling anything at all. every breath he managed to wheeze out started feeling like thick needles passing right through his chest only a few minutes after.  his voice comes out as a pathetic croak, weak and dry. “y’mean i’m not dead?” 

‘i was teasing, your outburst was quite cute, you won me over if you did not yet,’ simo enjoyed her reaction, it was sweet to see her all burning with passion for what she believed in. that way, he never had to worry about her well being, a woman who could handle herself if needed and he was glad he fell in love wit somebody like that.’now, enjoy your food, okay? you do not have to thank me, just relax and be excited.’ he kissed her cheek and just was glad to watch her like that. ‘i am glad you are relaxed again, i was a bit worried earlier,’ simo considered to important to be honest. ‘but seeing you like this, reminds me why i keep falling for you.’