my secret not so secret place

It’s like I can never escape my abuse or this feeling of terror and peril, but everyone around me continues to pretend that it isn’t real and its drowning me and degrassi is drowning me further lol. nothing has been more hurtful than people acting like they werent sure if it was true or making me feel so guilty for having a hard time leaving. But it happened in front of multiple faces and under people’s roofs but I’m still given no confidence or support. !! fuck all humanity!! 

I decided to watch fucking degrassi to distract myself from my own person problems with petty canadian fictional problems. But I happened to pick a season where one of the characters is using alcohol to self medicate while they relive past trauma of physical abuse from an unstable boyfriend who then actively blames her anxiety/depression as their excuse for using violence! What the fuck degrassi literally hitting the nail on my life’s goddamn head.