People who are like “erm why would I take a 6 hour train when I can fly there in 45 minutes” are forgetting the mental toll of Being In An Airport which shortens your lifespan by 2 months each time
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@whofilets
People who are like “erm why would I take a 6 hour train when I can fly there in 45 minutes” are forgetting the mental toll of Being In An Airport which shortens your lifespan by 2 months each time

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british money’s called “quid”, short for liquid, which used to be the official currency. any liquid. “as long as it splash we use it for cash”- old british saying
The term “bank” comes from this too, as people would go down to the river banks to collect more quid
The wealthy would store their quid in large tanks, and they would place sharks (which are smooth) in there to guard it
"mmh did you know that creator you like also posts 🔞 content? did you know that? don't you think that's weird? don't you think we should keep this space-"
no. i don't.
i booked a front row seat to the devil's sacrament and you're blocking the view
just go back to the 1660 new england hole you just crawled out of and eat barley for a week to atone for your sins or whatever
" "I booked a front row seat to the devil's sacrament and you're blocking the view" is one banger of a thematic statement. Shirt material.
"New Yorkers bite more people than sharks annually" is an excellent example of how statistics can be misleading. Like yeah no shit, do you have any idea how rare it is to even encounter a shark in the wild? They're not exactly urban animals. I'm pretty damn sure that if sharks were living in big cities like pigeons, just strolling down the streets looking for food scraps, you'd see a lot more news stories about New Yorkers biting them.
this passes peer review harder than anything has ever passed peer review in the history of peer review
when my littlest brother was a toddler he was apparently under the impression that you could get meat out of an animal without killing it in the same way you could get milk or eggs.
he expressed this as "the farmer milks the cow and then he porks the pig"

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when i was a tiny baby queer (aka a 24-year-old), i went to my first pride festival probably three months after i kicked ex-gay therapy to the curb and came out to my parents. being the people they are, my parents came with me. they weren’t really sure about this whole gay thing, but they loved me and wanted me to be safe and happy and wanted to be involved in what was important to me, so they came along. (i also think my mother still might have thought i might get drugged or murdered or beaten by a protester of which there were plenty.)
anyway i wanted a memento of my first pride, you know, and this one vendor was selling keyrings, and i liked it, so i bought one. do you remember those italian charm bracelets that were all the rage like 10-15 years ago? it was a keychain like that, and it had a rainbow rooster, a rainbow cat, and then just a rainbow, and so I bought it.
i run into my mom a couple of vendors over and she goes oh you bought something? what’d you get? so i showed her, and i was like, “I’m not sure why it’s a rooster and a cat. Seems kind of random. But I liked the rainbows.”
and my mom, who was some form of minister’s wife for most of my childhood and teenagerhood, stares at me like she thinks i’m joking.
“What?” i say.
“…it’s a cock and a pussy, Jules,” she says flatly, and that is the story of how i died at the age of 24 while attending my first pride festival.
I love how every June this one gets dug up and passed around again, lmao.
oh no is this what we’re doing now
I love the midwest so much
(mid-divorce) the american education system never taught me how to cherish a woman
@rammyrue’s tags because holy shit this is so accurate and important

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didn’t jesus do something similar to that
the clanging of his armored ass cheeks brought down the walls of many a castle
From The Book of Chivalry of Geoffroi de Charny (~1350), complaining about Knights These Days
And they are dressed in such an indecent way that that which everyone ought to be most ashamed to show is what they show all the time to those who want to look, for they cannot refrain from showing their backsides to whoever wants to see them.
What is more, it is not enough for them to be as God made them; they are not content with themselves as they are, but they gird themselves up and so rein themselves in round the middle of their bodies that they seek to deny the existence of the stomachs which God has given them: they want to pretend that they have not and never have had one, and everyone knows that the opposite is true.
Also on windows 10!! go to typing settings- how ai has helped you- typing insights-off
oh wait just realized i can edit my own posts.
like you can't edit reblogs anymore but you can still edit your own post even after it has a thousand notes or whatever.
i have the opportunity to do the funniest thing.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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grace, who has been alone for five minutes: oh my god. an alien! im not alone anymore! i hope he wants to be friends :)
rocky, coming up on 50 years of solitude, imprinting on grace in ways baby ducklings can only dream of: if you leave me to sleep where i can't watch your heart beat i am blowing up this tunnel with us both in it
free fic idea up for grabs. godspeed