Summary: After Edward leaves with Calico Jack, Stede makes a decision that changes the course of their story…

Otherwise known as - what if the lighthouse were to become the Kraken?

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Chapter 2 (2788 words)

“How long till we reach the ship?” Blackbeard asks, lighting his pipe and taking a drag. Thin tendrils of silvery smoke pass through his lips, curling in the air like the tentacles of a mighty leviathan.

“Not long,” Izzy replies, rocking back and forth on his heels, visibly uneasy. This is supposed to be an easy encounter. Textbook. But they’ve hit a snag. “They’ve already raised the white flag.”

Blackbeard groans, sucking another mouthful of smoke into his lungs. “Of course, they have.”

“Yes, but I don’t think that has anything to do with us.”

Blackbeard raises an eyebrow and turns to his first mate, a strange light glimmering in his dark eyes. 

Izzy has his attention. 

“What do you mean?”

“There’s another ship closing in on them. Fast.”

“Do we know which one?”

“Aye,” Izzy says, reluctant to exposit more. A tense silence grows as Blackbeard waits, but he doesn’t have the patience required. 

Summary: When Ed tells Izzy that he will take care of dispatching Stede while doing something he loves, he doesn’t take into account all of the possible meanings of that phrase. (2740 words)

Notes: Takes place during S1 E6 The Art of F**kery

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“Stede! Stede, wait up! I need to talk to you!”

Stede hears Edward following him to his quarters, closing in behind him, but he doesn’t stop until he reaches the bank of windows at the far end. There he stands, arms crossed, peering out at the horizon like a maudlin widow, mourning her husband lost to the sea. 

“I know you don’t think I’m up for this,” he says, confident that Edward has stopped behind him. “But even Izzy says I’m capable! That has to count for something!”

Edward opens his mouth to object but decides last minute not to burst his bubble. “I do think you’re capable. Don’t get the wrong idea.”

“Wrong idea?” Stede lets out a drawn-out, dramatic sigh. He turns, brushing past Ed, and retreats to his library. He rifles through his books, searching for a few odd horror stories to help summon his muse. “You literally said it’s too advanced for me! I will have you know that I am a better thespian than you give me credit for!”

Edward’s brow scrunches. “Thespi-who now?”

“Give me a chance!”

“This isn’t about chances.”

“What is it about then?”

“Not dying!”

Because 5 is the only episode where Ed acts like Blackbeard to Stede and around him. He’s repeatedly rude and mean to him and just generally violent around him. And every time he does it Stede meets him with kindness

When Stede is “raiding” the library and Ed tells him to stop and knocks the books out of his and Lucius’ hands, then right after Stede is teaching him how to dine and being patient as he learns

The captain then insults Ed and Ed yells at him and Stede tells him not to debase himself by talking to the man, insinuating Ed as a pirate captain is above the merchant captain

Ed then tells Fang to skin and kill the captain, which clearly freaks Stede out because hey he’s now living on a ship with a guy who after one misstep will have that done to you, but when Ed is still upset about the insults Stede gently asks what’s wrong and tries to help

At the party, Ed realizes he can get the other rich people to like him more by insulting Stede (notably he never does this again, even when in front of people like Jack he’s trying to look cool to he’ll stand up for Stede and not make fun of him) but at the party he immediately jumps onto insulting Stede for his own benefit so Stede goes to sit outside while he gets the benefit of purposely humiliating him. Then the rich people turn on Ed and he runs out of the room and Stede immediately comforts him, uses his Dad Voice to get Ed not to kill them, then he ruins the lives of everyone in that room to the point they set their own ship on fire to get back at them for what they did

And then again on deck Stede tells him despite his missteps at the party and his upbringing that he “wears fine things well” aka is still a respectable gentleman in his eyes and instead of judging the silk Ed carries he treats it with respect and incorporates it into Ed’s outfit, all of which had been bought by an actual wealthy gentleman, showing that Ed and that world could coincide and weren’t incompatible

After this in 6 and on Ed stops doing a lot of his Blackbeard persona and beyond occasional impatient snapping like on the treasure hunt he’s always nice to Stede and sticks up for him because Stede saw him as his as rude and cruel and violent self and still treated him with kindness and respect and didn’t see him as a monster

Perpetually fizzing with rage, actor Con O’Neill injects an extra frisson of horniness into his scenes with Lucius. Izzy is both repulsed and fascinated by Lucius’ sex life. He leans into Lucius’ personal space, relishing his own malice… “We don’t own each other” is an alien sentiment, not least because Izzy himself wants to be owned.

“Edward Teach Being Dramatic After A Breakup”