Wendy's Place

Not my original

HOW TO FEED A PILL TO A CAT: Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left…

Not my original.

Pretty sure this isn’t true but boy, have I been tempted..😃   A woman wrote this to her bank. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the Times.Dear Sir,I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my…

I had a call from a scammer the other day. Me: “Hello.”Scammer: (Heavy Foreign Accent) “Hello. This is Tom Smith from Microsoft Support. We are seeing a lot of virus activity coming from your device.”Me: “Oh no. My device? Are you sure?”Scammer: “Oh yes, Madam. We have many reports.”Me: “Oh, jeez. How can I fix it?”Scammer: “It’s okay, Madam. We can help you right now. Are you in front of your…

Not my photo

A woman buys a beautiful parrot from a pet shop, but she quickly discovers it has a terrible, foul mouth and won’t stop screaming profanities. She tries playing soft music, talking nicely to it, and covering the cage, but nothing works. Finally, in total frustration, she grabs the parrot and throws it into the freezer to cool off. The parrot makes a huge fuss—squawking, screaming, and pounding on…

Not my original.

My side of the story doesn’t matter anymore.There was a time when being understood felt urgent. When explaining every detail, defending every decision, and correcting every misunderstanding felt necessary. You wanted people to see your heart. To grasp what really happened. To validate the pain you carried. You thought if they just understood your perspective, something would feel resolved.But…

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