Where God Finds You

Somethings should stay in my notes app

Sharp objects is the only thing that helps suicide ideation….

i'm ranting again. I hate hate hate i don't remeber what fully happend to me. it's the fucking worst I'm tired of having to trust my body as it fukcing spasms for the 100th time in one night. I wish I could remember soooo bad every single detail like i do the other shit i went though. this is the one fucking thing that is driving me crazyyy. i'm so fucking annoyed and i'm angry. fuck this stupid fucking boyd for trying to protect me i don't giv e a fuck

My biggest nightmare is being in a room full of pick me filmmakers who reference indie A24 films to show they’re niche & different

oh i'm definitely watching the chronology of water again

i went to therapy today and didn't feel like shit. Fuck this faggot daddy for fucking me when I was young and i blacked out during it. i think but don't remember. i'm everything. he's nothing. I'm more than that traumaaaa bitch. did it affect every bit of me. YES. am i still that kid he fucked. HELL FUCKING NO. I have dreams of killing him. taking the breath out of his lungs. There's only so much peace you can give yourself. this life is cruel. he will live on and get to have his wife and kids BUT SO WILL I. FUCK HIM. I'm not the product of trauma. I'm the story I made after. there's so much power in storytelling. We are not the stories people fuck us into. We are the stories we fuck for ourselves. I fucked my path to where I am now. i fucked life, men, myself. I'm proud of it. Fuck the motherfuckers.