nego cijeni svaki gutljaj

I can say that in my 20 something years of life on this amazing planet earth, I have experienced love, or I guess I have? what even is love? and I am not thinking about those cheesy basic quotes we have all read about love. I am thinking of the deeper meaning of love. when I was younger I always thought love is just being in love with someone or loving your parents, siblings, friends or whoever. later on, I realized how word love is often used just like that and I was not even sure what it stood for. love visited my life a few times in terms of having a relationship with someone and every time I thought that was it and that is what love is supposed to feel and look like. well I guess not, because after a few months when I take my pink colored glasses off I see that I was delusional after all. or was I? that is the thing about love, it is so hard to define it and yet so easy to think that what we feel is love. if you ask me, I think love is a lot of things. not just being in love with someone and thinking they are your soulmate. love is my friends taking care of me when needed, love is my mum making my favorite meal for lunch, love is a stranger holding the door for me, love is a bus driver waiting for me because he saw me running to catch a bus. love is my dad buying a certain snack just because I once mentioned I liked it, love is my brother that keeps all my secrets and stays my safe person through years. then I think: was I delusional for thinking something was love or it really was love at a certain moment? now, I don’t think I was always delusional, because love can come and go. just like happiness or sadness don’t last forever, it is the same with love. we are sometimes trying so hard to keep certain type of love alive without realizing that love actually is everywhere around us. when you lose that one person that was your concept of love, you are able to see all other forms of love. I felt like the world was ending and that I will never be loved again. actually, I was loved the whole time, just experiencing different forms of love. love sometimes reminds me of water, you know, because water changes; it can be hot, cold, ice, snow, whatever but still the main ingredient is water. it is in our human nature to crave love and just because u do not receive love in a form you would like to, it doesn’t mean the love is not there. it took me a long time to figure that out because I was so dependent on that romantical love and that was my idea of everything love should be. you can always find love in your own little bubble and trust me, most of the time, we all are love.