It's aw aboot the banter

Merlin's Grave.

I met up with a friend today and ended up on a quest to find Merlin’s grave in the Scottish Borders. I never knew about this until a few hours ago that according to legend Merlin ended his days in Scotland. 

According to The Reader’s Digest’s Encyclopaedia of Folklore, Myths and Legends of Great Britain, Merlin raised an army of pagan warriors and led them into battle against the Christian community of Strathclyde.  The pagan campaign ended disastrously.  Merlin’s army was slaughtered and Merlin himself – driven insane by grief and guilt – spent the rest of his life living as a hermit in the forests of southern Scotland.

So we arrived in Drumelzier, a wee village on the B712 in the Tweed Valley in search of this grave. My friend Leslie had tried in vain to locate it about 20 years before, all we had to go on was information on Canmore website, which is part of Historic Environment Scotland, it told us that “ According to legend which is at least as old as the 15th century, the wizard Merlin was buried 200 yds NNW of Drumelzier Church, on the level haugh close to the right bank of the River Tweed” We found the Kirk and climbed a wooden stile behind it to a line of trees, Leslie had been told the grave was marked by a tree, information I found online told us that it had been swept away in the 1920,s but another tree had been planted more recently, we spotted a couple walking dogs and they  directed us to the bush you see in the first pic, it had a plaque below it seen in the second pic. Job done, Leslie was pleased as punch, but the day wasn’t over, we jumped back in the car and drove towards Stobo stopping short of the village and up to Altarstone Farm, the clue was in the name, Leslie pointed towards a large square boulder opposite, unless you knew it was there you wouldn’t look twice at it, even if it caught your eye it just looked like a lump of concrete half hidden by the foliage, he told us before Merlin died he converted to Christianity after meeting Saint Kentigern (aka St Mungo) here and this was called The Altar Stane.

I refer to Canmore once again it has a couple of things noted through the years,  “A large stone in the wall at the roadside near the farm to which it gives name. It is of a somewhat cylindrical shape about five feet high and six feet in diameter. The top forms a plane, smooth surface and it is supposed to have formed the Altar of a druid’s Temple or some such object, there is no tradition respecting it. It is always called the Altar Stone but why it is so called, the Proprietor of the estate says, cannot be ascertained.Name Book 1856.” and “There are marks on the upper surface of the stone - said to have been made by a witch.J W Buchan and H Paton (eds) 1927.” 

On to Stobo Kirk and a stained glass window of Kentigern baptising  Myrddin, the name Merlin is derived from in the Welsh language. 

Children, get out and let us old historians talk about… eh… Ancient Rome.

One of the biggest taboos regarding sex in ancient Rome was oral sex. The profanation of one’s mouth was seen as big dishonor since the mouth was the main channel of communication and social life. Being called a fellator was a horrible insult.

When king Francesco of the Two Sicilies visited the archaeological museum of Naples, he was angry and shocked by the incredible amount of erotic pieces that people has found in Pompeii. Thus he ordered them to be in a special secret room. And the Gabinetto Segreto of the Museum was born.

Relations among men were not bad seen. However, if a free man of status and prestige assumed a bottom role, it was almost a crime. But, as for the slaves, being a bottom was their duty.

The chastity of the Vestals priestesses was considered to have a direct bearing on the health of the Roman state. And if one of them violated this rule, the punishment was horrible, sometimes they were even burned alive.

The philosopher Dioscorides claimed that the consumption of water lily in order to stop erotic dreams.

Antinous was a slave lover of emperor Hadrian. He died during their travel to Egypt, in strange circumstances. He was deified and the emperor erected the city of Antinopolis in his honor.

“why granny, what a large bolter you have.”

“All the better to purge you with heretic!”