We Can't High Five

I was about to go to sleep and then this bullshit showed up on my dash and you have all earned yourselves fedoras so sit down, shut up, and educate your stupid asses.

“Putting them in the friendzone”? I’m sorry did you mean “I was nice to a girl and I cared about her and I’m bitter because she didn’t want me back?” Or was it “I believe that if I love another person they’re a bitch for just wanting to be friends.” Perhaps it was “I treated her (or pretended to, rather) like a person instead of a sexual object and now she’s not being a sexual object for me like I deserve.” No, wait, it’s “friendship with a girl makes me angry because I’m a self-entitled shithead who feels like if I want to be with a girl she has to accept that regardless of her feelings or else she’s a total bitch.”

The friendzone is the concept that a girl wanting to be your friend is somehow this inherently awful thing. Like, wow, did it occur to you that she thought you were, I dunno, FRIENDS? Did it occur to you that maybe she doesn’t feel romantically towards you but she still wants you to be part of her life because she thinks you’re a great person? I mean, if this is your reaction you’re wrong, because if you think friendzoning is a thing then clearly you’re a fucktrumpet but that’s beside the point.

Women are not machines you put niceness coins into until sex comes out. There are no punchcards to fill out to get to sex that you are apparently entitled to.

There is no friendzone, there are only people who don’t know how to behave like they’re not five-year-olds who don’t know how to take “no” for an answer.

REVERSE.