despite everything i'm still human.

“I’m going to tell Grandma, bans on salad aren’t a thing.” There’s a shake of his head, and he walked further into the room. Eyeing up the sweet in her hand, Fred leant forward and tried to swipe it off her. “Well, actually, I was going to say ME. Vegetables are way more healthy than fruit; it’s a fact, I’m a scientist.”

“You wouldn’t dare!” she replied and stuck out her tongue in defiance, her nose scrunching. “But I’m twenty two so... What could she really do to stop me and my totally real and legit salad ban?” When he reached for her jelly worms, Molly saw the attack coming from a mile away (or so she would like to think), and quickly hid the sweets behind her back. “Nuh-uh... Both a snitch and a thief in one day, Weasley? One might think you’re treading awfully close to the dark side... ‘Cause ya know, even scientists can switch sides.”

“Fine, fine. What’s gotten your panties in a twist?” Camilla rolled her eyes slightly. “Okay, so he’s on the fourth floor, room 412. He’s really cute, if you don’t focus on the elephant ears. Kind of like David Beckham, really. I’d so bang him.”

“Not really a fan of bestiality, myself.” Molly’s lips turned upwards into a smug smirk and she shot Camilla a glaring look. “I just like being professional. I take my job seriously, which you.... Clearly don’t. But seriously. Whatever. I’m just here for work. Let’s not make it personal.”

A roll of her eyes as she turned around to face Molly. “What’re you implying?”

“Just that karma works in mysterious ways, so... Better not risk it. I mean, since it’s you.”

( &&. @weasleyii. )

“Did you eat the salad I left out?” Fred called as soon as he opened the door, tugging the beanie off of his head. “You better have. I keep saying you need to eat your greens more often. They’re good for you!”

“Still got a strict ban on salad, Fred,” Molly said and leaned back in her chair before biting off the head of her jelly slug. “Might as well stop trying. These are the only greens I need.” She paused and shot her roommate a small smirk, her eyes sparkling. “Ya know, fruit’s healthy too. And I eat more fruit than you do, so.... Who’s the real winner here? And if you say both of us, I’ll smack ya.”

“– What? Pffft, yeah, of course I was listening. I know exactly what you were saying.”

“Whatever, it wasn’t important. Just do your job and tell me what floor they put the muggle with the elephant ears so I can go do my job. Thanks.”

“Call me ‘Dollface’ one more time and I’ll use your own wand to hex your mouth SHUT.”

"Use your own damn wand, Longbottom. Wouldn’t want it to backfire on ya.”