hello, i'm sorry if this is a random question, but would you care to write some meta on carrie and her thoughts on religion? i've always been so interested in carrie as a character and you seem to have her down perfectly
okay first of all -- thank you so much?? like just this whole ask is so flattering + of course i could write papers on this so. my disclaimer: i was brought up in a mostly-white private christian school, raised southern baptist, live in the bible belt, + now practice secular w.itchcraft. so my past will be heavily drawn upon here -- though i am in no way comparing margaret’s beliefs to my family’s, nor myself to carrie. it’s just my understanding. this’ll be under a cut bc i got long winded aaaa
in the novel, it’s made very clear that, while margaret focuses more on the old testament-style God of Wrath + the bloodier, less forgiving side of her already radical christianity, carrie’s beliefs (though heavily influenced by margaret, of course) are softer. the decorations in her room are described in lighter colors, using a lot of Lamb imagery + pictures of jesus with the little children, etc. even before discovering her abilities, carrie does sometimes doubt her momma’s teachings. after all, her momma says that doing certain things will get you Smited in an instant, but she sees people do those things all the time. so she can’t help wondering, though she feel horrible guilt about it. doubting is almost as bad as not believing, + that sends you to Hell.
obviously, carrie is extremely repressed. she isn’t actually allowed to read the Bible herself, only listen to what her momma reads her. so while she’s aware of the Redemption story, she doesn’t realize how it includes everyone. + carrie is a bit more tolerant than margaret, if only because she has that seed of doubt in her. carrie may initially be wary of those with different faiths (barring the j.ewish community, as they are God’s chosen people) but, given time + kindness, won’t deny them. carrie also shows her doubt by denying that Satan gave her powers -- it’s just her powers, they didn’t come from anywhere else.
now, in my post-canon verse in which she survives + runs away, etc., carrie is actively trying to unlearn everything her momma taught her. she feels as though when she killed margaret, she killed God. (we’re not unpacking all that right now, but hoo boy could i!) carrie isn’t sure what is + isn’t true in re: her Christianity, + therefore is separating herself from that entirely. she may eventually attend a far more normal church, + adjust, but post-canon carrie is very afraid of religion, + is terribly unaware of what she can + can’t do as a person. + considering that the canon era is the 70′s, she couldn’t just go on the web + learn about these things. so she walks herself through a long, painful process of de-conditioning herself from the radical belief system margaret had installed in her.
tl;dr: pre-prom carrie finds solace in her God, but fear + doubt in her momma’s God. post-prom carrie isn’t sure there even is a God, + doesn’t trust the thought of one.
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“ i want your love . ”
“ you know that i want you . ”
“ you know that i need you . ”
“ you’re a criminal as long as you’re mine . ”
“ i want your love . i don’t wanna be friends . ”
“ i’m so into you , i can barely breathe . ”
“ close ain’t close enough ‘til we cross the line . ”
“ is this gonna happen ? ”
“ i’ve been waiting and waiting for you to make a move . ”
“ it’s a little bit dangerous , but baby , that’s how i want it . ”
“ i’m so into you . ”
“ this could take some time . ”
“ i’ve made too many mistakes —— i need to get this right . ”
“ i can’t wait anymore . ”
“ you’re so hypnotising . ”
“ they say be afraid . ”
“ you’re not like the others . ”
“ they don’t understand you . ”
“ you’re from a whole other world , a different dimension . ”
“ infect me with your loving . fill me with your poison . ”
“ your kiss is cosmic . ”
“ this is transcendental ; on another level … ”
“ you’re my lucky star . ”
“ for you i risk it all . ”
“ i’m jealous . i’m overzealous . ”
“ baby , believe me . ”
“ i can love you just like that , but i can leave just as fast . ”
“ you don’t judge me . ”
“ you don’t judge me , ‘cause if you did , baby , i would judge you too . ”
“ i’ve got issues , but you’ve got ‘em too . ”
“ we’ll bask in the glory of all our problems , ‘cause we’ve got the kind of love it takes to solve them . ”
“ i’ve got issues , and one of them is how bad i need you . ”
“ you just take my breath away . ”
“ you can do no wrong . ”
“ i’m empty when you’re gone . ”
“ give me your attention , baby . ”
“ you walk around here like you wanna be someone else . ”
“ treasure ; that is what you are . ”
“ don’t you dare look back ; just keep your eyes on me . ”
“ you’re holding back . ”
“ shut up and dance with me . ”
“ i felt it in my chest as you looked at me ; i knew we were bound to be together . ”
“ i don’t know how it happened . ”
“ i can’t focus on what needs to get done . ”
“ i’m just tryna play it cool now . ”
“ you make it difficult to not overthink . ”
“ when i’m with you , i turn all shades of pink . ”
“ i wanna touch you , but i don’t wanna be weird - ”
“ it’s such a rush . ”
“ wish you were here . ”
“ i got a fascination with your presentation . ”
“ i fill my calendar with stuff i could do ; maybe if i’m busy , it could keep me from you . ”
“ it’s true that i’m a little bit intense . ”
“ it’s true that i’m a little bit intense , right . but who can blame me when you keep me on the fence ? ”
“ you’re not good at all . ”
“ you lie , you bluff , you’re unreliable . ”
“ you’ve got no conscience . ”
“ even i know this ain’t smart . ”
“ please don’t cry , i will be alright . ”
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hrmm . probably still wont be Very active on here but . gave myself the basic theme bc i dont care !!!!! (give me a day or two n i will Care but rn ? no !!) edit: will likely be lurking on @lucioleptit, bc thats my baby
@vintborn: it doesn’t always matter where we are but here i am and i say hello.
“hello,” you parrot. you don’t quite understand the rest of that statement, but you know it’s polite to say hello back. everything else in the world may be inside out + upside down, its icky innards spilling out into the unknown, but saying hello is the right thing to do. + you know it always will be. “hello,” you repeat.
IT MEANS MORE THAN she could possibly know , and it means nothing all at the same time . he scuffs his boot against the ground , finding satisfaction in the black mark it leaves . ‘ thanks . ’ then , feeling like he hasn’t said enough : ‘ outcasts have to stick together , right ? that’s the way the story’s supposed to go . that’s the kinda shit they write books about . ’
you don’t read enough books to know whether or not he’s lying. but the outcasts stick together in the Good Book, so you figure he must be right. “um -- yeah. that ... that sounds ‘bout right.” does this make you friends? is that a safe guess? how do you know if someone is your friend. how could you ever tell, since you have never had one before? you can’t overstep. so you assume that’s not the case yet.
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