Why Is He Silent

May we never be the reason for it.

It made me question, what's in them, that made their person stayed no matter what. They're not even worthy.

Then there's me, who has been trying to be better everyday, trying to be a a better lover since day one, trying to figure out how to have a better future for the family I wanted to build with her. But then she left me, for another man.

It was a life-changing-kind of pain.

But I have no choice to learn this the hard way. To never take everything personal. One person's mistake does not represent all the mistakes there could be.

Hi Chin Chin..

It's been 3 months since you broke up with me. No need to describe what I've been through and this msg isn't about that.

I'm writing this to you to let you know that I don't want us to end up in a completely bad term because you've been a significant part of me for 2 years. It felt like 2 decades, that's why it was so hard to forget you. Sa helmet, eyeglass, jacket, lumpia, tubeless tires, naulanan sa bdo, yung gusto mong maging pulis, ultimong itlog na maalat naaalala kita. Haaays, hindi ko naman ginugusto pero you're just everywhere. (I never tried seeing you, but this island is just too small for us. Ironic, ‘cause I thought I won’t be seeing you anymore. Kaya nga labis labis ang pakiusap kong makita ka man lang at makausap sa huling pagkakataon.) Everything just reminds me of you. And I want to remember you in all the right ways that you made me happy. When we were both genuinely happy, simula ng bumaba ka ng tryc sa vtc from overtime sa duty at nag smile ka saken sa malayo, yung reaction mo right before pinakilala kita sa kina mama, yung pagrent natin ng tryc para magpatulong sa manghuhula, at yung paglakad natin sa napakadilim na daan sa Legazpi. I don't want to feel sad anymore thinking of those times. So I'm turning them as happy memories now.

My point is, may pinagsamahan tayo. So if there will ever be a time that you need anything I can help you with, I don't want you to feel awkward. Yes, I'm offering a friendship but not the type where we hang out. I won’t ask to see you personally as well. I want you to be completely happy. I don't want you hiding yourself from me or the people in my life. Okay? I've learned that in life, dapat sport lang. Let it slide.

Ang sakit sakit pa rin, Shen.

Sobra sobrang sakit pa rin.

Mahal na mahal pa rin kita.

Sana alagaan ka nya.

You chose not to tell me, you lied to me.

You went on talking to him, you cheated on me.

What we had is so real, you betrayed me.

I don't deserve any of that.

You put me in hell, and I don't deserve to be hurt like that.

I've done nothing but good to you.

Not the present.

So leave it all behind.