𝕴𝖓𝖙𝖔 𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕴𝖓𝖋𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖔: 》 • 𝕵𝖔𝖊𝖑 𝕸𝖎𝖑𝖑𝖊𝖗 • 《 𝐗𝐈. 𝐅𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐌𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬
A/N: Hi guys! Here is chapter eleven. It’s a tough one. But every now and then there will be some fluff too—I think that’s necessary. Please also share your reactions so I know what you think; I definitely appreciate criticism as well. I’m curious to hear what you think of Claudia and her relationship with Joel and Ellie. In this chapter, that will become a bit clearer. I’m actually quite proud of the GIF above haha. It’s not the best, but I tried to edit it as well as I could. So it’s Joel and Claudia laughing at Ellie’s joke and feeling joy for the first time after all those miserable years.
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
THE PESSOA-WOMAN WAS HALF-CONSCIOUS UNTIL A HAIL OF BULLETS CAME TOWARD HER AND THE SMUGGLER, SHATTERING THE WINDOW. Joel quickly unbuckled his seatbelt and threw himself over her. They stayed there for a few seconds until the shooting toward them briefly stopped.
The man from the South slightly lifted his head while his hands were still holding the back of the woman’s head beneath him. Her eyes were closed. She didn’t make a sound. His heart started beating faster, and he looked wildly between her eyes. Did it hit her? Had he failed again?
The teenager from the back seat placed her palms on both of the adults’ seats and looked with wide eyes at the woman lying there.
However, a few seconds later the woman’s large doe-like eyes slowly opened. She still didn’t make a sound, nor did her hands move to acknowledge where she was. She looked around, and eventually she saw Joel, who was staring at her with furrowed, wide eyes.
“You’re not hurt, nothin?” he asked quickly, looking from Claudia to Ellie, posing the question to both girls.
Ellie shook her head, “I don’t think so.”
However, panic and fear took hold of the Latina-woman. She began to whimper, and her breathing grew heavier.
Joel quickly looked her in the eyes again. He saw her worry and fear. He shook his head at her to reassure her that they would get out of this,
"They're gonna kill us," she said, still not convinced.
“We’ll get out of this,” Joel said, holding both sides of her face, then looking from her to Ellie, who was clearly panicking as she stared through the windows at the scene unfolding outside. By looking at Claudia and then quickly at the Williams girl and back again, Joel made it clear he didn’t want to cause the child any more distress. They needed to stand strong as her guardians now, however difficult that might be. He, however, took on the role of the man, choosing to protect the women by his side from whatever came next.
Claudia immediately realized that she wouldn’t be setting a good example for Ellie by reacting like this. She acted right away and unbuckled her seatbelt.
Then the bullets started coming again as they were trying to get out.
“Belts off,” Joel shouted, “Fast!”
They had to hurry. The brunette got out first and immediately went to Ellie to help her out, while also thinking to grab her backpack at the same time. Once everyone was out, the two adults grabbed their hunting rifles, ready to fight back.
“Let’s see you, motherfucker! Give us your shit, you make it through this! I promise!”
A threat that made Claudia’s blood run cold. The scene made her think back to the day she fled from the gang members. They shouted and screamed through the neighborhood, while terrified people cried out, and threats hung in the air. It was a nightmare.
With a toddler in her arms and the desperation she felt at that moment, it was indescribable. She had managed to save her son. Now, however, she hoped she would succeed again with the 14-year-old teenager she felt responsible for.
Joel spotted a hiding spot through the wall. “Hey,” he caught Ellie’s attention, “You see that hole? Can you squeeze through?”
Claudia looked toward the corner the smuggler was pointing at. There, she indeed saw a gap. It was the least exposed place where they could keep Ellie safe and unnoticed until things calmed down.
A couple warning shots caused them all to flinch, Claudia throwing an arm over Ellie’s body instinctively.
“When I say go, you crawl through that wall,” Joel instructed, “And you squeeze through, and you don’t come out until we say, okay?”
Just after he said that, even heavier gunfire hit the truck, and the other windows were also shattered. Ellie looked from one side to the other, along with the woman sitting behind her.
“And they’re not gonna hit you,” Joel kept going, Ellie was already turning in concern towards Claudia, “Look at me!”
“We’ve got you, kid,” Claudia said firmly, not letting her fear show.
Ellie turned to Joel, he drove the promise home. “They’re not gonna hit you.”
Another bullet came too close for comfort.
“You stay down, you stay low, you stay quiet,” Joel instructed, trying to give her as much information as possible in an attempt to soothe her fears.
“Okay,” Joel said, looking over to Claudia. The women nodded at him firmly with a serious gaze, giving the hint she's ready.
On cue, Ellie began to belly crawl across the floor while Claudia and Joel got to their feet. The woman had her weapon aimed at the target, but first glanced at the teenager who was making her way toward the den. Once she got inside, Claudia felt reassured that she was now safe and finally ready to take out the hunters.
The two adults looked at each other and knew exactly what the other was thinking. Their eyes said everything, without a single word being spoken.
As the other spread out to the opposite side, the two began to take aim and fire.
Claudia, gripping her shotgun tightly with both hands, alert and sharp-eyed, aimed her weapon at an approaching hunter and pulled the trigger. After him, she took out three more in the blink of an eye. She was determined to make it out of there alive.
While Joel was also busy on the other side, a hunter suddenly rushed in from a nearby corner—one Claudia hadn’t noticed because he’d been well hidden—and grabbed her by the throat. The brunette instinctively seized his wrist and immediately reached for the knife she had concealed under her shirt, plunging it into his neck several times, making him groan.
The smuggler on the other side of the truck saw it all happen and immediately aimed his weapon, shooting the hunter in the head. Within seconds, the hunter collapsed to the ground, and Claudia was freed.
The brunette looked toward Joel and immediately moved to his side, picking up her shotgun from the ground that she had dropped during the attack. Now together, they kept watch and stayed hidden. It seemed there was only one left, and he was clearly upset that all his friends had been taken out, judging by the way he was shouting across the street.
Claudia looked at Joel, her breathing slightly heavy. A strange kind of exhaustion washed over her. Not that it was unusual in a situation like this, but her gaze drifted to her hands, which were lightly stained with blood. She frowned, wondering where it had come from.
Then she noticed it—her shirt, still mostly clean, except for one perfectly round bloodstain on her abdomen. She had been hit. Grazed, she assumed, without even realizing it. Now that she saw it, a wave of dizziness struck her, and she brought a hand to her forehead to steady herself.
Joel hadn’t noticed anything, as he was so focused on the last hunter approaching their position. He grabbed Claudia by the arm and silently pulled her along, both of them taking cover behind the washing machine. He told her he’d handle this one.
The woman nodded and tried to hold on, not wanting to distract Joel with her injury. She stayed hidden and waited until it was all over.
While they waited in silence, she heard footsteps approaching their position. Sensing the moment perfectly, Joel rose in sync and immediately shot, dropping the attacker to the ground. And then, for a moment, everything went quiet.
Then Claudia carefully stood up as well, her shotgun in hand, while the smuggler tried to reload—but his weapon jammed. She watched for a moment, but her balance wavered again. Joel looked up and noticed it. Just as he was about to ask what was wrong, a figure suddenly burst in through the back door, and the two barely had time to react.
Halfway through her dizziness, Claudia was snapped back into reality when a young man rushed toward them with his rifle. Joel struck him with the butt of his weapon, but it unfortunately didn’t have much effect, and the attacker managed to hold on.
Claudia, despite her condition, tried to raise her shotgun as quickly as possible, but the young man turned, knocked the weapon out of her hands, and struck her in the face as well, sending her to the ground.
The attacker climbed on top of Joel and tried to choke him, pressing the rifle against his throat. He had managed to overpower him, and the older man struggled beneath him.
"Now you're gonna fucking pay! For what you fucking did! You fucking killed yourselves, motherfuckers!"
Claudia, who had hit the ground hard with her injured abdomen, lay momentarily trapped in pain as she processed what was happening. She forced herself to focus, trying to regain her strength and shake off the shock so she could reach her shotgun again. It was clear the younger man assumed she had been knocked out.
The plan was for him to think she had been knocked unconscious, without realizing she was faking it. That way, she intended to silently reach for her shotgun and take him out, even though she was still dizzy.
However, her plan was interrupted by a sudden gunshot. The hunter who was on top of Joel was thrown off him with a pained groan.
The woman looked confused and frowned as she sat on the ground, turning toward where the shot had come from. There, she saw the Williams-girl standing with a pistol in her hands, trembling from what she had just done.
Claudia looked at Ellie, overwhelmed by a mix of emotions. Part of her had expected something like this to happen eventually, given how often she had insisted on using weapons. And yet, despite that, she couldn’t deny the sharp sting of guilt and pain that ran through her—the realization that she had left the girl with no real choice but to commit a act she could never undo.
“No, no, no, no, no,” Joel and Claudia’s attacker cried as Ellie took a step towards him, “It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s over. We’re not fighting anymore.”
Joel tried to catch his breath. He had been pinned like that for several minutes, and needed a moment to recover.
“I’m gonna go home,” the guilty promised, “I’ll tell everyone you’re good,” he began to cry, “I don’t know what to do. My legs don’t work.”
Claudia stared absentmindedly toward the young man, a distant look in her eyes. She was still on the ground, holding her abdomen. Then she saw Ellie approaching her. The teenager helped the woman to her feet, offering a hand while wrapping her other arm around Claudia’s back for support. Claudia met her gaze as she slowly stood up.
Ellie still looked overwhelmed with emotion and avoided meeting the woman’s gaze. Claudia, despite her own distress, saw through her struggle. How could she not feel this way?
All attention then shifted back to the smuggler, who finally managed to find the strength to stand up.
“My mom isn’t far,” the man continued to bargain for his life, “If you could get me to her.”
The Pessoa-woman, standing beside Ellie, watched with slightly widened eyes as the young man spoke for his own benefit, without even being interrupted. Joel glanced over at her, finally able to take in her injury now that he had the chance.
“We could trade with you guys,” the man tried to reason with Ellie, “We could be friends. I didn’t know. I’m Bryan, I’m Bryan. What’s your name?”
Claudia clenched her teeth and looked at the boy with frustrated, wide eyes as he tried to act friendly toward Ellie. The request only made her more angry, and she muttered sharply, “Pendejo..”
In sync with her words, without Joel and Ellie noticing, she stepped toward Bryan and kicked him hard in the groin.
The smuggler immediately grabbed her around the waist and pulled her back, restraining her. Ellie’s eyes darted between Bryan and Claudia, unsettled. She was startled by the woman’s sudden aggression, but still said nothing.
Joel maneuvered Claudia back a bit, turning her away from Bryan. Then he looked toward Ellie, stepped forward, and held out his hand, gesturing for her to hand over the weapon. Without hesitation, she did.
“Wait, wait, wait,” Bryan sniffled, picking up the knife dropping it at their feet, “You can have it. It’s a good knife.”
Joel bent over to pick it up, turning to Ellie after. “Get behind the wall,” he growled.
“No, no, no, no,” Bryan cried, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please, please, we could just talk. I’m sorry! I’m-“
Ellie looked between him and Claudia, not knowing what to do, she waited until she got her answer when the woman beside her didn’t really look her in the eyes and instead turned away toward the other side. So a few seconds later, she made her way back to the opening and quickly slipped inside.
Bryan kept pleading, but no one was listening—he didn’t deserve it. Claudia had dealt with men like him countless times over the years. She recognized the type. Manipulative bastards trying to twist situations in their favor.
It didn’t work on her anymore. Not after what she’d been through—things that had shattered her life in ways that couldn’t be undone. If begging and crying could have fixed things, the world would probably be different. But that’s not how it works.
And Bryan was young too—born into a world like this. He could have been Claudia’s son. But he wasn’t a child who didn’t understand what he was doing. He was old enough to know exactly what he was involved in, and to understand the consequences and judgment that would come with it.
The fact was, no matter who it was—and Claudia had always carried that understanding with her—her sense of justice was so strong that she would ignore even her own bloodline if they committed a wrongdoing that required punishment.
So, following that logic, Claudia looked away as Joel moved toward Bryan, who was still shouting, crying, and begging for his life. Joel drove the knife he had been given into the young man’s chest, and just like that, it was over.
Joel remained frozen for a moment and was still sitting by Bryan’s body when he finally chose to stand up and turn toward the woman, who had her back to him. She waited until he had finished the deed.
Claudia felt his eyes burning into her back, and she turned around to face him. Immediately, the Southern man’s gaze fell on her injured stomach. He hadn’t had the chance to ask about it all this time.
“The bullet must have just grazed it, I think. I’ll be fine,” Claudia said when she noticed.
Joel nodded. “Ellie,” he called out, “We gotta get in there. We can’t fit through.”
“There’s some stuff against the door,” she replied.
“Well, can you move it?” Joel asked.
The adults went to the back of the laundromat and made their way to the door there. Together with Ellie, who pushed the items aside that were stacked in front of it, they used all their strength to shove it open. Joel, however, held back an injured Claudia, who also wanted to help push. “No, leave it. I’ll do it.”
Claudia looked up to him and listened. Then it worked and the door opened, and they went inside as quickly as possible. They slammed the door shut.
“I’m okay,” Ellie was quick to say, reaching for her pack, “I’m good. I, uh, got some food in here still, and I got your light still. And you're backpack, Claudia. Here.”
"Thanks, kiddo." the women said, but Joel took it over. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulls her closer to him.
That made her frown. “I can walk by myself.”
Joel rolled his eyes but said nothing and didn’t let go. Even Claudia’s weak protest didn’t make him change his mind, and she eventually let him carry on.
“We go up,” Joel answered, already on the move.
“Hopefully we spot a clear route out,” Joel opened the door that would lead them outside, “Stay close.”
The three of them moved through the back room of the building, daylight greeting them as they found their way outside. Joel led them along the alley, finding cover behind an old car. They could hear the attacker’s calls for Bryan and the subsequent ones of terror when they found his body.
“Ellie, I’m going first with Claudia toward that door,” Joel said, “Only when I say it’s okay, you come as fast as you can, alright?”
The teenager nodded. Watching Joel taking the injured Claudia to the door and when they there, he gestured she can come, which she does.
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For the time being, they had taken shelter in a bar, and Joel carefully laid Claudia down on the floor. He then took a brief look through the window.
“They’re not FEDRA,” Ellie said, “They’re not Fireflies. Who are they?”
“People,” Joel answered as he continued to watch.
"Yeah for now, but we gotta keep moving," Claudia answered for Joel, who was looking at her and then to her wound.
“There’s a really tall building, like, four blocks away,” Ellie reported.
“Yeah, saw it,” Joel replied.
“So that’s the one?” Ellie asked.
“As soon as we don’t hear a truck,” Joel said, “We move. Fast as we can.”
Claudia nodded and held her stomach. It was still tightening with pain, and it needed to be patched up.
“Alright, let’s take a look,” Joel said as he walked toward Claudia and crouched down beside her. The woman looked up at him with a slightly pained expression before glancing back down at her stomach. At first, she doubted she would let him examine the wound, because she felt she could handle it herself just fine.
The smuggler looked her in the eyes for a moment, and their gazes locked briefly. Then Claudia looked away and began unbuttoning her shirt, lifting her tank top halfway up to reveal her bare stomach, exposing the wound.
Joel frowned as he studied the wound with concentration. Ellie also watched closely.
The Williams girl looked through the woman’s backpack standing next to her to see if there was anything they could use to patch her up, “Maybe there’s something in here.”
“Hhm, there is,” Claudia nodded. “There was disinfectant bottle, along with some gauze. And in the front pocket, there’s still a small box of bandages.”
The smuggler looked over at the teenager, who pulled out everything the woman had asked for. The girl came over and handed it to Joel, who gestured with his hands for her to give it to him. She did.
Joel placed the supplies beside him and took the gauze, applying some disinfectant to it. Claudia watched him as he worked, her eyes moving from his face to his hands as they busied themselves.
“This is gonna sting,” Joel said.
“I know,” Claudia said. “Just do it.”
With one last serious look, he pressed the gauze against her wound. For a second, it drew a sharp gasp from the woman. He didn’t look up, because he knew that reaction would come.
He stayed there for a few more seconds while she was still softly groaning. “Just a little more.”
After that, he made a final pass over the wound and then pulled back, which brought a sense of relief to Claudia as well.
Then Joel took a self-adhesive bandage and placed it over her stomach. After that, the brunette pulled herself together again, straightening her tank top and shirt.
The smuggler reached for his own backpack and pulled out a bottle of alcohol, along with something small and white in his hands that he had taken from the box containing bandages earlier. Claudia didn’t know about it and didn’t understand what it was, until Joel handed it to her, and she could clearly see what it was.
A painkiller. Lucky bastard.
“This will ease the pain,” he said as he placed it in her outstretched hand.
Together with the bottle he handed her, she took the pill into her mouth and swallowed it with a sip of the drink. “Thank you,” she muttered, looking at him as she handed the bottle back. He nodded.
"You feel better?" Ellie asked the women.
Claudia nodded and Ellie did the same thing and sit beside the women. Joel put everything back into his backpack and then stood up, moving to sit somewhere in front of the two girls.
They sat there then, taking a moment to recover from all the chaos. Claudia had pulled her knees up to her chest and was looking away, not meeting the eyes of her travel companions. They stayed like that for a few minutes until Ellie finally broke the silence again.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
The woman looked from the girl to the older man sitting in front of them. The question was clearly directed at him, since Ellie had already asked earlier if Claudia was alright.
“I’m all right,” Joel answered, looking anywhere but at Ellie as he struggled, “Are you…all right?”
“Yeah,” Ellie mumbled quickly.
The Pessoa woman looked at the man from the South. She could see his clear discomfort and knew exactly why. She understood why.
“Thing is, I didn’t hear that guy comin’,” he sighed.
“I didn't either,” Claudia added quickly afterward, because she felt she was also responsible for it and didn’t want Joel to be the only one having to admit it.
The man looked at her with serious eyes, but they softened quickly. His gaze shifted to her stomach. “You were injured and caught up in your pain. That’s justified. I wasn’t.”
The brunette just looked at him. Even though she knew he was being sincere, it still didn’t feel fair to her that he was taking all the blame. Claudia had been injured before, and she had always had to stay alert while still dealing with danger. But of course, there had also been moments where she couldn’t escape on her own while hurt. Not necessarily with people who happened to find her and save her—far from a rescue. Her own mind had been the greatest danger lurking in the background.
Joel turned back to Ellie, “You shouldn’t have had to…you know.”
“Well, you’re glad I did, right?” Ellie asked.
That made Claudia glance at Ellie again, her expression dripping with guilt. She immediately thought of Samuel. She had never wanted him to go through situations like this, where she had gambled with her son’s innocence. During the years after they came to the United States, they hadn’t had to deal with crime or the kind of pursuit that had marked their lives in South America, even though the Pessoa woman had always lived in a state of alertness, expecting something to happen. But nothing had. Within two years in Ironwood, they had built their system, and for a while, they lived like normal people.
But when the outbreak happened, that life wasn’t something confined to their past anymore. It spread everywhere, and no matter how young Samuel was, the world didn’t look at it that way.
But Samuel Felix was brave. He had been too young at the time to understand what had happened in his homeland, but later, as he grew older, he naturally had the right to know who his father was—and why he lived the way he did with his mother.
For Claudia, as a mother, it was incredibly difficult to explain everything in detail. She didn’t want to damage her child’s mental wellbeing. It hurt her deeply that Samuel had grown up without his father, and that he had been so small when he should have known who his uncle was, who his grandmother and grandfather were.
The Pessoa-woman did show her son pictures of their family. Somewhere early in the outbreak, when he was living with his mother in the QZ and growing older, he began asking more questions. Claudia always kept her answers brief whenever he brought it up. But he had the right the know what happened.
In truth, she didn’t even need to tell him what had happened. Samuel already understood. He understood it because his mother always went quiet whenever he brought up the subject.
“Mamá, ¿mi papá fue asesinado?” — "Mama, is papa killed?"
The woman couldn’t suppress her slight shock when she heard the question and saw her son looking at her seriously. She looked down with a sad expression.
“¿La abuela y el abuelo también? ¿Y el tío?” — "Grandma and granddad too? And uncle?
The questions kept coming until Claudia gave a slight nod and looked away. She couldn’t hold it in anymore. She also knew there would come a day when the boy would start asking questions—who wouldn’t?
But even though she expected this, the Felix-boy did something she hadn’t anticipated when this moment came.
He took his mother’s hand and looked her straight in the eyes with a tender yet serious expression.
“Abuelo, el tío y papá tenían el papel de protegerte del mal. Pero ahora yo tomo ese lugar, y es mi tarea protegerte, mamá.” — “Grandfather, uncle, and dad had the role of protecting you from evil. But now I’m taking that over, and it’s my job to protect you, Mama.”
The statement made Claudia emotional, and a single tear rolled down her cheek. This eight-year-old boy was something else. He was mentally far older than his actual age. They hugged each other, and in that moment, she confirmed that they would continue their journey through the apocalypse together—at that moment.
“Thing is, you’re just a kid,” Joel begun, “You shouldn’t know what it means to…” he try to find the right words, “It’s not like you killed him. But shootin’ or…” he sighed, “I know what it’s like, first time that you, uh, hurt someone like that.”
Claudia looked at Joel and his awkward confession. She didn’t blame him. What could they even say in a situation like this? It was something irreversible, something they all had to learn to live with. It had always been that way.
“If you, uh,” Joel tried, stuttering on consonants after, “I’m not good at this.”
“Yeah,” Ellie numbly agreed, “You really aren’t.”
“I mean it was my fault,” Joel rushed out, “You shouldn’t have had to,” he made sure to look in Ellie’s eyes, “And I’m sorry.”
"I am too," Claudia added.
Tears welled up in the girl’s eyes at the adults’ mutual confessions. She quickly wiped them away with her sleeve and they kept watching. An apology for something like that of course doesn’t make it better. Never.
“It wasn’t my first time,” Ellie confesses.
Claudia stared absentmindedly in the teenager’s direction. She wasn’t too shocked by her confession. She knew very well what it meant to come fresh from heaven and suddenly find blood on your hands.
Joel looked at the Williams-girl as she made her confession. A few seconds later, he stood up and walked over to her, then crouched down beside her. He took the pistol she had used to save him, checked it, and unloaded it. Then he handed it back to her.
“Show me your grip,” he said, “Finger off the trigger.”
Ellie held up the gun and did what he instructed.
“Now who taught you that?” Joel asked.
“FEDRA school,” she answered.
“Figures,” he muttered, He maneuvered Ellie’s fingers, “Your thumb over your thumb. Left hand squeezes down on the right.”
Claudia watched the two with mild amusement, her knees still pulled up against her chest and her arms wrapped around them. She could see that the girl was genuinely looking forward to finally learning how to use a weapon.
Speaking of that, Samuel had been just as eager in that regard. Only eight years old, and already reaching for the weapon that lay behind his mother’s pillow. She had placed it there one day and never made a point of it or kept it constantly in his sight, because Claudia didn’t want her son to have anything to do with the life his grandfather or uncle had been involved in.
But then Claudia did get the idea that day when she saw the weapon with him, shocked and upset. It was because of what was written behind the photo from when Samuel was born.
Na noite em que você nasceu, coloquei uma arma debaixo do seu travesseiro para te proteger.
Mas saiba que sua arma mais forte sempre será o seu coração. —
On the night you were born, I placed a gun under your pillow to protect you.
But know this: your strongest weapon will always be your heart.
Seu avô, Emilio Pessoa — You're grandfather, Emilio Pessoa
The Pessoa-woman closed her eyes in frustration as she read it. It made her nervous and filled her with intense anger because of her father’s ignorance. She hated his cunning, criminal actions and the fact that he wanted to involve his grandson in it as well. Her concern had always been whether she could raise a son without him getting caught up in that nonsense of the underworld.
But since 2013, those worries have been nothing but hollow. If you open it like that, there’s nothing there. So Claudia accepted it and knew she had to teach her son how to survive.
“There you go,” Joel sat back, “Look it.”
He tugged on the gun, trying to pull the gun from Ellie’s grip, but it held. She giggled as he yanked her forward.
“Okay?” Joel said sternly.
Ellie nodded and slightly smiled.
Joel loaded the cartridge back into the weapon and safely handed it back to Ellie, who went to stuff it in her pocket.
“Uh-uh,” Joel shook his head, “You put it in your pack. You’ll shoot your damn ass off.”
Claudia pursed her lips as she let out a faint snort and looked away, amused, trying to keep herself from giving in to laughter at the smuggler’s remark.
Although Joel noticed a hint at that moment, he said nothing about it. He held out his hand to the woman, and she immediately took it. He pulled her up to her feet. Then he headed toward the door, and Claudia followed him.
Joel was looking at Ellie. Claudia looked from Joel to Ellie.
“We’re gonna be okay,” he said.
“I know,” Ellie muttered.
Claudia then looked back at Joel, bringing them face to face. They looked at each other for a moment, and then she nodded, confirming that they were ready to continue.
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Night had fallen, making it a bit harder for them to quickly reach the destination they were heading toward, slowing them down slightly. But eventually, they arrived at an apartment building where there was only one possible entrance to get inside.
Joel, Ellie and Claudia stared up at the vent that would grant them access to unlock the door.
The woman looked down at the teenager, immediately thinking she could get through there. But because of her abdominal wound, she didn’t want to strain herself too much, so she looked at the smuggler, who was already looking back at her, "Joel, can you give her a boost?”
"Yeah," he muttered and stepped forward and Ellie came closer to him.
Joel bent down, locking his hands together. “You’re just gonna put your foot there,” he instructed.
“One, two,” Joel counted before lifting Ellie up.
“Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit,” the girl said, panicked. Claudia quickly ran over to her to steady her hips.
“Straighten up,” Joel directed, “I got you.”
The brunette then let go, trusting that the smuggler had the girl in good hands. Ellie successfully made her way inside, striking the wooden plank against the grate until it fell onto the floor on the other side.
“Okay, I’m in,” Ellie called.
“Take a look around first,” Joel told her, “Ellie!”
"Goddamnit," he muttered and then looking at Claudia, "C'mon."
The door swung open when Ellie welcomed them, “Where would you be without me, huh?”
“By now, Wyoming,” Joel replied as he and Claudia walked through.
“Oh, yeah,” Ellie admitted, “Walked into that one.”
Inside, it was as dark as expected, and Joel and Ellie had their flashlights on hand. Claudia didn’t, but the two beams were enough. She was completely exhausted and in need of a good night’s sleep.
“All right, we’ll make our way up,” Joel laid out the plan, “And come morning, I’ll take a look at the city and find our way out.”
Trying to be useful instead of just acting like a wounded animal, the woman stepped forward and opened the door that led to the stairwell.
Joel and Ellie come with their flashlights behind her.
“We’re going up 42 flights?” Ellie asked.
“45,” Joel answered, flicking the light upward to reveal the dauntingly tall structure, “But no, not all the way.”
"How far then?" Claudia asked.
“As far as I can make it.”
Claudia sighed, uninterested. She really wasn’t in the mood—but it was all for the sake of safety.
After a few more flights of stairs, the two adults were already sighing from exhaustion. Claudia normally had good stamina—if it weren’t for her injury today. On days like these, staying fit in the apocalypse was a luxury you had to maintain if you wanted to survive and keep aging at bay. Unlike Joel...
He had, of course, reached his age. Claudia had the feeling he was a bit older than her, but not so much that there was a huge generational gap between them. She was now in her middle years as well, but even when she had been a teenager, she had never felt like a young lady. Never. People had always said that about her too.
Back when she was married at fifteen, people in the neighborhood even talked about it as if it were something appropriate for her. Harsh, insensitive talk about a girl who had been forced into that kind of life through ignorance and poverty.
You don’t choose the family you’re born into. The country. The environment you grow up in. That’s what makes us who we are—what has brought us to where we are today, shaped by where we’ve been and what we’ve gone through.
“Hey, you know that guy who said he was hurt?” Ellie asked suddenly, “How did you guys know it was an ambush?”
That made Joel and Claudia pause for a moment. Joel looked over at the teenager who had asked the question.
The smuggler then glanced for a split second at the Pessoa woman, who simply looked back at him, waiting for his answer. He met her gaze with a meaningful look, unsure why a sense of expectation was rising in him.
“I’ve been on both sides,” he admitted, “It was a long time ago, we did what we needed to survive.”
“You and Tess?” Ellie asked.
“And the people we were with,” Joel continued, “My brother, too.”
Claudia looked at him with a dead-serious expression, though not one of surprise or shock. She already knew about this. His brother Tommy had told her about his earlier life as a hunter. He was an honest man—but he had never mentioned Joel. Only that he had been with a group, alongside his brother, and that they had done those things to survive and judge others.
The younger Miller brother felt comfortable and at ease speaking about everything with the woman. He knew she wouldn’t judge him. From the moment they had met, Claudia had carried that kind of aura around her.
So much so that he had even explained to her what happened when he left that life behind. He told her that he had turned his back on his own bloodline—his own brother—because he could no longer tolerate Joel’s methods and had simply had enough.
It had led to a massive argument that nearly turned physical, but before things could escalate further, Tommy walked away. Still, he had been deeply shaken by leaving his older brother behind, and he couldn’t deny that, even after everything, he still cared about him.
But at that moment, there had been no other choice. So he decided to join the Fireflies, wanting to do what he had always meant to do. Always try do the right thing, if it doesn't, don't do it. Don't let the world spoil you.
But this world spoils you, even if you don't want to.
Claudia felt empathy for both brothers. She understood Tommy’s position very well. Joel had been incredibly harsh in forcing him into that life, and then, when he rebelled, taking it out on him afterward. But still, it never crossed her mind to judge the older Miller brother for it.
This was a world that could drive anyone to the edge. She certainly didn’t have the right to judge anyone—not on any level. Everyone had to look at themselves first.
Claudia was someone who always analyzed everything deeply and tried her best to take responsibility for her actions. Even if it took her ten years to realize something, she would still go after it to make peace with it. However, her biggest shadow was that she was someone who had spent years struggling with herself, constantly in conflict with her own.
That was even worse. Because when it’s someone else, you can shut them down, push them away, or even kill them if it comes to that. But this was herself.
“Did you kill innocent people?”
The teenager’s second question came out quickly, and before she could even respond, the brunette froze. Joel glanced back again, absentmindedly, and this time he didn’t catch Claudia looking at him the way he had looked at her. He hated talking about his former life as a hunter—that much was clear.
The woman hadn’t said a word. Not that he expected her to, but for some reason, that same sense of expectation crept up on him again.
Claudia’s biggest fear—if you could even call it that—was ending up like her father. He had made so many enemies for himself that he could no longer keep up, forcing him to take extreme measures to “protect” his family. And in doing so, he had ended up ruining the lives of the very people he claimed to care about.
Because someone who truly cares about their family doesn’t make choices like that.
Yet she could never deny that she still loved him, regardless of what he had done and what it had caused. He set his family on fire—along with himself.
For Claudia, it had always been difficult to deal with that emotion—the fact that she could feel anger toward her father while still loving him at the same time.
She felt furious toward all the loved ones she had lost. It sounded foolish, but that was how it was.
“C’mon,” he said to Ellie, ignoring the question and continues walking.
They continued climbing the stairs for a while longer, until they finally reached one of the highest floors.
“Holy shit,” Ellie breathed, but still in a good state in contrast to Claudia and Joel.
Joel backed up against the wall, sliding down to the floor in exhaustion. “Yeah.”
“Thirty three floors,” Ellie continued cheerily, “That’s good.”
“It’s gonna have to be,” Joel panted.
Claudia also tried to catch her breath, her hand instinctively moving to her abdominal wound. The painkillers should have kicked in by now, since a few hours had passed, but exhaustion made her feel a faint sting in her stomach. It would be fine.
"Does it hurt?" Ellie asked.
Claudia looked up at the teenager who looked at her. “Not too bad. It’s just because of this…”, she gestured to the action they do.
Ellie nodded and walked over Joel, extended a hand to him, “Come on.”
Claudia looked at Ellie, then at Joel, raising her eyebrows. The older man gave the girl an offended look, then shifted his gaze to the woman. He rolled his eyes and took the hand that was offered to him to pull himself up.
“Lazy ass,” he grumbled, walking past both girls, “Fifty two years old, you little shit.”
Now Claudia finally got confirmation of his age—something she had already suspected, maybe around ten years older than her. Yet in his mindset, he sometimes felt younger. Much younger…
Without realizing it, she let her thoughts slip too openly, and the words came out a bit sharper than intended, “Just what I thought…”
Joel looked at the woman with his familiar Miller-frown and narrowed eyes, “What did you say?”
Ellie looked over as well, and Claudia met Joel’s gaze seriously, “Nothing.”
That didn’t convince him, and he raised an eyebrow.
Claudia rolled her eyes at his curiosity, “I just said I expected you to be this age,” she admitted, then added with a sarcastic edge to tease him a little, “and that you’ve definitely earned the right to complain as much as you do.”
“You know,” he began, “the fact your hair is still that dark isn’t exactly a sign of youth. I'm sure we don’t have that much of an age gap anyway."
The brunette gave him a slightly offended look, while Ellie behind her tried to hide her laughter by covering her mouth with her hand and looking away.
“I’m forty-two, Joel, thanks for reminding me.”
And then Claudia walked past him, and he watched as she pushed her loose, dark hair back with her hand. He shook his head and grinned in amusement before following after her, with Ellie trailing behind them.
Joel couldn’t deny that he couldn’t quite pin down the woman’s exact age. Her mindset and appearance confused him, making it hard to figure her out. But even if she looked youthful, he could still see a trace of exhaustion beneath it all. He could see right through it.
Joel grabbed a fire extinguisher from the wall and rammed it into the glass door of one of the apartments. He let Claudia and Ellie in first before entering himself.
“Oh, finally,” Claudia said with relief.
Joel pulled out a drawer form one of the cabinets, carefully collecting the glass shards he’d created and shaking them across the floor. Claudia helped Ellie to make their beds at that time.
“Joel,” Ellie called, confused as to what she was watching. He didn’t reply. “Joel…”
Claudia spoke up, “Joel.”
He turned quickly, “What?”
“What are you doing?” Ellie asked.
“I don’t want someone sneakin’ up on us while we’re sleepin’,” he explained.
Claudia nodded, more to herself than anyone else. It made sense—solid, practical, a good plan.
“Oh,” Ellie elongated, “I get it. Crunch, crunch, crunch. Are you sure you’re gonna hear it?”
“Of course I’ll hear it,” Joel replied, slightly offended, “That’s the damn point.”
“Okay,” Ellie said, laying down on her couch cushion bed.
Claudia got up from beside Ellie and went to the back, retrieving one of the beds. She placed it in the middle, near the wall where she would be leaning, then took off her jacket and stuffed it into a makeshift pillow.
“Well, goodnight,” Ellie said, comfortably curled up in a ball.
“Yeah, goodnight,” Joel grunted.
Everyone tried to settle in and prepare for sleep after a long, exhausting day, until Joel’s voice broke the quiet again.
“When we were talkin’ about hurtin’ people,” he recalled, “What did you mean it wasn’t your first time?”
The girl froze for a moment at the question, then rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling, her tone growing more somber, "I don't wanna talk about it."
The Pessoa-woman simply listened to the conversation, too tired to say anything. But she could sense Ellie’s instinct—how she felt. It was an overwhelming responsibility to carry at such a young age.
Joel glanced back at the teenager’s answer and immediately showed understanding of her choice, “All right.”
Then he turned around so he could face Ellie. “You don’t have to,” he continued, “Just sayin’…it isn’t fair, your age…havin’ to deal with all this.”
Ellie turned her head to face the adults, “So it gets easier when you get older?”
"No," Claudia answered this time, making Ellie lift her head a little up to face the women, "it doesn't."
“The reason I asked whether you’d hear the glass or not,” Ellie flipped over to face Joel , “Is ‘cause I’ve noticed you don’t hear too well from your right side. Is it cause you were shot there?”
It was about that scar on his temple again. Not that it was impossible for someone’s hearing to be damaged, but still, Claudia always found the older man a bit mysterious whenever that subject came up. Not that she would push him on it. She never asked people questions like that—not so easily, anyway.
“Probably more from shootin’,” Joel answered, swallowing hard in a way he give the women a hint that she could be probably right about his mysterious acting. He turned back over on his side, “So if you wanna keep your hearin’, you stick to that knife.”
The Pessoa woman looked up at the ceiling, her brow faintly furrowing in confusion at Joel’s explanation. Her hearing was still perfectly fine after more than twenty-seven years of using weapons. Shooting in overly enclosed spaces could of course damage hearing, but they were speaking in general terms now.
Rather than trying to analyze the situation any further, she closed her eyes.
“Joel?” Ellie spoke up again, “Claudia?”
They answered at the same time, “Hm?”
“Did you know diarrhea is hereditary?”
"What?" Joel turned slightly his neck and Claudia was looking to at the teenager who looked between the two adults.
“Yeah,” Ellie replied, “It runs in your jeans.”
The smuggler rolled onto his back again to look at Ellie, confused. Claudia also looked puzzled, then turned away to suppress a laugh, exhaling softly as her eyes showed faint amusement. Unfortunately, she failed to hide it when the next words slipped out,
"¿Qué carajos.." — "What the fuck.."
The women smacked her hand to her forehead while she's smiling awkwardly and shaking her head.
"Jesus," mumbled Joel while turning his back to her but his snickering was noticed by the two girls, "that is so goddamn stupid."
“You laughed, motherfucker,” Ellie giggled.
“I didn’t laugh,” Joel shot back.
“Yes, you did,” Ellie replied.
“You’re losin’ it big time,” Ellie grinned.
A few seconds later, the Pessoa-woman couldn’t hold it in any longer and burst out laughing, placing a hand on her chest.
At that moment, hearing Claudia’s voice, Joel let himself go as well. After such a long day filled with so many events, this was the last situation the two adults ever expected to find themselves in. That kid was going to be the death of them.
"Go to sleep," said Joel, but his voice betrayed him when a laugh slipped out at the command.
“You go to sleep,” Ellie laughed, rolling on her bed.
Claudia let out another soft laugh as she stared at the ceiling, her hand still resting on her chest—right over her heart. For the first time in so many years, the moment felt real. Not forced. Not fake. Not complex. Not borderline. Not like a whiplash. Just real—inside and out.
A single tear slipped from her eye and rolled down her cheek while she still stared with a full smile, drifting into the night with pure joy in her soul.
For once in so many years, she closed her eyes without the feeling that things would come back to haunt her in her sleep. For the first time in a long while, she would sleep in peace...
