The World's Strongest Poster

you sit down at the plastic table because your partner likes being outside at the bar even though it’s 90 degrees and 60% humidity at 10pm and you thought this corduroy dress was soooo cute but now youre all sweaty and so one of your balls has escaped your panties but youre wearing fishnets so your loose nut is now dying like a sea turtle in a six pack ring and youre the desperate diver trying to save it but blind and one handed and stone faced cause you can’t draw attention to the fact that youre doing a high stakes wildlife rescue on your stupid scrotum in public because it might turn into a six month news cycle and desantis might fly out to personally bulldoze the bar. and its a thursday

they should make a version of lying thats okay to do and no one will get mad at you for

parents will be like “you’ve changed” and it’s just you started doing the things that make you comfortable that you always wanted to do but was too scared to express your wants and needs

The slow realization that they have been loved not like a child, but as a trophy. But it was love nonetheless. Wasn't it?

was gonna write a post about the awesome age gap between beat and rest but i just checked the wiki and rest is apparently only 29??? so now i'm more interested in the age gap between rest and eve. rest milf hunter??? then rest got eve's kid so now beat is the milf hunter????

forgot 30 is a normal age to have a kid

in this economy though?

ooh yeah i can feel it now. i'm roxie! oh this is wicked. being aware of it is so wild. i wanna eat something

HEY

you'd think being plural would make selfcest hotter but honestly i don't even like these freaks

u know uve reached peak blorbo understanding when you sound like a hater to the stans and like a stan to the haters