this is entirely too bright but i am in the mood to type and i am unsure of what to write.  just opening up notes and typing even this intro has helped a little bit. writing always made me feel better. even if it does feel cringy and embarassing.  i'm not sure why i think all of my interests are lame and boring.  maybe they are. i guess i like them and that is what matters. i feel bad because i'm not an exciting person.  my idea of a perfect day is listening to asmr and playing minecraft. i don't mind sitting in silence for long periods of time.  i view napping as an activity. smoking weed is my pasttime.  i feel like i put myself off as a very adventerous person, with a big personality and lots of cool interests, but in reality i'm a homebody that gets an anxiety stomachache from leaving Sequim. I listen to the same albums on repeat, i'm too tired and unmotivated to make art,, i'm beginning to question exactly how much i have let myself rot. not even let myself. i just feel this tired ache in my chest that won't leave, constantly itching in my weary and dried out eyes.  i feel like my brain and body is falling apart.