Well my guys, gals, and non binary palsāas a lot of you already know I got caught two weeks ago. At Ulta, of all places šI told y'all I was gonna give it 8 days to be paranoid and those have come and gone so now Iām moving on. But it is now my solemn duty to make this post for y'all, as many other lifters have before me, to hopefully keep this from happening to you.
Well, hereās what I Did Wrong:
ā¢ I felt āoffā from the beginning. The little Ulta spree with my friend was something we planned on doing for weeks, and we decided on a Thursday, but on the day of came down with the flu. Probably the universe tryna tell me not to go but my stubborn ass really wanted a that Peach Palette. On the weekend leading up to Monday I felt āoffā. I was no longer sick but I could sense something was wrong in my gut. All experienced lifters will tell you, time and time againāTRUST YOUR GUT. Cut your losses boo! That highlighter aināt worth it!
ā¢ I went with a newbie. Iād gone with this guy before and it was a disaster but we didnāt get caught, and I figured since heād been exposed already it wouldnāt be as bad the second time around. It was his idea to go this time and everything! So I said, Sure, Letās Do It. (Stupid) Thing is heās a total weenie. I knew this. It was the reason he brought me along to begin withāhe didnāt have the stomach to actually lift things himself so he needed me for that. In return heād give me a ride, shield me from the cameras, etc. If you read my post about my experience you already know how this ended, but if you havenāt Iāll just tell you: He totally abandoned me. I was about half way through concealing when he about had a panic attack at the store and just WALKED OUT, LEAVING ME TO FEND FOR MYSELF. That in itself isnāt so bad, but heād caused such a seen that the SAs were looking at me now, and I couldnāt seem to shake them. But the worst part is that he left me. He totally justā¦ drove away. I already knew he was a wimp, but I never in my wildest dreams imagined he was that weak. Moral of the story is donāt give newbies the benefit of the doubt. If you can already sense that they donāt have what it takes from the beginning chances are when things get real theyāll crack, and theyāll act to save themselves.
ā¢ I got greedy. With the added assistance I got a little bit too comfortable and loaded up. Usually I only get enough to fill up my bag but I got twice as much this time around, at least. My strategy was to conceal in my purse, go to the bathrooms to empty out the bag and move the items so theyāre concealed on my body, get back out to the floor and use the free bag space for the rest of the merchandise. If itād settled for the things Iād concealed on my body and left then, we could have been in and out without incident. I think the SA was suspicious from the beginning tbh, so I think if Iād done this she would have checked the cameras after we left and maybe put up my picture in the back if they saw me conceal on camera. Iām pretty sure I only concealed in blind spots, but itās kind of a blur at this point I canāt even be sure.
ā¢ Along those lines, I abandoned the cotton ball method. For those of you that are not familiar with the cotton ball method hereās what you do
- you walk into Ulta
- you get yourself a tote
- you grab a couple of bags of cotton balls
- you browse around the store, subtly slipping the items you want behind the cotton balls in your bag, so the SAs can never say they saw said item in your possession
- conceal in a blind spot
- buy the cotton balls, if the store is empty. If theyāre too busy to notice me I just put them back and leave
(I DID NOT COME UP WITH THIS METHOD!!!! I LEARNED THIS FROM ANOTHER LIFTER ON HERE I DONT REMEMBER WHO)
ā¦anyway so this time I didnāt do that. I just straight up put the things I wanted in the tote for the whole world and God to see. (Stupid) The first time I remember the SA notice me was when she glanced at all the eyeliners in my tote, and asked me if Iād like for her to take it to the front. Now, if you know anything, you know this is a HUGE red flag!! And because Iām not a /total imbecile I decided to swallow my pride and try to get tf out of there.
ā¢ This is more storytelling than an actual point but read it anyway. So at this point I decide Iām just gonna dump and leave. But itās too late. The SA has taken to āāāsubtletyāāāā following me around, like āoh what s coincidence youāre here, at the very section I have to stock this shit, of fiddle with the displays lolā š Bitch you aināt slick. But neither am I, apparently. So once Iām in front of the UD eyeliners wanting to put them all back, I realize I canāt do that with her literally right next to me without practically waving a big red flag that says āHEY!!! IM STEALING!!!ā so I start thinking Iām just gonna have to man up and buy something just to get her off my back. I make up some bullshit story about a little sister who I wanted to her a whole collection of eyeliners for, ābut I read the prices on these eyeliners wrong, i thought they were cheaperā. At which point she leads me to the NYX eyeliners which are, admittedly, a whole lot cheaper but Iām still broke af. So Iām sweating and weighing my options here and while I try to decide on a plan of action Iām stalling her/buying time by sending her to the front to ring up the cheap eyeliners but always came back 2 seconds later to hover over my shoulder. Around the 3rd time I do this I think she caught onā¦ pt.1
ā¢ pt. 2/ OMFG so hereās what happens next: remember how I told you Iād concealed a shit ton of stuff on myself? Well while Iām looking at the nyx eyeliners, completely by coincidence, some random highlighter (I think?) falls from the display and my dumb ass bends down to pick it up. When you have 10 peach lip glosses stuffed in your pockets and 5 palettes tucked into the waistband of ya jeans youāre gonna look a little funny if youāre bending. I turn to hand her the highlighter and she asks āis there something in your pockets?ā
ā¢ OKAY HEREāS AN ACTUAL POINT. I LET HER LOOK IN MY BAG. DONāT DO THAT. SAY NO. So she asks if thereās something in my pockets and I reach in and pull out a lip gloss and go āoh Iām sorry I think I accidentally put this in my pocketā but sheās not buying it AT ALL. I didnāt think she would but I figured why not try lmao. Then she asks if I have anything in my bag (I did), to which I say no but my dumb ass letās her look in anyway. And she goes, mhhhhhhmm. Thatās when the older SA comes up to us and asks whatās going on. This bitch holds up that dumb highlighter and says āThis fell out of her pockets so I looked in her bag and she has a ton of stuff in there!ā
- the highlighter fell off the display Not my pocket. But she was already suspicious and probably was just looking for an excuse to look in my bag/pockets anyway.
- there were like TWO highlighters in there, the fuck? Not a ton of stuff at all, that she could see anyway. š
ā¢ So then the senior SA says āalright im gonna need you to come up to the front and empty out your bagā so I follow her and she goes behind the register. And I make the decision real which that I aināt gonna risk getting the cops called on my ass. Iām just not. I canāt pay for the things in my bag and this adrenaline gonna wear off REAL SOON, so itās now or never.
Which leads me to the Things I Did Right:
ā¢ I ran. I do not regret running in the least bit, it was probably my best shot tbh. The SA goes behind the counter and we literally RIGHT NEXT to the door so I just book it. In hindsight I should have dumped the things I had in my bag and then ran but I wasnāt thinking about that š they didnāt chase, but the senior SA called to the other girl to called the cops so I REALLY panic. I run around the parking lot trying to find my friend (fully aware that the SA was watching from the door waiting to write down the plate number of whatever car I get into) and Iām slowly coming to the realization that this bitch fucking drove away. I am furious, and I am running out of time and options. So I pull out my phone and Iām trying to get ahold of this guy while Iām literally SPRINTING to the McDonaldās across the street šhe finally picks up and I am yelling at him, probably causing a scene in the McDonaldās parking lot, demanding he pick me up.
ā¢ alright so it was pretty shitty of him to leave me, yes, but itās ironically the best thing that could have happened. The SA didnāt see the car he was driving, the plates, OR HIM! Side note: the whole reason I was paranoid for a week after this whole thing was because he made a hair appointment with them when we went in the store, so they had all his info. So if they didnāt see him driving, he drove separately, etc. they couldnāt actually prove he was involved or knew anything. Or if they did then they plainly saw that he abandoned me šso that might tell whoever investigated that he didnāt want anything to do with it, left as soon as he saw I was lifting, etc.
ā¢ I concealed on myself! That was actually so smart to do because even though she checked my pockets and purse she didnāt do a pat down or anything so she didnāt know the full extent of the shit I got. If she had Iād probably have been in a lot more trouble tbh.
ā¢ I wore a big jacket over my spirit wear! The thing that got those football players from my school caught for shoplifting last year was that they literally wore shirts with our school name on them. The police were able to just show up at our school and be like āHey who dis? Coolā since then I always make it a point not to wear anything that could lead back to me. I was wearing a club shirt that day (stupid) but I was smart enough to put a big ol jacket over it, and keep it on the entire time.
Well thatās my tale. In case you didnāt wanna read all that Shit hereās the high points:
Trust your gut. Donāt go with a newbie. Donāt get greedy. If they ask to look in your bag, always say ānoā. Conceal on yourself whenever possible. ALWAYS conceal in blind spots. Know the store policies, because in some cases youāre better off running, in some cases youāre better off cooperating. Donāt give the store any of your info. If youāre buying, pay with cash. Donāt wear spirit wear.
titsay
romaincrisis
stormborns
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