take this time (tick-tick) time out

Unless they're black

"men make more than women in jobs"

Black men make less than white women on average

"men don't get followed around by people who mean them harm"

Black men are heavily policed and regularly jumped and killed for just walking down the street

"no one tells a man what he can and cannot do with his own body"

Black men are repeatedly assaulted and have their hair forcibly shaved or cut for wearing their hair natural and in culturally important styles. Black men who choose body modifications like tattoos or piercings are branded as thugs. Black men who have children and black men who don't have children are both regarded as players, hounddogs, absent fathers, and baby daddies, as if the logical answer is that no one's first choice of partner and father of their children would ever be a black man.

"no one judges a man's worth based on his clothes"/"a man isn't ever in danger no matter what he wears"

Black men are required to look presentable and professional according to eurocentric standards, push themselves into clothes not made for their bodies, and be highly uncomfortable in their daily lives or else risk 'fitting the profile' or 'matching the description' and getting detained by police AT BEST for the crime of existing in public. Black men wearing comfortable clothes are seen as sloppy, thugs, gangsters, street rats, hood and ghetto.

"no man fears rape"

The rape and sexual assault of black men ties directly to black buck stereotypes and black fetishization to the point where liking a black person or having your dating pool be open to black people is treated like a sexuality much like being gay. People are both threatened by and aroused by our bodies and that leads them to perform extreme acts of violence on us, including rape, SA, coercion, trafficking, and more. Much like how "tranny" and "lesbian" is a porn category, so is Big Black Cock. Sometimes with us featured as the rapist. Sometimes with us featured as the victim. Almost never with us featured as intimate, passionate, loving, tender. Black men are either to be feared and reviled, or to be broken and forced to submit. Direct ties to slavery with white people still getting off to our suffering.

Just say you don't care as much about black people's suffering and go, jesus.

Both of my parents worked in education. My white (passing) mother was a special ed teacher in a middle school. My father was her district's administrator. She was paid more than him. Significantly. They both have Master's Degrees.

My nephew was 13 when Trayvon Martin was killed. His mother asked him to please make sure he came home before the streetlights came on, and if he couldn't make it to not wear a hoodie and certainly don't wear it up. No matter how cold.

My nephew and my father were both pinned down and had their afros shaved/ruined by teachers, people they should have been able to trust. My nephew, my cousins, and more than one of my uncles have had the same happen to their locs. When my mother became pregnant very early in my parents' marriage, no one believed that she actually *wanted* to marry my dad but that she'd accidentally become pregnant and married him to not be ashamed. When my parents adopted my sister who is much darker skinned than my other sister or myself, the assumption was that she was a child from one of dad's previous marriages (he's only ever been married to one woman: my mom) and that my sister was only there because of a custody battle. The first time my dad came to pick me up from school, the office refused to let him in the building and called the police on him for trying to abduct me, because everyone knew my mom was white and the logical conclusion of a black man picking up his black/mixed kid from school was that he was a kidnapper and not that he was my fucking father.

My father arrived home late one night after flying in from Japan and was understandably in comfortable clothes after being exclusively in suits in Japan in the middle of summer for 6 months. Our neighbor saw him pull into the driveway, let himself in the back door... and called the police saying a black man in a hoodie was breaking into our house. We'd lived there at that point for more than a decade. My nephew and I have been followed around in stores for wearing beaters and basketball shorts in the middle of summer. My cousin was harassed by cops while sitting at the bus stop because he had his hood up and was listening to music on his ipod. My uncle was cornered by airport security and ended up missing his flight because someone gave a 'tip' that he 'looked suspicious' in his jeans and a t-shirt.

Every single one of my older black relatives, male and female, have been raped. Every single one. Some of the younger ones too.

This is the post that netted me my "reputation" for saying that black women have it better than black men or that black women caused these problems.

This post was made in specifically because of radfem talking points, in direct response to a radfem post I saw and was mad about. Two years later I am seeing white radfems say the same about F1nn5ter. My response is still the same. A: trans women aren't men, B: that's not even true of cis men because marginalized cis men experience all of these things on a regular basis.

No where in this post does this blame black women for anything or say that black women don't experience this- in fact I specifically mention black butches in multiple reblogs and in other posts discussing this exact topic. Black women are frequently forcibly degendered and masculinized, and God forbid a black woman actually be GNC and masculine or transgender because then her risk of violence to be enacted upon her is at an absurd height.

Anyway when I bring up these points with this post, this is the sort of attitude I'm talking about. ALL of these are from a recent post where I am talking about my specific experience as a black trans man and ALL of these are nonblack people taking it upon themselves to give lip service to acknowledging black people are oppressed and then IMMEDIATELY following up with not including black men in their idea of what counts as oppressed.

When I say white radical feminism leaves racially marginalized men out of discussions of their own oppression, this is what I'm talking about.

This was from a post where I said people talk over me frequently and tell me my voice as a black person doesn't matter and I was taught not to tolerate it as a girl and I'm certainly not going to start tolerating it as a man. That people have regarded my presence as a black person as a threat just existing in an area my entire life and I didn't think it was a good thing when I was a black girl and I still don't think it's a good thing as a black man. This was a post about antiblack racism and how it affects me, an entire ass black trans man.

And nonblack people STILL sought to completely erase my perspective off my own post.

Does it hurt, when I point out your racism? Is it uncomfortable to realize that you're not innocent in spreading and perpetuating the same racism that's caused black people to die to violence at astronomical rates? Is it a hard pill to swallow?

It's kinda like saying to a lesbian "your attraction to women is privileged because cishet men are attracted to women" when, well, she's not a cishet man so she doesn't get the benefits that a cishet man gets from being attracted to women. In fact she gets oppressed.

Real shit. Had a bunch of people tell my yemeni friend he was privileged for being a 'straight man'.

ID: Tumblr tags that read "#this includes it/its users btw #idc if calling someone it/its makes you uncomfortable it's still misgendering if you call it "them"" /END ID

I knew a rapist who was an absolute ride-or-die friend to his gamer bros. Like, give the last dollar from his pocket to a friend who got a flat tire, and then turn around and go rape a Freshman that evening.

I knew a vicious child abuser who wept like a baby when her dog died.

The nastiest human being on the planet nevertheless feels obscurely melancholy sometimes, or has high spirits when they step out doors on the first warm day of spring, or has opinions on their favorite TV show and which side the toilet paper should hang on and whether or not the room should be cold or warm when you go to sleep.

We're all still just people. Complex, with fully-realized interior worlds.

None of that will save you from becoming a monster, if you decide to do monstrous things.

'i love you'