Haunted

being online is so scary aren't you guys worried about the world wide spider

It took 36 years for someone to make this joke and by god it was worth the wait

red fucking alert if you’re currently experiencing a beautiful spring day after a long and brutal winter DO NOT TRUST IT this is NOT spring it is FALSE SPRING we still have SEVERAL WEEKS OF COLD do NOT let your guard down

Southern hemisphere version: red fucking alert if you're currently experiencing a beautiful fall day after a long and brutal summer DO NOT TRUST IT this is NOT fall it is FALSE FALL we still have SEVERAL WEEKS OF HOT do NOT ler your guard down

Boy why are you so nose

A child named Shovel

for my cereal

The forklift's lesser known relative: the spoonlift.