AnasAbdin
styofa doing anything
KIROKAZE
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
PR's Tumblrdome
trying on a metaphor
titsay
JBB: An Artblog!
RMH
noise dept.
Today's Document
i don't do bad sauce passes
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Keni
oozey mess
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Andulka
Misplaced Lens Cap
Product Placement
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@vavafafadg
for Qansi/clasiqansi/: dont have any sympathetic reaction towards me, as irredeemable prick who doesnt need any sympathy and empathy at all. dont forgive me, dont ever react like this ever again. its enabling. its burying that youre hurt and violated by me that instead you fawned to me. Dont ever forgive me as you will know my actions. Please just do an retribution. as i was very sex pest towards you
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all cluster b personality disorders are considered highly egosyntonic (defined as thoughts/impulses/behaviors that are abnormal without seeming abnormal to the individual experiencing them), so it's a common misconception that people with these disorders will never seek out help/treatment.
WRONG. egosyntonic ≠ incapable of self-reflection. we probably aren't going to seek out help for something that we don't see as wrong, except society is fucking amazing at punishing mentally ill people for their differences.
most cluster b people, aware or not, will get their symptoms (usually very rudely) pointed out to them by judgemental strangers. generally that invites some self-reflection, and with that comes research.
New spaghetti Straight up from Muglel
What do you think should be studied more about pwASPD if anything?
Mental Time Travel! If anything needs to be studied, pleeeeeasssse study mental time travel!
I never had an issue with understanding the emotions or perspectives of others. I never had an issue with understanding morality. Never was where an - after any therapeutic measurement or look at an emotion wheel shard - any sort of "oops okay now I understand why it was shit to do this. Does not happen again, sorry uwu"-type of moment.
But (!), when I first time learned that something called "mental time travel" exists, it was like glass shattering. This is something people do? Automatically? Just like that? Damn, you are telling me when my mother was worried about my lack of concern for school, jobs, or a future, it was not to ridicule me? She just felt a pressing concern about it before the moment even arrived? Whaaaat???
When teachers or therapists asked me about the future, it was not just to make me gaze into an empty bottle? I was expected to have a feeling for a purely potential moment which has no reality yet? You mean, people do have an emotional experience about the here and now depending on future perspectives??? Hooooowwww???
When I heard about it, I was stunt for a moment, the next reaction of mine was "I-I cannot do that!", literally. I felt paralyzed. Yet it explained so much! So much more than any emotional sensitivity training or any attempt to make me consider the perspective of others. And it explains sooooo much. Why anxiety hits only the moment I am in trouble, why I do not feel fear about past troubles, why I have little to no coherent long-term plans but only step by step stairs upwards if anything. Why I fail to appreciate the emotions of others if not consciously thought about it! Why I need to constantly meet my friends again before the fire burns out!
I was lucky to discuss this issue with a few pwASPD, including some awesome Users I met on Tumblr since I started my blog. And those where I have genuine reason to believe they are suffering from ASPD - like me, with a childhood onset nonetheless - had the same reaction! Even better, like me, when confronting their peers, none of them was surprised by the ability to do "mental time traveling". It was like given to them! As if it is anormal thing to do! Only those with (childhood onset) ASPD could not do that! We could not even imagine it!
Maybe a little stretch, but I have the suspicion that the idea of free-will, is not just a theological made-up because blaming and demonizing people is "cool" and "trendy" within the current political climate, but actually an everyday experience for most people! Like, they never needed to explain what free-will is, and no philosopher never needed to ground that axiom, not because of religious or cultural indoctrination, but because most people are confronted with different possible outcomes and a future emotional state in everyday life situations. However, when you cannot do mental time travel, or it is severely impeded, you may also experience your actions as immediate reactions, not as a careful evaluation, let alone "free-will".
I, and at least some people with childhood onset ASPD - I seriously do not know if it is for all forms of ASPD - do not do that. We do not experience an emotional state for a potential future state or a past state. It is only the presence and the immediate events we can comprehend and react to. This could also explain a lot of impulsivity issues we have, if not all of the factor 2 traits while also explaining factor 1 traits in the psychopathy construct. If you are stuck with your emotions in the presence, how are you supposed to care for a future, past, or different emotional state altogether?
This is so much more promising than trying to teach us empathy or emotions. When we investigate empathy or emotions in terms of ASPD, we are actually barking up the wrong tree. This might be a bit disappointing for all those who hoped that pwASPD are some cold hearted fearless edgy mfers who can be "trained" to "act" empathic, but reality is often disappointing. We are not "born soldiers" or people with the guts to make "harsh decisions". We are unreliable cnts who do as we please with little consideration for consequences, and now I finally understood why. Almost as if a person whom you can teach morality and emotions and then begins to act more empathic and emotional, has no genuine lack of empathy, impulsivity, or severe mental disorder at all, but is simply "just a person who didn't know better", right?
Again, understanding emotions, morality, perspectives, was never an issue for me. But applying an emotion to another moment of time or experiencing an emotion for a future or past event now in order to navigate a decision, that was something I could not even think of!
This could also be so much more helpful to adress issues pwASPD are actually suffering, which in turn increases the likelyhood for us to look for therapy, because if I ever meet a therapist who wants to teach me the emotion wheel shard, I may commit assault! But strategies, such as working in small steps each with a unique gratification, this is what helped me to stay at work. Preparing myself upfront for future incoming thoughts and feelings I do not anticipant yet, saved me some trouble. These are strategies I found for myself to navigate around the issues of having little to no mental time travel. Now imagine if professionals begin to study ASPD and psychopathy through the lense of an inability to mental time travel, rather than focusing on empathy and emotional deficits?
I hate those generic posts that are like "hey person with npd you're awesome and the best" or whatever. You don't know me?? You're not talking to me. You just want to make yourself feel better by thinking you're doing something.
.
"i LOVE everyone with xyzpd!!! you guys are all just misunderstood victims of our society!!! but I'M BETTER than those OTHER people which is the only reason i'm performatively posting this." genuinely how i read the worst of those posts btw.
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You were too late.
my kerdly zine piece for @kerdlyzine, thanks for having me :D
EXTRA:
cookies for you
my kerdly secret santa gift for @kittykibbl ! I did the "baking" prompt, and I thought it would be cute if Kris and Berdly did the tv world cooking show together (ft. tenna). I hope you like it! This was very fun to do ^_^.
you give us hope, susie
dude i love your kris
literally an cute apple
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you give us hope, susie
dude i love your kris
you give us hope, susie
Berdly drank Kris Tea! HP fully restored!
I KNOW! HEHEHE!!
I found this somewhere and it inspired me to analyze some of Jevil's Japanese dialogue on my own! Which includes answering the question to the pronouns thing.
I know only a little Japanese and I mostly relied on Google Translate and research to get the idea of the text, so any corrections from anyone who knows more would be appreciated!
If anyone wants to see the dialogue themselves, you can find it in the Japanese Deltarune Wiki.
🎠🃏🌀🎠🃏🌀🎠🃏🌀🎠🃏🌀🎠🃏🌀🎠🃏🌀
Oh wow, that comment up there is from my husband!!
I really appreciate your input in wanting to do some personal research into the Japanese version of Deltarune and especially Jevil's character, but if you don't mind, I would like to add a few corrections here and there to your post in places where google translate was unable to accurately translate certain aspects of text/spelling and also add some much-needed context and analysis to the dialogue!!
There are some errors in the translation you presented, not so much in a word-to-word basis but rather a cadence and context basis. The main one I noticed was your translation of his "head" line. You inserted "I/my" pronouns when there originally were no pronouns whatsoever in the Japanese text. My husband translated all of his dialogue as well before ever posting this comment and it should read more like this:
The head. Not "my head". There is an implied disconnect in this sentence. The usage of the word "kireru/キレる" has a double entendre that you may know of, being that it's also the phrase for "to be disconnected/ broken/ to be split", and with the katakana spelling it is almost exclusively used as a way to describe one "snapping" or "losing temper/control", implying Jevil's head/mental state is broken or split and he is aware of this fact. This double-meaning would work very well for the read that Jevil's mind is split, or that he is plural, or even just that his head is literally broken from his body. I think this context is deeply necessary when translating Jevil's speech, and all options and meanings of this world should be considered especially since Toby is known for using puns and wordplay in his translations (see: all of Spamton's JPN dialogue). Secondly, you did well in translating certain words and phrases and adding a bit of clarification, but I couldn't help but notice there wasn't much genuine analysis to the conversational, contextual aspect of these terms. Back on the topic of pronouns...
There is another intriguing analysis to be had here. "My body is locked up as punishment…" is spoken politely. A soft voice calls through the bars (hence the "cutesy"/excited appeal of most of his dialogue that you picked up on already) but then, "I'M fast, don't you know?" is spoken with "WASHI", more of booming voice. It's a pronoun for elders, mostly. It directly contradicts the context of his usage of pronouns like "watashi" and especially "boku."
I would challenge the idea that his constant switching of pronoun usage both for himself and others is simply meaningless chaos, as that's not really how localization works when you are trying to add context; Toby Fox himself has stated very recently that he actually attempts to make the Japanese version less vague. Not to mention the fact that Jevil's English phrasing is literally supposed to read like mistranslated text, while his Japanese phrasing is much more sensible and clear, giving us the idea that Jevil's Japanese is better than his English and it is meant to be interpreted as such, therefore his strange "Jevilisms" in Japanese are deeply intentional. His switching between "you" pronouns such as "omae" and "kimi" are also referential to closeness and feelings towards others when used in Japanese conversation, which actually further implies he is constantly switching between different feelings towards the Fun Gang and it's not out of simple randomness or boredom (again, this wouldn't make a lot of sense to a native Japanese speaker in this context and would add virtually nothing to his character when compared to all of his other speech quirks).
Ultimately, I think Jevil's Japanese dialogue is actually proof that he does care and he chooses his words with great intention and inflicts meaning upon each and every sentence he says, which lines up with not only his character but also a statement Toby himself made during a stream of Jevil's battle: "It only appears random. All chaos is order."
there is japanese version of "when youre already playing" line,
its: "＊ どうやって 拒否しましょうね。 もう しています ゲーム。 あなたたち。"
corbin:
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who needs remorse when instead you can be comfortable with being a cunt and not care about it
Why is no one talking about how having diagnosed ASPD or psychopathy (also a ‘lack of remorse’ also is a frequent determining factor on parole or sentencing, as if that’s fucking controllable) gets you worse sentencing, like longer prison time or lose parole or even death penalty over life according to some. Literally the most blatant ableism nobody talks about. All considered normal and valid and talked about casually. Occasionally, ive heard of non ableist psychiatrists refuse to diagnose people with aspd when they might get in trouble with the law in future because of a fear theyd get worse sentences or death because of this. Having a disorder about a lack of empathy and impulse control is somehow considered voluntary and making you more “evil” and deserving of suffering. Prison system is shit in general but this is a great example.
