To the death and far beyond

Yaaaawn! Call me when they're covered in blood and having gay sex

i am going to suck you off! *puts in plastic vampire teeth and gives you the worst blowjob imaginable*

oh you’re yanking my chain? yank harder

in space no one can hear you moan like a girl

They say ooooh be a good boy for daddy and you'll get a reward. But then the reward is just gay sex. This is bullshit. I wanted a skateboard

Ghosts aren't real, it was probably just the house settling that gave you that blowjob

It’s all corrupt girl

dont store a knife with the point facing down, it damages the blade. no, dont do that either. when you store it with the point facing up you might accidentally hurt yourself when you try to grab it. dont store a knife at all actually. your blade must never leave your hand, always ready, ruthless and waiting. you know deep down that ever since you learned the stench of blood you will never be able to cast it aside. or just get a sheath for it i guess.

if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit