love has ways of bringing things back to life

my stomach feels a little funny

probably from the raw fish I snagged from the breakfast buffet this morning

I ignore it and drink my lemonade and eat from the appetizer platter

after being hyped up I text The Boy

almost immediately I start to feel nauseous

to the point where I don’t notice that he replied within three minutes until a couple more minutes afterwards

I reply back to him

I still feel nauseous

I ask for a glass of water

it doesn’t help

I start CRYING in PUBLIC

I excuse myself for the bathroom

I sob

I use the toilet and feel a bit better

I go back to the table determined to enjoy my dinner

our food comes

it looks and smells delicious but my appetite is nonexistent

I take three bites

I start crying AGAIN

my roommate offers to take me back to our hotel

I don’t want to interrupt her dinner but I really don’t want to keep weeping in public

we go back to the hotel while the rest of the group stays to finish dinner

I get to my room and change into my pajamas, crying the whole time for some reason

she brings me back some medicine and I take it and lie down