本当は 恐いよ だけど生きてく

She is happy. She...she should be happy.

Her father is here. There is nothing calling him away. Her caretakers are still here, but still distant enough that the feelings she felt swelling in her chest did not feel stifling.

She...she is supposed to feel happy.

Why does she not?

Her father is smiling. For once, he does not say anything, and yet she feels her blood boiling unprompted all the same. Why was he here, when there were still things to accomplish? Was he not wasting time? Was she not a waste of time, in the grand scheme of things?

Father did not take the time to visit. And he did not waste away in idle leisure.

The realization rolls over suddenly, like tea escaping from a cup that has been jostled. It spreads quicker than you can react, an dhen realization sinks in, you are left sitting there silently as the moment passes over you.

"Ah..." Now that she looks at him, she is not sure that the expression on his face has changed at all the entire time she has spoken. "None of this is real, is it?"

The change happens all at once, like shattering glass. Suddenly, Mitama sits in a room she does not know. Suddenly, the familiar faces have all left her. And, suddenly, there is a woman with familiar eyes staring at her.

"Oh, thank goodness you are safe." Mikoto pulled her in for a brief hug and then released her. "Mitama, correct? Azama's daughter?" She wondered if the young girl had a different name here or if it was the same too. Maybe there were constants between their timelines, though what she didn't know, and now was not the time to figure it out.

"Or if you prefer, I like to take tea in the evenings. I always welcome more company at tea time."

The clamor of the dining hall had lessened as students and staff left to return to their duties, but Mikoto remained seated next to Kurthnaga. "I know you have a lot weighing on you. Burdens that words will not fix so easily, but do not forget that you are never alone. Even a king need not shoulder every burden alone. That is something I wish I had done more when I was acting queen. Too often I kept my worries to myself, even while surrounded by friends."

It was not Mikoto's first time taking care of children and it would not be her last. Especially as she had frequently been volunteering to help with the children who had recently become orphaned or otherwise had no place to go. She did not yet know who her partner was this time, but like before she was carrying a bushel of apples meant to serve as snacks for the children.

It was quite to her surprise when she saw a very familiar face as she approached the makeshift school. It was too bad she did not have his name.

"Well, hello again. I was worried about you." She did not touch on the topic further than that. He had been so distraught last they met, and she as well if she was being honest. "I did not get your name before. I'm Mikoto. Are you here to help me teach the children?"

It's by coincidence that Mikoto comes across Nasir, but with the mission she's been given she views it a boon. He had helped her before with the missing students, surely he might help her now as well.

But first thing's first: She cannot ask for his help until she's asked after his well being. The last month has been a drain upon everyone and as concerned as she is about her impending mission, those around her are just as important.

"Nasir." Mikoto smiled as she approached the man. He was the type to keep his secrets close but she hadn't been given reason to think badly of him. "I am so glad to see that you are safe. I do not remember seeing you during the attack or afterwards, were you able to find shelter?" Apparently so, he looked fairly unharmed, less so than others, but some just weathered disaster better.

But it was an order no less. So did he trudge down past the gates of Garreg Mach to the beloathed opera. Peaking inside the door, it was a big affair. An enormos amount of people went to and fro, preparing all manner of things. Silly. He ducked under various preparations into a smaller hall, though still enormous, with only a few people meandering about. That’s… He’d only see her at a few events, but Finn was sure she was a proper lady of the academy. Well, unfortunately, he’d have to say hello.

“Good evening, Lady Mikoto,” his voice etched into the shadow. “What brings you here?” His eyes followed hers as she stared at a strange box filled with pom poms, umbrellas, masks, and other odd items. Strange to find a lady of her standing in this fiasco. “Can I help you?”

So engrossed in preparation, she did not see Finn approach, and when he spoke she turned to him in surprise.

"Ah, Finn, you are just the person I need, actually!" Mikoto pulled out two props from the box, one a rose and the other a streamer attached to a small stick. She twirled it around, the ribbon sashaying in the air in beautiful arcs. Her smile grew bigger and it was obvious she was enjoying herself. "Which one do you want?"

Working with children was second nature to Mikoto. When it spread that there was a need for teachers to work with the displaced children, she volunteered without a second thought. This was an awful time for anyone to go through, let alone a child, and if she could be there to ease their burdens, to take their minds off of what happened for even a few moments, then she would.

It was much to her surprise that she found herself joined by a very familiar face.

"Ah, perfect timing!" Mikoto looked up from her sweeping. "Could you help me finish tidying up?" It wasn't a proper classroom the two were teaching in, too much had been destroyed and so they'd been assigned a random building to teach in, but it hadn't been in the tidiest condition when Mikoto arrived. There were desks, but there was also dust and debris and a draft that she didn't think they would be able to do anything about. "I brought in some apples for the children," she nodded toward a basket that held a bushel of apples, "but I'm starting to wonder if we should hold class outside. This place is just so...dreary, don't you think?"

Still, Mikoto smiled at Dheginsea. "I didn't know you were also volunteering, though. Do you have experience teaching children?"

He had searched, and searched, but he could not find his family. He had barely seen Takumi, and he was missing. Sakura, dear Sakura, he could not find her no matter how he searched. Then there was Mikoto.

Truthfully, he knew they could all survive without him: they were proud Hoshidans, after all. That was what he had been telling himself when he focused his attention on herding students out of the Academy. That was what he told himself when he couldn’t find them.

As people returned to the Academy, so too did he return. Where else was Ryoma supposed to go? He couldn’t go home, he had no plans beyond Garreg Mach. He was glad the monastery opened up again; he had something to do once more. The grounds were not as they once were, but they were still standing.

He saw her. He was certain it was the same spot he had seen her again for the first time. This time, however, it wasn’t horror that gripped him at the sight of her.

“Mother!” he called out, before chasing after her. She was clearly wounded, clearly exhausted like the rest of them, but it was Mikoto still. He embraced her tightly, though whether or not he was hurting her, he couldn’t tell. “Mother, I’m so glad to see you. Have you found the others yet?”

But had this chaos consumed her other children? If she allowed herself to dwell on it, then she would have been left weeping for the entire month, and there was so much to do. Still to do. Eventually, they would all find each other again. She had to have faith in that.

“Mother!”

Mikoto knew that voice anywhere, had heard it call to her in a thousand different ways. After a month of wishing to hear his voice once more, the sudden confirmation that Ryoma was alive and here made tears spring to her eyes.

She threw her arms around him in return, holding him as tightly to her as she could. He was real, he was— her broken sobs cut through her thoughts. It was all she could do to simply hold him and know that he was alive.

"Only if you promise that no work is involved," Mikoto replied with a smile. It was for his sake but also for her own. Her emotions had been teetering on a tightrope for the past month, the fates of her children wearing heavy on her heart. She had only made it through without completely shutting down due to her years at court, spending years acting as if everything was fine after Kamui had been taken from her.

Lambert had said he would take her up on both offers, so she assumed he was still not feeling at his best. "Let me heal you before we leave. No sense in walking around in pain." She borrowed one of the nearby heal staffs, a familiar weight after a month of carrying one almost constantly. The spell took only a moment to a cast.

Roll: 18

"There we go." She patted his arm and returned the staff as she continued, "I would usually offer you tea in my office but," she hummed beneath her breath, "well, like most of us, it has seen better days. Let us find somewhere to sit outside. We have fine weather today, it would be a shame to not enjoy it."

That was what brought her back to these dark corridors and winding passageways. It felt so long ago now that she and Nasir had come here in search of those missing students.

Mikoto moved lightly, wondering just how far these passages traveled and if anyone was truly here. They had not ventured so far down last time.

Footsteps echoed nearby and Mikoto paused. "Hello?" She continued walking and turned the corner.

Her eyes widened. "Azura?" A faint but hopeful, almost disbelieving question. A name she had not spoken in some time, a face she had not seen for even longer. Yet she could not mistake that long wave of azure hair nor her features, so similar to her sister's, yet seeing her so suddenly it felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her. Was this how others felt when they found her? When the Mikoto they knew was long dead and buried and she stood before them? Because in her time Azura was no longer among the living.

It is always a relief when they come across survivors. Reuniting families and friends is something that's easy to feel good about after the destruction that had been wrought.

She hears her before she sees her, a light voice followed by a flash of rose-colored hair. Mikoto moved desperately through the refugee encampment before she comes into view: Sakura. Her daughter.

"Sakura!" Mikoto hurried toward her, eager to envelop her youngest in her arms and hold her close. And that was exactly what she did before pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Oh, I'm so glad you're safe." Mikoto held her tight and didn't seem intent on letting her go anytime soon.

he hears the distant thundering before the figure making the noise appears: a massive golem draws close, face cold and unexpressive. fogado never likes enemies he can't read---how on earth is one to expect the next move when there's no brain to pick? something like this lives only to fight and cannot conceive of doing anything else. what is it like to live a life like that? fogado isn't sure he can say that he doesn't know.

his eyes harden and he spins around, hands flaring out to shield his comrades ( however futile the gesture actually is ). he's not going to keep letting them get pushed around. he will not allow them to get any more hurt or tired than they already are! " hold up, guys. lemme take this one. "

the golem is close, but fogado knows what to do. he ducks behind a fallen column littered with splintered pews; the rubble is positioned just so that countering an arrow volley would be difficult. that's all he needs. " yo, rock man! don't look now! "

Unit 14 attacks Enemy Unit 6 with Ranged Charge. (2/3) → (1/3) All enemies in Enemy Unit 6 lose 1HP. golem 2/3HP r. arm 2/3HP l. arm 2/3HP eye 2/3HP

The golem towers over them, impossibly large and seemingly impenetrable. But it's not. Anankos wasn't. Melanthios isn't. Cities fall, Garreg Mach may be destroyed, but they can rebuild and move forward.

Fogado launches his attack and suddenly Mikoto is running after him, arrow drawn, even as the golem raises its arm for a counterattack. It hefts a large portion of the cathedral floor above it, intending to rain it down upon them.

And there's the weak point.

"The arms! Focus on the arms!" Her arrows are already flying through the air, joining Fogado's as they create cracks in the golem's stone joints. It fractures, slowly, fissures winding their way around its limbs as Ferdinand and Azama join in the attack. Its movements shudder to a halt as its joints shift and crack, crumbling beneath the weight it carried.

Enemy Unit 6 attacks Unit 14 [Roll 4+4+4+4 (+2)=18 vs. 9+8+6+3 (+4)=30] 18-30= -12 All enemies in Enemy Unit 6 lose 2 HP! golem 0/3HP r. arm 0/3HP l. arm 0/3HP eye 0/3HP ENEMY UNIT 6 IS DEFEATED!

And it all came toppling down right on the golem's head.

Just playing devil's advocate - after all, 'anyone else' could just as well prove to be enemies. But no... All is quiet. Statues, fallen, forlorn, stare at their feet on their passage by.

"Hmm... Look."

The silence has lifted, somewhat. There, across splintered pews and ruined stone, another of the groups bound initially for the cathedral. Their footsteps echo each other's. Azama offers a faint wave before looking back to the stained glass window on the other side...

"What counts as ground claimed, kitty cat?" he asks aloud -

to Astarot, or, really, to whoever's listening.

"To be sure, let us confirm there's no more enemies hiding in any shadowed corners."

Unit 14 moves one nodule up and to the right.

Now that there was no imminent threat of attack, however, Mikoto fell into step beside Azama. "I am glad to see you, Azama. Your skills are as sharp as ever."

Azama doesn't really want to eat this tough-to-swallow pill of theirs, but as one of the adults in the group, and a professor no less, he supposes he ought to at least somewhat lead. (It definitely has nothing to do with Queen Mikoto's presence or what Hinoka would say if she caught him slouching before her. . .)

"Ready as I'm going to be!" he notes with far greater enthusiasm than he feels, this before darting into the open where the golem bumbles its way about, a terrible crunch of stone and marble grating with every dragging step it takes.

ENEMY PHASE 9 Enemy Unit 6 moves one nodule to the left.

Knuckles clench about his worn stave. Shoulder aches,

but again there is that warm glow from before,

(MIDNIGHT) HEALING TOUCH Azama 4/4HP, Mikoto 4/4HP, Fogado 4/4HP, Ferdinand 4/4HP

and Azama wonders if he should get a cat in the future, maybe name it Ast, or Asty, in honour of the black feline's lucky timing. Steps feel lighter. His head feels clearer. His shoulder's stopped throbbing.

He's tucked himself away behind a statue, positioned for an all-out team attack on the giant,

but still within earshot, he finds he can't help himself:

he hears the distant thundering before the figure making the noise appears: a massive golem draws close, face cold and unexpressive. fogado never likes enemies he can't read---how on earth is one to expect the next move when there's no brain to pick? something like this lives only to fight and cannot conceive of doing anything else. what is it like to live a life like that? fogado isn't sure he can say that he doesn't know.

his eyes harden and he spins around, hands flaring out to shield his comrades ( however futile the gesture actually is ). he's not going to keep letting them get pushed around. he will not allow them to get any more hurt or tired than they already are! " hold up, guys. lemme take this one. "

the golem is close, but fogado knows what to do. he ducks behind a fallen column littered with splintered pews; the rubble is positioned just so that countering an arrow volley would be difficult. that's all he needs. " yo, rock man! don't look now! "

Unit 14 attacks Enemy Unit 6 with Ranged Charge. (2/3) → (1/3) All enemies in Enemy Unit 6 lose 1HP. golem 2/3HP r. arm 2/3HP l. arm 2/3HP eye 2/3HP

The golem towers over them, impossibly large and seemingly impenetrable. But it's not. Anankos wasn't. Melanthios isn't. Cities fall, Garreg Mach may be destroyed, but they can rebuild and move forward.

Fogado launches his attack and suddenly Mikoto is running after him, arrow drawn, even as the golem raises its arm for a counterattack. It hefts a large portion of the cathedral floor above it, intending to rain it down upon them.

And there's the weak point.

"The arms! Focus on the arms!" Her arrows are already flying through the air, joining Fogado's as they create cracks in the golem's stone joints. It fractures, slowly, fissures winding their way around its limbs as Ferdinand and Azama join in the attack. Its movements shudder to a halt as its joints shift and crack, crumbling beneath the weight it carried.

Enemy Unit 6 attacks Unit 14 [Roll 4+4+4+4 (+2)=18 vs. 9+8+6+3 (+4)=30] 18-30= -12 All enemies in Enemy Unit 6 lose 2 HP! golem 0/3HP r. arm 0/3HP l. arm 0/3HP eye 0/3HP ENEMY UNIT 6 IS DEFEATED!

And it all came toppling down right on the golem's head.

But Lady Hinoka is not here.

"My stave is in poor condition and I don't have much left in me where Fodlan's magics are concerned... Let us be cautious," he advises, his tone airy despite the intended pragmatism in his words. They're safe for now, as they linger behind cover licking their wounds, but... such safety is relative, and sure to be short-lived.

Onward they move.

This Fogado fellow is kind of funny. Azama likes him, he thinks - for now, anyway.

"That sounds nice - she should get to hone her craft amongst peers. Although... you've yet to convince me you'd be much of a good influence on her."

The monk grins. Whether or not he's joking is anyone's guess.

Anyway, this is all fun and games, right? Until someone gets hurt, that is. Then it's hilarious. ... Ah, is that not the saying?

Anyway, that siege blast had hurt to the point Azama wondered if he was soon to see the heavens. It burned, tore, bruised, and burned some more. The monk ducks behind a half ruined pillar, hand coming away from his shoulder red. Thick brows furrow. Don't like that!

"Guh..."

ENEMY PHASE 7 Enemy Unit 6 sieges ( 0/2 charges left ) Unit 14! -0.5HP! Azama 2.5/4HP, Mikoto 2.5/4HP, Fogado 2.5/4HP, Ferdinand 2.5/4HP

The towering thing responsible for this pain lumbers in their general direction, but the monk doubts if it's because it's seen them. The blasted thing merely looks to be launching attacks in any which direction, the dastard.

But as Fogado had pointed out... perhaps it was finished now with its wanton destruction and panic-raising.

As the first siege blasts hits, and Ferdinand jumps to protect her, Mikoto wants to instinctively pull him behind her. He is only recently healed, but there's no time as their group is seized by a fiery grip.

Before the next blast hits, Mikoto pulls Ferdinand behind a wall with her for cover. She keeps her hand on his arm, as if she's afraid he might run out again. She knows he wont but she likes the assurance.

Once it passes, Mikoto gestures to the path behind them with a courtly sweep of her arm and a commanding tone. "This way! We can take a moment and plan our next move."

mischievous warmth was not something he was privy to often. but he's more than grateful for it, since the fighting and clawing had taken so much from them already. he can barely hear what his teammates are saying. something about haikus. something about Mitama. did Azama lose her? he doesn't know how the stars choose their people, but two of them fought. here. with him. coincidences could be considered divine if all the stars were aligned the way they were.

Mikoto and Azama make quick on culling the darkness, throwing ranged bolts and shooting arrows far enough to make the monsters ball over. the beasts rolled onto one side, as their necks began to faucet pools of red onto the floor.

Unit 14 ranged attacks Enemy Unit 4. Guaranteed -1HP All Enemies in Enemy Unit 4 lose 1HP! demonic beast 0/3HP monster 0/3HP monster 0/3HP monster 0/3HP

they cut through pillars, seeking to claim more ground before the day ended. Astarot—that's what that feline-creatures name was… did that voice really make good on its promises? with the first healing, he suspected as much. he wanted to lay faith in something, after a month of washing over his identity with more questions than answers. they began their reconnaissance with searching eyes, but there was nothing up here except the signs of a cathedral that used to be loved.

Unit 14 moves one nodule diagonally.

"Mikoto, Azama. please, before we run into something more dangerous, might you heal us to the best of your ability?"

he was always the ignorant one. the fool. the ever-bright. but could the world know him as something else? could he not be a leader?

the healing blanketed them all, and he prayed that it was the right call. they don't have much else they can use moving forward.

The group hurries around the outer edge of the cathedral, its architecture once draped in grandeur now reduced to ruin stone and broken stained glass.

Once they have a moment to catch their breath, the four huddle behind a pillar. Mikoto raises her staff and lets its healing magic wash over the group. Her eyes catch Azama's and for a moment she wanted to ask about Mitama, but she decides to save the question for later. She doesn't want to risk anyone losing focus.

The healing isn't much, but they all seem to breathe easier, and that puts Mikoto's heart at ease just a little. "Let us continue while the coast is clear."