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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Recovery is not some pill that you take & magically things get better.
Your traumas, understandably, have over-activated your bodyâs survival system, and the ONLY ANSWER IS FOR YOU to re-calibrate them: all those hormones involved in depression & anxiety.
I promise that I will not give up. I understand that my body is pre-programmed and will want to automatically reset to the default setting when challenged. Â This does not mean failure but a needed test on my road to more effectiveness.
I promise to remember this process is more like building a muscle than a magic pill that makes everything better. Â
I completely agree & understand that ONLY I CAN make this work through repeated repetition when things are calm & then during practice events. Â No one can do this work for me.
8 Powerful Steps to Positive Thinking
1.  Always focus on what you want rather than what you donât want:Â
The mistake that most of us make when having a problem is to talk about it over and over again instead of focusing on the end result, instead of focusing on what we want to achieve.
2.  Know that every problem comes with a lesson:Â
There is always a lesson in everything that happens to us, and we should constantly look for what that lesson is and master it. For as Confucius said: âIf you make a mistake and do not correct it, this is called a mistake.â
3. Donât believe everything you think:Â
Our problems arenât as big as the mind is trying to convince us, and if you choose to believe every negative though that goes through your mind, you will always get in trouble. Observe your mind, observe your thoughts, but donât identify yourself with them. Go beyond them.
4. Choose to express your gratitude for everything that happens to you, whether good or bad, and also for every person you interact with:Â
The more you choose to express your gratitude, the more reasons you will have to express your gratitude for, and when youâre too busy focusing on the many things that you are grateful for, there will be no more room left for stress and worry.
5. Know that there is a reason for everything:Â
Everything that happens to you, happens for a reason and every person that enters your life enters for a reason, and itâs your responsibility to act upon this knowing and not to label them as being good or bad, negative or positive, etc.
Keep reading

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Why Did Dad Abandon me? Or did he?
Its difficult to start this one; but I am going to write this as my point of view being a step mom and witnessing my husband being accused of this by his children. His oldest accused him of abandoning them, she was very verbal on how she felt. very harsh, hurtful things were said to him. Very disrespectful, but you know what we donât blame her. She has witnessed only her mothers side and only heard her mothers side. She never gave her dad the chance, he was made to look bad from dad one. #askdad As she has grown older and is a young adult now, who suffers from depression and anxiety, I am sure that is his fault also. How? Ask yourself. Dad was forced out of their lives, #momplaysvictim Dad was not given a choice where he would go, or anything when mom decided she was done with him. She had already bought the plane ticket. Â #dadisheartbroken You see mom has admitted she made a mistake and wanted dad back, #adultery Dad did not want to take her back, he could not forgive her of her #adultery, trust was broken.That is when things started getting more difficult, Mom started cutting his phone time down, and less communication, it was okay for her to replace dad, with #theloveofherlife who she separated from shortly after marrying, still wanting dad back, but found out dad had remarried and just wanted to be dad. #askdad So my question is did dad abandon you or was he forced to no contact? #askdad #momisalienator
Why I Pray for My Husbands EX
RAMBLINGS OF A MIDDLE AGED FEMALE
I am middle aged married female, I married a wonderful man who was married prior to our meeting, so some of my blogs will be addressing our dealings with his ex and his beautiful teen daughters, my elderly parents which one has dementia, being a mom to a fantastic son who is a teacher, married to a beautiful girl, they made me a granny to two awesome grandchildren (one of which has HPE), and there is so much more I will blog about. Feedback is welcome
WHY I PRAY FOR MY HUSBANDS EXI wasnât entirely sure I would post this. Â Iâve had this sitting in my brain for a few months now, and I couldnât decide if I should write it, because somehow I feel kind of weird and awkward telling other people that I pray for my husbandâs ex-wife. Â The thing is, though, I think we need more people to pray for their awkward situations and the people they donât always get along with. Â The world would be a better place.So I decided to sit down and thoughtfully write this out. Â I hope it encourages you to be the stepmom God wants you to be and that you will decide to pray for your husbandâs ex-wife too. Â So here it is.Why I pray for my husbandâs ex-wife: Regardless of what I think of her at different points in time, my husbandâs ex-wife is a person too, and God loves her. Â If God loves her, and if Jesus tells us to âlove your neighbor as yourself,â shouldnât I pray for her as I would want others to pray for me? Â Â She is a person, and she is loved by God; therefore, she needs and is deserving of my prayers. Chances are, she hurts too. Â Regardless of what your husband has told me about their divorce (how it happened, how she hurt him, etc.), I can guarantee you that there was some amount of pain on her end that my husband inflicted. Â Although, It may not be as deeply hurting as cheating, Â but my point is that, no matter what she did to my husband, he hurt her as well. Â She needs prayer to overcome her pain. Most importantly, she is the mother of my step children. Â What affects her affects them. Â This includes her relationships, her finances, her spiritual well-being, her emotional and mental well-being, and her health. Â What affects my step children affects me, because their attitudes and behaviors will reflect how they are feeling. Â If I want my step children to feel loved and secure at our home, why wouldnât I want that for them all the time?If you truly care for your step children, pray for their mother. Â with Prayer, I will begin to forgive her for any hurt that she has caused us, and my feelings toward her may improve. Â Even if I donât feel like I love her like your âBFF,â at least I can look on her more positively. Â And eventually, it is possible that her attitudes toward me will change, making life better for everyone involved.
karma can not happen soon enough
Psycho?
If anyone, through this horrific alienation ordeal, has called you a âpsychoâ- your response should be- âthank you very much.â You have been lied to, falsely accused of abuse, denied visitation, denied phone contact, been blocked from everything, drug into court to witness a cast of more liars and money grabbers to have your reputation put on the chopping block⌠⌠Yeah we are a little psycho⌠But what kind of healthy parent would not go ballistic when their children are deliberately taught how to hate and literally stolen from their life???? We as alienated parents are pissed as hell and we want our children back NOW! We are not going to take this bullshit any longer⌠So we are going a little psycho!!! We are going to yell from the rooftops to our local senators and congress and demand that our children be given the opportunity and freedom to love both parents, We are going to educate teachers, counselors, school supervisors, law enforcement, CPS, parents etc⌠that taking a child from a loving parent is NOT going to be tolerated! We are a little psycho because our children love us, need us and are counting on us to save them from the pain of parental alienation. What went so bad when you got your way in the divorce that you felt the need to hurt us more? You got child support, you got the marriage ended, you got custody of the children, you got to mess them up anyone you wanted and yet you are still trying to hurt me? Why I ask, you cheated, you filed, you decided. So you are still trying to hurt me, someday you will not have full control over these children and they will be curious, they will ask questions, they will learn to hate you for lying to them, and deciding to cut their other parent out of their lives. The only thing you have to fear is your SELF, cause as you grow older and the children are out of the home, you will have to live with yourself and the bed you have made. We have waited years for this and we can wait longer yet, but your day is coming, and I hope to GOD no one feels sorry for you, cause the truth does come out eventually, juggling all those balls must be exhausting. You were not thinking long term were you? Always instant gratification with you. So YES I am a little PSYCO⌠Thank you.
Why I Pray for my husbands Ex wife...
I wasnât entirely sure I would post this. Iâve had this sitting in my brain for a few months now, and I couldnât decide if I should write it, because somehow I feel kind of weird and awkward telling other people that I pray for my husbandâs ex-wife. The thing is, though, I think we need more people to pray for their awkward situations and the people they donât always get along with. The world would be a better place.
So I decided to sit down and thoughtfully write this out. I hope it encourages you to be the stepmom God wants you to be and that you will decide to pray for your husbandâs ex-wife too. So here it is.
Why I pray for my husbandâs ex-wife:
 Regardless of what I think of her at different points in time, my husbandâs ex-wife is a person too, and God loves her.   If God loves her, and if Jesus tells us to âlove your neighbor as yourself,â shouldnât I pray for her as I would want others to pray for me?  She is a person, and she is loved by God; therefore, she needs and is deserving of my prayers.
 Chances are, she hurts too. Regardless of what your husband has told me about their divorce (how it happened, how she hurt him, etc.), I can guarantee you that there was some amount of pain on her end that my husband inflicted. Although, It may not be as deeply hurting as cheating, but my point is that, no matter what she did to my husband, he hurt her as well. She needs prayer to overcome her pain.
 Most importantly, she is the mother of my step children. What affects her affects them.  This includes her relationships, her finances, her spiritual well-being, her emotional and mental well-being, and her health. What affects my step children affects me, because their attitudes and behaviors will reflect how they are feeling. If I want my step children to feel loved and secure at our home, why wouldnât I want that for them all the time?
If you truly care for your step children, pray for their mother. with Prayer, I will begin to forgive her for any hurt that she has caused us, and my feelings toward her may improve. Even if I donât feel like I love her like your âBFF,â at least I can look on her more positively. And eventually, it is possible that her attitudes toward me will change, making life better for everyone involved.

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Why I Pray for my husbands Ex wife...
I wasnât entirely sure I would post this. Iâve had this sitting in my brain for a few months now, and I couldnât decide if I should write it, because somehow I feel kind of weird and awkward telling other people that I pray for my husbandâs ex-wife. The thing is, though, I think we need more people to pray for their awkward situations and the people they donât always get along with. The world would be a better place.
So I decided to sit down and thoughtfully write this out. I hope it encourages you to be the stepmom God wants you to be and that you will decide to pray for your husbandâs ex-wife too. So here it is.
Why I pray for my husbandâs ex-wife:
 Regardless of what I think of her at different points in time, my husbandâs ex-wife is a person too, and God loves her.   We are told in the Bible to âlove your neighbor as yourself,â shouldnât I pray for her as I would want others to pray for me?  She is a person, and she is loved by God; therefore, she needs and is deserving of my prayers.
 Chances are, she hurts too. Regardless of what my husband has told me about their divorce (how it happened, how she hurt him, etc.), I can guarantee you that there was some amount of pain on her end that my husband inflicted. Although, It may not be as deeply hurting as cheating, but my point is that, no matter what she did to my husband, he hurt her as well. She needs prayer to overcome her pain.
 Most importantly, she is the mother of my step children. What affects her affects them.  This includes her relationships, her finances, her spiritual well-being, her emotional and mental well-being, and her health. What affects my step children affects me, because their attitudes and behaviors will reflect how they are feeling. If I want my step children to feel loved and secure at our home, why wouldnât I want that for them all the time?
If you truly care for your step children, pray for their mother. with Prayer, I will begin to forgive her for any hurt that she has caused us, and my feelings toward her may improve. Even if I donât feel like I love her like your âBFF,â at least I can look on her more positively. And eventually, it is possible that her attitudes toward me will change, making life better for everyone involved.
Nearly a decade of watching husbands heartache
Over the last 10 years I have watched my husband struggle with his emotions on his relationship with his daughters and the dealings with his ex. He has always been guarded on his emotions as most men are, but there as been at least half dozen times I have watched him breakdown and cry. The crying was so heartbreaking to witness, I tried to console him, I wanted to make it better but so many roadblocks in the way. He puts on a brave front, he wants what is best for his daughters; he knows the situation they are in and have been in for the last ten years is far from perfect; at least they have a roof over their heads and have food on the table. the examples they have are sad excuses for adults. she knows just how close to bend the law before breaking it. My dear husband is not a real religious man, although we have prayed together on several occasions, prayed that God will watch over his daughters and help take some of his heartache away.  He has changed so much from the lost, angry, hurt man he was ten years ago, he has mellowed, and is more considerate, he says he thinks of his daughters plenty, more or less morning, noon and night. Certain times of the year he reflects on what his daughters might be doing. But still he knows he is a stranger to them and they are strangers to him, just wants to get to know them, and be in their lives. Just a few weeks ago, he brought up the subject of his oldest daughter, saying he hope is she is not a 100% like her mom, since her mom has been the only influence she has had for ten years; not by his choice but his ex's, his desire is that maybe just maybe his daughter has just a little bit of his personality and goodness; if not it will be hopeless; she will be just as evil, and able to use people and hurt people and one that plays victim. This breaks my heart two people that had children together can be so hateful to one another, I understand why my husband is angry, he was put in this position because of his ex's wants and desires. I stepped in and help him fight, for he had basically given up, I got a little peeved at him, telling him to fight for your children, fight to be in their lives, as always she is a step ahead of us, and its easier for her to keep people on her side since she has the girls living with her, and primarily keeps everything on the outside on the up and up, but inside her home we are pretty sure its not all a bed of roses. This my friends is predominantly what happens on the receiving end of a Parental Alienator, some people are fortunate enough to live in same zip code as their ex, unfortunately he was not given the choice of that, he was given a plane ticket along with the divorce papers. He had about two days to say goodbye, who does that to their children, or their spouse? She did. All because she had other wants and desires.  we keep watchful eye an daily prayers; #dadlovesyou
Saying goodbye to daddy
On January 29,2018 Daddy took his last breath.
Before dad death 6 months ago, he changed so much, at first he would hallucinate and unknown to us at first he was acting out his dreams too, wandering non stop for hours and hours, (like sleep walking) Lewy body dementia is the form that daddy had, we did not know at first nor did the doctors, as in most dementias at first they are all similar, some just sleep a lot or chatter talk, some forget everything, but not our daddy, he started out not knowing what to expect, but felt he was given a death sentence. it was slow at first, he would forget things, he chose to give up driving when he got lost in his home town and couldn't find his way back home (thank goodness mom was with him), forgetting to eat, forgetting to wear shoes, forgetting to take meds without mom reminding him. He started sleeping less and less, up all hours of the night, Â we could see it taking its toll on mom, she was worrying and cranky, he watched less and less TV (which use to be his favorite pass time)
He quit studying the Bible, cause reading was to difficult.
We knew it was time to make strong suggestions to our parents about moving from the farm to the city closer to us kids, so we could help as needed, that was a whole different process, dad was ready to move cause he knew he was getting worse, but mom wanted to stay longer, but gradually have made many trips to the farm us kids finally convinced her that it was time, We understood it was difficult giving up her dream retirement home, and going to a smaller one level duplex, but it would be closer to many doctors and hospitals, and closer to us kids so we could check on them, that all happened just in time, within about a three month period of living in the city, and many doctor appointments for them both, something  snapped within dad he wandered off one Sunday morning while waiting on mom to finish getting ready, thank goodness one Sibling was coming by to pick them up for church services, and was flagged down by a neighbor that dad was off in the wooded area, she ran out to get him and he was completely out of it, she could barely hold him up and walk, she immediately called me once she got him in the house and settled and gave him a drink.
When I got there mom was upset thinking we were upset with her, and we decided to take him to hospital, and that was the beginning of dads last 5 months with us, 11 hospitals and nursing homes, including geriatric psych stays, he grew weaker, and something about him would change, he was slowly losing his beautiful personality although we did get glimpses of it from time to time but he was slipping away, his beautiful smile was less often, he talked less, (which was very unlike daddy he never met a stranger) even though he was mostly hallucinating and wandering, he still was concerned for others, and the love of his life our mom, he always seem to perk up some when she came to visit, a few of there last times together, he wouldn't talk much, but he would just hold her hand as he drifted off to sleep.
dads swelling in his legs and feet and hands had gotten so bad towards the end of his time, and part of it I blame on the inattentive nursing home workers, he never got anything to drink except meal time, basically he didn't know if he was hungry or thirsty, he could not easily swallow anymore, unless it was finely pureed he had to drink thick fluids because he could choke.
Then January 29th approximately 12:30pm I received a call from hospice that he was gone, he was not alone, hospice was sitting with him but he did not want to be revived and we honored that, cause we knew his quality of life was not what he wanted.
I had to break the news to my little brother who works at the same place of employment I do, we took a few moments to cry and hug and we told our boss' they told us to go be with our family. but first we needed to call our siblings and find mom.
We all met at moms place and hugged and cried, but we knew we needed to make some firm plans, we had not yet decided where we wanted to have dad cremated, we had discussed it the weekend before  thinking we had several more months or so,
Thankfully one of my dear brother in laws, and one of my sisters went to the nursing home to say goodbye to daddy and hospice helped them make the choice of where to take dad, cause they can only hold him 6 hours at the nursing home. I know that must have been very difficult for them to do, but I am thankful for them as they chose to do it.
dads service was church like , thankful for my family's strong connection to so many wonderful people that brought food, took care of dinners, and providing the church, and my many talented family members, who made slide show of memories, and large pictures for dads memorial, and for all of the beautiful flowers and plants.
So grateful for my talented Son and daughter in law singing one of dads favorite songs for his memorial, for the congregational singing, and my brother in law and nephews for being able to speak at dads memorial. it was a beautiful service, the urn we had picked out for daddy was wooden with a etched scene of the mountains, and a man riding a motorcycle into those mountains (which fit dads hobbies to a T)
We love you daddy and we will miss you so much. We will take care of mom for you.
Thank you everyone for letting me share this with you.
Why Granny acts different?
Assuming the overall truthfulness of my findings why should this be so?Let me suggest some reasons:1. We are Older, the Mellower.  It canât be denied that some people become bitter with age. But the great bunch of us become less uptight, less bent out of shape by everyday frustrations and disappointments. Also, as people grow older, their expectations of others become more modest, as theyâve become more accomplished at seeing the world as it is.  Our attitude tends to be more tolerant, accepting, and forgiving. As a result, weâre likely to except the behaviors of our  grandchildren much less harshly than was the case when we were rearing our own children. 2. The Mindless backbreaking work of parenting verses the delights of Grand parenting.  Itâs not even debatable that parenting is a trying task. Kids can be difficult. They wear out your patience, no matter how hard you try to remain calm in the face of their wild behaviors. They can be whiny, demanding,  stubborn,  impulsiveâand at times just plain nasty. Thereâs probably not a single parent in the world who hasnât occasionally âlost itâ with their kids.But moving to the next generation, grandma, nana, nanny, or in my case Granny  typically arenât called upon to deal with their grand kids at their most challenging worst. Nor are we required to function as disciplinarian, so we can be easy. Having completed the worrisome, and super-responsible job of child rearing, we are in a far better position to simply sit back and enjoy all the things that children say and do that make them so lovable: their innocence, playfulness, wonder and curiosity, surprisingly charming ways of expressing themselves, and so on. The daily stresses that go with parenting are gone in this  grandparent to child relationship. And so our role it is less complicated, less stressful.So enjoy your grand kids, they are AWESOME
Why Did Dad Abandon me? Or did he?
Its difficult to start this one; but I am going to write this as my point of view being a step mom and witnessing my husband being accused of this by his children. His oldest accused him of abandoning them, she was very verbal on how she felt. very harsh, hurtful things were said to him. Very disrespectful, but you know what we don't blame her. She has witnessed only her mothers side and only heard her mothers side. She never gave her dad the chance, he was made to look bad from dad one. #askdad As she has grown older and is a young adult now, who suffers from depression and anxiety, I am sure that is his fault also. How? Ask yourself. Dad was forced out of their lives, #momplaysvictim Dad was not given a choice where he would go, or anything when mom decided she was done with him. She had already bought the plane ticket. Â #dadisheartbroken You see mom has admitted she made a mistake and wanted dad back, #adultery Dad did not want to take her back, he could not forgive her of her #adultery, trust was broken.That is when things started getting more difficult, Mom started cutting his phone time down, and less communication, it was okay for her to replace dad, with #theloveofherlife who she separated from shortly after marrying, still wanting dad back, but found out dad had remarried and just wanted to be dad. #askdad So my question is did dad abandon you or was he forced to no contact? #askdad #momisalienator

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I am middle aged married female, I married a wonderful man who was married prior to our meeting, so some of my blogs will be addressing our dealings with his ex and his beautiful teen daughters, my elderly parents which one has dementia, being a mom to a fantastic son who is a teacher, married to a beautiful girl, they made me a granny to two awesome grandchildren (one of which has HPE), and there is so much more I will blog about. Feedback is welcome
Psycho?
If anyone, through this horrific alienation ordeal, has called you a âpsychoâ- your response should be- âthank you very much.â You have been lied to, falsely accused of abuse, denied visitation, denied phone contact, been blocked from everything, drug into court to witness a cast of more liars and money grabbers to have your reputation put on the chopping block... ... Yeah we are a little psycho... But what kind of healthy parent would not go ballistic when their children are deliberately taught how to hate and literally stolen from their life???? We as alienated parents are pissed as hell and we want our children back NOW! We are not going to take this bullshit any longer... So we are going a little psycho!!! We are going to yell from the rooftops to our local senators and congress and demand that our children be given the opportunity and freedom to love both parents, We are going to educate teachers, counselors, school supervisors, law enforcement, CPS, parents etc... that taking a child from a loving parent is NOT going to be tolerated! We are a little psycho because our children love us, need us and are counting on us to save them from the pain of parental alienation. What went so bad when you got your way in the divorce that you felt the need to hurt us more? You got child support, you got the marriage ended, you got custody of the children, you got to mess them up anyone you wanted and yet you are still trying to hurt me? Why I ask, you cheated, you filed, you decided. So you are still trying to hurt me, someday you will not have full control over these children and they will be curious, they will ask questions, they will learn to hate you for lying to them, and deciding to cut their other parent out of their lives. The only thing you have to fear is your SELF, cause as you grow older and the children are out of the home, you will have to live with yourself and the bed you have made. We have waited years for this and we can wait longer yet, but your day is coming, and I hope to GOD no one feels sorry for you, cause the truth does come out eventually, juggling all those balls must be exhausting. You were not thinking long term were you? Always instant gratification with you. So YES I am a little PSYCO... Thank you.