URBAN SEMANTICS

Dylan Moran

On Sexy Costumes:

Ladies of all shapes and sizes and identification, we should be able to wear sexy costumes if we want to. We just shouldn't be made to feel like we have to, no matter how old we are.

While I totally agree with criticisms of the pressure to look sexy for Halloween or the ridiculous marketing of such, I also feel like that sometimes gets mixed up with shitty comments aimed at policing women's sexual expression.

On Racist Costumes:

OOOKKK, let's talk about race, let's talk about halloween costumes: 1. One of the benefits of being from a dominant culture or ethnicity is that there are plenty of choices for costumes from within that culture to choose from.

2. The reason why I'm so wary about you choosing a costume from my history is because we are tired of being seen as foreign or exotic or odd or different from "the norm." My ethnicity is not a look that I can just put on. Even if you do the research and want to be a specific character, because our society is not very aware of my people's stories, it just looks like you are promoting a caricature of me.

Some people might say, "Well, how come you can dress up as white characters? Isn't that the same thing?" I disagree, especially after taking a class on Canadian Immigration. There has been a long history of promoting assimilation in North American countries. Western-Anglo societies have literally spent decades, centuries trying to get people of colour to look and act like you not just for one day but everyday. Also, we know enough white characters, historical figures, and celebrities that you'd be hard pressed to find one of us dressing like "a generic white person" because we have been socialized to know that not all white people are alike. Unfortunately these nuances - especially in history - are not often taught in relation to people of colour.

A response to commentators from a previous version of the post: Also, I'm not saying that there is only pressure from white people, but as the dominant culture who is in control of much of the world's media, I just don't think you can spread and promote Western, predominantly Anglo, characters and then make claims about equality. When the systems and market flows become equal, then we can talk.

You are cocooned in my arms, enclosed by my blankets, asleep, I can smell the drunkenness of your dreams

Transfixed by shapes of shadow and light Lips-slack, eyes-wide in wonder Dumbstruck by fascination

What do you hear? How do you see?

Kris Ex on Drake’s ghostwriting accusations in NPR

Ennui is for skinny girls Skinny girls with skinny limbs Slender ceramic limbs glazed in a cream sheer silk slip Damp from having arms long enough to cradle knees in the bathtub, But now her arms are draped listlessly over the bed, over Straight-cut bangs that daintily shuffle across her forehead Like  a Newton’s  cradle

When I lie in bed all day, I depress into my mattress And eventually my body thickly slides into a gelatinous lump And at some point someone calls me a lazy fuck

An evening so bright

The light can still polish the buildings chrome

To bury yourself in ceramic and metal

  [And then to come out again]

  Caverns heaving sky and

Trimmings of rooftops run down into the dusk

I wonder if the reason we are fighting

Is because This doesn’t seem worth it to us This mess stretching through phone lines Pulled across three provinces

Is because I can’t reach out and hold you And strike you with the remembrance Of why you stand for this shit

Is because I can’t see you Standing there with that anger and frustration I wish I did not see in your eyes Forcing me to realize That you are still here, aren’t you

This is not all your fault But neither is it mine

To you I am an antagonist I am an afterthought

To me You are my partner My compadre My (sometimes) better half The person I sometimes want to kill In

WARNING: This May Contain Extremely Graphic Content

Ways.

It can’t always be Sunshine & Lollipops Rainbows & Buttercups

And I think to myself: In another life, Or maybe in a past life, Or perhaps in my inner life, I would’ve have made a good academic:

The honour of making a living off my mind, The relief of having the option to live a solitary life Where you would only have to gather with others on occasion To converse in the easy way that you do when you know for a fact That you all like the same thing, Feeling the superiority of holding sacred, specialized knowledge Valued by your peers with the recognition that denotes an acceptable level of success, Depending on the subject matter, that is.

There is a certain independence I feel like I missed out on: The freedom that comes with Receiving permission, maybe even encouragement at times, to Live inside your own head

To sit alone in a room Bent over a desk With both hands on paper A pen in your mouth And only books for company

Until I would have to un-veil my work to scholarly review, that is.

1. And all I want to do is kiss you and hug you and hold you and look at your face all the time and lie in your arms when I lie alone in my bed I think of you with your arms around me and the warmth of your long long body and all I want to say is I love you I love you I love you to you all night until you can hear it in the morning and for the rest of time and even if you never say it back again it would be just enough for you to received it if only you would receive it instead of looking anywhere but my face while the most I can do is describe all the things I want to say to you while I try to swallow those words I never wrote all these poems when you loved me and I regret I regret every moment of it and perhaps if I did then you would still be here or maybe not I don’t know I can never know I will never know

2. But I will write I will write this out I know I can write this out this is the first time in a long time that I’ve felt such a ferocious need to write it out and it is still hard and it feels like there is still this clot in a neural pathway somewhere in my brain but the words still come the words still come out the words still come through the pauses and maybe you maybe you did me a favour by shaking me from my stasis like your mother did to you and maybe someday I will thank you

I spent three days wondering If I had made the right choice But I do not think that I have felt The full consequence of this yet Nor will I feel it for a time after Because isn't this Where you have always left me? A year would pass  Where you would be nothing But a memory And you would let it happen You let it happen still I think I am still angry.

So a friend recently sent me this article entitled "Fatphobia: 5 Facts and a Guide for the Disbeliever" by Kitty Stryker and I shared it on social media, where it then got shared by other friends and so forth. I noticed that a lot of the same discussions were happening over and over again in the comments section and wanted to put in my own two cents. People seemed to really like my response and I think it deserves its own Tumblr post, so this is my response to, not only the discussions on this article, but also to almost every discussion on fatphobia (because they inevitably always revolve around the same points):

So I have seen the discussion above many, many times before and I just came here to state that this article is not trying to dissuade people from addressing the obesity epidemic. It is about how we can be shitty human beings to other human beings based solely on their appearance. The writer is not talking about the odd comment that someone may have taken the wrong way, she is talking about unhealthy acts of discrimination that is promoted under the guise of caring about people's health. There is a way to talk about losing weight in a productive, supportive way that focuses on a person's health and does not resort to shaming or hostility (in fact, I know it can be done because I thankfully have friends and health care professionals who do so). You can talk about health without making someone feel like a bad person, you can treat a fat person with respect while helping them onto a healthier path, and I think none of the examples from the article does any of those things.

There have been so many studies that have shown that over-eating is always a symptom and never a cause. There are a lot of mental health issues associated with weight gain and it is often a very personal thing (maybe that the fat person you wanted "to help" is already on a journey to health). Making a person feel bad about themselves is not helpful. In fact, it usually makes them feel worse which puts them into this vicious cycle where they want to indulge in more unhealthy behavior to deal with all the shame and pain. The article also points out that if society really wanted to help people live healthier lifestyles, they would make healthy foods more accessible.

Additionally, not everyone who is considered fat "eat a lot" or lead unhealthy lives and it is not right for us to judge and mock people based solely on our perceptions of their appearance. The article brings up that "fat" is often a societal construct that has nothing to do with how healthy someone actually is. The writer states that she is trying to live a healthy lifestyle, yet, due to the way her body looks, people often assume differently. I was actually very close to the "ideal" weight for my height during high school and participated in vigorous athletic activities, yet people still called me "fat." A lot of people's perceptions are just warped by the media or their own insecurities without any real knowledge about the diverse forms that a healthy human body can take. .