lady in distress.

I used to be here a lot. I used to have people with me. I used to have my brother. I used to have a special thing. I used to be loud. Then, I got quiet. I got too messed up, too lost. I was all over the place. I still am, really. I wanted it to end, wanted everything to be over recently. And it almost was. Almost went out in a blaze of glory. Almost did the impossible. But the only thing worse than a blooming “almost” is your mum finding you in your darkest corner, covered in god knows whose blood mixed with your own, out of your nutter, and trying to find the end. That’s the worst. It’s still the worst. I’m still here, too, and that’s bad itself. “Almost” can kiss my arse right about now.

*Waves.*

I haven’t been around like I said I would. But I came around long enough to just say Duchess Kate had her princess. And that means a lot to me. Okay. Bye again.

Existing is a thing, I hear.

Wait. What?

I used to be great.

Remember when I used to be really loud?

You know how people sometimes say "I fell off the wagon" or something like that? Well, I did but. But not in a metaphorical or deep meaning way. I found an actual wagon, sat on it, then fell off it. Then got back on it and fell off again. And the second time I hurt myself on the shoulder. So I fell off the wagon and I have a chip on my shoulder now. I'm a proper walking metaphor.

Life is weird. Why is it weird? Stop being weird.

Shh.

And here I thought that promises weren't made to be broken. I think I'm officially over it for now.