mimi

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

Evil wizard tasteful pin-up magazine but it's all photos of like, skinny old goths coyly fingering cursed amulets, long-bearded sorcerers doing the 'oopsie' pose as their corrosive destruction spell destroys enough of their own robes to show some skin, naked desiccated lich king positioning his staff of human skulls just so it leaves something to the imagination, dark knights in full armor just holding their soul-eating blades out in front of their codpieces, orc chieftain who did not understand the assignment and is posing with a monster he killed like one of those guys-with-fish photos. Or maybe he DID understand the assignment. Hmm.

@evilwizard are you in that?

i should sell this

my mutuals will have me saying the weirdest shit. but in a friendly way. uh yeah we ARE kissing with tongue. what about it. yes we’re having lesbian sex WHAT ABOUT IT!!!! MY MUTUALS GET ALL OF ME

a CEO walks into his office “any messages?” he asks his assistant “two anons want to know who tom petty is and one just says ‘post your ballsack’” “got it. check my dashboard” “that skeleton gif you like is back again” he rubs his chin pensively “mm. reblog that”

okay so me and my ex girlfriend (/positive…shes great) have been talking again (hanging out soon heh.) and she like was all touchy and flirty the first time we saw each other in like months (yesterday night) and i feel like such a little loser reading into things too much cuz she literally just posted letter home by childish gambino on her instagram and im geeking bc brrro. that shits about me i swear. i broke up with her two years ago but damn i want that back BAD. you’re the only girl that i have ever wanted, every other girl is just trying to be you FUCKKK DONT PLAY WITH ME WOMAN!!!! IM WEAK IM WEAK AND SHES SO HOT

hi guys good news she wants me (told me herself) and shes coming over on Saturday to stay the night 🤤🤤

i love nothing more to play the sims 4 for an entire day with no worries :)))

Young dumb and full of red 40