nothing

I am 11 days away from being in Thailand for 3 months. I’ve had an incredible trip but gosh I’ve also had one of the worst trips of my entire life. I genuinely feel so lost right now and I just need a hug and a cry and I can’t have that because I’m alone. I did meet someone on the island I was just on and I stayed for an extra 3 weeks because I liked him so much (familiar…) but I felt I was doing something wrong and I fled the fucking island in a panic. I don’t understand myself anymore and I thought this trip I was going to but I feel so lost, I feel so alone and so empty and I don’t know how to fix that.

It’s always “I want to fuck” until I open my mouth hahhahahahahahahah seriously leave me alone universe, please just please leave me alone