Underthoughts 2.0

Vanilla (UT Sans) PLATONIC

Sans is like the uncle you don’t mind showing up for Thanksgiving with a hangover. And with ketchup being his drink, you can handle that.

He will give you crumpled napkins with cheesy (and cheese stained) puns written in stolen pens.

His favorite prank to pull on you is the infinite loose handshake. He fills his jacket full of plastic skeleton arms, and every time he gives a handshake, it’s a fake hand. He can do it up to 14 times. 15 if Papyrus hadn’t gone mental by then.

ROMANTIC

He likes doodling hearts on your fries with ketchup. Will doodle butts on your burgers with the pickles as the cheeks.

When he wants to, he’ll pack you some lunches with some stale Valentine pretzel bags or grab snacks that have the puns printed on the bags. He loves it when you bring the wrappers home so he can copy them down in his joke book. 

Thinks he’s so funny, he will wake you up at 2am with a half-cooked joke that he can’t finish cause he’s dying.

Peppermint (UT Papyrus) PLATONIC

He tosses you in the air and then chucks you. Somehow you are never harmed. He likes tossing you around like a football, and he’s never once flubbed or dropped you.

Loves inviting you to the cooking club, which includes: massive fires, Undyne getting time out, and really yummy pastries. 

Likes holding your hand if he sees something interesting! You better be ready to run a marathon when he moves towards his item of interest.

ROMANTIC

Makes you spaghetti for your first date, and from there the pasta variety goes wild. You even got vanilla ice cream with thick strawberry sauce to act like “frozen spaghetti”.

He falls asleep when you rub circles in the side of his skull, it’s very soothing and he’s thankful when you abuse that power to make him have a full night’s rest.

ROSE BUSHES SHAPED LIKE HIS HEAD. ALL OVER YOUR YARD.

Sharktooth (UF Sans) PLATONIC

Sharktooth has never had a legit friend that didn’t want to kill him. So a squishy human like yourself is going to be a challenge. He starts with the dead puppy jokes.

Tried to learn near everything you like, has an entire notebook filled with chicken scratch that even he can’t read. But you write some fun plans that you deny having put in the notebook when he wasn’t looking.

Shows you his Underground and seems at ease knowing the place is too empty to be any danger to you. Shows you his old Grillby’s (Fabio) place and ransacks it for leftover sauce packets.

ROMANTIC

The Grillby plan, but he brings actual food from his flame’s surface establishment and rigs the old jukebox to give you the experience of a normal night after his sentry shifts.

Insists you wear his jacket, even when it’s barely 60 degrees (Fahrenheit). But will steal your coat if you don’t accept his.

Likes leaving candy in all corners fo your house, if for him or you, you both like reaching into an old vase and pulling out a pack of Twizzlers for movie night.

Angster (UF Papyrus) PLATONIC

The human s/o must train with him every day you don’t work. He makes the friend rules, and you will follow them.

Knits you a sweater in the same shade as his scarf cape and makes you wear it when it gets cold out. Did you forget it at home? Oh that’s too bad, he knitted you 5 more pairs and they’re all shoved in his emergency backpack.

Always comes to you looking for new puzzles. Even the tiny jigsaw puzzles, he’ll rob you for them.

ROMANTIC

Tries to treat s/o like royalty so often he forgets that he has a life outside of his partner. Oops.

He’ll try new dishes to force feed you when it looks like you’re hungry. He likes to make a cherry pie for you, will eat it if you’re allergic, and then make a lasagna.

UT Sans / Vanilla

To think his day was going to have angry “harmless” anti-monster protesters flood the monster-safe business square the day you wanted to get some more nice cream.

It wasn’t too bad, until one of the “harmless” protesters say you and Vanilla together and pulled a knife.

The knife was most likely aimed towards him. He wasn’t ready to die, and he had barely a second to recognize his inevitable death.

Luckily you stepped in, unluckily- you were stabbed.

It was even worse when you fell down, scaring everyone human and monster alike as your body crumpled to ash. Even the stabber was scared shitless!

But this wasn’t real right!? Humans don’t die like monsters! Vanilla didn’t want to believe his s/o was gone, not like this!

The police had rushed in by then, the stabber being pointed out by the monsters who were close enough to watch their favorite comedian lose his mate.

Lo and behold after a few minutes for Vanilla to mourn, the ash starts moving. And you basically regrow a new body in under a minute.

You’re naked, you’re angry. You have a crying skeleton on your hands and you have no clue where the jerk with the knife went. 

Needless to say, you got a lot of explaining to do.

US Sans / Lu

The days spent on the surface has always been Lu’s favorite! He can see his new human friends, he can see what new ingredients he’ll cook with, check out the cool firetruck that passes down his s/o’s street, visit his s/o and their blazing home-

Your house is on fire.

Your house is on fire.

Lu is a short bluescreen and on the scene screaming for your name. The firefighters on the scene are holding him back as parts of your home collapse into the flames.

His voice is hoarse as the flames are at their highest and their lowest. It’s after the light of day is gone and the street lights dare when Drizzle is able to leave his shift and hurry to his brother. Lu is stiff to the touch.

You never picked up your phone, he has no clue if you were in there or if you left your phone at home... but Lu knows. He knows but he doesn’t want to accept it.

The burnt mound that remained of his s/o and your home is what’s left. He couldn’t use any gifts or moments to replace you. 

He’s only allowed anywhere on site after the ok is given by the firefighters that the ground won’t burn through his boots. But he doesn’t care, he wants to find you. Even if it’s the tiniest trinket he can hold onto.

Lu traverses the burnt tomb and comes into the kitchen and finds...  a peculiar pile of dust. Or- is it ash? It looks too clean to be part of the house.

He barely gets a good look at it when it starts to wriggle. Holy-

You started out as a small bean of skin and hair and- you regrew as a nakey human. Looking not a day older than... how old you are right then.

Now you see Lu and- 

“The oven exploded.” Ah, that explains... everything.

Lu is shocked and you, a naked human(?) now have to explain to your boney boyfriend why the hell you emerged from a pile of ash like you haven’t died from an oven explosion and fire that destroyed your entire house.