Sweater Magic

this was 20 years ago and nothing’s changed

Unfortunately

I feel like the Simpsons has predicted the future several times.

Subliminal and comedic conditioning

^

Why?

it’s a nigga at your girl job laughing at all her jokes you said was corny.

ya girl like him..she think he would make a good friend..they exchange numbers you just clueless.

he don’t like the same people she don’t like at work.. he texting her gifs and jordan crying memes..she love texting him he text back so fast unlike you.

she go out with her coworkers after work to get a drink like always.. but this time she invite him.. he just so funny.. everybody like him you at home losing in 2k.

you text her “wya it’s getting late”.. she look at your text like 🙄 because she don’t want the fun to stop…she think nobody see her..HE see’s her tho..he always see’s her.

she get home and y'all get into a big argument.. she go to work the next day still upset..he notices and asks her what’s wrong..she say nothing she tryna walk away… he grabs her hand and looks her in the eyes…“what’s wrong?” ya girl just break down in his arms and crying all in the break room.

a week go by yall still being distant..yall watching daredevil..well she not paying attention she on Instagram..he text her “you watching Love & Hip Hop? lol”.. he seem so perfect.

she keep smiling in her phone..you ask her whats so funny? you snatch her phone and see his name.. she got him saved as “Rick 😂🙃💼” your stomach just start hurting.

she tell you he’s just a friend from work..she putting it all on you saying you been real insecure lately.. you yelling and holding back tears..ya nose start running..Rick just texted her a link to the new Beyonce song.

you text the group chat..“we need to get up this weekend..#savagelife” whole week yall not talking..you go out that friday night and don’t tell her.. you waiting for her to blow up your phone just so you can ignore her call..but she don’t call.. you start drinking everything.

ya homies all hype and having a good time dancing n shit.. you sitting down tho by the window looking at the stars..all you can think about is Rick 😂🙃💼 blowing your queen back out.. you start thinking you overreacted..she wouldn’t do that..ya phone vibrate..“i dont think this is working out..”

you call her and she not answering.. she drunk text back “im at Dave & Busters wth my co-wokrrs yhd”…. she been asking for y'all to go to Dave & Busters for a minute now.. you think it was her idea..but nah…it was Ricks.. ya limbs just collapse…meanwhile Rick just got ya queen a big polar bear with all the tickets he won.

she come home tipsy..you ask her why she tryna throw everything away for this nigga.. she sighs.. then responds..“i just haven’t been happy..and this has nothing to do with Ricky he’s just my friend from work” ……Ricky? ..you throw up again.

you tell her this is all stupid.. ask her if things can just go back to how they were.. you making promises to get yall back to how it was that first summer..she start crying you start crying..yall start kissing and touching.. you put ya hand up her skirt to take her panties off but they not there..ya stomach start milly rocking.

you mad now..Rick fucking ya life up..she tell you she never where panties with this skirt but you ain’t tryna hear that shit.. you ask “where Ricky live” ya voice breaking cuz you hurt..she say “im not gonna tell you, you need to calm down” but…how she know where he live? a tear start falling but you catch it.

you real mad now.. she tell you she only know because he couldn’t drive home and her friend dropped him off.. you ask her where he live again.. she ask you “why..what you gonna do?” you start putting ya du-rag on and picking up ya keys off the dresser.. she say “baby Rick is 6'5” you start taking ya du-rag off and you place ya keys back on the dresser how they was.

you not being a bitch tho..you tell her you just gonna whoop his ass tomorrow.. you realize you been drinking crying and throwing up all night so you dehydrated and malnourished and you think it’d prolly be smarter if you ate something and got a good nights sleep before you battle a starting small forward for your queen. you not being a bitch tho on mama you not.

you tell her stop texting Rick..you tryna get some sleep but you hurt..next day you surprise her when she leaving work.. you in the parking lot doing pushups no shirt on and game planning while waiting for Rick to come out..“he prolly not even 6'5 forreal forreal” you tryna build ya confidence up..mid jumping jack you see him come out looking like a superhero..you start putting ya shirt back on realizing ya gameplan was trash because you forgot ya back been hurting lately so you really honestly don’t have that power behind ya jab like you thought you did..but you leave the cape out on your durag for confidence and intimidation purposes still.

he walking by..you add a little bass in ya voice to make ya voice sound deeper..“ ya name rick?” he respond..“YEA” his voice deep but his naturally just like that..“stop talking to my girl bro before we have problems” he step to you and says “WHAT” ya knee buckles..you concerned about ya knee now because it never did that before.

you repeat yaself..you ain’t notice but a crowd starts forming..“Rick everything ok?” somebody ask..ya girl appears..she says “baby what are you doing here get in the car” you looking real crazy now..Rick say “listen to ya girl” you wish he hadn’t said that because now you gonna look like a bitch if you get in the car..you try to do the turn around punch they do in the movies but this ain’t the movies..you hit him but it aint enough..everything is all bad for you..all bad..you just sick thinking about all the corny jokes you shoulda just laughed at.

Mf perfect

HONOR!!!

Still haven’t seen this movie

its the best movie ever

What is this movie? Wtf

Fight me best movie of all time

The greatest movie of all time.

Bruh

Is this movie about an autistic savant?