Hi again

i think ive drowned so deep that swimming is useless

cant recognize myself anymore. Minutes pass by as i stare at my hands. i count my veins one by one and suddenly loose myself in them. Recount recount recount. Over and over again. The disgust i feel about myself i just cant put it into words. And now i find myself typing helpless words, word by word i realize how logic and sense is nowhere to be found. After a deep breath shame and guilt catches up to me and i stop

take me away from me

i have nothing to be but everything to give that youll want from me

its not love neither attention ones truly looking for, its just to be seen without being beautiful and touched without being nacked

ive become the person i ran away from now we walk hand in hand

zor

giving love comes so easy but receiving it feels so wrong

suddenly i realized i was breathing, i was alive

funny how i turned from „wow there is just nothing you cant do“ to „you really need help“

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