may i ask for a analysis on why you think reed has moral ocd if thats ok?
I know in technical aspects, he wasn't written with a disorder but his inner monologues are, like, scarily accurate to the symptoms. Really, it's hard to name one thing reed isn't having.
Does Reed have (Moral) OCD?
First of all, I am not a psychologist or an expert in OCD in any way. My research and information for this post comes from a few websites I’ve read + behavior I’ve witnessed from other people (like friends) who have (varying subtypes of) OCD. Some friends suspect I may have it too, so some of the info here is from personal experience, but I won’t explicitly claim that I for sure have it. The disorder is very diverse and not every person with it will exhibit symptoms the same way.
For future reference, important terms to remember for OCD are obsessions and compulsions.
Obsessions are the distressing, unwanted, intrusive thoughts, while compulsions are the actions, opposing thoughts, or “rituals” done to relieve the anxiety of these thoughts.
Some of my sources (others are directly linked within text):
https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/what-is-moral-ocd-signs-symptoms-and-treatment
It can be argued that many forms of OCD come down to a fear that lack of vigilance could lead to a loss of identity. One with Harm OCD may w
OCD is a mental health condition. It causes thoughts called obsessions, anxiety, and actions called compulsions. People with OCD feel stuck
“Am I a bad person?” Moral OCD can turn that question into a painful loop. Learn why these fears happen and how treatment can help.
Second, since tumblr has an image limit of only ~10 pics (on mobile at least…) I had to edit my evidence together and purposefully exclude some pieces of text from the novel that would support my analysis. I think I have enough evidence anyway lol … all pictures of text are taken in order of when they are shown in the book, so the first image is from earlier in the book, and vice versa.
Even before Reed locks Julius up, he’s already thinking about morals, right / wrong, the rules, consequences. He’s only hesitant because he’d be in trouble, because he’d be SEEN as the one in the wrong.
And then on the bus, when Reed heard Shelly reading about torture methods, his immediate thought is “does she know what I’ve done?” Not that his friend, who he knows loves reading, is researching the topic, but instead is sending hints that she knows something he did.
A common irrational fear among people with OCD is worrying that others are reading the person’s thoughts. This is more distressing if the person is having horrible intrusive thoughts at this moment.
As Shelly continues reading about torture aloud, the worry of if Reed was committing torture sprouts. Had Shelly read a different book, or not read aloud, Reed would not have started dwelling on and obsessing over this concept for the remainder of the story. Not that it’s all entirely Shelly’s fault. when looking out the bus window, all he can think about is Julius being tortured.
Reed thinks about how he shouldn’t have “lower[ed] himself to the level of Julius’ meanness,” which is a very clear display of him pondering whether he’s “good” or “bad.” A good person wouldn’t stoop to Julius’ level!
Reed the assures himself that, no, he can’t be as bad as Julius. That’s absurd. Julius is a bully and intentionally hurt Pickle. If anything, this is just justice! Julius getting a taste of his own medicine! It was either Julius or him!
Ok, for starters, the key takeaway from Moral (Scrupulosity) OCD specifically is the fear of whether or not one is a good person, or doing the right thing. Throughout the ENTIRE story (not just these passages) Reed is trying to reason with his mind on whether or not he is the worst person in the world for getting revenge on Julius.
When Reeds hears Shelly read aloud about torture, the obsession (intrusive thought) of Julius being in unimaginable agony manifests, and keeps persisting.
Again, Reed starts thinking Shelly might be able to read his thoughts, or at least knows what he did. It wouldn’t be logical to jump to this conclusion, because reading thoughts is not a real thing human can do, and Shelly was not present nor anywhere near Reed and Julius when the event happened … but that’s just how OCD works. It doesn’t have to make sense to scare you. It rarely does. Reed even assures himself that this silly thought of his can’t possibly be true, it’s all just a coincidence!
He assures himself even more that he’s actually not torturing Julius and it’s not as bad as he’s making it seem! Julius is just restrained in his school project, it’s not like he was forced inside the brazen bull. He even tries distracting himself by talking with his friends, but it doesn’t really work when the topic being discussed is .. torture ….
Reed feels guilty again. He’s now feeling compelled to go back and save Julius. His plan to leave Julius overnight is too cruel, just a few hours would be better, right? It’s not like Reed would be torturing Julius by making him sit alone for a few hours, right?
Then, at the Girard house, his unwanted thoughts crawl back. How COULD he have forgotten what he had done? And now the anxiety is worsened tenfold upon remembering the mess with Pickle’s robot and Julius’ exosuit.
Another common characteristic of OCD is the person going through a bunch of “what ifs” —
“What if I left the stove on? What if I left my silverware on my plate in the microwave? What if someone is spying on me through my device’s camera? What if my parents were in a car crash and that’s why they’re not home yet?”
Reed cycles through many “what ifs” several times in the story;
“What if it had crashed into something the way Pickle’s robot has just crashed into the hearth? What if it was spinning in circles right now?”
After these “what ifs,” Reed then goes to Pickle for reassurance from someone besides himself. Seeking reassurance from another in a time of doubt or fear is natural, but sometimes it just makes obsessions worse.
For example; Someone with OCD is worrying they left a candle burning at home, and asks a friend to go in their house to check if it’s been extinguished. The friend goes to the home, sees the candle is off, and tells the person such. The person may initially feel relieved hearing this, but then may start worrying again after the reassurance. Is my friend lying and planning to let my home set aflame? Did they check the wrong candle? Is it possible for candles to reignite spontaneously? What if they’re using this as an opportunity to steal from my home? Et cetera.
But then, after getting the reassurance he wanted, Reed is reminded of the little robot, and therefore is reminded of Julius in the exosuit.
Reed then again tries to distract himself from his obsessions by talking to his friends. This doesn’t really work, because he’s still mentally going through hundreds of “what ifs.”
This is tricky because a few sources I’ve read about distracting oneself from their obsessions contradict each other. One claims that distraction is just another form of a compulsion — doing an action to push the bad thoughts away — but another claims distracting oneself is fine.
From what I’ve read, fully distracting oneself isn’t really ideal. It’s probably best for Reed to just let the thoughts exist and then pass. See things as how they are, not what they could be. Julius is just locked in the classroom, and that’s all he knows.
Once again, Shelly’s reading triggers his intrusive thoughts of torture and if he’s truly a bad person.
“What if Julius was being tortured right now?”
For the hundredth time, seeing the little robot run around and shift flexibly reminds Reed of his obsessions and makes him spiral further.
He tries reassuring himself AGAIN that he can’t possibly be hearing Julius’ bones breaking and popping, it’s just not logical. Pickle assured him the remote’s range can’t reach the school. He’s just imagining it.
Reed then has a moment of high self-awareness. He realizes his irrational fears don’t make sense. People with OCD are well aware that their obsessions are “stupid” and “asinine,” and this awareness makes the need to keep obsessions a secret stronger. Reed can’t just tell the Girards he thinks Julius is now a cyborg-zombie waiting outside the house to kill him. He KNOWS it sounds ridiculous.
Being aware of how unreasonable one’s obsessions are doesn’t (always) make someone feel better, though. Reed still feels horrible, like he’s sick, like he’s done something very, very wrong. He wonders if his brain knows something he doesn’t. Even if it is “stupid.”
Reed then feels the compulsion to run all the way home, then bike to school, then free Julius. It’s the right thing to do.
He even starts thinking of the specifics of the plan, like the key hidden in a fake rock he could use to sneak into the basement. Then he starts dwelling more on what’d happen when he actually got there. More “what ifs”
When the robots hits the model of the house and Reed hears a thud outside, he looks to the twins, not where the sound was, for reassurance. He can’t be the only one who heard it, right? They heard it too, right? He’s not hearing things that aren’t there, is he?
Reed’s reassurance-seeking does not work. The twins don’t even flinch. So, he’s left to his anxieties once again. He’s now compelled to focus on listening for irregular or unusual noises outside. He goes through more “what ifs” about the noises outside, and the robot smashing into the miniature house.
“What if it was Julius out there? What if he truly had been manipulated by Pickle’s remote all this time?..”
Reed unfortunately has a very vivid and detailed imagination. This is a detrimental combination when paired with OCD. Worrying about something bad happening is already stressful, but being able to perfectly picture the obsession happening is terrifying.
Reed can’t believe he’s the only one that notices the repeating thudding and thumping outside. A compulsion one might feel when fearing a potential threat is checking and being hyper-aware of their surroundings. If someone’s out to get me, why would I let my guard down? They could be creeping right behind this corner, or making footsteps I can only hear if I focus.
Reed also tries avoiding going outside altogether, fearing that the Julius-thing is out there. He’s doing everything in his power to avoid directly facing the threat. Forever.
Again, a “what if” crosses his mind — What if all the windows and doors weren’t locked?
One more time, Reed starts hearing things outside and associating them with the robot, which is associated with Julius being tortured in the exosuit. His attempts to distract himself only work for a moment, temporarily convincing himself that it might just be a raccoon. This is short-lived, of course.
He feels like he’s going insane from all these horrible thoughts and compulsions and “what ifs” running through his brain at 100mph. He considers that, maybe, he’s just going crazy from the guilt of being as bad as Julius. The thought of doing something wrong, even to someone who might deserve it, puts a pit in his stomach.
“What reason . . . Besides his uncontrollable need to know if something was clutching onto the exterior walls of the house by the second-floor windows?”
Okay now this is just getting ridiculous. This has to be one of the most blatant pieces of evidence for this. Compulsions are uncontrollable needs / urges. Reed is feeling compelled to check something over and over again to make sure his fears are made up.
Reed accepts that the guilt from his actions is what’s really making him feel sick. He’s a horrible person, he’s a monster, he’s no better than Julius. None of the Girards would do something so cruel, regardless of how mean Julius was.
Reed feels awful at the mere thought of being bad. The people who he loves (and who love him back) would never do this. He reprimands himself for his actions (or lack thereof). If only he went back and saved Julius! None of this would be happening! He fights with himself internally again. Is he losing his mind, or is he just very aware?
When upstairs, Reed doesn’t even know what he’d do if (or when) he finally faced Julius. Then, a particular detail I thought was very interesting is brought up. Reed notices the colors Shelly’s room, and a flashback about one of the colors symbolizing purity is presented. The concept of purity zipping into Reed’s mind during all of this is very … interesting. Purity is all about goodness, virtues, innocence … and at the same moment Reed is worrying about if he’s a good person or not. Maybe a literary coincidence, maybe not.
Reed is haunted by the vivid imagery of a bloody, mangled Julius for the umpteenth time. No matter how many times he tries telling himself he’s just imagining things, the thoughts still manage to come crawling back worse than before.
When exploring Pickle’s bedroom, Reed is forced to think of another problem. Going downstairs, if he even could. Something as simple as bloody tissues makes Reed start thinking of being hunted and killed all over again, like some kind of sick domino effect.
Bloody tissues > Pickle’s nose was bleeding > Reed has to remind him to ice it > Reed has to go downstairs > He can’t go downstairs if there’s something waiting for him up here.
And then Reed has the urge to know for sure if there’s something there. I’m sure many people are familiar with the concept of someone w/ OCD having to check things over and over and over and over.
That’s what Reed is doing. Moral OCD includes doing a compulsion excessively (ex: praying an unusual amount of times to be forgiven for sins), but it is not exclusive to Moral OCD specifically. He MAKES himself go to the hallway and continue searching. The wording here if specific. He didn’t just go to search, he had to force himself to.
Reed is hyper - aware of his surroundings and situation, again. He starts fearing for the worst. Somethings could be out there, and it’ll turn out very bad for him if true. Another “what if” sneaks in about Julius attacking him.
He tries rationalizing his fears. What sense would it make for Julius to be hiding and waiting for the right moment to pounce? But now he’s just fighting with his brain again! Why would Julius suddenly turn into a blood-thirsty monster? If Reed’s earlier fears were true, he’d be dead, and dead people … are dead! He’s just a kid, why would he do that?
And then he moves to rationalizing his actions instead. Well, even if Julius was hurt, he’s still not a good person at all. He might’ve deserved it. He’s not JUST “a kid.”
Reed later unintentionally distracts himself from his intrusive thoughts by thinking of Shelly fingerprinting, and inspecting the robot in the mini-house. This brief moment is one of the few times Reed feels calm and relieved from his anxieties.
Of course, we know his fears were true all along, but that doesn’t mean reading him as someone with (most likely undiagnosed) Moral OCD can’t be allowed.
I really doubt he was intentionally written to have OCD, or specifically the moral subtype, but it’s hard to deny the comparisons. The similarities are uncanny!
At the end of the day, people are allowed to headcanon characters to have or be or do whatever, but I think this analysis of Reed’s character in particular is very interesting.
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