papa bless

my T start date was 22/01/18

refused again. this is the third time. they call me in for an appointment with "yes, we'll inject you" just for me to come in to be told they're not doing it. god forbid someone's trans in my hometown in my local gp. you'll just be screwed over and over again to the point of not being at all excited for hormones. they know i'm mentally ill, self harm and have a past suicide attempt, and current suicidal thoughts, but wtf would they care about that when they can make me feel worse !!! i have my t vial. had it since 26th last month. it has a shelf life, it's gonna go past the date before i actually get a genuine yes and a genuine appointment to get it injected and then i'll have to wait another fkn month for it to be ordered why am i carrying on with this transition is my question my local gp surgery think it's a joke and i know my next appointment will be a refusal so why the fuck, after 4 years of doctors and 2 diffferent gics, an i still carrying on my mate got put on t a month after coming out to a clinic. mine's 4 years. that's gotta be a clear fucking sign