Mga Kalokohan ni Ginoong Tuttee

And when people ask me if the distance is the hardest part I will tell them that it’s not. I will tell them that the hardest part is not the time spent away from the one you love, but rather the time spent together. They will not understand. They will question why being together is harder than being apart,they will tell me that it makes no sense. And I will laugh. I will tell them that the two days or the two weeks or the two months you spend together are the cruelest part of a long distance love, because it only takes those two days to get into a routine. You become familiar with the way their smell lingers in your bed long after they’ve left it. You become familiar with the certainty that you won’t have to fall asleep alone tonight, or wake up to an empty bed tomorrow. You become familiar with their palm in yours, ready to tackle whatever today has to offer. You become familiar with the way they look all 24 hours of the day, whether it’s groggily smiling at 6am or messily playful at 2pm. You become familiar with a kiss that is planted on your lips, rather than being blown from a phone screen two countries away. But familiarity is a luxury that long distance love can’t afford. We don’t get to have routines and moments we’ve become ‘used to’. Instead we get laughs that echo long after they’ve disappeared and indents in our bed of a body that once held us and imprints on our hearts of smiles that moved us. Distance will never be easy, but they don’t know hard love until they are lying in bed at four in the morning reaching for someone whose scent is the only thing that remains. I will tell them all of this. They will not understand. I can only hope that they never have to.