playing pretend

It was like he knew because suddenly your phone vibrated that you had held in your hand. Unlocking the screen, you smiled when you opened the text. It was a photo of Seunghyun on his video shoot. The unbuttoned white shirt, the suspenders, the duct tape he was holding — he looked so good. You bit your lip, staring at the photo. Maybe you could have a little fun.

Since you were having a lazy day, you were only wearing one of Seunghyun’s oversized sweaters and your panties which gave you an idea. As you padded through the apartment, you stopped as your eyes spotted the chair he’d used in the Desperado video he’d filmed a couple of weeks ago. Of course he’d brought it home. That man had an obsession with chairs. You could use that to your advantage. With a grin on your face, you sat yourself down on the chair, straddling it like he had in the music video — you’d been on set that day so you knew everything about it. Then, you pulled your phone out, angling the shot perfectly and sent it to him with the caption ‘bring the duct tape home’. It was barely seconds before you had a reply.

Will be home in about ten minutes. Be on that chair when I get in.

A thrill went through you as you read the words on your screen. Time seemed to tick by slowly as you waited, turning around to sit on the chair properly. When you heard the front door open, you shivered with anticipation. What you didn’t expect was him to walk into the room still in the outfit from the photo he’d sent you. He was so damn sexy, the way his shirt was unbuttoned at the top, his hair a little messy and god, the holster — your thoughts ran crazy but what caught your eye the most was the duct tape in his hands. So he had listened to you.

Seunghyun kept his eyes locked on you, a devious glint in them as he spoke. “Sending me a photo of you sitting like that on this chair while I’m at work… were you trying to get me worked up?”

“I was bored,” you replied nonchalantly. “Don’t tell me that innocent little photo got you all hard now, baby.”

“Oh, it did and you’re about to pay for it,” he said with a smirk. “Now, be a good girl and put your hands behind the chair.”

You obeyed immediately, placing your arms behind the chair. Your eyes were glued to him as you eagerly watched him pull the tape out, moving behind you to wrap around your wrists, keeping you tied to the chair. He made sure it wasn’t too tight; the last thing he wanted to do was hurt you. Once he was happy with it, he threw the roll of tape on to the floor, moving to stand back in front of you. He leaned over you, using one hand to pull the tie from his face. “Up for a little fun, baby?”

You nodded your head. Whatever he had in store, you were more than game for. The confidence oozing from him was ever present now, it was so attractive. The Seunghyun from a few years ago would never even dream of being this bold. Not that your sex life had ever been boring but since he’d come back into himself, he had upped his game. Now, with the tie in his hand, he stuffed it into your mouth, tying it around the back of your head. His fingers grasped your chin, lifting your head up to meet his eyes. “I don’t want to hear a sound out of you, okay? The second I hear anything from that pretty mouth of yours, I’ll stop.”

All you could do was nod your head, watching as he got on his knees in front of you, his hands spreading your legs apart. His fingers trailed up your thighs until they reached the waistband of your panties, hooking into the fabric. He tugged them off you, tossing them to the floor without a care in the world. Then, as if to torture you on purpose, he began trailing kisses all the way up from your ankle and along up to your inner thigh. He couldn’t help himself as he bit down, sucking to mark up your thighs. The hardest thing in the world at that moment was to not make any noise, his movements so deliberately sensual, driving you crazy. When his lips finally reached where you wanted him the most, pressing a kiss right above your clit, you bucked your hips. But, he tapped your thigh lightly, glaring up at you.

“Stay still or I’ll stop,” he said, his tone commanding. “You know how to be a good girl, don’t you? Then, do it.”

When he was sure you were going to stay still, he finally dove back in between your legs, dragging his tongue all the way from your entrance up to your clit. He groaned as he tasted you. Seunghyun threw your legs over his shoulders, leaning back in. His lips wrapped around your clit, sucking, causing you to writhe which earned another tap to your thigh. He let that one go, his tongue moving along your folds with expertise. When he reached your entrance, he pushed his tongue inside, pulling back out to move back up to flick at your clit.

“You taste so fucking good, princess,” he panted, sealing his lips back around your clit. He could tell you were close with the way your chest was moving rapidly with ragged breaths. “Come on, cum for me, baby. I know you want to.”

The vibrations of his voice against you were sending you into overdrive, you could help the muffled whimper that fell from your lips. Immediately, he stopped, looking up at you with glistening lips. “Naughty girl,” he tutted. “Now you don’t get to cum until I say so.”

As if to punish you, he slowed the movements of his tongue, going ever so slowly. His fingers teased your entrance, slipping one finger inside, moving it slowly to join the movements of his mouth. You were on the edge, desperate to fly over it but he wasn’t going to let you. When he pushed another finger inside you, curling them just right, you felt like you were about to burst.

“Aw, do you want to cum? Should’ve behaved then, huh?” He taunted you, pumping his fingers faster, curling them just right each time to stroke that spot inside you that had you wanting to topple over into oblivion. When he felt your walls clenching around his fingers, he stopped, denying you your orgasm.

His tongue kept slowly working your clit, sucking and flicking with determination to drive you crazy. The frustration was evident in your eyes as he looked up at you with a smirk. God, if you could only move your hands and push his head down to make him go faster but, no. He had tied you to the damn chair. You didn’t dare trying to even wriggle out of the tape knowing that he’d deny you your release once again. Now, he sped up the movements of his fingers, never taking his eyes off you. Once again you reached the edge and, deciding you’d behaved enough, he nodded.

“Cum for me. Right now.”

It took that one simple command for you to fall apart. Your body tensed, your release coating his fingers and mouth but he didn’t let up, his tongue working overdrive on you, his fingers still thrusting into you at a rapid pace. He was determined to drive you straight into a second orgasm and it worked. You couldn’t help but cry out, the sound muffled by the tie in your mouth as you reached your second orgasm in record time.

“Good girl,” he praised, gentling his touches. He pressed a kiss to the top of your center, removing his fingers from you, gentle kisses along your thigh followed before he moved his hand up to your face. Instead of licking his fingers clean himself, he pulled the gag from around your mouth, pushing his fingers inside. “Clean up the mess you made.”

Your tongue swirled around his digits, his cock rock hard in his pants as you licked his fingers clean. It was so erotic, your body already craving more. “Such a good girl coming so hard for me. I think you deserve a reward, don’t you?”

He pulled his fingers from your mouth, standing up to claim your lips with his in a filthy, deep kiss. He held your chin in place, his other hand moving to remove the tape from your wrists, finally freeing you.

“Fuck,” you panted against his lips, chasing them when he pulled back.

He palmed himself through his pants, eyes locked onto you as he took in your expression — your flushed face, parted lips and the way you were still catching your breaeth back had him wanting to fuck you right then and there. “Go wait for me in the bedroom and take that fucking shirt off. I want to see all of you.”

You got to your feet on shaky legs, heading to the bedroom but not without a slap on the ass from him as you left. The moment you entered the bedroom, you pulled off your shirt, laying on the bed completely bare for him. It was a few minutes later when he walked in, undoing the buttons on his own shirt. He wasted no time in throwing it off, taking his time as you watched him remove his pants and boxers. He smirked, deciding to tease you a little more as he grasped his cock in his hand, stroking himself slowly.

“Beg for it,” he rasped, using all his self control to not pounce on you immediately. He needed to hear you say how much you wanted him.

“Please, Seunghyun. Fuck me, I’ll be a good girl just fuck me,” you whined, watching as he ran his own thumb against the tip of his cock, gathering his precum to glide his hand across his length easier.

“Legs up and spread,” he said, leaving you no room for arguments. You planted your feet on the bed, knees bent as you parted your legs for him. Seunghyung groaned at you on full display. “So fucking beautiful.”

He climbed on top of you, positioning himself at your entrance but he didn’t push in, not yet. He dragged his cock along your folds, gathering your slick. Each run of his cock made you whimper, needing to feel him inside you. “Please, baby, I’ll do anything.”

“Look at you, begging with no shame, you’re so desperate,” he pouted, mocking you. He pushed the tip of his length inside you just briefly before pulling out to move back along your folds. “Don’t worry, baby, I’ll give you exactly what you want.”

Then, when he lost all of his patience, he pushed into you, his cock sliding in with ease. He let out a guttural groan, holding himself still so he didn’t cum right then and there. You writhed, trying to get him to move but he held your hips firmly still. “Move, please, oh my god.”

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” he smirked, pulling all the way out before slamming back into you, setting a hard, fast pace from the get go. He pounded into you, the room filled with your moans and his groans. His lips claimed yours for just a second before moving down to capture one of your nipples, his tongue swirling around the sensitive bud.

“Fuck, oh my god, don’t stop,” you cried, your hands coming to tug at his hair. His pace was relentless, each drag of his cock sending you closer and closer to yet another orgasm.

He didn’t, instead, he speeded up leaving you crying out incoherent moans of his name. He was so close to the edge himself. His hands moved to wrap around your neck, squeezing lightly. Seunghyung loved it when you were like this, so submissive, ready to take anything that he gave you. “You want to cum, princess? I can tell your close, your pussy is squeezing me so fucking tight.”

“Yes, yes, please, can I?” You managed to breathe out, as he pulled one of your legs around his waist, deepening the angle of his thrusts. When he hit that spot inside you, it was game over but you waited for his approval.

“Yes,” he panted. “Cum all over my cock like a good girl.”

His name fell from your lips practically in a scream as you came harder than you ever had, your walls tightening around him but he didn’t give up, not yet. He kept thrusting into you, sloppily, his own release on the verge.

“Just like that,” he groaned, thrusting into you one more time before he came, spilling deep inside you. “Fuuuck.”

Seunghyun held your hips in place until he had filled you up, finally collapsing on top of you, his hand still on your throat. It was a few minutes before either of you could even speak, the room filled with nothing but your heavy breaths and pants. Finally, he lifted his head, moving his hand up to cup your cheek, speaking softly.

“Amazing,” you said dreamily, running your fingers through his hair.

He couldn’t help but laugh, kissing you softly. Gently, he pulled out of you, grabbing some tissues off the bedside to table to wipe up the mess he’d made. His touch was ever so gentle, a completely different contrast to the way he had just been fucking you. Tossing the tissue into the trash, he laid down beside you, scooping you up into his arms. He stroked your back, pressing soft kisses to the top of your head.

“That was…”

“Amazing.”

“Is that all you can say right now?” He teased.

“I think so,” you giggled, pressing your lips to his chest. “You made me speechless."

“Then I did my job right,” he smirked, cupping your cheek to bring your lips back to his. “We’ll have to do that again sometime.”

“How about next time I tie you up?” You mumbled.

“We’ll see.”

SEUNGCHEOL⠀★⠀he’s your boss.

the lock on the door clicks behind you, a spotlight on the bulge prodding your thigh as seungcheol drags you back against him — impatient, now that the turmoil in him has finally given way. 

“sir—”

“don’t call me that.” he rasps, hands fisting in your blouse. “not right now, please.” 

you melt into him as his lips find your neck, pressing your body flush against his. he squeezes desperately at your sides as he throbs in his pants — nothing like the composed, strict boss you know. 

“if i’m about to make this mistake,” he mutters at your jaw, fingers twitching just beneath the swell of your breasts. “i need to know you want it too.”

“we shouldn’t..” you whisper against his mouth. 

“i know.” he swallows. “tell me to stop, and i will.” 

your answer is to pull him in by his tie, and press your lips to his — months of tension breaking loose into a messy, desperate kiss. seungcheol groans as you lick into his mouth, grabbing your ass through the skirt and rolling you against his hard-on.

“take this off for me?” he sighs, leaking into his suit pants from the friction. “been wanting to taste you..”

JEONGHAN⠀★⠀you’re his friend’s crush.

“keep an eye on her,” he’d said. “make sure she gets home safe.” the words of his best friend had gone through one ear, and jeonghan can feel them leave out the other as your tongue explores his mouth. 

jeonghan had kept an eye on you under flashing red lights — heat bubbling in his gut with each sway of your hips — and when you approached him, drawling that you wanted to leave, who is he to break a promise? 

it’s not jeonghan’s fault that you’d climbed over the car’s centre console and plopped yourself in his lap. he’s not to blame, really, when his honest first response was to resist. 

“sweetheart, we shouldn’t.” he’d sighed, dazed eyes watching you rock gently on his lap. his cock fills out his pants eagerly, and he clenches his fists to hold back. “my best friend likes you.” 

you hummed, fingers threading through his hair. “but i don’t want him.” 

jeonghan lets go — of his grip, and his control — as he swallows your breath in a kiss. allows himself to grab your waist, guiding you to grind against his bucking hips. 

his groan melts onto your lips, length pulsing where it rubs into your ass. “i don’t want that either.”

JOSHUA⠀★⠀he's waiting for marriage.

the barrier of fabric between you both is soaked through at this point — joshua in his boxers, rutting into your panties as you kiss and grope each other desperately for god knows how long at this point. it’s not nearly close enough, but your fiancee’s been steadfast in his beliefs and in his patience. 

you get tangled up like this every night, and each time joshua insists that you sleep before things go too far, smiling despite the obvious tent in his pants. 

you think tonight will be not different — until joshua pulls back with a low whimper, eyes raking over your body with a ruined look. 

“shit,” he curses, swallowing your gasp as he kisses you rougher than before. “we should just do it.”

“but.. we can’t..” you trail off into a light moan as joshua sucks at your neck, a large hand coming to squeeze your breast. 

“i want you.” you feel the way his cock throbs at your heat. he chuckles. “really bad. i might die before the wedding. it hurts me to turn you down..”

his hand skims down your tummy, stopping at your panties to ghost over your clit. he smiles at how your hips buck. 

“let me?”

JUN⠀★⠀he’s your leading man.

jun licks a whine from your mouth as it rolls off your tongue, his clothed length rutting just right against the thin cotton of your underwear. he presses you further into the wall, the heat between you growing damper. 

you almost forgot that this is the same junhui: a quiet character, playful on a good day — but particularly cold to you and you alone. his leading lady. even with the cameras, he struggles in pretending to even tolerate your presence, and it’s making your job harder. 

how ironic, that when you finally asked him outright what his problem was, you shortly found yourself smothered by him in a desperate kiss. 

“shit—this is a bad idea,” jun groans out onto your lips, precum staining his pants as he mindlessly humps up into you. “why am i even doing this?”

yet, he makes no move to pull away, and you smirk. 

“don’t go falling for me,” you quip, cut off with a gasp as his tip prods your clit in a particularly rough thrust. he steals another kiss from you, and you whimper. “…we should stop.”

“i know.” jun mutters, adam’s apple bobbing in a gulp as he watches where your hips roll together. “but i can’t.” 

SOONYOUNG⠀★⠀he’s your brother’s best friend.

you muffle soonyoung’s moan with a kiss, your hand down the front of his pants and wrapping around his cock. the first stroke brings a loud squelch from the amount of precum coating his length, and soonyoung’s head lolls back in pleasure — knocking against the bathroom mirror.

you shush him, teeth nipping at his tongue as a warning, earning a whine in response. you stop the movements of your hand, but his pelvis just jolts upward, fucking himself into your fist.

“you need to be quiet,” you whisper-yell. your brother would break this door down, and break his best friend’s legs if he knew you were in here together. 

“i shouldn’t be doing this,” soonyoung says weakly, but puts no effort to stop. his cock pulses in your hand as you twist at the tip. “i know better.”

you roll your eyes — he wants to self reflect now? when he’s already this hard?

your breath hitches as he reaches for you, firmly cupping his hand over your crotch. he groans, conflicted. “i want you..”

“better make it quick.”

“won’t last anyways.” he tugs your pants down, sighing in relief at the sight of your bare pussy. “your brother’s gonna kill me…”

WONWOO⠀★⠀his friends can hear.

wonwoo tilts his head at you like a curious cat as you climb into his lap. he cranes his neck around you to not lose sight of the computer screen — there’s a whole woman on top of him, and his attention still is on the game. you feel even less remorse for what you’re about to do.

you grab his chin, forcing him to look down at you. 

“what are you—” wonwoo chokes as you lift your skirt up, presenting your bare pussy pressed to his crotch. muffled voices come from his headphones, and he clarifies that he’s talking to you. great, there’s company. 

you’re too pent-up to care, grinding against his now half-hard length, and wonwoo lets out a pained noise. 

he reaches for his headphones, intending to mute himself, but you grab his hand and guide it to your pussy instead. wonwoo’s breath hitches as you coat his fingers in your arousal. he raises his hips from the chair, rubbing his boner into your ass. you let out a light whine as his fingers tap your clit. 

“we shouldn’t...” he murmurs, yet gently lifts you for room to tug his pants down, cock springing free. “just stay quiet.”

JIHOON⠀★⠀you both work early.

jihoon hums appreciatively as you massage the aches from his back. it was almost midnight by the time he got home from work and quietly crawled into bed. after slouching at a desk all day, the feel of your soft hands on him — groping, caressing — felt like fucking heaven. 

you missed him like hell, and the little noises of relief he was letting out from the massaging were driving you up the wall. before you know it — you’re palming jihoon through his boxers, desperately grinding yourself onto the hand he’s got down the front of your pyjama pants. 

you’re both exhausted from the day, kept awake only by the pure need caused by this proximity. jihoon’s barely keeping his eyes open, but he’s so hard and you’re so wet under his fingers. 

“baby, we should go to bed..” he grumbles, letting out a breathy moan when you squeeze his base. “we both have early starts in the morning.”  

you whine in protest, jihoon drawing the sound out as his thumb nudges your clit. 

“you sleep, then.” you pull his cock out and roll on top of him. he doesn’t even lift a finger to stop you. 

he groans in defeat, lining himself up. “after.”

SEOKMIN⠀★⠀you just got dumped.

“w-wait a second—” seokmin sputters, not sure what to do with his hands as your own start to feel him up. 

you don’t respond as you squeeze his thighs, fingers creeping further to the growing bulge in his shorts. 

“this isn’t right, i can’t,” he lets out a startled moan as your face nuzzles into his neck, breath tickling him. 

“can’t what?” you ask, licking a stripe up his skin. 

seokmin sighs. “i can’t do this to you..”

he can’t find the strength to push you away though, so he just sits there, body silently begging you to touch him. 

he still sees a taken girl when he looks at you — a girl who belongs to someone else. as a matter of two hours ago though, that’s not true anymore. 

you’re supposed to be heartbroken, and he was supposed to be comforting you. but he can’t help the way his heart swells over you being so quick to make a move. 

“we’re not doing anything?” you giggle, fingers ghosting over his lap, catching the way his dick throbs.

seokmin takes one look at your lips, then throws all caution to the wind — leaning in to kiss you desperately. 

no harm if you’re not doing anything, right?

MINGYU⠀★⠀you babysit his kid.

you brace yourself with a hand on the wall, whining out among the lewd squelching filling the room, too embarrassed to look down at the source: mingyu’s mouth going to town between your thighs. 

you’ve orgasmed twice at this point, but he showed no intentions of stopping after the first came quick. you can feel his smirk pressed into your skin as he laps at you like a dog, fucking only a single finger into your hole and it still being enough to fill you up. 

there hadn’t been any words, not since he’d asked if you’d seen his son to bed. you nodded, intending for him to pay you and send you on your way — not corner you and drop to his knees.

you squeak as mingyu hollows his cheeks to suck your clit, the sparks of a third orgasm rushing quickly into your gut. 

“m-mr. kim,” you whimper, earning a smug chuckle to rumble on your clit. 

“what is it, pretty?” 

“we should stop..” 

you’re taken aback when he listens, licking his lips as he pulls away. 

“if that’s what you want.”

you swallow, noticing his other hand gripping himself through the pants. then, you softly shake your head — and he smirks.

“turn around for me.”

MINGHAO⠀★⠀he’s looking after you.

“hm?” minghao lets you pull him down to the bed, and you wrap your arms around his waist. “did you need anything else?” 

he gently strokes your hair, smiling fondly at how you’re clinging to him. it’s been dark days as of late — and minghao’s been here to support you through it. carrying you to the shower when you can’t leave bed, spoonfeeding you since you’d rather starve. 

he doesn't need any thanks. not every best friend might go to those lengths, but minghao does because he loves you. 

minghao’s body freezes when he feels your mouth pressing kisses to his open palm. you try to pry his thighs open, and he stops you with a gentle hand on your face.

“we shouldn’t do this..” he sighs. “not because i don’t want you, but… it isn’t right. not now.”

you pout at him, resting your head in his lap as your fingers slide to his crotch. despite his reluctance, he’s already half-hard.

“i want to feel good,” you palm at him, and he just barely whimpers. “please?”

minghao’s weak to the way your eyes plead at him. he relents, pulling you up for a kiss and savouring your lips on his for the first time.

“if it makes you feel better.”

SEUNGKWAN⠀★⠀you’re at a party.

“tell me you’re mine.” seungkwan rasps, crooking two of his fingers up into your pussy. you squeak out the words, your entire body buzzing with heat over this unfamiliar side of your loving boyfriend. 

seungkwan’s angry, has been since he pulled you into this bathroom by the arm, shutting out the rest of the party as he pushed you against the locked door. 

you’re trying your best to stay quiet — but it seems like he wants to provoke you into making noise as his thumb swipes at your clit and his fingers fuck into your g-spot, uncaring for whoever hears. 

“boo,” you whimper, insanely attracted to him. “we shouldn’t.. not here..”

seungkwan clicks his teeth, ripping his hand away. he steals your lips in a harsh kiss, licking into your mouth like he’s trying to prove a point — which he gets when your hips buck, chasing his touch. 

you moan in surprise as he rubs his tip through your folds. you’re so worked up that you hadn’t even realised he pulled his cock out. 

“i’m not going to hold back, so don’t you either.” he bites at your lower lip, and you just melt. “i want that fucker to hear.”

VERNON⠀★⠀you’re not using protection.

you tremble under vernon, nails digging into his tensed forearms as he grinds against you — skin to skin, your combined arousal squelching with each rut of his cock through your folds. 

his tip bumps your clit so perfectly, and he’s watching each little reaction on your face so intently that you could cry. not just because of how loved you feel, but how bad you need him too.

vernon’s even worse off than you are — but he can’t cross this line. unless.. 

“i know we shouldn’t,” he mumbles, gritting his teeth when his tip catches on your hole with a particularly rough thrust. “but, fuck, i’m really struggling here..”

“me too,” you admit, wrapping your arms around his toned back. “i want it.”

his eyes widen, slowing the rocks of his body, and you nearly choke from the loss of friction. “don’t just say that..”

“i’m not,” you give him a reassuring smile, pecking his nose sweetly. “i want to feel you.”

“fuck.” he groans when he dives in for a kiss, reaching down to line himself up. his head of his cock just nudges your heat, and it twitches. “okay.. but if you say—”

“not gonna wanna stop.”

CHAN⠀★⠀you’re both too drunk.

you giggle as chan’s heavy breath tickles your neck. his lips latch onto the skin to suck a bruise and you shiver, body writhing under his pinning you to the couch. 

“baby, shi—stop squirming, please,” he moans out at your frantic hips rutting against the tent in his pants — the throb of his cock matching the one in his temples. 

your head is swimming, chan’s touch leaving a trail of fire across your sweating body. you can’t even remember leaving the bar, let alone making it home; all your hazy brain knows for sure is that you need chan. 

“want it,” you bumble, not a thought passing in your head as you reach down to grip him. chan keels over, his drunken lust taking over as he humps into your hand.

“we shouldn’t do this,” he huffs to himself, a brief moment of clarity. it wouldn’t be right. 

you’re so sensitive to everything right now, you swear your eyes well up in desperation. or maybe your vision’s just that blurry. determined, you drag your crotch against him, moaning out at the burning friction.

his mouth drops open in a whimper, just letting you. “but, i guess we could..”

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Unfortunately, you had.

You hadn’t meant for it to happen but how could it not? Not only was he incredible in bed, he had the charm and kindness outside of the bedroom that would make anyone fall head over heels for him. Seunghyun always took care of you. He was always there when you needed a shoulder to cry on or someone to just hang out with. He showed up no matter what and that was important to you.

“You there?” A hand waving in your face and a familiar deep voice brought you out of your thoughts.

“Yeah, sorry, what’s up?” You said, pushing Seunghyun’s hand away playfully.

He grinned, capturing your hand in his. “I said, I’m filming a couple of solo scenes then you’re back in. You can watch or go grab a bite to eat, it might take a bit.”

You had been so thrown off by the rare public display of affection that it took you a minute to reply. “I’ll watch just in case you mess up and I can use it against you at some point.”

“I’d expect nothing less,” he laughed, bringing the back of your hand up to press a kiss to it before letting it go. “Have fun.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

He had to be fucking with you. Truly because what the hell were you watching right now? Seunghyun was straddling the chair in the hottest way you had ever seen. Not only that but he was moving on it, like he was riding the damn thing. You felt yourself grow hot, squeezing your thighs together to stop the throbbing between your legs. You were certain you had never been this turned on in your life. And, he was doing it all in a damn suit. It was criminal. You knew you were already wet just from watching him. Your body was really betraying you at the most inappropriate time and it was all Seunghyun’s fault.

Finally. Finally, he wrapped up his scenes. As he approached you, you tried to act cool but if anyone could see through you, it would be Seunghyun.

“You’re looking a little flushed there,” he commented, an eyebrow raised.

“You knew exactly what you were doing,” you narrowed your eyes at him.

“Maybe but pull yourself together because we have a few more things to film,” he had the nerve to smirk at you, grabbing your hand and dragging you onto the set. How were you supposed to get through these scenes knowing he was about to stare so intensely at you while you were already a mess? Oh, you were so going to get him back for this.

It was a miracle you made it through the rest of the filming but somehow you had. Now, in the back of the cab on your way to Seunghyun’s place, it was a fight with yourself to keep your hands off him. You tried to hold back, you really did but with how worked up you were it was near impossible. So, you placed your hand high on his upper thigh, leaning over to press your lips along his neck. He had to bite back the groan threatening to spill from his lips as your hand slid higher, moving to palm him through his pants. His hand reached behind your neck, pulling you up so your lips met his. He wasted no time parting your lips, pushing his tongue into your mouth. It was hungry, messy. Thank everything that just as you were about to say fuck it and straddle him in the back of the cab, it came to a stop outside his building. Reluctantly, the two of you pulled away from each other, Seunghyun hurriedly paying for the ride before dragging you inside.

The second you were inside the apartment, he pushed you against the door, holding your hands above your head, claiming your lips once again. His hips grinded against yours, his erection pressing against you causing you to move your own hips against him. You were like two horny teenagers who couldn't get enough of each other, dry humping against the door.

“I’m going to fuck you so good,” he mumbled against your lips. “Been thinking about it all day.”

“Is that a promise?” You panted, chasing his lips for another kiss.

“A guarantee," he released your hands, pulling off your shirt quickly. A trail of your discarded clothes followed you both to the bedroom where he threw you down on the bed, giving you no time to protest as he pushed your legs apart, situating his head between them.

His tongue ran a long stripe up your folds, the tip of his tongue flicking against your clit causing your hips to buck up off the mattress. Your fingers threaded through his hair as he worked his magic with his tongue, leaving you dripping. When he lifted his head up, he licked his lips. “I bet you’ve been drenched all day, haven’t you? I saw the way you were watching me like you wanted to devour me on the spot.”

“Because I did and you were doing it on purpose!” You moaned as he kissed up your body, wrapping his lips around one of your nipples.

“Maybe,” he mumbled, moving to your other breast, flicking his tongue over your nipple repeatedly leaving you a writhing mess.

“Well, it fucking worked. The way you were riding that chair…” His lips found yours yet again, cutting your sentence off as he practically devoured you. He ground his bare cock against your pussy, causing you to whine. So close, yet so far. But, no, you wanted to do this your way. You managed to push him away from your mouth for a second. “But, I think I need to show you how it’s done properly.”

He raised a brow, a smirk on his face as you pushed his shoulder to make him lay back on the mattress, you straddled him, swinging your legs either side of his hips. Now, you were in control. His hands automatically found their place on your waist, running up and down your body as he watched you. “Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah,” you whispered, pressing kisses along his shoulder, moving up to tug on his earlobe — something you knew he loved. “Let me give you a lesson.”

Slowly, you rubbed yourself against his cock, coating him in your slick. He bit his lower lip, so close to pushing you back down and taking control back but he waited. Very impatiently. Once you’d done torturing him, you lifted your hips up slightly, grasping his cock in your hand, guiding it to your entrance. You sank down onto him, a loud moan falling from your lips as you took him to the hilt. He gave you a moment to adjust, watching you with hooded eyes. Then, you lifted your hips and sank back down. Your hands rested on his chest as you set a steady pace.

“Fuck yeah, just like that, baby,” he groaned, head falling back into the pillows.

You picked up the pace, bouncing harder, moving your hands behind you to rest on his knees, arching your body. The groans he was making was the most beautiful sound then, when you suddenly switched it up and began grinding on him, he nearly lost it. His own hips moving up to push up into you.

“You feel so good,” you moaned, your eyes darting down to where you were joined, another loud moan escaping you.

“Look at you. So beautiful riding my cock,” he rasped, bucking up into you harder. “I’m so fuckin’ close. Gonna fill you up so good, baby. You want that?”

“Yes,” you whined, lifting your hips up to which he thrust up hard into you, hitting the spot inside you that had you seeing stars. You lost your pace, your orgasm right there verging on the edge.

“Touch yourself for me,” he said as he held you in place, fucking into you. “Make yourself cum all over me.”

Your fingers reached between your legs, circling your clit. The dual stimulation of your fingers and the way his cock was driving into you was too much. You cried out his name as you came, your body tensing, eyes squeezed shut. The way you squeezed him, the sound of his name falling from your lips, it was too much for him and he spilled inside you with a loud moan of his own, holding you in place to fill you up just like he said.

You were left breathless as you collapsed against his chest, Seunghyun’s hand coming to rub along your back as he caught his own breath back. The breathless words that followed were the last things you expected to hear. “That song is about you, you know.”

“What?” You weren’t sure you were hearing him right in your post sex haze.

“The song. It’s about you.”

“I… really?”

“Yeah, I’m crazy about you. Figured you knew that, I just didn’t want to pressure you into anything but, yeah, I love you.”

You looked up at him, taking in his blissed out expression and the softness of his eyes. “I love you, too.”

He smiled, cupping the back of your head as he kissed you softly. Then, that devious little smirk appeared on his face. “Although, I might need another lesson.”

You laughed, burying your head in the crook of his neck. “I think I can make that happen.”

Not you, though. No matter how hard he tried to shut you out (and he often did), you wouldn’t allow it. You knew Seunghyun better than anyone. You could tell with just a look from him when he was spiralling. That was why, ever since that livestream, you had stuck by his side more than ever. It had been tough. The days after that had been rough. Watching him cry and hate himself for something that truly wasn’t even a big deal, hurt you so much. The media, still to this day, liked to attack him for it. They liked to remind him of how badly he messed up. But, he had you to remind him he wasn’t his past mistakes. He had a bright future to look forward to, he just had to believe in himself.

“Seunghyun,” you called out as you knocked on his studio door. These days he was mostly busy working on music, it helped him work through all his feelings and emotions. You were glad he had something to get lost in that wasn’t his own mind.

There was no answer so you knocked again. You heard the scraping of a chair against the floor then the door was open. He tilted his head and looked at you, confusion on his face. “What are you doing here? Did we have plans?”

“Yeah, we did and I text you to remind you,” you narrowed your eyes, examining his face. He looked tired, more tired than usual. “How long have you been in here?”

“Uh, just a couple of hours,” he lied. He had a tell, everyone had a tell when they lied and his was the way he always ran a hand through his hair. Knowing him for as long as you had, it was easy to notice.

“Yeah, yeah, sure,” you replied sarcastically. “That’s why you’re still wearing the exact same shirt as you were yesterday when we were facetiming.”

“I always wear the same shirt!”

“You’re such a bad liar! You have a new outfit everyday. You can’t fool me, Seunghyun. Now, tell me, how long have you really been in here?” You stepped into his studio, making sure to close the door behind you.

“Maybe since yesterday afternoon,” he said sheepishly, resigning himself to sit back down on the chair at the computer he had been working on.

You perched on the edge of the desk with a sigh falling from your lips. Seunghyun was a hard worker, he put his all into everything he did but when he did things like this — staying up all night so hyperfocused — you knew something was wrong. You had a long past with Seunghyun going from being each other’s first love to best friends and now? Well, you hadn’t really put a label on it but you were something more once again. Many nights when he wasn’t working were spent lost in each other's company, talking, laughing and soaking in the joy you brought to each other. Seunghyun would always be the man that you loved with your whole heart. It may have taken a while for both of you to realise that you belonged together but you had… kind of gotten there in the end.

Whatever you two had now, it was special. You could wait for him to define it, you wanted to go at his pace. Pushing him into something was the last thing on your mind. Besides, you knew how he felt about you with the words he said, the way he cared for you. Sometimes, a label wasn’t needed.

“You want to talk about what’s bothering you?” You asked softly.

Seunghyun tore his eyes away from the computer to look at you briefly. “Not really.”

“Okay then.” You weren’t dismissing him, just agreeing to lay off. So, the next few hours flew by with Seunghyun working on his music. You had moved to sit on the small couch he had in his studio, reading a book that he’d had on the table. It was hard to focus knowing that something was wrong with Seunghyun but you were patient, he’d talk to you when he was ready. It was also hard to read when he kept playing snippets of the music he was working on. You could’ve sworn you heard him mixing in news snippets with his name in them but you couldn’t be so sure. Whatever he was doing, he was focused.

Then, he finally spoke.

“I’m angry,” he said quietly, still looking at the computer screen. “And, I’m upset.”

“With what?” You asked, putting the book down beside you to give him your full attention.

Instead of answering you, he played the track he’d been working on; just a snippet but it was enough. The second you heard the few lyrics pieced together with the new snippets and the clip of the livestream, you felt your heart drop. To know all the pain and the heartache he had suffered through, it made you want to hunt down every single person that had ever said anything bad about him. Choi Seunghyun was the kindest, biggest hearted person you had ever met and he had been knocked down by people who barely knew him. People who defined him by the one mistake he had made.

“Seunghyun…” you started, not fully sure what to say.

“It’s not fucking fair. The shit they put me through, the way they dragged my name through the mud all because of one thing I did? They ruined me. What did I do to deserve that? Am I really not good enough that the whole of the country I love decided to make me a villain?” His voice wavered, the anger and sadness seeping through.

“It’s not fair. It has never been fair. The things they’ve done and said about you are vile. There are people out there who have done far worse and they get away with it. You, Seunghyun, have every right to be angry at the world, at the people who prayed on your downfall,” you stood up, moving to stand in front of him as you turned his chair to face you. You knelt down in front of him, placing your hands on his knees in a show of comfort. “But, it’s not because you’re not good enough. It’s because they’re assholes who chose a kind, loving person as a target thinking he’s weak but you’re not.”

“Yeah, I am,” he scoffed. “Everyone thinks so.”

“I don’t think so.”

“You’re biased,” he smiled sadly, looking down. “I don’t think I’m ever going to be good enough. I’ve never felt so… insecure. I’ve always been insecure but to feel the way I do now? It feels like I’ve been knocked down and stomped all over. I’ve basically been blacklisted for one small mistake I made.”

“I may be biased but you are one of the bravest and strongest people I’ve ever known,” you brought one of your hands up to cradle his cheek. “You know how I know that? Because you’re here making a fucking song about it, using their own words against them to show them that no matter what they’ve said, they haven’t broken you. There are people out there that love you, Seunghyun. People waiting for you to come back. Don’t let those saying negative things about you distract you from the fact you have such a loving fanbase who are going to wait as long as it takes for you to feel better.”

There was a beat of silence as he leaned into your touch, his eyes closing for just a moment. Seunghyun had always questioned what he’d done in the world to deserve someone like you by his side. You were like a guardian angel, always there for him when he needed someone, no matter how hard he had tried to push you away. His heart belonged to you — now, then and forever.

“I love you,” he said quietly. “So fucking much.”

“And, I love you,” you leaned up, your lips finding his in a soft, gentle kiss. “I’ll always be by your side, baby. Don’t give up on yourself. You can do this. Let all that anger and frustration out in your music. Show them you’re taking no prisoners, that no matter how hard they try, they can’t break you anymore.”

He chased your lips, pulling you onto his lap for a longer, deeper kiss. When you parted, he cupped your cheek, a smile on his face. “Only if you stay by my side.”

“Forever and always, baby.”

“Seunghyun, you’re freakishly tall, can you fix the balloons on the arch by the door? They’re not sitting how I want them to,” you huffed, hands on your hips as you looked at the giant balloon arch you’d ordered. He thought it was unnecessary but who was he to argue?

“You’re just short,” he playfully rolled his eyes, reaching up to tidy the arch up. “I told you we didn’t need this.”

“And, I told you that I love you but to keep that mouth of yours shut. We are celebrating you today and so, yes, I will be going all out, thank you very much.”

“Aye, aye, captain.”

He gave you a fake salute but not before dipping down to press a chaste kiss on your lips, laughing at the pout on your face. As nervous as he might be, having you by his side made it so much easier. The excitement you had for him was contagious, he couldn’t help but feel giddy. And, he should. It was such a feat to go through what he had, lay it all on the table and give it to the world. He had come out on the other side a strong person. Not everyone could do that.

“We have enough wine, right?” You called out to him as you smoothed out a table cloth on one of the tables you’d set up for food.

“I own my own wine brand, baby. We’ll always have enough wine,” he replied with a snicker.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The second 6pm had chimed, you had put Another Dimension on a loop. No other music was to be played for the rest of the night, those were your orders. Seunghyun, surrounded by the people he loved most in the world, had been congratulated and dragged into many conversations about each and every song. He loved nothing more than to talk about the music he had made but it had dragged him away from you. His eyes always caught yours from across the room, laughing and joking with Daesung or dancing with Chaerin to For Fans — your favourite song off the album. He had given you a special listening to it a week earlier so you knew every track word for word already. It filled his heart with so much joy to see you being the only person in the room singing along.

When you caught him staring at you, you raised a brow, nodding your head towards the other side of the room. Quickly, he got the hint, excusing himself from his conversation and making his way towards you.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the man of the hour, T.O.P himself,” you teased.

“I know, don’t go falling to your knees or anything,” he joked but then he saw that glint in your eye. The one he knew that only meant trouble. He felt himself harden slightly in his pants, just that one look could get him going because he knew exactly what it meant.

“But, what if I want to get on my knees for you?” You whispered, taking his tie between your fingers to tug him a little closer to you.

“Then I’d have no complaints,” he breathed, leaning closer, his lips now inches from yours.

“Hmm, I bet.” You closed the distance, capturing his lips in a deep, passionate kiss. Your hand remained on his tie, keeping him tugged towards you, your other hand reaching up behind his neck, playing with the hairs on the back of his neck.

Seunghyun groaned into the kiss, hands immediately finding their place on your hips. It was a dance you’d done so many times before but he’d never tire of it as he brought one hand up to tilt your head, deepening the kiss. When you both pulled back breathless, he rested his forehead against yours but he had no time to regain his sense of composure because you had tugged on his tie, turning around as you pulled him towards your bedroom. He eagerly followed, not that he had a choice.

The second you were inside, you kicked the door closed behind him as you pushed him into the door, pulling his lips back to yours hungrily. He nipped at your bottom lip to which you happily opened your mouth to allow his tongue to slip inside. As your hand slid down his body across his chest and his abdomen, he let out a low groan. You smiled against his lips, your hand finding their place finally as you cupped him through his pants. He was already hard, achingly so. You rubbed him through his pants, his hips bucking into your hand for more friction.

“Don’t tease,” he mumbled against your lips.

“Me? I would never.”

Oh, but you would. You popped open the button of his pants sliding your hand in them and behind the waistband of his boxers. Your palm rubbed along his aching length, not quite grasping him just yet. As your thumb ran across the head of his cock, he jerked. You had him exactly where you wanted him. Finally, you wrapped your hand around him, slowly pumping up and down his length. The sigh of relief he let out was music to your ears but you were slow. Too slow. His lips found purchase on your neck, nipping and biting to leave the marks he loved to leave. By the time you left this room, everyone would know who you belonged to. It gave him a sense of pride marking you up like that. As his tongue ran along one of the marks he’d just made to soothe it, his lips moved up to your ear, whispering.

“You can do better than that, princess. Thought you wanted to put those pretty lips to use and get on your knees for me?”

Your eyes met his and that intense look from him made your knees buckle. Well, it was his day after all. How could you make him wait any longer? Without any hesitation, you dropped to your knees, tugging down his pants and boxers down his legs. You wasted no more time, taking his cock in your hand, licking up a long stripe on the underside before you wrapped your lips around the tip. Your tongue swirled around, flicking along the slit, tasting the precum that was already leaking. You moaned at the taste, Seunghyun’s hand coming to tangle in your hair, trying to push you further down his length before he lost his damn mind.

Inch by inch you took him into your mouth, pulling your head back, setting a steady rhythm. Seunghyun felt like he was in heaven, his eyes never leaving you as he watched you taking him in his mouth. He couldn’t help but rock his hips slightly. So, you decided to go further, taking him fully in your mouth until his tip hit the back of your throat causing you to choke. He let out a long, filthy groan, holding you in place for a few seconds. You pulled off, catching your breath back before doing it again and again.

“Holy fuck,” he moaned, his head falling back against the door he was leaning against. “Just like that, baby. Take it all.”

Taking him back in your mouth, you let him set the pace now much to his delight. He held your head in place as he fucked your mouth with fervor He could feel his release drawing closer and closer, the choking and spluttering coming from you each time he hit the back of your throat was enough to make him feral.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum, baby. You ready for me to fill this pretty mouth up? Gonna swallow it all for me like a good girl?” He rasped, never slowing his hips. You managed a nod, breathing through your nose.

It only took a few more thrusts of his hips before he was holding your head in place, spilling into your mouth with a moan of your name. You swallowed every last drop like he’d asked, gasping for breath when he finally pulled from your mouth. His breath was heavy, eyes closed as he pulled himself together. You got to your feet, licking your lips. Seunghyun, opening his eyes, met yours, his thumb reaching out to remove any remains from the corners of your mouth.

“So good to me,” he mumbled.

“You deserve it. That’s just the beginning, too. I have a lot more planned for tonight,” you winked, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. “Let’s freshen up and head back out there.”

It took a few minutes for you both to get yourself looking decent again before heading back out into the party. Seunghyun’s hand was on your lower back, guiding you as you walked.

“I’ve been looking everywhere for you two! Where did you disa-” Jiyong started but suddenly cut himself off when he spotted the marks on your neck, throwing his hands up in the air dramatically. “Should’ve fucking known.”

He laughed, rolling his eyes before walking away causing you and Seunghyun both to laugh. For now, the party could continue but once everyone left, that’s when the real celebration would begin.

He still didn’t understand how everything had gone so wrong but he should’ve expected it. He was stupid to think he could finally give his heart to someone so fully without having it torn to shreds. Seunghyun had never been one to fall in love so easily but with you had come so naturally. Everything about you had mesmerised him from the second he had met you. Your beautiful smile that lit up the whole room, the way you so easily fit in with his friends, how you only ever had eyes for him. Falling in love with you had been the best thing he’d ever done in his life up until it wasn’t. Nothing ever went right for him so why did he think a relationship would?

You had been together for four whole years. Seunghyun couldn’t say it was a waste — the memories he had of you were what got him through the day no matter how painful they were but it felt like it had been pointless. How did you go from being in love and planning a future together to suddenly walking out on him? He couldn’t wrap his head around it. The only logical answer to him was that he wasn’t good enough. He had never been good enough. For anything or anyone. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t be the man you needed. He was broken, unfixable. At least that’s what he told himself.

With a heavy sigh and an even heavier heart, he finished off the bottle of wine he had been holding in his hand. Usually, he was more sophisticated and would drink out of a glass but he didn’t care anymore. So what if he had just finished his second bottle of wine? So what if he was laid on his couch in his pyjamas. It wasn’t like anyone was going to see him anyway. Shaking the bottle, he realised he had nothing left. With a grumble, he got to his feet, swaying slightly but he managed to pad his way over to the kitchen. Just as he opened the fridge to pull another one out, there was a knock on the door. He rolled his eyes, grabbing the bottle, ignoring the door. Except, the knocking persisted which could only mean one person.

Kwon Jiyong. Seunghyun’s best friend, the one person he knew would probably camp outside his door until he answered so reluctantly, he decided it was better to get it over with. Seunghyun pulled open his front door and, lo and behold, there stood Jiyong with the angriest look on his face.

“You look like fucking shit.” Those were the first words to come from his best friend's mouth.

“Nice to see you, too,” Seunghyun grumbled. “Come in, I suppose.”

“Damn right I’m coming in,” Jiyong huffed, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. Before Seunghyun could even open his newest bottle of wine, it was swiped from his hands by Jiyong. “This is how you’re spending your days? Ignoring us and wasting your days away with your stupid wine?”

Seunghyun gaped at him, more offended he’d insulted his wine than himself. “First of all, it’s not stupid. And, second of all, yes. What else is there to do?”

“Um, I don’t know, maybe hang out with your friends? Take a shower? Stop being a recluse? All great suggestions if I say so myself.”

“No, no and no.”

“Yes, yes and yes. So, sober up,” Jiyong grinned, patting Seunghyun on the face. “Because you’re going to take a shower, put on some nice clothes and come to the bar with me, Youngbae and Daesung.”

“Nah, I’ll pass,” Seunghyun grunted, trying to swipe for the bottle of wine but Jiyong was quick, stepping away so he couldn’t.

“If you don’t, I’m calling your mom,” Jiyong said.

“You wouldn’t.”

To make a show of it, Jiyong pulled his phone from his jacket with his free hand, scrolling through his contacts until his thumb hovered over Seunghyun’s mom’s number. “You know I will.”

Seunghyun counted to three in his head, taking a deep breath before he relented. No matter how annoying Jiyong was at that moment, he knew if his mom was here, it would be so much worse. He would get the grilling of a lifetime. That was something he wanted to avoid. So, with a reluctant grumble, he agreed. “Fine. Give me half an hour.”

“I’ll be here,” Jiyong smiled like the cat that got the cream, throwing himself down on Seunghyun’s couch.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

So, maybe it wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be. Seeing his friends again had lifted his mood slightly despite the disapproving, stern talks he had got from each of them. They drank, told jokes and not once did any of them bring you up. No, they knew better than that. At one point, Seunghyun excused himself for a smoke break, heading outside onto the small balcony area of the bar. It was quiet there, somewhere he could escape the noise and chaos of the bar. Pulling his lighter from his jacket, he lit up a cigarette, taking a long drag of it. His arms rested on the railing, leaning over it. With his phone in one hand, he did what he told himself he needed to stop doing and brought up old photos of you and him together. That always hurt the most but he loved seeing your face. So many pictures of the two of you together, looking happy. Then, he landed on the last photo of the two of you together like he always did. It was the day before you broke up. He had his arms around you from behind, kissing your cheek while you smiled brightly into the camera. He figured if he stared at it long enough he could figure out what had gone wrong, like that one photo had all the answers. But, all it did was bring back the memories of the worst day of his life.

“Seunghyun, we need to talk,” you said, a somber tone to your voice that he didn’t pick up on. He had been working in his studio, adding some beats to his newest tracks.

“Just give me a couple of minutes, baby,” he replied.

“No, Seunghyun. We need to talk now.”

At your tone, he turned around then was instantly on his feet the second he saw the tear marks down your cheeks. He was in front of you in mere seconds, his hands cradling your face. “What’s happened?”

“I-I can’t do this anymore,” you cried, taking his hands and pulling them from your face.

“Do what?”

“This. Us. I just… can’t.”

His heart fell into his stomach. What? Those were the last words he expected to hear out of your mouth. Anything but that. He opened his mouth to talk but words failed him. His heart was beating so rapidly against his chest, he felt like he needed to hold onto something to stop himself from falling over.

“I-I’m so sorry but… I just… I need to leave. I.. feel so.. stuck and I love you, I do but this… isn’t what I want right now. I can’t settle for a life that my heart isn’t in anymore,” you furiously wiped at your eyes, the mascara you were wearing rubbing onto your hands.

“But… but we planned a whole future together. We… were gonna get married…” He couldn’t even finish his sentence, his breathing feeling like it was coming in short gasps.

“That’s the problem. I’m not ready for that. I… I’m so sorry, Seunghyun but it’s over.”

And, before he could get another word in, before he could protest and even fight for you, you had walked out of the door. He stood there, dumbfounded, his heart shattering. He felt like his whole world had just collapsed into a thousand pieces, tears now falling from his own eyes.

“Seunghyun?”

He choked on the inhale of the cigarette he had just taken. There was no way in hell he had just heard your voice let alone hear it saying his name. No, it had to be a figment of his imagination. He was just stuck in a memory. Once he’d gotten over his coughing fit, he decided it was best to turn around just to make sure. There was no way you could be there. Absolutely no way the first time he stepped out of his house in six months you’d be in exactly the same place as he was.

He was wrong.

There you stood looking as beautiful as ever. He was rooted to the spot, the cigarette between his fingers falling to the ground.

“I thought it was you,” you said quietly, taking a cautious step forward. “I… hi.”

“…what are you doing here?” He didn’t mean to sound as harsh as he did.

“I was out with some friends, I saw Jiyong and he said you were out here and I just… wanted to see how you were doing,” you hugged your arms around yourself. Protecting yourself from the cold or the conversation with the man whose heart you had broken, you weren’t sure.

Seunghyun let out a bitter laugh. “Oh, just peachy. I’m doing amazing. So, so good.”

“Haven’t lost your sarcasm, I see.”

“No, that’s one thing you didn’t break.”

The silence fell between you. Heavy and hard. His eyes met yours, seeing the glossy sheen. God, he hated when you were upset even now after you’d hurt him, he never wanted to see you hurt. He let out a long sigh, shaking his head. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t prepared for this.”

“Me neither,” you admitted. A silence, then you spoke again. “Seunghyun, I’m sorry.”

“Can you just… tell me why?”

“I did.”

“If you felt that way, why didn’t you tell me sooner? We could’ve fixed it together. You didn’t have to walk out like that. You didn’t have to walk away from us.”

“I did. It was the only way.”

“Bullshit,” he huffed. “Did you even love me?”

“Of course I did! I loved you more than anything in the world.”

“So, that’s why you moved on so quickly?”

That stung. Not only you but him. When he had found out that you’d started seeing someone else just four months after your breakup, he had wanted to find the guy and punch him in the face. But, Seunghyun wasn’t a violent person. He’d never hurt anyone or anything.

“That didn’t work out,” you said in a small voice.

“Wow, shocker,” he replied sarcastically.

“I know you hate me.”

“I don’t hate you. For fuck's sake, I still love you. These last six months have been hell for me. You were the best thing to happen to me and I lost you. I lost the one good thing I had. Then, I had to go and see you posting photos with your new boyfriend all over Instagram. That hurt but you know what the fucked up part is? Deep down, I was glad you were happy. All I ever want is for you to be happy. I wish that was with me,” he rubbed his eyes, refusing to cry. He had done enough of that these days.

Carefully, you took a step forward until you were right in front of him. You took one of his hands in yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. You hated yourself for breaking his heart, for making him a shell of who he used to be. But, you couldn’t change the past. All you could do was try to fix your mistakes, make things better.

“I truly am sorry, Seunghyun. Believe me when I say I never wanted to hurt you. I care about you, I love you. I needed to find myself. You understand that, right? I know I could've done it in a better way. I hate how much I’ve hurt you and nothing I can say or do will ever fix that but maybe one day we can be friends?” You asked with hope in your voice. It was a long shot. If the roles were reversed, you wouldn’t want anything to do with him.

But, Seunghyun, being the kind-hearted, incredible human being he was, nodded his head briefly. If he couldn’t have you in his life the way he wanted, something was better than nothing. “Maybe one day.”

You smiled sadly, leaning up on your tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll hold you to that. Be kind to yourself, Seunghyun. You deserve happiness, too.”

And, with that, once again you walked away from him.

He brought his hand up to his cheek, feeling the lingering of your lips. Now, he had even more things to think about but he couldn’t help, for the first time in a long time, a very small smile appeared on his face. His heart wasn't fixed, his hurt wasn’t suddenly gone but maybe with time, it would get better.

AT LONG LAST, THE CURTAINS HAVE DRAWN. what has been the better part of hours stretched across an entire day has felt like nothing but mere seconds to sunghoon. at long last, he can peel his eyes away from the glimpses of sweet heaven before him without risk of missing anything.

for the first time in hours, sunghoon can blink.

initially, it offers no effect; eyes long past dried out like they’ve been baking under a lamp. sunghoon screws them shut, watches colours explode behind his lids until he can feel tears dotting his lashes from the pressure. 

matter of fact, he hasn’t closed his eyes for so long that he could probably fall asleep within seconds, even in the position he’s in: slumped in an uncomfortable wooden chair, sat facing the window of his hotel room as neon lights flicker by. 

for a moment, he considers it. his head throbs with a migraine from how long he’s been forcing his eyes to stay wide open, and there’s no point sitting here now that things have just gotten boring. you’ve just shut him out, like a prude. a tease. suddenly caring after an entire day of paying no mind to your ajar curtains – starting at the ass crack of dawn when you pulled them back to welcome in the sunlight. 

sunghoon accepted that invitation, too.

it’s not like his attention could be anywhere other than the view of your hotel across from his – not until his body physically shuts down from exhaustion in short, pathetic bouts – but he pulled a chair from the sad excuse of a dining table and sat his ass down right in front of his window; where he’s been unmoving, unblinking, as you went about your day since. acting oblivious to the audience you’ve practically begged to flock over to you, just flaunting yourself out there for any old chump to drool over if they were so lucky to look up from the street or out of their window. 

he considered getting toothpicks to keep his eyelids pried open in those instances where his body began to nod off, until he jolted wide awake and freshly energised at the sight of you padding by the window in nothing but a towel. skin glistening, hair damp and running stray beads of water down your shoulders. 

sunghoon ran his tongue over his teeth – oh, how he wished he could lick up every last droplet from your body, suck your hair into his mouth and taste the strawberry shampoo you so famously use. 

your teasing didn’t stop there. you made it a point to keep walking by that window, just throwing yourself at sunghoon as you showed off your new matching lace underwear, then returned in a skimpy pajama set. 

who walks by one window that many fucking times as they’re getting dressed? you have to be doing it on purpose. god, you’re such a damn….flirt. 

he’s not complaining though. of course not! the fleeting sight of you each time, just innocently trotting along by the window, was enough to pull a good few orgasms out of him; even with his aching joints in this stiff fucking chair.

he’s scarcely left his room at all, which is only due to the fact that he’s mirroring you. you’ve been isolating for days on end ever since wrapping up the tour stop in this city. there was a deliberate few days separating this concert from the next one to give you some time to sightsee, make the most of a break here and take a breather from your schedules – yet you’ve done nothing but remain holed up in that hotel room ever since performing for thousands on stage.

it’s like you know it’s ‘cause he’s watching, isn’t it?

sunghoon paid good fucking money for this view. jake thought he was being smart, snagging a room only a few doors down on your floor. thought he could hear you through the walls, maybe coincidentally bump into you each time you leave. except, you haven’t left once – only room service or your staff visiting to deliver food, offer company. jake isn’t getting shit for what he dropped a whole paycheck on, and yet you’re over here prancing around half-naked for sunghoon’s eyes to feast on. 

sunghoon heaves a sigh, stretching his arms out above his head until the joints pop. aches throb in his forearms, the muscles exhausted from when he was jerking off and having back to back orgasms just staring at the view of your empty hotel room. 

it’s been good fun with you, but the time’s come for you to actually leave. tomorrow morning is your flight to the next city. you’ll be forced to go outside – much like sunghoon, as he’s forced to follow you.

he’s been neglecting his own body in favour of catching any sight of yours through the window. the last time he took care of his health was with the sole purpose of attending your concert here. 

he’ll need to present himself as a real person again. take an actual shower and wash his hair. shave the stubble off his face, maybe even tweeze his eyebrows. he wants to look good for you when you see him. because you will – as you have before. 

waving at him in the stands, blowing him a kiss at barricade, smiling at him like an old friend at the send off. each memory more cherished than the last – each instance the red string of fate grows tauter between you. 

of course, the crowd is all thinking the same thing. he’s aware of that, he’s not stupid. 

but they’re not him. they don’t know you like he does. 

can any of your other fans name the brand of perfume you spritzed on after your shower this morning? (gucci flora, naughty girl… you have a brand deal with dior!) can they count the amount of underwear sets you folded into your suitcase? (5, all pastels. you must wash them at each stop.) can any of those pathetic, delusional bottom feeders say with confidence that you opened your curtains to let them in?

yeah. 

he didn’t think so. 

—

sunghoon hates the airport. almost as much as he hates camping outside of the concert venues. everyone here is in a rush and shoving and breathing down each other’s necks. he’s been here since the early morning to secure a nice, clear view when you arrive, but he’s gradually been shoved to third from the front in the crowd that’s gathered. god, some people have no manners these days. whatever happened to fandom etiquette? they’re all here for the same person – you – but it’s like every man for himself. 

“ay, wait,” jake nudges him from the side, tilting his phone to sunghoon. “she’s just about to arrive.”

sunghoon narrows his eyes at the screen, scanning over the text messages before jake shuts it off with a mutter to mind his damn business. but sunghoon already recognised the contact name. it was your make-up artist – he’s bought bits of information off of her in the past. never got his money’s worth though, she’s really vague with promises to reveal more if you spend more. sunghoon doesn’t waste his time with that scam shit. jake being privy to live updates of your location though?

“how do you get so much out of her? she’d never tell me anything good.” sunghoon asks, tone bored as if he’s not seething with jealousy right now. 

jake pokes his tongue out, flashes suggestive eyes while giggling to himself. sunghoon nearly gags. sleeping with your staff while he claims to want you? no fucking shame… 

there’s a roar of commotion at the front, and sunghoon stands on his tip-toes for a clear view as he cranes his neck towards the entrance. someone pushes him from behind, cussing him out for being too fucking tall, but sunghoon can’t hear anything other than ringing in his ears as he recognises all your staff and security filing out through the doors. and then, there you are: just as pretty as when he last saw you through the hotel window.

sunghoon’s momentarily lifted off his feet as the crowd rippled, following after your crew while you wave and bow to all the fans gathered here in your name. sunghoon keeps losing his balance, losing sight of you as he’s pushed from all angles. people get barbaric in your presence. 

some (stupid) few from the front divert, rushing up to your staff and earning a hard shove to the ground by your security. they’re not all that competent though – a taller fan, one sunghoon recalls as riki that he camped with at your osaka concert, is able to shoulder his way through your stylists and grab your arm. he’s wrangled away by security within the next second, but the damage was done – they can actually get to you. so, they try. 

the airport erupts into a frenzy. the mob of fans sprint at your crew, hands gripping and legs stretching to get in between your security, while they struggle to keep the overwhelming number of them at bay. jake pats sunghoon’s arm before he himself sets off, waiting behind the more forward fans and watching for an opening in your guard. 

a thought forms in sunghoon’s head. he takes out the black mask tucked into his pocket and slings it around his ears, then pulls his cap down low, covering his face. he, too, watches for an opening – but he doesn’t make himself a known threat. he stands back, smiles under his mask when a fight breaks out between the fans. idiots. the horde could easily overpower the common enemy of security, if only they weren’t throwing punches at the competition beside themselves. 

sunghoon pivots the instant his chance appears. a split second decision, he’s flying on his feet to his mark – your staff parted and separated just perfectly enough that he flies under the radar when he steps between them, instantly playing the part as he shoves at the other fans he was just standing beside. he recognises someone he traded insider info with for an exclusive signed photocard of you, someone else who gave sunghoon water when he had heatstroke camping outside of your manila venue. 

and then there’s jake. jake’s eyes widen, shouting something that sunghoon can’t quite catch – not when he launched jake at the wall without a second thought after he appeared in front of him. when a security guard glances at sunghoon, hands too full to think to get a good look at him, he just turns his attention to another frenzied fan. sunghoon’s mouth twitches into a grin under the mask. he’s successfully disguised himself in the role as just another terrified staff member. 

holy shit. he’s thought about doing this before, but never once considered it’d even work. he’s on top of the fucking world right now. this was meant to be!

sunghoon acts like he’s giving an appreciative bow to the guard for protecting him, then backs himself further into the crew, body jostling as they all struggle to shuffle forward – fans still pressing relentlessly in from the outside and blocking the way through. 

he wedges his way through your frantic staff until he catches sight of your hair from behind, the heavens from above parting the clouds and casting a halo of light down on you. sunghoon holds his phone up to his ear before he taps your back, and you flinch at the sudden touch, panicked pretty eyes glancing over your shoulder. 

he covers the phone’s speaker – acting as if he’s on a call – before he strains to shout over the commotion: “miss, i’ll lead you out of here! i’ve just called the airport security, they’re coming to help,”

“but where?” you shout back, perfect brows pinched and perfect lips pouted in worry. he notices the way your eyes flit all over what little of his face isn’t concealed, straining to recognise him, remember a name or a position or anything. he’s this close, this familiar with you – how do you know him again? you’re so cute, futilely trying to figure him out. 

“there’s a private lounge down that hall,” sunghoon points, and your glossy eyes follow. “they told us to wait there until this crowd is dispersed. it’s too out of control to stay here.”

you nod, quick to believe but not as quick to trust. you know that you know him, but you still don’t know where you recognise him, and it’s prickling at you. 

sunghoon says some muffled bullshit through his mask into the phone speaker, then pretends to hang up the phone call. he gives you a quick nod of assurance, offering his hand.

you take it and his skin is on fire. 

sunghoon looks around him frantically, acting like he’s trying to speak with any of the guards but they’re too busy to notice him. he sighs theatrically, yelling at the ear of one that he’s taking you to another room. uncaring if the useless fuck even heard, sunghoon’s already pivoting with you in tow – beelining to the private guest’s lounge (looking up the airport’s map last night came in handy), fingers taut around your wrist like a noose. 

you both rush up to the desk receptionist, who instantly recognises you and starts bumbling through her practiced greeting. you’re too frazzled to reply, so sunghoon does the talking – playing further into his little disguise. 

he’s not really acting when he’s too out of breath to say his words properly, just huffing excuses and puffing lies, hoping it forms a believable sentence that a real staff member would say. the noise from the ongoing chaos outside feeds through the automatic glass door, and so the receptionist doesn’t even let sunghoon finish his bullshit before she’s nodding and leading them into the extra private vip room of the already private lounge. 

you step in first, sunghoon on your heel. the receptionist starts saying some jargon about if you needed any more help but sunghoon’s already shutting the door in her face. the lock clicks, and your head whips to level him with a confused glance. 

sunghoon grabs a nearby chair and pulls it up to the knob, barring the door. you watch with bated breath as he rotates back to face you – tugging off his mask and cap, grinning maniacally. 

he’s thought about this more times than he can count. he’s dreamed of this exact scenario, ending in a slightly different yet drastic way each time. 

he braces for you to scream for help, to cry for mercy, to curse at him or run away from him. you might put up a fight, or you might just surrender. they’re his favourite fantasies, the one that enters his mind most often when he’s fisting his cock with your face pulled up on his phone. 

but you don’t do anything of the sort. you don’t do anything he was prepared for, anything that he’s imagined countless of times before. 

“sunghoon, right?” you say, recognition bright in your eyes as you point at him as if unexpectedly running into a friend. 

he freezes like an idiot. 

“how have you been?” you purr, sitting on the room’s couch. you make yourself comfortable when you lean back, cross your legs. the picture of a worry-free woman. how are you not freaking the fuck out right now?

how do you know his name?!

“you remember me..?” is all he can croak, shifting stupidly in his spot with a thousand yard stare. 

“of course i remember a familiar face,” you simply smile. “i still have the little crocheted penguin you gifted me at the houston send-off. i keep it on my shelf. it’s adorable.”

that catapults sunghoon’s heart over the fucking moon. do you understand how fucking long that tiny thing took him to learn how to make, and then actually make it? the fact that you still have it is something else entirely, but knowing the exact send-off too? because sunghoon doesn’t miss a single one. 

he doesn’t always get barricade, nor does he always get an interaction in with you, but he’s always there at your concerts. he’d rather die than skip showing up for his girl. every stop around the globe, he’s followed you. even when you’re not performing – attending events as a brand ambassador, going on vacations that aren’t on your public schedule. he’s easily dropped multiple zeros in dollars on paying off your sleazy staff members to forfeit insider information or set aside the vip tickets. 

it’s how he knows you’re a single girl, too. have been for quite a while. 

“so how have you been?” you ask him, smiling too fondly for someone who’s essentially his hostage. maybe all the time he spent meticulously doing skincare and waxing his face paid off – the stockholm syndrome affecting you in real time because he’s that hot. 

“oh– well, i don’t do much.” he replies without thinking. stupid, fucking stupid piece of shit. you probably think he’s such a boring loser. scrambling for something to impress you, he adds: “i’ve been spending a lot of money on a certain special someone.” 

sunghoon grins, intentionally popping the dimples from his cheeks so he looks like less of a threat. 

“is that so?” you ask, arching your back as you sit upright. his eyes track the movement, entranced. you’re flirting. “she must be a very lucky girl.”

sunghoon waves it off, like it’s nothing. because it is. you’ve consumed his life – there is no him without you. your music is what pulled him from the murky pits of water in his own head. instead of letting the waves drag him under, you made him want to tread above the surface and stay breathing. just so he could watch your career grow, your dreams come true. you saved his life and so he owes it to you. this is how he leads a fulfilling existence; following after you is how he breathes. 

“just want to make her happy. see her smile. be the reason she keeps making music, keeps living her dream.” sunghoon murmurs, taking space with each word, stepping until he’s towering before you. “are you? is it everything that you dreamed of?”

there’s a flicker across your face of something that he catches, but can’t quite place. before he can even interpret it, you’re smiling again like the sparkle in your eyes never left, shrugging one shoulder. 

“not in certain moments. but when i’m performing, that’s where i’m really living.” 

sunghoon’s hands twitch at his sides, wishing so desperately to reach out for you, to hold you for comfort or to shake you around until you cry, to throw you down and demand what he wants. he doesn’t know. he just needs to prove that he can affect you a sliver of the amount that you affect him. you’re not even scared right now. do you even care that he’s here? would you even react if security barged down the door and shot him in the head? 

there’s an endless list worth of questions he’s wanted to ask you before he dies – industry gossip, your deepest secrets that not even staff know, future releases, specific questions about you that are just to satiate his own greed to know every corner of your being – but he can’t bring himself to acknowledge any of it. he just blurts–

“do you think i won’t hurt you?”

sunghoon’s quite used to the feeling of keeping his eyes open as wide as possible, and he does so that he can take in every little flinch of your face. any reaction that passes across your features, no matter how miniscule. anything for him to interpret – to know if this is all an elaborate act, that you’re actually shaken to your core in fear of the man before you. but– 

nothing. nothing. nothing. 

he holds his eyes open so he doesn’t miss anything, but you do the same right back at him. you don’t blink either, so your faces just stare back at one another, expressionless and carved from stone. he locked you in here with him, he should be the one demanding all the cooperation – and yet all the power is in your hands. he doesn’t understand. 

“will you?” you ask, unphased.

he could, he thinks. he’d leave a mark at least – proof he was here, he got this close. he’d be hailed as some sort of messiah among your most devoted fans. 

but he doesn’t want to. he shakes his head almost imperceptibly, heat flaring behind his nose the only warning before guilty tears nearly dot his lashes. he shuts his eyes hard enough, quick enough that they don’t water. 

you shift in your seat, seeming intrigued. 

“no?” you ask him, and he nods in tiny again. you smile. “no. i didn’t think you were that type of person.” 

sunghoon’s breath rattles out from his throat. you shift forward, your hands reaching up to hover by his legs. you stare at him through your lashes, and his cock stands to attention just at the sight of you so close. regardless of if you’re even asking – he nods. 

your palms gently plant on either side of his thighs, and so much electricity courses through sunghoon’s blood that he’s almost worried he’ll zap and kill you. 

“i don’t know if i’ve ever told you before, but.. you’re really handsome, sunghoon.” 

his adam’s apple bobs almost painfully in a harsh gulp. it does nothing to relieve his cotton mouth. 

“you’re gorgeous.” he chokes out. “so much. perfect.” he’s just murmuring nonsense, brain turning to complete mush at the feel of your hands sliding over his pants. 

you sigh softly. “i feel so grateful, to be loved by you.” 

your hands glide to his front, his cock twitching as the heat of your fingertips graze closer. your thumbs brush at his hipbone, lingering at the band of his pants. 

“let me?” you whisper. so quietly, he thinks he must’ve hallucinated it. 

but he blinks, once and again, and he knows that the way you’re looking at him is real – because his brain could’ve never conjured it. 

you’re so fucking pretty. licking your lips, looking at him through eager eyes. fuck, you’re asking him to let you? even if you didn’t have his word, you could do whatever the fuck you want to him and he’d just take it like the grateful man he is. 

realising he’s making you wait, sunghoon chokes on his answer – his own hands fumbling to unbutton the pants for you. shaky fingers drag his zipper down, ripping the flyer open enough to reveal a glimpse of the prominent bulge in his boxers underneath. 

you follow his lead, flashing a smile that melts his entire being as your fingers find his waistband. you tug gently, and he winces as his length pulls with the movement. he only hopes that you don’t mention the massive stain of pre already there. the front of his pants have been growing tighter with each minute since he locked you in this room. 

slowly, you pull the fabric down until his cock bobs free, flushed red and leaking like a faucet. you blink at its size, wetting your lips again as your fingers reach out to wrap around the base. sunghoon just manages to stifle the sob of relief that nearly left his chest. 

he can’t help how his greedy pelvis bucks forward slightly, and is just as quick to cuss himself out for being so selfish. you make a small hum before leaning in, tapping your lips to the tip. so fucking soft..

you stretch your mouth around him, swallowing his whole length down until you meet your own fingers. sunghoon’s shaking above you, not even registering the embarrassing noises leaving his mouth from the pure ecstasy. you’re so hot and wet around him, tongue so perfectly tracing the vein on the underside of his length. 

you reverse the movement, pulling back and sucking as you go. sunghoon can’t even form a coherent thought, hands trembling at his sides when he should really reach out and pinch to check if you’re real. though the way your mouth seals tight around him feels real enough, the way your tongue swirls his head and laves at the slit. 

overwhelming pleasure seizes his body as you begin to bob your head, stars exploding from the inside out – and sunghoon blacks out. 

by the time he comes back to, he doesn’t immediately realise what happened. it’s not until he winces at the near painful sensitivity in his cock – glancing down as your glossy lips pop off his length, the sharp sensation sending goosebumps racing across his flesh. 

you grin intentionally at him, opening your mouth to show the mess coating your tongue. it’s only then that sunghoon realises he even came. 

prematurely. like a fucking virgin. 

you making a show of swallowing it, throat bobbing as the taste of him slides down. his cock twitches at the sight. 

sunghoon gathers his bearings, runs a hand through the sweaty hair stuck to his forehead. there’s a laundry list of things he would (and could) kill to do to you. every scenario he’s imagined, every position he’s daydreamed. his mind overloads with all the possibilities, causing his body to blank and still – while you’re still just there, waiting for him.

he shakes his head, settling on the decision that he’ll drop to his knees and return the favour. taste your slick between his teeth, unravel you on his tongue and feel you around his fingers. he almost drools just picturing it. 

BANG. BANG. 

sunghoon leaps from his skin at the sudden noise, whipping his head to the door and watching it shake in its frame, the knob wiggling. there’s overlapping voices on the other side yelling out your name, but you don’t seem the least bit rattled. 

you take it upon yourself to tuck sunghoon back into his pants, zipping it shut and giving his thigh a little pat – as if to reassure him. his heart would swell with affection, if only it wasn’t completely gripped with fear. 

“no need to worry!” you call out to the concerned shouts, then flash sunghoon an apologetic glance. “sorry about all that, excuse me.”

you cross the room to the door casually, as if you’re just letting in some guests to your home. you move the chair to the side, flick the lock and step back expectantly – the door flying open and slamming into the wall from the force. 

staff swarm you and fuss about, forming a protective blockade around you. that annoying receptionist appears at the door, pointing at sunghoon with a glare – then your security is quick to follow and hone in on him. sunghoon braces himself to sprint, to fight if he must, but you intervene; calling out to the guards and shooing them away from him like flies. 

“yes, yes. i’m alright.” you brush off your dress, throwing sunghoon a deliberate smile over your shoulder. “just catching up with a friend.”

not one of your crew buy that for one second, but without any signs of a visible struggle (and your own word), sunghoon knows that they can’t put a single finger on him. he smirks to himself, the power surge pumping hot in his veins. 

your crew are about to usher you back outside – sunghoon picking up scattered murmurs, one of which being that a few fans were arrested – but the circle halts with you as you spin on your heel, weaving through your staff and standing in front of sunghoon like everyone in this room isn’t watching. 

his heart beats like a rabid hare thumping its foot, head light and airy from the adrenaline. 

you reach for his fingers, lacing them with yours gently, and sunghoon catches your staff bracing themselves behind. you pay them no mind. 

“i’ll see you in sydney?” you smile. not one of your practiced or artificial ones – genuine. a bright ray of light to warm him and only him. 

sunghoon melts. he nods, pulse frenzied under the swipe of your thumb on his wrist. like hell he wouldn’t be there.

your smile splits even wider into your cheeks, eyes sparkling. 

“it’s a date then.”

—

following his impulsive stunt at the airport, sunghoon only narrowly avoided arrest, which he suspects is because of your own interference. he’s still able to catch the flight directly after yours and follow you en route to australia. 

which– well, you came onto him, so what law was really broken on his part? none that seemed to bother you too much, seeing as you were more than happy to shove his cock in your mouth.

sunghoon hasn’t washed since. he doesn’t want to scrub off the traces of your saliva, doesn’t want to smother your touch with his own; knowing it couldn’t begin to compare. he could almost cry from the pain of his boners when replaying the memory, but he refuses to relieve it himself. 

riding on that extreme high, sunghoon has the confidence to text your number. he bought it from some staff members ages ago but couldn’t find the words to strike up a conversation, one that’d catch your eye among all the other fans choking up your private messages. 

typing out and backspacing for what might’ve been hours, sunghoon settles on literally just stating his name and a simple hello. 

he doesn’t think he needs any more than that, really. you already remembered his face, name, the penguin he crocheted – and sucked him off – so you’re well acquainted at this point. 

he may as well just ask you out, right? he knows for a fact that you’re not exactly handing out blowjobs like candy for fans. you have self-respect, you’re a romantic at heart. you wouldn’t just.. throw yourself at anyone, not if it didn’t mean something. right? 

he’s known you’re the one for him, only one all these years – and it seems just getting you in a room alone is how it clicked for you, too. 

strung along by red twine, dancing around your fate at concerts and events – then pulled as if on a leash, until you were on your knees and wrapping your mouth around him. 

sunghoon stuffs his face in his hands as it burns red, rolling around in the hotel bed and giggling to himself. fuck, what a slowburn. such a damn tease. you like the chase, huh? you like seeing him lose his fucking mind, pining after you? 

at the sudden ding of his phone, he rises upright in bed like a vampire and swipes the device from his side table – heart palpitations revving up like a harley as he reads your name in the notification. 

you actually answered. 

not a question on how he got your number, or why he locked you in that room, or what he even wants from you. you happily greet him right back. ask about his flight, if he’s settled in alright. 

and then you just… talk. like real people do. 

naturally, he’s got access to your schedule, so he knows how impossibly busy you’ll be within the day, every hour accounted for leading up to the concert. but you still find time to text him back, to engage in conversation and inquire about how he’s doing like the absolute sweetheart you are. you get to know him, really know him, outside of just the devilishly handsome guy who’s made your music his entire personality. you don’t talk a whole lot about yourself – but all of it goes without saying. sunghoon already knows everything there is to know about you except for what goes on in your actual brain.

you seem.. bored, almost. like he’s the most interesting thing you’ve got going on, as a world famous popstar. conversations turning dull when he asks about your life off the clock – but you’ll light right up when you’re talking about him. asking about his hobbies and his schooling and his parents.

each word sunghoon trades with you feels like he’s boiling alive and then dipped in ice water. it’s startling how it all feels so natural, flowing and blooming into something genuine. sunghoon would have you in any way he’d be lucky enough to get – as in sick with fear or scathing with hatred – but he’s not equipped to understanding what it actually is. you’re giving him your time because you get along, and you think he’s hot and you laugh at his jokes. 

you never mention how he’s followed you across the globe, how he’s always there as an audience when you’re performing or when you’re not even working. but, then again, you also might not even care. considering you’re still chatting him up over text despite it all when you could’ve just.. let the authorities deal with him. 

the day of your concert, sunghoon arrives to camp outside of the stadium before the sun’s even up. he’s joined by some familiar faces (jake among them, who flips him off and doesn’t acknowledge him again) while waiting through the sweltering southern heat, eyes glued to his phone as he waits for you to text him back in fleeting increments throughout the day. 

he never doubted it, but sunghoon’s amazed by how he keeps falling even deeper in love with you. it’s like you couldn’t give less of a fuck about who he is and what he does – about who you are and why you shouldn’t even be allowing him space in your life. 

but circumstances can be damned where fate is concerned. 

in the end, it’s you and him. 

it’s like heaven’s gates parting when the crowd’s finally allowed inside the venue, sunghoon rushing in for his rightful spot at the barricade. time crawls by painstakingly slow, bodies packed in like sardines and overlapping voices like nails on a chalkboard to his ears. the hours are punctuated with a reply or two from you, and the bliss is enough to get him through the wait. right up until you text him that you’re nervous, he wishes you good luck, and within the next minute you’re raised up onto the stage via platform for the soundcheck. 

your eyes find sunghoon in an instant. you trade big, cheesy grins like two puppies in love – confused whispers and jealous glares rolling through the crowd. 

you go about performing as usual, singing an interesting choice of tracks, on the spicier side of your discography. you even make it a point to dance a little for him, standing on the edge of the stage to give him an upskirt view – even checking if he’s looking with a cheeky smile. his cock throbs where it’s pressed into the railing, the cold metal ineffective in deterring it. god, he’s fucking crazy about you. 

when the soundcheck comes to a torturous end, you throw sunghoon a wink, holding his heated stare as you disappear below the stage. 

well. after all that he thinks he needs a good fucking wank. 

he’s so dazed in his own little world, sunghoon doesn’t even register the crowd parting behind him – not until he’s being grabbed on the shoulder, a gruff male voice low in his ear. 

a security guard roughly spins him around, leading him out of the pit, his beloved barricade spot being filled within the next second. sunghoon can’t even bring himself to feel pissed off at the loss of his view or at the smug grins of jealous motherfuckers in the crowd – not when his heart sinks below his feet and his mind spins at a mile a minute as the guard pushes him through various dark corners and empty corridors. 

did it all catch up to him? were you really fooling him? this is it, isn’t it? you were just building a case against him. you didn’t actually like him. 

pfft, who was he kidding? you’ve got the evidence ready, the police are actively waiting outside to take him away in cuffs. oh fuck he’s so stupid. he’s so fucking stupid. this is what he gets for giving his heart to a woman, a celebrity at that. you’d never want him. there’s no way he’s the first fan you’ve done this with. he’s just a placeholder. you think you’re too good for him. you–

“sunghoon!” 

the sound of your voice slices through his racing thoughts. the sight of your face hits him like an arrow to the chest, his thumper heart threatening to leap from his ribs. 

you coo out something to him he can’t quite catch over the ringing in his ears – followed by a flick of your wrist to direct the security guard back out the door they came from. 

you’re still dressed in the soundcheck outfit, covered in a thin sheen of sweat that makes your skin appear as if glowing, cloying in the air with a faint perfume. he thinks you’ve never looked prettier like this, out of breath and clammy; perceiving you without the filter of that perfectly curated idol image. 

you set down an empty bottle of water before pacing over, stopping just before him. barely one step and he could close this distance. is that what you want?

“hey,” you get his attention, regarding him with such a soft smile that he nearly drops to his knees right then. “how was it?” 

“good–” he answers plainly before stepping to you, leaving no time to react before both of his hands are swallowing either side of your waist. your breath hitches as he tugs you in, pressing himself flush against your front. “–you do this type of fan service often?” he grits out, locking much harsher words behind his teeth. 

“what?” you stare cluelessly with big lost eyes, gasping when his fingers dig in until his nails sting your flesh. 

“i can’t be the only one, right? fuck, i’m so dumb.” he chuckles bitterly to himself. “you trying to get more money out of me? or is this some kind of sick fun to you?” sunghoon shakes you in his arms, riling himself up more by the second. “huh? you enjoy leading your fans on?? tell me honestly please, don’t treat me like an idiot any more.”

“no.” you say, so firmly that it actually takes him aback. “i’d be in more trouble than you if anyone–”

sunghoon laughs, laughs at how absurd this situation is. how he’s wished and prayed for a chance to have you this close and now all he can feel is rage. his hand flies up to your hair, tugging your head back – the startled noise you let out going straight to his stiffening cock. 

“you’re a slut, then? you let your fans use you so they keep coming back?” he pouts dramatically at you, before bearing his canines in a grin. “or are you hoping that we’ll leave you alone?”

the slope of your neck bobs with a gulp, his eyes tracking the movement. “i let you, because i like you.”

you watch his eyes flit rapidly over your face, searching desperately for any sign that you’re lying, playing him like a fool again. 

“bet you tell them all that.” he huffs, not buying it for a second. “bet they all fall for it too.”

“there is no–” you scrunch your face when his fist curls tighter in your hair, letting out a noise that sounds nothing like frustration or fear. he could almost think that you’re.. 

“hoon.” you say sternly, the nickname catching him off-guard. his heart would almost swell over it if he wasn’t so close to ripping your fucking hair out in jealousy. “there is nobody else. i’ve been texting you because i want to. i asked my guard to bring you here so i could see you. god, i blew you at an airport! i’ve never even..”

you sigh, exasperated, and the pieces finally slide into place for sunghoon. they click slowly, even reluctantly, since the circumstances really are this hard to believe. 

“you mean it?..” he mutters, fingers loosening in your strands. 

“yes, of course i do.” testing the waters, your palms run up his chest to hold his cheeks with a featherlight touch, and sunghoon melts into it. “i see you all the time, and i’ve always wanted to get to know you more. but what could i do? nothing from my position.”

you want love, just like him. you want him, just like he wants you. 

you don’t care about his intentions when he dragged you from your staff and locked you in a room. you don’t even care that he followed you all the way here from korea. you don’t give a single shit that he pays off your staff to provide him enough private info to warrant a lawsuit. 

“you want me?” 

“of course i do.” you echo, thumbs brushing tenderly across the pale of his cheek. 

he licks his lips, anticipation and something more sinister bubbling in his blood, heating up his body. “say it.” 

“i want you.” 

sunghoon nearly moans hearing it from your mouth, his cock filling out his pants eagerly. he gives another tug on your hair, and his suspicions are confirmed when you whine. you like the pain. or do you just like being treated this way?

“do you now?” he says nearly mockingly, swiping his thumb across the plush of your lip to contrast the sting. you respond keenly: lips sealing around his thumb, dabbing your tongue on the skin. sunghoon curses lowly, breath growing heavier, and when you start to suck he has to pull away.  

only to replace his hand with his mouth as he captures yours in a kiss. there’s no patience in it – one second in and already he needs more, tilting your head by the hair as he shoves his tongue in. licking against yours roughly, palate filling with your saliva, cock twitching as he tastes every corner of your mouth. 

you ball fists in his shirt, whimpering quietly at how harshly he’s kissing you, how he’ll slightly pull your hair like a reminder. you just take it, better yet – you give back. you slide your tongue with his, rolling your hips into his body and earning a bite on your lower lip. you whine from the shock and sunghoon parts with you, tutting. 

“you trying to piss me off?” he huffs out, stilling you by the waist with his free hand. you’re treading a fine fucking line of his self-control right now. if you’re not careful, he might really lose it. and he doesn’t want to hurt you – unless you want that. fuck. his cock pulses just considering it, and of course you felt it, flashing him a cheeky grin. 

“do your worst.” you tell him, intentionally bucking your pelvis forward to rub against his boner. he feels the heat of you even through the fabric, and sunghoon heaves a gasp, every nerve in his body screaming to throw you to the ground and just take you. 

there comes that fucking nickname again, “hoon”, needily whined against his earlobe – and you could hear a pin drop in the brief silence that follows, before his lips are smothering yours so desperately that his teeth scrape your gums, hands gripping impossibly tighter as he backs you into the closest wall. 

sunghoon nearly shoves your body against it, kindness forgotten with his brain tuned into one sole purpose. he kisses you like he’s trying to consume you, palm trailing down the side of your body, stopping only to grope your breast here or squeeze your curves there. if he wasn’t so fired up, he’d take his time with you. kiss every inch of your body and draw out the pleasure. his cock is begging him for otherwise though. 

he reaches a hand under this fucking skirt that’s burned into the deepest pit of his memories – and you moan in tandem when sunghoon’s fingers press into your panties, the fabric dipping where it’s soaked in your arousal. he has to remind himself to breathe as he runs his fingertips over the thin cotton, feeling each ridge from how it’s stuck to your cunt in arousal. 

he slides a finger past the soiled fabric, dipping into the hot arousal pooled at your hole. his length pulses where it’s pressed into the meat of your thigh. sucking in a breath, sunghoon trudges past his own need as he gathers your slick on his index and middle, dragging the fingers up your folds. you shiver when he grazes your clit, melting into the prettiest whine as his fingers draws digit eights on the bundle of nerves. 

with his hand focused on your clit, sunghoon busies his mouth when he latches it to your neck, smirk pressed into your skin with how you throb under his fingers in response. sunghoon runs his tongue over the juncture between your neck and shoulder, littering the skin with nips of his teeth and sucks of his mouth – leaving the mark of his presence in hickeys and bites. he laves at the salty sheen of sweat coating your body, eyes rolling into the back of his head as he tastes you in yet another way. 

on that thought, he rotates his hand; thumb replacing the fingers on your clit with firm swipes, his index and middle breaching past your hole and curling up to make you see stars. 

you’re unintelligible as he fucks you on his fingers, head lolled back into the wall as he ravages the slope of your neck, clenching down so perfectly he damn nearly cums just wondering how it’d feel wrapped around his cock. 

“shit,” he groans as he presses particularly hard into your g-spot, feeling how tightly you wrapped around the digits as if on command. he rips his hand from your cunt suddenly, and you gasp at the sound of fabric tearing when he pulls your panties further to the side. 

sunghoon licks at his fingers just so he can taste you down there too, your slick sweet on his palate. though it only serves to snap the last shred of his resolve, and before either of you know it he’s ripping his pants open so quick that the button flies to the floor – cock bobbing free and pressed to your cunt within the next second.

sunghoon lets out a sob, vision whiting out from how unbelievable you feel against him: your hole twitching where he’s just barely pressing his tip, a mix of your arousal and his pre running down his length. he bucks his pelvis slightly, cock rubbing through your wet folds. his tip nudges your clit and you both just tremble.

it takes everything in him and then some to not just thrust in and pound you like a dog in heat. 

sunghoon tries to gather the words to ask for your permission, but all that leaves him is a hoarse exhale, cock pulsing where it’s buried between your folds. you snap him out of the daze when a hand comes to wraps around his bicep, preparing to ground yourself. 

“i want it in,” you ask so nicely, batting your lashes at the man heaving like a beast before you. “please?” 

that word singlehandedly airs out every thought left in his brain. sunghoon doesn’t even think, just acts as he snaps his pelvis and splits your pussy on his cock. one swift movement and he’s buried all the way in; balls pressed to your ass, body slumped against yours as you barely keep yourself upright. 

you’re both a mess, arms wrapping around each other as an anchor, bodies pressed so tight your heartbeats start to hammer as one. sunghoon grinds forward, soiling his balls in the dripping arousal as he attempts to gently stretch you out. for your comfort, and for his own dignity, so he doesn’t cum right the fuck now. he knows he should’ve prepped you more, but he might have died from blood loss if he didn’t give attention to his raging boner for any longer. 

although.. you’ve got a death grip around his cock. sunghoon usually jerks off hard and fast with a fist clenched so tight that it hurts, and still he can’t do anything but direct his own breathing as your cunt adjusts to his size. in and out, in and out.. 

fuck.

“fuck!” sunghoon cries out as he gives a quick thrust, barely even pulling out before sinking deeper, tip nudging your cervix as you gasp a moan. “f-fuck, fuck–” his hips stutter before they find a pace, bracing his hands on the wall behind as he drives his cock into you over and over. 

your knuckles turn white where they’re holding onto his back for dear life, he’s sure to find tracks of scratches across the muscles tomorrow. yet he can’t even feel the sting over your pussy sucking him in – perfect. so perfect in how you flutter around his length with each thrust, your pretty whimpers and cries as he rams into your g-spot every time.

“god– you..you’re taking it!”

you babble out something that might be a reply, trembling fingers reaching for his neck to hold his face close. his chest twists with pure love for you. everything he’s done in your name, it paid off. it surmounted to this. you let him in, and now he’ll give you his blood. 

“let me?” sunghoon pleads in a broken voice, hanging on by the thinnest thread as he pounds you into the wall, his lower belly coiled dangerously tight. he wants to cum inside you so bad. he wants to ruin you for anyone else. “let me, pleasepleaseplease–”

“yes, yes!” you plead right back, mouth falling open as he picks up to an animalistic speed. 

a few good thrusts later and sunghoon’s spilling inside you, pace undeterred as he focuses on fucking as deep as possible inside you. cockhead dribbling warm ropes of cum into the bump of your cervix. 

sunghoon slumps all of his weight onto yours as he chases his breaths, still nestled deep inside and groaning with each pulse of his cock. the comedown leaves him in some halfway point between heaven; bliss floating through his veins, a smile carved deep onto his lips. 

this time, he pinches himself to check – and when he blinks, it all stays right where it was. 

even in your state, you catch the gesture and breathe out a laugh, too exhausted to get the noise out. your knuckles run over his forearms, wondering when he’ll start to soften inside you. 

sunghoon starts to kiss your neck again, and you have the realisation that he intends to keep going. you push him off you gently, reaching down to slip his still-hard cock out. 

“as much as i don’t want to, i need to get back to work.” you remind him, your concert still very much looming on the evening. 

sunghoon grimaces like the fact personally offends him – though he’s not sulking for long as he watches you pull him out and then tug your underwear back in place with one quick motion, soiling the fabric as his cum stuffs your cunt. 

“i’m sorry about your spot,” you say, tenderly cupping his cheek and giving him soft eyes. “my staff know who you are now, and they could escort you to the private box?” 

sunghoon nods, smiling stretching even wider, flashing his canines. he doesn’t need to prove he’s not a threat – you know, and you don’t care. 

you brush your skirt down back into place. “i’ll see you after the send-off wraps up?” 

you don’t have to tell him where you’ll be. the place that your staff picked out for post-show dinner and drinks. he already paid to know that. and you’d know this too. 

but you don’t mention it as you leave him with a sweet kiss on the lips. in fact, he doesn’t think you ever will. 

—

sunghoon didn’t know he had this much love in his body. all the blood that keeps his heart beating isn’t close to enough for what he wishes to give to you. his girlfriend. his world famous, popstar, funny and talented and gorgeously perfect girlfriend. ever since he first called you that he just can’t stop saying it. 

sunghoon has a sort of notoriety now within his community of your fandom. he went silent following the infamous airport stunt and the guard pulling him from the sydney pit – and a few photos with someone resembling him at the after-show dinner had made the rounds around fans with insider connections. it was all kept very hush-hush, hadn’t made it to any outlets thank god. out of jealousy, he assumes. he made it and they didn’t. 

you’ve fully opened yourselves to each other, much like normal couples do. he promised to leave that life behind for good, and feels immense shame for everything he did leading up to dating you. 

and, cross his heart, he does. but after years of chasing this exact goal, he can’t but feel a thousandfold more obsessed with you. his girlfriend. you’re still his entire purpose in life. he gave up everyone else in his life who wasn’t you, so when you’re too busy with work to listen to him ranting on and on about how much he adores you, who else is he meant to turn to?

Anonymous posted: We all know that y/n’s been dating lately. With the way she limps on stage, I bet she lets her boyfriend fuck her right before she goes on. He cums inside her, stuffs her full and puts her panties right back on so it’s all sealed tight inside. Performing and dancing around for the crowd with her man’s cum still hot in her pussy. 

smooothoperator: shit that sounds so hot

heesung64: I’d kill to be her boyfriend and do that everyday

doggystyle02: fuck you i know exactly who this is. fuck off and die

“Oh, yeah - just stopping by before my date tonight.” 

You nodded and Jiyong turned around, white tank exposing his tattoos and you swallowed as you smiled at him. He pulled you in for a hug before moving to the floor to stretch his back. He’d just finished his sound check and he was sore from the months of being on tour.

“You good, bud?”

“Bud?” He looked up at you with a smirk.

“Are we not buddies, pals?” He rolled his eyes, expanding his stretch.

“I’m fine.” He huffed. 

You watched him for a minute, Daesung almost forgotten in the background when he spilled his bag. You turned to look at him as he quickly scooped up his items. It all appeared to be things he needed for his date tonight and you raised a brow when you saw what appeared to be a chocolate bar, “GET IN THE MOOD” spelled across the wrapping.

“What’s that?”

“What’s what?” He went for the bar trying to hide it, but Jiyong had also clocked it.

“Is that that sex chocolate?” He snorted. Before Daesung could respond, Jiyong had crossed the room, taking the bar. “What do you need this for, you aren’t fifty.”

“It just adds an extra layer of fun.” Jiyong raised a brow, stuffing the chocolate into his pocket.

“I’m sure it doesn’t even work.” 

“Can I please have that back?”

“No.” Jiyong folded his arms. “I’m going to keep this. Can’t have it getting out that the youngest member needs help in that department.” 

Daesung looked at you for help and you shrugged. He groaned and grabbed his stuff, waving goodbye to you both. His girlfriend was going to be mad about the chocolate, but not as mad as she would be if he was late. Once he was gone, Jiyong set the chocolate down on the table between the two of you.

“What are the odds this stuff actually works?” You shrugged, pulling your phone out to look at a new instagram notification.

“It probably doesn’t.” 

“We should try it then.” Your head whipped up to look at him.

“What? Why?”

“It’ll be fun.” You rolled your eyes, knowing that once Jiyong had an idea in his head there was no backing out.

“You really think this is a good idea?”

“What’s the worst that could happen?”

You shrugged, grabbed the candy bar and took a piece, holding it out for him. He smirked as he popped the treat into his mouth. There was no way this was going to work. You both sat, waiting, for what, you weren’t sure. Some kind of sign it was working? It would be easier if you weren’t already turned on just by Jiyong’s existence. His phone rang and you realized you’d be staring at him. He smirked because of course he’d noticed and answered the phone.

“Oppa!” Chaerin’s voice rang out loud enough for you to hear and you flinched. “You ruined date night.”

“Aish. What are you talking about?” He pulled the phone back slightly, a frown on his face.

“You took those chocolates. Dae and I were supposed to have a wild night tonight. What are you even doing with them?”

“You’ll live. I’m just trying them out.” He shrugged.

“With who?”

“Y/N.” You could hear Chaerin cackle through the phone and you bit your lip. Jiyong’s lips pulled into a smirk. Suddenly all you could think about was his lips on yours.

“Good luck.” She disconnected the call and Jiyong slid his phone into his pocket, raising a brow at you.

“You okay?” You nodded, licking your lips, Jiyong’s eyes trailed your movements and he had to stop himself from groaning. 

“Peachy.” 

You were the furthest thing from okay, but Jiyong didn’t need to know that. You both knew there was something between you, refusing to act on it because you meant too much to each other. You turned back to your phone and Jiyong moved to get ready for his set.  

You didn’t mean to look, but you couldn’t help it. He was pulling his pants up and all you could think about was pulling them back down. Sucking him off right then and there before his set. You bit your lip, forcing yourself to turn back to your phone. Fucking chocolates. 

You hadn’t realized that once you looked away, Jiyong was looking at you. The way your hair fell on your face, the dip of skin at your collarbone driving him wild. He wanted to taste every inch of you. But there was no time so instead he turned, adjusted his pants because of course just the sight of you had left him hard. 

“How do I look?” You didn’t want to look up at him because you knew he looked fucking sinful. You steadied yourself as you looked up at him with a small smile on your face. 

“Eh. I’ve seen better.” You shrugged. 

Jiyong rolled his eyes and headed for the door. His gaze low as he walked past you. You were both fighting a losing battle, the problem is that neither of you knew it. You stood slowly, stretching, your shirt lifting to reveal your stomach and Jiyong’s eyes lingered even after you turned to face him. You blushed, he smirked again and led you out of the room. 

You stood slightly backstage as Jiyong took to the stage, commanding the crowd as he went. The confidence he oozed was next level and you knew in that moment the chocolates were working on him too. You stood, legs pressed together trying not to think about his body pressed against yours as he moved around the stage. 

He was watching you, trying not to make it obvious. He was more aware of your presence than he’d ever been. The way your knees were locked, your skirt riding up your thighs just right. He regretted the leather pants. He threw his jacket off, undoing his tie and he watched the way you licked your lips. He pushed his hair back with a smirk. Maybe he was enjoying this too much. 

The final notes of Too Bad rang out and Jiyong said goodbye to the crowd. You hadn’t realized you were breathing heavily until Jiyong was standing in front of you. Your eyes met and the rest of the world faded away. No words spoken as you made your back to his sitting room.

The door closed and suddenly Jiyong was everywhere. His arms locking you in place against the wall, his lips on yours. Your hand tangled in his tank top as you pulled him closer, his fingers tilted your chin just right to allow better access and his tongue licked at your bottom lip. 

You moaned as your tongues met. God how long had you wanted this? The way your body was reacting, you’d guess you’d been wanting this since the first time you’d ever laid eyes on him. His hands moved down your body, under your skirt. He hovered, lips moving from your mouth slightly. 

“Is this ok?”

“God yes.” You managed between pants.

His lips back on yours and his finger brushed against your panties. You were soaked, you knew it and now he knew it’s you swallowed his moan before he broke away from the kiss. His mouth on your neck, and then he was nipping at your earlobe.

“You’re fucking dripping and I haven’t even touched you yet.” He groaned in your ear. 

There was no hesitation as his teeth skimmed over your collarbone. His fingers pushed past your panties and slid right on in, past your slick folds, curling just right. You didn’t know if it was the chocolates or if it was just that Kwon Jiyong was an expert with his hands, but god was this good. 

Your hips moved, grinding on his hand and every so often you’d brush against him, his erection tight in his pants. You needed him. He moved his fingers quickly inside you, setting a pace that was so delicious you weren’t sure you’d be able to hold on for very long - not that you wanted to.  He added his thumb, circling your clit and when you let out the prettiest moan he’d ever heard, his lips moved back to yours, swallowing the sounds. 

Your hand moved to plan his erection and he groaned into your mouth, fingers moving quicker. You could feel it in your entire body - you were going to come. And you did, one hand bunched into his tank top, the other rubbing him through his pants. 

“That’s one.” He whispered, his lips brushing yours as he spoke. “Let’s go for two.”

He dropped to his knees and you whined at the lack of contact. His eyes locked on yours as he slowly pulled your skirt and panties down. You stepped out of them, your heels clicking on the tiled floor. Jiyong’s eyes flashed with lust as he looked down at you. His lips made contact with your thigh and you shivered in anticipation. 

“You have no idea how many times I’ve thought about this.” His teeth sunk into your skin leaving a mark. 

“Thought about what?” 

“Making you scream my name.” His lips moved slowly to your dripping center and his tongue swirled around your clit. 

“What makes you think I haven’t?” The chocolates were making you brave. His eyes snapped up to yours.

“You think about me when you touch yourself?” His voice vibrated against your clit and he looked back down, tongue teasing you again. 

“Y-yes.” You managed to get out. 

Jiyong’s eves flashed, and he inserted a finger as his tongue lapped at your clit. He moved his free hand to your left thigh, throwing it over his shoulder for better access. Your hips angled, and you moved against his face as best you could. His nose brushed your pelvis and he hummed into you. The vibrations sending shockwaves through your body. 

You were already sensitive from his fingers and it didn’t take long for you to come apart, his name falling from your lips like a prayer and he smirked, as his tongue replaced his fingers. He didn’t let up, just moved quicker. 

“Ji-“ You hand tangled into his hair attempting to pull him back. 

His eyes met yours and you could feel him smirk, causing another moan as your body shook against him. 

“Ji I already.” He flicked his tongue and you stopped talking, your head falling against the wall. 

He was going to make you come again, which was hardly fair considering you’d barely touched him. He was relentless, tongue moving in ways you didn’t think was possible, you could feel yourself dripping all over him and when you came for a third time, Jiyong stayed put, savoring the taste of you. 

He rocked back on his heels, looking up at you with a smug smirk. His lips and nose coated in your slick before he stood up, pulling you in for another kiss. You moaned as the taste of you swirled with him, your head fuzzy from the three previous orgasms. 

“Turn around.” You blinked, doing as you were told, your body shaking. 

You could hear his zipper, the sound of the leather pants hitting the floor, and then you felt him. His erection against your folds as you bent every so slightly. Your hands flat against the wall. 

He entered you slowly, you were tight against his cock and he groaned as he got used to the feeling of being inside of you. You felt his dick twitch and you turned your head, your hips moving. 

“Ji?” 

“Need a second.” He managed to get out and you smirked. 

That was apparently all he needed before he moved his hips, pulling out of you completely before slamming into you. You weren’t so cocky anymore as he set a quick, rough pace. His hand locking into your hair, pulling your head back. He could do this all night, you could too. 

The angle was perfect for him to hit your sweet spot with each thrust and you could feel yourself getting closer with each thrust. You cried out his name as your stomach muscles tightened, your head dizzy from everything he’d done to you so far. His fingers tightened in your hair, holding you through your next orgasm. 

It didn’t take long after that before Jiyong jerked out of you, his release sputtering across your back. You stood still as Jiyong tore his tank top off, cleaning you off gently. It was quite the contrast to how you’d been since you entered the room. He spun you around, his eyes locking on yours. 

You were both out of breath and very sweety but you couldn’t help the smile forming on your face. His matched yours and he leaned in, pecking your lips gently. 

“Come on. Let’s go shower and try for five.” 

“Ji-“ You leaned down, pulling your skirt back up. “It’s just the chocolates, isn’t it? You don’t really want this.” 

“I don’t need any chocolates to know that I’ve wanted you for a long time.”  He tilted his head to the side. “Was it just the chocolates for you?”

“No.” You admitted and the smile returned to Jiyong’s face.

“Okay, so my place. Showers, round five, and maybe if you’re good, dinner.” You laughed, but agreed.

That’s how you found yourself for the rest of the night, tangled in the sheets with your best friend, having hands down the best sex of your life. You didn’t know what this meant for your future with Jiyong, but you had time to figure all of that out later. For now, you just wanted to enjoy this moment and maybe thank Daesung the next time you saw him.

It hit you all at once, the events of the day and you closed your eyes like that would make the headache go away. I’ve been in an accident, my arm is broken. My head is more broken. Jiyong is looking at me like that because apparently we’re married. You reminded yourself of the facts that you know, even if they seemed crazy, slowly opening your eyes. 

“I just need more medicine.” Jiyong turned on his heel, dashing for the kitchen where the pain killers sat. 

He was mentally kicking himself for not leaving them with you in the first place. Of course you were going to need another dose, he should’ve made sure you took some before you went to sleep. He grabbed the bottle, reading the instructions carefully before bringing them back to you. 

“Thanks.” You offered up a smile, popping the pills into your mouth and setting back onto the bed. “It’s kind of spooky in here at night.” 

Jiyong smirked and moved over to the tv unit across from the bed, flipping a switch. Twinkle lights illuminated the space around the tv, disappearing into the curtains by the window. It had you written all over it. 

It was a crisp fall night in Seoul, Jiyong had never been more grateful for the warmth of his apartment as he sat down the last of your boxes in the living room. It had taken him two months to convince you to move in with him. You thought your apartment was better, he knew his was. 

It lacked personality you’d said the first time you’d ever stayed the night. Jiyong had just rolled his eyes and promised you that when you moved in because duh, he was going to marry you one day, you could decorate however you wanted. 

“Dinner?” He asked but when he turned you weren’t there. “Jagi where did you go?” 

“In here!” Your voice called out from the bedroom. 

Jiyong made his way to the master suite, blinking when he saw you standing on a kitchen chair, hanging lights around the tv. Iye watched you closely from the bed and Jiyong huffed. 

“Traitor.” He mumbled to the cat before turning back to you. “What are you doing?” 

“The black out curtains make it too dark in here.” You put a hand up to stop him from whatever remark he was about to make, Jiyong’s mouth closing, the smirk reappearing on his lips. “I know you like to sleep until noon and that’s fine, my baby needs his beauty rest. But I like mood lighting and you said I had free reign when I moved in.” 

“You remember that?” 

“Honey, I remember everything.” You turned to face him, a grin on your face. “Flip the switch for me.” 

Jiyong rolled his eyes, but moved to flip the switch. The lights turning on, a soft sparkle in the dark room. He hated to admit it was perfect. 

“There. Not so spooky, or bright.” You jumped down from the chair, carelessly, kissing Jiyong’s cheek as you walked past him and turned to face the bed. “Thoughts on purple throw pillows?” 

Jiyong shook his head, picked you up and threw you on the bed. You giggled as you landed on your back, arm opening to invite him to join you. 

Jiyong blinked the memory away, swallowing another lump in his throat. He wondered how much a person was supposed to take before they fully broke. 

“I just need to grab some stuff and I’ll be on my way.” You nodded.

Jiyong moved around the room, gathering some of his personal items. You couldn’t help but feel guilty for kicking him out of his own space. With a handful of clothing items, Jiyong nodded at you and you sighed. 

“Maybe you should take this room.” Jiyong shook his head, arms holding his items tightly against his chest. 

“From the moment you moved in this was yours. You’ve slept in here more nights than I have anyway. I promise you, I’m fine in the guest room.” 

“Okay.” You chewed on your bottom lip, watching as Jiyong turned to leave. “Ji?” 

He closed his eyes, taking a minute before he turned around. He didn’t know if you’d remembered he preferred it when you called him Ji, or if you were just too tired to say his full name and he wasn’t sure he wanted to find out. 

“Yeah?”

“How long have I lived here?” 

“Almost three years. You moved in six months after we started dating.” 

“Really?” Your eyes widened, you hadn’t expected that. You’d never wanted to move in with anyone else you’d dated. 

“Yeah. I asked you to move in four months after we started dating.” He shrugged. 

“That seems quick.” 

“Your neighborhood sucked.” 

“There is nothing wrong with Hongdae.” You rolled your eyes, Jiyong smirked. 

“Hannam-dong is objectively better.” 

“Whatever.” You couldn’t help the small smile forming on your face. 

“Get some sleep.” He turned, leaving the room. 

Once Jiyong was on the other side of the room, he threw his stuff down on the couch. Moving back to the door, he closed it slowly, his eyes watching you slowly. The pain of you, his wife, being on the other side of the door but completely out of reach. He wouldn’t wish this kind of pain on anyone. 

He moved his stuff into the guest room, with no desire to sleep in there. He could count on one hand the amount of times he’d even been in this room. Once when you’d had the flu so bad you’d demanded he sleep as far away from you as possible. 

It lasted two hours before he was cuddled up next to you, getting sick two days later. Another time when you’d decided that in order to officially move in you needed to have sex in every room of the house to know where the best spot was. And tonight. Three times in the many years he’d lived here.

He shook his head, leaving the room and heading back to the couch. At least from here he’d hear you if you needed him again. He’d sleep in the guest room tomorrow, after you were more settled. 

After an hour of staring at the ceiling, Jiyong sighed and made his way to the kitchen. Turning on the burner - the front right one, the back left was still broken, he placed the kettle down. His eyes stayed fixed on the broken burner, you’d just yelled at him for it a week ago. He wondered if you would ever even remember something so small. If you would even get any of your memories back. 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘

You awoke to Iye scratching at the door. It took a good minute before you remembered where you were and why there was a cat there. But you remembered, and you didn’t panic scream that time, so progress? You moved carefully from the bed, grabbed your pill bottle and downed a couple pain killers before making your way across the room. 

Opening the door, Iye shot out and a few seconds later you heard his voice. It was muffled and low and you peeked around the wall to find him laying on the couch. 

“You slept on the couch?” Jiyong jumped and turned to face you with a sheepish shrug. 

“Wouldn’t really call it sleeping.” 

“You should sleep, Jiyong.” He looked at you for a minute and you raised a brow. “What?” 

“Nothing.” He shook his head, “Sorry. Are you hungry?” 

“No, but I think Iye is.” 

As Jiyong worked on sorting out Iye you took your time looking around the apartment. Movies and books you’d brought from your old place filtered into the collections of items you didn’t recognize. His you assumed, or new things that had come out in the last three years. Your eyes stopped on a photo of the two of you. 

Without realizing, you reached for it, studying it closely. You looked happy, which admittedly didn’t fit into your whole “my friends and family sold me to a K-pop idol” scenario, but looks could be deceiving.  You wanted to ask Jiyong what this was from, but you had a feeling he wouldn’t tell you. Or he’d tell you too much and you’d never remember for yourself, so you didn’t.  Maybe if you looked at it long enough it would come back to you. 

Jiyong stopped in the room exhaling slowly when he noticed the picture. Halloween, last year. You’d just told him you wanted to start planning a family when Daesung had snapped the photo. Just two happy people ready for the next phase in their lives. He’d give anything to go back to that night. 

The music was loud, vibrating off the walls and bumping into the hallway as you and Jiyong made your way to Soohyuk’s unit. You’d rolled your eyes when you pulled up realizing the music was coming from his place. His neighbors had been praying for him to move for years and he stayed out of spite. 

“Mrs. Kim down the hall is going to have so much hate mail sent to him after tonight.” You giggled as you headed inside the apartment. 

Jiyong took his hat off, rubbing his hair before grinning down at you. Your stomach flipped, it always did when he smiled at you like that. Your crown nearly fell off your head as Soohyuk pulled you into a hug. 

“Jiyong! Y/N! It’s been too long!” You rolled your eyes, pushing him off you and straightening your crown.

“Rosalina.” Soohyuk raised a brow. “Mario and I are in character tonight.” 

Soohyuk looked at Jiyong who nodded and he rolled his eyes. “You two are insufferable. Shouldn’t Mario be with Peach?” 

“When he stumbled into Rosalina’s life he decided Bowser could have Peach, the star princess was more his type.” Soohyuk groaned and turned, walked away from you both. Muttering something about freaks as he went. 

You sat the picture down, stumbling backwards. You had no way of knowing when that was, or why you weren’t seeing Soohyuk as much. You just knew you didn’t like it. When you noticed Jiyong looking at you, you shook your head. 

“I need to shower.” You beelined it for the bedroom, shutting the door before Jiyong could follow you. 

You stood, back to the door for a minute taking deep, slow breaths. It was just a snippet. A snippet of a life you didn’t remember and it was overwhelming. You had so many questions, most of them revolving around Soohyuk. Did you really not see him anymore? Was there a bitterness between him and Jiyong? All feelings aside, they’d been best friends for a lot longer than you and Soohyuk had. You’d hate yourself if you came between them. 

You picked up your phone sending him a text, you needed to see him. You needed to know about whatever Halloween that was. You also really needed a shower. You sighed in defeat, opening the door a crack. 

“Ji?” He turned to face you, “Can you help me?” 

He nodded before fishing around the kitchen for Saran Wrap and plastic bags. He headed into the bedroom, wrapped your arm up extra tight, to be safe, and helped you undress, eyes closed of course. He waited in the bedroom while you showered, just to make sure you were ok. 

Once you were out, Jiyong helped you change and left you to finish getting ready on your own. You took your time, brushing out your hair and fumbled around the bathroom until you found your makeup. A slight upgrade to the brands you used now, but for the most part everything was still the same. 

“I’m having lunch with Soohyuk.” You announced as you made your back into the living room. 

“Okay? Do you need a ride?” 

“He’s picking me up.” 

As if on cue, there was a knock at the door. Jiyong sighed, making his way to the door and opened it slowly. He looked at Soohyuk for what felt like an eternity before the other man pulled him into a tight embrace. 

“Take care of her.” Jiyong mumbled and Soohyuk nodded. 

You waved and disappeared from sight. Nothing bad was going to happen under Soohyuk’s watch, Jiyong knew that. He couldn’t help the pang of jealousy creeping up inside of him, though. He knew it was silly. He knew you didn’t remember him. The logical side of his brain knew this made sense, for you to call in familiar. It didn’t make it hurt less. Iye meowed from his cat tree and Jiyong nodded. 

“I know. I miss her too.” 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘

“Are we not friends anymore?” 

“What?” Soohyuk looked up at you, mouth full of noodles. 

“I noticed a significant lack of texts when I reached out yesterday. And I had a memory, I guess. A snippet of one where it seemed like you didn’t see me much.” Soohyuk leaned back in his chair, hands folded on the table. 

“What memory?” 

“I was Rosalina? Jiyong was Mario.” 

“Halloween. I’d just gotten back from filming a movie, hadn’t seen you both in months.” You looked at you, a frown on his face. “Of course we’re still friends. You two are my best friends, you getting married didn’t change that.” 

“Oh. Okay. Good.” You took a bite of you meal. 

“But. You are married. We don’t go out every weekend. You don’t call me when you need something. Once you met Jiyong things changed.” 

“How? I don’t even remember liking him much that night we met.” Soohyuk smirked. 

“I’m not going to tell you everything, that’s up to you to remember. But you are crazy about your husband.” 

“Stop calling him that!” You groaned. “From what I can tell I’ve changed. I never wanted to settle down, get married. Move to some richy-rich neighborhood and live in a fucking penthouse.” You paused. “And I’m a dog person.” 

Soohyuk laughed, a real belly laugh and you blinked at him. You leaned back in your chair, you’d fold your arms if you could, but that cast weighed as much as you did. So you just sat and waited for him to finish.

“Sure. And then you met Jiyong and your entire world changed. I hate to break it to you, sis. You’re head over heels, madly in love with that man.” 

His phone buzzed, the screen lighting up and you looked down to see the contact picture he had of Jiyong. He’d always captured everyone at unflattering angles, and even if Jiyong looked goofy he looked good. He was too pretty for you, you’d always thought so when Soohyuk would bring him up in the past. 

“I don’t date pretty boys.” 

“No, but you married one.” He smirked and picked up the phone, walking away from the table. 

Soohyuk returned a few minutes later and you’d decided you had had enough. Soohyuk paid the bill and took you home, offering to walk you up but you declined. How hard could it be to find the penthouse? For someone with an intact mind, easy. But as you stood in the elevator, no code in hand you sighed. 

“Hello?” Jiyong picked up on the first ring, trying his best to act casual. 

“I don’t know the passcode.” You sounded small and Jiyong felt his chest tighten. He knew you well enough to know that you were trying not to panic. 

“Where’s Soohyuk?”

“I’m an idiot and told him I didn’t need help getting back.” Jiyong laughed despite the situation and you huffed, causing him to laugh harder. 

“It’s 1888.” 

“Of course it is.” You punched in the code, sighing in relief when the elevator doors closed. “Thanks.” 

Jiyong was waiting at the door when you got off the elevator that annoying smirk still on his face. It wasn’t your fault you couldn’t remember the code, he shouldn’t be taking such joy in it. 

“Not nice to make fun of a girl with amnesia.” You rolled your eyes as you walked past him, your tone light. 

“Uh, if the roles were reversed here you’d definitely make fun of me.” He followed you into the house, shutting the door behind him. “How’s Soohyuk?” 

“Still Soohyuk.” You shrugged, kicking your feet off. “Do you know why there's a snow emoji by your name in my phone?” 

“No?” He paused, looking up at the ceiling. “I honestly have no idea how your brain works sometimes.” 

You shrugged and made your way to your room, eyeing the couch as you went. Jiyong seemed to have a set up there and you sighed, deciding you’d fight the battle some other time. You sat down on the bed, pulling out a notebook from the bedside table.  You hesitated for a second as you looked down at your ring. Carefully, you slid it off your finger and placed it in the jewelry dish. The only way out of this was through it, and you needed to keep track of things. You flipped to an open page, leaned back on the bed and began writing. 

Soohyuk:

Friend, maybe not as close? 

Still prefers the noodle shop in my old neighborhood. 

Youngbae

Hasn’t called. Dead to me. 

Jiyong:

“Husband”

Let me be Rosalina for Halloween, despite the fact that Peach and Mario are “the ship” 

Elevator code is 1888.

Has the most annoying smirk

You closed the notebook and made your way to the living, sitting down silently on the couch. You couldn’t hide in the bedroom forever. Jiyong had a movie on and only glanced at you once as you curled up on the couch. 

Jiyong relaxed against the couch, it took everything in him not to reach out, to touch you. He noticed your small shiver and handed you a blanket, allowing himself one more glance at you. When you took the blanket he’d noticed it, the lack of a ring on your finger. He tried not to let it bother him, his jaw tight as he turned back to the tv. 

“You took your ring off.” It didn’t last long. 

“I-uh.” You turned to face him. “I just don’t feel right wearing it right now.” 

“Right. Yeah. I understand.” Jiyong nodded, standing up. “I’m gonna go to bed. Night.”

He needed to get out of there before he did something stupid, like cry in front of you. He barely made it in the room before the tears fell. If he was thinking logically he’d know this didn’t mean anything. It was a perfectly normal reaction to the situation, and Jiyong wasn't thinking logically. He wasn’t thinking logically when he called Youngbae, when he texted Soohyuk. He just needed somebody to calm him down and who better than the two guys who knew you both best? 

He wasn’t thinking logically when he slipped out of the room a few hours later to find you gone, Iye sleeping on the couch. He wasn’t thinking logically when he grabbed a bottle from the bar and made his way back to the room, Iye following him. He wasn’t thinking at all when he finally passed out a few hours later. He just needed to not hurt for a few hours.

It hadn’t been easy. It had taken at least two months after everything had happened before you’d come to the decision to finally get out of bed and make something of your life. You’d had no clue how to even begin to set up your own business but, luckily, you had some family friends who helped you through every step of the way. A couple of months later and your flower shop was up and running. Petals and Vines. It was labor of blood, sweat and tears. There had been so many moments when you’d thought about giving up but your father’s words rang through your ears each time — “you can do anything you set your mind to, don’t ever let anyone tell you any different.” It was what got you through each and every hard day since he’d gone.

“Yuri, can you pass me some of the pink peonies so I can finish up this bouquet,” you called out from the back to your co-worker. Today was a busy day for Petals and Vines. There was a big wedding later in the day and they had chosen your florist as the one to do their flowers. It always made your heart soar when anyone chose you to do their floral arrangements.

Your co-worker walked into the back where you were carefully working on the bouquets, handing you the flowers you’d requested. You thanked her, placing them down on the table. You only had a few more tweaks and flowers to add and it’d be perfect. It took another five minutes and then you were tying the ribbon on it, packaging it ready to be sent off for the customers' big day. The bell on the front door rang out through the shop alerting you to a new customer.

“I’ll be out in a minute,” you called out, wiping your hands on the apron you wore around your waist.

As you stepped outside into the main floor of the shop, you halted in your step, momentarily stunned. Looking at some of the roses laid out was one of the most handsome men you’d ever laid your eyes on. Truly, he was breathtaking. His dark brown eyes, his perfectly styled hair, the way he carried himself with such confidence — he was one of a kind, you could already tell. You shook yourself out of your stupor, approaching him. God, he even smelled amazing, too. Was he taken completely out of some romantic novel? He seemed like the man authors wrote about in their cheesy rom-com novels (which you absolutely adored).

“Hello, welcome to Petals and Vines. How can I help you?” You greeted him cheerfully. He turned to face you, greeting you with a smile that almost knocked you off your feet. Wow.

“This place is amazing,” he said, his voice laced with awe. “Never really been to many flower shops but this place seems like something out of a fairytale. Are you the owner?”

“Yeah,” you said. “Built it from the ground up. It’s kind of my baby.”

“Well, you should be proud of it.”

“Thank you.”

As you took a closer look at him, trying to keep your cheeks from flushing, you noticed there was something oddly familiar about him. His voice felt like one you’d heard before. You tilted your head to the side, not noticeable but just enough to get a better look at him then it hit you. This was Choi Seunghyun — T.O.P from BigBang. Anyone who was anyone knew that group in Korea. They were the country's pride and joy, one of the biggest bands to come from this side of the world. Heck, you often played their songs on the radio in the shop. Hopefully they weren’t playing right now — that would only be slightly embarrassing.

“So, hey, what flowers would be good to apologise for someone?” He asked, knocking you from your thoughts.

“That depends. What did you do? Who are they for?” You asked.

He smiled sheepishly, rubbing his neck like a nervous habit. “Well, uh… me and my girlfriend got into a bit of a fight last night because I stayed out a little longer than I said I’d be and didn’t tell her so… she wasn’t too happy with me. You know how it is so… I want to say sorry. Let her know I appreciate her, you know.”

Of course he had a girlfriend. Why wouldn’t he? With a face like that and being one of the biggest stars this side of Korea, everyone would be lining up to date him. Not that you were interested anyway. You didn’t know him. He had just taken you off guard. Dating was the last thing on your mind right now. Besides, you were too busy with the store to even consider anything like that. From now on, this place always came first. It had to.

“Hmm,” you tapped your chin in thought. “Pink roses would do the trick, I think. Roses have many different meanings based on the colours and pink signifies affection and care which would be perfect for an apology.”

“You’re the expert, I trust you.”

Why did those few simple words make your stomach buzz with butterflies? Had it really been so long since someone had said those words to you?

“How many would you like?” You asked, manoeuvring around him to the area where the roses were kept.

“A dozen? Make a whole bouquet of them.”

So, you did. You grabbed a bunch of the pink roses, leading him towards the counter where you worked your magic. You cut the stems, making sure they were all lined up perfectly, wrapping them up in some of the fancy paper, tying it with a ribbon. Handing it over to him, you smiled. “There you go. That should do the trick.”

“You’re a lifesaver,” he let out a breath of relief, handing over the cash. “Thanks for your help. Hopefully you won’t have to see me again.”

Well, that was a bummer. You wouldn’t mind seeing him a lot more but you understood. Some customers were regulars, some were like Seunghyun, only popping in for a bouquet for a special occasion or to make up with their partner. You saw it often. Flowers were the perfect gift for any situation. Once he’d left the store, you couldn’t help but think about him for the rest of the day. Would his girlfriend like the bouquet? Would they make up or would he be back here tomorrow asking for another bunch?

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

It had been a particularly hard night. Nightmares plaguing your sleep resulting in barely three hours of shut eye. It was like that sometimes these days. Grief showed up in your sleep, not only in your waking hours. Dreams of your father, of everything that had happened plagued even what was supposed to be your most peaceful moments. Grief walked with you every single step of every single day. As time passed, it got a little easier but you would never fully heal.

You were on your third cup of coffee, leaning against the counter, sipping it as you waited for a customer to enter. Some days the store was busy, some it was slow — that was just how it went. Today, thankfully, was a slow day. Maybe the world was giving you a bit of a break for once. You were thankful for it. Your mood wasn’t the greatest today. It was one of those days where you’d rather be in bed binging some awful TV show to take your mind off everything.

Just as you were about to head to the back to grab yourself another coffee in hopes of perking yourself up, the bell rang out. Instantly, you looked up and were shocked to find Seunghyun heading your way with the brightest smile on your face. It was contagious, you couldn’t help but smile back despite the awful mood you were in.

“Well, look who it is! Didn’t think I’d be seeing you here again,” you teased, standing up straight.

“I had to come and thank you in person. Those flowers did the trick. Everything is okay, she loved them,” he pulled out some money from his pocket, sliding it over to you. “Wanted to give you a tip.”

“I’m glad everything worked out,” you said, genuinely glad you could help him. “But, you don’t need to do that.”

“No, no, I do. If it wasn’t for you, I’d still be figuring out how to make things right. You truly are a lifesaver.”

“Just doing my job.”

“You’re very good at it.”

That made your cheeks heat up. “Thank you, Seunghyun.”

He tilted his head, a teasing smile on his face. “I never told you my name.”

“…Oh, sorry! I recognised you and…” you spoke quickly, embarrassed.

“I’m just joking with you! It’s all good. But, I didn’t catch your name,” he raised a brow expectantly.

This man had come all the way back to the store just to thank you in person, the least you could do was tell him your name. He seemed genuinely grateful, not many customers would come back just to do that. “I’m Y/N.”

“Y/N,” he said, trying the name out on his tongue. “I’ll remember that.”

With a wink, he turned on his heel and left, making sure to thank you once again. Little did he know he’d left you a flustered mess and lifted your mood for the rest of the day.

The first photo was one of Y/N and Jiyong. Ji had his arm around her shoulder as they sat in a booth, his smile cheeky as he poked Y/N’s cheek with his index finger. Y/N was staring straight at the camera, expression deadpan as she rested her chin on her palm, elbow braced on the table in front of them. She looked painfully done with him, but the sparkle in her eye said otherwise. She’d always been soft for Ji’s chaos.

Next was a photo with Taeyang; the duo were bent at the waist as they reached their arms over themselves. Together they completed a heart, both mid laugh. And Hyorin’s face popping up between them, cheeks puffed out, made the shot even sweeter.

Then there was Daesung’s photo, which oozed pure wholesomeness. Y/N clung to his back as Dae laughed, his eyes squeezed shut. Her hair flowed behind her from the spin he’d just stopped when Seunghyun snapped the picture. She looked gorgeous in that moment, carefree and happy.

And then there was the last one: Seunghyun’s. The only one that mattered, really. It was a slightly blurry shot with Y/N standing in front of Seunghyun, her back facing the camera and her arms wrapped around his waist. She had turned back to face the lens, her smile warm and happy. Seunghyun had an arm wrapped around her waist, his other hand almost obscuring his face as he pointed at the camera in mock disapproval. The picture itself was black and white, the brightness edited just enough to obscure the lipstick stain that was smudged on the corners of Seunghyun’s lips and cheek. He zoomed in on Y/N’s face, pretending it was for “photo quality” and not because he was hopelessly weak for that smile. Seunghyun’s own smile deepened as he read her caption at the bottom of the post:

me & my boys. this is 29 ✨

Each photo filled the idol with special memories of Y/N and her growth over the last year. Seunghyun was utterly in love with his girlfriend. He loved how comfortable she was with each member of the group, how she was able to be everyone’s best friend and confidant. But most importantly, he loved how loved Y/N was by their fans and friends. Comments from mutual friends littered Y/N’s post, wishing her happy birthday. And fans had nothing but sweet things to say about the social media guru, sending well wishes.

However, as always, the comments eventually swerved straight off a cliff. Shipping theories, bold accusations and a plethora of creative delusions.

Seunghyun didn’t usually let them get to him. Most of the theories were so wild they bordered on performance art. None of the guys nor Y/N denied any of the rumors; Seunghyun and Y/N wanted to keep their relationship to themselves for as long as they could. But they also didn’t really hide their interactions. They often held hands in public and gravitated toward each during events. But seeing as they were like that since his debut, people either got used to it or chose to over look it. But then there were the rabid fans who read into every glance, every touch, overanalyzing everything.

He gave the post a like. A neutral, diplomatic, “boyfriend-in-disguise” response before deciding to comment with two cake emojis. He then scrolled down the app and came across another birthday post. It was Taeyang’s and it was a two photo carousel. The first photo was from earlier this month, a group photo on stage from before their show in Las Vegas. Taeyang and Y/N were next to each other, each smiling excitedly. The next photo was from over 10 years ago. Y/N was clad in one of Seunghyun’s hoodies, hood up as she stood next to Taeyang who wore his beanie and still had his eyebrow piercing in. The two were posing with peace signs, making silly faces. The caption was short and simple: Happy Birthday Noona.

Seunghyun smiled to himself as he liked the post and continued to scroll. CL had posted a cute collage of all the times she and Y/N had met up over the last year, as well as a couple of throwbacks.

Seunghyun then spotted the same picture Y/N had posted of her and Jiyong on his feed again, this time slightly different and under Ji’s public account. In this picture, instead of the deadpan expression, Y/N was laughing, eyes closed as Jiyong’s own goofy face matched her energy. The next photo in the post was one of Y/N’s hand over Jiyong’s (his smiley face tattoo obvious). Y/N manicured middle finger with her own recognizable heart tattoo was laying over Jiyong’s knuckles, a ridiculous photo taken by Y/N after Ji had teased her over her getting that tattoo a few weeks prior.

Seunghyun wasn’t going to interact with anything more than a like, until he saw the caption.

xxxibgdragon: me & my….

happy birthday 🤍

And the comment section was going insane.

OMG IS THIS THEIR OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT?!

Look at the hand placement. They’re CRAZY for that one 🥵🥵🥵

I KNEW it, they’re totally fucking (that comment made Seunghyun grimace, but he chose to ignore it).

Y’all I’m pretty sure she’s dating Daesung…

Congrats to them, they’re so cute! She’s SO lucky!

Seunghyun’s eye twitched. He was absolutely not a fan of where the comments were headed; territorial wasn’t his usual style, but apparently today was special. He decided to comment on the picture to help set things straight.

He typed a single word.

Brutal, efficient, effective.

ttt: SISTER

Let them interpret that.

(Jiyong cackled to himself when he received that particular notification).

Seunghyun decided it was time for him to post as well, and began to dig through his camera roll. Fifteen years of photos, and somehow none felt good enough. He cursed himself for not being the type who took more pictures, and for always blinking in the ones she took of him.

The one he finally chose was simple. A picture where Y/N was in comfy sweats, seated across from him at their favorite diner, her chin resting on both of her palms as she smiled brightly at him. There was a plate of fried chicken in front of her and it was obvious she was excited over her meal. Y/N wore a “Birthday Princess” crown on her head and Seunghyun thought back on the memory fondly. The picture was silly, but she looked beautiful. Seunghyun quickly typed up the perfect caption to go along with it before posting it for the world.

ttt: you.

happy birthday princess 🍗🐤🐓

He debated adding more. Something sweet. Something obvious. But he decided that “you” said everything anyway.

Seunghyun considered disabling the comments; not because he cared, but because he didn’t need to watch strangers fight for custody of his girlfriend. But before he could do anything, he received a phone call that caused him to post prematurely. By the time he was done, the post had received well over 100k likes and about 11.2k comments, including some from a few familiar usernames.

xxxibgdragon: cheeeeesy 🤢

y/n: 🥰😘💜

leesoohyuk: delicious (re: the chicken 😇)

——-A few hours later——-

To: My Baby 
“you” huh? 🥰

From: My Baby
Was it too much?

To: My Baby
no, it was perfect

To: My Baby

But I can’t believe you posted the chicken picture 😭

From: My Baby
You looked happy looking at the chicken 🤷🏻‍♂️

To: My Baby
I was looking at you, dummy

From: My Baby

Love you too angel

From: My Baby 
I’ll see you tonight xx

———————————————

Y/N spotted Seunghyun outside the restaurant before he noticed her. She spent her birthday meeting new clients and organizing her next big move. With the MADE world tour underway, she wanted to make sure she had all her ducks in a row before traveling with the guys.

Seunghyun was leaning against wall, cigarette in hand as he scrolled on his phone. He looked perfect in that beautiful and quiet way that only he could pull off.

When he finally looked up, he smiled wide.

“Hi,” she said, breathless from the brisk walk across the street (and maybe a little from him).

“My birthday girl,” he murmured, stepping forward to pull her into his chest. He smelled like cedar and something warm, very distinctively Seunghyun. His chin rested on her hair. “Happy birthday.”

Y/N squeezed him tighter.

“Thank you baby. You still didn’t have to post that picture, you know.” She teased again, giggling into him happily.

He laughed softly brushing a quick kiss to her temple as he swayed them back and forth.

“Of course I did.”

“Remind me why again?”

He pulled back just enough to look at her, discarding the cigarette and moving to brush his thumb against her cheek.

“Like I said before, it’s because you looked happy,” he said simply. “And because I wanted everyone to know who I’m celebrating today.”

Y/N’s heart melted as she smiled.

“Have you always been this cheesy?”

“You love it.”

“I love YOU,” Y/N countered proudly, leaning up to kiss his lips softly.

Seunghyun sighed against her, content. He pulled back after a second, turning to guide her inside the restaurant.

“Come on, everyone’s here,” he said excitedly.

“They’re all waiting to embarrass you.”

Taglist: @berfgrimm @ldydeath @wcnderlnds @ttturnitup @loveesiren @petersasteria @pinkpunkdynamite @sherrayyyyy @jackielouuu @breakmeoff @seungttttop @thanosspills @szonyix6277 @pepsicolapussi @raynamorono23 @bettelaboure @crvshedpetals

“Can I help you?” A nurse looked up from her spot, checking your vitals and Jiyong nodded. 

“I’m her husband.” His voice sounded far away and he cleared his throat as entered the room. “Jiyong.” 

“Ah. The doctor should be here soon. But I’ll let him know you arrived.” Jiyong nodded, taking a seat next to your bed. His hand instantly moved to grab yours. 

“Has she woken up yet?” The nurse shook her head before moving to the door. 

“I’m sorry.” She sighed before leaving the room, the door closing behind her. 

Jiyong held it together for a total of 30 seconds before the tears fell. He’d allowed himself the luxury of falling apart on the plane, his friends trying to reassure him as he ran through every possible outcome in his head. He had told himself he wouldn’t cry in front of you though, he had to be strong. Seeing you like this? Hooked up to machines, casts and bandages covering parts of your body? He couldn’t keep it together even if he tried. 

“She’s going to pull through, bro.” Seunghyun’s voice filled the space between empty and Jiyong’s sniffles. 

“You don’t know that. You didn’t hear what they said.” Jiyong clutched his phone tighter, as if this was all he had left of you. 

“She’s a fighter. She’ll be okay.” Youngbae squeezed Jiyong’s shoulder, his eyes looking to the unlocked phone screen. “Don’t write her off as gone, not yet. She’s got the best surgeons working on her.”  

Jiyong nodded. For a guy who always had the right words, nothing was coming to mind right now. The phone call kept playing in a loop in his mind as he looked down at the picture of the two of you on his phone. 

“I’m coming baby, just hang on.” He whispered, Youngbae’s grip on his shoulder tightened as he leaned his head against the window. 

They didn’t have to come, he’d told them to stay. Daesung had been the one to roll his eyes, to remind Jiyong they were your family too. There was no reality where they were finishing this music video while you were in a hospital bed. He’d never been more grateful for his three brothers than he was right now. 

He moved his hand to cradle your face, letting out a sigh as he leaned in to kiss your cheek. “I’m right here, Jagiya. I’m right here.” 

The doctor came in a few minutes later, explaining all the injuries, what all the surgery had entailed, how you’d flatlined but they were able to get you back. Jiyong paled, his eyes going from the doctor to you. 

“She hit her head pretty badly, Mr. Kown. We were able to stop the bleeding in her brain, but until she wakes up we won’t know what damage has been caused.” Jiyong blinked a small nod following. “The nurses will be back in a few to check her vitals. She’s stable, and once we wake her up we can determine the extent of any brain injuries, she should be good to go home.” The doctor nodded before heading out of the room. 

He sat with it for a minute, trying to keep himself composed as he sent the text update to the guys and to Soohyuk. He’d called him from the airport, your mutual best friend, who had thankfully been in Seoul at the time. He’d rushed to the hospital so you weren’t alone during your surgery, waiting in the Surgical waiting room before Jiyong had gotten there

He wasn’t technically allowed in the ICU room since he wasn’t family, but he’d wait for you to wake up for as long as it took. This way at least Jiyong had someone else there for him too, if he ever needed a break. 

A soft knock at the door broke Jiyong from his thoughts and he turned his gaze from you to the door, expecting a nurse. Tears pooling in his eyes when your parents were on the other side. They’d been on vacation when you’d called them and he wasn’t sure how they’d gotten here so fast. 

Something about seeing your mom had him in tears. He stood up trying to wipe them from his eyes as your mom pulled him into a hug, your dad patting him on the back. 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here. I’m so fucking sorry.” He managed to get out between sobs. 

Your mom shook her head pulling him away to get a good look at him. Your parents loved him right away. Maybe even before you had. Jiyong was a son to them, and even if you were the one in that bed, both of you needed a parent right now. Her face cupped Jiyong’s cheeks, eyes scanning him. 

“None of this is your fault, Jiyong. Y/N is a big girl, she would’ve walked to work regardless and you know that.” Jiyong sighed, relaxing a bit. “Why don’t you go home for a bit, take a shower, check on Iye.” 

“I can’t leave her.” 

“You can. She’s not going to wake up today. And she won’t be alone.” Jiyong nodded. 

“Okay. But I’ll only be gone an hour.” 

He walked over to you and sighed as he leaned down, placing a kiss to your forehead. “I love you so much, baby. So fucking much.” 

Your dad had taken his spot in the chair by your bed, his hand holding yours. Jiyong gave his shoulder a squeeze and your mom a final hug before walking out of the room. The doors sliding shut behind him. 

He stood for a minute, hands in his pockets as he watched your parents watch over you. No parent should ever have to feel this pain. If you weren’t going to pull through for him, at least do it for them. He made his way to the ICU waiting room, surprised to find Soohyuk, Youngbae, Seunghyun, and Daesung still waiting. 

“You should all go home.” He looked pointedly towards his members, “It’s been a long day and you could all use some rest. I’ll call you if anything changes.” 

Daesung went to protest but Seunghyun simply shook his head, locked his arm with the younger man’s and drug him from the room. Jiyong sighed, the final wall he had up gone as he sunk into a chair. 

“You should follow your own advance.” Youngbae moved to sit next to him. 

“I am. I told her parents I’d be gone for an hour. I just need to shower and grab some of our things.” He leaned on the chair, his head in his hand. “I just need a minute.” 

“Then we’ll wait too.” Soohyuk decided, taking his place in the other open seat. 

Jiyong looked between his two best friends, a small smile of gratitude on his face. He didn’t need to say it, they knew and they had him. The three men sat in silence for what felt like ages (it had only been five minutes) before Youngbae stood up. Jiyong took that as his queue and stood, following his friends out of the hospital. 

The next few days Jiyong felt like he was on autopilot. Wake up, shower, watch you, eat, sleep, repeat. They’d lowered your medications, allowing you to slip naturally out of the medically induced coma you’d been in. They still weren’t sure when or if you’d wake up on your own. 

The waiting game was torture. Jiyong never left your side. The four walls inside that room had become his home. He was pretty sure he’d counted each ceiling tile a hundred times, knew every crack in the floor, and had nurses' footsteps memorized. You needed to wake up. 

He was holding your hand when it happened. Your parents had said bye and stepped out to grab some lunch when your finger moved in his hand. Jiyong watched in disbelief as it happened again. 

“That’s it, baby. Wake up. Move your hand again.” You did, your fingers squeezing his hand and he cried out in relief. His lips on your forehead, tears running down his cheeks as your eyes met his. Those gorgeous eyes he never thought he’d see again. 

“Jiyong?” It came out in a whisper but Jiyong just held you closer. 

“I’m right here, Jagiya. I’m right here.” His lips brushing your forehead with each word.

You pulled back, a wave of confusion washing over you. Why was Jiyong kissing you? Why was he crying? You looked around the room, the monitor picking up the spike in your blood pressure as your heart raced. Why were you in the hospital? And why did your head hurt so fucking bad? You went to move your dominant arm to find it heavy. You looked down at the cast, eyes wide.

“What the fuck happened?” 

“There was an accident.” Your eyes shot to Jiyong, the confusion still on your face. “You got hit by a car. It was bad, really bad.” Jiyong felt around for the nurse call button. They needed to know why you were up. 

“Yes Mr.-“ The nurse eyed you, a wide grin on her face. “You’re awake!” 

“She doesn’t remember the accident.” The nurse nodded, looking between you and Jiyong. Why was he speaking on your behalf? Who did this guy think he was? 

“That’s normal after an accident like this. I’m sure it’ll all come back soon.” She walked over to you, checking your vitals. “How are you feeling?” 

“Like I got hit by a car.” Jiyong let out a baffled laugh, at least your humor was still intact. That was a good sign. Your eyes wandered over to him. “What are you doing here?” 

“I came home as soon as they called, Jagiya. I wasn’t going to stay at work, not for this.” Your eyes slanted in confusion. 

“What?” Jiyong blinked. 

“Did you not want me to come?” 

“I just don’t know why you would? I hardly know you.” The nurse looked between you both, realization hitting the nurse and Jiyong like a ton of bricks. 

“Y/N. What year is it?” The nurse asked.

“It’s 2012.” You said matter of factly. “I just met Jiyong at a party like two weeks ago.” 

“It’s 2015.” The nurse paused, looking at Jiyong. 

“I’m your husband.” You let out a laugh, regretting it as your left hand shot up to your forehead. 

“Funny. Where’s Soohyuk? Did he put you up to this? I know he wanted us to meet, but come on. We had nothing in common.” 

“I think we had plenty in common…” Jiyong shook his head. That was not the point of this conversation. “Look.” He gestured towards your left hand, holding his up as well. 

You looked between your hands, studying Jiyong’s face for a minute and swallowed. You may not know him well, but you had gathered from that conversation he wasn’t one to look this heartbroken unless it was warranted. Your eyes shot back down to the ring. It was gorgeous, your dream ring and you felt a pang of sadness that you couldn’t remember it. 

You also couldn’t imagine any kind of life with Jiyong. You’d had the biggest crush on Soohyuk for as long as you could remember and now you were just supposed to believe that one night and a couple casual texts had changed that? Jiyong was cute, sure, but he wasn’t Soohyuk. 

“Where’s Soohyuk?” You paused. “Or my parents?”

“Your parents went to lunch, Soohyuk is working.”  

Jiyong was going to be sick. You were back and for that he was grateful but three years of memories were just gone? You didn’t remember him, not really. Every aspect of your relationship was gone from your mind. You were looking at him like he was a stranger. His phone buzzed, his screen lighting up and you both looked down at the wedding photo. He snorted, what he wouldn’t give to have you look at him like that again. 

“Your parents are on their way back.” You hadn’t even seen him text them. 

“And Soohyuk?” Jiyong shrugged.

“Family only allowed in the ICU.” You groaned, leaning back on the bed. 

The nurse made a beeline for the door, promising a doctor would be back soon. Jiyong leaned back in the chair, completely at a loss for what he was even supposed to do. He’d sent a group text to the guys but hadn’t filled them in on your full state. 

She doesn’t fucking remember me. 

What? 

She knows who I am but she thinks we just met two weeks ago. 

I’m sorry, Hyung. I’m sure it’s just a side effect of being out for so long. 

Yeah. Or she’ll never remember me again and my life is fucking over. 

Don’t be so dramatic, Jiyong. This is y/n. She’s crazy about you. 

Yeah, okay. Then why is she only asking about Soohyuk? 

….

Exactly. 

When the doctor came back to the room, everything was a blur of tests and updates and you weren’t sure you’d ever keep any of it straight. You’d noticed Jiyong taking notes out of the corner of your eye and that confusion you felt towards him was overwhelming. He really seemed to care about you, it was all too much. 

Your parents had come at some point, confirming this wasn’t a joke and you’d been baffled by how much they seemed to light up around his presence. It wasn’t that they didn’t like Soohyuk, of course they did. He was your best friend, after all. But this? This was different, something you’d never seen before. 

When the doctor asked about home care and releasing you, you’d just assumed you’d be going home with your parents. Surely they could understand and sympathize with your lack of memories but both them and the doctor had been adamant on you going home with Jiyong. A stranger. Something about getting back to your normal routine could help trigger memories. 

Jiyong packed up your things quietly, your parents hovering just outside the door and you sat helplessly, waiting. You’d managed to get into your normal clothes, Jiyong helping you with your shirt, his eyes closed per you request. 

“You ready?” You blinked looking at Jiyong and shrugged. 

“I guess.” He smirked, it faltered quickly. Like he’d forgotten for a second that you weren’t you anymore and then remembered. 

The ride home was silent, the only noise was Jaeho’s humming as he drove. Apparently you knew him pretty well, too. He’d been Jiyong’s security guard this whole time. You caught the expression on his face when he’d looked to Jiyong after you introduced yourself. Apparently you were just here to bring down the mood for everyone, awesome. 

Walking into the penthouse was surreal. Your things, things that you remembered owning, greeting you as you walked in. So at least Jiyong wasn’t a total monster and you’d somehow managed to bring pieces of you into this relationship. 

Photos of the two of you lined the walls, the bookshelves in the living room it was all too much. You sat down on the couch, suddenly feeling very dizzy. 

“Jagi - Y/N. Are you okay?” Jiyong was by your side, because of course he was. 

“It’s just a little overwhelming. I think I’d like to lay down.” You moved to get comfortable on the couch and Jiyong shook his head.

“You’re not sleeping out here. Let me show you to our room.” You froze, Jiyong gave you a small smile, standing up. “I won’t sleep in there. I can take the guest room, but you need proper rest in a proper bed.” 

Once you’d agreed, he led you to the master suite, and you froze in the doorway. The windows overlooking Seoul nearly took your breath away, but what caught you by surprise was the cat lounging on the bed. 

“And who are you?” You asked as you made your way over to him. 

“That’s Iye.” Jiyong swallowed the lump in his throat.

Iye was his cat but the first time you’d ever stepped foot in his apartment, Iye had become your cat. It seemed like Iye had lost you too. Jiyong wasn’t sure how much more of this he could take. He wasn’t strong enough for this. 

“Hi Iye.” You cooed as you sat down on the bed to pet him. 

The bed was probably the most comfortable bed you’d ever sat on. You made quick work of getting comfy, as best you could with one arm and Iye took up residence at your side. 

“Here’s your phone.” Jiyong stuttered, placing the phone within your reach. “Call me or whatever if you need anything. I’ll let you rest.” He needed to get out of here before he did something crazy like break down in front of you. 

You nodded, watching as Jiyong left the room. You unlocked your phone, thankful your password was still the same after all these years and went to your messages. You hovered over Jiyong’s name, now would be the perfect time to look through your history, while you were alone. Instead, you moved to Soohyuk’s name. 

Hi. 

Y/N! Finally! How are you feeling? 

You couldn’t help but smile at his immediate response, the butterflies you’d grown familiar too over the years, ever present in your stomach. 

Tired. Confused. Jiyong?? 

Your husband, my best friend. Familiar with the concept of him, yeah. 

So this isn’t some sick joke? 

No. You should get some rest. 

Yeah. 

You put your phone down, not at all tired and moved to face the ceiling. Iye curled in closer to you and you couldn’t help but smile a bit. You brought your left hand into view, studying the ring on your finger. You had so much to figure out.

WIND WHIPS AROUND YOUR HAIR AS YOU LEAN ON THE BALCONY RAILING. with it carries the bustling noise of new york’s night life: drunk pedestrians, cars honking, and if you really strain enough – you can just catch a distant ‘thwip’ on the horizon. a smile graces your lips at the recognition. 

you pull out your phone, bright screen still open on the last text yunho sent: be there in 5. it’s been much longer than just a mere five minutes, but you know to take his ETA estimates with a grain of salt. he can get so easily caught up, your boyfriend. especially on a chaotic friday night in the heart of the big apple. 

you sigh, breath turning to fog in the cold air. in the thin cotton of your pyjamas, all that’s really keeping you warm out here is the buzzing under your skin – the excitement of your boyfriend finally coming home. 

these days, he’s been crawling into bed beside you at ridiculous o’clock, cuddling into your snoring body. and by the morning, you wake up to his side of the bed cold, a love note stuck to your phone and some breakfast kept warm on the stove. it’s been too long since he’s just held you – not just a hug goodbye, but a hold that swallows you into his arms until your bodies are tangled as one. a touch that crawls up, that blooms inside you.. 

you flinch when your vision is suddenly cloaked in black – gloved hands cupping over your eyes from behind. your initial surprise quickly slides back into excitement, and you can’t help yourself from reaching up and hooking your fingers around his pinky. 

“guess who?” comes a muffled voice from behind you. even under the mask, you can hear the giddy grin on his face.

you giggle, deciding to play into it. “spiderman?” you faux-gasp, “but i didn’t call for any help..”

he hums, palms sliding down your cheeks, fingers splaying across your chin and neck. you sigh into the touch, head leaning back and bumping into his forearms. that’s when you realise the angle – this show-off is hanging upside down. 

“well, i didn’t come because of any danger, miss..” he says lowly, tilting your head back to stare at him. he inches further down on the string, mask hovering at level with your face. you can hear the way his breaths turn heavy, no doubt his eyes taking in your body. you’re proven right when his hands creep further down, just resting above your chest – fingers twitching over the dainty straps of your pyjama top. your lip quirks over how well you know him. he’s like a dog to a bone. 

“but– my boyfriend’s coming home soon,” you bat your lashes at him, fully committed to the bit. 

he chuckles, removing a hand from your chest to reach for his mask, pulling it up over his mouth. he licks his lips, smirking. “i’ll keep it quick then. he won’t have to know.” 

then he kisses you, soft and hot, inhaling sharply like your mouth is the air he breathes. you kiss him back harder, a noise slipping from your throat in desperation, and it only serves to spur him on. his mouth moves in a hurry against yours, tongue tasting every corner of your mouth. your nose nudges his chin from the angle. 

gloved hands run down your body; one stopping to grope a breast, the other reaching for a handful of your ass. you lean in, instinctually chasing the feel of his body pressed against yours in a kiss, yet finding nothing but the thin air from how he’s hovering above you. you whine from the unfairness – and you feel the way his lip curls into the kiss over the noise. 

“you’re so cute,” he coos as he comes to hold your chin, a stark contrast to the way his fingers pinch your nipple. you squeak, which he quickly smothers with his mouth on yours, fingers continuing to rub at the bud until it perks through the fabric. 

he pulls himself further down on the string, mouth mapping a path down your jaw and neck. nipping with his teeth and soothing with his tongue, eliciting little gasps from you into the night. he kisses all the way down to your chest, pulling your top down enough to free your tits – his mouth latching onto a nipple. you whimper, putty in his hands from how long you’ve been waiting to have your boyfriend like this. 

“please..” you whine, hands trying desperately to grab at the muscles in his back as he leaves a path of lovebites from one nipple to the next. he hums, listening but not stopping. “please, yu–”

you gasp as you hear a snapping sound from above you. you blink, and you’re being pushed into the balcony railing, your boyfriend standing before you – mask off, face flushed, eyes wild. you don’t get to take in the sight of his pretty face you’ve been missing like hell for long, before he’s crashing his mouth back onto yours. the kiss feels even more impatient than the last, and the groan that leaves him is like a spotlight on the bulge pressing into your thigh. 

“let’s take this inside–” you plead through the kisses, about two seconds away from ripping his damn suit off and jumping his bones. 

“got no time, baby,” he mutters as he licks into your mouth. a thought forms, and he chuckles. “what about your boyfriend?” 

you roll your eyes at his sass, rocking your hips forward just to watch the way his face crumples as you rub up against his boner. you repeat the action, drawing out the rolls of your pelvis, feeling your panties grow damper as they rub up and down his clothed length. yunho’s heaving at this point – he always loses it over a bit of grinding – before he’s stopping your hips, biceps tensed from the force. 

“baby..” he exhales, smiling in disbelief but also in pain of not being able to take you the way he so desperately wants to right now. “i still gotta get back out there. i’ll ruin the suit–”

intent on convincing him otherwise, you wedge a hand between your bodies to just grip him through the material. he keels over, face falling onto your shoulder. 

he groans, dick pulsing in your fingers. “you’ll get me fired one of these days.”

“fired?” you snort. “since when do you have a boss?”

yunho bucks his hips into your palm, sighing onto your neck. “since you.”

you crane your neck to kiss him at that – revelling in how he’s unrestrained with all the noises spilling out into your mouth. you remove your hand, and he’s quicker to press his heat back up against yours, both of you sighing in tandem from the relief. 

you stay like that for a while, getting lost in the warmth of each other’s mouths, in the pressure of his clothed cock rubbing into the damp ridges of your panties. your grips on each other’s bodies turning increasingly rough, moans increasingly eager. 

“take the night off?” you plea, guiding one of his hands to your breast for some extra convincing. you stifle a giggle at how he gets immediately hypnotised, kneading the flesh between his gloved fingers. 

he smiles at you, all dopey and in love. “you’re the boss.” 

After watching you mope around for the past two weeks, your friends had decided enough was enough and had somehow convinced you that a night out would make you feel better. That was how you’d ended up in Club Pentagon. Before you had met your ex, you had frequented the place a lot. Actually, it was the place where you’d met him. So, being there, was bringing up a lot of memories you didn’t want to face. Maybe you just needed more drinks. So, downing your third drink finally, you made your way over to the bar. It wasn’t as crowded as you’d expected – maybe you’d just gotten lucky. But as you leaned against the bar, waving your hand to try and get the bartender’s attention, you managed to slip, falling back into someone.

Arms came to wrap around you to hold you up, a snicker of “whoa there” leaving from the person you had so carelessly fallen into. You regained your balance, cheeks heating up in embarrassment as you turned around to thank your saviour. When you did, your words got caught on your tongue. He was gorgeous. Strikingly so. His big brown eyes, purple hair and a smirk on his face that you knew could only mean trouble – how could any person not be knocked off their feet by him? Maybe not literally like you had.

“I’m so sorry,” you bursted out. “I lost my footing.”

“Eh, no worries, Senorita. Not everyday I get a pretty lil thing falling for me like that,” he winked at you. “Name’s Subong. Most people call me Thanos. I’m kind of a big deal.”

“A big deal, huh?” You smiled.

“Rapper, you know,” he shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. “Perform here a lot, working on my album. The real shit.”

“Oh? You’ll have to show me some of your stuff sometime.”

“You bet I will. But, first, let me buy you a drink and you can tell me what you’re doing in this shithole. Ain’t no place for a girl like you.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Two hours later and you’d been sat with Subong, drinking and talking. He had listened to you intently when you told him about your ex and everything that had happened. He had gotten a laugh out of you when he’d threatened to find him and punch him in the face. Turns out, he didn’t have to look very far because, unfortunately for you, your ex was there with some of his friends across the other side of the room.

“That’s the fucker?” Subong glared when you’d pointed him out.

“Yeah,” you sighed heavily. This was the last place you wanted to see him. You had been having such a good time with Subong, too. Your friends had come to check on you but when they saw you were in good hands, they left you to it, closely keeping an eye on you from a distance.

“Seriously, I can go punch that dick right here, right now, if you want.”

“No, it’s okay. Maybe I’ll just go home.”

Subong tilted his head to look at you, a plan formulating in his head. The thing about him was, he wasn’t a good guy but he didn’t want to see you run out of here all because of some other guy. In fact, he wanted the opposite. If truth be told, he was almost definitely trying to get into your pants. “No way, Senorita. Let’s give him a show.”

“What do you mean? What kind of sho-” Your words were cut off when you were grabbed by your hands to your feet and led over to the dancefloor.

“Follow my lead,” Subong whispered into your ear as he stood behind you, planting his hands firmly on your waist. He pulled you back against him so your ass was pressed firmly against his crotch. “He’s watching.”

And, he was. As you casually turned your head in the direction of your ex, you noticed that he was staring right at you. That spurred you on, you began to move your hips, grinding your hips against Subong’s. He leaned into it, using his hands on your hips to guide you, pushing his own harder against you. Leaning forward, he began to whisper in your ear. “You’re good at this.”

“Not my first rodeo,” you laughed, leaning back against him fully now.

“How about ramping things up a little, Senorita?” He tugged at your earlobe while one of his hands slid down your front, dipping beneath the waistband of your skirt.

A gasp left your lips when you felt his fingers slide down the apex of your thighs, brushing against your panties. You had to bite back a moan as he slowly began to rub his fingers against you. The way he expertly moved his fingers against you even through the fabric was driving you crazy. All you could think about was what he could do if that barrier wasn’t in the way. Your panties grew wetter, Subong pressing hot, open mouthed kisses against your neck. It was easy to forget that you were in the middle of the dancefloor, grinding against a man you’d met mere hours ago with his fingers down your skirt.

“Did he ever touch you like this? Make you feel as crazy as I am right now?” Subong whispered in your ear. His fingers pushed your panties to the side, one long finger running along your slit. “You’re fuckin’ drenched, baby. You’re so desperate, aren’t you? Coming to this club acting all innocent and now you’re letting a stranger touch you. Bet you’d let me fuck you, huh?”

With no warning, he slipped a finger inside you, expertly curling it at just the right spot that had you gasping out. He pumped his finger at a rapid pace, grinding his ever hardening cock against your ass. You felt like you could burst. The whole point of this falling to the back of your mind. Who cared about your ex? All you could think about was the man who had his fingers inside you, making you feel better than you had in weeks.

“Tell me you want it and I’ll fuck your ex right out of you,” he whispered hotly in your ear, his fingers still working you.

“Yes,” you managed to breathe out. 

In an instant, he removed his fingers from you, lewdly bringing them to his mouth to taste you. The groan you heard from him almost made your knees buckle. His hand grabbed yours, almost dragging you towards the back. There was brief call out to someone called Namgyu about using the main office for a little. And, before you knew it, you were gently pushed into a room with a desk. There was no time to gather your bearings before you pressed against the desk, Subong’s lips fiercely attacking yours.

You kissed him back with just as much ferocity, hands grabbed at his shirt to pull him in closer. Everything about this man was intoxicating, you couldn’t get enough. Besides, didn’t everyone say a good way to get over someone was to get under them? It was worth a shot. When his lips pulled back from yours, it was breathlessly he spoke. “Bend over the desk, Senorita. Face down, ass up.”

His tone was commanding enough that you obeyed instantly. You pushed aside a few of the things that were scattered on the desk, leaning over it, presenting yourself to him. There was some rustling as you heard him fumble with his jeans then his fingers were hooking in your panties, tugging them down your legs. He flipped your skirt up, giving him a perfect view of your ass and glistening folds. A huff of breath sounded out from him, his cock in his hand as he dragged it through your soaked pussy. “By the time I’m done with you, you won’t even remember that asshole's name.”

Before any words of retort could pass your lips, he pushed his cock into you, bottoming out with a loud groan. Your own moan echoed off the walls of the office. He drew his hips back then slammed back in, setting a deep, hard pace. The room was a cacophony of your ever growing moans and his grunts. His fingers dug hard into your hips, there’d be bruises there tomorrow but you didn’t care.

“Look at you taking my cock so fuckin’ good,” he groaned, bringing on palm down to slap your ass as he pounded into you. “You’re getting close aren’t you, Senorita? Come on, scream for me.”

One of his hands moved to press your head down into the desk, your cheek pressed against the cool wood as he moved faster, determined to bring you both to your peak. Another slap against your ass had you moaning louder than before, babbles of his name and pleas for more spilling from you. You could feel yourself growing closer, your walls squeezing around his cock. Subong could tell too. He pulled his hips all the way out until the tip remained then drove into you with a force that had you seeing stars. Two more thrusts like that and you were crying out his name, your orgasm washing over you.

“Fuuuuck,” he groaned, rutting into you now in sloppy, quick thrusts. “Gonna cum, Senorita. Gonna fill you up, remind you who made you feel this good.”

It was seconds later when he was spilling into you, a long, loud groan coming out of his mouth as he kept his hips flush against you, holding you in place as he came. A few minutes passed before he finally pulled out, tucking himself back away into his pants. He watched as you breathlessly pulled yourself to your feet, putting your own clothes back into place.

“Well… that’s one way to help me, I guess,” you laughed quietly, smoothing out your skirt.

“Anytime, baby. You need more help like that then I’m your guy,” he winked at you, looking at his watch. “Would love to stay and chat but got a show to put on. Call me sometime.”

He left before you could even say anything, leaving you alone in the room. You couldn’t be mad at him. You barely knew the guy. All you could do now was head back out, meet up with your friends and go home. Hopefully avoid seeing your ex because you knew for sure if he had seen you leave with Subong, he’d have something to say.

As you stepped out of the room, you realised one thing.

Subong hadn’t even give you his number.

You hadn’t touched each other in months, which was fine. You loved each other, you didn’t need to have sex to prove anything to each other. Jiyong felt the way you loved him every day when you had food and a hot shower waiting for him. You felt the love in the way he clutched to you at night like you were his life line. 

“You okay?” You looked up, Jiyong’s eyes were watching you from the mirror in his dressing room and you smiled. 

“I should be asking you that.” He shrugged, fixing his mullet one last time before turning to face you. 

“You seemed like you were far away, where did you go?” 

“I was just thinking.” You shrugged. 

“About?” 

“Nothing important.” 

Jiyong raised a brow as he stood up, moving over to the clothing rack. He went on in ten minutes and you could feel yourself getting more worried by the second. The fake ok act was on and wouldn’t come off until you were in the note that night. You knew how this went. You turned your gaze to your phone as he changed. 

Despite everything, you couldn’t help but still find him incredibly attractive. You were trying so hard to be there, to care for him in the way he needed. He didn’t need you acting like the girls over sexualizing him these days. So you looked away, you tried to keep your distance. He was usually so exhausted it made it easy to not have sex. 

Jiyong had noticed, he noticed everything about you. He didn’t push it. There was so much going on he couldn’t afford to be in his head about this. He thought the worst, of course. He figured you were pulling away because you were over him. He didn’t realize the constant turmoil you’d been in for months. 

“Jagiya.” 

“Hmm?” You lifted your gaze, dropping your phone as you saw his outfit. 

“You think this is okay for tonight?” The red outfit was taunting you and you nodded as you made eye contact.

“It’s perfect. You look great.” You smiled at him before standing up. 

You made your way over to him, straightening his hat. He smiled at you, it was almost like looking at the Jiyong you used to know. Your heart ached as you leaned in to plant a small kiss to his lips. His stubble scratched your face and you sighed as you pulled back.  He watched your movements closely as you straightened, your eyes on him before you took a step back. 

“Break a leg.” You smiled. Jiyong smirked, before turning to step out of the room. 

This was going to be a long night. You had been spending months trying not to think of your very hot boyfriend as just that. Not when everything was falling apart around him and he wasn’t taking care of himself. You’d focused all your time and energy into making sure he ate, drank water, got some sleep, woke up after he slept too much. There hadn’t been much time to think about how damn good he looked every time he stepped foot into that persona of G-Dragon. But here he was, in a fully red outfit about to make you come undone. 

You watched from your favorite spot, side stage as he took control of the crowd. Tonight was a special night, a few of his bigbang members and Chaerin were there for some guest spots. It was like the entire world was coming together to protect Jiyong from himself.

He met you after a few songs, the smile on his face gone, exhaustion taking over and you frowned as you grabbed his outstretched hand. This tour was in desperate need of being over. Thankfully, you were back in Korea now and in a few days you could put this whole nightmare behind you. 

Jiyong led you into his dressing room and you swallowed hard when you realized you were alone. You’d been safe all tour, being able to keep your hands to yourself when he wore certain outfits because someone was always around. He always needed more make up or his hair fixed. Where was everyone? 

You dropped his hand, your eyes searching the room for any sign of life, hoping maybe Jaeho would pop up from behind the couch or something. Jiyong's eyes tracked your movements as you put a small amount of distance between you. 

“I’m going to go find you some water.” You nodded, as if that was a convincing reason to leave a room that you knew was fully stocked with everything he needed and then some. 

“Jagi-“ 

Jiyong’s hand gripped your wrist, stopping you from leaving the room and you let out a noise you weren’t even sure was human. Something between desire and panic taking hold of you as your eyes locked with his. 

“What’s going on, Jagiya? Why are you avoiding me?”

“I’m not.” His eyes slanted in annoyance. 

“You have been for months. I’m not an idiot, Jagiya. I know when I’m not wanted anymore.” 

“You think I don’t want you?” You turned to face him fully, your faces inches apart. “I’m going crazy over here because all I want is you. I’ve been putting distance between us because you’ve not been in the headspace for anything other than taking care of yourself. I’m so fucking worried about you and I didn’t want to take advantage of you in this state.” You tried to free your arm from him, put back that distance you’d been so carefully maintaining for months, but his grip on you tightened. “But then you put on this outfit and god, Jiyong. You have no idea what you do to me.” 

Jiyong drew you in closer, and you whimpered, finally allowing all that control to fall away. Jiyong looked at you, something flashed across his eyes at the sound you made and you shivered in anticipation before Jiyong’s mouth met yours. There was nothing sweet or innocent in this kiss. Gone was the polite pecks of encouragement, the good night kisses you’d shared. This was all want, desire, and something else. 

You let Jiyong take from you, all his anger and frustration fading away the longer he kissed you. You weren’t in control anymore and when he finally broke the kiss you felt dizzy from all the conflicting emotions. 

“Let me take care of you.” He mumbled, his hand reaching behind you to lock the door. 

He kissed you again as he sat down in his director chair, pulling you onto him. You almost laughed at the irony, the amount of times you’d thought about fucking him in this very chair. You’d filed it away for when he was better.  Had dreams about it, but right now, as you straddled his lap, you had to admit reality was much better than your dreams. 

Jiyong’s hand moved to rest at your hip, his fingers bunching up the end of your skirt and you hissed as you felt the cool material of his pants hitting the inside of your upper thigh. Your hips moved and you let out a soft moan.

“That’s it, baby. Use me.”  

His hands kept you steady as your hips moved, your body grinding down on his thighs, no doubt leaving a wet mark as you soaked through your panties. Months of putting his mental wellbeing had left you a fucking mess in his lap. It was almost embarrassing how quickly you came, falling apart just by a simple thigh riding. Jiyong’s hand moved to your head, pushing you towards him, kissing you through your orgasm. 

His kiss was rough, biting down on your lip, hard enough you could taste the metallic tang of blood. Jiyong didn’t mind though, he simply licked at your lip, causing you to moan as he kissed you harder, his fingers locking with your hair. 

His free hand pulled your panties to the side before undoing his belt. Tricky to do one handed, considering it attached around his torso but he managed to free himself, his cock springing free through the fly of his pants. 

Your hand wrapped around him, giving him a quick pump before Jiyog lifted your hips slightly. The urgency took over and he lowered you onto him quickly. He didn’t give you a chance to adjust as he moved inside of you. The tip of his cock hitting you just right. You clawed at his chest, suddenly hating this outfit. 

Jiyong smirked at your frustration, his head lowering to your chest, he ripped your top open, buttons flying everywhere and you glared at him before his lips moved to kiss your nipple. You head fell back slightly, you were warm everywhere, head fuzzy from your first orgasm and the sensation of feeling him everywhere. His hand reached up, his finger pushed your chin so that you were looking at him. 

You understood his silent eyes on me command and obeyed, your hips working faster against him. He pulled out of your without warning and you wined at the loss of contact. Jiyong stood up, bending you over the chair and entered you roughly. 

His hand tugged at your hair, pulling your head back so you could look at him. His movements were fast, rough, the only sounds in the room were your moans and the sounds of skin slapping against each other. Anyone walking by could hear you. You didn’t care though. 

“Ji, I’m gonna-“ but you didn’t finish your sentence as the waves of another orgasm took over you. 

Jiyong didn’t slow his pace. He was determined to make you feel good, make sure you knew just how badly he’d wanted you these last few months too. He held you in place as his own orgasm hit, his release hot as it came out in spurts inside of you. 

He pulled out of you and turned around to see the absolute mess you’d made on his pants, a sheepish smile on your face.

“Sorry about the pants.” He shrugged as he discarded them, removing his shirt and throwing it down next. 

You took a second to take him in. He was thin, too thin but you tried not to dwell on it. Not when his x x tattoo was staring at you like that. You blinked, your intrusive thoughts winning as you dropped to your knees. 

“Jagiya?” Your tongue darted out, tracing the letters as your hand moved to wrap around cock. “Jagiya.” He warned, but you didn’t care. He was getting hard again, his cock filling your hand and you licked down his stomach. 

“Let me take care of you.” His eyes rolled back as your lips wrapped around him. 

You took him slowly, moaning at the taste of you on his skin. Time was running out and he surely needed to change, but that didn’t stop you. You took your time, until you could feel him at the back of your throat and Jiyong’s brain caught up to what was happening. 

His fingers wound tightly in your hair, gripping you hard and holding you in place. He held you until you gagged, loosening his grip on you. You moved, your head bopping quickly as your cheeks hallowed. Jiyong sucked in a breath as you licked his tip and you couldn’t help but moan when you felt his cock twitch in your mouth. 

“Fuck, Jagiya. You look so fucking hot with my cock in your mouth.” 

He begin moving with you, hard thrusts into your mouth and you took him like a champ. He was like a man possessed and you were fucking starved. If you could just cancel the rest of the show and do this until morning you’d be happy. You didn’t even care if he broke your jaw at this point. You couldn’t get enough of Kwon Ji-yong no matter how hard you tried. 

He moved against you harder, his tip hitting the back of your throat and you wrapped a hand around him, moving both your mouth and hand along with his movements. You set a quick, fast pace. 

It took only a few more thrusts before you felt his release hit the back of your throat. You swallowed every last drop, releasing his cock from you mouth with a pop before standing up. 

“Fuck, Jagiya.” Jiyong took a second, catching his breath. 

“Still think I don’t want you?” 

He kissed you, gently as an answer to your question and you sighed as you pulled away. He got dressed quietly, handing you a merch shirt to replace what he broke. 

“This isn’t finished.” He gestured between the two of you before making his way to the door, unlocking it and opening it slightly. 

“You’re right, it’s not. We still have things to talk about. But after.” He nodded and slipped out of the room, you followed behind. 

Once he was positioned backstage, you did your best to fix his outfit, making sure it looked ok for the fans. “I love you.”  He smiled at you and you rolled your eyes. 

“I love you too.” 

And you did, love him. More than anything else in the world. You knew after the show he’d go back to avoiding the topic of him, but you also knew it needed to be said, to be taken care of.  You were going to stand by his side until he was the best version of himself again, and you’d stay after that too. Jiyong was your life, you weren’t ever going to be tired of him, no matter what life threw at you. He was yours and you’d make sure he made it through this.

He watched as you danced with a couple of the girls. It was nice to see you having fun, letting go of all the troubles of the week. When the invitation had first shown up, Seunghyun had been adamant on not wanting to go. His cousin was getting married, the whole family would be there and Seunghyun knew that meant endless questions about when he was going to settle down and finally have children. It happened at every family gathering. But, you had come up with the genius plan to pretend you were a couple. It would get everyone off his back and you’d get to attend a wedding. It was a win-win for the both of you.

His eyes narrowed as he saw the smile instantly fall from your face when one of his cousin's friends – who hadn’t left you alone all night despite the fact you were ‘dating’ Seunghyun – strode up to you, placing a hand on your shoulder. That was it. It was time for him to step in. Placing his drink down on the closest table, he walked over to you. The second he was close, his hand rested on your lower back, his lips leaning in to whisper in your ear.

“Need some help?” He asked quietly, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine.

“Yes, please,” you leaned back into him, making a show of it, eyes gazing up into his dark ones.

“Sorry but I need to steal my girl here for a minute,” Seunghyun plastered on a fake smile for the guy, taking your hand in his and leading you away. Once he was happy with the distance, he moved your arms so they were around his neck, his own landing on your waist to dance to the music. It was a soft sway, the song ironically changing to a slow one.

“Thank you,” you sighed a breath of relief, your whole body immediately relaxing. “He hasn’t left me alone all night despite telling him I’ve got a ‘boyfriend’”.

“Well, maybe,” he said, taking your hand in his and twirling you around before bringing you back into him. “We need to put on a bit of a show.”

Before there was even time to react, he had tugged you in closer to him so your chests were pressed against each other, his hands resting dangerously above your ass. There was nobody in the world you trusted more than Seunghyun — you knew he wouldn’t do anything weird. He was the most respectful man you had ever had the privilege of knowing. Really, it was a crime that he was still single. With a face like his, an incredible personality to boot and a respect for women like no other? It was a wonder people weren’t lining up for him. As his forehead rested against yours, it was hard not to lose yourself in the moment. To everyone else, you probably looked like a real couple that were so in love. Maybe there was a little truth to that. Maybe, just maybe, you had realised you really did have feelings for him. They had always been there, threatening to bubble up and all it took was one night pretending to date for them to boil over furiously. The soft smile on his lips, the way his eyes met yours. God, it was like some cheesy romcom.

That was why you couldn’t stop yourself.

The buzz. The butterflies in your stomach. The way he was looking at you.

It was all to much.

Before you knew it, you were tilting your head, leaning in until your lips met his. Seunghyun’s eyes widened momentarily soon enough they fluttered shut, his hands moving up to cup each side of your face. Lips moved together in tandem, Seunghyun tilting your head to get better access to deepen the kiss. It barely lasted a minute before your senses came back to you.

“Oh, shit, I-I’m sorry,” you took a step back, bringing your hand up to your mouth.

“No, no, it’s okay,” Seunghyun tried to reassure you as he stepped closer but you only backed away.

“I’m so sorry,” you choked out, quickly turning and running out of the room. Seunghyun was left standing in the middle of the dance floor, confusion and hurt etched all over his face.

What the hell had just happened?

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Half an hour had passed. Seunghyun had figured you’d need ten minutes or so to get over it then you’d come sauntering back in like nothing had happened. But, you didn’t. He had sat himself down at one of the tables, the first two buttons popped on his shirt to give him more room to breathe. A drink was cradled in his hands, only a few dregs left in it. With a heavy sigh, he got to his feet, heading back towards the bar. As he did, suddenly there was a hand wrapped around his wrist dragging him off into the nearest store cupboard.

“What the fu-“ His mouth was covered by your palm to stop his words.

“Shhh!” You hushed. “He’s been looking for me since…”

Seunghyun, the absolute menace he was, licked your palm causing you to groan out in disgust, pulling it away from his mouth. The room was dimly lit with barely any space to move but he got his eyes on your face. “What? Before you kissed me and then left me in the middle of the dance floor looking like an idiot?”

“I’m sorry,” you said with a sigh. “I freaked out, okay? I was caught up in the moment and… you’re my best friend. I don’t want to ruin that.”

“A kiss doesn’t change anything unless we let it.”

“So… no weirdness?”

“No weirdness,” Seunghyun nodded but deep inside he knew that he wanted to taste you again. He needed to feel your lips on his, hold you against him like he had. He craved it, he craved you. One taste and he was hooked.

“Move out of the way and let me listen to see if the coast is clear,” you brushed past Seunghyun, leaning your ear against the door. All you could hear was the music coming from the hall and the chatter of Seunghyun’s drunk family members. Did you really want to risk it by opening the door to look? You wrapped your hands around the door handle, straightening up but as you did, you felt Seunghyun pressed right against you thanks to the limited closet space. His breath fanned across your neck, your eyes closing on instinct.

It was his turn to be unable to stop himself. His fingers moving your hair away so he could lean down and press his lips against the column of your neck. It was hard not to melt against him. His hand rested on your hip, his body flush against you so you could feel the press of his hard on against your backside.

“Thought we said no weirdness,” you breathed out, tilting your head to look at him.

“Maybe a little bit of weird,” he mumbled against your skin.

He grinded his hard on against you, eliciting a gasp from you as you felt him harden through the fabric of your clothes. His lips were still working their magic on your neck, drawing the most beautiful breathless moans from you.

“You like that, princess?” He teased. His fingers had bunched up the hem of your dress pulling it up higher to expose your panties to him. His fingers drifted around to your front, sliding into the fabric. Immediately, his fingers ran through your soaked folds, a groan tearing from his throat as your juices coated his fingers. Pulling them from you, he brought them up to his lips. “Taste like a fucking dream. Trust me when I say this but one day I’m going to eat that pussy of yours all night long until you’re begging me to stop but for now….” He spun you around in one fell swoop. “Jump.”

Your eyes rolled back at his filthy words. Just the image of that was enough to send a fresh wave of arousal rolling through you. There was no time to waste as you obeyed. You jumped, Seunghyun catching you as you wrapped your legs around his waist, his body pressing you against the door to hold you up.

“If you want me to stop, tell me right now,” he caught your eyes and the sincerity there almost made your heart stop. But, there was no way you wanted to stop. Not when nobody had ever got you this worked up in just a few short minutes. So what if the friendship got ruined; maybe it’d open the doors to something different. A new step in your relationship.

“No,” you shook your head. “Keep going.”

His lips claimed yours in a fierce kiss that stole the breath from your lungs. His tongue easily slipped past your lips, dancing with yours. You heard the zipper of his pants, your eyes moving to watch as he pulled himself free.

“Nuh-uh,” Seunghyun tutted, using his finger to lift your chin up so you met his eyes. “Eyes on me, princess and don’t take them off me for once second.”

Your panties were pushed to the side, Seunghyun’s cock teasingly sliding through your folds. He purposely made sure to catch the head on your clit with each run through making you more and more desperate until you couldn’t take it anymore. “Seunghyun, please!”

With a wicked grin, he finally notched the head of his cock at your entrance and pushed inside. Neither of you were quiet, forgetting entirely where you were — too lost in the feeling of being joined with each other. He gripped your hips, holding you in place as he pulled out then pushed back in hard. Each time he pushed back in, he sped up until he was pounding into you against the door. You tried to chase his hips with yours, loud moans falling from your lips each time his dick hit that special spot inside you.

“Taking my cock so well,” he grunted, resting his forehead against yours. “Such a good girl, huh? Keeping your eyes on me, letting me fuck you right where anyone could find us.” His thumb brushed over your bottom lip before slipping into your mouth. Immediately your tongue swirled around it causing him to moan. He pulled it out, using it to find your clit and rubbing quick, hard circles to the sensitive bud. “Cum for me, baby. Let me feel you.”

It took a matter of seconds before you were a boneless mess in his arms. Your orgasm ripped through you like shockwaves, your walls tightening around his length, his name falling from your lips. He continued to slam into you, grinding his hips against yours in a circular motion with each thrust back in until he lost it. One hard thrust later, he was balls deep inside you, cumming harder than he had in a long time. He bit down onto your shoulder to hide his loud moan, his release filling you up.

All that could be heard was panting as you both caught your breaths back. Seunghyun was the first to speak as he gently pulled out of you with a hiss, settling you back onto your feet. “Not going to run away from me are you?”

“No,” you laughed, cheeks flushed red. You straightened out your clothes, helping Seunghyun do the same with his. “We could run away from here and do that again properly back at your place, though. Then… maybe talk about it. At some point. Maybe after the third round.”

“I like the way you think,” he kissed you one last time before taking a deep breath. “Let’s get you your grand escape.”

With his hand firmly in yours, he pulled the door open to the closet and made a run for it, narrowly missing the guy who hadn’t left you alone all night. Seunghyun made a snarky comment of “just you and your hand again tonight” as they passed him to which your elbowed him playfully in the side.

He laughed, looking at you with those big, brown eyes of his. And, as you met them, you knew that no matter what the future held, as long as you were with him, it would be okay.