all I am is all that I've been through @tryingdoesnthurt - Tumblr Blog

— INTRO — not as active as before

teo / 23 / he/they (ftm) / ita

This is an account trying to document me getting out of this disordered eating thoughts relapse. Warning for triggering content (ED / purging / self-harm / suicidal thoughts, alcohol).

This blog will mostly be: ramblings, vents, pictures of what I bake (and maybe cook), daily logs with pics of what I eat in the day (when I can take them)

I will not post my stats.

Asks are open to chat/ask questions lol, im always happy too interact !

Hope you enjoy your stay! <3

#intro post #ed recovery #ana recovery #pro recovery #— me talking #Spotify #— music

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my mum started randomly talking about my first impatient experience when it all started. got me thinking about why ive been wanting to descending again

#— vent

it's the kinda day where i would just lie on the balcony and chainsmoke

#— me talking #madame is making new songs and that is affecting me too much

i would like my body to be a sketchbook <- guy who is thinking of getting a tattoo

#im scared (of interacting with the tattoo artist)#but it could be cool #maybeeeee #tattoos talk #— me talking

im gonna throw uppppp (not actually)

#anxiety im nauseous #why is socializing so difficult #— me talking

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tryingdoesnthurt

im terrified

tryingdoesnthurt

the rollercoaster of emotions was exhausting but at least it was time to sleep (im better now)

#— me talking

im terrified

fuckvictorvale

life is so much better when you have a work of fiction to obsess over

kosmogrl

aspdist

sorry if I act so weird, I was supposed to die at 14

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quiet-and-unknown2

I hate when those corny mh tips are right, it's so annoying. I went for a short walk, literally only 20 minutes, as I hadn't been outside all day, and my mood instantly improved

#big mood the same thing happened to me too today #im happy you are feeling better tho! ^^#btw if you didnt want this reblogged tell me and i'll take it down!

i miss having fresh burns on my skin

#i miss burning myself FUCK #bad day apparently #— vent #tw sh #tw self harm #tw burns

God says I was born from a rib

but He doesn't know he was born from my fear

if I had been Eve, I would have swallowed the core too

of the apple with all its seed

#song lyrics

rainbun

I finished making a Picrew I've been working on for a while! You can use it to show what's in your bag or your ocs' bags. Please try it out and tag me in your creations!

Knowing what objects are important to someone can tell you about parts of a person's personality, interests, and preferences that may not be

Some examples of what you can make:

lurkinglilyrice

my best friend made this incredible what’s in my bag picrew and I’m finally ready to semi-expose my tumblr (nobody’s here anyways)

Anyways it’s really fun!!! Here is my bag. I’ll also tag some mutuals who might want to check it out as a no pressure reblog chain perhaps (also please feel free to reblog even if you’re not tagged…I just haven’t posted here in a while and I’m too scared to tag people)

@unavoidableconsequence @overwhelmedfernfrond

overwhelmedfernfrond

soooo cute i love this picrew!! how cool for you that you know the person who created it!

here’s mine :D

tags: @quiet-and-unknown2 @endlessnebula @sunflowerrosy @luvlockett @the-ellia-west + open tags!

and i’ll def be coming back myself to make my characters’ bags :)

luvlockett

omg this is so amazing! and adorable!! :) <3

tags: @tryingdoesnthurt @sweetpotatough @offthescalez @problematicpastries

tryingdoesnthurt

thank you @luvlockett and @quiet-and-unknown2 for the tag !!! this was super fun im sorry im late ;-; <33

i have an itabag with Many pins ^^ :D

open tags !! feel free to join if you see this !!!!! :>

#tag game #long post #i love my moots

wholeheartedsuggestions

late night reminder to self: your depressive episode will not last forever. it will have an end. tonight will not be the end of you.

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Anya is LIVE right now

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tryingdoesnthurt

i think i failed. i think it's all my fault and i think it's too late already

tryingdoesnthurt

i think im trying not to see i have lost a friend already. i think i have to convince myself that it's too late so if it is i would have gone through it already and if it isn't i will be relieved it's still here

tryingdoesnthurt

i think ive lost everything and i cling to a lie cause i dont want to see

merry christmas, happy new year

how long has it been since you have texted me?

i dont blame you, i'm not mad, i never was, never will be

i just have to take the blame and put it on me

because im terrified if being angry at you

never wrong, you did nothing wrong

it's just me

it's always just me

tryingdoesnthurt

LIFE UPDATE SHE TEXTED ME TODAY APOLOGIZING AND ASKING HOW I AM !!!! NOTHING IS LOST THERE IS HOPE !!!!!!!

#laughing at the café AAAAA #oh my FUCKING god /pos #im so hapoy #tw caps #— me talking

i-have-passed-through-fire

starting a new thread cuz the first one was really long. thank you so much for the tag @hellequinistic <3

steal something from my room

paperback copy of Godkiller by Hannah Kaner

10mm crochet hook

assorted yarn

small bag full of assorted rosaries

tortilla blanket

headphones

Sevral Timez bumper sticker

pocket sized Hello Kitty photo album

Voting ended onJan 4

no pressure tags: @bluesey-182 @evildarkacademiaarchivist @darkacademiaarchivist @elkteeths @tempered-grace

imnotafraidtodisappear

removed reblogs cos the thread got really long but thanks for the tag @your-fav-idiot-lesbian!

commit thievery

mushroom lamp

rainbow bunting

many rhubarb and custard sweets

dragon jellycat

signed copy of the brothers hawthorne

lego tulips

my entire crystal collection

phoebe bridgers poster

Voting ended onFeb 7

tried to do different things because i feel like i always write the same objects

@waytoomarvelobsessed @a-vial-of-stars @sarkastic1515 @wallyblack1925-offical @foundheaven013 @i-love-my-gays @redwinesupanover @geraniumnecromancer @wolfspidery + whoever else :)

geraniumnecromancer

oooh, thanks for the tag Bea! these are always interesting

hopefully I picked new things this time?

shelf of books on wicca & celtic mythology

she ra themed tarot deck

large brass horse statue

lesbian teddy bears wearing my old baby clothing

book ends that look like a miniature library scene (incl a cat)

highland cow plush

knitted wool blanket (green, brown and white)

Voting ended onFeb 1

Open tags :D

lil-opossum-freak

I don’t have a huge amount of interesting stuff, but I like these so I’m joining in anyways :)

Rob me.

Assorted bones (bird skull and some sheep vertebrae mainly)

heated blanket

Knockoff converse I painted mcr album covers onto

sticker covered 3DS

x2 blahjas

metal dnd dice set with sparkly purple bits

pile of CDs on my desk I’ve been meaning to listen to

Voting ended onFeb 7

Tags!!: @g0thicghost @anonpalmtree @trashgremlendoesart @overwhelmedfernfrond + free tags

overwhelmedfernfrond

ty for the tag @lil-opossum-freak :D

thieve

various lavender-scented cosmetics

small iridescent glass hummingbird sculpture

literary quotes, handwritten on nice paper and taped to the wall

cloned poisonous plants

jinx from arcane poster, hand-drawn by my brother’s partner

books of every conceivable genre

fern-patterned curtains

lily-of-the-valley suncatcher

basket of crochet supplies, including two amateurly-crocheted plushies

Voting ended onFeb 7

tags: @write-with-will @omnipotentnothing @endlessnebula @sunflowerrosy @the-ellia-west @luvlockett @sunvili + open tags :)

luvlockett

Thank you for the tag! This one’s so creative!! <3

steal from my room

my old ice skates

my bookshelf (mostly fiction books and knickknacks I’ve acquired)

my collection of the original American Girl Doll illustrated books

a variety of floral dresses (most being black, kinda Stevie Nicks esque)

my CD player

my seal plush

Voting ended onFeb 2

@tryingdoesnthurt @magicwafflemaker @offthescalez @sweetpotatough + open tags

magicwafflemaker

Thank you for the tag, that looks so fun!!

I don't know english that well to form any creative title

My Oscar Wilde's book collection

Bunch of printed photos/fanarts from my fav pieces of media covering my walls

1-1,5 meter lin Manuel miranda hanging on my wall

My cd's collection - mostly my fav rock bands albums or their beast of mix

Board with souvenirs and magnets form places i've been to

Handmade gifts and letters from my friends in random corners of my room

my rocking chair next to bookshelves

Loudly ticking clock with a landscape of Budapest

Silly plushies and Coraline doll

Voting ended onFeb 10

(upadate i've just realised i wrote beast instead of best i'm sorry it will happen again)

@quiet-and-unknown2 @tryingdoesnthurt @sweetpotatough @offthescalez + open tags!!

sweetpotatough

Thanks for the tags!

Steal from my room :)

dragon statue

huge handmade Toothless plush

Strange collection of like 8 protein bars

artbook of Spider-verse ATSV and the wild robot

alpha male wolf shirt

Scottish terrier slippers

David Attenborough documentaries

Satyr hooves for ren faire

Voting ended onFeb 4

Tags! @tryingdoesnthurt @offthescalez @quiet-and-unknown2 @chibi-the-pancake @hardbulimiarecovery @olibear17 +open tags

tryingdoesnthurt

thank you @sweetpotatough @luvlockett and @magicwafflemaker for the tag in this !!! im so sorry it took me this long to do it :(( <3

steal from my room :-)

one of my 30 abstract paintings

beloved blåhaj

pastel glow-in-the-dark blanket

magnetic whiteboard with rocks-like magnets

a keychain from the dabihawks corner

30cm mannequin for poses references

trallallero 3D printed statue

star wars lamp (it's a head that glows)

one (1) carton board with motivational sentences

crochet shrimp with purple sweater and blue hat

Voting ended onFeb 12

tagging ! (no pressure) @chibi-the-pancake @acupofselfcontrol @when-the-skies-turn-pink @lyssieslifeee @sizzlingcandyj3llyf1sh @quiet-and-unknown2 @just-sleep-yall @vincian2 @fluffynebula @zephyrrr100 and anyone who wanna join in ! ^^

#tag game #long post #i love my moots #ive missed this acc idk

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all I am is all that I've been through