Ask the editor

"Your reports hold a surprising lack of pet and slave stories, as quaint as that might sound: I hereby demand as a paying customer more of said content. Also maybe more food ads. Actually you REALLY need more food ads."

Any articles that you've been particularly proud of?

An abandoned, unsigned letter reads, "Dear crow tengu... You must be tired writing about and keeping up with all the latest news in Gensokyo! I recognize your efforts, so here is a token of my appreciation! I hope you enjoy it! ♡" Beside the letter sits a plastic egg, inside of which is a chocolate egg. Inside is a sleeping drug that knocks you out for a couple hours at most. April Fools! (luckyyoukairabbittewi)

Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I really liked your suit. You know, the one you wore that one time in Forbidden Scrollery. You looked nice. That's all.

“Hey Aya, look!”

"Um... if it isn't too much trouble... could I send in an ad? I'm looking for someone to be my bodyguard... a certain amanojaku keeps harassing me."

So I see Hatate defended you in the face of slander. What, is Cirno going to pass the second grade now? Is Marisa going to return her *not* stolen books?

So, when are you going to comment about the single-most greatest band ever-Choujuu gigaku? We've had, like, two concerts already!

"Hello! I couldn't help but notice the ad for Taoism in today's paper. You wouldn't mind if I were to make use of it, would you?"

"There better not be fake news."