flashbacks & echoes.

Sebastian put his hand on Kurt’s thigh and moved closer to him. “Nothing is going to mess things up. The only thing standing between us being together and happy is us,” he said. “We have to fuck it all and take a chance,” he said, moving his hand to cup Kurt’s cheek. “Jump into the deep end with me?” he asked softly, looking into Kurt’s eyes. 

“You make it sound almost too easy.” He said quietly then looked back at Sebastian’s eyes and felt like he was about to melt in his touch. Kurt swallowed hard, wondering if he could actually do this. It all seemed so unreal to him. But he willed himself to do it, he had been trying to figure out what was missing for so long that he forgot that the only thing that he seemed to keep crawling back to in his life was Sebastian. “Okay.” Kurt finally said with a smile. “Let’s try this again.”

Sebastian finished his glass during the awkward silence and poured himself another. “Yeah, totally. All of that drama is water under the bridge,” he said, nodding. He took a breath and a big drink of wine before setting the glass down. “But I hope not everything is,” he said, turning to face him. “Because I’ve been thinking about you and us since I lost you… And now we’re both here, and single, and, fuck–” he sighed. “I should just… shut up now,” he muttered. 

Kurt watched as Sebastian finished off his glass and started for another, he almost told him to slow down but was cut off. He felt his heart tighten when Sebastian began talking and he wasn’t sure if it was just the wine talking or if he really felt that way but Kurt hoped there was at least some truth in it. “No-no. no no.” he quickly said, his heart pounding hard in his chest. “I...I’ve been thinking about you too. A lot. And everything seems to be pointing us towards each other again but I’m so scared, Sebastian. I don’t want to mess things up. I don’t want to lose you. Not again.”

“They weren’t all that great in high school either, were they? We kinda fucked everything up then too,” he said, shaking his head. 

Kurt furrowed his brows, frowning and staying silent for a bit. “Well, yeah, but that was with all the high school drama. We know better now.”  He told him then took a drink of his wine. “And we’ve totally put all that behind us...right?”

Sebastian smiled a little. He couldn’t help but be relieved that Kurt had been just as unlucky at fining someone new as he’d been. Sebastian smirked and took a drink of wine. “Not in the way that you mean. There hasn’t really been anything long term or serious.”

“I guess both our dating skills were better thrown off after we left high school, huh?”

“But why not? You’re the hottest guy on Broadway right now, you can’t tell me you aren’t getting offers,” he said, nudging his leg against Kurt’s. 

“You flatter me.” He said smiling then took a sip of his wine. “But honestly, none of them were really my type.I would go on casual dates but none of them really stuck with me. They were all trying way too hard I think. I guess once you try on Armani it’s hard to wear Hollister... What about you? Did you really go 9 years without having someone try to tie you down?”

He smiled to himself. Was Kurt jealous? He hoped so. He could also just be a curious friend. It didn’t matter. “No. I haven’t been doing a lot of dating,” he said. 

“Oh that’s good.” Kurt said with a smile then quickly dropped his face. “I mean, not good. But you know what I mean.” He told him. Fuck why was he such a nervous wreck around Sebastian? “I’m glad that you haven’t dated anyone...it makes me feel a little better since I hadn’t really doing a lot of dating either...Plus not jealous ex boyfriends to worry about now.”

“I’ll take your word for that one,” Sebastian said. “Interesting how?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“Interesting as in...interesting enough to keep around or maybe date?”

“I’ll be the good guy if the price is right,” Sebastian said. “Mhm, seven, actually, plus my gap year,” he said. “I mostly got my shit done, because I was on thin ice with my parents already. But I couldn’t stay away from partying completely, it was college.” 

Kurt laughed and gently pushed his arm, “Shark.” he said playfully , “You’re like Professor Challahan from Legally Blonde.”  He listened then chuckled, “Of course...So he did you meet anyone interesting at your fancy college?” he asked a little hesitantly, Kurt had been secretly wondering about Sebastian’s dating history. He didn’t see anything that would suggest a relationship on Facebook but then again he tried not to stalk his account too much.

“Most of them really aren’t great guys,” he said, shrugging. He laughed. “I haven’t really been out of college for that long,” he said. “But you’re probably right.” 

“So you’re supposed to be an exception, right?” He said sitting back, still looking at Sebasitan, “Oh right. You went to a good college that lasted longer than 4 years...still I guess most college experainces are similar. Did you party hard or did you actually try and get work done?”

“Lawyers don’t really follow the law,” he said with a smile. Sebastian finished pouring the glasses and then sat down next to Kurt on the couch ashe handed him his glass. “I think the only food I have here is a lemon in the fridge, so unless you wanted to make tequilas for dinner, we should get take out.”

“You make it sound like laywers are some sort of bad guy.” He told him then took a sip of wine and relishing the taste. “Are you sure you just didn’t stop aging after college? That seriously can’t be healthy.”

“I’ve been working like, 12 hour hours every day for the last few weeks. I haven’t really needed much besides my clothes,” he said as he reentered the living room. “Which means I definitely haven’t had time to cook anything. Not that I really could cook much if I wanted to,” he said, grabbing the bottle of wine that Kurt had brought. He opened it and poured them both generous glasses. 

“Is that even legal?” He asked surprised, “Here I thought that the shows were keeping us working too many hours on rehursals.” He told him as he crossed his legs and shook his head. “Wow. You really haven’t changed at all since high school.” he said teasingly, as he watched the amount that Sebastian served. “Well, since I’m here I could cook us something quickly. I don’t want you to die from malnutrition.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes at Kurt. “You’re being a little dramatic. It’s just stuff in boxes.” Sebastian lead Kurt into the living room. “Yes, Kurt. I have a touch, and a table, and a television. And a bed, if you want to sit there instead,” he said suggestively, followed by a little wink. “I’ll grab some wine glasses from the kitchen boxes,” he said, leaving Kurt in the living room. He went to the kitchen and looked around in a box before finding two glasses. He wiped the dust off and brought them back to the living room. 

“I’m not. You have all your stuff in boxes, Sebastian. How do you manage to live like this?” He asked as he followed him and looked around at the empty apartment. When Sebastian mentioned the bed he raised his eyebrows and laughed, “We’ll save that for another time.” He told him then took a seat at the couch. “So haven’t even unpacked your kitchen things. Have you even had a proper meal since you got here?” he asked

Sebastian hugged him back casually with a smile. He turned to look at the apartment as Kurt did. “More like, last month. But work’s been really busy and I just haven’t got around to unpacking,” he said, reaching a hand up to rub the back of his neck. “Like I said, it’s not pretty. We can go out instead if you want to…” he suggested. 

Kurt turned to Sebastian quickly, “A month?!” He yelled a little too loudly, he lowered his voice to a regular speaking volume before continueing, “How have you not packed for over 30 days?” He asked before furrowing his brows and shaking his head, “No, it’s fine. We can stay in here.” He looked around the apartment, “Do you have any glasses? Or like, anywhere to sit at all?”

Sebastian was nervous about having Kurt over. His apartment looked like he’d just moved in yesterday. The only things he’d unpacked were his work suits and the few dirty glasses that previously held scotch that were sitting in the sink. He hadn’t cared what the place looked like before, but now that Kurt was going to see it, he suddenly felt ashamed. He cleaned up by at least stacking some of the strewn about boxes in the living room, and made sure all of his take out containers were in the trash before he heard the knock. He quickly ran a hand through his hair before opening the door with a grin. “Hey, Kurt.” he said. “Come in,” he said, stepping back to allow Kurt inside. He shut the door behind him. “Sorry, again, for the rough shape the place is in…”

Kurt grinned widely as soon as he saw that Sebastian had opened the door but quickly turned it down to a smile - he didn’t want to look like some desperate virgin. “Hey,” He said trying to sound cool. When Sebastian took a step to the side, Kurt walked in and awkwardly stepped in to a hug before looking at him, “Oh no, don’t worry, I’m sure it’s fine.” He said then looked at the apartment. “Woah-” Kurt blinked, surprised to see the apartment mostly bare before turning to the other man. “When you said you just moved into the city...did you mean you just moved in like, last week?”

SEBASTIAN: Oh. Yeah, sure. My place is a little.. undercoated, right now. But that should be fine.

SEBASTIAN: Fine, but I'm right.

Kurt: I'm sure it will be. If not, well you know my love for interior decoration.

Kurt: Also I'll bring the wine.

SEBASTIAN: The whole night was pretty nice. But we should probably do something a little more contained the next time we want to get drunk together.

SEBASTIAN: Which will be soon, right?

SEBASTIAN: Shut up. You're adorable.

KURT: That's true...maybe we can go to your place next time. You've seen my apartment, it's only fair that I get to see yours.

KURT: Sure. I'm free next weekend if you are.