peace n pout

WHICH ONE IS PICKLES

i love history because u learn all the drama that’s ever happened in the world without having to get involved at all!! its the ultimate version of staying in ur own lane

friends: what do you want to do? my brain: die me @ my brain: we can’t say that. these people don’t understand casual existential despair

my favorite new trump supporter conspiracy theory is that hillary clinton was wearing a hidden earpiece feeding her debate answers because to them it’s simply implausible that a yale law school graduate is better at words and facts than an oversized circus peanut with hair

“Did I stutter?”

do you ever get in an “i don’t know” phase in your life. where you literally don’t have a solid answer to anything. you. just. don’t. know.

if it weren’t illegal i would eat cereal for every meal of the day

i have some wonderful news for you

*sees a rabbit run away from me* ….i’m on your side…..