Trifle-Untalkative Here

no rest for me and im not even that wicked ?

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

And is the "bus in zero minutes" at the stop with us right now?

What would you do if you were scrolling through recommended tumblr posts and one was from someone you don't know and it was just a picture of your dad captioned "fucking hate this guy" and it had hundreds of notes

reblog it

I was born in the exact right generation I love being an unmarried woman in my twenties with my own bank account and no children

[ID: Gif of Michael Jordan doing a lay-up and spinning backwards mid-air to slamdunk the basketball with one hand. End ID]

i bet it feels good as fuck to be a piece of sourdough bread that gets dipped in olive oil with various seasoning & herbs

but above all, one must not concern oneself with the opinions of people who censor the word fuck

i actually get a bit annoyed with people who get a bit annoyed when people say “sorry” in response to their bad news. “why are you apologizing you didn’t do anything :/” like okay well a) you don’t know that and actually yes i am the secret architect of all your woes and have been this whole time, way to refuse to acknowledge a woman (gender neutral)’s accomplishments. and b) we’re both fluent english speakers so you know perfectly well that “sorry” isn’t always an apology and is very commonly used as an expression of general regret or sympathy. not in this case, because i have been your secret nemesis for years, meticulously plotting your every misery, but, like, in general

I fucking love my bitter pill! Not even hard to swallow!

I WAS BORN YESTERDAY. I JUST BLEW IN FROM STUPID TOWN. THIS IS MY FIRST RODEO. PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME.