i couldn’t have done this without you. / teacher, post-sukuna
This fool. This stupid, lovable, fool. Wearing a grin like he's not confined to a hospital bed, his voice cheerful, undeterred, and composed, unlike his frayed husband sitting at his bedside. His usually tidy hair is unkept, black strands free from the bun oft worn, the bags under his eyes painting a perfect picture of the turmoil within.
It's nigh impossible to fight back overflowing emotions. Suguru's fists clench the bedsheets, hot tears spilling down his cheeks. “Who cares about that. When you… Satoru, I thought you were dead.” Wavering, his voice cracks and breaks into a sob. The fight plays out in his mind over and over again, a ceaseless torment. Blood. So much blood. Satoru's body in the midst of it all, broken into two, the monster possessing Megumi's body standing above him, victorious.
He'll never forgive the zoom-in on Satoru's face. Never forgive the way he was then held back, stopped from storming out into the middle of the battlefield to help.
Struggling to escape his captors, he'd been thrown back to the past. He saw that man, tall and mocking, mentioning unabashed how he'd murdered Suguru's everything.
The despair he'd felt back then was nought like the torrent he'd felt at that moment. How could he go on without the piece that made him whole? The one killed in front of his eyes, lilacs unable to tear themselves away from the horror show on the screen.
His sunshine, his world, snuffed out in an instance. A nightmare held for years bearing fruit, his heart torn out and crushed.
There are no words to describe such pain. Nothing, but the sound of Suguru's broken weeping as grasps loosened and let him sink to the floor.
But miracles, as it turns out, can occur a second time.
He didn't cut my head off, Suguru recalls Satoru explaining when they were young, so I was able to heal through it. Unable to knit the grievous wounds severing his body himself, Shoko stepped in, the pile of accumulating cigarettes abandoned in favour of saving her friend.
And it worked, somehow. It's why he lays here now, alive and breathing. Touchable, soft skin warm against the palm of the teacher's hand as he cups Satoru's cheek.
Suguru leans forward and imparts a smattering of kisses to Satoru's forehead and lips, damp cheek resting on top of his shoulder after. He tries not to place too much pressure — the last thing his husband needs is more pain. “Never scare me like that again, do you hear me? My heart couldn't take it a third time.” A hand seeks Satoru's, and twins their fingers together in a silent, desperate plea. Don't go where I can't follow you. I can't lose you.