/ / * 𝗗𝗔𝗗𝗗𝗬.

sitting beside his wife speechlessly as blair and the doctors chatted about everything that was happening, trevor sat completely lifeless in a state of dismay. as hard as he tried he couldn’t focus on the words being exchanged by his wife and the two medical professionals -- the sound of their child’s heartbeat made everything else seem faint. it was difficult to wrap his mind around the reality that he and blair had conceived an actual person. of course, they weren’t being careful -- the two hadn’t been using protection, but they were married and he thought them having a child was out of the picture. “mr. harris... are you alright?” the gynecologist questioned in a gentle tone, offering a reassuring squeeze to his shoulder which snapped him from his daydream state back to presence. “mrs. harris and the baby are both doing just fine dad... try not to worry.” she added handing him a picture of their unborn child. his thumb traced the outline on the sonogram, their beautiful miracle. when the doors closed leaving just the newly wedded couple trevor turned to blair and handed her the picture. “we’re having a baby...” he murmured as he brought her hand to his lips and left gentle kisses on each of her knuckles.  

@trevorharris: all i know is that the dog jumped on the piano and spilled red wine all over the place 😅😩

trevor had been broken before, there was no hiding that he had deep-rooted abandonment issues. both the harris boys came into the world with their hearts on their sleeves only to be demolished by the world over time. blair had been the first person he had true feelings for in the longest time. she brought out the best in him, placed his shattered glass like pieces back together. seeing her in such a defenseless condition made him feel hopeless. but her words echoed in his mind and pacified his shaking essence. the doctor took his concentration and gaze from his wife, “yeah i’m the husband.” he reciprocated, blinking rapidly as she listed all of blair’s injuries. he immediately felt his jaw clench and his palms begin to perspire but somehow he was even more appreciative that she was alive and here with him. “you’re so done driving for awhile.” he whispered to her before the white-coated doctor’s next words caused his jaw to drop. “fetus?” trevor asked, giving her both the physician and blair a thoroughly bewildered look. they’d both made peace with the idea of not being able to have a family. sure it was something he’d always wanted, children with his wife, but if she wasn’t able they’d make due. after all they’d have each other. before he could argue, a faint heartbeat filled the room and his blood ran cold -- “blair... is that?”

“ no, i married a daredevil in dior.” he corrected before grabbing the remote to turn the tv to anything that wasn’t a news station. trevor was having a hard enough time processing this evening's proceedings without seeing blair on a stretcher being raced to the hospital. the sight made crumble emotionally, which he couldn’t do seeing as he was trying his best to be an emotional rock for the woman he promised the rest of his life to. shaking his head, he slowly made his way from the chair beside the hospital bed to the bed itself beside blair. her words formed a small smile on his lips which was all he could muster up as of now. clearing his throat, trevor delicately draping an arm around the petite brunette at his side, “i say a prayer and send it to you, that my heart will always be true... life won't be the same without you, i say thank you i’m a lucky man.” he sang softly pressing his lips to her head as gingerly as possible, “i didn't know what life was but now i understand, oh this is love, love, love, love, love precious love this is precious love, and its teaching me, to be a better man, this is precious love, oh its precious love no i can't get enough, oh i'm down on my knees, it's there that i see you must be from heaven above, yeah its love, love, love, love, love, precious love..” by the time he’d finished his mind was flooded with illustrations of them on their wedding day dancing to the same exact song and his oceanlike eyes pooled with tears. “i thought i lost you, you know, and i couldn’t imagine... what i was going to do with myself...” he admitted slowly shaking his dark brow locks.

what do i love most about her? i love that she’s the type of woman who took the time to pick up the pieces of a broken man and put him back together – she stood by me through a lot, she’s made me a better man. i think it takes a lot for a person to take time to mend a person who was broken by someone before they even came into the picture. she’s my better half and she’s made me whole for the first time in my life.

i love esmee – all things with my brother aside. she and i’ve worked together a lot, she’s still like family and she’s a good person with a good heart. i think esmee and finn have a really long and in-depth history which guided them to where they are now – but i think finn’s really in a good place with bree and i really enjoy spending time with brenna as well. so do with this as you please, cause i don’t wanna say the wrong thing and have him be a shit to me.

 xiomara’s new song is probably one of my new favorites, brighter than sunshine by aqualung (throwback but it’s still a bop), anything by lizzo, chateau lobby #4 by father john misty, simply the best by noah reid, precious love by james morrison, free energy by free energy, party police by alvvays – i could go on all night.

@malibustarters​

@trevorharris: @spencer5sos @josh5sos 👀