Devil you call me

Chat should I be considering a new therapist after being told I'm "not normal" as a disabled person

Toothache so bad I had to take a little impromptu nap about it ✨️

When you hit the pen but now you gotta pen sneeze and you know it's gonna explode every blood vessel in your face and also somehow make the hi even better

*boots up the video game and then looks at phone for so long the controller disconnects and the console forgets who's playing*

Tonight, after attempting to remove red bull from my diet and having the worst four days in recent memory, I would like to thank stimulants for making me not wish I could disappear as much

Today I almost had a customer threaten me because I couldn't complete his transaction because my workplace removed the app I needed for that and did not replace it. At all 🩷✨️

Wish there was like an underground healthcare system where u could just walk in with ur symptoms journal and b like "Dude. I've done the research. I'm Pretty Sure. Can we like, just do the tests that'll tell us if I'm right and then treat me when if it proves I am?"

Gonna start just saying "Thank you, Janet" exasperatedly whenever somebody at work tries to help me in a most unhelpful way and see how many people get the reference and how many just think I'm calling them a weird insult

Just woke up from a dream where I was lying on a metal table under a bright light and these figures wearing what looked like steampunk plague doctor masks were standing over me picking at my brain with surgical implements. That's just... a visual that my brain gifted to me tonight.

I love weed and the way it's makes me less socially inadequate

Getting the hiccups while you're mid-chew on a pretzel is an extreme sport.

Listen here officer. Why do they EVEN make reclining driver's seats if not so that I can lay fully down on my back while driving 75mph up the interstate, as is my GOD-GIVEN AMERICAN RIGHT