MARY ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ₊ nineteen ⸝⸝ [n]sfw writing blog for a lot of fandoms ⊹ ࣪ ˖ no reqs. no spam likes, please and thank you. my letters to you.

“Is that a statue?” you ask, squinting at the fishpond. A few turtles were lazily swimming about, and two in particular were perched up on a rock. “Wow, these look so realistic. This is where our taxes go: turtle maintenance in parks. Can’t say I’m disappointed, though.”

Katsuki snorts. “Don’t think it’s a statue.”

“But I think it is,” you insist with a small frown. “Can—“ you glance at the sign, “—Red-eared sliders really stay still for that long?

He shrugs, shifting a bit of his weight against the railing. A few people are staring at you (mostly him, because he was Dynamight), but he didn’t care in the slightest. Katsuki finds himself just staring at you, and the rest could just blow themselves to bits. “Want me to look that up?”

“No, because you’re going to be right, and I have too much pride for that.”

Katsuki chuckles at the honest answer. He loves that about you. Well, he loves many things about you. How you could be forward and honest with him without feeling the need to be intimidated. There’s nothing to be afraid of; he’s not that scary, he thinks.

“I am way too invested in this as a 29-year-old,” you murmur in awe. The turtle was trying to climb an elevated rock but kept slipping. Each time it slipped, you groan but continue cheering for it.

“What’s age got to do with being amazed by some reptiles?” he asks.

“Nothing,” you admit. “Aside from the fact that I haven’t even seen one until today.”

He stills. “What the fuck? Really?”

“Really, really,” you answer. “Honestly, now that I think about it, you can leave me here all day and I’d be entertained for the whole 24 hours.”

That doesn’t feel right. It’s a simple thing—to see at least a turtle once. It’s not like it was the most out-of-touch thing to experience. People can go to the zoo or a theme park.

Or maybe because Katsuki’s been exposed to these types of things at a young age, he forgot that not all had the same experiences as him.

“Let’s go to an aquarium museum this weekend, then,” he offers gruffly.

You nod happily, not even fighting the excitement you felt. “That’s— I won’t be able to sleep a wink this whole week, Katsuki! I’m so excited!” you laugh as he holds your cheeks with just one hand to hush you. “‘m seriouws! Ish goin’ to be awesome!”

Despite Katsuki’s slight flush, he only smiles at you. Yeah, he’ll learn to appreciate the simpler things in life alongside you.

Katsuki knows he’s at his lowest when he’s staring at your number on his phone. It’s not like there’s an actual emergency that requires you to be the first responder, but… well, it’s not like you were still his emergency contact.

This situation makes him look helpless and desperate, and for a staggering moment of vulnerability that makes his heart drop, he accepts that he is. There’s no particular reason to be longing for what he and you had. Yet he can’t help but wallow in the past anyway.

He remembers, then, how easy it is to call you. Whatever it is that happened in his life, no matter if it’s small or something worth celebrating, it’s you who always comes to mind that he wants and needs to talk to. 

Because Katsuki had learned to need to hear your voice first thing in the morning—and be it the last thing he relishes just as he’s about to close his eyes. You’d always have this cheeky tone, as if you were just as excited as him. “Hello, Katsuki? Hi! What’s up?” And all the worry that’s lodged in his mind clears without a moment to waste.

He decides to call. The dial rings once, twice, until it leads to voicemail.

Katsuki doesn’t call again. He knows. He knows that you didn’t answer on purpose. You reminded him so.

“Please don’t call,” you murmured, eyes cast on the floor then. “Because I won’t answer anymore. For once, Katsuki, let me salvage what’s left of the respect I have for myself.”

“But what if I needed to talk to you?” he replies, because he might actually need to.

“You won’t. Call your friends. Call your parents.”

Katsuki knew you meant this in the nicest way possible. He’s exhausted you to the point where staying with him is no longer the best option for either of you.. He doesn’t know how to lessen your burdens, your fears, your worries, and your exhaustion.

So he doesn’t ring a second time. You’ve let him go. You had to let him let you go.

So he doesn’t call you anymore. He owes you that as an apology and respect to your wish.