certified dogboy

someone needs to invent reverse cornflakes. i want to eat a cereal that gives me a demonic erection and inflicts upon me an insatiable lust

reading this as someone who does cross stitch but is scared of the other kinds of embroidery is like overhearing an incredibly tall and buff person say they have beef with Mr. Tom, the kitten that chills at the bookstore

FUCK Mr. Tom and his stupid little fluffy tail ok. And his little charted designs.

Okay, but this neglects the true villain of embroidery stitches: the French knot

Don't you dare malign my girl again

Ok the french knot is very useful but it is a BITCH to do it consistently

We talk about how this website’s hate mail game is insane, but this might just be a new level

"skill issue" made entirely from French knots is a next level roast. no coming back from that one. damn

I have the stupidest, pettiest poll to make. I'm debating whether or not I make it because it's pure haterism but I really want to.

We NEED to keep talking about how celebrities are getting too thin. We need to talk about how that is not healthy, how it isnt and shouldn't be a beauty standard. We have to do it for Gen alpha growing up and for everyone else who lived through this once and recovered

the tiktokification of tumblr needs to be stopped

we don’t censor words here stop acting like a fool, when you censor words and tags people who have that word filtered due to triggers will still see it

#smoking tw

My cousin, ashamed after building a chair from IKEA.

this is one of the best posts i have ever seen

OH MY GOD

I laugh every time I see this

that is the face of a man worried he will be next

Good news, he was not next! In fact, she accepted him as her mate, he learned the crane mating dance and now every year, he artificially inseminates her with crane semen to expand the very endangered crane population. True story.

Sorry, he WHAT? Imagine being this man's boss and having to sit him down like. Listen. Brian. We need you to fuck the bird. You have to act like you're excited about it.

crane husband.....

this is the diametric opposite of all those awful swan wife stories and i love it.

Not only is he 'married' to walnut, this has apparently happened SEVERAL times, so he has MULTIPLE crane wives, none of which know about any of his other crane wives. This man is, for some unknown reason, irresistible to cranes

the “this content has been removed for violating Tumblr’s Community Guidelines” notice really adds a lot of flavor to this post and somehow makes it MORE obscene than whatever that actually was

World Heritage Post

I regret being the bearer of bad news, but I thought it should be shared that Walnut passed away in January of this year (2024). There's a lot of mixed info about the lifespan of cranes (due to people misunderstanding what a median is...) but the average for most species I know of is 20-30 years (in the wild if nothing eats them/they don't die young), and 30-45 in captivity, with the oldest known white-naped crane having loved to be 46. Given that she was 42, this old gal did good, and I'm certain she will be missed by folks here.

Fly on forever Walnut Crane-Crowe

me about to tell the waiter i'd like some dubious consent with my order when i realise that they've already added it without asking me first