RANSGENDER BEAM ATTAC

dont interact w this blog if ur not mutuals with me on my main btw.

my mon threatened to kill my dog earlier lol i love this house !!!!!!!!!!fucking get me out of here

my memory has been getting worse and worse and worse it's at the point where i genuinely dont remember if i actually said something to someone a few days ago or if i just imagined it. i hate this

just tried inviting my one irl friend to come celebrate my bday with me on the 24th and he said that literally his only work shift that week is on the 24th. ouch

mfw i feel like all my friends have someone who cares about them and i literally have no one who ever checks in on me or responds to my vents with anything more than ' damn that sucks ' or tries to make sure im okay

my mom will literally watch one of her kids get hurt and then say " well if you werent doing that in the first place you wouldntve gotten hurt " WE'RE KIDS. WE'RE CHILDREN. YOU HAVE TO EXPECT US TO DO DUMB SHIT AND MAYBE YOU SHOULD FUCKING HELP US INSTEAD OF BEING CONDESCENDING

wish we could go ONE GODDAMN DAY in this house without someone yelling at everyone !!!!!!!!! id love that

damn i wish I could like. Take A Break when shit happens to me but im a teenager so yknow. gotta wake up at nine every morning to do chores. love it here

spiralled myself into thinking i was having a heart attack last night and subsequently thought i wouldnt wake up this morning. but i did :] and im fine btw i just have anxiety

realized today that im That Friend in the group who always gets left behind while walking and is constantly treated like theyre not even there. lmao.

i will be minding my own business on this site and then fifty million posts will come on my dash like " trans people are being killed. children are being killed. the planet is being killed. do something. do something. " and then i get depressed because theres nothing i can do.

i think that if i ever do end up making something popular with my ocs i will kill anybody who tries to do things i dont like with my characters

i lovee feeling like i create for nothing and that no one cares when i post art ive spent hours on. i love getting three notes on my art and two of them are likes. i love when i post about my ocs and post about my ocs and post about my ocs and it still feels like no one wants to listen to all the information and worldbuilding and lore ive made for them. i love being so passionate about my creative projects that i constantly feel like im annoying people when i talk about it. i love this.

am i actually about to cry because my mom said i can't have half of a goddamn muffin ? yeah .

fucking. i was " jokingly " hinting to my mom that im fucking disabled and she started lecturing me about how im definitely not disabled and how im just lazy and need to walk around more. you dont fucking get it mom i CANT walk more my fucking legs hurt all the time and i cant handle the cold and its so much more difficult than you think it is. youll never fucking understand how it feels to go years thinking something is wrong with you only for the people who are supposed to love you no matter what to tell you youre faking it and you just need to exercise more. youre never gonna know what its like. i know my body better than you ever could and if i say i think im disabled you should LISTEN instead of giving me a goddamn lecture on exercising. fuck you.

uggfhfhgh

man. a girl who was in a discord server im in just left and blocked me because i told her she needed to put a trigger warning on one of her messages.